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Im a depressed, empty shell of the happy kid I used to be. I do nothing but vidya and shitposting in my freetime, of which I have too much. The things I used to love, like anime and reading, bring me no joy. Being touched by women sends me into a panic, and being alone with them makes me deeply uncomfortable. I think about killing myself most days, just to be done with it all.

I think I know why I'm like this. My whole life, I've been bullied and abused by the people closest to me. I've been set up to fall down by my "friends" all my life. I've been beaten physically, manipulated, emotionally abused, and slandered. Most of the relationships I've had ended with me being abused. And I let it all happen to me because I thought I deserved it.

I'm trying to get better. I've found a hobby in lego building (I have a lego star destroyer that I think is pretty neat). I started working out but the habit didn't stick. I have antidepressants and antianxiety meds that I take, but I don't like how they make me feel that much.

How do I heal? Where do I go from here? I just want a comfy life and a nice boyfriend to cuddle (I wholeheartedly believe i will never be comfortable with women).
>>
>>22259120
bump because I'm in a similar boat to OP
>>
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>>22259285
thanks anon. I wish I could get some advise. I dont know how to get better, but I want to.

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Why did I have to make mistake? I did my best trying to avoid it, and instead I made a big one. No, I don't know back then. Why didn't I know it back then? Why didn't I have the knowledge? Fuck my life.

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>18
>parents tell me to enter a uni.
>friend of cousin tells me to apply for SWATs in the army.
>another friend of cousin tells me to stay permanent on army.

>if i enter a uni (highly unlikely) i wont be able to get out cause the subjects will be definitely harder.
>if i dont enter a uni i will still get a job but with lower salary.

i cant decide and every day i get told something else. im 18 and im self taught in computers. my parents believe in me with false hopes. my mind is blurry.
>>
If you are white don’t join the army.

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Is it possible to change someone who doesn't want to change?

Is it better to threaten your partner with dumping him/her if s/he doesn't do better or just be cruel to be kind and ditch them and move out with zero warning?
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22259151
If he refuses, it's a fundamental incompatibility, as there's no middle ground between your stances. You have three choices with those:

>one of you sucks it up. One of you accepts defeat from this point on, and either he makes an effort despite his desire to refuse, or you stop caring that he makes no effort in the space

>You mitigate the problem by coming up with a solution that roundabout ends the problem (eg, if the problem is "he won't ever clean the garage", you two hire a maid explicitly to do that job, now it doesn't matter if he's not cleaning)

>You break up

Pick one of the above
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>>22259163
In general. My father died out of spite, because mom tried to get him to get help. She kept coming up with different ways to try to coerce him to get psychiatric help, and he kept coming up with ways to say "no, fuck you", until it killed him. I was 17 when he died and my only regret is that he didn't die sooner.

I've tried to show my boyfriend that it is possible to improve one's life by fixing a few little things every day and making it a routine to care for and maintain the good things in life, and his response is roughly "nah".
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>>22259075
>Is it possible to change someone who doesn't want to change?
No.

Rule #1 - don't date people you don't like. If you want to change your partner radically, you shouldn't be with them to begin with. Have standards.

Communication goes a long way. My boyfriend improved in certain areas because he knew he was upsetting me.
If communication doesn't work, just leave.
>>
>>22259123
>How do you tell someone to become a person who continuously makes effort at self-improvement, if leading by example and showing how I do it has not worked?
You don't. Date someone who does it, or accept that he's not like you.
You're not in a build a boyfriend store, you either fundamentally accept the man you chose or move on to someone else.
>>
>>22259184

> In general. My father died out of spite, because mom tried to get him to get help. She kept coming up with different ways to try to coerce him to get psychiatric help, and he kept coming up with ways to say "no, fuck you", until it killed him. I was 17 when he died and my only regret is that he didn't die sooner.

My father was a son of a bitch too, so I get it. But it sounds like you're doing with this guy what your mother did with your father. Do yourself a favor and learn from her mistakes. All men aren't your father. Some do actually want to improve and communicate.

