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File: 1.png (392 KB, 1674x1614)
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WARNING, this is a VERY malicious and dark quest. It is not at all suitable for all ages. You must be of at least [47] man cycles to safely read this quest. Consider yourself INFORMED and CONSENTING!
>>
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You are the Dark knight, born in the witching hour, in the heart of winter, on the shortest day, during a lunar eclipse, in a dark hovel, in the darkest forest, to the cruellest mother, and the evilest father. Over the days of your horrifically long life, you have become so evil, so twisted, and so wicked that there is no way anyone could ever self insert as you. So, in an attempt to make you relatable enough to get this quest a few players, its best that your name is chosen by the players themselves.

Your name is…

>Sunny
>Ichabod
>Brom
>write in (+1 story point)
>>
Odysseus, because you have a luck about as good as his
>>
>>5014914
+1

>>5014911
We better fuck that ghost girl by the end... HikkiQM?
>>
>>5014912
Bobby
>>
>>5014912
>Scunny
>>
>>5014911
>ghost girl with a shelf ass
unf

>>5014914
+1.
>>
>>5014914
+1

>>5014911
Nice job with the names from the headless horseman.
Also why did you give the ghost a Pixar dumptruck?
>>
>>5014912
>>Sunny
>>
>>5014914
Support
>>
>>5014912
>>5014914
Absolutely support
>>
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Odysseus, yes, that is your name, very marketable, very good. Well, Its’ just about time for you to burst out of your coffin and face the day. Its a very important day indeed, because its the first day of the mo- GREAT LUCIFER'S GHOST! Its the second already? You slept in! Your lairmate was supposed to wake you damn it. Ugggh, what a terrible start to a very high profile quest. To make matters worse, you are feeling terrible. Not the good terrible either, the bad terrible. You have a horrible SPLITTING headache. How Wonderfully terrible, but not for you, for me.
>>
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With a hop, skip, and a tumble, you make your way to your decrepit bathroom and give yourself a look over. Ah yes, there he is, the motherfucker responsible for all your problems. Something feels off however. You are not sure what, but there is definitely something missing. You check your body and yes, the spiders and lice are all there. Damn, if only you could think straight.

>what do?
- Look around your room, maybe it will jog your memory
- Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and allow them to assist you
- Punch the mirror, figuratively assaulting yourself.
- Write in (1 story point required)
- Realize your head is missing (5 story points required)
>>
>>5014969
- Look around your room, maybe it will jog your memory
>>
>>5014969
>Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and "allow" them to assist you
CONSCRIPTION POINT GO GO GO
>>
>>5014969
>- Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and allow them to assist you
>>
>>5014969
>- Punch the mirror, figuratively assaulting yourself.
>>
>>5014969
- Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and allow them to assist you
what's up ya wankas
>>
>>5014969
- Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and allow them to assist you
>>
>>5014969
>Barge into your Lairmates dungeon and allow them to assist you

And then we extract our fiery brimstone retribution on them for being the worst alarm clock ever.
>>
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You consider giving your room a look over, and maybe even assaulting your grand mirror, but it is only the passing fancy of a very unfancy gentleman such as yourself. Good thing too, because the [Evil Mirror]’s got hands and whenever you are ready to throw down i'll be waiting for you to step into the octagon. I'll toss you all over this room like your horrible fat mother tossed you on your head as a baby.
>>
File: 7.png (373 KB, 1713x1857)
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Instead you kick down your Lairmates door and barge right in. The [Sorceress] gives you a look like she has no idea who you are, but then smiles when she remembers. She now looks very pleased to see you.

“Your Darkness, to what do I owe the pleasure of your bleak company?”

You have no time for horribleries and immediately accuse her of doing something to mess with you. You don’t have any evidence, and can’t think of any motive, but you didn't become the [Black Knight] by following due process. You ready your good slapping gloves, and give her the count to five to come clean.

She gives you a look over.

“Hmmm… You are coming up a bit short today... Ah!”

She has a look of an epiphany.

“I think I know what ails you my dark lord, and I am willing to tell you. Yet my services don’t come free, perhaps you can solve a problem for me first?”

>What Do?
- You will hear her out. You can appreciate a good leverage play. (+1 story point)
- NO DEAL, you will figure this out yourself (+1 story point)
- Give her rump a good SLAP (FREE ACTION)(-2 [Sorceress] FP)
- Story moving forward WRITE IN
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sorceress] FP)
>>
when will we get dark fantasy quest again
>>
>>5015048
>- "Is it my legs? I'm pretty sure it's my legs, I heard my knees pop when I was doing squats last night."
>- You will hear her out. You can appreciate a good leverage play. (+1 story point)
>>
>>5015048
- You will hear her out. You can appreciate a good leverage play. (+1 story point)
Fair enough
>>
>>5015048
>- Give her rump a good SLAP (FREE ACTION)(-2 [Sorceress] FP)
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sorceress] FP)

Thanks for noticing my haircut babe!
>>
>>5015053
Support
>>
>>5015053
+1
>>
>>5015053
Watch as this become the canon reason as to why we are always stanced up
>>
>>5015091
Arthritis, it strikes when you least expect.
>>
>>5015053
This, also

>Take her boots so you can fix that height problem. They look better on you anyhow.

Art is pretty dang good.
>>
>>5015121
Seems like a good idea since her boots are bigger than ours. Make us taller!
>>
>>5015131
But then her ass won't look as good...
>>
File: 8.png (133 KB, 950x912)
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She noticed it right away, does that mean it’s really obvious? Right under your nose yet you can’t see it. Well, you always were a big picture kind of guy after all. Yet you can’t help but take a guess at it.

“Is it my legs? I'm pretty sure it's my legs, I heard my knees pop when I was doing squats last night.”

She gives you a shrewd smile and flicks the lint off your shoulder. “Come now, no guessing! Will you do it or won’t you? Come on, I reeeeally need the help of my big strong Knight in dark armour.”

Well, you suppose you could at least listen to her request. What's the physically gruesome harm in hearing someone out?

“Well, im brewing up something big, and wouldn’t you know it, I reach for the Jar of scorpion tail and i'm all out! Not a stinger in the lair. I need someone to run on down to the catacombs and fetch me a fresh tail. Not just any scorpion either, I need a GOLDEN scorpion tail. Then I'll help you with your problem.”

Ah, now you get it. She can’t do it herself because the [sorceress] is frienamies with the [Sphinx] and the [Aqrabuamelu]. That's why she is sending you.

>What do?
- Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
- Agree, you will confront the [Aqrabuamelu] (Dice based combat)
- Disagree, you are no errand boy (-1 [Sorceress] FP)
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
>>5015431
>- Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
>>
>>5015431
>Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
>>
>>5015431
>- Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
>- Agree, you will confront the [Aqrabuamelu] (Dice based combat)

Whichever is the hotter one.

> - Give her rump a good SLAP (FREE ACTION)(-2 [Sorceress] FP)
>>
>>5015431
>Agree, you will confront the [Aqrabuamelu] (Dice based combat)
We never really had a head for riddles.
>>
>>5015431
>- Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
>>
>new nigger quest
>>
>>5015431
>- Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat
>>
>>5015431
>Agree, you will confront the [Sphinx] (Riddle based combat)
>Coerce her to come with us and properly introduce us to the Sphinx
>>
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Alright, alright, no more goofing around. You accept her request and turn right around. Its been a eon since you have been in the crypt and maybe a sweep through the place will remind everyone who is in charge. Dismembering multiple birds with one jagged stone.

The [Sorceress] blows you a kiss goodbye. "Go get em' tiger."

She seems slightly disappointed. Who knows what a woman is thinking, its best not to dwell on it and push the story forward.
>>
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You arrive in the crypts and everything is very sandy, just like you left it. You walk straight, then turn at the great pyramids until you walk right onto the [Sphinx]. Stopping to see nothing, and refusing to speak with the skeletons. Speed running this quest, no survivors.

The [Sphinx] feels your presence.
"Meaow-wow. Its been a while since you cast a shadow on my door, perhaps you would have better luck when the sun is REALLY low in the sky? The peeeeerfect joke, please enjoy it"

You have no time for banter, you demand to be giv...

"The golden scorpion tail, I know. I'm the [sphinx] after all. If you want it, you got to answer my riddle. But if you fail, ill gobble you up."

>what do?
- You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
- Fight the [sphinx] instead, this story needs some ACTION (+1 Story points)
- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Before you decide anything, go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (-1 Story points)
- Write in (-1 Story points)
- Realize your head is missing (5 story points required)
>>
>>5016094
> Ask the Sphinx to step on you
>>
>>5016094
- You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
What da cat doing
>>
>>5016094
>Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP) (FREE ACTION)
>Fight the [sphinx] after, this story needs some ACTION (+1 Story points)
>>
>>5016094
>You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
May as well.
>>
>>5016106
+1
>>
>>5016094
>You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
>>
>>5016094
>- You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
>>
>>5016106
>>5016137
sounds gay

you should be aiming for the full ankha experience
>>
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"Do-nyaa nyaa, tricking others is TOO EASY. Ok Mister soon to be lunch, lets see if you can solve this one:

I have many forms, because one size doesn't always fit all
Some will love me, some will hate me, some will worship me and some will collect me..."
>>
File: 11.png (156 KB, 1279x706)
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...
>>
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"...Those that seek me, sometimes pay a fortune to have me
Yet every new season, you are almost sure to forget me.

What am I?"
>>
>What do?
- Answer
- FIGHT
>>
>>5016178
>Yet every new season, you are almost sure to forget me.
Fucking hell, this is throwing me off.
>>
>>5016196
"Woman" and "pussy" fits all of those except the "every new season" criteria. I think focusing on seasonal things first then everything else second is the way to go.
>>
>>5016179
Anime?
>>
>>5016176
>>5016178
>ANSWER
>"WAIFUS"
Flavor of the month, anyone?
>>
>>5016178
>Whey-eh-fuus?
>>
>>5016179
>Answer
Waifus.
>>
>>5016215
Genius. Supporting waifus as the answer.
>>
>>5016094
- You will attempt the trial of the riddle (+1 [Sphinx] FP)
- Fight the [sphinx] instead, this story needs some ACTION (+1 Story points)
- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)

Pet that ass!
>>
>>5016179
>- Answer

Rain. Also could be snow.

>- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
> - Give her rump a good SLAP
>>
>>5016231
You can't pay for rain. You can splurge for your waifu in many ways.
>>
>>5016179
Waifus makes sense, FOTMs are a sad fact.
>>
>>5016179
Waifus. Just draw porn already you retarded QM
>>
>>5016233
My first choice was water, but you don't forget water in a season. Hence the rain.
>>
>>5016263
But you don't pay for water, though. And rain doesn't fit people, so the phrase 'one size doesn't always fits all' wouldn't work.
>>
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>>5016265
You give her your answer: "a Waifu"

...
>>
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"Huh? You're still here? Oh! Yeah you got it. The life of a waifu is glamorous but short lived. So easily forgotten."

Now that you have slew this pussy, you obviously want to get your scorpion. Unfortunately, your mummy is in another tomb. The Sphinx gives you a voucher for one free Golden scorpion to be redeemed at the [Aqrabuamelu] shop.

"Of course the [Aqrabuamelu] would have the scorpion? Wasn't it obvious?"

>what do
- Get mad, a voucher was NOT part of the deal. you demand recompense (specify) (-1 Story points)
- Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Realize your head is missing (5 story points required)
>>
>>5016278
- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>>
>>5016278
>- Grumble a bit.
>- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>- Get the hell out of there when she realizes what we're doing.
>>
>>5016278
>- Get mad, a voucher was NOT part of the deal. you demand recompense (her pussy) (-1 Story points)
>- Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
>- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)

>>5016265
You pay for water in the desert, anon. Water isn't a retarded answer, you're lucky this is a coomer quest so the waifu answer makes sense.
>>
>>5016286
People don't pay for rain, fool. For water, but not for rain. And you don't forget water on every season.
>>5016278
- Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
>>
>>5016278
Fooqin ell.
>Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
I don't know what FP means but I could only assume it refers to favour.
>>
>>5016278
>Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
I'd recommend drop kicking her but... stroy pants broz...
>>
>>5016289
But people do pray for rain, and pay for water. And you forget about rain for a season, you dumb coomer.
>>
>>5016306
I said pay, not pray. You don't pay for rain. You pay for water. You can't have two answers.
>>
>>5016314
Then water is the better answer than rain, as you can't have rain without water.
>>
>>5016316
But you don't forget water on the next season.
>>
>>5016278
>- Get mad, a voucher was NOT part of the deal. you demand recompense (her pussy) (-1 Story points)
>- Go see what the [Aqrabuamelu] has to offer. (+1 Story points)
>- Pet the kitty, pet the kitty (-2 [Sphinx] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>>
File: 12.png (86 KB, 585x463)
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You pet the kitty, she hates it and you lose any chances of any kind of positive relationship with the [Sphynix]. In the future you should spend more time concentrating on the narrative plot of this quest and stop trying to go off the grid and persuing waifus.

Now, you turn yourself around and get back into gear. We have the mcguffin that will allow us to get the scorpion from the [Aqrabuamelu].
>>
File: 13.png (192 KB, 1645x1003)
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You low tail it over the pyramid and across the river to the spot where the [Sorceress] told you to find the [Aqrabuamelu]. Yet she is nowhere to be seen. A sudden shifting below your feet betrays an ambush, so you draw your black blade of despair hopekiller. As you do, a giant scorpion bursts from the sand!

