Conan bros, assemble
>>181923417>Basil Poledouris intensifies
This thread pleases Crom
Imagine not liking Conan lmao.
>>181923638One of the most epic films of all time!
She definitely took him.
>>181923559>she automatically just transfers her hero worship from Doom to Conan>he ignores her bowing and offers a hand to help her stand up insteadI love Conan's quiet heroism at key moments of the film
What makes Conan so comfy?
>>181923906Dolph Lungren too
>>181923638What do you think it means when the father's sword breaks against the Atlantean sword during the big fight scene?
>old king conan movie never ever
>>181924315They'll do it one day and it'll be a woman king
>>181924315>mfw we didnt get the anthology conan show cause of that amazon bitch
>>181924315>have to watch fucking red sonja to get a trilogie
>>181924173He solved the riddle of steel. Steel isn't strong; men are strong. What is steel without flesh to wield it? And, of course, it's not just about physical strength. The whole movie is about the importance of strength of will.
>>181925164Which is also why he kills Doom with his father's broken sword, but afterwards discards it on the ground. There's a symbolic justice to killing him with it, but it's only broken steel after that.
My child. You have come to me, my son. For who now is your father if it is not me? Who gave you the will to live? I am the wellspring from which you flow. When I am gone...you will have never been. What will your world be without me? My son.
>>181923417>no one, not even you will remember if we were good men or bad>why we fought or why we died>no>all that matters is that two stood against manyi wish i could articluate how this makes me feel. this is humanity. pure soul
>>181925422Best prayer ever.Especially the ending.
He's better than Conan.
Conan : I remember days like this when my father took me to the forest and we ate wild blueberries. More than 20 years ago. I was just a boy of four or five. The leaves were so dark and green then. The grass smelled sweet with the spring wind.[pause] Conan : Almost 20 years of pitiless cumber! No rest, no sleep like other men. And yet the spring wind blows, Subotai. Have you ever felt such a wind?Subotai : They blow where I live too. In the north of every man's heart.Conan : It's never too late, Subotai.Subotai : No. It would only lead me back here another day. In even worse company.Conan : For us, there is no spring. Just the wind that smells fresh before the storm.
>>181925647>They blow where I live too. In the north of every man's heart.Holy kino.
>>181925647Subotai is the best bro
>>181923984>heroismI don’t know if you’ve ever gotten this look from a woman before but he’s leading her back to Conan’s fuck hut
>>181925721>15 year old British girl on her first film with two notorious womanizers in Arnold and Wilt ChamberlainNo way her virginity survived.
BY CROM, MY SWORD IS CALLING ME BACK TO THE MOUNTAINS SONOFABITCH IM IN
>>181924404>Amazon bitchWho? The weird chick that married Sly Stallone?
>>181925757>sprints up a hill on one leg to block Doom's snake arrowdude was relentless
>>181925647I really like the subtlety of this scene.Conan imagines what his life would be like if he weren't a warrior, and realizes that up to the present moment he hasn't had peace of mind.He even offers his friend Subotai the chance to leave, as that fight wasn't even his, but Subotai is loyal to his Cimerian friend and chooses to stay.Conan then realizes that for wild men like them in that world there is no ultimate peace. Just short moments of calm.Pure poetry.
>>181925731>parents avenged>people avenged>Doom dead>snake cult extinguished>lifelong vengeance complete>...now what?>well, there's a quest to finish first, then...whatever the wind brings
>>181925795I'm sure she was looked after.
>>181925164>What is steel without flesh to wield it?A bridge?
LET ME TELL YOU OF THE DAYS OF HIGH ADVENTURE
Has the zoophilia in the big city been always there or have I seen some uncut version?
>>181923559his boots remind me of Skyrim
>>181926029Where the guy is shagging the donkey? It was always there.
>>181926029I think it's only in the director's cut
Did the Children of Doom all kill themselves in the end?
King Osric: There comes a time, thief, when the jewels cease to sparkle, when the gold loses its luster, when the throne room becomes a prison, and all that is left is a father's love for his child.
