[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vm / vmg / vr / vrpg / vst / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / pw / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / vt / wsg / wsr / x / xs] [Settings] [Search] [Mobile] [Home]
Settings Mobile Home
/adv/ - Advice

4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
[Hide] [Show All]

[Advertise on 4chan]

[Catalog] [Archive]

File: 1701499432866211.jpg (131 KB, 1080x1424)
131 KB
131 KB JPG
You're better off without

File: electrified rat.jpg (107 KB, 840x1024)
107 KB
107 KB JPG
How to cope with overthinking and unwanted thoughts?

Every day I make lists in my head and can't feel at ease until I've listed everything. And if I forget one item on the list, I feel forced to begin again, and widen the scope of the lists every time.
Writing them down doesn't help.


>"how can I solve everything in my life"
Stuff like what do I need to do, long-term & short-term goals, stuff to clean up or install on my PC, things to do around the house. Basically how do I get to a state where I am fully satisfied with what I have and can move forward, eliminating the backlog.
Problem being that obviously, with just one day of rest a week, this list is never fully accomplished in real life, and keeps getting longer as stuff gets done.

>"why is my life so shit"
There I just list what I could have done in life, down to minute details, and the different outcomes. Missed chances with women I liked and who gave me chances that I never took, missed experiences, missed chances to have better relations with family, college or job opportunities wasted.

Context: I have been depressed, lazy and disorganized for years.

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
(OP pic unrelated)

The worst thing about this being that I always tell myself "do the list one more time, and then go on with your day/life", which obviously never happens.

Part of it is, I guess, to cope with imperfection and the flow of life, but I've been battling with those thoughts for a year or more and I just can't do it.
>in my head
Uuh, write them down? If you keep thinking the same shit over and over again and wasting a shitton of time on that, just write them down, and whenever you think of that shit look at what you wrote down to remind you of where you stand. If its tasks then do a checklist, just tick boxes if you did something, and check it to see what you have left. If you don't want to write shit physically just use a notes app on your phone.
Nothing inherently long with lists and stuff, but if its all bottled up in your head of course it'll impede on your day to day life.
I do write them down, but they keep coming back to me and I play them again in my head, almost compulsively, to find out if I didn't miss anything or if there's another angle.
It's also mundane shit sometimes. Like I wrote, "did I do my morning routine correctly", etc. I can't be spontaneous anymore, since everything is defined by routines and I would consider myself out of line if I did anything unplanned or that I didn't think through.
Hi OP, I'm struggling to understand how you are disorganised and lazy but have routines which I assume help you get things done. Are the routines helpful to you?

I think routines can be great to make yourself do something regularly, but they can take all spontaneity out of your life if you let them. I think you should allow yourself to occasionally relax on some days and pick up the routines again the next day.

One final point, I think you need to do better recognising the difference between tasks to do for now or the immediate future, and thoughts about what to do in life for the long term future. I think you're not always getting stuff done today because you're putting too much time and attention into the long term future stuff.

File: 1700961267698219.jpg (115 KB, 736x919)
115 KB
115 KB JPG
How do I find a GF that looks like picrel? I'm in my 20s
19 replies omitted. Click here to view.
literally everywhere
>in my 20s
>29 y.o
gtfo millenialcuck
its called working out together
>its called working out together
She looks like Silva Zoldyk.

im low iq, i went to school, took 7 years to graduate and almost failed, wasted my intern opportunities, learned no skills, have thousands in debt have no job and will have no money in 2 months, ive been applying for positions for a year with either no response or i get an interview and then they pick someone else
i have no future but if you say that everyone says "no you have to keep trying" but why?
im prepared to kill myself once i run out of cash
35 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Well, software development is a skill, for example.
One always has oportunity for growing, and learning as well.
It is sometimes said that matters more what we learn, than what we know.
I can recommend you some valuable books, if you please.
ive been trying
im not even any good at making software
Well, I guess one could always be better at something. And feel a bit under the roof when considering one's own limitations. And even, see the roof somewhat higher depending on the day.
I encourage you to keep a positive outlook.

These matters tend to be more complex than speaking about talent. Maybe also more than some skills.

Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod can be valuable.
Moonwalking with Einstein by Joshua Foer
Fluent Forever, by Gabriel Wyner
These two can be interesting.

I'd also recommend the gospel, it is always a good one.