> I've tried to show my boyfriend that it is possible to improve one's life by fixing a few little things every day and making it a routine to care for and maintain the good things in life, and his response is roughly "nah".

He's just not paying attention or simply doesn't care to improve...and it's selfish to expect him to. Is this really what you want to be spending your time doing with the person you're dedicating your time and attention to?

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I have no friends
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
me neither, fren
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>>22258922
It's a dick move, invites conflict into your life, and even if it works, it's a big red flag that it did, because your turn's next to get cheated on. Wouldn't recommend

>>22258916
>>22258926
>>22258929
Use science: you can't make friends unless you're spending time with people, the SAME people, a lot.

>Building deeper friendships may be largely a matter of putting in time.
>A recent study out of the University of Kansas found that it takes about 50 hours of socializing to go from acquaintance to casual friend,
>an additional 40 hours to become a “real” friend,
>and a total of 200 hours to become a close friend

If all you do is play videogames at home in your room, this is probably why this is a problem from you. Get out of your hours, go find a group interested in something you care about, and don't give up when you realize it's not trivial to get started.
>>
>>22259060
27 year old loaner here.

All easier said than done. I don't communicate well. I'm severely depressed and the only thing that interests me now is killing myself. Constantly takes up all of my thoughts.
> Driving to work counting the numbers of storeys of buildings knowing I need 10 to kill myself.
> lying awake at night thinking about ideal places to hang myself
> Seeing if its possible to rent a gun from a shooting range and shoot myself instead of the target.

No one wants to be friends with that. I never talk about this though. I'm just silent and thinking.
>>
>>22258916
Cool story bro.

...So what's your question?
>>
>>22259203
>I don't communicate well
Many spaces don't care, and this is also a function of lack of practice.

>I'm severely depressed
A lack of social interaction or friends will do that. You're assuming the problem is depression -> no friends, but having casually known a shockingly large number of depressed people, many times they had it backwards and once they had a friend or two recovery was pretty smooth, even from those points.

Not a guarantee, but I encourage you to give it a try. That plus a consistent sleep schedule and exercise routine, and a good psych has worked for something like 7 of 10 depressed people I knew

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I think I have premature ejaculation. How do I fix this or do I even need to?
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
rip
>>
>>22259076
>Train with masturbation to last longer.
I'll try that, thanks.
>See a doc if shit's out of control.
Usually I last about a minute, not sure how bad that is. Id rather avoid seeing a doctor because that's really embarrassing...
>>
>>22259095
What I do for training:
>Masturbate and see how long you last without letting peepee go soft.
>Keep it at a 6~7/10, where 7 is aroused but controled and 9 makes you ejaculate sooner or later inevitably.
>Never fap the old way again. This is a fapping re-education.
>Train until you can hold for at least 10 min.

The idea is that you disassociate fapping with the desire to cum.
Fap because fapping is fun, if you cum too soon the fun is over.
>>
>>22259126
Oh, I thought you meant edging.

>The idea is that you disassociate fapping with the desire to cum.
I think that might have been my problem because masturbation doesent feel good for me.
>>
>>22259182
Yeah try enjoying the act more.
Beware of that 9/10 arorusal tho, it's a point of no return. You WILL cum the second you touch your dick again.

Edging would be that 9 over a long time, which doesn't help with much aside from being a fetish.
It's way preferable to get to know that 6 to 7 window where you are hard as brick but in control of the situation.

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Texasfag here. I got a message from the unemployment office, telling me that it's time to request payment, except I apparently still haven't been approved for unemployment benefits yet. Anyone know what to do? What happens if I request payment now?
>>
Bump.

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How do I give up the thrill of chasing new girls forever?

I have a loyal gf who I get along with and love dearly. But we are coming upon 3 years together and she wants to get married, whereas I am still yearning to explore my sexuality with other women.

I tried to suggest a 3some and she has been a little open to the idea, but her feelings got hurt when I tried to actually push for it to happen in real life instead of just fantasy.

I just can't get over the fact that I never slept around as a kid because I had social anxiety and other mental issues. Now I'm in my 30's and got over all those problems and feel like I could sleep around easily but my relationship is in the way. But of course, I don't want to lose the gf I love.

