So what, if you run into one of these things and it decides to attack you, you're just fucked? You die, end of story? How is that fair?
>>4782993sex
skill issue
>>4782993you can set your pike against the ground and break the charge
>>4782993They are one of the most docile and easily tameable of all the big cats second only to cheetahs
>>4782993>NOOOOOOOO I DON'T WANT TO PROVIDE A BIG CAT AND XER FAMILY WITH FOOD!!!!!God forbid you do something useful with your life for once.
>>4782993>[insert any animal] runs into a human and he just decides to shoot it, it's just fucked? It dies, end of story? How is that fair?
>>4782993A literal scardy cat.Screams at you, does fake pounces at you, gives you every chance to fuck off.If it attacks you, you are the culprit
finger in pooper
They're called mountain teddies for a reason, you know.
>>4782993No, not really. Cougars are on the lower end of the ‘wildcat that will fuck your shit up’ spectrum. You’ll probably be hurt pretty bad, but they aren’t so big or strong that your chances of survival are zero, that would be the case of say, a lion or a tiger.
>>4783047they're also called 40-something odd other names, too, you know
>>4782993>>4783048This, basically.Keep its claws and teeth from your neck, and you will probably survive the encounter. If you are a decently fit adult male, you can likely overpower it, or at least compete with it athletically, enough to be too much of a nuisance for it to want to continue the fight.As always, keep a good knife with you at all times while in the woods, and you can kill or drive off 99% of what might attack you. Ideally, a fixed blade knife with finger holds to prevent it being knocked from your grip.
>>4783047>They're called mountain teddies for a reasonuh weren't they called horny middleaged woman at some point
>>4782993A little scratch behind the ear will tame all aggression
they usually aren't going to mess with you unless you get near their cubs
>>4782993I heard the cougar population is getting out of hand so much that cougars are now starting to pack with each other.
>>4783075>or at least compete with it athleticallythe fuck am I gonna do, challenge it to a game of basketball?
>>4784104has anyone tried this? maybe you're onto something
>>4782993Not at all, people successfully fight them off all the time because they don't stick around to finish prey that fights back. They wound, retreat and wait for you to die- but we have cell phones and are often in groups, so rescue is likely. Almost nobody dies to cougars as a result.
>>4784146except when, you know, they don't
>>4782993>How is that fair?Hah, nature doesn't care about 'fair.'Unless you've got a gun or knife you're probably screwed, alot of people couldn't hande a 100 pound dog going at them, let alone an apex predator.
>>4782994Lol
>>4784231They're like Spanish fighting bulls in that regard. Once they defeat a human they start seeking them out. That lion probably killed before.
>>4782993Why are you walking around in nature defenseless after millions of years evolving pic related to create weapons and coordinate large groups with?You're screwed, sure, and so is a lone wolf in africa, because wolves didn't evolve to be alone in africa.
>>4784393>That lion probably killed before.doubt it. that was earlier in the year and was california's first fatal mountain lion attack in 20 years.
>>4784283>thumbs upKek He knew what was up
>>4784139yes I tried it they have a mean dunk game don’t challenge them unless you play regularly
>>4784393>They're like Spanish fighting bulls in that regard. Once they defeat a human they start seeking them out.Don't spanish always kill the bull tho? Like even if a bull rips apart every matador they throw at him they will just gang up on it with lances in hispanic manlet rage?
>>4784451not always
>>4784104Out grapple it. Humans are great at grappling, felines are okay at it, canines are awful at it. Its why grown men can fight off wolves.
>>4783001What if you forget your pike at home and all you have is your morningstar?
>>4784100i'm gonna need a source
>>4782994Yea but you gotta make sure they're really full first. Then if she's in heat you can whip out your dick and she'll smell your pheromones and realize you're male
>>4784394You're right... I am so cucked by the government bros
>>4783041This. If you get attacked by one, you are 100% at fault. All you have to do is make eye contact and it runs away because it's an ambush hunter.
>>4784451>>4785699>>4784393>Slowly torture and animal to death like subhuman Demons>Get surprised when it unleashes its hatred upon a mob of peopleHumans are the actual villains of the world and we're dumb enough to deny it.
>>4782993>How is that fair?Since when is life fair?
>>4784451It's not actually meant to be a fight, it's a drama. Bulls that kill are generally sent to pasture, sometimes they are euthenized sometimes not, regardless they are not to be put into the ring again. Americans are so funny, one man cannot fight a bull even with a sword. Whole point of preceding acts is to tire the neck muscle to make it possible to place in the sword between the shoulder blade to kill cleanly. Even then it is dangerous of course, maybe you think a bull weighs little because you can lift a burger in your goblin's paws?
>>4786176So you just torture a bull for drama while dressed up like Liberace? Why are spaniards?
