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>>
>>85004797
What is it with dark lord threads? Harems for the dark lord. Motivations for the dark lord. Now we have best minions for the dark lord!
>>
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>>85004797
Pig Orcs
Skeletons
The outcasts/forgotten races who have an axe to grind with humanity.
In that order.
Look grateful.
>>
>>85005067
Im still convinced that bumpfag is just some boogerman perpetuated by random anons to annoy other anons.
>>
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this motherfucker
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>>85004797
Evil Fighters
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>>85004797
Sinister goons, preferably captained by >>85005443
>>
>>85005099
Good take! Also whatever these little fuckers are called
>>
>>85004797
Does he create them or Recruit them? Did he gain his power legitimately or not? Is their loyalty guaranteed or does he have to maintain it? If he has to maintain it, is it through payment or through fear?
>>
>>85006165
Depends on the dark overlord I guess. Would you also ask questions like these if someone asked you what your favorite snack is? That being said naturally you can give an answer for each option if that suits your autism No offense I'm just joking
>>
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>>85005674
>Sinister goons
What about cackling ones?
>>
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>>85004797
Skeleton Warriors
>>
>>85005348
jannies seem to agree
>>85005412
good taste
>>
bat goblins
>>
>>85005348
The schizos shrieking about him constantly are way more disruptive than he is. Same thing with the people having spaz attacks about frog posters.
>>
>>85009986
seconded
>>
>>85004797
Blonde, blue eyed human males of northern European descent.
>>
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>>85004797
Depends on the overlord.
>>
>>85011705
I see what you did there
>>
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>>85004797
pic related
>>
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Personally I always loved the iron men from quest for camelot
>>
>>85014534
>Morale -3
good luck getting anything done
>>
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>>85014588
>>
>>85005099
>Pig Orcs
Wow fucked up right at the start
>>
>>85014883
if by fucking up you mean "nailed it" then yes he fucked up big time
>>
>>85005674
love these guys!
>>
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>>85004797
A group of Small Japanese Girls of Questionable Maturity who run a Demonic Pancake shop, whom Proceed to go on Wacky and Cute adventures in Hell.
>>
>>85004797
Humans. Cultists, dark knights, evil priests etc.
>>
>>85021464
may I say based
>>
Flying Monkeys
>>
>>85022825
>>
>>85022837
>>
>>85022846
>>
>>85022853
>>
>>85022869
>>
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>>85022825
>>85022837
>>85022846
>>85022853
>>85022869
>>85022883
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGU1P6lBW6Q
>>
>>85022939
Every villain of stature should have some wagnerian valkyrie apes
>>
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>>85004797
Defeated enemies, especially former heros.
>>
>>85023981
only if the get cool dark spiky armor
>>
>>85026461
*they
>>
>>85004797
Remember that as a Dark Lord, your villainous henchmen can have two of the following three qualities:

- Loyalty
- Numbers
- Competence

Choose wisely.
>>
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>>85027028
Numbers obviously
>>
>>85027057
Numbers and what else? Again, you can have two.

Do you go for competence? Your minions will be professional and capable…but also not necessarily willing to die for the cause, and they may even turn on you.

Or do you go for loyalty? You have a vast army that obeys your every command…and probably needs its numbers to make up for the fact that they’re almost as much a threat to themselves as they are to your enemies with their antics.

I posted Ursula because Flotsam and Jetsam demonstrate how useful it can be to have Loyalty and Competence but not Numbers. The two eels are probably the most effective evil minions in all of Disney. They succeed at every task Ursula gives to them. Plus it was fascinating that she seemed to genuinely like and care for them and was personally horrified when she accidentally killed them- she was just dicking around until that happened, afterwards is when she put her game face on.
>>
>>85005695
Seals?
>>
>>85027117
>Numbers and what else?
I pick numbers twice
>>
>>85027148
So an army of incomparable size but which couldn’t fight its way out of a paper bag and which will turn on you at the first opportunity and is prone to surrender and retreat.

