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I got a woman pregnant a while ago and that was before I got dishonorably discharged from the navy. I don't want to get in to what I did to earn that, that isn't the point. I swore to myself I would never let a kid go without a father if it's mine. He's 3, and I'm only recently back, I didn't expect him to exist, I have no experience with this. She barely knows me and he's never met me. I am looking for parenting advice and relationship advice. Maybe tips on how to get a 3 year old boy to trust and like you and how to get a woman you thought you were seperated from to let you be part of your son's life. I'm sorry about the rude attached file, but I have to have one to post.
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>>22281213
Just horn right in there. A three year old is going th love his father and his mother is going to love for him to be happy. Make that shit work.
>>
>>22281213
What’s it like being black?
>>
>>22282157
>What’s it like being black?
>"I would never let a kid go without a father if it's mine. "
OP doesn't sound black
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>>22282182
Fag
>>
Just jump right in. The kid is most important an my view. Try to spend as much time as possible with him. Sports, video games, ice cream, whatever. If you are able to fire up romance with the ex go right ahead but if she won’t have it then keep it respectful and tell her and make sure she knows your intentions with the kid. Best of luck my fiend

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Why do I constantly want to kill myself whenever I am not being productive? I cannot relax. I try to, and feel like shit.

Then when I try to relax and talk to people, my aggravation on myself shows with a shitty vibe.
I constantly am either asleep, hungry, suicidal, or bored.
It's like I am being burned alive, but cannot stop it, or needing to take a piss, but there is no toilet in a 500 miles radius.

Why the fuck does it feel like this?!
>>
>>22282506
>Why do I constantly want to kill myself whenever I am not being productive?
That's normal
Just be productive
>Why the fuck does it feel like this?!
You're just ambitious, it's good. Keep being productive.
>>
The more productive you are the more your quality of life will go up. Exercise, listen to music, clean, do whatever it takes to keep busy and tire yourself out so that you can have that “relax time “ and then it will actually feel good

I think I’m suffering from some serious fucking OCD because I obsess about literally everything.

At first I would become annoyed if my character would do something “in-immersive” (phase through a rock, float off the ground slightly etc.) but now it’s developed to the point where I obsess about how I literally click the game application. Like, if I don’t click the application twice consistently it bothers me to the point I need to restart.

I’ll be sitting through the loading screens and I’ll get random intrusive thoughts in my head about rape, murder, etc. and it totally upsets me, which in turn makes me restart the game application and try my hardest to focus on NOT thinking of this bad shit but it always ends up slipping into my brain and the cycle continues.

What should I do? Should I commit an hero?
>>
I had very bad OCD until I instilled myself with the belief “whatever happens is ultimately in my best interest” and then it went away
Also see a doctor

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How should I fix my social anxiety? I'm very anxious in situations with other people, such as the store and work if I'm on with coworkers I don't know too well. It's really starting to impact my life and I'm meant to be starting med school next year. Being anxious when I start practicing in hospitals will probably eat me alive.

Should I just bite the bullet and see a shrink? I can't very well do exposure therapy or anything if I have barely any friends and can't do anything due to the lockdown.
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>>22282529
>How should I fix my social anxiety?
Remember how it feels to be calm
Practice feeling calm deliberately
Pay attention to what your brain is doing as it tries to boot up anxiety
Overwrite whatever it's doing with that manual calm
Repeat until you build a mental habit, and your brain overwrites the anxiety with calm automatically
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>>22282529
Cognitive behavioral therapy is currently en vogue for social anxiety.
>>
>>22282529

Anxiety is perhaps the easiest negative emotion to get rid of anon. At least in my experience.

Here's the technique: You just let the anxiety come up and let yourself feel it to the maximum degree. Then it 'burns up' and goes away.

The anxiety comes from a negative energy field that you mind is attuned to. By allowing yourself to feel it totally and completely and not resisting it, the energy field eventually becomes replaced by a higher energy field of non-resistance and peacefulness.

It's really hard to explain in text but you just have to experience it. Just do this for one single day: Decide that for one day, you will let yourself feel the absolute maximum amount of fear and anxiety possible, without resisting it at all.

I did this years ago and after a few sessions it literally cured my anxiety disorder.
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>>22282551
>Anxiety is perhaps the easiest negative emotion to get rid of anon.
False. The easiest malemotion to dunk is guilt.
Anxiety is sticky because your body feels it, not just your consciousness. You can control your consciousness, but your body will still be showing anxiety symptoms.
With guilt, 100% of it is a conscious choice, and you can overwrite all of it just by remembering that you didn't do anything wrong.
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>>22282551
Also I see you do mindfulness. That is good. I hear that works well for anxiety.
Personally I do "Your emotions are a choice. Make different choices." and it works.

