Over the last year I saw unprecedented change through the uncharacteristic things that happened to me since I got introduced to tzeentch and the warp. I used to be a zealous Atheist and now I'm ritualistic and find it hard to keep a materialist view on anything. I'm now trying to find answers and knowledge regarding the spiritual side of life that I've always neglected, I feel like I have my greed emotion dialed up to 11, If I feel like I'm stagnating even a little bit I start feeling physical pain. I'm not saying it's tzeentch or anything like that, but I'm finding it hard to believe that if there's a god out there it wouldn't be like the architect. The warp in essence just makes sense and explains so much to me. Am I going full schizo? Honestly nothing really traumatic has happened just that I've become more aware of change around me.
>>32555161Not trying to be rude but like the God from Warhammer ( I know chaos magicians sometimes do that sort of thing) or is there actual mythos I'm missing out on and you may be going full schizo (seems to be a risk for practicioners ) but honestly you may of tapped into something that tzeentch is the closest approximation to. It's good you're aware of fhe change and are more mindful. And there's nothing wrong with avoiding stagnation (try to insure some moments of peace tho if possible simply for the sake of your body and mind ) I'd say there's nothing wrong with being greedy as long as you have the strength of mind to avoid it altering your decisions negatively. Or causing undue harm to others. Perhaps try to find a balance. For each greedy act you commit attempt to do something altruistic if possible. (Mainly just to protect your mental health and conscious)
>>32555276Also forgot to add if you into kind of primordial chaos for your practices look into void magick ( not the stuff from war hammer I can drop a link or two on it) but don't really mess with it until you are 100% sure and your mental health is damn flawless. I haven't really practiced any of it despite reading on it. Because of the risks. Be safe anon. Be well. Take care of yourself . And good luck on your path. I hope it leads you well
>>32555161Sanity is the price of knowledge, anon. I though you knew that.
>>32555161He is probably just a copy of some pagan god.
>>32555351>but don't really mess with it until you are 100% sure and your mental health is damn flawless.You peaked my interest.
>>32555161(1/2) A handful of months ago I started playing WH3 and I watched a lore video on the chaos gods because I didn’t know much about them other than what was obvious. I thought Tzeentch was the most interesting by far. A lot less cliché than the basic lust/wrath/pestilence theme. Fast forward a month or two, and I imbibed a certain fungus. It started off alright, but quickly got very disturbing. And as completely stupid as it sounds at a point as I was basically completely absorbed into tzeentch-like mental headspace. Equipped with the same imagery and revelations. I became wholly absorbed and terrified by the fact that in all my frantic thoughts I couldn’t really pin anything down. I was realizing so much, but it would all just spiral. It was like answering an infinite question. 100/3 = 33.333333333~. I realized that was the nature of reality. Nothing could really be said for certain, everything is circumstantial, an constant overlap of contradictions. A logical world with an illogical answer to its nature. I more or less understood this prior, but looking at it from a better perspective made it terrifying. The only constant is inconsistency. I wholly subscribe to the idea that words are only derive value from their usefulness, but insooth nothing can be defined. If every rule has exceptions then there can be no true rule. Just what is true enough.
>>32555629(2/2) I could go on and on. I just felt dumb for deriving a sense of profound insight and terror because I thought about a god from a fucking tabletop game. Try explaining that to a normie without sounding like both a massive nerd and an absolute schizo. Regardless of that, it does go to show that it doesn’t really matter where you learn something from, if it describes something true, it’s true and that’s all there is to it. It makes me wonder where the creators got their inspiration for tzeentch from, because they were definitely on to something with that. Anyways, thanks for sharing this anon. It makes me feel less dumb. And also, don’t think about it too much, because the web of logical chaos isn’t good for your mind.
>>32555161You want to be a slave? Why did you choose him if he hurts you when you want to repent?
>>32555276I think I should clarify, I don't believe in tzeentch exactly. It's just that this is the concepts given in this universe is what pushed me towards the arcane and more metaphysical aspects of life. It feels as if I'm enchanted and not in any control of my desires especially when it comes to learning anything. Warhammer is a copy and satire of everything anyways. >>32555351I've been going into Chaos Magick because that's what Warhammer mainly ripped off, but I'm going into more of the beginner occult tomes of knowledge to just learn more. Honestly a solid 8-9 hours of day I spend reading and writing my notes about the things I have read. Haven't tried any practices myself late, honestly the possibility of success is as terrifying as failure since I have managed to keep this obsession somewhat contained and I feel practicing might end that.
>>32555669I find this time usually at night since sleep ends in either incomprehensible sights or terrifying nightmares
>>32555629>>32555638I definitely understand what you are describing. Honestly I felt like I'm going insane plenty because I was so connected to my material view of the world that the veil being lifted forced me to see everything and everyone in a new light. The revelation is enlightening but also extremely difficult.
>>32555408About sanity, I'm an insomniac but other than sleep deprivation related issues I don't have anything else. Since I'm in uni I had the whole summer to focus on these revelations. I am getting 5-6 hours of sleep thanks to schedule being a bit more open now but honestly I want to delve into the secrets of the dreamscape too somehow despite the nightmares
>>32555645I respect your belief in something that brings you relief, but I cannot return to the abrahamic god if I am true to myself. There's a reason I was a zealous Atheist before this delve into the spiritual realm
>>32555161>tzeentchhey hey people