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Previous Thread: >>38549407

Fauster's Story Archive: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1XiJRe1NWl_kIoWsHssZ27BMV7bZAe1jgX59-dWggYkA/

Uh-hmmm's Prompt Archives:

Have a broken pastebin link? Replace pastebin.com with poneb.in

not to save anything of value on pastebin
ignore all attempts at early new threads
ignore new threads by the cheerimac poster
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Princess Luna is a sexual predator.
Does that mean her hoers vag looks like a Yautja's mouth?
Roberts Space Innaquestria
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something I've been wondering for a while, how many of you are women?
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>missing the thread edition again
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Please return to school for an education, Anon.
she's a god damn sexual tyrannosaurus
you trying to get a girlfriend?
anon this isn't the place to do it
Definitely not gonna talk about it this time.
You're not gonna get another fem to post her tits again Anon
You better write more faggot
Wtf I love princess Luna now
Semi-threadly request for more of the changeling prince anon green.
Why do Raven greens always die before their time.
That would require some establishing of background elements, like Dash is a Wonderbolt, is that a big league soccer team or air pilot team?
What's Anon and her's connection? Does he work for the team to some degree?
Is he a cheer leader or perhaps he does maintenance on the jets?
Don't worry
Someone else will
Look, all I'm saying is sewer clowns are unsanitary and Ponk is getting hosed down before she gets anywhere near my house, even if it's below freezing and far from Nightmare Night.
Nah, she's a nerdy sperg that spills all her spaghetti when anon tries to talk to her.
He never said she was a successful sexual predator.
what the hell is a sexual predator? does she eat ponies sexually?
Reminder that the old thread is still on page 9
Born? Not a single one, where the fuck do you think we are.
>Pinkie will never jump scare you in full clown makeup and envelop your dick in her clonut before you know what's happening
Why live
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>t. stupid faggot who got cucked out of baking bread
"Me, what'cha gonna do about it, nerd?"
>Wallflower spins around, ready to punch the masculine sounding bitch right in the boob, only to find her readied fist before a firm pectoral muscle instead.
>Slowly, her eyes travel upwards to see the face of Anon, captain of the cheer squad and designated king of the boys of Canterlot High.
"So, what about it? You gonna take a swing, Smelly?"
>"I-I-I'm going t-to, u-um, g-going to just go now."
>She goes to turn away, but a firm hand grabs her shoulder and pushes her into the lockers.
>Then he's standing in front of her once more, leaning in with palms flat against the cool metal on either side of her head as she starts to sweat profusely.
>"N-now, listen here, guy, I don't believe in hitting men, but if you-"
"You're not gonna do anything, because you're a wimp," Anon cuts off, leaning closer as she tries to push herself back into the lockers. "You're what the girls call a beta. Even a guy like me can push you around and you won't, or can't do a thing about it."
>She feels tears prick the corners of her eyes as she looks away.
>"What is this? Am I going to be doing your homework from now on, too? I'm already booked up with a quarter of the soccer team."
>He frowns, grabbing her chin and roughly jerking her head to look at him.
"Nah, I don't want my grades to fall. All I want from you is this-"
>Then his lips are on hers and her entire body goes rigid.
>Her slack jaw from surprise makes it easy for the fit, towering young man to slip his tongue into her mouth, practically licking her tonsils as he completely dominates her.
>As he does this, his hands slip under her sweater, fondling her chest roughly before maneuvering behind her back.
>Her fizzled mind can barely make out what he's doing, her eyes fluttering and thoughts fogging as she's forgotten to breath since he's locked lips with her.
>Then he pulls away, and her body jerks as he roughly yanks her bra out from under her sweater, and a distant part of her mind wonders how me he managed to get it off of her.
>Guess he really is talented.
"I'm keeping this," he states, slinging the back-pack from his shoulder and unzipping it.
>Before he puts the plain, white bra away, however, he takes a long sniff of it.
"Hm, guess I don't need to imagine anymore," he says before putting it inside. "Tomorrow, after school, you're coming home with me."
"Because I haven't unloaded into a girl in way too long and I'm going to pump you full," he answers, then pauses. "Unless you mean why I chose you, in which case, I need to keep up my reputation as the pure, unobtainable king of the school, but I've got a libido that makes that hard. So I need a girl no one will pay attention to when I leave her walking funny, who doesn't have friends to tell they scored with me, and who no one will believe if she tries to brag about it. Congratulations, you're going to be my incognito cum dump from now on."

Something something RGRE
didn't even get hard ironically
This is kinda cringy ngl
This makes me remember that one wallflower blush green with ice king anon. Was it ever completed?
-1/10, whatever the opposite of an erection is I've got it.
Cute and wholesome!
don't think so
>and then everypony clapped
my nigga all of the stories are in the archive and literally ctrl+f searchable
I liked it
So what you fucks up to today?
partaking in some delusions and lifting weights, as god intended
Getting way too into satisfactory and halfheartedly trying to make sense of this week's dumb fandom drama.
I want to date the single mothers of the foals I've been babysitting.
Many thanks
We all do, Anon.
Attempting to fight my own laziness and winning around 10% of the time
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Who's ready for a totally fresh idea?
Definitely didn't accidentally post as its own thread.
Definitely didn't get embarassed and ran off for a bit while collecting my spaghetti.
Unrelated to that, fuck CAPTCHAs, they're cancer.

>>Be Fluttershy, Pre-EqG.
>>Have no friends because you're the 'weird quiet kid' in your class.
>>Start making 'friends' out of the blue.
>>These 'friendships' generally end after a week or two.
>>Usually, with a sleepover that happens to coincide with your brother being home from college.
>>They stop hanging out with you after those, for some reason.

