For 10 years I've gone to doctors, psychiatrists, and therapy, and none of them have managed to make any progress on my mental illness -- I've been on 12+ pills and none did a thing. So I'm left to solve this myself. Don't tell me to see another doctor because that's not going to work. Fortunately, I've collected a number of probable hints toward a solution.What I discover is that if I do some intense cardio and then drink coffee + eat while in front of a fan, my symptoms reduce. Most people have told me it's simply the cardio producing the beneficial effect. But if I remove *any* of these 4 elements from the equation, the reduction in symptoms is vastly weaker. So in practice, I need to do very intense cardio, drink a bunch of coffee, eat a bunch (esp carbs), and stick my face close into the fan. Only then will I notice major reduction in symptoms. The positive effects disappear by the next day, but maybe it's because I jerk off before bed.You may say this is hypoxia, and that I'm simply getting high. That's a natural conclusion. But I've accidentally triggered hypoxia in myself while doing this and the symptoms are completely different. During hypoxia I get tingles in my face and groin & feel light-headed/dizzy, but none of that occurs when things go correctly, I simply get a reduction in my illness symptoms with no side effects. Drinking a ton of coffee + eating a lot of carbs is unhealthy. It's also expensive and tiring. I'm hoping to find the mechanism behind this improvement so I can actually do it everyday. If you have any ideas, I would really appreciate your suggestions.
you sure do seem to like talking about yourself on social media
>>16164745Spam
>>16164735Something something cardiovascular.What are the symptoms?
>>16164831The main symptom is obviously an excessive urge to start shit threads on /sci/.
>>16164831Can't feel pleasure or emotions in the brain.This will sound pseudo-scientific since I don't have the language to describe this properly. But any feeling which originates in the body such as fear or sexual pleasure still works fine, while any feeling originating in the brain no longer works. My brain sort of feels like a piece of rubber 24/7, or like a stone, and when the symptoms are improving I can begin to feel activity up there again, as if the lights are turning back on in a dark building. What actually changes when the symptoms improve varies. Sometimes I regain my sense of smell, sometimes colors are brighter, usually I begin to enjoy music again (to varying degrees). Masturbation feels better. Either way, the effects are usually minor and only when I exert tons of effort do the symptoms decrease a significant amount. And it all resets by the next day.
>>16164735have you tried a lower carb diet and anti inflammation supplements like turmeric/curcumin?
>>16164858Sounds like you're just depressed. Have you tried anti-depressants? Did you take them exactly as prescribed for at least a month?
>>16164735What if you do a cold shower instead of the fan?
>>16164837>The main symptom is obviously an excessive urge to start shit threads on /sci/.OMG...he's literally me!>>16164858Sounds like you're an autistic retard, hey it happens. Half of us here are autistic retards, the other half autistic assholes. Take some LSD in low doses and just keep at it until you fix your brain. Don't forget the sitting in front of the fan part, on LSD I bet it feels nuts!
>>16164735list meds youve tried
>>16165077Tried low carb, did nothing. Havent done anti-inflammatories>>16165111>>16165167Bupropion, Sertraline, Tranylcypromine, Nortriptyline, Paliperidone, Auvelity, NSI-189, some others I can't remember. Meds do literally nothing. I get the smallest of side effects which are gone by day 3, and from then on they produce no changes regardless of how long I take them. Even the antipsychotic stopped producing effects after a week. Meds are useless to me.>>16165161Thanks for the bump>>16165137It's not about the temperature but the air intake itself it seems. Cold showers never did anything
>>16165182Alright. List your drug and alcohol consumption honestly. List the drugs you abuse or have abused in the past. >meth>Xanax>any controlled substances >heavy drinking or inhalants Occasional small amounts of alcohol do not count. You say you can't generally feel pleasure?
>>16165182Also list Marijuana it is a drug. If you smoke it, how often?
>>16165307At least a dozen marijuanas a day.
>>16165298>>16165307>drug and alcohol consumptionNone. The only recreational drug I've had is alcohol (I drink very rarely). Not even weed or shrooms. Not to mention I didn't drink until age 21, whereas my mental health declined from age 14-17. If I had to give ANY specific cause beyond genes, I was given a heavy dose of antibiotics around age 1-2 due to an ear infection, and I was allergic to one of them (Penicillin). Childhood obesity is linked to heavy antibiotics use, so given that and a family history of mental illness (my father is a drug addict), I suppose that could ruin my stomach bacteria environment and cause the illness.>You say you can't generally feel pleasure?Yes. The number of pleasures I can enjoy is so small, I can list them all right here:>Brief pleasure during orgasm>Pleasure when I think something good is going to happen (motivational reward system is intact)>Very small amounts of pleasure from foodThat's it. Basically I'm like one of those guys who fry their brain on benzos or meth or antipsychotics, but I've never done drugs.