>>181926076No. His control was broken and they just up and left.
>>181926110>described as being like Conan in his youth>usurped the throneit's like a cycle
Both Conan movies are the closest we'll get to a D&D adaptation.
>>181923538Basil and Milius were a perfect combination.
The perfect woman does not e
>>181926241I dunno, man. There's DnD as intended (letting you do your own Lord of the Rings etc) and then there's DnD as it usually gets played, which is a bunch of jackass murder-hobos meming their way through an adventure and barely even remembering why they are doing anything.Monty Python's Holy Grail is closer to how DnD plays than pretty much anything else I've ever seen although the new DnD movie looks like tabletop as well.
>>181926076No, they were supposed to, he was trying to induce a mass suicide. But Conan beheading him and showing him to be nothing but a man freed them and they left.
>>181923417Never got around to finishing it for the past thirty years.
what was the point of Thulsa Doom's schemes?why found the snake cult for mass suicide?why destroy the cimmerian village?
>>181923984People get this impression Conan is stupid because he doesn't talk a lot, but he really never comes across as such. It probably went hand in hand to have Arnold speak as little as possible because of his accent, but it let Conan speak more with his mannerisms and body language.
I want Red Sonja to sit on my face.Also I recently saw Red Sonja for the first time lately and liked it more than the 2nd Conan.
>>181925392That entire scene is what I'd call a botched persuasion roll.
ANONS WHAT IS BEST IN LIFE?
>>181926563You might as well as why any religious cult leader out there does what he does. Delusions of godhood, personal power and wealth, etc.
>>181926563He straight up tells Conan why before crucifying him. Did you even watch the movie?He said in his Youth he sought power through steel. (Only Cimmerians knew how to make it so he would raid and steal it from them. aka the riddle of steel)Then when he grew older he learned about the power of flesh (Both literally the power of commanding people, and magic, the power of human sacrifice that gave him magical powers)Do you even lift bro?
>>181926595Conan is actually incredibly smart.
>>181926241not D&D, but rather sword & sorcery that preceded it
>>181926563>To run a cult>He just lost against Conan, he was burning it all down>He was a warlord in his younger years and raided and destroyed villages for steel and slaves
>>181926416What I mean is that Conan presents, in my eyes, the perfect version of a fantasy exploration role-playing game.Finding a sword in ancient ruins.Be trained and become multiclass thanks to the teachings of warriors from a distant land.Failing the Will test and falling into a witch's trap.Rescue the slave from the witch and befriend him.Wander through cities in search of information about the cult that killed his parents.Infiltrate a tower (dungeon) to steal a valuable gem.Preparing an ancient battlefield for a fight.Among other things that remind me a lot of a pure fantasy RPG adventure.At least as I imagined when reading the rulebooks as a child. Not the nonsense that happens at a real table. But something serious and epic.
>>181926563>what was the point of Thulsa Doom's schemes?Why does anyone form a cult? Control of others. Donated wealth. >why found the snake cult for mass suicide?When did they commit mass suicide? The cult fell apart with the death of Thulsa Doom >why destroy the cimmerian village?In the early days they were looking for weapons of steel. Doom says as much in the movie.
>>181923417Imagine being Conan. Not a care in the world, travelling wherever doing whatever. One month a thief, next month a merc, then a pirate.
>>181926595He's stoic but contemplative. Which isn't really particularly like the Conan of the books who's more boisterous, but it works for the film's tone.
>>181926680Cranberry juice slushes
>>181926724>Delusions of godhoodA broken sword to the neck robbed him of that particular delusion
>>181925596I really wasn't expecting 2/3 of Solomon Kane stories to take place in Africa but Great White Hunter trope ala King Solomon's Mines is kino.
>>181926241The Thirteenth Warrior is closer.
>>181924173the object itself is unimportant, man is like steel and must become stronger through adversity, just like steel is forged from iron.