>>Be Fluttershy, Post-EqG.
>>Have a realization about those 'friends' of yours from back when.
>>Zephyr gets real quiet when you mention them.
>>Won't even make eye contact.
>>Starts blushing.
>>Who is kind of ugly.
>>Who is very desparate.
>>Who you've learned is a bit of a whore.

Anyone else know a weird quiet kid that people only really hung out with because his sister was a total slut and would put out at the drop of a hat?
He was a bit too weird for his STI ridden sister to be worth it, but hey.
Based, would read more
>you pissed me off. Your virginity is now forfeit.
>tfw mare on one side, tits on the other
>Truly, there is only peace
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>a mare, her barbie, and her b&thro counterparts team up to get that hot monkey dick from (You)
how do you resist the trifecta?
could be interesting depending on how is done
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My waifu(Dapi) is first in all things, if she wants to try herding (with her counterparts or other mares) then I'll be hesitant but go for it.
If she wants to be mono though then I'll happily do that.
Pretty much the only herd situation i'd be enthusiastic for straight off the bat would be with Twiggle though.
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I don't.
You are anon and since going to equestria you somehow got magic. What’s more is that you invented serval schools of magic that no race has thought of before.
What happens are these seen as viable things to learn or are you shot down because your gender also how do the mane 6 react.
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Cursing this pathetic meat sack I have to ambulate around in. My head has been throbbing for hours
Fuck woman, marry mare, kill banthro
They ask me to stop eating glue and they sign me up for a remedial learning course.
fucking kill yourself
>ignore 3dpd cunt and b&thro
>make mare cum with hot monkey dick as they watch, cucked
>leave to real Equestria with mare waifu, never looking back at the two meaningless abominations
>maybe kill them both if mare is cool with it and there's an easy method around, like flamethrower
Is twilight pissed that you know more about certain parts of magic than her, and does she feel very uncomfortable asking to learn from you.
God I hate "Hey how react" posts
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thats right bitch ill nut in your waifu next
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I think Pinkie would be a really good mom
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the correct choice was to fuck the anthro desu
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Good to see we've been dying since 2014.
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Twilight asks the teachers if any paste has gone missing, and asks anon how his classes are going
The only correct answer
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Why resist?
Gimme all that flutterbutterbutt.
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I wouldn't even put up token resistance.
Reproducing with an anthro pony is actually how EQG humans are produced.
The two Pinkies switch places often, do you think both love boobs, or only one, and which one?
You know when guys tell girls who are streaming, "It's impossible to touch your elbows together by your belly button," so they'll get confused, try it during the stream, and press their boobs together to show off cleavage?
Yeah, what would be the male equivalent to that in RGR?
probably like, if you pull your boxers up really tight it makes your balls undetectable or something stupid like that
I bet he was also the same guy who said that he didn't think g4 would get much porn.
>All the women are dudes
>All the girls are federal agents