"WHO HAS ENTERED MY KINGDOM? SPEAK OR FACE DEATH!" it shrieks!

>What do?
- Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
- Present voucher
- Rub the scorpion pecs (-2 [Aqrabuamelu] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Aqrabuamelu] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Realize your head is missing (5 story points required)
>>
>>5016441
>Banter: "Damn, woman, you've got the biggest pair of claws I've ever laid eyes upon."
>Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
The joke, of course, is that we have no eyes.
>>
>>5016441
>DRAMATIC POSE
>Present voucher
>I DARE TO ENTER
>>
>>5016441
>Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
>>
>>5016441
>- Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
>- Present voucher
>- Rub the scorpion pecs (-2 [Aqrabuamelu] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>>
>>5016441
>Banter: "Damn, woman, you've got the biggest pair of claws I've ever laid eyes upon."
>Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
>Present voucher AFTER we win

Welcome back, Sojourner
>>
>>5016501
Shhh, you'll scare him away.
>>
>>5016501
+1
>>
>>5016440
>she hates it and you lose any chances of any kind of positive relationship with the [Sphynix]. In the future you should spend more time concentrating on the narrative plot of this quest and stop trying to go off the grid and persuing waifus
>(the picture shows her liking it and +1 FP)
You fucking lying cunt. I hate you more with every post
>>
>>5016441
>Banter: "Damn, woman, you've got the biggest pair of claws I've ever laid eyes upon."
>Assert dominance, FIGHT! (+1 story point)
>Present voucher AFTER we win
Let's rock. This quest is still fun though
>>
>>5016691
This. What the fuck is wrong with you OP?
>>
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Ok, real talk, those are the biggest claws you have ever seen. You feel a tingle at the tip of your sword just thinking about the coming kerfuffle. You can't help but attempt to articulate how big they are with words of praise, snappers like those deserve to be mounted on a wall somewhere. You don't get hellhounds like those by sitting infront of the TV.

"Damn, woman, you've got the biggest pair of claws I've ever laid eyes upon."

"ALL THE BETTER TO SNIPPITY SNIP ALL PRETENDERS TO THE THRONE OF THE SHIFTING SANDS!!! WILL YOU KNEEL?"
>>
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You would have to be a madman to refuse a massive and powerful creature such as the [Aqrabuamelu], very few men have lived to tell of such tales. Its just that you have been doing a lot of squats lately and it has left a rather nasty cramp in your leg. So kneeling is out of the question today.

"YOU HAVE ELECTED THE PATH OF DISMEMBERMENT"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM

The [Aqrabuamelu] takes a POWER STANCE and gives you a great view of the sun rising above the great dunes of Giza. Then ATTACKS!

>ROLL a 1d20 for combat!
>>
Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>5016906
She might just be the one kneeling when we're done
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>5016910
>>
Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>5016906
Watch this bitch crit.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d20)

>>5016923
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>5016906
Come on baby
>>
Rolled 1 (1d20)

>>5016929
>>
>>5016929
Oooooo
>>5016931
NONONONO AHAHAHHAA GOTTEM
>>
Rolled 1 (1d20)

>>5016937
>>5016929
>>5016931
Sasuga dice gods, I kneel
>>
>>5016939
you there. Stop rolling. Forever
>>
Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>5016939
WHY
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>5016939
Why the fuck would you still roll, dumbass
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM

The [Aqrabuamelu] is the type to name her attacks and shout them out as she does them.

"SHIFTING SANDS MIRAGE TECHNIQUE!"

The [Aqrabuamelu]'s explosion of speed takes you by surprise! The sand obeys her direction and its as if she is hydroplaning on top of it! She moves so quickly that you are surrounded by afterimages! You strike out against her with your wraithsword AngeBane and hit nothing but empty space! You are quickly re-payed for you misstep with a venous stinger into your back!

"LOWER KINGDOM VENOUS STRIKE"

You may be resistant to poison, but it still hurts like a cronefucker as the venom explodes through your body!

You won't make a mistake like that again. You focus and let your wicked blade CorpseMaker help guide your actions! There are many illusions here but there is only ONE real NECK to chop! Like a guided missile you swing your sword right for the [Aqrabuamelu] head!

Unfortunately you are still rusty, its been a while since you did any real battle... The [Aqrabuamelu] is able to absorb your blow by shifting her soft human body and taking the hit on her armoured chitin plating! Its not impervious however, and the vile scorpion blood sprays over your body.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VNECeIUOt0

The spilling of blood triggers you, and you once again find yourself on a battlefield dicing up both Englishmen and American revolutionaries. You never cared which head you severed so long as you were payed and there was carnage to be diced out. You lopped off head after head in your endless quest to paint the world in red.

The [Aqrabuamelu] takes the full brunt of your madness and feels the wrath of your frightful cutlass Mortuarizer. You cut cut cut until she slows down enough for you to climb up onto her back. You raise your sword and ready the final strike!

>what do?
- Claim the [Aqrabuamelu]'s head
- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
>>
>>5016991
>- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
We have shown our dominance. NOW YOU ARE THE ONE WHO WILL KNEEL
>>
>>5016991
>- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
>>
>>5016991
- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
>>
>>5016991
- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
FRIENDSHIP!
>>
>>5016991
>Claim the [Aqrabuamelu]'s head
We gotta fill our evil quota, besides, if we can live without a head she can too.
>>
>>5017081
+1
Finally, someone speaking sense.
>>
>>5016991
Take her hat
>>
>>5016991
Backing >>5017081
>>
>>5016991
>- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)

We need minions if we wish to rule, and she’d be a hell of a good enforcer.
>>
>>5016991
>- Spare the [Aqrabuamelu] (-1 story point)
>>
>>5016991
Spare her.
>>
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Its HARD to decide. On one hand, your business has not yet been concluded with the women and on the other the joy of disembowelling. You take a FULL MINUTE to wight your options. The [Aqrabuamelu] waits patiently for you to make up your mind at first, but when she starts to feel up your pecs you decide to just make the call and let her keep her head. However, she must RESPECT your authority, you make that very clear.

"I bequeath my crown to you oh merciful dark lord" She drops her overbearing shouting in exchange for a respectful low tone.

You climb off her back and your midnight blade "MonochromeCutter" weeps at your decision. I on the other hand applaud your decision to allow the quest to keep its PG-13 rating.

"I am thankful that you have spared my life lord, but why have you come here if not to mount my pincers onto your wall?"

You show her your voucher and ask to be given a Golden scorpion.

"Ah! A customer! Why didn't you say so earlier!!!"
>>
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The [Aqrabuamelu] exits stage right and when the camera pans over you see her standing behind a small stall of various goods

"Step right up, step right up! We got the best goods in Cairo. Need a new spear? A statue to the gods? Instant noodles? WE GOT IT!"

Thank you, just the scorpion please.
>>
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"How about this antique vase? Cleopatra's personal chamber pot! Gift from Alexander the Great himself! Its a steal for only THREE HUNDRED GOLD PIECES! I'm basically GIVING IT AWAY at these prices"

We really only need the sco...
>>
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"You're right, the vase? WORTHLESS! I can see you got a good eye. Here we have Count DraKivla's VERY OWN SWORD! Stolen from his castle! imprinted with the screaming souls of one thousand men!"

She uses the sword to slice a tomato in half then presents both sides of the blade

"Wow, such a clean cut, you simply WILL NOT find such quality material on this plane of existence."

>What do
- Buy something (+1 [Aqrabuamelu] FP)
- Just get your scorpion and go (+1 story point)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Aqrabuamelu] FP)(FREE ACTION)

- Realize your head is missing (5 story points required)
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
>>5017151
>Banter
"You know, that's a double-edged sword. You should really be setting your MSRP at double, and calling it HALF-OFF."

>Buy a badass cursed amulet or something, and get that scorpion
>>
>>5017153
+1
>>
>>5017153
+1

If we do actually get a necklace etc
"Just put it on over our head and oh huh it fell off clasp must be loose" And just keep fiddling until it stays on
>>
>>5017151
>- Buy something (+1 [Aqrabuamelu] FP)
>- Just get your scorpion and go (+1 story point)
>>
>>5017153
+1
>>
>>5017153
Sounds good to me.
>>
>>5017153
+1
>>
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"You know, that's a double-edged sword. You should really be setting your MSRP at double, and calling it HALF-OFF."

"You WANT SALES? We GOT sales! You look like a man who encounters MANY women! Well right now we have a HALF OFF SALE on this EXQUISITE cursed amulet! Half off? I mean TWO THIRDS OFF!!! Give this to the lady you are SWEET on and she CAN'T SAY NO!"

You get the feeling this will never end so you buy the amulet. Maybe you can give it to a lady you fancy down the road or something, or perhaps wear it yourself? Buying the amulet and slipping the voucher in while you are at it nets you a CURSED AMULET and a GOLDEN SCORPION.

Your quest in the crypt is complete and you can return to the [Sorcerress].

>what do?
- Return to the [Sorcerress] posthaste (+1 story point)
- Write in
>>
>>5017891
>Give her the amulet, then ask her if she wants to hold pincers with you.

Okay, but seriously:
- Return to the [Sorcerress] after thinking about holding pincers with Aqrabuamelu (+1 story point)
>>
>>5017904
Support, and scritch the Sphinx on the way back.

>>5017891
>>
>>5017891
- Return to the [Sorcerress] posthaste (+1 story point)
oke less go
>>
>>5017904
+1
>>
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You spend a moment imagining yourself holding pincers with the [Aqrabuamelu], aaah what a life you could live if only you had the GUTS to ask her out on a date. Oh well, its probably better to just continue the main narrative and put this all behind you. She would have turned you down anyway.

The [Aqrabuamelu] waves you goodbye, completely oblivious to the hyper lewd thoughts you were having.
>>
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You give the [Sphinx] a pet and scratch on your way back. She HATES that! You probably shouldn't do that again!
>>
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Its a bit of a trip back to your lair, but eventually you do manage to ascend the stair case and leave the Egypt theme section of this quest behind you. After stopping to shake all the sand out of your clothing, you enter the [Sorceress]'s workshop. It seems you have unintentionally sneaked up on her. She is working on something that has all her attention.

>what do?
- Deliver the Scorpion as requested and get your reward!
- Give her rump a good SLAP (FREE ACTION)(-2 [Sorceress] FP)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sorceress] FP)
>>
>>5018174
>DROPKICK ASS
>Deliver the Scorpion as requested and get your reward!
>Gaslight her into thinking that you didn't just deliver a bone crushing double dropkick
>>
>>5018174
>Trip and plant your face into the SORCERESS' fat ass.
>Equip her as your new head in the same fluid motion.
>Present scorpion and demand cooperation from your newest appendage-acquisition.
>>
>>5018174
>- Deliver the Scorpion as requested and get your reward!
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Sorceress] FP)
Hey I got some tail just like you asked, attempt eyebrow wiggle, scorpions still attached for extra freshness
>>
>>5018174
>- Deliver the Scorpion as requested and get your reward!
Twas not even a trifle
>>
>>5018174
>Slap her ass to get her attention
Then:
>>5018191
This.
>>
>>5018174
- Deliver the Scorpion as requested and get your reward!
- Give her rump a good SLAP (FREE ACTION)(-2 [Sorceress] FP)

>>5018224
This also works.
>>
>>5018224
Sure.
>>
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You animal, you simply cant control yourself huh? You see two freshly baked buns laid out before you, and you have to slap em. Well, you do it alright. With one swift motion you clap those cheeks.

"Ah~!"

The [Sorceress] turns and gives you a disgusted look. She hates you now for sure. Please try to pay more attention to the suggested narrative prompts.

"Back already my dark knight? I should have know you would make quick work of my little task."
>>
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You give the [Sorceress] her scorpion, and demand the information she was with holding.

"You are missing your head, its gone"
>>
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what?
>>
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By the Spear of Longinus! She's right, you head is GONE again.

>What do?
- FREAK OUT
- Get DEPRESSED
- Take your anger out on the [Sorceress]
- Look for a temporary replacement head
- Write in
>>
>>5018368
>- Take your anger out on the [Sorceress]
>>
>>5018368
>FREAK OUT
Well where could it be?
>>
>>5018368
>FREAK OUT
>"WHAT."
>>
>>5018368
>FREAK OUT
Swear vengeance upon whoever has stolen your head
>>
>>5018368
>FREAK OUT

No Head?.....