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I assume cigarettes aren't made with longevity in mind since the main consumers go through packs so quickly. That being said, I only want to smoke every once in a while. How long will cigarettes hold up once I've opened a pack?
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>>22282549
as someone that smokes every week or two a cigarette when I'm drunk, over the span of about a decade, my best advice is: don't buy a pack, don't buy a puff bar. Basically make it so you have to mooch when you want one, because people will tell you no and that'll be that most of the time. Most of my friends are addicted to nicotine and I never have been, because my rule when I'm sober is: if you want it, you shouldn't have it

> be me
> have all I could ever want ... except someone to share it all with
> in the past have simped a bit but learned my lesson and have a new perspective
> want a gf
> found the actual perfect girl (theoretically)
> am VERY over analytical but after 3 days still cannot think of a reason why I shouldn’t go for her
> Huston, we have a problem: have had very little interaction with her in the past
> get thinking
> relatively easy to get that interaction as we have a common friend, and that common friend is dating my best friend
> worth it to go for her?
>>
Bump
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>>22282035
> have all I could ever want ... except someone to share it all with
Then best hope you have a basement dungeon so "someone to share it with" doesn't take all your free shit, spends it on an upgrade or stores it, and then runs off to see someone different.
> worth it to go for her?
Stay calm and focused. Do not invest more emotions than you are willing to lose.

How does one find somebody online?
A very good friend of mine on discord hasn't been answering for weeks totally out of the blue (there wasn't any hint of bad blood) and I'm kinda worried about him.
At the same time I only have painfully unspecific info that you can't really google very good (assuming you can even find him online) like his first name, the two universities he's studying at (he’s in for both a degree in drawing and one in philosophy), the french graduate schools of his parents, and similar stuff.
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>>22281930
Be an e celeb
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>>22281930
Man I thought you had way less information. This should be easy. I have a few questions first. Are you retarded? How long has it been since you last talked? Are you guys good friends or acquaintances? How long have you known him and how did you meet?
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>>22281947
>How long has it been since you last talked?
We last talked 2nd of May
>Are you guys good friends or acquaintances?
Friends
>How long have you known him and how did you meet?
We had met on Omegle in early January
>>
>>22281989
I thought so. You are being a sad clingy fuck. He probably got tired of talking to you and ghosted you. My advice is to forget about him, and find a new friend in the real world who won't ditch you so easily. However if you really want to be known as a crazy person, I can help you find him.
Start by searching on Google for any pictures you might have of him. Then search his username to see if he used the same one for other social media apps. If you don't find anything from that, you're going to find the phone # of the school he's attending. Make up a fake story that made you worried for him like he told you he was feeling suicidal or something. Tell them his name and what he's studying and your phone # if they have any info.
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>>22282053
Wtf you can be undercover or something on how can try to look for the person. Impressive

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How do you start wanting to penetrate boring women with their sarlacc pit vaginas?
>>
Bi female here, honestly idk women are objects to me so I see them as something weak I guess you just gotta fap a lot

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I have no come here to ask questions. I have come here to prompt you to ask them.
This is an AMA thread, the main topic I aim for is cocaine. The wicked, monstrous powder that has ruined many.
My goal is to answer question you have about life or more specifically the above mentioned substance. Legally speaking (since 4chan has been known to crack down on illegal activities posted here) I have not, nor currently, abused cocaine or cocaine derivatives. I just want to educate people and kill some time.
Pls ask away frens, I'm bored af.
>>
>>22282476
Okay.
#1 How long from first snorting until the high kicks in?
#2 How long does the high last?
#3 Other than the burst of energy and motivation, what are the effects?
#4 Does use of amphetamines affect the way your body processes cocaine in any way?
>>
>>22282488
Alrighty
#1) It's almost immediate, like sub 1 minute for me. Part of why I think it's both easy to manage and pretty lame when people get too coked out like "Man, you know how high you are, just don't rail for a bit."
#2) Anywhere from 15 minutes to about 45 minutes based on pretty much the same things as an alchohol buzz. Weight, tolerance etc.
#3) The other affects are a surge of confidence (probably why I made this thread, jk lmao), jitters, paranoia, irritability, increased heartrate, sweating, enthusiasm, and exaggerated facial expressions. Anything along those line will be seen, but most are anecdotal cases.
#4) I don't really use amphetamines ever so I can't speak to it personally. But I know of people with a Ritalin script that emphatically dissuade the use of cocaine, I'll say as much as "If you think it's not a good idea, it's probably a really not good idea."
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>>22282498
So it's basically amphetamines, but it doesn't last as long and it doesn't make you hallucinate?
Understood.
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>>22282501
I've never experienced hallucinations personally, no. But one thing to understand is it causes a lot of physical damage to the "consumption" area. Rots your nose, intestine, vein, gums. Hard on the body. Also, it has a pronounced numbing effect on the body part it was in contact with when absorbed. Like, a finger won't feel it but you nose or gums will. It's a not very potent local anesthetic.