Welcome to the internet, Anon
This makes my jingles jangle
Blast from the past that is.
I'll have to read through it to get my bearings, but maybe I can do another post of it tonight.
But why that garbage site?
Replace "pastebin.com" in the URL with "poneb.in" for a clutter free reading experience.
because thats what the link is indexed with, i already know about ponebin, im not a retard
Well, I did not know about that and it's made writing the next part easier.
I'm going to get at least one post written tonight, but I'm aiming for two.
Just need my energy to hold out for a little while longer...
Sorry didn't mean to imply you're stupid.
But wouldn't it be easier to just replace all mentions of "pastebin.com" with "poneb.in" so people wouldn't need to do it themself when copying links and such?
dude, not only do i not particularly care, but the link itself works just fine as it is
>But no, she showed up, and if anything, she worked even harder than the day before as they focused on her lower body and core.
>Anon could tell that something had been on her mind as there was a frown and fierce look on her face while she performed many of the exercises, but after asking her once if everything was alright, and she gave a curt answer of, "Yeah, I'm fine," he decided not to press.
>His friends getting too pushy for answers, as if entitled to every detail of his life, has been incredibly annoying, and he's not about to start prying into another's business the same way.
>Besides, he knows what it's like to be agitated and to use exercise as an outlet for the feeling, so he can relate.
>As he does some pre-workout stretches, he watches the doors, and upon seeing Wallflower step through the entrance, a small smile pulls at his lips unnoticed.
>As soon as she spots him, she smiles herself and walks towards him with as much speed as her noticeably sore legs will allow.
>"Hey, Anon," she starts, "Ready to lift some iron?"
>He chuckles as he looks up at her, still seated on the floor and touching his toes.
"I think you mean pump some iron," he corrects, getting her to blush in embarrassment. "And no, we aren't doing that today. We'll be doing cardio and calisthenics. It's a good way to let the muscles recover and repair themselves without taking the day off."
>She blinks, "Oh, so like a rest day?"
"Yes and no," he answers simply as he waves her to join him on the floor. "I don't believe in rest days where you don't do anything, hence why we're doing comparatively light workout today. Starting with plenty of extra stretches."
>He'd gone over the basic pre and post workout stretches the last couple of days, but now he shows her some more advanced ones.
>She grunts as he guides her body through the cat and cow exercise, commenting, "I feel more like a cat trying to hack up a furball."
>Anon smirks at that as he gently presses his fingers to her abdomen and pushing up, silently indicating for her to arch her back more upwards.
"Yeah, it's kind of weird, but it's a great warmup- try to dip down more, and make sure your moving your head back as much as you can- and it's also good for the spine."
>She does what he says and extends her range of motion as much as she can.
>"Really? You think this will help my neck pain?"
"It won't hurt. A lot of neck and back pain is caused by the muscles not being strong enough to support everything properly. Strengthening your neck muscles should help with any pain. I noticed you slouch some too. If you really are having pain, then working on your posture is important. Once we're done with the warmup, I'll give you some pointers for posture, but for now, lets move onto the next exercise."
>"What's this one going to be? Dog and Chicken."
"Donkey kicks, actually, smartass. Now come on, do what I do. You can stay in the same position, but we'll be raising our legs one at a time like this."
I'm starting to think >>38584216 is on to something
I meant it more like does society try and discredit you or your discovery.
Like if I discover flesh crafting/ biomancy.
You have every right to
It lives? Oh fuck yes.
>Wallflower doesn't argue and does as she's told, though she does have a good laugh when they get to what he calls the bird-dog crunch.
>"I thought you said we weren't doing the dog and chicken?"
"Just do the exercises," Anon grumbles as he walks her through the motions.
>"Hey, this stuff seems familiar," Wallflower notes as she starts doing runner's lunges from the down dog position he showed her. "Is this yoga?"
Anon sighs, but answers, "Caught that, huh? I know, I thought it was just hippy-dippy garbage, too, but my dad is really into it, and he wanted me to start going through his morning routine with him a few years back. Once I started, though, I noticed a lot of benefits, so now I incorporate it into my regualr routine."
>He side-eyes her with a frown.
"You've got any smart aleck comments you want to get out of your system, or can we continue with our exercises?"
>Her eyes go wide, then she shakes her head.
>"Oh no, I don't think it's weird. I mean, honestly, a guy doing yoga is probably the most guy thing I think I've seen you get into. Er, no offense."
"Some taken, but I get it," he answers. "Luckily we're done with the stretches for now, so we can move onto the next exercise."
>"Whatever it is, I think I'm ready for it," Wallflower says confidently, "I think I'm getting the hang of this workout stuff."
"Good, because we're doing two miles on the treadmills."
>"... M-miles?"
>Anon cracks a smile at that and stands, grabbing Wallflower and halling her to her feet in the process.
"Don't worry, it's not as bad as it sounds."
>"How does running two miles ever sound not bad for anyone who isn't a masochist or a marathon runner?" she asks skeptically, causing Anon to laugh.
"I'm pretty sure those people are one and the same, but don't worry, we won't be running the whole two miles. We're going to start out at a brisk walk and slowly work our way up to a jog, then reduce speed gradually for the last stretch. We're also going to be running at an incline to reduce the impact on our joints. Running's good exercise, but it can really wear on the knees and hips."
>She doesn't look wholly convinced, but nods slowly.
>"I guess that sounds reasonable. I mean, if people can run marathons, a couple miles should be easy, right?"

