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File: snappin_turtle.jpg (474 KB, 1024x768)
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Instant nopes.

If I hear any tell of snapping turtles in the water, I'm out. I like my toes.
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>>2088879
Chomp!
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>>2088879
If i happen across a herd of goats and they start eyeing me im outta there
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>>2088879
are there snapping turtles in europe? for me, big grasshoppers with fake stingers are a big nope. I don't like big disgusting explosive insects.
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Was going to post leeches but then I got noped the fuck out by google images
https://youtu.be/Bhx11cqwG6g
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>>2088988
Ive gotten used to Leeches as Ive fished more. Ticks still piss me the fuck off.
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I still get scared like a bitch whenever I see a tick on me. Mosquitos are fine, leeches are fine, spiders are fine; but I fucking hate ticks like nothing else.
Fuck chiggers. Can't wait for the day scientists invent a pathogen that kills them all off
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>>2088879
open dark water
I'm from western Washington and I swim in salt but the big water like actual ocean or the main body of the sound is terrifying for some reason and I won't go more than 10 foot from shore
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>>2088879
>snapping turtles
Reason #473 why conifer country is King.
No snapping turtles.
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>>2088879
The Common Snapping Turtle we have up north (not that Alligator fucker you guys have down south) is pretty docile in water. I've accidentally stepped on them and they just swim away.

On land they get defensive and will bite.
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>>2089205
i came here to post this too, its a reasonable and healthy fear to have. one of the old native people in alaska said something to the effect of "we can never understand the ocean"
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>>2089198
>walk through the grass next to a river in just flip flops
>feel something on my foot
>look down
>it's a tick
>it's not dug in, it's just wandering around on my bare foot
>casually reach down and flick it off
Get fucked you little arachnid bastards
>>
https://youtu.be/UE7YOJVSoIs
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>>2089266
A fox is also satanic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aodwqjvk-ak
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>>2089333
Yep, the three F's are all bone chilling whenthey screech

Fox, fisher, and feline of unusual size
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>>2089333
In the summertime I sleep with the window open from time to time. Waking up to this sound is terrifying. The first time I heard it as a kid I legitimately thought it was a woman screaming in the woods.
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>>2088993
Of all the vampires it's ticks and midgies that put me right out of the mood. The first for disease the second for sheer numerical superiority.
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>>2089198
Whenever I find one (I'm from CT so they're fucking everywhere) I impale it on a needle or tack and burn it with a lighter. They're so tough it's near impossible to squish them, they don't drown underwater, and can go months/years without food or water. Fuck em.
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Nothing as repulsive as a tick, pulling them off my dog Is such a hassle because he won't stay still, used to get freaked out when I started going outdoors because I would Always find One or Two attached to my pants.

Also these motherfuckers, I Always check the ground twice and sleep in a tent now
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>>2090019
Yep.
I lived in Dubai for 8 years and would go desert camping every weekend.
Those and scorpions.
The ones in the mountains would literally chase you for ages.
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>>2090194
what chase you and why ?
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>>2088975
>are there snapping turtles in europe?
Imagine not knowing what a search engine is.
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>>2090212
Ya fuck him for bumping the thread and bolstering community discussion
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>>2090194
I would just like to say FUCK CAMEL SPIDERS WITH A HAMMER
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I hate it when I am too near giant lobsters when diving. They have too many fucking legs. I am not afraid around sharks but I cannot stand giant water insects
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>>2090956
But the water bugs are tasty....
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>>2088879
I just want to climb trees
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>>2090956
Anon. Hey, Anon.
Anon, get this - Lobsters, right?
Lobsters are just Mer-Scorpions.
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>>2088974
do they gang up on people or something?
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>>2090212
imagine trusting j*wgle when you could just get all your info from your out/bros/. if it's not in a 4channel shitpost, I'm not listening
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>>2091188
>he doesn't know
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>>2091188
They are land torpedoes, 2 or 3 you can dodge, but a torpedo volley omae wa mou shindeiro
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>>2090019
One of these crawled up my leg while I was taking a bong rip while outside my porch with like half my fraternity. Arizona is the Australia of the US for sure.
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Bears. I’ve been bumping into them a lot recently and I still piss my pants every time. Just a few weeks ago someone died from a bears tooth puncturing his skull after it attacked him. It just seems entirely up to the bear if it wants to fucking kill you or let you live.
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>>2088879
>>2089238
A common snapper bit me on the foot once when I was wading through a pond. Luckily my waders held up fine and it didn't even hurt, but still a bit eerie.

