[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vm / vmg / vr / vrpg / vst / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / pw / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / vt / wsg / wsr / x / xs] [Settings] [Search] [Mobile] [Home]
Settings Mobile Home
/adv/ - Advice

[Advertise on 4chan]

4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
[Hide] [Show All]

Janitor applications are now being accepted for the next ~72 hours. Apply here.

New board added: /xs/ - Extreme Sports

Self-serve ads are available again! Check out our new advertising page here.

[Advertise on 4chan]

[Catalog] [Archive]

File: Biden.png (1.16 MB, 778x777)
1.16 MB
1.16 MB PNG
How do I stop being so uncomfortable or intimidated by women who openly use men?

Subs like FemaleDatingStrategy.. knowing women manipulate men, ever since I was a kid, I'd see the stories of men needing permission from their GFs/wives to hang out with friends, and it's disgusted me. I told myself I would never let a woman take advantage of me.

I dated a woman who I fell head over heels with, and she took advantage of me, I was just another beta orbiter and I'm so disgusted with myself... It's soured my relationship with women because I just can't help but feel like they're only there to manipulate me.

I have no interest in women anymore. I'm not gay, I'm still attracted to women, but I'm just disgusted because of her.
10 replies omitted. Click here to view.
You might be better off learning how to read manipulation attempts and then not getting involved with people who do that shit (although this can lead down a road of hypersensitivity to perceived manipulation if you're not careful). Everyone manipulates everyone else at least subtly, often unconsciously. Once you get past that, I don't think the majority of women are necessarily manipulators and I think the ones who are so good at it that you wont notice it if you're looking are even less.
>I dated a woman who I fell head over heels with, and she took advantage of me, I was just another beta orbiter and I'm so disgusted with myself
So this is really the issue, you had your heart broken and now you see what hurt you in everyone else. This is pretty common, you might want to see a therapist to work through this misplaced hatred so it doesn't fester, which it will if you don't address it. It happens to the best of us, don't beat yourself up too much
Therapy is expensive 4chan is free
I’m glad to hear that there are some good women out there

Yeah I think your second point is spot on, she sent me a photo album of guys she’s got to do derogatory things to themselves and I was one of them, I realized at that point I was just another toy for this bitch to play with
>How do I stop being so uncomfortable or intimidated by women who openly use men?
Birds eat insects. Do you hate birds for that?
Prey animals exist in nature. Sometimes they are humans.

tough luck, little buddy, most women openly use men for safety.

if you're not in a relationship where you can call your gf a cunt and she calls you one back, that's gay

you should try to quit being such a fag

I e-dated this chick when I was in highschool for almost a year, but I never got to see what she looked like, we always voice chatted but she never went on cam.

(I know I know it’s pathetic)

For the most part I got over that relationship until she reached out to me a few years later and we chatted, she told me she was catfishing me this whole time, she sent me a pic of what she actually looked like and now I’m just feeling like a big emotional wreck.

Now I’m feeling the same emotions I did when we first broke up and I don’t know what to do or while I feel this way.

I was fine until I started talking to her, I just feel really emotionally confused and I don’t know if I should keep talking to her or just cut it off, but there’s a part of me that still wants to talk to her
I took the relationship seriously, as any 10th grader in their first relationship would, I don’t want to feel anything for this person anymore for the harm they caused but I just can’t stop my train of thought
>she sent me a pic of what she actually looked like and now I’m just feeling like a big emotional wreck.
Congrats, you played stupid games and won stupid prizes.
Feel bad. And let this be a reminder to you that online relationships aren't real.
If you're ERPing, then you're in a relationship with a fictional persona. Not a real person.

File: jhhd.jpg (316 KB, 441x574)
316 KB
316 KB JPG
My girlfriend has a very pointed chin. When she couldn't get a package open, I suggested she could cut it open with her chin. She hasn't talked to me since. Should I apologize? It was just a joke
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>Fuck no. You will now caress her face, and her chin, a lot.
Hopefully I do not cut myself on it
absolutely based
She has thin skin AND a pointy ass chin. Don't apologise. Train the bitch to take a joke.
Only make fun of people for things they can easily change. Dick move my dude.
Holy shit, that caught me off guard, OP. I almost choked on chips.
You can get a new gf easily if you're that funny.

File: 1611712825966.jpg (548 KB, 2012x2048)
548 KB
548 KB JPG
Does anyone here have any stories of the lives of the family members of people who have committed suicide, whether you are one of those family members yourself or you know them personally? I'd like to specifically know if those family members have went on to live close to normal or happy lives after the suicide of their family members, also useful to know would be how many other family members they have who could help them as they mourn the death of their loved one. pic unrelated
4 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Sheesh anon, was she that bad to you?
Yes, she was.
My Grandfather stopped taking his schizophrenia medication and jumped in front of a train like 6 years ago.
My mother (his daughter) was destroyed and while already depressed, fell deeper into depression eventually developing psychosis ~2 years after the event. We got her medicated pretty quick and she was back to normal, albeit depressed within six or twelve months. Only now, on lower medication doses, six years after everything has started to feel joy again.