>Wallflower practically collapses once she's off of the treadmill, panting and sweating as she leans on the railing of the machine as if it were a lifeline.
>She sees Anon's feet come into view, but doesn't have the energy to stand up straight and look him in the eye.
>At least, she didn't think she did until his hand starts rubbing at the base of her neck and she jolts up.
>She thought she was imagining it, but no, his palm is still between her shoulder blades, halting a moment before continuing to rub in small circles.
"You okay?" he asks as she stares at him, suddenly appreciating that all the sweat and redness in her face can easily be attributed to the workout. "I know running's tough if you aren't used to it."
While not shitposts they are shit posts, >>38587261 is right
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I-I wan't to be predated on
Getting them to do the Mr. Olympia poses
Ending is so cute. Thanks.
>it's back
>"Careful up there y'hear?"
>You smirk.
"C'mon Applejack, careful is like my middle na- uh oh WHOA WHOA!"
>You start to fall back and as high up as you are in this tree, that's bad news if you fall.
>"A-ANON! Hold on just!" You catch Applejack scrambling to think of how to catch you.
>Fortunately your other hand is firmly grasping the trunk of the tree so all you do is slowly and exagerratedly lean backwards until you are faving Applejack upside down.
"Oh no~ Applejack, you were right, I should've been careful like you said!" you playfully call back.
>You snicker as her face drops, "Haw haw, real funny making me think you could've snapped your neck like that. You should write that bit down and share it with pinkie" she grumbles as she fixes her hat.
"I think the puchline only lands after the straightman- uh mare has asked me to be careful no less than 15 times. Today," you respond, sitting back upright and looking down at Applejack, " Especially after we've been over this before…"
>Applejack tips her hat a little lower to cover her face some while she replies, "W-well…" she sighs, "yeah alright, I'm sorry Anonymous."
>You tighten your satchel of picked apples over your shoulder and switly make your way down the tree to stand in front of the waist high orange mare.
"Forgiven." you respond gently as you tip her hat back up.
>Applejack scrunches her nose in surprise, "I-I just worry and-"
"Aaaaand" you cut her off, knowing what she's going to say after the last several times you've had this exact talk.
>She sighs, "And I should just trust you to ask for help if you need it. I remember."
>You smile at her and tuck some of her dishevelled mane back behind her ear, since you were the cause of it getting dishevelled like that.
"I know you mean well AJ, and I do appreciate your concern, I just-"
>She cuts you off this time, "don't want to hear my gum flapping about it 20 times over, I know." she gives you a meek smile back after you fix her mane.
>You nod and fish out two of your best picks from the tree you were just in.
"Take a look at these beauties I got while I was up there."
>She lets out a low whistle as you hold them up for her to look over, "beauts they are, Anon, how many bags have you filled already?"
>You do a quick jog of your memory for today.
"Uh, about 4. This makes 5."
>Applejack looks up at the position of the sun, "Good pace, that's enough to take to market. Uh, I reckon?"
>You were about to remind her that the hand-picked apples were your business so it's your call when to go to market but she seems to have caught herself before you did.
"Yeah, I reckon. Room for my haul in Mac's wagon?"
>She thinks on it for a moment, "Should be, we're bringing out orchard B today."
>You start heading back to the barn.
"Perfect, I'll start loading up."
>You whistle a jaunty tune as you get to work.
>Applejack really has come pretty far along over the year since you got to equestria.
>She used to nag and nag you with her "worry," but not a word when Applebloom was off making a rocket or entering the everfree woods.
>She also disagreed with your idea about hand-picked apples until she saw how much of a difference there was from a prime kicked apple compared to a prime picked apple.
>Then once she came around to the idea and worked with you on making it into a buisness of its own, which let you pay for your little shack on the farm and have some money to set aside, she took a couple more months to ease off her "guidance".
>You picked up pretty quick that things are different in Equestria, more so than the tiny furniture and having to duck under every door.
>The guys here are treated very gently and while that's nice, it can get grating too when you're just trying to live your new life.
>Who would've thought drinking Pepsi from a Coke glass during a lightning storm would lead to this?
>You grunt as you heft the last satchel into the back of the wagon.
"Not all bad though…" you muse aloud as you look over how thick your forearms have gotten.
>You slimmed down and tightened up a lot in your time here, natural result of having to walk everyhwere and no fast food that you can actually eat because it all has hay.
"That's the last of it for me, you need any help with things, Mac?"
>Big Mac finishes his once-around the wagon and looks to you, his head nearly shoulder height with you, "Nnnnope."
>He slips into the harness and with a light grunt starts pulling the wagon towards the town square market.
>You have a pleasant chat with Big Mac on the path down, ongoings with the farm, something wacky that Granny Smith said, Applebloom and her friend's latest shenanigans.
>Things get quiet for a bit and you wave at other passersby making their way into or out of town.
>"'Non?" Big Mac nudges your side with his shoulder and you turn to look at him.
>He dances around his question for a bit, dragging it out so long that you almost didn't understand what he was asking but you finally click on what he wants to know, "Are you interested in anyone?"
>You have debated the idea before, usually at night when you go home to an empty bed.
"What's bringing this up all of a sudden? You got someone in mind for me?" you goad, nudging him back.
>Mac blushes, its subtle but noticable once you know how to spot it, "Nnnnope?" he says.
>He's definitely flustered but you're not sure if it's becasue he's does have someone in mind or if it's because he's got some other angle to this question.
"Well, it's not like I haven't thought about it. I mean, I've been here almost a year and I'll admit that I do feel a little lonely sometimes-"
>Mac's ears droop a little in response.
"But I don't know… I'm not sure if I'm lonely for company or if I'm lonely for human company, y'know?"
"Oh, right. Well, I guess that's kind of what I'm getting at? Like, I miss memes and nobody even knows that that means, except maybe Pinkie and it's not quite the same. Twilight tries to, we have our weekly sessions where I go over things I remember but that's not really bonding over a shared experience as much as it is Humans 101."
>Big Mac looks down a little as you both walk.
"Sorry, I got away from the question a bit didn't I?" You slip an arm around his shoulder and pat him reassuringly.
>Mac nuzzles into you and for a time you both walk together in silence.
"You might be onto something though, Mac. I've got all these doubts about things in my head but what have I done with them?"
"Right, nothing! What good does it do me not to at least test the hyphothesis as Twilight would put it?
>You reach up and give his right ear a scratch, his favorite spot.
"Boy, Mac, you know just the thing to say. I'm feeling pretty fired up!"
>Mac giggles while you play with his ear, "Yyyup!"
>You and Mac get to market and have a pretty good system for setting up the stands quickly.
>At this point you can do it on autopilot so you drift back to the thought of interest in someone.
>It's a stange concept to adopt now that you're seriously giving it thought.
>They're all so bright and colorful and… small, relatively speaking.
>Obviously the adults are adults. Rarity for example can just go on and on about the "trails and tribulations of an emipre minded mare" as she puts it.
>But is that all that you would need? Someone to have grown up conversations with?
>You glance around, wathcing the local sellers at work, getting thigns set up.
>Cherry Berry is setting up her sign up sheet for baloon rides, the flower sisters are setting up their displays next to her.
>Both groups catch your eyes and sheepishly smile and wave.
>You wave back and let your gaze wander through the other stands and passersby.
>What makes a pony attractive? To you, they're all cute in the same kind of way but is there something that makes a pony hot or ugly? What if you eventually figure out how to judge? Would that matter to you?
>Of course the reverse also stands too, what would a potential partner think of you?
>Fluttershy mentioned before that your dietary needs might be better suited among gryphons but they're a little rougher to live among given that you can't fly.
>So maybe you should even consider gryphons or minotaurs? You've seen them around too.
>You're starting to remember why you've been hung up on the idea for so long now that the high of your conversation with Mac is wearing down.
"Okay, I'm ready. You?"
>You sit down in your custom made stool beside Big Mac and put on your winningest smile as the market is approaching peak time.
"Say Mac?"
"About what you asked me earlier?"
"Did you actually have someo- somepony in mind for me?"
>Mac scrunches his muzzle slightly.
"It's okay if you didn't, I've been thinking about it on the way down but I figured if you did have a suggestion then maybe I should trust your gut on this, couldn't hurt right?"
>You squint as the sunshine beams down over your stand.
"Wow, it's real bright out today huh?" you add as you bring your hand up to your brow to shade your eyes a little.
>"Yyup" Mac replies, doing the same with a hoof.
"Wait, what is that a response to? You do have somepony in mind or that it's extra bright out?"
>Mac begins to speak but the sunlight overhead seems to hit an intensity, to the point that everything is blinding for a moment.
>Followed by a massive explosion.
>The sound is deafening, debris and water from the impacted fountain are flung everywhere.
>Mac nearly tackles you and you have to use all your strength to push him back and turn so you are shouldering the impacts.
>There are screams and shrieks under the loud ringing in your ears.
>You manage to see through the haze of dust enough to make out a figure that's not outright panicing.
>It's lanky and tall, relatiavely speaking.