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
>>
>>5018368
>Freak out and swear vengeance
>>
>>5018364
>The [Sorceress] turns and gives you a disgusted look. She hates you now for sure. Please try to pay more attention to the suggested narrative prompts.
>PICTURES STILL SAY +1 FP
YOU FUCKING LYING BITCH SOJOURNER
YOU WANT US TO GO OFF-RAILS WAIFU-CHASING IN YOUR COCKTEASE FOTM TRASH QUEST
SAME AS ALL YOUR OTHER COCKTEASE FOTM TRASH QUESTS
FUUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>>5018368
>FREAK OUT
Understandably react by freaking out
>>
>when you go hard on squats so much your head pops off after your knees explode
>>
>>5018368
>- FREAK OUT
>>
>>5018368
>- Take your anger out on the [Sorceress]
>>
>>5018368
>- Take your anger out on the [Sorceress]’s ass
>>
>>5018368
>- FREAK OUT
>Try and remember what happened last time.
>>
>>5018368
>Freak out
>>
>>5018368
- Look for a temporary replacement head
PUMPKIN
- FREAK OUT
>>
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Just stay calm and...
>>
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
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aaaaaaaahhhh!
>>
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
>>
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>Ok, now what
- Ride out in search for your head immediately
- Find a replacement head, you cant stand to go outside and be seen headless
- Sulk
- Ask/Demand the [Sorceress] for assistance
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
>>5018939
- Find a replacement head, you cant stand to go outside and be seen headless
And then
- Ask/Demand the [Sorceress] for assistance
>>
>>5018942
+1
>>
>>5018942
This
>>
>>5018942
+1, but we've got the general location of where our head should be in her lap, using it as a pillow while she comforts us.
>>
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>what do?
>>
>>5019012
Test each of the heads by seeing how each of them feel when we place them on the sorceress's lap.
>>
>>5019012
I got an idea for a write-in, how about a White Cue Ball with the Number 13?
>>
>>5019023
+1
Make sure it crackles
>>
>>5019016
+1
>>
>>5019012
Cursed Helm of Drakness.
>>
>>5019016
+1
>>
>>5019012
Easy. Put the skull into the helmet and mash the pumpkin and put the goo onto it.
>>
>>5019016
Can we also test the White Thirteen Ball?

I think it'd look neat on Odyseus, and a smooth ball might be able to feel thighs better.
>>
>>5019023
+1
>>
>>5019016
>>5019074
Both of these, please. Support +1.
>>
>>5019023
+1 but with a cowboy hat
>>
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Alright we have some options here: The helmet, the Q ball, and the pumpkin. You can't say any of them feel "right" however. Nothing feels as good as wearing ones own head. Yet you have to pick something. You know at some point in this quest you are going to have to toss your own flaming head at someone in dramatic fashion and you don't want to be caught unprepared.
>>
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You ask the [Sorceress] to assist you in testing out your plethora of heads in the way only she can.

"Oh? Does my big malicious man hunter need the help of little old me? Well of course, If its you how could I ever refuse?"
>>
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You feel a wave of force stopping your forward motion and the [Sorceress]'s legs snap shut.

"Actually, now that I think about it, I may know what happened to your head. You see five days ago I had the girls over for a little get together. It was me, the [Vampire], the [Warlock], and the [Mad Hatter]. I distinctly remember the [Vampire] wanted to see your coffin! I had forgotten something on the cauldron and had to step out. Any one of them could have taken it."

Those are some big names, all three of those villains are major players in these parts. They could be using your head as some kind of POWER PLAY to take complete control of the Cursed Wood. They have been trying to usurp each other since you as long as you remember. Its not at all out of the realm of possibility that they may have taken your head. Who else but them would have the POWER to open your coffin in the first place.

Thats three names, you swear on Dick Cheneys decrepit ghost that you will burn this entire forest to the ground if it means being reunited with your head. This bitches have crossed the WRONG dark knight in their endless attempts to one up each other.
>>
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"if you're going out, maybe you can pick some stuff up for me? If you do, I'm sure I can think of a proper reward for you..."

>What wear
- Q ball
- Pumpkin
- Helmet
- Nothing! None of this feels RIGHT!!!

>You plan to RIDE OUT but will you form a posse? (multi vote option)
- Go alone! (+1 story point)
- Bring [Sphinx], she provides tips on PUZZLES (-1 story point)
- Bring [[Aqrabuamelu], she provides bonuses to COMBAT (-1 story point)
- Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
>>
>>5019200
>- Nothing! None of this feels RIGHT!!!

>- Bring [Sphinx], she provides tips on PUZZLES (-1 story point)
>- Bring [[Aqrabuamelu], she provides bonuses to COMBAT (-1 story point)
>- Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)

Let's gooooo!
>>
>>5019200
- Q ball
Trust our gut, cuz we don't have a head to trust.

- Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!
>>
>>5019200
>Q Ball
We ballin
>Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
>>
>>5019215
+1
>>
>>5019200
>- Q ball
>- Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
>>
>>5019200
HEAD OR BUST
CAN'T CHEAT ON WHAT IS UNDOUBTEDLY SET TO BE BEST GIRL
>- Nothing! None of this feels RIGHT!!!
>However you will take the pumpkin to be used as a fireball down the road.
>Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
>>
>>5019200
>- Pumpkin
> Carve a very angry face into the Pumpkin using our acursed blade, Widowslayer, before donning it
>Go alone
>Slap Sorc's ass on the way out.
>>
>>5019200
>Slap Sorc's ass on the way out.
>>
>>5019200
>Pumpkin
>- Bring [Sphinx], she provides tips on PUZZLES (-1 story point)
>- Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)
>>
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As you step out, The [sorceress] gives you a list of things she needs for a potion she would like to brew. It includes a vampire's nail, an enchanted ace of spades, and a demon's skull.

"Think of it as a [side quest] ok? I'll be sure to reward you for all the things you can find. If you find your head early, don't feel like you need to stay out and get everything for me! But I'll be really thankful if you did~<3"

You take the list, but don't promise anything. You need to stay focused on the task at hand.
>>
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-Bring [MYSTERY BOX], she provides ??????? (-1 story point)

Of course you can't go screaming through the woods without your loyal [nightMARE] mount! You head down to the stables and find her already suited up and ready to go.

She gives you a scrutinizing look.

"Lost your head again huh? Nice replacement, you look like a poof."

She doesn't seem to approve of your new head decor.

"I don't look like a poof"

"Yeah you do, real poof like. Its ruining your image, ruining my image. The people are going to call you Q-ball. No insult, just fact."

Well, YOU like it and that's all the matters, probably. The only question is where to go first? The longer someone has your head the WORSE things could get. The one who learns the secrets of your head can learn to CONTROL you!

>[Vampire] Castle
>[Mad Hater]'s House of Cards
>[Warlock]'s cove
>>
>>5019435
>>[Warlock]'s cove
>> RIDE on [nightMARE] cause we aint walkin' like bitch!
>>
>>5019438
+1
>>
>>5019438
+1

Also [sorcess] is cute. CUTE!!!!
>>
>>5019438
+1, have our steed warn us for traps in case there are any
>>
>>5019438
I'd prefer to go to hatter first but otherwise this looks good
>>
>>5019435
Vampire was trying to get into our coffin, but screw it.

>>5019438
Support!
>>
>>5019435
>[Mad Hater]'s House of Cards
I suspect this bitch
>>
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With no time to lose, you jump on the [nightMARE]'s back and you're off!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VNECeIUOt0

The [nightMare] is the fastest horse in the land! With her in your party you can get form [LOCATION] to [LOCATION] in no time at all. She is so fast in fact that there is no [TIME] penalty for doing so.

The two of you race to the [Warlock]'s cove.
>>
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You delve deep into the cove. Its quite, TOO quite. Soon you find a massive obsidian door blocking your path. You can hear someone is talking on the other side. On top of the door read the words "Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate". But since you are not a nerd, you have no idea what they mean.

>what do?
- KICK the door down and start fucking shit up Dark knight style
- Politely knock on the door, you are a marauder not an animal
- Peek in through the window like the pervert we both know you are
>>
>>5019839
>- KICK the door down and start fucking shit up Dark knight style
>>
>>5019839
>- KICK the door down and start fucking shit up Dark knight style
https://youtu.be/RWgyKDfFC_U
>>
>>5019839
>Ask Nightmare what the funny words mean while we peek through the windown
>>
>>5019864
Supporting. Our horse seems like she might be a nerd.
>>
>>5019839
>- KICK the door down and start fucking shit up Dark knight style
GIVE ME BACK MY HEAD
>>
>>5019864
Going with this.
>>
>>5019864
+1

Also we aren't a pervert definitely not we just need to know if there is someone in a state of dist(undr)ess
>>
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You ask the [NightMARE] if she knows what the words means.

"NAY! Don't speak nerd."

The [NightMARE] is 100% horsepower and muscle. No room for brains in that noggin. Perhaps that explains her loyalty. Maybe if you had some kind of Egyptian themed cat with you?
>>
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You peek through the window and spot two imps in a state of undress. Before they could remove each others bra and panties a LOUD NOISE ALERTS THEM TO YOUR PRESENCE.

They spot you peeping!

"Sister! Sister! Look that man is looking at us through the window!"
"Pervert! Pervert! I see him sister!"
"This is bad! This is bad! That's the Horsemen!
"Oh no! Oh no! We are not ready!
"Leave! Leave! Come in through the door!"
"Go now! Go now! We have to prepare!
"Gross! Gross! He is still here!"
"Disgusting! Disgusting! he is undressing me with his eyes!"
"Creep! Creep! He is having lewd thoughts!!!"
"Cheater! Cheater! Come in through the door!"

>what do?
- Come in through the window and instantly defeat the unprepared [Imps] (-4 [Imps] FP)
- Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
- Write in (-1 Story Point)
>>
>>5020008
- Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
Puzzles are fun.
> he is undressing me with his eyes!"
That would require her to have something to undress first.
>>
>>5020008
>- "Hey, before I head in, what's the words over the door mean?"
>- Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
>>
>>5020008
>implying I care about any imps that aren't short and stacked
I've fapped to too much level drain paizuri to care about imps that don't have tits larger than their head.

>Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
Ask them what they're trying to prepare.
>>
>>5020008
>- Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
>Point the imps you don't really have eyes.
>>
>>5020008
>- Wait for them to prepare, then go in through the door (puzzle based combat)(+4 [Imps] FP)
>>
>>5020008
Send the NightMARE to go get the Sphinx. This place seems to be some sort of nerd dungeon.

That should give them time to prepare . Then, we go in and wreck them anyway.
>>
>>5020057
Well, it's a puzzle, so they might not want the other ones to get in to ruin it.
>>
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You go back around and give the [Imps] about five minutes before knocking on the door. You hear voices from the other side.

"Sister! Sister! He is too impatient!"
"Horsemen! Horsemen! You must wait!"

After about another ten minutes of waiting around, they call out to you.

"Pervert! Pervert! We are ready for you!"
"Peeping Tom! Peeping Tom! Ready we now are!"
>>
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You open the door and find the two imps fully clothed. You don't understand why it took fifteen minutes for them to put on a shirt and pants combo, but then again you are not a women. The [Imps] give you the standard dialogue as if you didn't just see them half naked.

"Intruder! Intruder! You have passed into our realm!"
"Foolish mortal! Foolish Mortal! You will now be judged"
"Abandon all hope! Abandon all hope!"
"All ye who pass! All ye who pass!"
"Our test! Our test! You must pass it"
"Or else! Or else! We will destroy you!"

"Sister! Sister! Everyone thinks we look the same!"
"Not so! Not so! We are completely different!"
"Intruder! Intruder! Can you tell us apart?"
"He will fail! He will fail! Find all our differences to pass the test!"

>how is one imp different from the other! List all that apply!
>>
>>5020086
Hairstyle is different (colors too)
Earrings are different
Tie patterns are different
One has skin of vanilla, the other of caramel
The left sister has a chain on her pant
The right one has a stripe on her pant
The left has a white shoe with black sole, the right has white shoe with white sole
Right has star spurs
Left has long sleeves, right has short.
Right has choker
Left is smiling, right is not

In the end however, both are extremely cute.
>>
>>5020086
One has a STEM degree, whereas one dropped out of social sciences and toured Europe.
>>
>>5020086
Right has a pocket shirt.
>>
>>5020142
Yeah, i think that's the one i missed.
>>
>>5020122
The underwear is different too.
>>
>>5020154
Ooo, good one. Adding this to
>>5020129
>>
>>5020154
Oh yeah also the wings they have different colors as well and different facial expressions as well, if that counts for anything.
>>
>>5020154
Well, they weren't prepared, so i'm guessing the underwear doesn't count? If it does, however, here's the list of differences.

Left has a full sock, Right has front of feet showing
Sock pattern and colors are different
Right has (what seems like) a frill
Left has lower panties with larger strings, right has normal panties
The colors are different for the underwear.
Left has bra with frills that has no suspensers
Right has bra with different patterns that has a suspenser
Right has some thing with a string whose name i don't know
Bra colors are different.
Their earrings also changed.

In the end, they are [still] cute
>>
>>5020086
Brown one is cuter
>>
>>5020171
They're equally cute, one cannot be without the other. If we were to chose them, we would need to get [both]
>>
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>>5020122
>>5020142
>>5020159
With your discerning eye you scrutinize them intensely. You almost miss the wings and the shirt pocket but in the end you notice that too.

"Wrong! Wrong! You are incorrect!"
"Missed something! Missed something! There is one thing you missed!"
"Never! Never! Will you guess what it is!"
"Everyone fails! Everyone fails! The last one is unguessable!"

>>5020154
You didn't want to say it, but if they are going to force your hand.

"Your underwear is different too"
>>
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"Cheater! Cheater! You shouldn't have known that!
"Pervert! Pervert! Have you no shame!"
"Do over! Do over! We want a do over!"
"Hentai! Hentai! I'm so embarrassed..."

The [Imps] don't seem too happy that you didn't fall for their trap and called them out on their underwear.

"Well girls, you may be different in your own ways but in one thing you are the same. You are both extremely cute."

"Aiii! Aiiii! He's flirting with us!!!"
"Aah! Aah! Just move to the next area already!!!"