I see you like to live dangerously.
>>
>>85027168
The army is a distraction, while it's off being incompetent and treacherous somewhere else I'm doing the important stuff
>>
>>85004797
Objectively, you need a group of fast-reproducing chaff that will be intimidated and respectful to you as the dark lord for your hordes. Next, you need some brains for the operation to direct the hordes and do bureaucracy and logistics. Evil or antagonistic human intelligence or above.
Lastly, you need a solid powerful core for your enforcers. Something that you can enforce loyalty for. Undead or other created beings would work here since you can guarantee their loyalty.
>>
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>>85027148
Came here to post this
>>
>>85027117
Two loyalty please
>>
>>85014883
shit for taste
>>
Darklings
>>
>>85004797
a bunch of these guys
>>
>>85005412
>>85005695
based
>>
What would be some fresh and not-overused minions?
>>
>>85006353
If you're trying to create a semi-realistic setting but still want to keep the image of an evil dark lord atop his throne surrounded by hundreds of loyal henchmen. You have to think about these sorts of things.
>>
>>85027028
Counterpoint? Kronk.
>>
>>85033938
Alright here we go:
>Does he create them or Recruit them?
Recruit
>Did he gain his power legitimately or not?
not
>Is their loyalty guaranteed or does he have to maintain it?
he hasto maintain it through fear?
through fear
>>
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>>85004797
Ghostly Wraiths
Skeletons and zombies
(Tolkien) Orcs
Goblins
Ogres
Wargs
Giant Bats
Dark Elves
A single giant Spider
Swarthy Eurasians
>>
>>85004797
Elves.
Anime elf sluts to be exact.
The dark lord wants to bring humans back to elf-land since the other elves see them as less than animals and violently oppress them.
>>
>>85033946
Kronk was not competent at doing his overlord's bidding.
>>
>>85004797
Chaos Dwarfs in full plate with projectile weapons, size change and psychic terror attacks.

players get too cocky.
>>
>>85027168
If they're incompetent their loyalty hardly matters. They wouldn't get the job done anyways and any attempt to betray me will poorly thought out.
>>
>>85036308
Kronk is neither competent or loyal and there's only one of him.
>>
>>85004797
Turtles.
>>
>>85037755
exactly
>>
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>>85038079
I like it.
>>
porcs
>>
>>85004797

Dwarves.

They build for the ages. They're experts at weaponsmaking and blending it with magic. They have no ambitions for world domination. Plus they make a mean brew.
>>
>>85004797
>ideal
Why bother? A Dark Overlord works with what he's got not what's ideal.
>>
a bunch of these guys
>>
>>85004797
Humans
>>
>>85022853
>>85022837
>>85022825
>>85022869
>>85022883
that's fucking terrifying and pure sword and sorcery kino
>>
>>85029692
'ey yous! Waddya think yer doin here bub?
>>
>>85007160
what a little cutie pie :D
>>
>>85005443
Evil fighter stabs you in bad way, while good fighter stabs you in a good way
>>
>>85004797
Competent
/thread
>>
>>85006165
Loyalty is maintained through a system of hierarchical vassalage, with the most favoured minions being vassals to the Dark Lord himself, while less favoured minions are vassals to the more favoured ones. This continues down the chain until you reach the dregmasters, who are tasked with driving vassal-less rabble to serve whatever ends their overlord requires.
>>
>>85027028
I choose numbers and competence
>>
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>>85027028
>Remember that as a Dark Lord, your villainous henchmen can have two of the following three qualities:
>- Loyalty
>- Numbers
>- Competence
>Choose wisely.
What KIND of Numbers are we talking here?
I mean Quantity can be a Quality all it's own after all, and with the loyal obedience of enough minions you could probably brute force most things...
But without Loyalty, controlling Numbers becomes more difficult, exponentially so if those Numbers are even semi-competent.
>>
>>85014588
Yeah, really fun concept
>>
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>>85027028
It all depends on if numbers means OVERHWELMING LEGIONS or like, 4 guys, and if the other stats scale the same.