>>181924315>Arnold returns to star in old king conan movie>His crown weighs heavy on a troubled brow for there are many problems in the kingdom and many enemies at its borders>But Conan's sons are not hard men nor wise rulers. They are gluttonous, vain pigs, only ever having known the luxury of their father's wealth and power.>Conan knows his days are coming to an end, and he is weary of passing his rule to such degenerates as his current heirs.>Conan decides that to clear his mind, he wants to tour his realm, to remember his old glory days and the feats he lived>One day on the expedition, his group goes to the local slave pits to observe the fights. One particular slave catches Conan's eye and starts his mind racing. He looks familiar, like someone he once knew long ago. It cannot be! King Conan demands the slavemaster bring the slave before him at once.
>>181926680https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhkC82RPSL8TO SNEED ZIER TREADSTO FEEL BUCKS BREAKING BENEATH YOUTO HEAR ZE LAMENTATIONS OF ZIER JANNIES
>>181927219Holy shit is Doom's lost son ffs
>Do you want to live forever?
>>181927750SHE WAS A VALKYRIE
>>181923608And if it doesn't, TO HELL WITH HIM!
Bran Mak Morn movie never!
since we're having a Conan thread, bros, what stories do you recommend i read? i have read so far>God in the Bowl>Phoenix on the Sword>Frost-Giant's Daughter>Tower of the Elephantall 4 were good-to-great, last 2 i liked the mostwhere do i go next?>>181925731this scene is what really made the movie for me. as i was watching the film, some parts i found profound or poignant and liked, others i found a little cheesy. but then this scene came on and won me over completely
>>181928091Right is god tier
At the end. Doom men stormed an elevated fortified position on horseback then split up into groups of one to allow themselves get picked off
>>181928091>2 babes AND 2 swordsright, no contest
>>181926813conan is still quite intelligent in the books, the whole point isn't "look at the big dumb brute who can beat everything with raw strength" its about a person with a fundamentally different philosophy about life
i always thought this was considered one of the great 1980's action movies but it was does not have as great score on review sets like imdb
>>181928111>The Scarlet Citadel (for King Conan)>Rogues in the House (For Young Thief Conan)It's neat you can bop around Conan's life.
>>181926776The Atlantean Sword scene is peak fantasy>Conan, set free by his master, yet at the mercy of the dogs>Stumbles into an old tomb where the old Atlantean warrior sits>Unlike what your average tomb raider would do, Conan honors the skeletal figure when taking the sword, handling it with gentle reverence>The Atlantean warrior, perhaps recognizing this, bows to Conan, his long vigil finished now a worthy successor has been found>Conan, now having proved himself worthy of the sword, emerges from the rock mounds>He strikes off the chains which bound him, for now he is truly able to win his freedomPic related really says it all
>>181928188In "Tower of the Elephant" Conan in his spare time listens to the philosophers & scholars debate, Kinda like how we listen to podcasts today.
>>181928192Those sites are run by pussies and women.John Milius made his films for men.
>>181928188Conan speaks multiple languages and is clearly a very intellectual person, no simpleton brute could ever aspire to become what he achieved in his life.
>>181928329i liked the callback to it in The Northman>>181928394>Conan in his spare time listens to the philosophers & scholars debate, Kinda like how we listen to podcasts today.picrel
Did I fucked up by buying "The Coming of Conan the Cimmerian" before the Barbarian books? The book was highly recommended as a must read Conan book so when I bought it I thought it was Conan the Barbarian stories but instead was Conan the King. Not complaining just wanted to know if I would be spoiled if I were to pick up the Barbarian series.
>>181926595>People get this impression Conan is stupid because he doesn't talk a lotBut the film explicitly states he's versed in philosophy, poetry and the art of warfare?
>>181926029>>181926306I got the uncut version from Columbia house back in the day. It is in there also longer nude scene with his woman. And the end is longer as he just sits more as it all burns.
>>181928495she was hottter as the queen of lesbians in Sonja.