>>4786199Bull is treated very well before he comes in the arena so he becomes strong. Usually he gets to breed. He has got a lot of adrenaline and gets illusion of victory when horses leave. Proper placed sword hits his heart and he dies very quickly. Meat is given to community. Better than rotting in factory barn eating shit until he becomes meat globules to clog burger arteries. Now go watch action movie where famous mutt shoots fifty people but the nipples are censored house dog.
>>4786205I'm not even an american you fucking manlet moorish rapebaby.
>>4786205>>4786176>obsessed
>>4786208You may as well be since it seems you love amerikwan sensibility so much. No appreciation of art or history maybe you would be better off over there among intelligence peers.
>>4786216Art and history? Nigger, you literaly dress like fags and pester an animal until it dies. It's something a bunch of drunk gypsies would do. But then again your people's contribution to the world was having the most inbreed kings and pissing away fortunes build on colonial empire. So yeah, I can see how you would see pestering a cow "high culture".
>>4786222Half of your penis is gone used to create wrinkle cream lol.
>>4786225Can you read, or do I have to translate it to that arabized latin you call language? I'm not american you converso retard.
>>4786199a atheist crying about animal suffering.hilarious.
>Annoy big moo until big moo die, that what me call high culture>t. grog bigstick the big man in village who hunt many big moo
>>4786216He's indian which is why he views cattle as sacred animals, hindus like him worship cows
>>4786291>ESL>crying about le colonialsIt makes sense.
good morning sars do not poke the cows please sar vishnu not please!
>>4782993According to the 90's California public school system you're supposed to stand on your tip toes and raise your arms up to look taller. Even as a little shit I knew that would not work.
>>4782993
>>4786243>atheistWhere did you got that from you faggot? Oh, yes. Poking bulls to death as weird ritual animal sacrifice. Very fucking Christian. I don't remember when Jesus ordered apostles to dress like male prostitutes and pester cattle. But it might be in the palmarian bible.
>>4786205what is all this gibberish
>>4786322>>4786291You absolute arab mutt, had you noticed the continent your peninsula sticks out of like a tumor? You'd be amazed that no one here cares much for your bushmen bullshit. This isn't /pol/, you aren't getting asspats from your fellow brown people.
38you need to take more english lessons before you get any more (you)s raj
>>4784104hey that's not a bad idea to be honest, imagine just whipping a 360 in front of a cougar and it looks at you in complete disbelief>>4782993i have the secret techniques called head pats and fire
>>4782993It's still the deadliest animal in America.
>>4787042Wild mammal, perhapsmost dangerous mammal period after humans is the pitbull
>>4787046Who would win in a fight, a mountain lion or a pitbull?
>>4787059It depends if the mountain lion has time to prepare
>>4787059Mountain Lion needs one good swipe and that’s about it
>>4782993And foreigners are always going on about the dangers of australian wildlife... Obviously it varies with region, but I'd be terrified of camping in the US with cougars and bears around.
Mountain lions are legitimately not a match for an adult human maleYou will get scratched up all over but it should be easy enough to strangle
>>4787327We should import a breeding population of Cheetahs.They'd probably fair better in the outback since:> Its relatively similar to their native environment> There's an abundance of potential prey animals> There are relatively few competitors which would be capable of stealing kills from it (Dingos, and aboriginals).
>>4787360If you can keep it from biting you at most it can do superficial damage with its claws. They only weigh around 120 pounds. Their main prey is rabbits and baby deer, they would have no idea how to deal with a human and no stamina for a fight longer than a few seconds. It could definitely break a bone or leave a nasty gash but one solid hit to the face and it'd give up and run. It's not even>I could beat up a gorillatier tough guy shit they just are not dangerous to a healthy adult male (XY) of normal height.
>>4785806Does this actually work?
>>4787663Gorillas are pussies irl
>>4783047Wouldn’t mountain teddies be better applied to bears? Seems like it’s wasted on a cat.
>>4787792What? They’d tear you apart dude
>>4786205Ignore the faggots, anon.I get you.Literal cucks>BROWN, BROWN, HE'S BROWN HAHA>let me go and huff my cat's toxo / dog's tapeworms from when they rubbed their assholes on my pillow
>>4786222Lemme guess, you're a Northern Euro?I only ever get that smug attitude from Danes / Swedes / Nordics, occasionally Germans / Belgians.>>4786428Are you the above poster, or a different one?Where are you from?
>>4788036Could you be so kind and be brown somewhere else?
>>4787914Not if you're actually fit and can lift their weight 350lbs
>>4788496The fuck does lifting have to do with fighting? Are you gonna approach an angry ape and pick it up like the fucking triforce?
>>4788496>not if you’re well above the standard of physical fitness gorillas could lift way, way more than that
>>4786414So do normies ACTUALLY dance to pick people up or like what? Do people ACTUALLY do it in some weird form of courtship?
>>4783075these fucks can kill ELK with their bare hands, the fucks timmy gonna do?
>>4788503That's true, you'd have to be a trained fighter but I'm sure a heavy weight MMA fighter could take on a gorilla and win
>>4788564Shoot it? Not a hard concept
>>4788610