>>2091390
Fuck bears. Legitimately hate the anxiety of having to think about them and know I'm going to bump into them. Did about 300 miles of hiking in WA last summer and had 7 trail encounters. They piss me off and I throw rocks at them, but they're such massive oafs that they ignore me or take their sweet time waddling away.
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god I hate these fucks, they find a way into my van every fucking road trip I take. Once opened my glove compartment and one of the bastards scurried out, freaked me out bad, always worried one will jump out somewhere while I'm driving.
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>>2088879
Do you just avoid every body of water East of the Mississippi
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>>2091400
I'm just imagining some aspie reeing and coming unglued at the sight of a bear, and the bear just ambles away.
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>>2090002
Stop being a bitch and poorly representing muh state! Bet you aren't even a swamp yankee... fucking posh fag over here...
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>>2091417
Kek, I suppose that is what I probably look like
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>>2091406
These little fuckers are an honest pain, some how every summer they get into my cars airfilter compartment and make a nest with what ever insulation or grass they can find.
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Help me out bros. I am super afraid of snakes, but I can power through and hike through the woods. However, once I see one on the trail, I am a wreck, super paranoud from then on. How do I deal with snake fear? I live know Southeastern US so there's no avoiding them completely.
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>>2091606
Sorry southern bro, best advice is to move. My fear of snakes stemmed from living in the south east
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>>2091606
snakes don't want to fuck with you. even when they're in hunting mode and you're standing a few inches away from them they're not going to do anything - your presence immediately puts them on a timid defensive and they'll only fuck with you if you're not vigilant and step on them or make sudden movements too close to them (particularly if they're cornered) or you're deliberately trying to fuck with them which if you have a fear of snakes you probably won't. i got over my fear of rattlesnakes in particular when i fell down in some brush in joshua tree and saw one maybe two feet away from my face. freaked the fuck out and ran out of the brush and it still hadn't moved. turns out that's standard for rattlesnakes, you can get super close to them and 99.9 percent of the time they won't fuck with you.
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>>2091606
Alabama born n' raised and I fucking love snakes. Pick some up. Don't be a retard and grab a copperhead though. Do you have a yard with some rocks? Lift/tilt the rocks carefully and check for ring-necked, smooth earth, or DeKay's brown snakes (pic related for all 3). They're easy to identify and totally harmless (won't even get snappy with you and couldn't bite you if they tried), so you can interact with them for a bit before letting them go.

Perhaps learn to identify them too. It's much easier to appreciate a black rat snake when you know it's not a cottonmouth. In general though, >>2091660 is right. Don't actively fuck with them and they won't fuck with you. I regularly go out looking for rattlesnakes. They're angry bastards, but they're just gorgeous wimps.

>>2091660
Totally >>2091606's nightmare, but you reminded me of the time I was in lower Alabama looking for eastern indigos in gopher tortoise burrows. I spent the day getting down on my hands and knees shining flashlights down those holes. At one of the holes, I got down, didn't see anything, stood up, turned around, and took one step forward when a 3-foot eastern diamondback lit up its tail behind me. I don't know if you've ever been rattled at by a rattlesnake, but diamondbacks are fucking loud. I've been buzzed by northern pacifics and they just don't compare. It scared the shit out of me and induced what I now considered a mild panic attack. Couldn't catch my breath or get my heart rate down for about 20 minutes.

Turns out it had been sitting on top of the burrow I was looking in, so my face had been just a foot away. If it had decided to strike, I'd have been nailed in the head and would have died. After it alerted me to its presence, it slinked forward and down into the burrow till all I could hear was the rattle reverberating out from the hole. Creepy fucking shit. I still lost my mind a couple years later when I got to see another diamondback though. They're just incredible.
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>>2089198
This. Black bears in my area don't scare me and neither do any of the mammals. I hate waking up in the middle of the night when my leg hair gets pinched in my baselayers and I freak out thinking its a tick and check.
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>>2088879
For me it would have to be a bear. In my state of PA we sure have a fair amount but most fuck off. However the worst thing I want to go through is running into one alone.
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>>2091606
No way to avoid the snakes fellow southeast bro. Get a walking stick. Copperheads are satanic
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>>2090212
Yeah man fuck conversation lets all just go on google, who even needs other people?