Hi, I’m 21 and I really want to leave Russia. Here I don’t have a future. What kept me here doesn’t hold me now. It was also strongly influenced by the fact that I was not Russian, but from the Caucasus, and it interferes with my life, they just didn’t hire me because the local population has stereotypes about people from the Caucasus.
The last couple of years, life in Russia has become even worse; there is not enough money for everything. I even smoke cigarettes in half. Now I’m sitting at home without work for the third month.
I used to think of staying here and starting a family I had a nice girl, but she was not so cute.
How can I pull myself together. Stop worrying about being abandoned to start learning English and saving up money?
Yes, and in some places I am infantile.Yes.
9 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22281705
Some people in Russia still believe that SU was great so they might have a belief that dissenters = bad.
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>>22281352
Just move to poland to clean toilets like all the ukies
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>>22281730
That is not moving, just working there. To move you need much more. Ukrainians work there for a season and return back so it is different
>>
I have a great respect for the peoples of the Caucuses, and understand the Issues in a primarily Russian society.

The first thing I would focus on is security, start gathering food.
Later on you might have to sacrifice what little income you have to look for work so you will need a decent stockpile.
Dried beans, grechka, tinned beef, hard vegetables, oil, salt, instant coffee/tea.
Just put it all in a box in case you need it later- if you don't in the end just eat is as normal.

Then I would look for work.
Reach out to the Cafkas community and tell them you want to earn enough to return to the caususes, tell them you want to work.
You might be surprised what miscellaneous assistance you might receive.
Make a resume in Russian and your own language, unfortunately I must recommend assuming a Russian name for your own resume.
If you have to use a public internet computer that is fine, but bring a folder to protect your resume from damage.
If you can email your mobile phone a digital copy tou cau use online.
Then print off some small papers advertising labouring or whatever services you can provide and put them in letter boxes.
That is what I am doing this afternoon, I get old people call about gardening or taking out heavy rubbish.

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>>22281352
Delivery seems like a very easy job to get, and a lot of eastern people do it. I don't have much other advice, what kind of career would you like? Why don't you try learning it, I believe having a skill will make it easier to leave.

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my girlfriend's depression and being down on themselves constantly attitude is really starting to get to me, no matter what I do I can't seem to make them happier

the fucked up thing is that outside of this they're a great person, and make me very happy, they have motivated me to do better in my own life, but at this point, I don't know how much longer I'm going to last if I'm being honest

however, I've always been told and read you should never blame a depressed person or make them feel bad about their depression, this is kinda fucked... how do I bring up the topic and let them know how I'm feeling? I'm a person too
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22281880
is that the best play?
>>
>>22281882
Another anon here, same situation as you.
Its the best thing you can do, really. Talk and explain the situation and how you feel. Offer to help her find a therapist, to get her help.

If she refuses, then you are kind of stuck in a relationship that is so different by the hour it will leave you exhausted
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>>22281886
>this
Don't leave her she's depressed but talk to her thoroughly
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>>22281860
>my girlfriend's depression and being down on themselves constantly attitude is really starting to get to me
Don't.
Don't give it any weight in your mind, and ignore the bad feelz.
This improves the depressed person, otherwise they will be sad about making you sad.
Also it doesn't enable any of the depressed person's sadness, because if you don't give their sadness any weight in your own mind, then the depressed person thinks "well shit, maybe my feelings aren't that valid".
> no matter what I do I can't seem to make them happier
True, but that's not your problem. That's theirs. It's their job to be happy, not yours.
You can remind them, but other than that, they're the ones that need to train their happiness. You can't train it for them.
> I don't know how much longer I'm going to last if I'm being honest
Stop investing so many emotions in the person. Just wait patiently until they stop being depresssed. Maybe enjoy their body without considering their consciousness, if you're into that.
Their consciousness is broken at the moment, and you can't fix that, so don't worry about it.
>how do I bring up the topic and let them know how I'm feeling?
Use words.
But remember that caring about a depressed person usually doubles their burden rather than halving it.
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>>22281860
It's not your place to fix her, or to make her happy.
Stand by her side, but encourage her to get proper medical help for her medical problem (a psychologist or psychiatrist).
Talk to her about any issues you have, with your words. Tell her how you feel without making her feel guilty for how you're feeling. Learn how to communicate your feelings effectively.