>>181926442It wasn't for a mass suicide, he intended to send them to their homes so they would slay their fathers and rulersKing Osric earlier shows the Fangs of the Serpment, one of which his daughter would wield against himThulsa Doom's plan would have caused mass chaos across the land, perfect for his warband to insert themselves
>>181926595Because brainlets think you have to quip constantly to come across as smart
>>181928750He probably got confused because of the ritualistic cannibalism and Doom calling at least one woman to kill herself as a display of his power
>>181923417whats the best short story to start with?
>>181928876Tower of the Elephant.Even thou Frost Giant's Daughter is the earliest.
>>181928642>i liked the callback to it in The Northmanit was a full circle in a way, since that scene in Conan was inspired by an Icelandic saga.
>>181928329>the very first thing he does when he emerges from the tomb is cut the chains on his ankleConan truly became a free man.I also love how the movie wisely doesn't show him killing the wolves. Just that look is enough for the viewer to know that the protagonist is now master of his own destiny.
>>181925392>your parents, your leaders, those who would call themselves your judges; those who have lied and corrupted the Earth, they shall all be cleansed.who was he talking about here exactly
>>181928981The look and the fact he's wearing all those wolf pelts before going to fuck a witch.
>>181928192It's an low key classic.It will probably only be fully revered when Arnold or John Milius dies.Just like Eyes Wide Shut and Showgirls were only recognized years later.Conan's era of recognition will come.The fact that critically acclaimed filmmakers like Eggers were such fans of the work that tried to emulate entire scenes is just one example of this film's legacy.
>>181926789They did not commit mass suicide but they where about to and then conan showed up and beheaded thulsa.
Subotai helps conan push over the vat of human meat>https://youtu.be/YH-EW44aBGU?t=316you can see remnants of it in the workprint and if you look closely you can see subotai in the actual theatrical release on the right of conan
>>181928876Release order as always but if you want to try one before buying since they're public domain go with Frost Giant's Daughter since its like five pages and one of the better stories.
>>181923559>Saving the indoctrinated woke kiddies from red universities.
>>181928679As long as its Howard its fine, order doesn't matter much
>>181928116You just know
>>181928039worms of the earth would make a fine film I think.But we may need to rename it.I cannot see 'worms of the earth' on a movie poster and attracting normalfags
>>181923638>Conan looking at his hand, remembering the touch of his mother he lost>Tulsa looking at the sword he took Conan's mother life withFucking kino of the highest order.
>No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That's what's important!
>>181929281in all 30 years of my life no other movie made me feel the gap between modern filmmaking and that of 80s-90s more than The Northmanthis scene felt like an ugly soulless caricature on an ultimate masterpiece
>>181928091Good has the better logo, but Nannan has he best cover.
>>181930520The track is called "Gift of Fury", the music swells when Conan looks up at Thulsa and swears vengeance. 3 minutes of zero dialogue and pure kino.
>>181929281Chad vs virgin
>>181929281The Northman was kino (and not just because of Conan callbacks). i'm so fucking mad that the same people who routinely piss and moan about the state of the industry and the franchise film landscape let this gorgeous piece of work fail at the box office. also, it didn't get any awards or even nomination nods, which was fucking bullshit
>>181928188I mean just in general demeanor. The film's version is a lot more quiet and brooding.
>>181929281god I hate modern movies so much, they look so bland. everything is made with shitty dark blue/green filters on
>>181931260>cgi cringe fest>kinochoose wise, boy
>>181928192Thing about those is most films pre-2000s except for the absolute biggest films tend to lack for reviews, those often just have some selection of print reviews from the time archived. Time changes a lot of films too. First Blood for instance had a mixed reception on release but in later years was seen much more positively, especially in comparison to the more loud and dumb sequels (though some notable critics like Ebert praised it on release). Conan's great score, production design, strong themes and even Arnold's casting in hindsight make it stand out among 80s fantasy now that we're far removed from the decade.
>>181928228Not bad for an Austrian bodybuilder.
hottest conan babe
>>181928329Also>wearing wolf pelts in the next scene
>>181930697anymore pics of Doom's snake cult warriors?