>Oh god.
>You died.
>Of course you died.
>Go for a jog, they said.
>It's good for your health, they said.
>Hey we're doing construction here what are you doing?! They said.
>You went for a jog, slipped down a manhole and broke your neck in the sewers.
>At least you wore your sexy leggings so you're going to be a hot laughingstock when you wind up in the papers.
>Boy It's a good thing that you can't feel pain in the after-
"OWWWW" you cry as you instinctively attempt to suck in air only for a dagger of pain to strike you right inbetween the ribs.
>Now that the dull thrum of the impact is passing you are becoming more aware of the damp ground you can feel under your cheek.
"Oh no… I didn't die and now I'm in the sewers! BLEH!"
>You whine and sob as you lift yourself to your knees, spitting as much of the foul wetness that made its way into your mouth.
>Your vision comes into focus little by little, to the point that you can see your hands and a dank fog around you.
"Wh- what kind of- OW what is this?"
>You hiss with pain as you struggle to stand up.
>This… isn't a sewer.
>Probably, it's not like you've been in one before but you wouldn't expect it to look so… what's that puple light?
>You hear loud noises coming in the direction of the purple light beyond the haze, it's animalistic but not like anything you've ever heard before.
>It's like if a fox was singing opera, but also very pissed off.
>The light intensifies and you hear a deep voice shout, "WAIT WAIT STOP!"
"H-Hello?! OW!" you try to call out but are hit with another wave of pain.
>You hear the deeper voice making the same kind of animal noises for a moment followed up by english, "Hey! You! You're human right? Come out. It's okay."
>You hesitantly shuffle your way towards the voice, the plume of dust burns your eyes and each cough it draws from you is followed by a faint cry of pain.
>Soon the density of it falls away and you can make out one tall shape surrounded by many small ones.
>The tall shape moves towards you and the purple light behind it glows brighter until it's spoken back to by that deep voice again.
>In just a few steps the figure is close enough taht you can make out the figure of a panicked looking man. He stops moving towards you, his eyes are wide as he looks you over.
>"Oh… you're really hurt. Shit. Uh…"
>He frantically pats himself before muttering, "Right, bandaids aren't a thing. Uh, okay. Hey you uh?"
"Femanon. My uh- ow, name."
>"Okay, Femanon." He pats his chest, "Anonymous. Uh sorry I'm not tring to be weird just, this is a lot. For me and its about to be a lot for you too."
>A jolt of pain shoots up your spine which makes your footing give out and you yelp with pain.
>Anonymous darts forward and brings you close to keep you from falling.
>There's a bright purple flash and in an instant you are slumped over in a room that is ridiculously shiny.
>It's like everything is made of crystal.
>And surroudning the two of you are six little… ponies?
>Anonymous holds out a hand to them and belts out those same animal noises.
>That seems to get them all to settle back a little.
>"You okay? Think you can stand a little?"
"Think so, I don't think I broke anything. Aside from my brain maybe."
>He chuckles, "Trust me, you didn't break your brain." he lets you go gently but keeps you supported by your shoulders in his outstretched arms.
>He gestures to the room and the creatures behind him with his head.
>"Welcome to Equestria."

That's all for now, thought this was an underused concept to have both Anon and Femanon in RGRE, hopefully you all think so too
Decent start and interesting dynamic with the apples but i pretty much lost all interest the moment fem-anon was introduced.
I'm intrigued and I like how cute you write Big Mac.
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Femanon in rgre depends very heavily on execution, but I'm liking what you have so far! Seems promising. I'm looking forward to more!
Female protagonists are almost always, universally cringe.

