[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vm / vmg / vr / vrpg / vst / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / pw / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / vt / wsg / wsr / x / xs] [Settings] [Search] [Mobile] [Home]
Board
Settings Mobile Home
/adv/ - Advice

Name
Options
Subject
Comment
Verification
4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
File
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
[Hide] [Show All]


[Advertise on 4chan]

[Catalog] [Archive]

I'm too black to fit in with whites, but I'm too white to fit in with blacks. How do I come to accept this?
21 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
Very simple. Get half decent at public speaking and come out as a conservative. White idiots will fall over themselves to be around you.

You could also go for "based black guy" and name the J. It's a riskier path, but has the potential of actually being a leader of your people and earning respect from the toughest Whites.
>>
>>30956876
Get a vasectomy.
>>
>>30956876
Do sports. You might be the next Mahomes or Steph Curry
>>
>>30956876
That is not a thing that actually happens.
Enjoy your replies
>>
>>30968715
>That is not a thing that actually happens.
Yes, yes it is. If you grow up in white negihborhoods it happens.

File: mebrainonporn.jpg (257 KB, 1080x1278)
257 KB
257 KB JPG
Is it bad to go back to a job that you quit six months ago?
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30965579
Dicks
>>
KEK
What's Squidward doing in Spongebob's pants??
>>
>>30966717
kinky shit
>>
kek
>>
>>30966726
>>30966717
get your minds out of the gutter
squidward just needed a pair of pants
and spongebob had an extra pair laying around

Is there something remotely like going on an epic, magical training arc that requires immense effort from you, and coming back stronger, with all of your life together, and a gf and lots of friends just like in the movies?
4 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30968676
Ain't nothing magical about have your body mind and spirit destroyed for the empire
>>
>>30968684
You’ll make friends, come back stronger (I guess by technicality) and with government benefits!
>>
>>30968633

The hero's journey is a condensed, grandiose version of what you're supposed to do over and over throughout real life.

You're supposed to make mistakes and learn from them. Meet insurmountable odds and overcome them. Improve and humble yourself continuously. Normal people learn these things as children and get practice at it. Stop sitting on your ass waiting for life to begin, it began the moment you became conscious at 2-4 years old. You're just waiting it.
>>
>>30968728

This. That's why the hero's journey is one of the oldest story arcs and is most relatable by audiences. Everyone experiences the heros journey themselves in daily life.
>>
There is such a thing, nearly down to the letter, with one difference: there is no guarantee that your efforts will be rewarded. Certainly, the path you take will not be the one you expected. We can only walk that path blindly.

It's a fairly broad question, but how do you manage stress?

If it hasn't actually worked for you I don't want to hear it, the endless parroting of achedemic pseudo-science halts any real progress in our community. Stick to what you know, your own lived experience.
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30967697
This! Oh, and meditation/prayer. Finding a way to center yourself mentally is so, so nice.
>>
>>30968742
But I have actual responsibilities that I can't drop, so many responsibilities.
The consequences of taking a back seat would be catastrophic
>>
>>30967663
What sort of stress we talking about? My go-to:
>sleep
>take a walk or jog til my legs/lungs hurt (a healthier self harm/punishment method for getting myself in such a position)
>no more coffee or caffeine (spikes blood pressure and anxiety)
>make plans for all scenarios and possible outcomes
>eventually accept it’s beyond my control and try to treat myself/give up trying to resolve things or care about it (preserved for chaotic stress instances)
>>
>>30968771
it is futile to worry about things you can't control, just do the best you can
be realistic with your expectations, you aren't god
>>
>>30968779
While I can't "control" things that doesn't get me off the hook.

