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File: BCBQ - Title.png (52 KB, 743x860)
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You are Jebediah Snippington the 3rd and you play the banjo, if it wasn't obvious already you a fiddler crab. You find yourself in your very large tank on display in the Texas county fair, which county? how would you know you're a crab. People surround your tank and gawk at you as you merrily play your banjo, sadly they can't hear you because you are submerged in a tank of water, at least they look impressed.

What would you like to do?
>>
wish I had a rocking chair
>>
>>4782809
WAIL THE EIGHT FORBIDDEN NAMES
>>
Make sure you're not in Travis County, you can tell by the excessive rainbow diarrea everywhere
>>
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>>4782813
>>4782814
>>4782815
You squint your stalked eyes and see out of the tank, you see a tide of yokels, their overweight asses caked in rainbow diarrea, the scent of steamed crab wafts over to you, suddenly you realise why they are starring at you with such hunger in their stalkless eyes...

You're time might be numbered Jebediah Snippington the 3rd, what will you do?
>>
play one last tune
>>
>>4782844
>>4782851
Play Fire on the Mountain, the faster you play the bigger you get
>>
>>4782862
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uMWbZj-gWg&ab_channel=MarshallTuckerVEVO
It's the only way
>>
File: BCBQ 2.gif (110 KB, 894x749)
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>>4782851
>>4782862
>>4782877
Of course! you begin to strum and play Fire on the Mountain, picking up speed you begin to grow more and more! eventually you smash forth from your glass imprisonment and the onlookers begin to scatter, not before you grab one and snip him in half with your mighty claw! The county fair lies empty, what will you do now?
>>
>>4782903
Continue playing the song, we can't stop until we've finished the music.
>>
>>4782903
Don't stop, we must become HUEG. Try and find a big rig if you can though, gotta get big in style
>>
>>4782903
>>4782905
on top of the ferris wheel
>>
>>4782903
Continue playing the song whilst shitting crab shits on the ferris wheel
>>
File: BCBQ 3.png (24 KB, 894x749)
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>>4782905
>>4782910
>>4782912
>>4782924

You scuttle with pride to the ferris wheel and and clamber to the top most point, here you survey your new domain, the time of man is over, the age of the crab is begun, all whilst you thrash Fire On The Mountain on your enormous banjo, all of Travis County will know and fear you, the banjo music falls silent as you stare out over the plains.

Where will you go next?
>>
>>4782937
The food cart. We gonna grab us some funnel cake.
>>
>>4782949
+1
Maybe write a song for the funnel cake?
>>
We need to spread our music to the world, but without selling out to the (((record labels))).
>>
Alternatively, we could go to Schmeckelzogberg Records and sign a TV/radio deal
>>
File: BCBQ 4.png (14 KB, 894x749)
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>>4782949
>>4783061
>>4784183
You clamber down from the ferris wheel and scuttle your merry way to the food cart. You quickly shovel funnel cake into your crabby maw and it inspires you, it inspires you to write a song, all about how much you like funnel cake and how you'll never sell out to (((record labels))), a few hours pass as you perfect your new song. as you grow hungry again you turn around to see the national guard has been called in to put a stop to your crustacean shenanigans...

How will you react to the tanks and choppers?
>>
>>4784557
I hear a lot of the US military is good old southern boys. Play "Take Me Home, Country Roads" until they are too distraught with sentimental human emotion to fight.
>>
>>4784576
Some of them are likely fallout-zoomers, which would also help. This.
>>
File: BCBQ5.gif (62 KB, 894x470)
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>>4784576
>>4784591
You begin to play a soulful rendition of "Take Me Home, Country Roads" soon the foolish humans are shedding tears of joy and pain as they lament their lost loves and think about the homes they may never return to... As they are distracted you snip the head off one of the officers and quickly dispatch the rest of them, tearing tanks asunder as you cut you're way through the line of men. Soon the bloodshed is over and you are left with only the dead for company.