God loves you
Did you have a girlfriend? If so, don't ask for any pity from me, you can kill yourself for all I care

Not to sound like im jerking myself off but I am a very pretty girl. I have never been rejected, never been told I was ugly irl, and never had an issue pursuing whoever and whatever I want whenever I want. I have an hourglass figure and strangers & friends always say to me that i have the nicest figure or that they wish they looked like me. I put hours every day into my looks because they mean the world to me. All of these blessings have allowed me to glide through life relatively easy even during the rough times. I feel that this has made me extremely vain. A genuinely bad person (not on some edgy shit, because i WANT to be and try to be good). I want to be a better girlfriend to my lover and the more time we spend together the more I realize that I have no real character development and simply leech off others personalities, jokes, qualities, etc. I do what I believe is best to be a good gf (cook, clean, constant sex, gifts, saying ily) but it feels so fake. i KNOW i seriously love him and want to have his children but I cant shake the feeling of not being real. I want to give him a real girl and sometimes feel that its too late for me to be anything outside my looks. Of course i try and can continue to try but its been 6 years and no matter what i do i cant shake the feeling that im the biggest scammer. He is my 2nd real boyfriend ever so its not like im some fried hoe who is incapable of pair bonding either. I feel that if i was uglier i wouldnt feel this way but i feel like thats so selfish to say because i mightve had the same issue regardless? Do other people feel like they are a complete fraud in your relationship no matter what you do? And if so what helped you move past this horrible gut feeling? I think about it all the time especially when we kiss. it makes me feel hideous.
37 replies and 3 images omitted. Click here to view.
yo wtf? can ppl edit your comments or am i tweaking??
You sound like a good gf. You have some kind of impostor complex but there's nothing wrong with not being Ms. Giant Personality. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being pretty and quiet/introverted. Your bf has been w/ you 6 years. Sounds like he's not fretting over it either. Best of luck to you.
Come to /atoga/ with us where you can ask guys and gals and shitpost and chill

File: 1626123163309.jpg (142 KB, 720x764)
142 KB
142 KB JPG
Convince me life is worth living, seriously try to sell me on life in general. I'm going to bed soon, but I'll be up in like 6-14 hours to check in and refute your pitch.
9 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
I appreciate I wasn't born into a 3rd world shithole, that doesn't mean I wouldn't rather have not been born to begin with.

The only tits and pussy I get to experience is my cat watching the birds.

fuckin nerd

>goals aspirations purpose passion
buzzword buzzword buzzword buzzword

I really like drinking and shitposting on 4chan. I mean not really, but I guess it beats stewing in my own perpetual anger and anxiety. I don't like to use the word depression because most people seem to think that's a temporary thing, whearas whatever the fuck I got is non stop and doesn't just pass with time.
It's just a game bro. You can play it many ways. And if you decide you don't want to play that is ok too.
You will be back though, you are an eternal soul having a physical experience.

Some say that if you do certain things then you might not have to come back.
There is no “one reason for living”, you’ve gotta find your own reason, and that’s really hard. It took me years to find my reason to stay alive.
My “reason” is a mix of two separate reasons:
My family, it would be too selfish to off myself because it would forever affect my sibling and mother (the only people who have ever cared for me, and they don’t deserve to be hurt like that).
And the small joys of life, like good music, friendly animals, your favorite foods, hobbies, naps, the rain, coming up with good ideas, jokes that make you laugh till you cry. Just the silly little, often overlooked things that make life bearable even when it feels like there’s no point in living.
Charles Bukowski was an accomplished author and radio host and lots of things throughout his professional career - being a frogNEET is certainly not one of them.
Oh I guess that completely invalidates this direct quote from him then

You should call him up and tell him hes a fucking moron that you had to correct by telling him about his own life

Is it that likely to get humanitarian work like engineers without borders as an electrical engineer? Anyone do it or something similar? did you like it?

If there’s a better board to ask please tell me. Thanks

File: roped.jpg (50 KB, 645x1260)
50 KB
>girl from friend group asks me out
>meet up with her
>immediately realize that I have absolutely *NOTHING* to talk about
>she asks me icebreaker questions and I give her one word answers because my mind goes completely blank
>literally say about 2 words every 5 minutes
>after the most excruciatingly painful hour and a bit, I excuse myself to go home to spare us both the pain.

I knew I was boring and anxious, but I never knew it was this bad. I think i'm broken on a fundamental level due to bad experiences growing up and locking myself in my bedroom to shitpost on 4chan.

I'm 22. What the fuck am I meant to do?
25 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
you need more experience that's all. if you want to try and salvage this you can text her that you were a bit anxious or whatever, her being cool with this depends on what type of a person she is
I don't think she actually wanted sex desu.

this happened a while ago. We met up again but I sperged out too and now she's fucking someone else.
File: schooler skinner.jpg (117 KB, 500x713)
117 KB
117 KB JPG
You need to quit your job and go back to school so you can talk to her about school.
we're both schoolers but we're not the same school

File: 1673119756626860.png (235 KB, 648x500)
235 KB
235 KB PNG
How do I conquer the world?
10 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
I'm 5'9'' but I don't believe in basing my choices on statistics

No in English pls
*Now in English
Bumping this worthless thread,
I already conquered the world so you cant do it
Also, keep an eye on your AE and pick Admin Ideas for that juicy, juicy core cost reduction.