I'm intrigued...
that's part of the fun imo
>he thinks his opinion matters
It'll be interesting to see where you take this.
Likewise. It's nice to see stallions portrayed as not a 2D bitch. Doesn't happen often.
gonna boop a foal and the maretriarchy will protect me from jailtime
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"Okay so just sit still and the potion should start kicking in pretty soon."
>Femanon looks uneasy seated in front of you, she's hugging her ribs with one arm.
>"Oh!" you hear her exclaim softly and she timidly brings her arm back to rest by her side, "Hey you're right!"
>You breathe a sigh of relief, Zecora wasn't sure if this would actually work but since Femanon hasn't had the translation spell put on her yet she didn't understand that conversation.
>"Wait… is my foot supposed to tingle?"
"Yeah actually, weird side effect. That'll go away in a couple hours- wait, left or right foot?"
>Shit, it's your left foot whenever you drink the potion. Is that bad?
>Femanon's eyes start to narrow as she reads your face.
>You sheepishly smile back, "yeah uh it's my right one too, just making sure."
>She motions wiping her brow and smiles up at you, "So… Equestria huh?"
"Yeah! It's nice!" you respond in a knee jerk fashion.
>She looks at you expectantly.
"Uh… there's magic! We can't use it though, least as far as we were able to test, b-but it does work on us like with the healing potion and the language spell that'll let you speak equestrian."
>"Hold on, you did magic tests?! Like-" she holds her hands out and does a swooshing motion with one hand, "levioh suhh"?
>You snicker.
"I wish, instead of a sorting hat, Twilight used something that was kind of like a colander with lightbulbs on it but I couldn't get a single one to blink."
>"And which one is Twilight again?"
"She's the uh… I don't know how to translate it. She's the purple one."
>"Oh the pegacorn?"
"Mmmm… I mean technically right, but it just sounds wrong in english. I don't know how to describe it."
>Femanon tilts her head.
"Sorry, I'm not trying to be difficult about this, I just I think you'll get what I mean once Twilight has the spell ready and I'm really out of practice talking to a person again- Human! I mean talking to another human. Obviously the ponies and gryphons and everything else are people just-"
>Femanon giggles, "Hey, relax. You've been here for almost a year right? I'll take your word for pretty magic horse things."
>You can feel the heat radiating on your cheeks.
"Right. Sorry again."
>"So, there's no way back?" Femanon asks, choosing to move past your spergyness
>You shake your head.
"They tried. Twilight, Celestia, Luna- uh they're other… pegacorns, but they're bigger than Twilight is."
>Femanon shrugs, "Sure, why not? So they tried-" she repeats to continue your train of thought.
"Yeah, but uh there's nothing they can do. Apparently there's a mirror that takes you to a place that's like ours but it's not ours and they weren't sure what would happen to me if I went through after what it did to Spike."
"He's a dragon, a baby one."
>"There's DRAGONS?!"
"Oh yeah, there's dragons too. I've only met Spike, he's little, but there's bigger ones. I've been told anyway."
>"How big? LIke chungus big?"
"Nah- oh actually I think I saw a picture and there was a real chungus looking motherf- wait, you know Big Chungus?"
>Femanon rolls her eyes, "I do internet y'know or, I guess I did up until today." She looks down a bit.
"Hey hey, it's not so bad. I mean it is, but I dunno. You get used to it?"
>You hear a faint sniffle.
>Oh no.
>Femanon sniffles more, her eyes start to water up.
"Aw shit…" you can feel yourself tear up as well as you are hit with the fresh memory of your own first arrival.
>Femanon goes limp and falls into your chest.
>You take her into your arms and start to gently weep on top of her head while she weeps into your chest.
>The two of you wallow in your shared misery together, and for the first time in a long time you feel like someone can finally understand how you feel.

>"Was that shouting? Fluttershy what are they saying? C'mon c'mon, MAMA NEEDS HER HOT GOSS!"
>Fluttershy struggles to push Pinkie off of her, "I-I told you I don't know exactly what they're saying and I'm s-sorry, but I can't even hear what little I can understand when you're on top of me."
>Rainbow Dash snickers, "Fluttershy's not a bottom confirmed?"
"Girls…" you groan, getting the three of them to quickly get back into the huddle.
>"Sorry Twilight" Pinkie and Dash respond in unison while Fluttershy merely squeaks softly in reply.
"Okay, so far observations seem to be going well. They seem like they're getting along-"
>"Darling, how could they not? The last of their kind ripped from everything they're ever known only to have each other in this crazy world! This goss is SO HOT!"
>"Alright why not take about 20% off here there Rarity, this isn't like one of your colty books, this is serious."
>"My novellas are award winning I'll have you know for one-" Rarity starts encroaching closer and closer to get face to face with a grimacing Applejack, "and for two you've been quite grouchy as soon as you saw Anon get close to her so maybe the mare doth protest too-"
>"SO. MUCH. GOSS!" Pinkie shouts as she wedges her face in between the two of them just as they were about to butt heads.
"GIRLS" you snap, getting them all to fall in line again.
>You sigh.
"Look, Applejack is right. This IS serious."
"There's a lot of unknowns we're dealing with, like what if there's more of them coming through? We thought we couldn't send Anonymous back but maybe we missed something? What if these two aren't from the same place, there's a human world we couldn't send Anon to because it wasn't his."
>"Yeah and what if they wind up hating each other?" Applejack adds on.
>"Oh uhm… I don't think we need to worry about that, sorry, but uhm look" Fluttershy pipes up with, nodding to the glass window.
>You all look in the direction of the two humans to see them huddled together, crying.
>"That's the most precious thing I've ever seen" Rarity chokes out between reserved tears.
>You sigh.
"Well… that's one unknown sorted for now. They do get along."
>"For now" Applejack adds.
"For now, yes. We do have to consider that could change as well. Anonymous said that humans can flip on a dime and when they don't get along, it's uh… not pretty."
"BUT-" you add after seeing Applejack's jaw clench, "Anonymous should be the stronger one between the two-"
>"Hot" Rainbow Dash mutters under her breath to Fluttershy who blushes while Applejack rolls her eyes.
"And that means if they were to turn on each other Anonymous should be able to get to any of us for help so we can effectively consider that matter settled."
>You stare each of them down until they nod in agreement.
>Honestly, it's like herding cats sometimes.
"So, for now we do this just like we did before. We get her able to communicate, she can stay with me in the castle for now while we figure out more long term plans and take things one day at a time."
>You nod, trying to psych yourself up for this.
>One thing at a time Twilight, that's how you work through a list.
"Remember, Anonymous is our friend and I think this new human will be too. We just need to be patient and we need to be open. This is going to be a process for all of us, but that's what we do right?"
>They all nod in agreement, some more begrudging than others and some more eager than others too.
>One thing at a time Twilight…
>You open the doors to the sound of airy breaths coming from the both of them.