Loyalty+numbers for classic fantasy settings, and for superhero settings I'll pick loyalty and competence.

Of course, if not picking loyalty simply means they bail when the shit hits the fan, having a army of competent minions is a great way to stop that shit from hitting in the first palce.
>>
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>>85049678
>Of course, if not picking loyalty simply means they bail when the shit hits the fan, having a army of competent minions is a great way to stop that shit from hitting in the first palce.
But it does beg the question "If they're so competent, why are YOU in charge?"
>>
>>85014883
>MY OPINION IS BETER THAN YOURS!
>>
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Troglodytes
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>>85048426
Is there some good illustrated art of these lads? Looking for the kind that one could use for a monster manual
>>
>>85044979
Seconded. Flying monkey are the best take so far imo
>>
>>85049713
yes.
>>
>>85004797
kobolds
>>
>>85006165
>creation is preferred but costly
>power is either given by subordinates or obtained illegitimately
>see the above for loyalty
>payment AND fear is most effective. Or better yet, pay somebody beneath you to make them afraid.
>>85005443
>>
>>85022853
>baboons
Ultimate goon.
>terrifying
>primal
>cheap
>trainable
>>
>>85027028
Or skeleton
>no competence
>no numbers
>withering loyalty
Oof
>>
>>85027057
Sleeping Beauty was pure kino and blows 90% of fantasy out of the water and you need to rewatch it if you disagree.
>>
>>85033946
>>85036308
>>85037755
Kronk is exceedingly competent at a multitude of disciplines and exceedingly loyal. He is just exceedingly grounded (as is Pacha's wife). While both heroes and villains scramble for dominance, he attends to duties and embraces the adventure of the moment with a positive and eager attitude, but is repeatedly unwilling to engage in any real escalated conflict. Kronk would be unstoppable as a wedding planner's henchman, or a charity organizer's henchman, or literally any profession that doesnt put him in a position of direct hostility toward others. He is a perfect henchman in the hands of an incapable and unstable overlord. If ezma weren't a paranoid cunt she could have easily dethroned her narcissistic emperor and ruled the known world with a few dinner parties and some gentle politicking. It's not Kronk's fault his boss was needlessly agressive in her approach to power.
>>
>>85005695
Apparently they're Canadians.
>>
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The disenfranchised members of society, who, upon being given money and status will remain forever loyal to the regime in return for their vices being treated as virtues!
>>
>>85052775
agreed
>>
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Mundane humans with grossly anachronistic styles and equipment.
>>
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Any good army needs sexy monsters. Succubi and barbarian hunks are outdated, most overlords have uncomfortably handsome beastmen nowadays.
>>
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Clone army of Ernest.
>>
>>85004797
If you want a good fantasy story?
>>85005099

If you personally had to be the dark overlord? I want to say "borderline hivemind insectoids."
>+adaptable in the long-term
>+perfect loyalty with drone mentality
>+easily mass-produced
>+teamwork proficiency
>-creativity
>-shared weaknesses; poison against one is poison against them all
>>
>>85050162
>>
>>85054933
>>
>>85054955
>>
>>85054964
>>
>>85054213
I'm the Dark Lord, and that's your world as I see it.
>>
>>85054933
>>85054955
>>85054964
>>85054982
Exactly what I was looking for. Thanks!
>>
Alright, so what is the ideal dark overlord to lead these minions?
>>
>>85056570
not the topic of this thread go make your own
>>
>>
>>85058892
ten flying monkeys and one hundred skeletons please!
>>
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>>85058892
Are the Undead and Mercenary $500 and $99 dollars respectively?!
Those Zombies are too damn high!
>>
>>85054213
I fear no man but this scares me
>>
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Imps
>>
>>85004797
Succubus in charge of PR
Slutty goblin administration
Short Stack dorf weapon and armor smiths
Short Stack halfling agricultural workers
Slutty elf ambassadors
Milf vampire assassin's
Athletic gym bunny orc enforcers
>>
>>85046595
>What KIND of Numbers are we talking here?