>>181928750I was thinking too much of the 70s cults that had an influence on the snake cult's depiction in the film, like Jonestown. It's been a while since I saw the film.
>>181923559Is this a deteted scene? Why don't I remember this? Did I just fall into another alternate reality again?
>>181931522it's from extended versionhttps://www.movie-censorship.com/report.php?ID=121
>>181931364There was very little CG in the Northman. At most it was used for set extensions. And Milius would have used it exactly like that in Conan if the technology had been available, don't delude yourself.
>>181931522Extended version, which is only about 3-4 minutes longer I think but the extensions are all good. Like the scene with Conan and Subotai above.
>>181923638The music is awesome.
>>181931600>there is an extended versionI had no idea. I'm so glad Conan is what the autist is spamming this board with now
>>181931655Go watch now!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=okpByy-F_WA
>>181931655The extended version adds nuance to some scenes and improves the ending considerably.
>>181924021It's a movie that adequately portrays the simplicity of the time Conan lives in. Not only do I think it as a more simple time, but in general it boils down life to only the things that matter at the time. As the other anon said, it's its sincerity and honesty
>>181931757SOVLI know Arnold's acting was a bit goofy in this film but he seems real and genuine here.
>>181925647>Conan : Almost 20 years of pitiless cumber!just saying, it's pitiless combat*
>>181926595conan is actually pretty intelligent in the books
>>181923984There's also how he's instinctively gentle with the naked woman they tossed to him as a reward when he was a fighter.
>>181928188people now hear barbarian and they think of seeing a giant muscle dude who can barely speak English fighting with abandon cause all they know is now the pop culture version of Arnold's Conan, They've heard Arnold talk funny and see a giant muscle dude so that's their entire vison of the pop culture barbarian of today and that version was reinforced by dungeons and dragons
>>181932128man i'd rather be contemplating it on the tree of candy apples
>>181932128>I've thought long and hard about it and I have come to the conclusion that being crucified sucks.
>>181932239... Why? What do they have there?
>>181932239The Tree of Candy Apples? What's that got?
>>181932112Conan being called a barbarian is a irony of sorts, Civilized folk tend to be two-faced & full of shit.
>>181932272>>181932273woebut it's not so big
>>181928679no, the Coming of Conan book puts the stories in the order they were written and if you read the Introduction they quote Howard "in writing these yarns I've always felt less as creating them as if I were simply chronicling his adventures as he told them to me" each story is basically King Conan going "hey did I ever tell you about the time I ..." "no? ok, well this is what happened" need to remember all the original stuff was published as short stories too and not as full novels
He would’ve made a good Conan if he bulked up a bit
>>181932112Dungeons and dragons has done irreparable damage to the entire fantasy genre.
>>181932533Nah. He has a lot of traits in common with him but you can tell he isn't white, something Conan is explicitly described as consistently.
Thank you Crom for this thread and for the sweet winds we may still smell.
>>181932533He'd be a perfect Turok.
Robert E Howard lore fag here. Thulsa Doom in the movies is not the one of the kull stories. He's a slave master from the east that later settled in what becomes stygia
>>181932533That's a really good call. He would have been great.
>>181931827>this product contains LEADsovl
>>181932533Wasn't he a bit of a headcase?
Still one of the best introductions in cinematic history.
>>181925987god I miss the early 80's
Milius and Arnold's DVD commentary of this is hilarious.
>>181932533Looks-wise, maybe. But personality-wise, not at all. Sonny was a dickhead and most of the crew were afraid of him due to his behavior. He stopped getting roles, so entered politics instead. Eventually lost his legs and died of heart failure.
>>181925721>need to keep her virginity intact>send her with this fucking guy to ensure it
>>181931684Based Conan's mom poster. Hottest girl in the film.
>>181933251wtf happened to his legs?
