Why am I not totally over my ex yet?It's been over 6 months since I dumped her. She had some mental health issues that caused her to treat me not so nicely and it ended up affecting my frame of mind, to the point I got tourrette's and night terrors from the stress of talking her down about her self esteem or whatever every day.But I still miss her, I remember all the things we used to do, and just this last night I had a dream about her. She was my first girlfriend after all.What's wrong with me?
What's wrong? Tourette's isn't a flu bug. You don't catch it from stress. Whst is wrong with you is that you mzke excuses for yourself. This is why you haven't grown from the life experience of letting go an unhealthy relationship. Mae West said that the best way to get over someone was to get under someone. She wasn't wrong. You need to take stock, admit your mistakes, recognize your failures, where you need to build strength of character, and resolve to do it. Failed relationships are practice, nothing more. You need more practice. You get there by building a life for yourself, a life you can enjoy. So start there. You get over failed relationships by moving on. Move on.
>>26505222You can get stress induced tourette's, mong. I was diagnosed with it>Move onThis is a very general platitude and doesn't help at all
Bump
I don’t want to do any competitive sport, martial art or group physical activity because I am 5’9 and feel inferior to bigger men. I feel like sports are a waste of time because of my size. Am I wrong or am I just not coping hard enough?
>>26505527I sit around and do nothing and i am tall
You're not even "short" per say. Average.Get in the gym and stop being a fucking bitch. Dudes that are shorter than you, considerably so, still train and can whoop ass.Prodigious size has no intrinsic merits...
>>26497131with that mindset you are going to lose before you'll even start
Dumbass..If you lose, people will still give up kudos because, like you, they perceive you to be the underdogIf you win, you get disproportionate praiseOr you could just do your best and compete for the sake of sporting, my pocket-sized lil biotch
>>26497131Cope. You might never be able to ko a 7 foot tall linebacker, but you'll sure as hell be better equipped for fights than if you were a couch potato. Get off your ass and fill out your potential
I'm drunk boyos and want to text my ex that I dumped a month ago should I do it
>>26504314I just miss her
Sure, go ahead and post back with the results.
>>26504310>>26504327Why would you? Do you genuinely miss her or are you just saying that because you're drunk?
>>26504310Do it and share the damage with us.
>>26504579I genuinely miss her buy now that I'm sober I realize I'm glad I didn't. I also had a long ass drunk dream where I was with her again and that was good enough for me
Just finished my first year in college and although I struggled with some stuff, I think it's because I was lazy. I'm doing my own study now on youtube and other sites to be more prepared for second year.Still, i'm not smart at all and so I don't know if i'm wasting my time or not..I don't plan to ever be a Google CEO, I just want your typical code monkey job that will make me enough to get by - have my own apartment, put food on the table, hobbies like the gym, vidya etc.
>>26505094I don't know if you need a high iq but I hate looking at shitty code. Don't do it if your code sucks. At least have some pride in what you do.
>>26505325>At least have some pride in what you do.Why if everyone's doing their best to find anything to tear you down?
>>26505094Code monkey you'll be fine use pomodoro teechnique when studying maybe invest in some outside courses udemy etc to get that high grade knowledge.And relax anon as long as you get the proper education and training you can do anything in life look at the pajeets.
>>26505094No. Aside from IQ not being what most people think it is (a score for tests which can only test certain aspects of intelligence like sequence recognition and inference from data sets), most of software development is a skill, which means it's something developed through practice and experience. Learn well basics - proper coding practices so your code doesn't look like shit and is optimized rather than trying to reinvent simplethings in roundabout way and then keep at it, picking up new tricks, analyzing pieces of code of skilled people - and you'll do fine even with pretty regular intelligence.
>>26505094As a software developer with about 20 years of experience, I would say that you do need at least average intelligence. But more importantly, you need to be meticulous and careful in everything you do.You need to be good at following procedures, following best practices and understanding why they are considered best, being self organized, being on time and on schedule, and being a responsible person that will feel obligated to correct his mistakes.I’d rather have someone on my team who was dumb but is consistent and follows orders and proper procedures to the letter than someone who is smart but is disorganized and just does what he wants without regard for the well-being of the whole. I’ve worked with enough of the latter in my life and I refuse to work them ever again.Be the code monkey that is reliable and trustworthy and everyone will hold you in high regard.