File: proxy-image.jpg (11 KB, 474x266)
11 KB
i have adhd but i dont want to take any drug to reduce it is there any other way around?
14 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
take your meds, you need them more than OP
this is so true and so based
try general practice physician. i do something completely different every 20 minutes and never get bored (and get paid $150/hr to do it)
why do you believe this?

I like technology is there something like this that I could do with tech
This, to a degree.
I simply will-powered my way out of depression.
Its possible. Not easy, but entirely possible.

File: download (1).jpg (9 KB, 286x176)
9 KB
I am being torn between studying German and Chinese for a requirement of my college. By the end of the course I'll be supposed to have reached B2 level in German or possibly A2 in Chinese.
Now, if i take up German I'll have great chances of doing my internship in Germany and possibly settling there (not something I've been drooling over, but it could be a sweet turnout nevertheless);
If I do Chinese I'll probably be able to travel to China, but career-wise it's plain nothin'.
Learning a language is a toilsome thing and I don't want it to overtake my life and dictate the movement of my daily life.

In the long (within my uni years) run german looks menacingly hard. Chinese, on the other hand, is something I'm sorta excited and open to trying out. It just feels that I'll have more fun with it than with German.

What should I do?
10 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Poland, English philology
But you aren't a european citizen??
No sir
Last chance bump

File: 1681580129933770.png (246 KB, 470x246)
246 KB
246 KB PNG
How do I get over being lonely even though I have all my affairs in order, a loving wife the rest of my family even lives right next door to me, I have no debts and everything in my life is going great by any metric it seems, but I still sometimes get cold and clammy or I worry about how no matter what I do I am going to die one day and nothing will ever stop it, or I might lose everyone before I get there

I just get bummed out about that shit and it's more often than I would like to bear
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
I tell myself we all have to die so the slate gets wiped clean and the youth can experience life. Imagine if every rich asshole dickhead could live forever with their accrued wealth and knowledge, no one would ever have a chance. It's good that we die, you have to die, why worry about nature. Just have life insurance, life will find a way.
I reccomend moving in a tranny or ethot to spice up your marriage/life
>How do I get over being lonely even though I have all my affairs in order, a loving wife

Please kindly go fuck yourself man. You don’t get sympathy when you already have everything. Please fuck right off. People like you are never satisfied and just continue to ask for more.
Get into hotwifing, send your wife over to me, I'm on a bit of a drystreak right now.
Grass is always greener

File: EjQY9O0UYAAcyW5.jpg (47 KB, 719x797)
47 KB
I cheated on my girlfriend by saving one of her friend's picture on my phone
she found out, i admitted it no excuses, apologized and then we broke up.
She still suffers and hurt mentally because of it and i want to make it right for her, any advice?
I know we're not related anymore but i regret and feel remorseful about it and i really want to make it right for her
20 replies omitted. Click here to view.
saving her friend's pics is pretty weird when you're in a relationship don't
ya think? i agree on the latter
A bit creepy and kinda dumb on your part, but, but not cheating.
I'll be charitable and consider it's more personal I guess, but still not to the point of breaking up.
Whenever I see an anon saying they’re too dumb to get a gf from now on, I’ll refer them to this thread
OP is dumb as shit.
Shitty thing to do to keep reminding you of how you fucked up just to torment you as a revenge when you apologized and tried your best to let her move on.

File: 1684752242978334.jpg (7 KB, 250x250)
7 KB
How do you dwelve further on a topic? I keep asking questions about different things for which she gives me one word responses, neither do I know what to say.
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
monitoring thread, I heard destiny refer to this as a tree shape where you kind of go deeper into topics and her opinions with a conversation, but he didnt really explain how exactly
Your comment leaves much to be desired
About into what topics?
Whos ‘she’? You mom? Sister? Coworker? SO?
What is your objective; to have meaningful conversation, to learn, something else?
What do you not know what to say/continue upon?
She's a random girl I added on snapchat, I talked to her for practice. I asked about her hobbies she said she has none, then I asked her if she likes tiktok she said "haha yes".
I keep asking random questions until something sticks but I never know what to say
Well, for starters, you’re in the wrong place looking for meaningful and deep conversation. You don’t get much more surface level than snaphos.
That said, it’s evident shes retarded or has little desire to converse further. Having ‘0’ hobbies or interests is essentially impossible.
I see other people talking to brainless girls, how they do it?

Am I going to look like a complete fucking idiot if I buy this thing?
21 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
how do you split your time betwen car and rocket? when will mars be fluid?
lol I wonder what the second generation is going to look like in a few years. is it going to have more polygons? is it going to look like a normal truck?
This thing gets dented super easy. There is a reason why cars are not built like this with these weird angles. The paneling will not be aligned properly and look weird.

Also, Elon is kind of a cringelord now and everyone will think your just a fanboy worshiping a billionaire lolcow.
What kind of sick, deranged person would even contemplate buying a car like that?

[Advertise on 4chan]

Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.