File: 1680079533950051.jpg (406 KB, 1242x925)
406 KB
406 KB JPG
I am 37/m from Italy and since the war broke out in Ukraine, I can't stop thinking that everything is going in the direction of a global scale conflict, possibly even a nuclear one. I am on the verge of literally just closing my life here to go somewhere in the middle of nowhere far from this shithole, but I have a loving gf here, which couldn't follow me.
What do I chose in this situation?
Being somewhere far from her makes me sick, and dying togheter with bombs or nukes or whatever it is, knowing that we could have done something, also makes me sick.
13 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30965568
you aren't white.
>>
>>30963322
You need some good wine, bro. Things will be okay. Even if things aren't okay they will be okay. Just don't be retarded and you will be fine.
>>
>>30963322
You may wish to consider “sphere of influence”. My dad taught me the concept; your sphere of influence encapsulates the people and/or groups you can make change. If you’re not sure what your sphere of influence is, then examine the people in your life and ask “How much could I hurt this person?” Then flip that question around. “How much could I help this person?” I hope that’s helpful.
>>
>>30963322
I know exactly how you feel, except get this, I live in Estonia. If the conflict between east and the west even gets a little bit going, I'll be the first to get fucked. Like even if it's true that Russia can't take on Nato, my country will still be the ground zero for whatever kind of conflict it will be. So clearly I am stressed the fuck out every day, and when the news get really bad, I suffer from panic attack, cry and consider suicide.
>>
>>30965441
>Oh no! Now i have to pay 30% more for bread! How horrible! I think the world is ending! :(
This but unironically
everything is so fucking expensive now

So im an artist, and a woman i love art etc etc
I dont feel aroused from NSFW art at least i dont think so but i really love bara art i just thinks its so cool? Like especially when its really intimidating and mean looking people i just get this WOAH THIS IS AWESOME feeling and i also get this feeling of wanting to be them but im not trans nor do i want to be a dude (although i have thought in the past that i would be cooler as a guy because i would look more terrifying rather than the more cutesy way i dress but i also like the way i dress so do with that as you will)

Maybe i should start drawing buff men more being beat up ? With big massive swingin cocks that i also think is cool? What do i do?? I really dont know if im attracted to it too i get a cute feeling but thats it but its mainly a cool badass feeling
I do like hairy men tho if thay counts
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
File: 1684254479609100.png (612 KB, 677x586)
612 KB
612 KB PNG
idk what you're saying but yes
barafaggism is based
keep drawing bara
>>
>>30965873
These barafag art never look intimidating or mean, looks like someone’s hipster dad in bear mode. Tumblr shit. Cool men art is stuff like metal gear solid or any fighting game art. Anyway it’s normal, I was like you but with better taste and probably showered more.
>>
Nick Mullen had pointed this out so I'm not claiming this is original insight, but basically if you were born 1985-95 everything in pop culture was telling you how the coolest guys alive all had the aesthetic of Tom of Finland characters. Not for anything gay, but just how awesome the parties and dive bars they go to would be.
>>
>but im not trans nor do i want to be a dude
I believe the second part but not the first.
>>
>>30965873
>I like byff men
Wow, a woman with a conventional taste in man

File: 1708413119951568.jpg (73 KB, 770x576)
73 KB
73 KB JPG
4chan chads, whats it like being lusted after physically and having raw animal lustful sexo.. or being able to hit on hundreds of girls with them occasionally responding with more than lol or k
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30968657
fpbp
>>
>>30968609
>whats it like being lusted after physically and having raw animal lustful sexo
It's cool although I'm in a committed relationship so the sexo is just with the one
>>
I used to look alright, and a dude so it happened rarely, but 99% of the time when you get lusted after it's from someone you would find weird or disgusting. Mainly old people, the obese, perverts, homos, etc. It's just the law of averages, the majority of the population is gross.
>>
>>30968609
On a physical level, I'm a Chad. People say I look like an 8, I'm tall, and am slowly getting buffer. Women either look at me or ignore me. Nothing changes. I'm not getting any sex either way, and I realized that woman will never approach you in any way even if you're hot. They probably only would if you're famous but still. If you're not an 8 just practice approaching. Most couples I see are uggo guys with better looking girls. The real r9k rot is realizing not a lot actually changes once you looksmaxx and a lot of shit is truely in your head.
>>
>>30968609
pretty girls smile at me on the street and i smile back at them, but its not like anything ever happens. its like when you see some guy on the street and you give him a slight nod and he nods back. it was literally nothing. ive had chicks take my phone and put their number into it and then put a heart emoji next to it and then told me to call them sometime but i never bothered. im still autistic so it really doesnt even matter if they make the first move. looks only get you so far, the fat guy with a bold personality will get way more chicks than the boring good looking guy.