Hi how do I go about getting cigarettes online without buying in bulk? Is there some mysterious russian guy on an ebay knockoff site I can buy from or some shit
>>26504066muttmerica probably
>>26504118What!!!??? Are you kidding me?!!! This is absurd i thought just a couple of counties had the 21 tabacco law, my mind is blown Still can die for you country at 18 and drive a ferrari at 16...
>>26504287I agree, but don't buy cigs online. You need an ID and if you use your parents' ID and they find out you can get in serious trouble. Wait until you are 21 like everyone else.
>>26501380Don't smoke
>>26501380No idea of any website that would allow you to do it. You'd probably be better off just paying some homeless dude to buy them for you.
I (24f) and my husband (28m) just got married and he's been unemployed for ~12 months. He left his job so we could move cities for my job. I'm doing really well and got a massive promotion recently. We are fairly Trad and always wanted kids right after we got married before my ovaries shrivel up. He seems to completely lack any prudence and is unwilling to find work that's "not in his career". I am supporting us and we are barely affording our mortgage as is. He expects us to take advantage of my maternity leave, dwindle down our savings, and then go and live with his grandparents if I don't go back to work. Is it that much to ask to spend a year with my baby? We always thought I would be a SAHM. There is no way I'm leaving my baby but we don't have any financial options. I don't want to go back to wageslaving and don't want to move in with parents/grandparents. I don't want to delay having kids.Have I just fucked up in my choice of partner? I just feel so much resentment. Every time I get him a contact to network for a job, he passes it off. He won't persist and he can't support us and he is actively spending money drawing down our savings. What do I do?
>>26505221You sound like an awful person who crushed someones else dream for your own lukewarm dream. I hope the decision sinks you and you become 30 years old and single
WHY ISN'T MY HUSBAND MAKING MONEY. I WANT TO STAY AT HOME MUM IT!>I don't want>I don't want>I don't wantyou ain't entitled to shit except death. Also you don't love your husband lol nice work
I hope all men on here who desperately want gf’s/wives read this post and internalize it lmao.
>>26505112Get fucked roastie, welcome to the 24/7/365 of being a man.
>>26505221You are guilty. Now he'll never know what you know, and will always think what his lige would be like had he managed to pursue his dream job unlike you.
In a positive or even negative way...
>>26503108Of Cosmogonic Eros — Ludwig KlagesPositive change
Shantaram
>>26503108>On women, sex, etcThe Book of Pook>On decision makingAntifragile>Influenced my current worldview the mostIndustrial Society and its FutureThe Technological Society
>>26503108Every young man on this board needs to read The Bible and Jordan Peterson.
>>26503108The New Testament, and to a lesser degree The Autobiography of Malcolm X.
My buddy and I are fighting because he feels I'm a boomer for thinking it's easy for any reasonably intelligent person to get a six figure job. I want /adv/'s perspective on who is right.For context--We're both in our late twenties. I make about 150k as a consultant in financial services, whereas he's struggled since graduating to hold down a job and was a househusband to his now ex-wife for a while. I think overall we had equal advantages in life. We're both tall white guys with a 130+ IQ, he's better looking but I have a deeper voice. We both have a Philosophy degree from a mid-ranking uni. His family is very rich, mine is lower middle class. My parents were more involved than his (i.e. I got much better coaching on how to interview), but he grew up with a better friend group and richer life experiences, and was less weird and autistic as a result. Also, his dad paid for his college whereas I had to go into debt. My position is that so long as you can stick to a plan, anyone can be comfortably middle class in 5 years, and any smart person can make six figs. It's a matter of doing the research as to what pays well, getting the credentials, and showing up until an opportunity emerges. Obv you need luck for any success in life, but you have to pass a threshold of merit to even stand a chance at getting lucky, and over time the proportion of success attributable to luck approaches zero. Who is rich at 23 is 90% luck, but who is rich at 30 is 90% merit/agency and 10% luck.His position is that he hasn't been successful because of bad luck and an economy that doesn't offer as many opportunities as in the past. I think he's partially right (2010s labor market was def bad), but that if you're unlucky over 5 years it's your fault. He's had a few decent entry-level jobs he quit because of some perceived indignity, or was fired from due to what seems like carelessness to me. I think with a different attitude he would easily be making six figs by now.Who is more right?