>>16164735It is kind of amusing that you made this post about seeing so many doctors and taking so many pills yet you forgot to mention what was your problem
>>16165336It seems that OPs issue is quite literally dervied from being a sentient being.
>>16165333I will not give you advice, rather tell you a story. I abused drugs and alcohol very heavily, but sobered up over 3 years ago. I did large amounts of work and praying. Work were you aren't getting paid. >prayed hard because I was out of options>felt no real pleasure except for brief moments >did lots of hard volunteer work and felt no pleasure >stayed sober and kept working and praying >after about 1 or 2 years pleasure started to slowly returnYou might need to try church or alternative spirituality- like praying to stars etc. You will also have to volunteer and work hard, even though there will be no immediate joy in doing so. Some people have to work hard and be patient for the real pay off. I took no prescriptions during this period except for short course antibiotics and a few short courses of other persciptions. So the end to my fear and depression was not the result of prescriptions. Your path might be alternate
>>16165336>>16165339Because you'll go "oh I know what this disease is, it's depression".If I tell you my symptoms are lethargy, apathy, insomnia, dulled senses, poor memory... what does this tell you? The answer is nothing. Really it tells you nothing. Maybe it's "depression". Maybe it's sleep apnea. Maybe you have a deficiency. Maybe your gut microbiome is in poor condition. Maybe you have a parasite. All of these things are possible. Psychiatric symptoms are useless, they fool you into believing you know more about the problem than you actually do.
>>16165350Your brain just naturally recovered from the abuse, tends to happen after sobriety
>>16165354What you say is somewhat true. Finding purpose and meaning is also nothing to sneeze at. Have you considered alternate paths to YOUR recovery? Perhaps something in addition to perscription medicine? You might have to get creative and work really hard.
>>16165356Everything else is just a cope dude. If your brain didn't fix itself you wouldn't be caring about spirituality. There is no life you can live with a broken brain
>>16165358Do you know what the mind body and spirit are? Some people don't believe in the spirit, only the body and the mind. Believe what you want, I'm not capable of selling you anything. But I do believe in the mind, body and spirit.
>>16164735First, you have to solve my problem of wanting more money, then I will have the resources to help you.
>>16165361I used to get emotional when I read the bible. Now I read it and feel nothing. Can't believe in the spirit whatsoever. C'est la vie
>>16165366Who said that spirits dwell in books? Read as you wish or pass when you wish. Some enter the spirit world without the aid of books or temples.
>>16164858Oh, so you are just a stupid person who doesn't realize what you are actively doing right now by posting trying to find ways to improve your life and outlook longing for a different way to live is an emotional response that came from your brain rather than a physical one that was just physiological responses?
>>16165431This is why I didn't lead with symptoms. People hyperfocus on the symptoms despite not being able to understand what they even are because words are a poor medium for communication. If you think I'm healthy, leave the thread. You have nothing to add.
>>16165467You have it wrong, I am saying you are so unhealthy in the head that your descriptions are entirely unreliable due to your poor mastery of language and you will just keep contradicting yourself and saying nonsense due to your poor mastery of logic.
>>16164735>Help me solve my mental illnessQuit 4chan. Next.
>>16165474Obviously it's impossible to live in a completely emotionless state unless you're literally catatonic. When someone says they're emotionally dead it means the strength of their emotions has diminished to the extent they practically are not there. Just use common sense man.
>>16165487Calm down, take a breath, it just sounds like you are getting mad at your own stupidity and your continual inability to master language and logic since your whole complaint now seems to be that you actually didn't mean what you originally said because what you said then, you now believe is actually impossible.
>>16165182meds always do something and you really should think more objectively. Do you journal at all? like real journaling and not just blogging on anonymous forums?if working out does anything for you then Id immediately look in the direction of beta blockers or maybe even stimulants, neither of which you have apparently tried.you *obviously* have a personality disorder, have you ever tried CBT for like a whole year straight with a shrink you liked?
>>16164858It sounds like Bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. More likely Bipolar disorder with psychotic symptoms.I'm sorry OP. Try to work out your feelings and thoughts with a therapist, it's important that you find a frame of thinking that suits the changes the disease effect on you.