File: fallout.png (1.13 MB, 1572x1053)
1.13 MB
1.13 MB PNG
Been going through a lot in my life lately born in 95' mother did what she could to keep me safe and fed but barely got time to do mom work. woke at 5am came from work at 20 on the bus. father even living 20 minutes from me never cared, never showed up to the few birthdays i had these 28 years. growing up with schizophrenia, being a wierd nerdy kid wasnt easy made some friends. got bullied everywhere ive gone, even when i thought it was gonna be over i was bullied at work. repressed by being gay by my sister when i was a kid i repressed it untill 20 something. mom passed away october 7th 22:15 saw her lying dead at the memorial before getting inbto the coffin, didnt have ceremony, we just went to the burial, died of lung cancer, last time i heard her voice and spoke to her, the meds they put her in were too strong so she was delirious. didnt remember my name. told me to go away and leave alone. that was the last time i saw her before the induced coma, then i just held her hand when i visited her until she passed away. my sister cant get over that she passed away, she also lost her father 4 months ago. been trying to suicide, took her to the hospital many many times bleed from her wrists into the trauma room, things have been tough i have both schizophrenia and depression, think about suicide often these days, no only thought but been really making detailed plans. if i died i wish the afterlife would be nothing. no soul. no thoughts.
i just wish i ceased to exist. but theres another force within me that knows im capable of many things. of making friends,
9 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30964526
Ride it out. You have all of eternity to sleep, when things are done. You have a power that some most will never possess.
>>
>>30964946
sorry im ESL can you be more clear, im so sorry.!
>>
>>30964547
The worms might be causing you to be gay. That is how they reproduce. Deworming wont hurt.
>>
File: sXkXSmd.jpg (622 KB, 1382x789)
622 KB
622 KB JPG
>>30964526

I came back from the hospital. spoke the psychiatrist but at the end didnt stay there. not because of fear. but because i realized what i longed for was elsewhere not in that hospital ward. not in my room. not on this pc. not in the internet. i want to be loved. i want to feel proud of myself and feel accomplished, feel like i mean something. but first i gotta start with myself. loving myself, instead of seeking outside approval and love. thanks to everyone who posted here, even the ones making fun of me being gay. hope you guys do well in life, and no matter what happens. never give up. its never too late to change a begin a new life. im starting an art course april 1.
>>
>>30966390
thank you

File: DTgMxusV4AAxbA9.jpg (201 KB, 1200x896)
201 KB
201 KB JPG
My guy and I (both in our late 20s) have been seeing each other for a year now. But even after all this time and despite being exclusive, our relationship is still fairly casual. He says he can't commit to something more serious right now because he's too busy with work and life. I would like to think he'll eventually be able to give me more but am I being naive in believing that? Am I just a placeholder til someone better comes along?
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30968100
>Spending a year on this
You should've let this go at most like half a year, then you should've left.
>>
>>30968100
If you aren’t married, it isn’t committed, and you are willingly taking on 100% of the risk of him taking you for granted. Tons of women fall into this trap out of naïveté and hopefulness, letting noncommittal guys waste away their youth.

>>30968586
Yes, especially if you made the mistake of giving him sex or paying his bills. Some guys just like the attention, but I can’t imagine he would strong you along without sex/money to show for it.
>>
>>30968100
Listen, married guy here. I made one mistake before wedding, the one mistake of my life: Didn‘t ask her if she‘d be ok that I might come to the point in my life when I want to f*** other women, just for fun/live my sexuality. Because it was already clear back then.

Your guy doesn‘t want to commit because he doesn‘t have the balls to tell you what might come. And he doesn‘t want to be fixed and pressed into something he maybe never comes out again without damage.
Solve it with one serious talk. It‘s about sexuality and freedom, nothing else.
>>
>>30968100
don't be abuse drugs
>>
>>30968586
I went out with a girl for a year and a half and I didn't even like her that much. It was just convenient. So, yes. It's a conversation you should have with him.

>>30968625
This seems like a pretty tenuous projection.