My mum doesn't have a huge support network and people her age don't really know how to work around mental health issues so things were definitely tough for her.
I have after your post, the subreddit has what I'm looking for, thank you
One of my cousins killed herself.
I didn't give a shit.

File: ddgjv31nx4x51.png (250 KB, 800x387)
250 KB
250 KB PNG
I'm a neet, raised by lesbian parents.been bullied for my whole life. I don't have any hobbies, my parents make it awkward for me to engage in anything so I grew up not getting into any sort of enjoyable activities (including anime and video games which i've heard is what the majority of internet people are into). Everything is hard. It is harder because my parents forbids me to do anything but lets my sister do/gets everything she wanted because "girls deserve to be independent". Parents also treat my like how old male boomers treat their daughters because they wanted me to have a taste of how oppressed females are. They won't let me drive and they won't let me get a job. They just generally hate men. I fucking dislike all that is around me, I used to have a deadbeat dad but he left so i'm pretty much fucked. I just want to find a way to escape these 2 whores that are ruining my life.

File: feels.jpg (23 KB, 400x400)
23 KB
I've abused drugs through out my life, nothing too hard but enough to lightly fuck me over.
I tried a shit ton of drugs from the doctors, anti-anxieties, anti-depressants, anti-psychotics from 14 to 24.
I took Ambien early on in life around 16 or 17 and at random point in life.
I drank alcohol to party from 15 to roughly 24.
I started smoking weed from 20 to present (29).
I tried shrooms from 25 to 28 or so.
I smoked tobacco randomly from 23 to present but recently started smoking often but quit last week.
I start trying random weird stuff like (Valerian Root, Melatonin, DXM, DPH, Kava Kava, Kratom, Gabapentin) from 18 to 26.
I started abusing opioids from 24 to present, haven't taken any in two weeks.

Currently prescribed Hydroxyzine for sleep but it's way too heavy for me and doesn't get me high.
Ambien is the perfect sleep aid for me, despite the doctors having told me no to a prescription since 2011.
I don't want to take opioids, I have almost zero physical desire for it two weeks out.
I have zero urge to take shrooms.
I hate the taste of alcohol and have removed it from my life with ease.

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.

File: wtf.jpg (101 KB, 1024x904)
101 KB
101 KB JPG
>be me, 3rd day of nofap
>have sexual dream
>cum in sleep
This happened twice already, how am i supposed to gather benefits of nofap if i keep cummin?
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
why? i am avoiding hardcore stuff
how would i benefit from complete abstinence?
i am not in contact with any females currently and it gets hard to cope

Nofap is complete bullshit. It was born out of a response to the negative effects of porn (which I agree with)

nutting is actually healthy, and AFAIK there's 0 research done that proves any benefits to semen retention.. It's a cult and it's all in your head.
File: mmm.jpg (106 KB, 1047x1404)
106 KB
106 KB JPG
I believe that temporary abstinence (up to 2 weeks) improves motivation and confidence simply due to increased horniness. Some studies include increased testosterone. I am trying to harness those benefits.

I went 7 weeks once and although i saw benefits i wouldnt suggest going more that 2 weeks since reaching that point was self-torturing and it wasnt worth it in the end.
Nofap doesn't do much objectively. It's the added testosterone in your body that actually helps you with your body and mind. Read up on how to increase testosterone naturally and your willpower and general state of mind get better without this obsession with masturbation.
So you say that noFap does increase testosterone?

File: IMG_20210224_011454.png (18 KB, 322x322)
18 KB
Everytime I get more intimate with a girl i become too gentle or soft. I compliment her all the time, talk about my insecurities, show off a lot of affection, etc. And I feel like that makes them less interested in me.
Am I doing something wrong? Should I change? How?
6 replies omitted. Click here to view.
can you elaborate further about this? like, maybe some examples?
This. Please
>Everytime I get more intimate with a girl i become too gentle or soft. I compliment her all the time, talk about my insecurities, show off a lot of affection, etc.
Seems normal.
Are you addicted to your sadness and do you invent excuses to tell yourself that you're allowed to feel sad? For instance, do you repeatedly feel sad and insecure about height / dick size / income, despite her clearly already fucking you and therefore into you?
If you aren't addicted to your sadness, and your insecurities get weaker over time, then I fail to see a problem.
If you ARE addicted to your sadness and you refuse to overcome your insecurities, that's yer problem.
>can you elaborate further about this?
You need to tell her what you want from your relationship and get her to help you with it, and make no apologies for liking what you like and dragging her along with you.
Passivity is when you don't have ambition and you don't lead the woman with you in your chase of that ambition. It's when you don't have expectations and standards for her. It's when you apologise for being yourself instead of finding faith in yourself.
We all have problems. But, most of us have solutions. Assertiveness is aiming at yer solutions. Passiveness is focusing on yer problems.

last night I was face timing with my girlfriend; i dont even remember what we were talking about, I think it may have been work / hobby related or something, but all of a sudden she goes "maybe you'll get a real job instead of working for your step dad and his friend!"