>>26499914>they produce tons of value that isn't economicagreed>and requires a high IQ degree.requires a serious education, roughly to the caliber you'd get taking a high IQ major in college. You can also learn all of that online for free pirating textbooks and just studying by yourself. OP is not a retard, he's just doing a poor job of communicating his frustration with a world where people cognitively capable of earning $100k+ are making $15/hour at Starbucks and demanding student loan forgiveness, that people who pay a higher tax rate like OP will foot the bill for, even though many of the same people demanding it could pay their own student loans off pretty easily if they simply subverted their entire cognitive faculties towards income maximization.
>>26497639Honestly this, the most successful ppl I've met were motherfuckers who just stuck to it for years to the point their seniority carries them now.
Most of what is being described is survivorship bias. Not everybody can do what you did, just because it was simple for you it doesn't mean it would be simple for anybody else. I agree that being rich at a young age requires more 'luck' than being rich at 30+ where the impact of choices become more apparent, but that survivorship bias also becomes compounded, look at anybody struggling to break out of retail roles in their 20's for example. Work is compulsory for many and it takes up the majority of your time and energy so once you are in something you tend to be stuck in something without the freedom and opportunity to take risks and explore other options. Once you hit 30 something your die is generally cast too, it can be extremely difficult to get an employer to take your agenda seriously and why would they pick somebody with no experience over somebody with experience? If it was so easy to earn over 100k surely more than 9% of the working population would do so?
>>26502957>OP is not a retard, he's just doing a poor job of communicating his frustration with a world where people cognitively capable of earning $100k+ are making $15/hour at Starbucks and demanding student loan forgiveness, that people who pay a higher tax rate like OP will foot the bill for, even though many of the same people demanding it could pay their own student loans off pretty easily if they simply subverted their entire cognitive faculties towards income maximization.total student loan forgiveness and the political movement around it is stupid but just giving everyone 1 free attempt at a degree at a state school is obviously superior to our student loan system and what every other developed nation realizes is a much better system
>>26497598>USA>mean income $67k>mean iq 98 you are educated, you know the statements you made are incorrect. stop being so disingenuous
How do I identify high value women?
>>26497834Coomers
>>26494299you browse the agencies website
>>26494299They are Ph. D.s or Ph. D. students or have a job in STEM.
>>26494327Don't go after stuck up bitches anon. Focus instead of finding high quality woman.
>>26494299pic not related obviously
I know it's a cliche at this point but what are the chances for a >21yo>6'1>Decent looking (been flirted with before)>Working a shitty manual labor jobTo find a girl that doesn't have a "diverse" dating experience? Even back in school all our girls used to change a bf at least once a year and in college in was norm to just fuck random people like it's nothing.It's kinda sad.
>>26505227I don't know you, but probably. How can you have those stats and doubt yourself? Get out there
>>26505289I dont think his stats are good enough
>>26504887Yeah feel you man. Everyone basic understanding of men knows this. People call you incel for it. Not getting married is an option too just make sure you don't get resentful of women just because you don't find them viable partners. No one is owed anything in this life that is one thing we have to learn.
>>26505235>miles of Chad cock before yours.Most women fuck 5/10 normies and Chads barely exist.
>>26504965I feel you bro. Parents are from Eastern Europe too.That world is gone now. Just gotta try to live in the present and accept it.
I really thought she was the one. I tried to do everything right. Tried to be the perfect boyfriend. There was nothing I could have done better because I literally tried my best. And still it wasn't enough. I was her first and she wanted to "enjoy her youth" and "didn't want to be tied down so early".I am 100% sure she will regret it, but it will be too late. It hurts so fucking much, to do your best and still to not be enough. I have the looks, the money, I have many good friends, girls want me, my life is going in the best direction it has ever been, and still all I can think of is her prefering the "freedom" of getting used by random dudes she meets going out over the life I could have been able to give her next to me.I just want to find someone who I can trust and love, who I can share my life with, who I can build a family with, and just thinking about the possibility of going all over this again makes my heart sink in a deep hole full of darkness and pain.How can I feel hope again when I tried my best and still failed? The more women I meet, the more women I have sex with and the more women I get to know, the more I feel disgusted by them. I just feel as if even if I feel love again, I will not be able to forget the horrible things they have done to me or to other people with me.Is this really how life is? Do I really have to manipulate and use them to get what I want and just forget about a real meaningful and lasting relationship like the whole redpill community says?