File: IMG_4077.jpg (165 KB, 750x950)
165 KB
165 KB JPG
I have no respect for myself. It's taken me such a long time to realize it. I realized it's probably the reason people don't want to be my friend. Or why I can't get a relationship further than the first date. I haven't taken time to properly shave and get a haircut in half a year. I haven't changed my wardrobe in 4 years. The clothes I wear are whatever capeshit I like, whatever I think normies wear, and my workplace uniform. I eat like shit. Don't take care of my health in anyway. I let people walk all over me. Set myself on fire to keep other people warm. All the while staying at my parents at 25 years because I'm too much of a bitch to get a real job to move out. Because I'm too much of a pussy to learn to drive. I have no aspirations other than making it another day without conflict, eating a meal i can't afford, and jacking off until i fall asleep. I'm such a coward and a weak faggot.
>>
Transition or do literally anything about all the issues you've identified.
There's no TikTok life hack for basic, effective habit building. At a certain point you just have to fucking do something.
>>
Just do anything but transition
>>
What steps have you made towards forgiving your mother and returning to your father?
>>
>>30968465
>I have no respect for myself

Okay well stop talking about yourself like this vvv
>I'm too much of a bitch
>I'm too much of a pussy
>I'm such a coward
>weak faggot

This is a self-defeating mindset. Be kinder to yourself. Find what makes you happy and use that to give yourself direction. You can't navigate towards a better life just by running away from what you have.
>>
>>30968465
Most people solve that by trying to feel how they SHOULD, instead of mindlessly repeating what they currently do.

File: IMG_7955.jpg (48 KB, 710x432)
48 KB
48 KB JPG
I want to be clear that I'm giving advice, not asking advice.

I see a lot of posts and comments around here where guys are desperate for a woman's touch because they think that it means they "made it". Or even worse, I have seen some comments of guys saying that the only sexual experiences that they have had are with prostitutes.

Fellas, having a women be attracted to you isn't a mark of success; it's the bare minimum. And likewise, having sex isn't a mark of success either; even losers procreate (and quite often!), and especially not if you had to pay someone to do it with you.

You are successful if you can get a home, keep a job with a good income, keep a marriage (until death), and raise children without turning them into losers or psychopaths. You won't find out until the end of your life whether or not you have "made it", it's a tall hill to climb, but it is oh so worth it.

So stop worrying out about losing your virginity or whatever it is. Clean yourself up! Shave and bathe daily (you can grow facial hair if you want but keep it tidy! None of this caterpillar neckbeard shit), and for the love of God figure out how to dress yourself. Find a women who you like as a best friend and ask her to marry you. Have A LOT of kids. Take them to church on Sunday mornings. Make sure to dedicate lots of time to your family, don't just spend all of your time and money on your hobbies. If you don't like your job it's alright, success is marked by providing for your family, not how high you climb up on the company ladder (when in doubt, listen to that Boston song).

You can do it, but first you gotta lay off the coomer shit and focus on straightening yourself up. Come on fellas, you've got this.
11 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30965702
Try harder in your appearance (gym) or lower your expectations.

Those are your only two options.
>>
File: 2F5.jpg (77 KB, 680x907)
77 KB
77 KB JPG
>>30965301
Being married and having children would be great to a kind hearted woman with a good soul, modest, well raised, soft spoken, loving and pretty.
Sadly only about 1% of the women are like this nowadays and they get scooped up fast in high school and college.
>>
File: IMG_8371.jpg (154 KB, 1200x1200)
154 KB
154 KB JPG
>>30965389
lol
>>
>>30966383
I am white, really tall, not obese and take care of my hygiene. my standards have been lowered a lot over the years. A white female thats 18-24 and no obese, doesn't have tattoos or piercings. If it was a female I want to marry she has to be a virgin like me.
>>
>>30965301
Sounds boring. And the church thing, f*** you, sorry.

File: Untitled.jpg (9 KB, 194x182)
9 KB
9 KB JPG
Where I am at the average salary is 50k, I make 45k and get free insurance and pto monthly and 20 days a year. I will be working there for a year starting June.

I really like the job and I have 6 hours of downtime working 9 to 5.
My questions is should I switch jobs after another couple years or stay? Last guy before me worked there 5 years. It is an IT job by the way.
>>
>>30968313
I don't get why you want to leave, you sound happy
>>
>>30968345
The last guy before me said he switched jobs and it getting 45k more than before, so I am assuming 90k. I eventually want to get more money. The only problem is there are little to no IT jobs near me. I would have to go to the power plant 30 minutes away. I just know all my peers are also leaving and switching jobs. Not sure when it would be smart to leave or stay. Looking for others perspective.
>>
>>30968356
Wow that's almost double. Now I get why you're asking
>>
6 hrs downtime and you're not playing doom?
>>
you only get to jobhop when you're young, so do as much as possible! there will be plenty of time to be ambivalent about your job when you're 54 and doing whatever because if you get fired your only option is Walmart until you get social security

it's like dating girls, you have to do it with a lot of different ones to figure out what you really can't tolerate