It's also fine to not stay with someone depressed if it's too much for you. My ex broke up with me because of my depression, and even if back then I hated him 4 years and new boyfriend later I understand why he left and just don't care about him.

i want to learn how to meditate. any anons have a good guide to help me start? i’m doing this to help me when i am anxious or restless. i dont want to get i to the meme wine mom versions of meditation either but i dont know how to tell the difference honestly.
2 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22282337

check this out:

https://youtu.be/ibpwtqFo0hk

and then this:

https://youtu.be/SxBmQpZ1lys

basically, it involves directing your attention to your breathing, or to the present moment. when you have a thought, notice it, say "oh look that's a thought, interesting" and then just gently guide your attention back to your breath or to the present.

do this for about 20 mins per day. the two lectures above will help clarify, and you'll be able to find additional simple resources online for "mindfulness meditation" (which is what this is).
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>>22282397
i cant understand the concept of nothing
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>>22282405

these will help:
>>22282404
>>
>>22282409
>>22282404
thx zebra fren i’ll give em a watch
>>
>>22282412

<3

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What's the benefit of going to uni? Anons who went to uni, what are you studying, do you regret going and what are you working in right now?

I tried going for Nursing and realized I didn't really like bio/healthcare. My next path is finance because I really like stocks and numbers, but I can't help but feel like it's a waste of time. Uni here is 3k/yr so I'm not worried about getting into debt but I just feel really anxious about spending 4 years in Uni and finding out it was a waste of time, when I could have spent that 4 years progressing in another career that didn't need a degree.

The thing I am also coming to realization is that for entry level jobs, I'm competing with people who have degrees, and I'm worried that a uni degree is basically what a highschool degree was 20 years ago.

Has anyone here felt this? What did you do?
22 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22281764
I know that's what he means. He thinks shitting out some some 3D marble rolling game in a managed language that gets 30 FPS on modern CPU is comparable to writing a 3D engine in ANSI C and i386 assembly against the limitations of an IBM PC.

>>22281770
You are obviously out of your depth, levels of abstraction is not a concept you seem to grasp. I could write a program that simulated Babbage's difference engine in a weekend, and it would mean nothing about my abilities or Babbage's and everything about the progress of technology and understanding in the years since his invention.
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>>22281801
Nice dunning Kruger syndrome bro. You're a great example of why university is necessary.

> I could write a program that simulated Babbage's difference engine in a weekend, and it would mean nothing about my abilities or Babbage's and everything about the progress of technology and understanding in the years since his invention.
Stupid fucking point. That's like saying the Wright brothers are the greatest aircraft designers of all time because they invented the first plane. Nobody else is trying to make planes so obviously he's gonna make a name for himself. My point is, it's a lot more difficult to make a career nowadays than it was back then, because now basically everyone in the fucking world is programming and you're not just competing with a few losers to make something useful.
>>
Bump
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>>22281233
>What's the benefit of going to uni?
Get to be in debt to Moishe Geldberg. Which is a good thing, because {insert Austrian school of economics here}.
>>
>>22281233
>Get a degree --> Get a better job eventually. Unless of course you study something useless
>Learn to be an adult
>Loads of freedom. As long as you get your ass to classes and pass your exams, you can do whatever the fuck you want

It was hands down the best years of my life. Of course i live in a country were higher education is free and you only have to pay for living expenses. Also everyone is eligible for a state scholarship where 40% is "free money" from the state assuming you pass your subjects and the remainder is loan, but with very kind interest rates.

How do.i beat complacency?
>>
>>22282398
You realize perfection is impossible, and that everything is a learning experience. Remember every one goes through the same thing
>>
>>22282398
>How do.i beat complacency?
Lmao who cares
>>
>>22282427
Absolutely based

How do I not give up when things get hard?
>>
grow some balls
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>>22280732
By shutting your brain off.
>>
>>22280732
You bite the bullet and endure the pain while using that pain to motivate yourself to find better, more efficient solutions to your problems. Or alternatively compromise and choose a solution you might not have considered earlier.
>>
>>22280732
watch the movie 300, everytime u feel defeated think back to leonitis and his band of 300 men. Works everytime for me, when Im working out and it feels impossible to get into a few more reps, I pretend im a spartan working out to fight persians (funny cuz im arab so id have fought for the persians prob) and it becomes easy. I suppose this works with any idea you have which makes you feel embitious but movies works the best for me. Gladiator is also another good movie for this.


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