I for one embrace our algorithmic overlords.
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>>2091943
Why does the first snake have a prolapse
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>>2090278
Camel Spiders a def creepy but it pisses me off how they are always reported.
>camel killer
>they are massive
>they scream
http://www.buckstix.com/camelspider.htm
It’s all horseshit
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>>2093941
It's a warning display to keep predators from eating it
>be fox
>see snake
>oh look a snack(e)
>snake does curly red tail
>oh fuck that looks dangerous, I will consume road-side garbage instead and get hit by a car

Snakes are smarter than you think, anon.
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hornets and wasps are a gigantic nope. bees are cool. other small shitters are just mildly annoying, but wasps just need to fuck with you and cant understand personal space at all, then get angry if you react to them. I burn every wasp that gets near me, killing them with fire is quite effective because it destroys their wings instantly if you hit them
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Been around them me whole life (south FL) and I still can't. Cool to watch from a distance, but I keep a good ways back from any body of water bigger than a swimming pool. Hell I don't even like swimming pools generally.
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>>2094702
>killing them with fire is quite effective
I think this might help me hash out a lot of my childhood fears.
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>>2091943
>ring-necked
Based. I found one of those guys in my yard recently for the first time in two years. Also found some baby garters and a water snake this year.
Hopefully the rockwalls I'm building will encourage more of them to move in and breed.
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>>2093947
>camel killer
To be fair if the camel isn't in good health, it could. And lots of kept camels are very poorly treated.
>they are massive
They are quite big
>they scream
They do, but it's mostly just the gesture of screaming.
But you missed out the worst part - they are shockingly fucking fast and they chase.
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>>2093947
>http://www.buckstix.com/camelspider.htm
Jesus now that's a trip down memory lane. I wish these barebones homemade HTML sites would make a comeback.
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>>2090002
>>2091418
Another CT native here. No ticks yet this year. So far. I hate the fuckers though.
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>>2091390
Bears are bros.
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>>2094731
>camel killer
How? They're not even venomous lol.
>they are massive
Are you Stuart Little? Their max body size is like 7cm/3in, up to 15 cm/6in with legs. Most species are way smaller than that.
>they scream
No they don't.
>they are fast
10mph so yes, fast. Urban legends often exaggerate to 25mph, but those are false.
>they chase
I mean they'll follow you around if you're providing shade.
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>>2091607
>scared of snakes
>posts pictures of brown water snake
>not even venomous

Come on man. Try a bit harder.
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>>2091297
Kek bring it dumb goats, i'll take a few down with me
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These dumb cunts. First off, they're fucking massive. Second, they're stupid as hell. Third, they've got fuckin terrible attitudes. Look at a moose the wrong way and he WILL charge you. I do not want antlers driven by 700lbs of stupid charging at me.

Black bears are fine. They're pussies. They will run and squeal if you make a sound. I don't have to worry about brown bears.

t. Central Ontario.
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>>2088879
>In Michigan, native born
>Always thought snappers were ridiculous pains
>Got older, moved to GA for a few
> Jesus Christ these things could break your truck
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>>2089198
chigger genocide will be truly glorious. got em stuck under my socks once for an entire night & woke up with something like 120 bites just on the feet & ankles.
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>>2088879
>If I hear any tell of snapping niggers in the street, I'm out. I like my wallet.
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>>2095875
>>2089198
>chiggers

Grew up in the south and never encountered them. I seriously thought, and kinda still think, they are an urban legend there. I have never seen one or been bitten by one.

However
>Spend a summer in the neotropics a couple years ago doing jungle field work
>Sit down on the forest floor to work on something, ankles start to feel weird, like an itching burning sensation
>Ignore it for a bit until I get up, bend down and scratch them
>Soon the burning is on my forearms, itch them too
>Then, oh god, then my lower back starts to burn
>It moves down slowly
>Gets inside my butthole
>All the while I am practically running back to the truck, which was several miles away from where this started
>By the time I get there, my entire body below my head feels like it is on fire
>Figure I must be covered in some sort of microscopic mite, so I strip my clothes off
>Hiding behind the truck since we are with a couple local kids who were helping us out
>Also with a new field tech, and this was her first full day in-country
>She and another tech are down to their underwear since they were experiencing it too, but I was buck fucking naked
>Douse myself in bug spray
>Burning intensifies, but it feels like the cleansing fire of God scorching the Earth of sinners
>One of the most pleasurable feelings I've ever experienced
>I had to ride home naked in the back of the truck while trying to not to shit myself for unrelated lower GI shit I was dealing with from bad food