>What do
- Move on to the next area (+1 Story point)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Imps] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Write in (-1 Story Point)
>>
>>5020261
>- Move on to the next area (+1 Story point)
>>
>>5020261
>Slap their asses and move on
>>
>>5020261
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Imps] FP)(FREE ACTIO
I do hope we'll see them again
>>
>>5020261
>- Move on to the next area (+1 Story point)

>>5020274
I don't. The repetition thing is extremely annoying.
>>
>>5020261
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Imps] FP)(FREE ACTION)
Your lingerie, however, were SEXY AS FU-(kicked in face by [nightMARE])
>>
>>5020261
>- Move on to the next area (+1 Story point)
>>
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You go further and further into the dungeon and fight a nameless mook or two on the way. The whole place seems pretty unprepared for a sacking. Its almost like no one knew you would be coming. Odd, since they stole your head. You would think the place would be a little more secure.

Your mussing are interrupted when you enter a dimly lit room. There is someone sitting at a computer playing games and tabbing out into a million different browser tabs. They have not noticed your presence at all.

>what do?
- Keep going, leave this nerd to their vidya and speedrun yourself closer to the end of this quest
- Look over their shoulder of this gamer
- Announce your presence loudly
>>
>>5020494
>- Look over their shoulder of this gamer
>>
>>5020494
kick over chair, dark Knight style
>>
>>5020494
>Call out the nerd on his bad taste in vidya.
>>
>>5020494
>Bust out gamer controller
>Challenge the nerd
>>
>>5020502
>>5020532
+1, shoulder surf MENACINGLY then growl a quip to really scare them
>>
>>5020494
>Call out the nerd on his bad taste in vidya.
Supporting >>5020532
>>
I shall start the best girl debate now. Nightmare is clearly best girl.
>>
>>5021044
Eh...she's a bit...bland, isn't it? She doesn't have much of an personality that i've seen, she's just your mare.
>>
>>5020494
>- Look over their shoulder of this gamer
>>
>>5021061
Don't you feel it? Pure horse power! The aura Equine muscle and speed just protruding from her like a scent. Plus she probably actually smells. When the day is done, who shall be the rider?
>>
>>5021044
Sorceress is best (thus far)
>>
>>5021186
That's still just looks, anon. Not personality.
>>5021195
The problem with sorceress is that she sure seems to like using you to run her errands, which makes me question her overall motivations.
>>
>>5021201
Well duh, it's a coomer quest. The horse girl is the deviant's choice so she has my vote.
>>
Aaa! I'm scared!
>>
>>5020494
>>Call out the nerd on his bad taste in vidya.
>>
>>5021044
Aqrabuamelu all the way.

Have you seen the size of those pincers? And those abs, unf.
>>
>>5021305
You were warned.
>>
>>5021410
Agreed. She's even submitted to us already. I think we definitely should pay her a visit again.
>>
>>5021410
An answer I can accept. Don't really care for that behind though. Plus I bet she lacks the stamina of NightMare.
>>
>>5021410
She's nice and all, but i don't think she has any parts.
>>
>>5021061
And one more thing before I go to bed Mr "bland". Our noble mount was actually the ONLY girl in this quest so far to show some sass and berate us for running around like an asshole.
>>
>>5021511
Do *we* have any parts?
>>
>>5021578
We have normal legs, so probably?
>>
>>5021578
No anon, we're missing our head.
>>
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You stand behind the gamer's chair and find a [Succubus] wearing just her bra and panties. She seems to be playing some kind of auto battler / VN hybrid. She is constantly tabbing into several spoiler heavy guides and relentlessly quick saving so she can save scum every bad dice roll. On the desktop you see many saved images of anime butts. While she is in the web browser, you read some of the headers of the tabs she has open: "Youtube: darksouls FULL MOVIE", "Google: How to come across as cool and aloof", "/qst/: PKM gold".

"Wow"

You didn't mean to say that out loud, but you couldn't help but externalizing your displeasure. The [Succubus], not knowing how long you have been standing there, immediately alt tabs into a safe for work youtube video about cat memes. The Video gets stuck on auto buffer and doesn't load.
>>
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In a whirlwind of activity the [Succubus] get dressed and tries to come off as cool and aloof.

"Tsk, we got another do gooder here to stop the mistress? Whatever, I guess ill deal with you. How would you like to DIE?"

>what do
- Request Puzzle based combat
- Request Dice Based combat

Extra:
- Tell the [Succubus] that she forgot her pants. (+1 [Succubus] FP)(WARNING: The [succubus] will wear pants for the remainder of the quest)
-Don't say anything
>>
>>5021598
>Request Dice Based combat
>>
>>5021598
>- Request Puzzle based combat
>- Tell the [Succubus] that she forgot her pants. (+1 [Succubus] FP)(WARNING: The [succubus] will wear pants for the remainder of the quest)
The trick is we hand her her low cut boy shorts. that way she's technically covered up, but she'll likely still be wearing those high cut panties.
>>
>>5021598
- Request Puzzle based combat
>>
>>5021598
>>- Request Puzzle based combat
>>
>>5021598
>- Request Puzzle based combat
>-Don't say anything
>>
>>5021598
>- Request Puzzle based combat
- Tell the [Succubus] that she forgot her pants. (+1 [Succubus] FP)(WARNING: The [succubus] will wear pants for the remainder of the quest)
>>
>>5021598
cut her panty-string
that should get rid of her
>>
>>5021706
>nudity
>getting rid of a succubus
are you dumb
>>
>>5021598
>Request Dice Based combat
>Don't say anything
>>
>>5021598
Oh, I forgot to
>Don't say anything
>>
>>5021638
I forgot
>-Don't say anything
>>
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A puzzle? Seriously? I hate puzzles! Especially when you cant find the solution online."

She gets out of COMBAT MODE and take a more relaxed approach with you.

"Oh very well! According the the "fairness in hell" act of 193, I have no choice but to offer you a puzzle based alternative to combat."
>>
File: 1.png (1.21 MB, 2650x1516)
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She hands you an old parchment that's been weathered by time and folded over about hundred times.

"You are supposed to find "what is best in life" in that maze. Don't ask me for hints, as I have never figured it out myself!"

>What do
- Give answer
- Cant figure this out, FIGHT [succubus]
>>
>>5021738
To crush your enemies, see them driven before, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
>>
>>5021738
looks like a MAD fold-in
>>
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hmm interesting
ask the Succ to turn around real quick
>>
>>5021738
I think >>5021768 has the right idea.
>>
>>5021738
>- Give answer
Tights
>>
>>5021768
Yeah this works +1
>>
>>5021768
+1>>5021778
>>
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>>5021768
You ask the [Succubuss] to turn around as it pertains to the puzzle.

"Alright, but no sneaking away or looking at my computer!"

Using the [Succubus]' butt as a guide, you are able to solve the 4d rublix cube that is this puzzle. You twist, turn, and fold the paper until it resembles what the puzzle maker must have decided was best in life. Agree or disagree, you can at least respect the dedication.
>>
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You show the [Succubus] the completed puzzle.

"WOAH, are you a Scientist or something??? How did you DO that? Yeah go on ahead consider me SLAIN"

You pass her test and are now able to move on, you also feel more confident in your mental abilities.

>what do
- Move on to the next area
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Succubus] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
- Write in (-1 Story Point)
>>
>>5021879
>- Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
- Move on to the next area
>>
>>5021879
>- Gently stroke the [Succubus]'s horns.
>- Move on to the next area
>>
>>5021879
>- Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5021879
>Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5021879
>- Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5021879
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Succubus] FP)(FREE ACTION)
Well clearly I'm not about to leave without the best thing in life
> Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
>Move on to the next area (with succubus)
>>
>>5021879
>WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Succubus] FP)(FREE ACTION)

quickly scan through all of the Succubus' browser tabs. Then leave in disgust.
>>
>>5021879
>- Grab the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
AND
>>5022049
>>
>>5021879
>Move on to the next area
>Stroke the [Succubus]'s horns (-3 [Succubus] FP)
How many story points do we have?
>>
>>5021879

Supporting this banter:

>>5022009
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Succubus] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>Well clearly I'm not about to leave without the best thing in life

She can help us more efficiently find the Warlock.
>>
>>5022288
Yeah OP include a story points counter in your updates, can't expect our coombrains to keep track
>>
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You are unwilling to leave empty handed, and tell the [Succubus] so.

"Well clearly I'm not about to leave without the best thing in life"

The [Succubus] doesn't get it.

"Eh? You want the puzzle? I actually still need it in case someone else shows up later."

Being the marauder that you are, you take hold of the [Succubus]'s horns WITHOUT consent. She is mind broken instantly. Holding onto her horns is like taking a cat by the scruff of her neck. You can lead her around however you like. She is sure to become extremely upset the moment you release her.

>what do?
- Release the succubus and move onto the next area (+1 story point)
- SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5022576
>- STROKE EM
>- SQUEEZE EM
>- CARESS EM
>- FONDLE EM
>>
- SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5022576
>- SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5022576
SQUEEZE. Then have her take us to her leader.
>>
>>5022576
>Release the succubus and move onto the next area (+1 story point)
moar story points
>>
>>5022576
>SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>RUB THE TIP WITH OUR PALM
>>
>>5022576
>- SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>>
>>5022576
>- SQUEEZE (-6 [Succubus] FP)
>>
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Well, if she is going to get mad when you release her, you best make the best out of the time you have together. So instead of letting go you double down and KEEP squeezing. Every time you apply force to the [Succubus]'s horns, she releases a small "ah~". As you press, rub, caress, and fondle them, her "ah~"s become louder and more dragged out. Until you press with FULL FORCE which causes her to convulse momentarily, as she kicks hard with her legs. Then the [Succubuss] goes limp and you get no more reactions out of her; if you hold onto her horns or not. Just as well, you can't spend all day her squeezing her horns. You get [nightMARE] to take a photo of you for the scrap book before throwing her back where you found her. With this stage complete your party moves on to the next room.
>>
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As you dispatch faceless mook after faceless mook, one of them drops some out of place loot. A pair of pants belonging to a priest. You wonder if this foreshadowing gear would have been better if it the Qm remembered to dropped this earlier in the dungeon, but no one is perfect.
>>
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>>5022809
You enter the third and final room before the boss battle, and find a pants-less goth [Priest] with his legs shackled. You looks very distraught, but upon seeing you he perks up.

"Hey! You are not a demon themed monster! Could it be that you don't work for the [Warlock]??? Please free me! I was on my way to the [Vampire] Castle to look for some disappeared maidens when I got captured! Please release me before the [OGRE] gets back, I don't want to end up like those guys!!! I promise to repay you in the future should you go to the [Vampire] castle!"
>>
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You look over to the pile of skeletons he is referring too, all their pelvic bones have been crushed to dust.

>What do?
- With a single swing of your sword on the chains you free the [Priest]
- Wait for the [OGRE] to get back and discus things (-1 story point)
- You don't have time for this, move onto the boss battle and leave the [Priest] to his fate
- Return the Priest his pants (+2 [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
>>5022810
- Return the Priest his pants (+2 [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- With a single swing of your sword on the chains you free the [Priest]
I believe aerosmith has a song that could describe this guy
>>
>>5022813
>- With a single swing of your sword on the chains you free the [Priest]
>- Return the Priest his pants (+2 [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>>
>>5022810
>- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)

Well we know he'd do a favour for his freedom, but what would he do for his PANTS?

Tease him a little, then...
>- With a single swing of your sword on the chains you free the [Priest]
>- Return the Priest his pants (+2 [Priest] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>>
>>5022846
+1
>>
>>5022813
>- With a single swing of your sword on the chains you free the [Priest]
>- Wait for the [OGRE] to get back and discus things (-1 story point)
>Give his rump a good SLAP
>>
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With your decrepit executioner blade "The Sleeper" you cleave the chains holding the [Priest]. Much like a hot knife through butter your sword makes short work of his restraints.

"Thank you for your help my dude! Feeling someone up without consent is wrong, but that didn't stop the [OGRE] from taking advantage of my pals. Its not easy being a girl in this setting I guess, but that doesn't excuse her actions!"

This guy is in for a surprise, he has just traded one perverted overlord for another. For now, he is very happy to be rescued. He doesn't even mention the fact that you have a Q-ball for a head.

"I knew you would come through for me. We guys got to stick together, you are the first other dude I have seen in days! Hey, you haven't seen a pair of pants laying around have you?"

As a matter of fact you have, you pull the [priest]'s long pants from your inventory and offer them to him. Yet as he is about to take them from your hands, you pull back and ask him what he would do to have them returned.

"Aah! Don't do me like this! Alright, alright, if the bro code inst enough for you, perhaps I can offer you the services of my band?"

Explain.

"Me and my friends do cover songs of bands like GHOST, my chemical romance, green day, etc. If you ever throw a party, I'll come out and play for you. No charge!"

He must have mistaken you for a teenage girl, but if that's the best he can do then you agree and return his pants which he puts back on with glee.
>>
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... Wait a minute that doesn't look right.

"Thanks again! It was getting really chilly."

Whatever, time to move on to the boss room.
>>
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No more mooks, and no more games (probably). You walk right into the boss room and into the [Warlock]. She's a BIG girl, damn.

"Vhy you come eh?" her accent is comically thicc.

"I HAVE COME FOR MY HEAD, RETURN WHAT YOU HAVE TAKEN OR I WILL RUN YOU DOWN"

"Vat? You vant head? How about date first? Bah, I just destroy you! Sort pieces out later yes?"