Whatever's large enough for the heroes to be obviously overwhelmed by the numbers. Like in Die Hard, for example, Hans has only like six or eight guys, but that's still enough that the number of opponents alone challenged McClane.
>>
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>>85062897
>Whatever's large enough for the heroes to be obviously overwhelmed by the numbers. Like in Die Hard, for example, Hans has only like six or eight guys, but that's still enough that the number of opponents alone challenged McClane.
But that assumes a base level of Competence for the minions to be a threat in the first place...
>>
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>>85014883
Pig orcs are classic low-tier ranged troops, anon.
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>>85060849
Sorry, anon, they unionized.
>>
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>>85004797
>>
>>85063930
Where is this from?
>>
>>85064097
A digital card game called Hex.
>>
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>>85063685
>Sorry, anon, they unionized.
Them or the Necromancers?
Because a regular mercenary only cost a fifth as much and they come with guns!
>>
>>85064111
thanks
>>
>>85064934
protip: union leaders can't give you any trouble when you put them on maternity leave
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>85064934
1 2 for the far left
3 4 for the center left
5 6 for the middle
7 8 for the center right
9 10 for the far right
>>
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Draugr
>>
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>>85065625
>protip: union leaders can't give you any trouble when you put them on maternity leave
You think that, and then they send thousands of skeletons after you...
>>
>>85065950
damn I wish that was me
>>
>>85058892
how much money do I have?
>>
>>85027028
everyone not taking numbers twice is a bad villain
>>
>>85052775
unfathomably based
>>
>>85005443
>Warduke is left-handed
How sinister
>>
>>85068827
You want your ass groped by skeletons?
>>
>>85074617
yes.
>>
>>85004797
I liked the Dark Elf from Dungeons 3 that the Great Evil Lord (you the player) corrupts immediately (shes basically the 1 hero unit you get) and she acts as your #1 goon who runs your evil dungeon empire and bosses your other goons around.

So in my opinion, yes have your little basic minions be neat but also you should have like a solid middle/upper-management person(s) beneath you. Perhaps a sorcerer of decent skill but weak will, or a warrior who is strong and can bully your tougher goons but hes too stupid to turj on you. Or a slut. Just a slut cus sluts get shit done.
>>
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>>85074530
>>85074661
>Or a slut. Just a slut cus sluts get shit done.
Why can't ALL your minions be slutty AND Corrupted to your side?!
>>
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>>85033871
You know, I've never seen anybody have a legion of oozes and slimes, maybe try that out?
You could have the hierarchy be basic nonshaped, blobby slimes on the bottom with just enough intelligence to follow orders, and the higher up you go and the smarter they get, the more "humanoid" their form.
Maybe even have the Overlord's two right hand dudes look like normal people but actually be superintelligent slimes that can perfectly disguise themselves as humans! If the players have a boss fight against them, it would be cool to have these perfect mimic slimes be able to shift into a ton of different monsters to try and stomp the players flat using a wide variety of different abilities and powers.
>>
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>>85075908
>You know, I've never seen anybody have a legion of oozes and slimes, maybe try that out?
I think because they'd all glom together, creating a giant soupy super slime...
>>
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>>85075967
I mean, that's an absolute win in my book!
Is your legion of basic slimes losing a battle? Have them all combine together to form a single superslime and improve their chances in battle!
Maybe even throw different color ones in there to form a weird fusion giant slime with unique properties.
Or maybe fusing a bunch of different slime types would create something like the Tar from Slime Rancher, where it's just this inky, oily blob that eats everything in a violent rampage. Might be a good last resort to throw at a party of heroes/a countryside if you feel like you're losing or want to clear out some land!
>>
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>>85027028
numbers and numbers please
>>
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>>85033871
trees
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>>85073134
>everyone not taking numbers twice is a bad villain
>>85076626
>numbers and numbers please
Again we don't know how much one "Numbers" is, your minions might be numerous enough to end up collapsing into a black hole...
>>
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>>85027028
>>85046268
>I choose numbers and competence
ok but then you just get betrayed
>>
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>>85076105
But how do we know you and your minions are a bunch of individual slimes united under one banner, and not just ONE Big slime divided into many small parts?