"I swear to you. Coke glass, pepsi soda, lightning storm."
>Femanon rolls her eyes, still puffy and red, "Lucky! I'm so sure I broke a rib in that fall."
"Oh it wasn't pretty for me either. My hair was on fire when I got here."
>Femanon hisses as she meets your gaze.
>You both break out into laughter just as the doors open and Twilight and the others start walking in.
"Oh, hey! Uh, is the spell ready now?"
>"Ready? OH. YES! Yes, the spell is ready."
>You nod and turn to Fem.
"Okay, time to get the official welcome."
>Femanon takes your hand briefly, you give her a reassuring squeeze before letting go and taking a step back.
>Twilight's horn begins to shimmer and there's a faint violet aura around Femanon's neck.
>You blink at the bright flash of purple light and once it's done Fem is still sitting where she was.
>Everyone looks pensively at her as she looks timidly between everyone.
>"Uh, h-hello. It's nice to meet you all, my name is Femanon."
>You breathe a sigh of relief once she speaks in fluent equestrian.
>"Hi Femanon! The name's Pinkamena DIane Pie, but you can call me Pinkie PIe, or Pinkie, or Pringle, or Penka, or whatever you want really. Just don't call me PP becuase that always makes Anon laugh."
>You snicker and immediately try to stop once Pinkie calls attention to you.
>Goddamn it.
>"See?" she says turning back to an also giggling Femanon.
>"Put 'er there!" Pinkie says holding out a hoof for Femanon to shake.
"Wait wait! FEMANON NO-"
>You blink after being blinded by the flashbang to find you are suspended in a sea of confetti.
"I got her with a pull my finger ONCE and she's made it her life's mission to up the ante each time I shake her hand."
>Femanon surfaces to the top wearing goggles and a snorkel.
>She blows into the snorkel and a party horn sounds through it along with a plume of more confetti.
>"Oh I like Pinkie Pie" She says after spitting the snorkel out and starts laughing.
>"Yes! I'm WINNING!" Pinkie cheers as she dolphin dives over the two of you and plunges back into the confetti.

That's all for now, I hope this helps narrow in what I plan to do with the story and I hope you all enjoy it.
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The more I see Ponka pulling these shenanigans, the more I feel like she belongs with Discord.
I enjoy
What happened to this thread?
Where'd everybody go?
Tyrant twilight was not brought up so everyone stopped talking.
This is precious
Inspiration well is tapped out and i'm not interested in the last green posted.
I'll come up with some random prompts.

>"Changeling male gets a job with Rarity as a fashion model."
>"Cadence and Shining would give herding a shot but no one ever asked until a drunk Celestia showed up in the empire wanting cuddles."
>"Anon is terrible at bartering and Caramel gives him shopping trips."
>"Alicorn-Prince Anon and Blueblood have some colt-to-colt cousin bonding during a hike on canterlot mountain."
>"Anon and his bee-ling waifu are both DIY nuts, but she is more competent."
weird thread is weird just like fallout equestria and i do not follow your niche sub culture here
I'll wait for you with impatience
Cringe contrarian copium.
>"I'm fine, really," she says. "My legs are just a bit shaky after that, plus working out yesterday."
"Yeah, that's why I kept it to a light jog even at our top speed."
>She arches an eyebrow.
>"That was a light jog? Maybe for you, but I've got shorter legs."
>He blinks a few times, then does something she never thought she'd see him do.
>He looks sheepish and rubs at the back of his head.
"Right, guess I didn't think of that. Sorry."
>"It's fine," she answers even as she smirks. "I'd appreciate it if you helped me find a seat, though."
>he obliges and helps her over to a bench where she immediately flops down.
>"Augh, how do you do this stuff all time?" she whines as she pulls at the front of her shirt, which had begun to stick to her skin from all the moisture. "I thought guys were supposed to hate things like sweat and pain?"
>He averts his eyes from her for some reason and coughs into his fist.
"You know the old saying, no pain, no gain. Besides, it gets easier the longer you keep up with it. By the way, do you not happen to own any sports bras?"
>She tilts her head.
>"No, but working out in my regualr one the last couple days caused the straps to chafe, so I just decided to go commando instead. Why?"
"No reason, just thinking that if you're going to take working out seriously, you might want to invest in one. As for chafing, I know some of the girls in the fitness club use cornstarch during their exercises to help with it."
>"I guess you've got a point, and I'll try that cornstarch thing next time," she answers, leaning back with her palms flat against the bench. "Phew, I need some water right now, though. I'm dying of thirst."
>She smiles as she adds, "I brought my own bottle today."
"You did? Where is it?"
>"I put in my bag so I wouldn't forget," she explains proudly, then stalls. "... The bag I left in the changing room locker without taking the bottle out..."
>While she groans at her own stupidity, Anon chuckles and hands her his own bottle.
"It's fine, just have some of mine."
>She smiles and takes it gratefully, too thirsty to care as she pops the top and takes a big swig.
>"Ah, that hits the spot," she says as she holds it back to him
>He hums in agreement and takes it back to get a drink himself.
"Surprised you didn't try to squirt it into your mouth this time," he says conversationally once he's done, "Not afraid you'll catch cooties anymore?"
>As his words register, and she realizes what she had done, it's her turn to look away and cough into her hand.
"H-hey, my legs are feeling a lot better now. What're we doing next?"
"Some pushups, jumping jacks, and leg raises," he answers, thankfully not pressing with is previous question. "Then some light cool down exercises and stretches. You think you can handle all that?"
>"I can at least try," she says uncertainly. "If I die, though, I'm haunting you."
"Eh, you already fade into the background so much while you're alive that I doubt I'll even notice you as a ghost."
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This is neat.
oh like you're doing now, faggot?
oh like you're doing now, faggot?
>>"Anon is terrible at bartering and Caramel gives him shopping trips."
I can't decide if he'd encourage Anon to flash his sack a little bit or not.
That may be a bit much. He would, however, encourage Anon to seduce mares with his masculine wiles.
Guys, this is a tech demo of sorts.