>>16165498>meds always do something and you really should think more objectivelyNot sure what to tell you. I took a dozen different pills and they did nothing. Only two of them produced any effects -- Nortriptyline and Tranylcypromine. By week 3 or 4 on these pills, I felt super drowsy and it was like being on cough syrup but my musical anhedonia went away. The effect disappeared after a week for both. Despite continuing to take them, the effects never returned. Even after I began Auvelity which is literally cough syrup + a stimulant the same effects did not occur.>Do you journal at all? like real journaling and not just blogging on anonymous forums?I used to journal every night and gave up as the disease progressed. There's no point doing so when every day is the same.>if working out does anything for you then Id immediately look in the direction of beta blockers or maybe even stimulants, neither of which you have apparently tried.I can't get a prescription for stimulants. Not sure about beta blockers though>you *obviously* have a personality disorderWhat makes you say that?>have you ever tried CBTWhy do you think therapy would work?
>>16165506>psychotic symptomsI've never had delusions, or heard voices, or had scattered thoughts. You probably find my description of anhedonia strange, but bear in mind I'm attempting to put into words a sensation that none of you reading this thread will ever experience in your life, unless you undergo meth psychosis or a strong dose of antipsychotics and your entire brain chemistry flips on its head. I don't like talking about the symptoms because none of you are capable of actually understanding them. This isn't bipolar disorder. It's not schizophrenia. It's not SPD. It's not depression. If it has a name, we've probably not heard of it before. That is the sort of disease this is.
>>16165515You obviously have had delusions since you originally claimed you can't feel emotions, then you said that it is impossible to not feel emotions.
>>16164735Just be yourself, take shower a day, drink 2 liters of water and learn programming
>>16164745kek. OP in shambles
>>16164735have you tried talking about yourself on social media ?
>>16165182>stopped producing effects after a week. Meds are useless to meYou need to take them for at least a month. Two months would be better. It's really common for people to only take them for a week or two and then claim they don't work. You also need to take the exact dosage as prescribed every day at the same time, if you miss doses at the start of just delays how long it takes to start working. I didn't take them properly when I started them either but they definitely worked for me once I did it properly
>>16165536You are talking to someone who is claiming to be in the midst of a prolonged emotional breakdown because they can't feel emotions, don't bother reasoning with the type of people who think they are only being so emotional because they can't have emotions, you won't get anywhere.
I have anhedonia too. People at work think i am on drugs or alcohol. Probably caused by childhood trauma and depression in my case.
>>16165536I took most for about 3-4 weeks and gave up. I was on Parnate/NTP longer but they just did nothing. I made this thread because I don't believe that meds are necessary. From 2021 to 2023, a set of events occurred where my symptoms improved for the first time (Keep in mind, I've had this shit since 2014). I thought /sci/ might be more clever than me and figure out exactly what the mechanism of improvement is but after the stupid replies so far it's looking unlikely. Still, I may as well explain more.Every time I've seen improvement in my symptoms, wind has been involved. Sometimes it's a portable fan. Sometimes it's a cold breeze in the wintertime. Sometimes it's the air from my car window, or the air blowing in my face while driving a golf cart. Normally this produces a weak effect, but if I have caffeine in my system the effect is amplified and leads to a general reduction in symptoms, such as colors appearing brighter and my sense of smell returning. I think exercise also boosts the effect but not as significantly. Also, rest assured this is not hypoxia, I've already covered that.But it's more complicated than that. When I put my head directly in front of a fan, no effect like that ever occurs. Only when the wind source is far away and discontinuous does any effect actually happen. I thought maybe it's because the air intake between nostrils is uneven but in reality it's probably thanks to the discontinuity of the air flow. This would also explain why I felt it almost immediately while driving a golf cart & from winter winds despite the length of time of those being far shorter than time spent with a fan. A caveat though is that if I strain my head or "tense" up at all during this, I get a headache & all progress is lost. I've given myself insomnia by accident this way many times. If I can manage to uphold this effect without slipping, maybe the symptoms will disappear. Still, I have no clue what the mechanism may be. Maybe /sci/ knows
>>16165552Yet you still care enough to blog about yourself on the internet while seeking free entertainment outlets, how interesting.
>>16164735What was the age of onset? You say it was 10 years ago, what age where you approximately back then?I personally had quite similar story where I had what seemed like depression - took dozens of different SSRIs, nothing worked. Turned out it was untreated ADHD that kind of devolved into this state. Started stimulants, therapy and in a month this years-long problem was gone. In my case depression-like symptoms started in early teens, lasted till early 20s diagnosis.