Combat music starts to play: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9917Y9XTb0

>what do?
- COMBAT based PUZZLE
- PUZZEL based COMBAT
>>
>>5023249
>- "Holy shit, those thighs... How many squats you do every day to get them that thick and firm?"
>SQUATS based COMBAT
>>
>>5023260
+1
>>
>>5023260
Supporting
Also add
>>”You’re getting ahead of yourself!”
>>
>>5023249
>- COMBAT based PUZZLE
>>
>>5023260
+1. With Nightmare and this faggy priest we can out-squat her.
>>
>>5023260
+1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JdllqreiJc
>>
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She wants to do battle but all you can think about are those THIGHS. You rub your Q-ball head all over them. A tongue, a tongue, your kingdom for a tongue!!!

For (-1) story point you put combat on the back burner so you can discus things of much higher importance.

"Holy shit, those thighs... How many squats you do every day to get them that thick and firm?"

"Vell, vhen I get up in the morning I give self very strict routine. Virst I have a piece of toast, then-"

She goes on and on but you cant hear her.

>three, maybe four, anons roll a 1d20 for squats based combat.
>>
Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>5023666
We need some more appropriate battle music for a squat battle... anybody got some Hardbass that would fit?
>>
Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>5023666
>>
Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>5023666
>>
Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>5023666
>>
Rolled 29 (1d30)

>>5023677
>>
Rolled 4 (1d30)

>>5023679
>>
Rolled 3 (1d30)

>>5023688
>>
Rolled 21 (1d30)

>>5023690
>>
>>5023690
huh this was relatively close from the looks of it
>>
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You demand a demonstration, in fact, you demand trial by squats instead of any nerd puzzle. She looks hesitant, but after looking at your noodle legs she give in.

"Vell, its not how ve do around here. But vin is vin, we do test of... How you say?"

she thinks for a moment then smiles

"endurance."

Right out of the gate she blows you away with her speed, squat after squat she doubles triples quintuples your squat count. Yet this is a test of ENDURANCE, she is going to burn out showing off like that!

Right?
>>
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She starts to slow down and you feel for a moment like you have a chance. But she is only toying with you, she is heightening your inevitable humiliation by letting you catch up.

Eventually you run out of energy and collapse... but the [Warlock] is STILL going. She goes up, and she comes down. Up and down, up and down.

If you thought this BOSS battle was going to be easy, you are in for disappointment.

>what do?
- DO OVER! You demand a test of SPEED instead. First to a 100 wins it all! (-1 story point)
- COMBAT based PUZZLE
- PUZZLE based COMBAT
>>
>>5023840
Oh no ! What a terrible, crushing defeat this is! The horror.

- COMBAT based PUZZLE
>>
>>5023840
>- COMBAT based PUZZLE
>>
>>5023840
>- PUZZLE based COMBAT
>>
>>5023840
- PUZZLE based COMBAT
>>
>>5023840
>- COMBAT based PUZZLE

We shall flex our brain muscles wherever they may be
>>
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>two anons roll a 1d20 for COMBAT based PUZZLE
>>
Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>5023924
>>
Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>5023924
>>
Rolled 24 (1d37)

>>5023949
>>
Rolled 8 (1d26)

>>5023959
>>
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The [Warlock] keeps pummelling you into oblivion! She has the strength and the speed of a demon. But wait a minute, what the hell are these rolls? She is CHEATING (probably). Using your heightened warrior senses you ANALYZE your opponent very closely. Perhaps there is a puzzle that you have to solve?

Yes, its not only that she is STRONG, but her DEFENCES are almost perfect. From your deep instinctual analysis you can sense there is some video game logic at play here. A piece of gear she is wearing is giving her unnaturally high defence! The only way to get a fair shot at beating her is to figure out what piece it is and focus your attack on it!

>What do?
- BRUTE FORCE IT, Go [Dark Knight] all over her!
- What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence?
- ask your party for some hints. (-1 story point)
>>
>>5024039
I don't know if it's an reference, but i'm fairly certain it's either the hood or the boots
>>
>>5024039
>A true dark knight would assert dominance by expanding in size
>>
>>5024039
>- What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence?
Her hood, take of her head and it will be an easy win.
>>
>>5024039
>What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence
Let's strip her, just in case it's some trinket she's keeping underneath her clothes.
>>
>>5024039
>The skull pauldron that is cracked
>>
>>5024126
Please support me as it is the one thing not symmetrical and shows damage
>>
>>5024126
+1 to this

>am i doing this right
>>
>>5024126
Changing to this.
>>
>>5024126
Support. Target the pauldron!
>>
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>>5024126
>Her hood, take of her head and it will be an easy win.
>The skull pauldron that is cracked

You try to focus your attacks on a few key areas but its not having much effect. Her defence is still unnaturally high. As her fists pound into your face you are not sure how much more of this you can take...

You have a high HP pool and high armour but, extremely enjoyable as it has been, you have been taking a good amount of chip damage since the start of this morning. So you are in the DANGER ZONE.

>What do?
- BRUTE FORCE IT, Go [Dark Knight] all over her!
- What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence?
- ask your party for some hints. (-1 story point)
>>
>>5024233
>expand like a true black knight
>>
>>5024233
>- What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence?
Okay, so knowing the quest so far, it has to be something related to sexiness... Is it hidden by her zipper?
>>
>>5024244
We can try. Open her zipper then.
>>
>>5024233
Her belt! It's holding the whole outfit together!
>>
>>5024233
>- BRUTE FORCE IT, Go [Dark Knight] all over her!
>>
>>5024271
+1
Get that belt
>>
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If only there was some kind of subtle hint slamming against your head over and over. Perhaps if there was a running theme to this dungeon that ties all three encounters together. Maybe you could look at it and somehow bring it all together for this final combat-puzzle. That's just an opinion though. I'm only a omnipotent evil mirror trying to run a financially successful quest, what do I know?
>>
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>>5024262
>>5024244

Dare you pull it? This is your last chance.

>What do?
- What piece of gear is giving her unnaturally high defence?
- I will win or lose by the brutality of my blade not some dirty trick! BRUTE FORCE IT!
>>
>>5024368
So you want us to slap them thighs
>>
>>5024372
>Dare you pull it? This is your last chance.
DO IT.
>>
>>5024372
>Screw it pull the zipper
>>
>>5024372
PULL IT. DO IT FAGGOT
>>
>>5024372
Dont do it and just die, reset, and then try again for a better time
>>
>>5024372
>- I will win or lose by the brutality of my blade not some dirty trick! BRUTE FORCE IT!
>>
>>5024375
yeah do it. I was sure it was that tongue thing.
>>
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You pull the zipper. As you do, her dress /pants thing comes undone. Damn there it is, the crown jewel of the collection. It radiates demonic power! These stripped panties are the source of her ultimate defence. The only thing left to do is remove them and victory will be yours!
>>
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Ah right, the ass kicking you are receiving. I almost forgot.

Lets have three 1d20's from the audience to settle the whole thing once and for all. Win or lose this ends before I fall asleep tonight.

>three anons roll be 1d20s
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>5024472
VICTORY OR DEATH
>>
Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>5024472
Seize the moment.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>5024479
>>
Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>5024480
>>
>>5024472
How the fuck does one even roll
>>
>>5024490

dice+1d20

in the options field
>>
>>5024490
>Fucking (OP) name I had for another thread on a different board hours ago is still on
>Realize Im way to fucking tired to check all the posts ie made since then
>>
Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>5024472
Welp
>>5024492
Thanks m8
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>5024498
>>
>>5024479
>>5024480
>>5024498
>>5024485
>>5024488
>>5024500
We did it folks, the warlock is defeated and pantyless.
>>
>>5024503
I say to wear them on our head
First so that we can obtain its defensive powers
Second so we look cash as fuck
>>
>>5024524
Definitely a step up for the old 8-ball
>>
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You knock the [Warlock] down and start struggling with her. She is a big girl and her legs are like tree trunks! Yet you manage to pin her regardless, you are packing great strength in those noodle arms. Those panties are coming OFF! its actually quite easy to wrestle her, the resistance is surprisingly minimal. In fact, you could call it token at best.The whole thing is a bit of a blur, all these greys, blacks, and whites make it hard to actually see whats going on visually. So liek a blind man you let your hands do the work and slide them up along her legs, until you reach the laces of her panties. Then, ever so slowly, you retrieve them from her person. As you do, her thighs slam down on your Q ball head and SQUEEZE you down to your remaining single digit HP. Then she lets go and starts to caress your smooth head with the sides of her legs. You finally remove her undergarment from between her legs.

In this position, With your head between the [Warlocks] legs, you know exactly what you want to do at this very moment. The [Judas priest] even starts to cheer you on. Unfortunately, you have no head, and no mouth. Yet, by the cruel grace of Satan you can still scream your frustration into the heavens.
>>
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"So does this mean I won?"

Yeah you won, but is this really winning? The [Warlock] answers your partially rhetorical question.

"Yes, you vin. You are best."

You wonder if you should return her panties

"No, you keep."

You check the stats, they are indeed hyper inflated but its only wearable by Warlocks... Heart breaking.
>>
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Well, you did it, you cleared the [Warlock]'s cove and made some new friends along the way. The [Warlock] even names you the master of the domain by right of "trail by puzzle-combat". Look, there is even the demon skull the [Sorceress] asked you to collect. Everything is wrapped up ion a nice little casket! Yet you feel like you have forgotten something...

Ah! Your head!

"Ah, I see. Is misunderstand yes? I not take head, [Vampire] want to see coffin yes. But I left room vith [Sorceress]. She must have forgotten. She is, how you say? forgetful?"

DAMN, your head is in another caste after all.

>What do
- Go back to HEAD-quarters and reassess / change party / deliver skull / count (story points) / visit sorceress / etc
- Go straight to the [Vampire] Castle
- Go straight to the [Mad Hater]'s House of Cards
>>
>>5024626
Time to dual-class then. We're gonna munchkin this shit up!
>>
>>5024627
> - Go straight to the [Vampire] Castle
>>
>>5024627
I vote we "store" the panties on our forehead despite it not having any statistical improvement
>>
>>5024632
+1
>>
>>5024627
>- Go back to HEAD-quarters and reassess / change party / deliver skull / count (story points) / visit sorceress / etc
>>
>>5024635
+1 (if dual-classing isn't an option)
>>
>>5024627
- Go back to HEAD-quarters and reassess / change party / deliver skull / count (story points) / visit sorceress / etc
No reason to hold onto the skull.
>>
>>5024627

>- Go back to HEAD-quarters and reassess / change party / deliver skull / count (story points) / visit sorceress / etc

Switch the demon skull in as our head, and add the panties.
>>
>>5024774
changing to this
>>
>>5024627
- Go back to HEAD-quarters and reassess / change party / deliver skull / count (story points) / visit sorceress / etc
Gotta heal up.
>>
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You decide to head back home for various reasons, but mostly to just heal up. Besides, you need to put all these spoils you have collected somewhere.
>>
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Yet while riding you encounter the strangest thing, you almost don't recognize what it is.

Its a simple villager lost in the haunted woods. He is not a sexy lady or anything and doesn't even have more then two pieces of dialogue to string together. Pathetic! Still...

>what do?
- Chase him all over the woods and try to claim his head
- You don't have time for this, let him be
>>
>>5025009
Ask if he can do taxes, because I dont think anyone in the party knows what a number is
>tfw no spynx
>>
>>5025009
>Greet him.
>Tell him he has a very nice head and that he should cherish it.
>Continue on.
>>
>>5025014
+1
>>
>>5025009


>>5025014
Support...

>>5025010
But if he does know taxes, kidnap him.
>>
>>5025014
This is the plan b if he does not know taxes, +1
>>
>>5025010
We can do taxes as we have committed ourself to commiting every crime at least once in our long life and we committed tax fraud perfectly fine for your information
>>
>>5025080
Oh im not implying we do our taxes legitimately,
Im saying we get help so we can do tax fraud >better<

Tax breaks go a long way in running a HEAD-quarters

do you think that we have someone who can make sure that we pay as little gold as possible? and that we're paid as MUCH gold as possible?
>>
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You inquire to the lost peasants ability to do taxes

"Crop coming in good this year"
"Born here, reckon ill die here"
"Crop coming in good this year"
"Crop coming in good this year"

You expected too much from this hapless NPC peasant. You compliment him on his head and continue on your way. Not very Dark Horsemen of you, but I suppose there is no time to ride down every person you see.
>>
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You arrive back at your lair. Waiting for you at the entrance is the [Sorceress], she greets you warmly. You note that the [Sphinx] and the [Aqrabuamelu] have come up from the crypt as well. This flurry of action must have roused their curiosity. As your first action, you deliver the demon skull to the [Sorceress].
>>
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"Eh? Whats this for? A gift for me?"

You remind her of the shopping list that she gave you.

"Ah! Thats right, thank you so much. I was just thinking about how there isn't any left in my cupboard"

She gives you a smooch on the head.

You take this moment to test the [Warlock]s alibi. After some thinking she ends up collaborating the story, it seems that she just plum forgot. If she just told you right away then you wouldn't have had to go to the cove in the first place and waste your time. What a ditz!
>>
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"I see you brought some friends with you! Are we going to have a party? Should I make some dip?"

"No, these people are simply my prisoners"

You had decided to bring everyone here. The less people that are out in the haunted woods the easier it will be to keep track of everyone and eliminate those that don't have your head until only the conspirators remain.
>>
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Alright champ, I did a hard count of the story points and it looked like you have amassed [THREE 3 ]. Remember that those are meant to be used to spice things up and not to be hoarded. They have no monetary value and I wont be reimbursing you after the quest is done. Also, as a reminder, this next vote is a MULTI vote. Be sure to vote on all THREE sections.