Wasn't as meaningful as you thought if she left you for "freedom". You've obviously learned what you do like, and you know what a real connection feels like to you. Yes you will find it again, don't be an asshole, don't become jaded, don't become desperate, don't get weird. All of these are easy to become and they will be your fault, not hers. Consider therapy to get you out of this mindset faster; or if you choose to go through this funk alone create a reminder for yourself that if you find your personality slipping to go see a professional. Yes she will regret this if you truly are as perfect as you claim to be. No, don't take her back, don't even talk to her. You don't know who she's been riding since y'all split.
Enjoying youth is a rookie mistake. Life is not compatible with carefree, careless hedonism.
>>26500867Embrace the blackpill
>>26500867Welcome to hell
>>26500867This stuff hurts like a bitch, but it'll get better, even if you don't want it to. In the end all of your relations, money and material goods can be lost in the blink of an eye, and you'll be left with yourself. Make sure that you can live with that, and nothing will get you to capitulate.It's going to suck for a while though, but you gotta tough it out.
I'm a womanask me anything
>>26500386got some life hacks for a dude?
>>26502253No way
>>26500386Are you a woman?
>>26500386Woman, why aren't you interested in me?
>>26500386Why do you think I care?
How do you shake the feeling everyone around you would be better off if you were dead? I feel like a leech. I've got no drive and I don't even like being alive. I vividly imagine living any other life I can think of as a coping mechanism. I feel empty at my best and utterly parasitic at my worst.
If a girl you like says she's not interested in you but offers to be friends, should you be friends or just walk away?
>>26505611Yeah, so you're a shit who's barely anyone's acquaintance but far from friend, surrounded by other shits who are in similar manner. I mean you get what you all deserve but that doesn't make me wrong.
>>26501873Sometimes, the best way to deal with a crush is to get to know her. And realize she's not that image you had in your head. Had this happen twice, one girlie thought was perfect actually cheated on her bf multiple times, and bragged to me about it. Another, after years of knowing her and thinking of how smart she was, found out she was easily swayed with whatever everyone else was doing. She just did a lot of drugs. Go for it anon, and learn just exactly who she really is
>>26505685This is so randomly hostile and assumptions. I have a friend group of like 8 people and we hang out literally daily during throughout the semester. I just also know a ton of people I don't see as often.You're not even responding to my points your just assigning me all these character traits you think I have based on two sentences.If a girl tells you she wants to be just friends 99% of the time they're just being nice you fucking idiot they don't actually want to be friends.
>>26505732>This is so randomly hostile and assumptions>proceeds with hostile answer making assumptions about what the other anon believes about girlsYou two chuckles are fucking worth each other.
>>26501873walk away
I have a problem probbably. Im at collage and have a gf from high school for like one and a hlaf year. She is quite pretty, is loyal, knows how to cook, caring, good with children etc. but she is dumb af. Like I have to use lowest form of humor around her so she gets it (she is somehow in collage too). We dont have much in common, she is like really vanilla. I dont even find her attractive most of the time now (wasnt problem then). Im bit afraid to break up w her, our family members are friends, but quite often I found myself thinking when we are together (Wow how can she be this simple). All we do together is watching Marvel movies and really simple comedies cuz she would not get any satirical humor and she thinks it is stupid. Any advice? Should I end it now or will it be better overtime when I get used to it? Like I like her desu but Im not sure I love her.
>>26505694we dont have blcks in my country
>>26505671sounds like you want someone to tell you to end it. I'd say end it and itll be better for both of you in long run
>>26505726I DO A LIL BIT OF TRAVALIN N SHIT BVLL SLAVE! YOU CAN CALL ME A XPAT AND SHIT
I'd say make sure this isn't a hangup with you first and it isn't the lense through which you are viewing the relationship otherwise you'll leave her for nothing, don't compare her to others and don't focus on what you don't have but rather what you do have
>>26505671That's what any break up will feel like. If you never leave her, ever, that means you two will eventually get married and spend the rest of your life together.You're young, relationships don't mean anything that young.