>>181933427>>181931684like a hotter Melania
>>181933497He lost 'em
>>181933509Or hot at all
>>181933487looks like my ex
If you're a Dark Souls fan read/listen to Xuthal of the Dusk.
>>181933576should have tied a bell around them lmao
>The ancient empires fall, the dark-skinned peoples fade and even the demons of antiquity gasp their last, but over all stands the Aryan barbarian, white-skinned, cold-eyed, dominant, the supreme fighting man of the earth.
>>181933998Good old Busiek. He had a really good run of Conan comics.
>>181928111Beyond the Black River is fairly short and a good adventureThe Hour of the Dragon is basically the quintessential Conan story
>>181933133This dude was truly one of us & its sad he ended his own life. I love how he wrote to Lovecraft & would tell him stuff like "won't worry about that crazy ass horror you dreamed about, Conan could totally kill it"
>>181934175>Darkness stalked on noiseless feet about him, scarcely driven back by his flickering torch. On either hand he saw dark openings, but he kept to the main corridor, watching the floor ahead of him carefully, lest he fall into some pit. And suddenly he heard the sound of a woman, weeping piteously. Another of Tsotha's victims, he thought, cursing the wizard anew, and turning aside, followed the sound down a smaller tunnel, dank and damp.>The weeping grew nearer as he advanced, and lifting his torch he made out a vague shape in the shadows. Stepping closer, he halted in sudden horror at the amorphic bulk which sprawled before him. Its unstable outlines somewhat suggested an octopus, but its malformed tentacles were too short for its size, and its substance was a quaking, jelly-like stuff which made him physically sick to look at. From among this loathsome gelid mass reared up a frog-like head, and he was frozen with nauseated horror to realize that the sound of weeping was coming from those obscene blubbery lips. The noise changed to an abominable high-pitched tittering as the great unstable eyes of the monstrosity rested on him, and it hitched its quaking bulk toward him. He backed away and fled up the tunnel, not trusting his sword. The creature might be composed of terrestrial matter, but it shook his very soul to look upon it, and he doubted the power of man-made weapons to harm it. For a short distance he heard it flopping and floundering after him, screaming with horrible laughter. The unmistakably human note in its mirth almost staggered his reason. It was exactly such laughter as he had heard bubble obscenely from the fat lips of the salacious women of Shadizar, City of Wickedness, when captive girls were stripped naked on the public auction block. By what hellish arts had Tsotha brought this unnatural being into life? Conan felt vaguely that he had looked on blasphemy against the eternal laws of nature.
>>181929281>HEEEEAAARRRRR ME ODIN, ALL-FATHER OF THE GODS; LET ME TELL YOU OF THE DAYS OF HIGH ADVENTURE
>>181933967I always really like how this implied they literally straight up ran miles and miles and miles to get to wherever they wanted to go. I agine being so physically fit you just straight up light run wherever you want to go even if it's miles away and you've got gear on your back all the way there. I went hiking 3.5 miles(with to much gear mind you) and I wanted to die towards the end of it
>>181933946if you slow it down and you can see the instant she wants to feel his riddle of steel
Bone Tomahawk reminds me alot of Beyond the Black River.
>200 replies>not a single link to King Conan milnius scripthttps://drive.google.com/file/d/1Cvd7t-Ik5zKCRo1on8xgnUXd2f0dfkfW/view
>>181926023how not to make a sword
>>181935197They're not making a sword, they're making a film.
How about Conan The Destroyer and the 2011 remake
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=OBGOQ7SsJrwFriendly reminder that this exists.
>Conan The DestroyerThese guys scared the shit out of me as a kid.>and the 2011 remakeNever saw it. Is it any good? Can't see how a somewhat burly guy can compete with a seven time Mr. Olympia.
>>181934633I watched that movie recently and it was honestly shit. Can't believe a bunch of faggots were recommending it to me for years
>>181923417I love Conan. Reading about how Robert E Howard killed himself after his mother died is extremely sad to me. I like to think I could have been his friend, been there for him when his mother passed & other difficult times, & would have done art for him where I would draw the ladies in his stories totally naked, as they were supposed to be.