Has anyone ever solved this problem *without* destroying their relationship or living in disappointment forever?
14 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
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the point of life isn't to have sex it's to have children you freak. do you see yourself raising successful children to carry on the linage on which your parents, grandparents, great-grand-parents and all forefathers have bestowed upon you?
>>
>>22256816

Sex with random people isn't really that enjoyable. Monogamous sex is much much better. What you have is great, you're suffering from a 'grass is greener' fallacy. Cut out your porn, or whatever trash is glamorizing this in your mind and learn to appreciate what you have.
>>
I can't wait to see the thread pop up a week or two from now with OP crying about how he fucked up and lost the love of his life. Like clockwork.
>>
>>22256850
Well this is the situation your in dumbfuck it’s one or the other
>>
Honestly, both parties are bound to get hurt in this situation regardless of what option you choose, so might as well go with the option that will bring the most pleasure, you don't wanna loose a relationship that could be with the one, but at the same time you don't wanna be stuck in a relationship you're not happy in, tough shit.

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>Have GF
>Meet another girl and get close over months
>End up making out with her in bed
>Almost fuck her
>Next day, get cold feet and own up to her that I have GF
>She is pissed that she was the 'other girl', but says that given my enduring relationship difficulty it is a fuck up/mistake
>Now am more pissed about having chickened out than having cheated

How bad am I (1/10)?
What would you have done?
>>
just break up with your gfl m8 holy shit

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ6IsqekoaZrK8MeA6OYElA

This guy has made 36 videos about the same thing. It's getting really trite.

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I'm from the middle of nowhere country and have absolutely no success with girls. I thought I was undesirable, but now I think the problem may be location. I'm visiting a friend in a nice city and was checking out a cute girl and she actually flirted back a bit. Looking around, most people here are dirty (USA) and I do dress nice, have a lot of money, (problem is I'm 5'4). Did 4chan just fry my brain on how much it really takes to get a girl? I seriously thought you have to be a 6ft Chad to even lock eyes w/ an attractive woman?
>>
Well yes exposure is like 80-90% of how to get a girl. They need to know you exist for you to even have a chance. So if you live in bumfuck nowhere or you don't interact with women regularly you'll stay single.
>>
>>22259055
>Did 4chan just fry my brain on how much it really takes to get a girl? I seriously thought you have to be a 6ft Chad to even lock eyes w/ an attractive woman?
Yes and no. Yes because if you expose yourself to enough women, statistically you will eventually run into someone who's match, even if you're short or have some other disadvantage. No because many of the incels who propagate this myth that women are impossible to get are so disadvantaged in social skills and agreeableness on top of whatever physical disadvantages they have, that the number of women they would have to meet to find a match is much higher yet they cannot because they are incapable of that volume of social interaction.
>>
>>22259080
I don't really get out much, but I'm moving to a big city in a couple months thankfully. I genuinely enjoy being sociable so hopefully I can turn this around.
>>22259081
Usually I find women impossible, but once I'm actually outside socializing I can escape my head. I can't wait to move to a nice city (already found a roommate who is a cute girl).
>>
>>22259116
Good luck my friend, you have the right attitude to make it. Be careful with having a relationship or potentially drama with someone you depend on for rent. Other than that have fun!

How can I not smell like weed after smoking? I smoke after work but I still live at home. I’ve been thinking about just using a one hitter and zeroing it like 3-4 times down the street from my house before I come home.
4 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22258912
Your car will stink. You put it in something airtight, put that thing in something airtight, hope the car doesn't get too warm, and hope for the best.