My understanding is that is basically what chiggers are. Fuck em.
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>>2088974
Nah man that's days worth of free food
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>>2094715
If you squint it looks like the gator is chilling in a hot tub
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>>2089206
Have plenty up here in maine.
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>>2088879
I’ve always been afraid to be skinny dipping and have one of these bad bois mistake my massive shlong for a nice tasty bite to eat. Chomp
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>>2089205
Yeah, fuck that. This gif captures my fear for ocean water perfectly
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>>2089205
sharks are actually pretty cool, its just movies like jaws and things like shark week that make everyone scared of sharks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqykkfT8NlM&t=151s
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>>2088879
What kind of turtles have a mouth that looks like a spout? Saw some on the trail one time next to a reservoir. Looked really funny, sometimes they would shoot water out of their mouth
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>>2098649
soft shelled?
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>>2098731
Oh shoot, that's them! Haha, thanks Anon
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>>2089205
*bonk*
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>>2098735
you bet

I picked one up out of a stream once. Fucker hissed and scratched the shit out of my arm. I was holding it in the middle of the shell, so I didn't think its legs could get me. I was wrong.
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>>2089244
>alaska

Well, moose forage for plants in up to 20ft of water and Orca eat moose that they run across. If I was in Alaska, I'd be fucking wary of the ocean too.
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>>2089206
plenty snappers in the cedar swamps in Michigan too.
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I can't stand fucking beavers. our property is near a major river and several different streams connect on it and form a swamp that is SUPPOSED to drain out into the river. But I guess some fucking protected beaver colony near my place somewhere keeps pumping out new young every year and kicking them out of the nest, so they make their way to MY swamp EVERY YEAR and dam the culvert under the road, my personal culverts on my property, EVERYWHERE. When the water lines too high its a problem with mosquitoes, road washout, you name it.. My dogs got into a fight with some a few years back and they put puncture wounds on them 1.5" deep. FUCK BEAVERS. the county guys have come to blow their shit up and they just come back and build it again. So we had enough, and every time they come back me and my father drop everything we're doing that week and fucking hunt the ones on our property with extreme fucking prejudice. I don't give a fuck if they're protected, they're fucking dead
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>>2098804
I chuckled thanks
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>>2098804
heavily based. Could you scout out the location of their nest, and fix it at night? I don't know how rural you are if you need to do it at night or not
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>>2089198
Once found a tick biting the head of my penis. Not as bad as you'd think though.
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>>2089205
I'm never gonna watch that webm, my heart rate went up just looking at that thumbnail
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>>2098804
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>>2098804
Imagine living in nature and getting angry at wildlife for being wildlife.
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>>2098829
We've tried to settle this peacefully, we don't WANT to get fucked by the game warden but if you tear it down they just leave before you get there and rebuild it when you leave. they have to die.
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>>2098896
Why would you get fucked by the Game Warden for something that nobody saw and you weren't even around for, Anon? I'm pretty sure you were in Sausalito that day
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>>2098859
Look man, do you own any land? I'm sure if you did you would understand why I'm angry.
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>>2098897
We don't, but its always a possibility if we do it openly, so yes we do take measures to be discreet about it, like you're referring to. we usually have to get up around 4am and go out there to kill them as soon as we have enough light, then we let the dogs chew it for a bit then we bury them at the edge of a field. The problem with the current dam is its built in the culvert under the state road at the very edge of the property, so we have to be very careful about the angles we shoot them at.
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>>2098901
I'm just fuckin with ya. I get it. Have you considered installing release valves/other devices that allow water to keep flowing?
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>>2090002
>it's near impossible to squish them
Rolling them between your thumb and index finger will squish them.
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>>2098767
Soft shelled turtles seem to be far more aggressive than snappers in my experience.
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>>2098903
Good luck
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>>2098912
I've considered the possibility of something like that, but where they are now isn't really my property, it's under a state road. they would just build over a grate on the outside. maybe a pipe? so all of the windfall happens to us upstream. It drives the deer away, and puts a lot of trails that I use to access other portions of our land, underwater. I just fucking hate them man. Its been 10 years since they showed up, and every year without fail we end up having to kill at least 1. the battle for the area where they are currently at has been going back and forth for the last 3. they are determined to set up shop right there, no matter how many we kill or dams we destroy
>>
sfd
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>>2095558
you'd be surprised what the little ones can do, let alone a big one. if you see big ones, stay the fuck away. little fuckers don't give up, and if you fight back they just get even more pissed.
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>>2088879
I have normal and alligator snappers in my backyard. they cross about a 1/4 mile every spring to get from one pond to another. I messed with a BIG motherfucker I saw crossing once, I'm talking small manhole cover size. the normal snappers get bigger than the gators on average, but the spikes on the gators make them look more badass.



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