>>181925554This. There is no irony or sneering derision at the subject matter or setting. Anathema to modern audiences.
>>181934318You always wanna die after the fist time you do anything strenuous. I meet 70+ year olds hiking in the mountains, they go faster than me. If you use your muscles every day, you retain them. Although, the grandpa hikers usually don't do any strength training, so they lose their fast twitch muscles, and end up tripping and hurting themselves as they fall, because the muscles they had in their youth to catch them from falls are gone from disuse in old age. But I digress.Anyway. It's like, dogs and horses and a few other animals that can keep up with humans, but for the most part a healthy, fit person beats anything else in endurance.
>>181923538I'm sick of pretending Destroyer wasn't fun kino and I'm always amazed at Wilt's size and strength
>>181935531Everything needs to ironic or dripping in mean sprinted bathos.I'm so sick of it.
>>181935461>Never saw it. Is it any good? Can't see how a somewhat burly guy can compete with a seven time Mr. Olympia.It's extremely forgettable. So forgettable in fact, I don't remember anything about it, except one scene where one of the side characters embraces his death, standing with arms out ready to die to a rain of arrows but then they all miss him and he's disappointed. It was the only slightly amusing and thus memorable scene in the entire flick. I guess I would not recommend based on that.
>>181935594Wilt was an absolute animal. Watching highlights of him playing ball look like an adult playing against children.
Jason does move like book Conan, Fights very unorthodox.
>>181935594It's entertaining but it's a pretty colossal step down from Barbarian in virtually every department
What do I know of cultured ways, the gilt, the craft and the lie?I, who was born in a naked land and bred in the open sky.The subtle tongue, the sophist guile, they fail when the broadswords sing;Rush in and die, dogs—I was a man before I was a king.
>>181935594i liked all of it except for that annoying shithead sidekick. god damn he sucked
>The intro sequence is literally just a bunch of inbred village idiots getting killed by another bunch of raiders>The camerawork, the music, the costume design and actually fucking shooting the thing instead of adding everything post-op still makes it more "epic" than galactic battles of untold proportions or mages of unlimited power fighting in bullshit realms in recent filmsLiterally nothing used to film Conan is lost tech to us now.It is not old enough to be completely forgotten or anything.Majority of the people involved in it or similar works are still alive if you just want to talk to them about it.It's not even without its faults or the best movie ever.What the FUCK happened to basic standards? It's like how retards just post frogs or w*jaks now, I genuinely don't get it. I'm not expecting every movie out there to be top tier either. How hard is it to hire like 5 competent guys in their departments to lead things?
>>181937629The things that are made now can only be ugly or somehow destructive. I think it's the law.
>>181937418Stupid sexy princess
>>181937629Partly because I think it's taught and mandated that things have to be ugly now, but also small men with small egos to protect won't just call up some of the guys who have stuff like this and say something like "hey I got this big movie budget here lemme fly you out here to the set to get your opinions on stuff and suggestions for how things should be shot." It's just guys not wanting to look like they don't know what they are doing so instead of picking the brains of the masters they just suck and say they are masters themselves
>>181937645There is something so purely good about this art. I'll get called an incel for saying this but it's a handsome man at his peak as a man, a beautiful woman at her peak as a woman and nude to display that, and a fearsome monster that must be slain. It really reaches into the root of humanity, at least the root of what makes up a man
>>181938146Yes, Human beauty and triumph. Things that are shit on regularly now.
>>181928111Hour of the Dragon and People of the Black Circle
>>181923417FUCK ARNOLD, HE SHOULD HAVE MADE KING CONAN WITH PAUL VERHOEVEN IN 2002 FOR THE ORIGINALS 20TH ANNIVERSARY WITH LOTR'S LEVEL SCALE, SCOPE AND FX, FUCK YOU!!!FACT!!!
>>181926110>Arnie is 75 and the possibilities of old King Conan are rapidly diminishingFUCK.