Also don't forget to keep gum on hand your breath WILL smell like weed.
>>
>>22258912
I have a $60 (maybe $70 for the new 2020 model iirc) dynavap, which is basically a one hitter that roasts the bud instead of burning it. it smells, but you're only vaping terpenes and cannabinoids so like 30% by weight rather than putting nearly 100% of the bud in the air, and vapour isn't as heavy or obviously tarry as smoke so it doesn't stick to things or linger in the air. it also gets you much higher by virtue of not destroying thca with excessive heat so you can smoke less and create less volatiles in the air too. it smells a bit more than an open grinder of dank but nowhere near as noticeable or disagreeable as smoke.
>>
>>22258969
Damn. $60 isn’t all that much I just wanted to avoid investing that much into smoking until I move out
>>
>>22259012
I feel you dude, jazz cabbage is expensive enough as it is. I find I use about half of what I did per month before switching to vapour so it paid for itself very quickly but now I sesh about twice as a week with long tolerance/clarity breaks and find it difficult to finish an eighth in under a month and a half so how long it will pay for itself in varies significantly. it's much easier on your lungs though so I think its worth looking into eventually if you don't expect to be dead by 40.
>>
>>22259110
Bro my tolerance is pathetic. 2-4 one hitter hits gets me to a 5/10 lmao. I could make an 8th last 2 months

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What can I do to fix my handwriting?
6 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>22257812
>Hand writing is an indicator of intelligence
Get a load of this cope.
>>
>>22257812

>bad handwriting is an indicator for intelligence.

Then medical professionals are absolute imbeciles that treat us.

>>22257792

Avem tendinta de a ne freca scrisul cu timpul fiindca idiotii care dicteaza nu sunt in stare sa dicteze intr-un anumit mod, poti incerca ceva exercitii cred ca vei gasi pe net eu personal n-am rabdare.
>>
>>22257817
>>22257984
funny how it's basically Latin with alot more 'ul's
can op translate?
>>22257792
your handwriting is fine desu
>>
>>22257997
"The elasticity of demand based on income denotes the way in which the demand for a particular good fluctuates based on the consumers' income.
Scriptural money is money belonging to economic establishments or to a physical or judicial person, deposited into the accounts of banks and financial institutions in various forms.
Shares represent the right to property of a fraction of a joint-stock company's capital and give the right to partake in benefits and losses in proportion to the share"
Just some random things I transcribed from a textbook that came in handy.
>>
Use lined paper retard

I'm in a long distance relationship. I am 26 female and boyfriend is 32.

It was recently a budy of his' birthday and the guy rented out a penthouse and got naked waitresses to serve them drinks all night.

When he got home at 11pm he told me that there were naked waitresses straight from england (he is Australian) and they kept asking him tax questions (so obviously he spoke to them enough to learn that he is a tax practitioner). He says they had really good boob jobs.

Clearly had a few drinks in even though he said he would not drink.

He suggests we watch something together on discord. Mentions woman is hot in the movie.

He is always telling me how attractive other people are.

Would you be upset?
>>
yeah buddy
Give your bf a high five for me
Tell him “Congrats from a brotha”
>>
>>22259071
>long distance relationship
Ahahahahahahah
Look bitch, he already dipped his dick in a bunch of pussies.
You can try denying that, but hey, can't verify if you can taste some stranger's pussy on his dick over skype.
>>
>>22259093

/thread. Even if he isn't cheating, you don't have a bf. You have a guy who uses you for comfort when he is bored.
>>
>>22259071
The fair thing to do would be to watch movies with hot guys and tell him how hot they are.

I remember we watched Drive now the other night and I mentioned the lead could do better than a woman with a child and a husband that's in jail.

He took the time to say " HE IS ACTUALLY REALLY AVERAGE LOOKING. ESPECIALLY FOR A CELEBRITY"
>>
>>22259108
While you say this he does make a lot of time for me and he hardly goes out. Despite the 7 hour time difference.

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I feel down and depressed. I need something that can give me a burst of happiness that won't make me feel hollow after.
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>22257863
Go walk 3 miles in some nature.
>>
>>22257863

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU
>>
nvm. i'm just sleepy
>>
>>22257863
This thing always helps me :

https://mega.nz/folder/C7ZwlY4L#DP4JwX2dJWJdmjxbB7b7Lw

I hope you get better anon no matter who you are or where you are from.
>>
>>22257863
A nice mixed drink and walk thru trees at sunset


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