>>85076860
>ok but then you just get betrayed
Indeed, again "If they're so Competent, why are YOU in charge?"
>>
>>85005412
unholy based
>>
>>85076769
>your minions might NOT be numerous enough to end up collapsing into a black hole
No way to take it a third time, huh?
>>
>>85076890
The real answer is that there is no difference in terms of whether or not we're individuals split apart from one great slime or a bunch of individual slimes working together because through unity to a common cause, individuals combine their efforts together to create a stronger unit already, much like a slime.
The social contract is, in short, a metaphor for sliminess as a whole, and on a cosmological scale we can say that we're all both individuals united in and divided FROM the larger universe, so really it's both simultaneously. We are all individual slimes forming a massive slime that then subdivides and creates more individual slimes from it.
This is all to say that the big bad should 100% have a giant Ur-Slime that lives in the basement and is where all of their slime minions are derived from
>>
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>>85079998
>This is all to say that the big bad should 100% have a giant Ur-Slime that lives in the basement and is where all of their slime minions are derived from
A "Mother-of-all-Slimes" if you will?
>>
>>85080161
Precisely that! A Matronly Masterslime that spews out a legion of thousands of smaller slimes of all shapes, sizes, and elemental attunement would be truly the ideal minion!
>>
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It's easy to describe your ideal minion, but everyone knows your average evil overlord's ultimate downfall is logistical.
Even an army of ghouls and slimes marches on its stomach(s), and you can't rely on foraging for all of your needs (especially if your home base is a blasted volcanic wasteland). Why not put some of your treasure hoard towards hiring top-class sausagemeisters?
>>
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>>85076860
>ok but then you just get betrayed
If I keep on winning, what reason do they have to turn on me.
I just need a competent Lieutenant, that holds their respect and I'm good.
>>
>>85081621
That's even worse than having minions who aren't loyal to anybody. He'll have you overthrown within the space of a week.
>>
>>85081719
The trick is getting one of them competent but lacking in imagination Lieutenants.
The sort who takes pride in a job well done but wouldn't know what to do without someone giving them orders.
>>
>>85082062
Those sorts of characters don't have leadership skills or inspire loyalty though. There's a reason real world people like that live at headquarters pushing paper instead of becoming line officers.
>>
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>>85080659
>Precisely that! A Matronly Masterslime that spews out a legion of thousands of smaller slimes of all shapes, sizes, and elemental attunement would be truly the ideal minion!
But why should SHE be the Minion and not THE MASTER!

>>85081513
>Why not put some of your treasure hoard towards hiring top-class sausagemeisters?
What good is a sausagemeister if we don't have huge tracks of (farm) land tended to by our peasant subjects?!
>>
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>>85082481
>But why should SHE be the Minion and not THE MASTER!
Simple, it's because She's sworn to your side as your bride and companion
>>
>>85074578
that is literally the pun that was being made with him
>>
>>85081513
I wish that was me
>>
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>>85052775
Rewatched it recently and I fully agree. I didn't remember the asthetics to be this fantastic, specially the backgrounds. Traditionally animated Disney movies put a lot of effort on capturing the style of the era they're based on. It's specially noticeable in this movie, Mulan, Hercules and others.
>>
>>85004797
Depends on the dark lord, nani.
>>
I'm a fan of shoddy artificial minions. Like cheery fleshcrafted homunculi that melt after three weeks of life. Or cheap robots.
>>
skaven
>>
>>85005412
I'M HORNY
>>
>>85049678
numbers means at one point the heroes will have to shout "There's too many of them!"
>>
doesn't matter as long as there are many of them
>>
>>85052775
>>85053973
>>85074530
>>85088015
Sleeping Beauty chads unite!
>>
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>>85075336
>>85096595
...Chads?



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