>Now that you are at home base, visit with... (+4 FP with whoever you visit, pick 3)
[Sorceress]
[Sphinx]
[Aqrabuamelu]
[Evil Mirror]
[Nightmare]
[Imps]
[Succubus]
[Judas Priest]
[Warlock]

>Party formation (+1 story point for removing party members -1 for adding)
In party:
[Nightmare]: Fast travel between zones

Out of party:
[Sphinx]: Tips during puzzles
[Aqrabuamelu]: +2 to all COMBAT rolls
[Imps]: +2 to all EVENT rolls
[Succubus]: Worthless, adds nothing
[Judas Priest]: +2 to all rolls in [Vampire] Castle zone

Where to next?
- [Vampire] Castle
- [Mad Hater]'s House of Cards
>>
Now that, is a question. Which girl, out of these, would be best girl? Sorceress is nice and all, but she is very clearly trying to manipulate odysseus into doing her chores. I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one with the head all along.
>>
>>5025139
Soj, can [Judas Priest] be counted on to supply us with guitar/metal/symphonic covers of Castlevania songs should we bring him to the [Vampire] castle?
>>
>>5025139
VISIT
>[Sorceress]

ADD
>[Imps]: +2 to all EVENT rolls

NEXT
>- [Mad Hater]'s House of Cards
>>
>>5025139
>Visit dem Imps. 2 for the price of 1

>Add
Imps, Judas Priesst

>Go
Vampire Castle
>>
>>5025139
>Visit Evil Mirror (even you should love an evil mirror)
>Add Imps and Judas Priest
>Vampire Castle.
>>
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>>5025148
Sure, but he doesn't have his full band so he can only do solos
>>
>>5025139
Visit
[Sorceress]
[Imps]
[Judas Priest]

Party
[Sphinx]: Tips during puzzles
[Aqrabuamelu]: +2 to all COMBAT rolls
[Imps]: +2 to all EVENT rolls
[Succubus]: Worthless, adds nothing
[Judas Priest]: +2 to all rolls in [Vampire] Castle zone

- [Vampire] Castle
>>
>>5025167
I think you can only visit one person.

I'm not sure which one to choose. Not the sorceress, i think, she's suspicious.

Sphinx is cute. So are the Imps. I'd say we should visit one of the two. (three?)
>>
>>5025139
>Visit Aqrabuamelu, Evil Mirror, Warlock

>Add SUCC, Sphinx, Imps
>GO to Had Matters
>>
>>5025168
(+4 FP with whoever you visit, pick 3)
>>
>>5025170
Oh, i see, then
>Visit
Sphinx
Imps
Evil Mirror
>ADD
Imps
>>
>>5025139
>Part one
[Sorc]: You always want to level up your home base of course! And she has helped the most out of any member. We need to trust her 100%

Optional: Fight that bitch ass [Evil Mirror]: The mirror act so tough when they see out stunning face! I say we show him who the real boss of this gym is. And no the Dark Knight club is NOT two blocks down

>Part 2:
<-1> Add [Imps]: Event rolls determine LOOT and other bonuses, i mean passing speech checks gives amazing PLOT results, i mean....

<-1> Add [Judas Priest]: Its her time to shine!!!

>Part 3:
[Vampire] Castle
We have no neck, we have a priest

It cant POSSIBLY fail, no way
>>
>>5025170
>>5025174
Part one:
Visit [Imps]: two for the price of one!!!

And definitely visit [Bitch Mirror]
>>
>>5025170
>>5025152
Edit, then. Visit Sphinx and Imps as well.
>>
>>5025139
>Visit:
Sorceress
Succubus
Judas Priest

>Party:
Add Sphinx and Judas Priest

>Where to:
Vampire Castle
>>
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>Visit Evil mirror

Uhhh... Ok? What is up my dude? What can I do for you today?

>what do?
- WRITE IN ask meta questions (Free action)
- "Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
- "i'm ready to step into the octagon, LETS FIGHT! "
- Ask for tips, tricks, and random quest trivia
>>
>>5025216
"Wait a second, wouldn't you have seen whoever came in here and left with my head?"
>>
>>5025217
Good question
>>
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>>5025217
>>5025230
I suppose I should have, but I wasn't really paying any attention. So many other /qst/s to read and all that. It was probably the [vampire] or [mad hater], and i'm not just saying that to drive the story forward. Beyond that my omniscient sight is being clouded with magic/ mad energy / blood magic / etc or something so I can't find the head for you either. Its best for you not to think to much about it.

>what do?
- WRITE IN ask meta questions (Free action)
- "Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
- "i'm ready to step into the octagon, LETS FIGHT! "
- Ask for tips, tricks, and random quest trivia
>>
>>5025236
>- WRITE IN ask meta questions (Free action)
Best partners for Vampire Castle, we know trap priest is a given but who else could help?
>>
>>5025244
Good question, eh.
>>
>>5025236
Fair nuff
>"Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
>>
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>>5025244
NO spoilers

>>5025252
Sure, if you are into that kind of thing.

Alright, alright one more then we need to move this along. The [Imps] have been ringing the service bell for hours and I need you to go check it out.

>what do?
- WRITE IN ask meta questions (Free action)
- "Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
- "i'm ready to step into the octagon, LETS FIGHT! "
- Ask for tips, tricks, and random quest trivia
>>
>>5025274
I dont think there's any questions left. Let's go see the Imps.
>>
>>5025274
>"Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
Ask it twice
>>
>>5025274
- "Do you also have a sexy female version or what"
- "i'm ready to step into the octagon, LETS FIGHT! "
- Ask for tips, tricks, and random quest trivia

Let's get to the meat of this meeting.
>>
>>5025293
Before we go ask if there's ways to increase our party limit.
>>
>>5025274
"I asked for a /sexy/ female version though."
>>
>>5025274
>- Ask for tips, tricks, and random quest trivia

Ask for a tip about the next gym leader... Err, dungeon boss.
>>
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>>5025294
>>5025298
>>5025300
Well EXCUUUUSE me for trying to class up the place
>>
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>>5025298
More story points more party

>>5025295
>>5025308
Hmmm, trivia... Well, this is what the [Succubus] would have looked like if you told her she wasn't wearing pants. Other then that, I think my personal favourite is [Warlock]. Its too bad you guys didn't push the squats competition further it was quite enjoyable.

>boss fight tips
The [Vampire] enjoys finer things in life such as jewellery.
>>
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Oops, I need to step out for a bit. I'll finish up in like an hour.
>>
>>5025323
>jewellery

KNEW that cursed necklace would come in handy.
>>
>>5025321
>>5025323
Im busy in a call and you guys DONT fight the mirror?

For shame
Oh well, too late now
>>
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You decide to check out how the [Imps] are settling in before going to catch some shut eye...
"Sister! Sister! We are in trouble!"
"Vermin! Vermin! they're everywhere!"

They both have a hand on the service bell and are ringing it frantically. You don't actually have any servants, but thats not stopping them. They are both hovering all the way up on the ceiling with their pants tucked into their socks.

"What seems to be the problem here?"

"Pervert! Pervert! Oh no more vermin have come!"
"Sister! Sister! Get him to help us!"
"Bad! Bad! I don't want to be in his debt"
"Landlord! Landlord! Its his responsibility!"

"Quit with the double talk and tell me whats wrong already!"

They both look at each other for a moment, then at the same time shout back at you:

"Help! Help! We are being raided!!!"

You look down on the ground. Among the two dozen or so pieces of luggage you find a plethora of Gribblets plundering the [Imps] underwear. Gribblets are a common vermin who seem to spontaneously appear in lairs belonging to vileness's. You always had a few running around but Now that all these females have moved in it seems that have started to come out of the woodwork. Bah, you told them to pack light but it seems as if the [Imps] have brought over everything. Its as if they plan to live here permanently or something.

"Well, what do you want me to do about it?"

"Gross! Gross! We can't live like this!"
"Exterminate! Exterminate! Get rid of them quickly!"
"Demand! Demand! Its your duty as a man to remove them!"
"Responsibility! Responsibility! Please take care of us..."

>what do?
- "The Gribblets were here first... You are just going to have to deal with it" [-999 [imp] FP]
- Exterminate the Gribblets (+0 [Imp] FP)(PUZZLE)
>>
>>5025374
>Exterminate the Gribblets (+0 [Imp] FP)(PUZZLE)

that bra looks way too big for either imp
did they buy for the future or what
>>
>>5025374
>- Exterminate the Gribblets (+0 [Imp] FP)(PUZZLE)
>>
>>5025374
>Exterminate the Gribblets (+0 [Imp] FP)(PUZZLE)
>>
>>5025374
Relocate gribblets to the [Succubus] room
after reacquiring the [Imps] possessions
>>
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It turns out having a harem of women in your lair only sounds good on paper. Eradicating vermin is a thankless job, and you aren't expecting any reward. Yet if you were to walk away, you would be in some deep trouble. Its a no win situation unless you enjoy crushing Gribblets.

On the other hand, the [Imps] sure are CUTE. Furthermore, you have already decided that the person who gets the rub their underwear all over their face is going to be you. There is no way you are going to let some rodent be the reason you got BAD END route locked.

-

You start slicing up the Gribblets, but for every one you kill another two seem to take their place! This room is a TREASURE trove of feminine undergarments and products so they are swarming the place faster then you can blender them! You stop and think back on what the [Sorceress] told you a few years back when she was dealing with her own infestation.

Among Gribblets there is always an ALPHA, if you find and kill him the rest will SCATTER! How do you find the Alpha you ask? Well the Alpha's markings are UNIQUE. You simply have to find the one that is different form all the others.

Yep, its not hard or challenging. Yet it must be done if you wish to ever hold hands with a pair of [Imps]
>>
>>5025417
Give me a second to do the lords wordk
>>
>>5025417
Third row from the right, fourth from the bottom.
>>
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>>5025432
Fuck using a mousepad
>>
>>5025417
I’m pretty sure it’s this one.
>>
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Ya got em'. All the remaining Gribblets scatter leaving you with all the spoils. The [Imps] looking down on you means you can't claim any of it though. No good deed goes unpunished.
>>
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"Weird! Weird! Why is he still here?"
"Finished! Finished! His task is complete! "
"Creep! Creep! He is thinking about our underwear!"
"Alas! Alas! We traded one pest for another! "

"Alright girls you are safe for now, if you need anything just call"

"AAH! AAH! He is trying to look heroic!"
"Lame! Lame! We already know he is a villain!"
"Reward! Reward! I bet he secretly expects a reward!"
"No way! No way! He was only doing what is expected!"
"Get out! Get out! We'll call you if we need you!"
"Brigand! Brigand! Your service is now complete~"

>What do?
- Time to find the [Sorceress] (+1 story point)
- [Imps] related Write in
>>
>>5025533
>Take their underwear anyway--if we're the landlord, that's rent
>- Time to find the [Sorceress] (+1 story point)
>>
>>5025533
>Slap their asses
>Leave to slap Sorceress’ ass
>>
>>5025533
>Give the imps a kiss on non-matching cheeks, to tell them apart better of course
>Go to the [sorc]
>>
>>5025533
>- Time to find the [Sorceress] (+1 story point)
>>
>>5025535
Supporting
>>
>>5025535
sounds good to me
>>
>>5025566
Kiss them with what?

>>5025535
>>5025534
Sounds good.
>>
>>5025535
yes
>>
>>5025702
Nothing, that way nothing actually happens
>>
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You wait for the perfect angle, then strike once they are lined up for a double booty slap! One hand, four cheeks!

"KYAA! KYAA! He assaulted our posteriors!"
"EEEK! EEEK! He is a molester!"
"Police! Police! Someone call the police!"
"Ruined! Ruined! I have been despoiled!"
"Just wait! Just wait! When you least expect it!"
"Revenge! Revenge! Our reprisal will come!"

What ever comes, it will be well worth it...
>>
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The [Imps] promise of revenge reminds you that you are sitting at 1 hp. So you decide to take a nap in your coffin before you set out again to heal up. Yet before you do, you would still like to visit the [Sorceress]. You check her workshop but she doesn't seem to be present. So you check the other rooms.

Not here...
>>
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Nor here...

Well, whatever. You will have to catch her later.
>>
>>5026043
Is the HP right? It says the same for both.
>>
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You head down to your private quarters to take that well deserved nap, only to find the [Sorceress] where you least expected! In your coffin! She is sleeping... Understandable, so many people here banging pots and pans now its hard to find a quite place to catch some shuteye. Still, you have need of your coffin if you are going to be FULLY healed for the next dungeon. Its a shame to wake the [Sorceress] though.

>What do?
- Let her sleep (Start next run with 70% hp)
- Wake her up and boot her out (Start next run with 100% hp)
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
>>5026063
>- Let her sleep (Start next run with 70% hp)
's all good, we don't need that much HP anyways.
>>
>>5026063
>Snuggle in next to her
>>
>>5026063
>- Write in (-1 story point)

Tell her to scoot over, she’s in our spot. Then we get in whether she leaves or not. Whatever happens after that happens.
>>
>>5026090
+1
>>
>>5026063
Get in with her.
>>
>>5026063
>Climb in anyway
>>
>>5026092
+1
>>
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You analyze the situation as best as any bachelor can:
- A smooch on the head when you came back
- Sleeping in YOUR coffin
- Her hat is OFF

Oh yeah, these are some STRONG signals. You dive into your coffin with intent to spoon. Yet as soon as you jump into the coffin the [Sorceress] stirs awake.