>>1616556714 when it became noticeable. Probably began during puberty.>untreated ADHDI did an ADHD test and came out negative, so ehh. Good to hear you're recovered though.
>>16165515That sensation? Yeah, that's the delusion. You're a fucking hypochondriac. You are imagining that something is wrong with yourself. The bullshit "cures" you because you are - pay attention to the operative word here - *deluded* that it would
>>16165579Thanks for the bump
>>16165580Thanks for the implicit admission that you are just an attention whore.
>>16165584If I'm an attention whore wouldn't that make you a retard for giving me attention?
>>16164735I have found the process to know if an anon on /sci/ is a woman or not now.1- Talks about their mental issues non fucking stop: >OP- "I'm so schizo anon, the pills anon, the voices anon">Chad autistic anon -"stfu nigger">OP-"incel"2- Talks only about psychology and sociology3- Posts shit cropped "schizo-post" memes like OP has attached.Because women seem to only give a fuck about their mental issues and dumb fuck sociological problems, and not, you know, what this broad is primarily here to discuss, which is hard science (they don't like this term because its the shit you can prove) they are quite easy to spot. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but for fucks sake, talk about something else. Because often all hear is "there is not enough women in STEM". Then be the fucking women in STEM.
>>16165608I'm trying to solve a medical problem via experiment, retard. This is more scientific than 90% of the board.
>>16165573>14So similar to me more or less.Diagnosis later in life is not that simple. That’s why it took a very good doctor to do it in my case.Are you sensitive to noise / easy to distract?Do you have issues with sleep?How did you react to dangerous (life threatening) situations you had in your life (if you had any)?Caffeine and other weak stimulants do help with ADHD (though to a marginal degree compared to meds). I myself drank copious amount of coffee before diagnosis (and as such, not even knowing I have ADHD) as it simply did slightly improve my condition. Exercise too is well known to help.
>>16165613You haven't introduced a single medical problem, though, you just keep saying your feelings are hurt by the fact you don't have emotions.
>>16165616There probably is some ADHD but it's no big deal, it's not the main issue. Always the type of person who found class incredibly boring and daydreamed through it, who never did homework or studied, who had to manually find the motivation each time to do any work, etc.
>>16165584What if he’s just desperate?This board has mostly retard and bait threads anyway. A single larp or attention whore doesn’t decrease the overall quality.If he really is someone who needs help and cannot get any from doctors, it’s worth trying to help.
>>16165626>manually find the motivation each time to do any workwhat does this even mean?
>>16165629Or what if he is just an attention whore has recently discovered that desperate people tend to get more attention?
>>16165626>it’s not the main issue even if it’s thereThat’s the point - it can be. That’s why I’ve given my example. When it’s untreated it eventually spawns other issues that are a huge problem themselves. I had major depression, anxiety, near-suicide attempts, complete anhedonia for years and even catatonic states from time to time.For me the ADHD itself never was much of a problem on its own. I’d say there are even some advantages to it. But living in a society built for ‘normal’ people in mind without addressing it destroys you and makes you miserable.
>>16165632It means you can't simply up and do work without inventing a new rationale for motivation each time. What ADHD havers call "executive dysfunction".
>>16165613Okay anonFirst define your variables:What is your condition?How long have you had it?What do you expect to change after the experiment?But I would lovingly like to remind you to GO ASK YOUR FUCKING DOCTOR TO WHICH YOU HAVE SAID YOU HAVE HAD MANY, AND TALK TO THEM ABOUT YOUR SEEMINGLY CALMING EXPERIMENTAL CONCLUSIONS.
>>16165641Yeah I can see how ADHD causes some to spiral, beginning with perennial frustration and compounding until you hit some serious depressive lows leading to anhedonia and suicide attempts. ADHD for me personally never became a problem until college though, by which time my mind was already screwed. It is definitely a shitty disease though
>>16165644I told my doctor what I found, and she decided I must be having delusions and concluded I'm schizophrenic. She was keen on the schizo angle for a long time, because I took a 600 question psychology exam, and my answers ticked the "schizophrenic" box the most closely out of 21 boxes (runner-up was depression). I don't really mind being called schizo, but it seems like a big leap in judgment. All the stuff I told to her, I've reiterated in this thread basically. You can judge for yourself whether it passes as "schizophrenic" or not.
>>16164735Eat grassfed butter.