>>181925596The SK stories aren't as fun as Conan but it's definately where Howard flexed his writing muscles the hardest.It's a shame we'll never get a faithful screen adaptation because twitter would REEEE at what >>181926889 described.
>>181925987>>181925721god she was so fucking hot
>>181934641Based. Wish Milius didn't have his stroke and got round to making it. Such a sadness.
>>181928091Baab is good, but Nannan is stronger
>He loves his mother so much, he killed himself when his mother in a coma.
>>181923417Those rocks look lik styrofoam and Arnold sounds like a retard. This shit is stupid and the guys who like it are closet homosexuals.
>>181940999It's my Mom's favorite movie.
>>181932702You'd think a turok movie would be free money. Its Conan + Jurassic park, amazing Hollywood hasn't ruined it yet
>>181940999I bet I know what you look like.
>>181941156When we do get a Turok he'll be Black, Liberals do not give a fuck about Natives.
>>181934318Same, I'd love to run but my arches are so fucking high it's excruciating painful to, even with custom made arch supports
>>181937629Hiring 5 competent people means you can't hire 5 of your friends and family.
>>181929281Why does bottom right look like CGI?
>>181925987>>181925721she's just ridiculous holy shit
Arnold can still win an Oscar for King Conan
>>181938518Goddamn, those jugs in the background. LAWD HAVE MERCY.
You know, the OST of Conan is extremely similar to Mount & Blade games
>>181941664>“Nay, alone I am a weak creature, having no strength or might in me; yet in times past hath God made me a great vessel of wrath and a sword of deliverance. And I trust, shall do so again.”
>>181929770The only causality in the entire fight, the soup man who was also the first one killed.
Just watched this today again after years of not seeing it. It still kicks alot of ass.
>>181928188If I had to articulate a single intellectual throughline to all the Conan stories it would be:>wizards are cringe
>>181926023>One of the greatest soundtracks of all time starts playing
>>181931983He still fucks her
>>181925702I actually don't get that line
>>181943530How you treat people matters, you commie animal.
>Says flesh is stronger than steel>Makes a girl fall from a height>Girl dies while steel of that size would still be functionalDoom was dumb
does anyone have a link for the king conan script?
>>181935728What does this even mean? Most of Conan's fights are Howard s describing how got his muscles flex when he punches someone, not his ninja acrobatics bamboozling the opponent.
>>181945676>Most of Conan's fights are Howard s describing how got his muscles flex when he punches someoneYou haven't been paying attention.
>>181923417I watched Conan the barbarian upwards of probably fifty times when I was a kid.Despite this it did not make me any more like Conan.
i always enjoy any conan threads - on /v/, /tv/, or /tg/, because it brings out a comfy discussion. may your weekend be good, bros.
>>181937329what movie was this?
>>181941219There's not enough of them left to be worth pandering to.
>>181937387The thief? He was great.
>>181937329I remember always thinking that looked like dill pickle chip dip in that scene.
Quick before the thread dies, where do I start with Conan books? First book? Does it matter if I don't go at it chronologically?
>>181946759just get the anthology and read through each of the short stories if you want something that's a bit more physical.
>>181946759They're all individual stories, read them however you want. I think Beyond the Black River is a good start because he recaps his lifes journey and sheds small details about his early life in it, but they're all self contained
>>181924021Finding an endgame epic sword in the first cave you explore.
>>181946812That was lucky, but it was unlucky he had to spend the first 20 years of his life pushing a wheel
>>181941664Such a shame Solomon Kane movie basically got zero traction due to publishing shenanigans that lead to delayed screenings.
>>181928039>Bran Mak Mornholy shit, someone else knows about him? it will probably never happen since race plays such a big part in his mythos.
>>181946908Found this at a used book store for like 3$. >three best stories aren't even about BranGG Robert
Used to sneakily install this on people’s computers at workhttps://www.macintoshrepository.org/6686-conan-the-librarian
>>181926680To buy cryptoSee it pumpHear the lamentations of nocoiners