"Did you want to take a nap? Ill get out of your way." She reaches out and puts her hand on your psudo-face.
>>
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You assure her that is not necessary, there is room enough for the both of you.

"Thats alright, you need your rest. I don't want my cruel black knight to be deprived of sleep on the eve of battle."

Despite your assurance that she could never disturb your rest, the [Sorceress] hops out anyway. Damn, just when you think you got things figured out. Now you don't know what to think. Mixed signals man mixed signals. She is your Lair mate too, if you fuck things up it will be AWKWARD.

Either way, you close the lid for a rest...

Thats all for today, going to pre-draw assets for tomorrow.
>>
>>5026274
>>5026277
Wait, did the Sorceress steal our head so we'd be out all day and she could sleep in our totally ballin' coffin?
>>
>>5026388
Awww shiiit. There's going to be an ass-slapping reckoning if so.
>>
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You wake up the next day, and oh damn its LATE! Well, its better to start a little late then never start at at all right?

You flip right out of your coffin and head upstairs. You grab the [Imps] by their belts and toss the [Judas Priest] over your shoulder as you hornet-line towards the exit.
No time to waste on the little things! You got to go go go to the meat of the quest as fast as possible!

As you are running out of the Lair and into [nightmare]s stable, you get ambushed by the [Sorceress]...
>>
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"Going out already? I thought you would stay a little longer." she pouts at you

"No time babe, There will be plenty time to rest when I get my head back"

"a shame really, well I got something for you..."

The [Sorceress] presents you with a [Packed lunch], you can consume this to regain +50 HP. Wow how thoughtful!

"Its a little bento box, I thought since you have been working so hard you probably haven't had a chance to make your own meal."
>>
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With your affairs settled, you ride for the [Vampire] Castle with your party.
>>
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Yep, that's gloomy alright. Like something out of a black and white horror movie, has [vampire] written all over it. The only thing left to decide is your strategy of attack!

>What do?
- Like a thundering axe, loudly announce your presence and demand the [vampire] show herself!
- Like a skewering spear, Kick down the front gate and just start smashing up the place!
- Like a falling shadow, silently enter through the rear service entrance!
>>
>>5027052
>Skewering Spear Maneuver
>>
>>5027052
>Like a falling shadow, silently enter through the rear service entrance!
I'll take the vampire's rear entrance for $500
>>
>>5027052
- Like a falling shadow, silently enter through the rear service entrance!
We tried going all direct last time, let's try something different.
>>
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You decide to switch it up this time and go for a more subtle approach. If the [Vampire] is alerted to your presence she may attempt to hide or dispose of your head. It would be much better to catch her in the act!

You and your party creep around to the back service entrance, as you do you notice the LARGE amount of mooks guarding the front door. All ready and waiting to do chip damage. There were mooks in the [Warlock]'s cove but this amount is almost overwhelming! The [Vampire] seems to be expecting a fight!
>>
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Your dreams of entering the castle without hassle are cut as short as the MC. There is someone guarding the service door! A [Bat-maid] on her break having a smoke. You try to creep past her...

"Sister! Sister! The [Black Knight] is being a creep!"
"I see! I see! He's quite experienced at it!"

The [Imps] chattering alerts the [Bat-maid] to your presence!

"Eh? Who is there? What do you want?"

>What do
- Cant let her alert the guards! FIGHT NOW!
- Try to talk your way out of this situation (Write in)
- Tell her you work here and are here to start your first shift
>>
>>5027094
>Try to talk your way out of this situation
"Sorry, just trying to deliver these [Imps] for the dinner but I was running late and didn't want to get caught."
>>
>>5027094
Time to bluff
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=z14uhNXcx-s
>>
>>5027101
Wouldn't it work better if we said we were delivering the judas priest?
>>
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Roll for persuasion 1d20
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>5027131
>>
Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>5027131
>>
Is this roll high or roll low? Lol
>>
Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>5027131
rollerooni
>>
>>5027127
Maybe but then we wouldn't be implying the [Imps] should get eaten for messing with our plans.

Actually I think saying we were delivering a priest to a vampire might be exactly the wrong way to go.
>>
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"Well you see, the thing is, well uh..."

The [Bat-Maid] starts to extrude a menacing aura.

You grab the [Imps] by the ankle and pull them down

"Eek! Eek! This is Assault!"
"Aah! Aah! Don't thread on me!"

"You see I'm here to deliver these [Imps] to the [Vampire], she special ordered them alive and kicking. The madam was in the mood for something exotic tonight. So, uh, can I come in?"
>>
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She looks PISSED.
>>
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"Oh, ok. Go right in then" The [Bat-Maid] returns to her cigarette.

You successfully trick the [Bat-maid] and skip over the combat sequence your QM spent some much time thinking about and preparing. Well done! The path into the castle is now clear.

>What do
- Go right in and figure things out yourself
- Ask to be lead to the [Vampire] chambers
- Fight her anyway! (+1 story point)
>>
>>5027158
>- Ask to be lead to the [Vampire] chambers
"So uhh...since I'm late and can't just drop them off with the guy, would you mind helping me out and telling me where the [Vampire]'s quarters are?
>>
- Go right in and figure things out yourself
She very clearly doesn't want to be bothered in her smoke break.
>>
>>5027169
Okay, I'll concede that
>>
>>5027169
support.
>>
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Not wanting to disturb the [Bat-maid] further, you leave her to the ciggy she is sucking down and head right in. The service entrance is bereft of mooks to fight so you make it pretty deep in the castle until...

You almost walk right into a trap! Your dead stop causes a small pile up of bodies. What kind of asshole leaves a trap in the middle of an extremely tight corridor? Who ever it was, their traps efficacy will be unwitnessed by their own eyes.

>what do?
- Waste time attempting to disarm the trap
- just power through it, you have hp for days (-10 hp)
- write in
>>
>>5027191
>- write in
The imps can fly, ask them to cary the team accross the traps on the ground. If they deny ask them they must do it to make up for almost ruining our sneaking.
>>
>>5027193
How about if they refuse we just use one of them to 'disarm' the trap as punishment for almost ruining our sneaking?
>>
>>5027191
>Due to having an amazing sword of indistinguishable quality we can just stick that in the trap and be on our malicious way
>>
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Using your SUPERIOR problem solving brain you realize that the [Imps] can fly, so you have them carry everyone across and over the trap. They seem unwilling to help at first but you threaten them by saying that you really WILL feed them to the [Vampire]. With great reluctance they eventually agree.

"Oof! Oof! We aren't built for this!"
"Aah! Aah! I have a STEM degree and this is my life..."

They get the job done but the [Imps] are now EXHAUSTED.
>>
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You are overcoming every encounter without losing any HP, but your luck may have run out as you turn the corner and come face to face with the a towering armoured figure.This knight's posture is so tight and their vigil so dauntless you thought they were just an armour stand. Yet now they move to block your way!

"Who dare'eth enter the domain of the [Vampire] without invitation? Speak'eth now, for you stand before the [Black Knight]! I will suffer'eth no trespass, and will collect the heads of all who risk combat with my dread sword "Hope'sEclipse".

Wait a minute, I thought you were the [Black knight]? damn, did you steal this guys shtick? To think I had respect for you. He even talks with a cool medieval accent and his head is way better then yours.

>What do? (Story point counter: 0)
- No one steals your style and gets away with it! FIGHT
- There is only room for ONE [Black Knight] in this setting! FIGHT
- "Nice hat" I think ill take it! FIGHT
- Compliment the [Black Knight] on their wicked cool aesthetic (+2 [Black Knight] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- WRITE IN Banter (+-?? [Black Knight] FP)(FREE ACTION)
- Write in (-1 Story points)
>>
File: There can only be one.gif (1.42 MB, 480x250)
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>>5027229
>- There is only room for ONE [Black Knight] in this setting! FIGHT
>>
>>5027229
>- Compliment the [Black Knight] on their wicked cool aesthetic (+2 [Black Knight] FP)(FREE ACTION)
>- There is only room for ONE [Black Knight] in this setting! FIGHT
>>
>>5027237
Support.
>>
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You, the [Black Knight], compliments the [True Black Knight]'s wicked sick aesthetic style.

"Verily" the [Black Knight] replies in a cool and aloof tone. Wow, what a dream boat!

>- There is only room for ONE [Black Knight] in this setting! FIGHT

You square up for a fight and your stance is mimicked by the opposing knight. You exchange a few blows and quickly analyze your opponent. It seems that your fighting styles may look the same on the surface level, but there is a key difference. This [Black Knight] focuses on DEFENCE while you focus on OFFENCE!

Even though you can land blows it seems not to be doing any damage at all. Is due to the very high DEF gear your opponent is wearing. You are going to have to destroy their armour if you want to get anything done...

>RULES OF COMBAT!
1. You must ROLL a 2d20!
2. You must DECLARE where you want to attack!
3. The first roll is DAMAGE, the second roll is ARMOUR BREAK!
4. Attacks on the SWORD do NO damage but a successful ARMOUR BREAK disarms them for 1 round of combat.
5. Every Failed ARMOUR BREAK! on a piece of armour reduces its BREAK threshold by 1
6. Your damage is subtracted by the enemies Armour Value
>>
Rolled 7, 4 = 11 (2d20)

>>5027279
>Attack the Cuisses and Faulds
>>
Rolled 17, 15 = 32 (2d20)

>>5027279
Git dem GREAVES.
>>
Rolled 9, 2 = 11 (2d20)

>>5027279
Let's start easy, begin with the greaves
>>
Rolled 9, 18 = 27 (2d20)

>>5027279
Helmet.
>>
Rolled 12 (1d15)

>>
Good thing we've got +2 from the [Judas Priest]
>>
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You Chop low, Kick low and take out the [Black Knight]s Greaves! Still, they have Armour to spare and you do no damage.

As reward for your hard work the [Black Knight] delivers a single devastating attack for 12 damage!!

>FIGHT (Your HP: 88)
>>
Rolled 20, 3 = 23 (2d20)

>>5027314
Get their sword.
>>
Rolled 16, 18 = 34 (2d20)

>>5027316
Good idea
>>
Rolled 12, 8 = 20 (2d20)

>>5027314
Chest piece.
>>
Rolled 11, 5 = 16 (2d20)

>>5027314
>>Attack the Cuisses and Faulds
>>
Rolled 4, 5 = 9 (2d20)

>>5027314
>Sword
>>
Rolled 17, 8 = 25 (2d20)

>>5027314
Get her sword and dual weild.
>>
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Oh yea, the [Judas priest] bonus, you forgot all about it. If he was doing his job you would have got the [Dark Knight]'s helmet in the last round. You angrily shake your sword at him and he starts playing his POWER lute, providing you with a +2 bonus to your rolls.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dh1qqLbuBww
>>
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You swing at the [Black knights] sword, temporarily disarming them! You over do it a bit in fact! Even when its clear of their hand you keep swinging at it in your murderous rage! You get some more superficial swings in on their armour. Their AC is still too high to do HP damage!

The [Black Knight] retrieves their sword and grips it tightly! Increasing the difficulty of the next disarm!

>FIGHT (Your HP: 88)
>>
Rolled 15, 4 = 19 (2d20)

>>5027413
Chestpiece.
>>
Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d20)

>>5027413
Cuisses and Frauds next.
>>
Rolled 19, 18 = 37 (2d20)

>>5027413
Chestpiece
>>
Rolled 6 (1d15)

>>
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You swing with less zeal this time but your attacks are much more potent! You devastate the [Black Knights] chest piece, revealing the pink soft centre mass! From here on out your attacks are sure to be much more devastating!

The [Black Knight] Calmly delivers a respectable counter blow for 6 damage!

>FIGHT (Your HP: 82)
>>
Rolled 17, 16 = 33 (2d20)

>>5027443
Helmet
>>
>>5027446
After we get one more piece off let's just keep on knocking the sword out of her hands until she gives up (or dies, I guess)
>>
Rolled 5, 3 = 8 (2d20)

>>5027443
Cusses and Faulds
>>
>>5027446
Nice
>>
Rolled 1, 12 = 13 (2d20)

>>5027443
>>
>>5027483
you have to aim at something
>>
>>5027486
He's too chivalrous to hit a woman, he was aiming at the space adjacent to her.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d15)

>>
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You bring a powerful blow down upon the [Black Knight]'s head! Almost shattering it but its powerful protection HOLD! The blow still caused them to stagger and take 7 HP damage.

Your repeated attacks on the knights Cusses and Faulds are respectable, but have yet to do anything.

The return swing hits you for 8 damage

>FIGHT (Your HP: 74)
>>
Rolled 12, 10 = 22 (2d20)

>>5027494
Cusses and faulds
>>
Rolled 16, 4 = 20 (2d20)

>>5027494
Cuisses and faults
>>
Rolled 13, 14 = 27 (2d20)

>>5027494
That goddamn helmet
>>
Rolled 8 (1d15)

>>
Rolled 3, 12 = 15 (2d20)

>>5027494
>Helmet!
>>
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After clapping the [Dark Knight]'s thighs over and over you finally break through the armour! Without his defences the [Dark Knights] HP quickly starts to tumble down down down!