Background, im 25, shes 21. I've been painting houses with my step dad and his friend since I was 15. His friend runs a business / works for himself. They pay me 20+/hr, which is more than any other job I've had, and I've also learned a fuck ton in 10 years and I'm hoping to start my own business soon. All I really need to do is make an LLC.

My girlfriend dropped out of college from depression / anxiety and hasnt worked in months. But she'll still talk shit for my job like that.

Am I being too sensitive or is she being a bitch? I went to college / have worked so many other fields but I like painting cause I know it so well and I think I can start my own business
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Best advice is don’t come to 4chan for advice on your relationship before you’ve even brought it to your gf, who knows better than any of us do about what she meant by the statement and wether or not you two need to sort some stuff out.

Just talk to her, it’s been said a million times before because it’s true: communication is key. If she says “you’re being a little bitch” explain to her why you feel otherwise, and if you two still disagree and it seems like a big enough issue then break up. Chances are though she’ll say “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it that way” or “I’m sorry, that was insensitive of me” and you can talk until the two of you are satisfied with where things stand.

Remember, you aren’t being a bitch if something makes you feel a certain way then it does, so don’t let her tell you that you’re a bitch. Unless you like being walked all over, it’s your life.
>I've been painting houses with my step dad and his friend since I was 15. His friend runs a business / works for himself.
Sounds like a real job desu.
>is she being a bitch?
Been a house painter/home improvement contractor for almost 30 years mate,
If your doing a job you love and getting well paid for it, you got life by the short and curlies. She is just being a standard female, they like to "test the fences" from time to time.
But don't beat yourself up over it mate, i truly think women have forgotten how to be supportive or caring without being manipulative
>They even do her laundry and cook her dinner and all.

This is pathetic. Are you serious with this with this girl?
Yeah I agree, I appreciate this
Yeah I bust ass and make a lot of money, also do side jobs every once and awhile
Oh word! Thanks for the advice

File: pFtjkdg.png (28 KB, 1920x1080)
28 KB
Does anyone else feel detached from their gender, as if they are stuck somewhere in the middle?

I hit 30 late last year, and I'm a virgin. Visually, guys always appealed more to me, but never to a point where I want to do anything romantic. I don't feel like I fit into any real gender role.

This isn't some weird trans talk. I know what gender I am, I know what bits I possess, and I am not denying that. It just doesn't feel like sex or even just romantic relationships make sense. I have never done anything because it felt like I would just be forcing it, and I am just not sure why I would want to do it.

Can anyone here relate to this? Does anyone know how to fix this, or is it just something I should accept and ignore? I'd be happy to hear any and all perspectives on this, especially someone who has dated someone with this mentality.
you probably don't feel attractive are you female? I'd say females especially have a specific feminine look that if you don't follow then you might feel like you don't belong.

But this is wrong, femininity comes in loads of different forms. Maybe you have other problems like body image issues that are seeping into gender issues
>Does anyone else feel detached from their gender
I do, yes, because the sex of the human I reside within isn't important to what I do and isn't a part of my identity.
My _lack of_ gender isn't my identity either. Instead I base my identity on my opinions and my emotions.
>I don't feel like I fit into any real gender role.
Then ignore them and do your job. Be good at your hobby. Find value in whatever it is you choose to do.
>It just doesn't feel like sex or even just romantic relationships make sense.
Then stop giving a shit, they're optional.
>Can anyone here relate to this?
Yes, and worrying about it is stupid.
>I'm a virgin
sounds like you need lots of orgasms to remind you of your gender.
>you probably don't feel attractive are you female? I'd say females especially have a specific feminine look that if you don't follow then you might feel like you don't belong.
Wasn't raised all that well. My older brother by 4 years taught me more about how to behave than my parents did, and I had absolutely no friends, so I don't have that good of a grasp on how I am supposed to act or feel.

I don't have a problem with how I look, though. I never have those "Don't like how I look" thoughts, so it would be pretty deeply buried if that's the problem.

>I do, yes, because the sex of the human I reside within isn't important to what I do and isn't a part of my identity.
It hasn't been for me either for a very long time. I'm just starting to feel like I'm missing out on a big part of life. I have a house paid off, I have a good well-paid job, and something is just missing. Like having an empty room I should be using for something, but choose not to.