>>16165650Okay great.Do you experience psychosis often? I:E do you hear voices when no one is their?Do you see things that don't make sense or are seemingly odd?Do you often mistake things for a real occurrence? From my understanding you seem lucid enough to talk about this shit, is it something you are interested in? (psychology that is). Take a comment from the classic case of schizophrenia, Terry A Davis. It would often be akin to: "RUN OVER THE CIA NIGGERS WITH YOUR CAR, oooo theres a castle over their. anyway ermmm, uh, wut, oh right, ummm ILLUMINATI." But he was incredibly lucid when talking about computers and software.Ramble:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbG6u86t4bALucid:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKm8rVaZfqg&t
>>16165562(I’m the adhd anon)>windI don’t see how wind would benefit anything physically.It’s either:- placebo- an unusual case of stimming (common for adhd and autism, look it up if you don’t know the term)- it kind of gets your body ‘in action mode’ for a lack of better word, would play into the adhd theoryAs for the last suggestion, that’s why I asked for your reaction to dangerous situations. How do you react to risk, to adrenaline?
>>16165661Nah mate. I've never heard voices, no visions, no delusions, no "imaginary friends", none of that. Going strictly by psychiatry terms, what I have resembles "negative-type schizophrenia". This is essentially schizophrenia without the psychotic symptoms. HOWEVER if you look into the actual literature on this, you'll find these cases resemble classic schizophrenics closely in many ways. They'll have some form of paranoia, psychomotor dysfunction, horrible hygiene, etc. Further, when it comes to schizophrenics and anhedonia (AKA loss of pleasure), their reward system tends to break in the opposite way to mine. A schizophrenic loses the ability to feel motivation (a type of pleasure), but when he performs an action he does feel pleasure. There is no diagnosis which resembles what I have. To feel what I live through 24/7, you'd have to inject yourself with an atypical antipsychotic or go through drug psychosis basically.
>>16165670Okay my guess your psychologist has or you have have mistaken schizophrenia with schizoid personality disorder (SzPD) which is a common mistake given they have similar names.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder> There are no effective medications for schizoid personality disorder. However, certain medications may reduce the symptoms of SzPD and treat co-occurring mental disorders. Since the symptoms of SzPD mirror the negative symptoms of schizophrenia, antipsychotics have been suggested as a potentially effective medication for SzPD.So if these things you do (coffee, cardio, ect) help, then they are probably your best bet.
>>16165668All your ideas read as placebo/psychosomatic but this is undeniably a physical sensation. When this happens, that part of my brain behind the temple begins to throb lightly. If I'm not gentle, the throbbing area will "tighten up" and become something like a headache which can easily cause insomnia. However, cardio and caffeine seem to have the effect of undoing this tension in the head. If I can keep the tension low but allow that stimulation to continue, the symptoms improve.>How do you react to risk, to adrenaline?Bodily fear. All the bodily sensations are there, like your stomach dropping and your feet filling with lead. It's only those brain sensations that are gone. They're just replaced with a sort of constipated tension rather than any real emotion.
>>16165681I think SPD is a bullshit diagnosis honestly
>>16165688I know people with it. When ever I talk to them they don't utter a single word, they sit alone, quite emotionally dull and they are asocial to the core. They don't meet the requirements of ASD or AS (repetitive movements, intense interests ect). Honestly it would be better calling it, lame autism but it isn't a neurodevelopmental disease.
>>16165701I know the kind of person you mention and I agree they're far more akin to autists.
>>16165684Have you had your blood pressure measured?Or intracranial pressure maybe?
Mental illness is largely a consequence of diminished spiritual power running through your energetic body. Do semen retention and meditate every day for a year and see how your consciousness transforms effortlessly. You will never solve this mechanically.
>>16165713Blood pressure is fine. Didn't know you can measure intracranial pressure actually
>>16165742I don't need your friendship, I'm already a multitrillionaire. I don't needs your ideas or fortifications either. These are far too basic. Try again later(much later, when you've sorted your morals and intellect). You never bothered me that way
>>16164858Your neural networks need to be rebalanced. spend two weeks staring at a blank wall each day, no distraction, from morning to night time. Do nothing but that. No music, no audiobooks, nothing, just you and that blank wall. Do it until it hurts just to think that taht's what you will do first thing in the morning, until it's so unbearable that you begin to consider suicide.The point is to become so, so painfully bored that once you're done with the reset, ANYTHING will feel interesting again and you will get the minimal pleasure you're looking for back.
>>16165745>multitrillionaireanother loser
This thread was moved to >>>/adv/31211129