Yet that helmet still wont come off!

The return swing hits you for 8 damage

>FIGHT (Your HP: 66)
>>
Rolled 17, 12 = 29 (2d20)

>>5027517
Arm armor
>>
Rolled 20, 12 = 32 (2d20)

>>5027517
Helmet
>>
Rolled 3, 7 = 10 (2d20)

>>5027517
Fukkin helmet, or sword if the helmet is already broken.
>>
Rolled 1, 7 = 8 (2d20)

>>5027517
>ARM-our
>>
Rolled 18, 9 = 27 (2d20)

>>5027517
helmet
>>
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Your overwhelming assault has won you the day. Unlike your armour, that is made from pure plot and has been stitched up more times then you can count by the [sorceress], this knights armour was home made and ultimately came apart. Yet despite your best attempts to decapitate, the Knights helmet never failed them and stayed secure on their head.

"I yield! thou hast bested me in combat and earned the right to continue. I shall stand in thouest way no further..."

You took 44 HP in damage from the battle, that's nothing to sneer at.

>What do?
- And don't you forget it! Move on to the next zone
- THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE, Decapitate / slay the knight (+1 story point)
- Brutally defend you Intellectual property and destroy their remaining armour.
- Write in
>>
>>5027555
> Brutally defend you Intellectual property and destroy their remaining armour.

that helmet will come off, with or without the head still inside.
>>
>>5027555
>- Brutally defend you Intellectual property and destroy their remaining armour.
>Slap dat ass

Nice trips!
>>
>>5027555
Take that damn helmet.

Also eat the packed lunch, that hurt more than expected.
>>
>>5027555
>- Brutally defend you Intellectual property and destroy their remaining armour.
You shall be a knight no more, find another role you copycat.
>>
>>5027566
Supporting both.
>>
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You decide to viciously defend your IP and bring an immediate HALT to this unlicensed recreation of your image. You violently strip this false knight of their last remaining pieces of armour and take their hilariously cool name changing sword replica too. When you remove the helmet you find a HEAD under it. Horrific, if you had the facial muscles it would have been enough to bring you to a state of cringe.

Now that their helmet is off, you suddenly realize that you are actually dealing with a women here. Women can't be knights, at best they can be some kind of DEX based rapier guys or rogues. You don't make the rules, you just brutally enforce them. Also you make the rules.

The [Null Space] doesn't put up and resistance as you strip them down to their underwear and Horsemen Con 2019 shirt.
>>
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"It was an honour to duel you. If I am to be disgraced, then I am glade it was by your hand."

You make ready your dynamic exit.

"Before'eth you go, could you sign this book for me? I think your work in early 18th century beheadings were revolutionary. I have done my best to follow and apply your teachings in my own life. It would mean a lot to me."

>What do
- Sign book
- Further berate them, "You shall be a knight no more, find another role you copycat."
- Offer Squire-ship program
- Slap ass

>EXTRA
- Eat lunch now for 34 HP
- Save it
>>
>>5027591
>- Sign book
>- Offer Squire-ship program
>- Slap ass

>- Save it
>>
>>5027593
Sure, we've regenerated 10 hp out of nowhere so eating it is less important now
>>
>>5027595
I actually deducted 10 hp by accident earlier with a typo
>>
>>5027593
Support
>>
>>5027591
>- Sign book
>- Slap ass
>Other: THOSE SHOES ARE ARMOUR TOO TAKE THEM OFF! Didn't think I'd notice huh?
>>
>>5027593
+1
>>
>>5027591
backing >>5027593 but include
>Other: THOSE SHOES ARE ARMOUR TOO TAKE THEM OFF! Didn't think I'd notice huh?
>>
>>5027736
Good point
>>
>>5027591
>Sign
>Offer Squire-ship
>Dat Ass
>Save Lunch

>>5027613
Also dis.
>>
>>5027591
>- Sign book
>- Offer Squire-ship program
>- Slap ass
>- Save it
>>
>>5027591
>sign book
>offer squire-ship program
She can become a dame (female title for knight)
>Slap ass
We gotta
>>
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You take her book and look it over, its full of personally written notes and bookmarks to various pages, its a 7th edition and the binding has been rebound several times due to its heavy use. You sign your name in BLOOD on the first page. You can almost see a smile appear on the [NULL SPACE] grim face.

As a follow up, you give her exposed rear a firm and respectful slap deserving of a fine warrior. Something she can tell her friends about.

She finds the act quite confusing, and almost looks puzzled.

"If I may be so bold my lord, why did thou'est apply a five finger strike onto my posterior?"

You are more disappointed with the women then angry.

"Forgiveth me, I have dishonoured you with my question."

"NAY! You have dishonoured YOURSELF!"

Your reply sends the women reeling

"I don't understand..."

"Ma'dam you play the part well and you swing your sword with skill, but from that question alone I can see that you have not the faintest Idea what it means to be a [Black Knight]"

You have destroyed her.

"Yet... You are not irredeemable. With some proper instruction you could one day hope to be a third rate [black knight], second rate if you apply yourself. I would be willing to take you on as a [Black Squire], but know that I am a merciless instructor and most of my juniors have lost their heads following me into battle"

"To junior under'eth you? It would be an honour sire!"
>>
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FASHION SOULS GAME, dress up your new squire by drawing over her in MS paint or by returning some of her gear.

>return gear: Specify what parts
>draw gear: MS paint it
>>
>>5028012
I'm gonna be real with ya QM

I have absolutely no fuckin' idea
>>
>>5028012
I have several ideas, one sec
>>
>>5028012
>>5028034
I have other things im still making but this needed to be posted asap
>>
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>>5028036
>>5028012
idfk
If she ends up not covered somewhere give here a piece of armor to cover it (except the helmet, those glasses are best in slot)
>>
How's about a piece of armor that says TRAINEE
>>
>>5028012
Make a properly sized version of our armor to her with a few differences of course, like a trainee in her chest to show she is learning from us.
>>
>>5028012
I tried my best but my hands started to hurt
Mobile ms paint fucking sucks!
>>
>>5028048
>That single fucked line on the sword
ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!
>>
>>5028038
>8 ball choker
I mean, now thats good content
>>
>>5028012
reverse bunnysuit
>>
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>>5028012
I redesigned the whole thing. Behold my awesome OC.
>>
>>5028093
+1
>>
>>5028048
I do like the broken sword for a weapon
>>
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"Alright then, as your first act as my protegee im going to need you to strip butt naked. Your attire needs an overhaul. The [Black Knight] brand is very specific."

Without hesitation the [Black Squire] starts to slide her underwear down her legs

"No, no, no, not like that! You need to be more AGGRESSIVE like so..." You rip her shirt right off her body! She follows your lead and rips her underwear off her body in one swift motion.

"Alright, now lets try something like this..."

>>5028038
>>5028039
>>5028042
>>5028048
>>5028093
>>5028103

Built for SPEED and POWER

>What do?
- It will do
- Its a good first attempt, incorporate this... (Specify)
- No, no, no, try again!
>>
>>5028175
>- It will do
I like her, she's got style.

But not as an waifu option for Odysseus. She's our trainee. We're a dark knight, not an hollywood celebrity.
>>
>>5028175
That's pretty slick, it will do
>>
>>5028175
It will do. Tell her that she has taken her first step forth on the path to being a proper Black Knight, but there are many more steps to go. A knight must understand form and function, style and protection.
>>
>>5028175
>Slap that ass
>>
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Now that she has cool black speedatute armour, she is ready to follow you around and learn what it means to be a true blackguard.

"It will be an honour to serve under you sire."

You give her another firm slap on the ass. However, its not a warriors slap like last time. You give her the slap of a trainee who has miss stepped. This one stings and she almost flinches.

"It will be a dishonour to serve under you sire"

Better, but its not quite there yet.

"You have a long way to go, but I think you have what it takes. Form and function, style and protection, this is the first and last lesson you will learn"

The [Dark Squire] quickly takes down what you have said into her notebook.'
>>
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You enter the third and final room before the boss fight. Its less of a room however, and more of a large open balcony connecting the [vampire]'s spire with the rest of the castle. Blocking your path is a humble nun! The [Judas priest] recognizes her instantly.

"Thats the sister superior! She was one of the maidens I was supposed to save!"

He tries to get her attention but she remains frozen and unmoving.

>what do?
- This is clearly a trap, ATTACK! (-5 [Judas Priest] FP)
- Try to get the [Sister Superior] attention (+1 story point)
- Try to skip this encounter
- Write in (-1 story point)
>>
- Try to get the [Sister Superior] attention (+1 story point)
ok
>>
>>5028241
>Try to get the [Sister Superior]'s attention
>>
>>5028241
>Try to get the [Sister Superior] attention (+1 story point)
>Poke their forehead
>>
>getting our biggest fan to dislike us
Why are you like this, anon?

>>5028241
Is that a halo or a moon?
>>
>>5028241
>- Try to get the [Sister Superior] attention (+1 story point)
>>
>>5028241
>Slap dat holy ass!
>>
>>5028260
+1
>>
>>5028241
>- Try to get the [Sister Superior] attention (+1 story point)
>>
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<- .GIF

Its probably a trap, its most likely a trap, yeah its some kind of trap. Yet there is no way around it but to bulldoze your way through what ever ambush awaits you.

You move towards the [Sister Superior] and try to get her attention by calling out the name [Judas Priest] gave you. Yet she stays quite and serene. Even when you are standing an arms length away from here she refuses to budge or acknowledge you!

You press your finger right on her forehead like its a power button and she comes to life.

"n-no.. m-my concentration! rr-r-run... RUN!!"

Her meek voice turns into a howl as she pleads for you to make your escape, but its too late! Combat is upon you as the sister transforms!

You lash out against her just as she lashes out against you! Blow for blow, strike for strike! Yet with every flurry the [Sister Lycan]'s wounds regenerate!

>RULES OF COMBAT!
1. You must ROLL a 1d10!
2. You must DECLARE if you want the [Judas Priest] +2 effect on your role. Otherwise it wont count!
3. Every roll # will be added to the TOTAL!
4. Should the TOTAL! go over 21 the lycan will regenerate! And you lose the round!
5. OP Will roll until he hits 15 or over, if OP rolls higher then 21 then he will lose the round
6. If no one rolls over 21, the winner will be the one with the highest TOTAL!
7. Win TWO rounds to beat the lycan, lose 15 HP per lost round.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>5028321
Judas, help clean up your mess!
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>5028321
Judas Priest help with this roll.
>>
>>5028328
>>5028329
Yep, let's stop at 16 for now
>>
Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>5028329
>>5028328
>>5028331
Actually fuckit, without the Judas Priest we've got 50/50
>>
Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>5028336
>>
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15 vs 17

Rounds won: 1
Needed: 2

ROUND 2: GO!
>>
>>5028337
oh snap, 15 exactly
we win round 1 lads
>>
>>5028337
AYYYYYYYYYYYY
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>5028340
judas helps with this roll
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>5028340
Judas Priest help with this roll!
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>5028340
If no one has rolled after this >>5028344 >>5028346

I'm rolling, and without Judas.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>
>>5028347
STAND
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>5028348
>>
>>5028347
oh man if you kept judas it would have been a perfect 21
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>5028350
>>
>>5028352
pog
>>
17 vs 19

Rounds won: 2
Needed: 2

FLAWLESS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4nSZ79fXO8
>>
>>5028352
We did it boyz
>>
>>5028354
Glad we're lookin hot now that we've got an apprentice to train up
>>
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A flawless victory, you strike a cool pose and you see the [Dark Squire] taking NOTES. The collapsed Lycan twists and turns until she returns to her [Sister Superior] form. The [Judas Priest] is at her side immediately. Her voice is soft and meek.

"Dark warrior, you have subdued the beast within me but you have not beaten it. Soon it will rise again..."

you know what she is going to say, you can feel it. It is not as apparent to the priest.

"Sister... what are you saying?"

"You must destroy... me before I do more harm..."

"How can you even consider that? There must be some other way!"

>What do?
- This nun must be purged (+2 story point, -10 [Judas Priest] FP)(This kills the [sister superior])
- You will live, and you will learn to control it
- I leave this in your hands [Judas Priest], (Don't get involved)
- Write in
>>
>>5028369
>- You will live, and you will learn to control it
>Slap that holy ass!
>>
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>>5028369
So it's a moon.

>pic related
>>
>>5028369
>- I leave this in your hands [Judas Priest], (Don't get involved
>>
>>5028370
Support I am sure sorceress can do something about it since she knows a lot of magical mumbo-jumbo, I think we should also slap Judas Priest but for good measure.
>>
>>5028373
its both
>>
>>5028374
Supporting this
I believe we should let the Priest do her job, and its unique dialogue!
>>
>>5028378
I’ll +1 slapping the Judas Priest‘s ass as well!
>>
>>5028378
+1
>>
>>5028369
Those storypoints sure are tempting but wouldn't a Dark Knight who's Lairmate is buddies with a Vampire have some werewolf buddies? I say we tell her to live and throw her at them at the next earliest convenience.
>>
>>5028370
Supporting this, but not the judas priest part because that's gay as hell
>>
>>5028599
It's about dominance you schmuck. It is (mostly) non-sexual.
>>
>>5028370
If you mean the Sister by 'slap that holy ass' i'm in.
>>
>>5028615
If you slap a man's ass, you are the homo.
>>
>>5028636
>he doesn't broslap his bros or bitchslap little bitches
ghey
>>