I met a girl, and I want to ask her out. She's nice, cute without being too obsessed with looks, fun to be with, and we share some interests. She has a stable, high-income job (so do I).

But. Her sister is a full-fledged cam whore. I've found photos of her sister's tits and pussy on Reddit, she has an OnlyFans, she has an Amazon wishlist with vibrators and stuff, a camsite account... she seems to do solo/girl stuff, haven't seen any guys in her free material.

This seems like a red flag. I feel this camwhore sister could be a liability - money troubles, relationship troubles, and when that trouble comes knocking on your door at 3AM asking for a bed and 1000 bucks, you can't say no. They're quite close, so it's not like the more "traditional" sister has rejected her ways.

Thoughts? Better to just stay friends with her, to avoid trouble?
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>Her sister's a camwhore

So what? in what possible way does that affect you?
>The relatives of my significant other have no impact whatsoever on my life
In-laws don't exist in your world do they?
Ignore all other idiot children posts. This is correct. It is a red flag. Take note it is not NECESSARILY a complete disqualification. But do take note of it. Often people from poor upbringings do in fact develop quite well using it as eustress and take note of what NOT to do simply going out of their way to make the opposite decisions modeled to them. What kind of boundaries does she have with her sister though. How much influence does said whore have on her? What kind of stress do they cause in her life and how does she direct that stress in any ways affecting you. Etc.
>What kind of stress do they cause in her life and how does she direct that stress in any ways affecting you. Etc.
Thanks, I think this is a great point. So basically, proceed with caution and gauge their relationship. If the camwhore consistently gets into trouble, and this girl (who isn't my gf yet) always feels like she has to bail her out, and this also impacts me to a significant degree, it may be more than I'm willing to deal with. If I wanted to deal with the stresses of dating a camwhore, I'd just date a camwhore.
they only affect your life to the extent you allow them to. don't be such a pussy the rest of your life.

File: lXSWGjR.png (65 KB, 1092x1037)
65 KB
Mom got put on antidepressants and is off work for a month. What do?
Start living independently and make steps towards getting a job and renting your own place.
Quit suckin' your mom's tit, you're over the age of 18.
sex her

So this is another porn addicted anon but it’s BAD

Boys I’ve been jerking off (a lot) for more than 4 years [since junior high] and I think I’m witnessing the problems... Ive had multiple encounters when fucking and when I do sometimes it don’t feel good and I start to go soft when I am hitting it from the back or front and gotta jerk off to finish ( 20yr old wtf is wrong w/ me I should be fucking like a ogre)also when a female is naked infront of me I don’t get auto hard, only if I get seduced ( is that bad or am I retarded ) last is I get awkward chubs when I’m talking to girls sometimes as well. Anybody help me with this? I wanna fuck girls good like a goat
Bro you gotta stop early. I was like you. It’s called porn induced ED, it’s not physical more

Basically all those girls you coomed to equated to sexual partners in your brain. The more girls you coom to the more you will be disensitize your cock to normal pleasures.

It was so bad I had anxiety performing, went soft. I even couldn’t coom or stay hard from a happy ending tug job. That’s when I decided to do SEMEN RETENTION.

At first it was tough. The first 2 weeks of not cooming since I was young was hard. Now I’m a year in, I’m more manly and my cock gets brick mode randomly
Now. I get hard from just talking to my gf.

Eat a low carb high fat diet. Do HIIT and eat foods that promote testosterone. Do heavy compound lifts. The key now is to maximize test and reduce estrogen. The latter is just as important. Avoid onions, really nitpick what you eat and see if it fucks with your hormones.
Semen retention is kind of a meme for everything but getting over porn. Hold in your cum as long as you can, and you have to stop watching porn to do that. Once you're over porn, you can keep jerking off if you like

My girlfriend says that she prefers black men over white guys like myself. She said if she's allowed to be in a relationship with black guys, then we can still date. What should I tell her to that won't compromise my relationship?
4 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Stale pasta is stale.
Kill her kill yourself and kill the nigger boy she fucks
this can’t be real
u can look for a new gf before u dump her
Mean but whatever
Discord tranny
tell her you identify as black, and she's racist if she doesn't accept that. problem solved.

File: 1579396230907.jpg (299 KB, 1651x1227)
299 KB
299 KB JPG
So I live in a 1bed 1 bath guest house the size of a small apartment.
Recently, the power went out to 90% of my place. Only 4 outlets work. The rest of them, including the ceiling lights, don't. Here's what I've done so far:

> went outside and checked power box.
> No breakers were thrown.
> found the one breaker that controls the only series of functioning outlets.
> take said breaker and switch it with the one directly below it to see if the breaker it's self needs replacing.
> this does nothing.
> sequentially test all breakers and their respective appliances.
> only ac and 4 outlets working

What's going on? I didn't trip anything on the board so is this a wiring issue?

Notes about the house:

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.

Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.