Anons I don't understand /adv/. Literally every thread you post regarding a problem you have and are seeking advice for it, 98 percent of posts are not advice at all and seek to just bully and criticize you. How is any of this helpful? Why does anyone actually come here?
10 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30968108
If you don't like people getting annoyed with you, Howie, then maybe you should try actually doing some of the advice you've been given over the past six months rather than dismissing it all and constantly reposting the same thing. People are sick and tired of you, and they have every right to be.
>>
>>30968410
>People are sick and tired of you
That's not true. I see people who have legitimate problems posting for the first time and are clearly in a weakened position and they just get excessively bullied and criticized all under the guise of "tough love".

That's literally kicking someone while they are down.
>>
>>30968193
I can't promise I have good advice but my discord is charftown. I won't bully you
>>
File: 1711593373399928.jpg (49 KB, 400x400)
49 KB
49 KB JPG
>>30968176
STOP BULLYING ME YOU FUCKING RETARD FUCK OFF
ahahaha moron
Here, have a drink
>>
>>30968108
This board does have a bit of an incel problem (and also a “people calling anyone they disagree with an incel” problem), but the only uniformly negative threads tend to be over situations that the OP clearly got themselves into, through their own malice or stupidity.

File: IMG_3616.png (10 KB, 300x250)
10 KB
10 KB PNG
>be me
>20m UK closeted bisexual
>drinking with friends at someone’s house for hours
>we are all very drunk
>time to sleep
>sitting on upstairs living room floor next to a guy friend who is outwardly very homophobic and masculine but also basically an incel
>can’t remember how it was initiated but we start holding hands in the dark
>continue holding hands in the dark while talking to others in the room
>we squeeze each other’s hand while holding them together and I use my thumb to rub the outside of his hand
>without clearly thinking I stop holding his hand and start massaging his head
>he doesnt react negatively at all and we continue talking to the others in the room while i rub his head in the dark
>go back to holding hands
>i decide to leave the room and sleep downstairs

I know that this situation was pretty much me not suppressing my sexuality due to the influence of alcohol, but what does it say about the other guy??

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>
>>30968607
Autistic.
>>
>>30968607
Rape him

I know a lot of people will say this is a larp, but I don't care as long as at least one person reads it.
Basically, I've been CRAZY in love with a fictional character for **4** years.
>Be me female
>Grow up in a good family, had normal childhood

Basically 4 years ago I watched that ((anime)) and fell madly in love with that ((character)).
I was immediately in love. I started thinking about him every day, hour, minute. I dreamed of him. I bought a dildo just so I could imagine I'm having sex with him. I masturbate more than ever and I have strange sexual fantasies about him. Not long after that I bought a lot of figures and posters with his character. My mobile wallpaper is his picture. My gallery is (full) of his pictures. I carry a small picture of him in my wallet. I started to daydream about our life together. I used to spend hours reading fanfictions about him. I draw us together everyday and imagine fake scenarios together. If I saw another woman online who also have a crush on him, I cry in agony. Soon realized that he is not real and never will be. After this, I entered a phase of depression and even became suicidal.
Honestly, I'd kill my entire family just to make him real.
When real men ask me for a date, I refuse. I have never loved anyone this much. And I don't think I ever will...

Why is this happening? What is causing this? Why doesn't it stop after 4 years? Will it ever stop? Do you think I should do something about this or should I just continue living like this. What do you think this is? Will I ever have a normal life? Am I normal?
10 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>30967954
They are putting something in our water.
>>
>>30968237
>But..I don't want to have schizophrenia..
then tulpas aren't for you

As for what to do idk I'm stupid don't ask me. You just have to hope someone useful comes along in this thread. Though yes, a psychiatrist seems like the most logical thing to do, they're professionals--or supposed to be
>>
>>30968614
>Though yes, a psychiatrist seems like the most logical thing to do, they're professionals--or supposed to be
And what are they going to tell me??
To unlove him??
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vKsajX_AujU
My husbando mirrion times bettuh
>>
>>30968632
I don't know do I look like a psychiatrist to you? lol
They're supposed to know what they're doing so by the end of it you should be 'fixed'


[Advertise on 4chan]

Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.