Where will you go now Jebediah Snippington?
>>
>>4784617
Back to the sea.
>>
>>4784626
This, let's leave the land behind
>>
File: BCBQ6.png (21 KB, 894x470)
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>>4784626
>>4784674
You begin your slow scuttle back to the waters of your ancestors, passing over towns and cities as you make you're way home. you are met with little resistance and you feel that maybe these humans know you simply wish to leave them. days pass before you eventually reach the East Coast of Texas... strangely their are people, watching and waiting for you to go, it seems all of Texas is enamoured with where you will go next, As you are about to set claw into the ocean the water begins to bubble and boil, you're instincts kick in, a human trap? but the humans seems just as shocked and fearful, suddenly a monstrous being erupts from the waters and charges. HOLY SHIT IT'S A KAIJU!

How will you defend yourself Snippington??
>>
>>4784739
Challenge the giant fella to a banjo battle and then mock his lack of stringed sex machine (banjo)
>>
>>4784756
This, we'll cut him down with some bluegrass
>>
File: BCBQ7.png (29 KB, 714x470)
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>>4784756
>>4784757
You draw the banjo from back and begin to tune up, the challenge is clear to all present and with a curt nod of it's scaled head the Kaiju accepts your duel. In a flash the towering creature draws a banjo from it's back and you almost question why it has such a large and well crafted instrument but you quickly snap back to the matter at hand. the Kaiju plays an outstanding rendition of 'Highwayman' before an awe struck crowd, as the song finishes the crowd of terrified humans all turn to you, a single voice cries out: "You've got this Jebediah!"

With the human support you're sure to win but what will you play?
>>
>>4784773
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_Y3mnj-8lA&ab_channel=PoisonClan73
'Foggy Mountain Breakdown', no contest.
>>
>get in mech suit shaped like a crab with mech banjo
>play Banjo Version of Super Gore Nest
https://youtu.be/8nZyemRSN-A
>>
>>4784783
SUPPORT. FULL SUPPORT.
>>
File: BCBQ8.png (26 KB, 714x470)
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>>4784783
>>4785336
You begin your version of 'Foggy Mountain Breakdown' and the crowd goes silent, furiously you pick your big crab banjo with your big crab claws, as you shred to your big crab hearts content you begin to grow again for the faster you play the larger you become. by the end of the 2 minutes and 43 seconds you're stalks are at eye level with the Kaiju, who with a defeated roar turns to stomp back towards the waters, Texas is protected, by a big crab with a big banjo and an even bigger heart. The people however are silent.

How will you address your audience?
>>
>>4785772
Pee on them
>>
>>4785779
No other way, +1
>>
>>4785779
They'll understand, you are an animal after all, plus it might end up on "America's funniest kaiju battles"
>>
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>>4785779
>>4786030
>>4786215

You take a heroic piss on the humans who begin to shriek and dart for cover, after a good 30seconds of urination the peeing subsides and the humans scrabble out from whatever cover they had at hand in stunned silence they watch you, a mixture of fear and admiration. a single human voice cries out: "he saved us! hooray for Jebediah Snippington!" then the whole crowd erupts into cheering, it seems saving all of Texas from a Kaiju has it's perks.

Where will you go no Snippington? What will you do? what will you play? and who will you pee on?
>>
>>4786375
Piss directly in our own mouth while playing Cotton Eye Joe. Destroy any Texan who leaves this performance.
>>
>>4786530
Never thought I'd write those two sentences either on their own or one after the other. based /qst/
>>
>>4786530
This, some things are necessary
>>
>>4786375
Anything but >>4786530.

Playing Cotton Eye Joe before leaving for the sea sounds ideal.
>>
This story has been absolutely amazing. This is Shakespeare. This is Homer. This isn't a Big Crab Banjo Quest, no... This is the Big Crab Banjo Oddyssey.

Play on, Jebidiah. Play on.
>>
File: BCBQ END.png (20 KB, 714x470)
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You take a heroic finally scuttle in the sea, passing beneath the waves with your trusty banjo on your back. The waters feels nice against your shell and you snip a sigh of relief, it's good to be home.

Quest End.

your Quest Master will return with something equally silly by the end of the week.
>>
File: Congratulations.gif (409 KB, 498x366)
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>>4788538
Bravo, QM! Bravo!
>>
>>4788538
This was a god-tier quest QM sama
>>
>>4788538
Rest easy, Jeb.

Thanks, QM!
>>
based big crab with a banjo
>>
>>4788538
Good quest OP, I'd recommend a tripcode if you plan on making this a habit





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