>You sit on the carpet , under the shade of gazebo, in Amira’s favorite spot in the garden.
>Amira lies alongside you, the Book is opened in front of her.
>”…That means, Her Light bound the splinters of the primordial Earth and Sky She parted away and She weighted them in her grasp and began making the rules in Her mind for them, thinking what would She will to make be.
>”All the shards were left to was to obey, and she began to collect them together and made different simple things, and different essences from these things, and those essences she was bringing together as well, mixing them and rejoicing in creation.”
>You raise your gaze upwards, to the sky, as a token of respect.
“That is how the Divine White mare had told Jalala, word for word, right, my lady?”
>Amira taks the handle to turn the different page.
>”Well, ‘told’ is one way to understand it. Jalala, peace be upon her, had said to my ancestress back then, that it was more like the Goddess touched her soul and she felt that. Through the stream of images and feelings. All of that while talking to her in words as well. The prophetess was cautious to assume, but it seemed to her that was a partially unintended side effect. She basically took a glimpse of the Goddess’… I’m not sure how to formulate… Well… Mind. And being the spark of the same Flame, as we all are, she was able to witness the innermost, what the Goddess Herself was experiencing. At least what she could understand from it, that is.”
“That is truly outstanding.”
>You say conversationally, to not just keep quiet.
>”So, the Goddess made more and more things. And if She felt it was to Her liking, it immediately would became an order of things to be so.
>”There now was two lights now in universe, Her Light and light of the stars she lit up. There now were huge rocky spheres and smaller ones as well, and rocky splinters and they danced round each other and the Goddess marveled at that dance.”
>OK, that’s becoming a bit ridiculous.
“My Lady, can I ask?”
>”Of course, that is the whole point.”
“That sounds like… ehm… suns? And… other worlds? Different worlds?”
>Amira smiles.
>”Well, what do you think those dots in the night sky are, Anon? Besides those which are stars.”
>You sit there, dumbfounded. Not by the fact that ‘dots in the sky’ are other suns and worlds, of course.
>The existence of different worlds isn’t haram! The Goddess herself told so!
>Figuratively speaking, a couple of metric tonnes of worries just lift up from your shoulders.
>You can even say you are ecstatic at this moment.
>That would give your existence a huge amount of legitimacy.
>You can’t help but smile. Wide, in a slightly stupid way.
>”I wonder what your people thought on the matter, Anon.”
>Amira comments with a chuckle, observing your reaction.
“There were, and there are, a quite a number of different schools of thought on the matter…”
>She nods.
>”I see, as usual with your kind.”
“…Some even theorized the world is flat.
>You are quick to add, remembering Ahmed’s advice.
>Amira makes a face that probably means something like “Poor, retarded foals.”
>”Anyway. The more things were made, the more She needed to shift Her gaze and a look on the universe differently than before. Instead of Everything-at-Once there now was Something.
>”For example, where She looked became forward and the forward now was where she looked. But as She looked forward there also was a rear now as well. And so on.
>”Bat alas, as it was Her will that commanded so it now was forward and back, and it was so, and it existed now, she couldn’t undone it without destroying everything that She had made to be, so the order became different.
>”Because this now was the order of the things and She willed it Herself.”
>”Sounds complicated, I would imagine.”
>Amira looks at you a couple of moments, to make sure you understood.
>Probably due to the earlier remark about your kind unfortunate theories.
>You make an thoughtful face for a half a minute, to keep the facade.
>Hmm, so there IS a limit to Goddess’ might. And that limit is Herself?
>Unfortunate implications to talk out loud about, it seems.
“Probably at first, but after some thought, my lady, it makes perfect sense.”
>Amira’s ears indicate she’s very pleased by your conclusion.
>”And in that manner the whole universe we are living in was eventually made.”
>”Things are going as they are, because She decided it should be so, and many things depend upon other things She also made to be earlier.”
>”Although, to be honest, here Jalala herself made a remark, that ‘earlier’ is a completely subjective and again a consequence of her interpretation of the mental image she got. For she truly faced something that is incomprehensible and eldritch.”
>You pat your chin, thinking. That prompts the question that is worth asking. You hope Amira wouldn’t react too strongly.
“Can I ask… well… did Jalala, peace be upon her, see what was before the universe was created? Was even anything before?”
>Amira stays silent for a minute, actually pondering on your question.
>”That’s a very good question, Anon. I actually glad you asked. It was the question that only a few of the most renowned scholars of the olden times had ever asked. Really shows that you are indeed a remarkable member of your kind.”
>You bow, blushing. What did she mean by that, though. Did she think you are some kind of an enigma?
>Strange she thought that. However, the fact you got here being as you are, almost incompatible with the basis of the universal order, probably contributed to that thought a great deal.
>Amira continues, meanwhile:
>”No, Jalala didn’t and we do not know. Maybe, maybe not, but we will never know, because it doesn’t exist anymore, as the Goddess willed it out of the existence, by creating the present universe. The Divine White Mare Herself may know it, but the understanding of such thing may be so far out of comprehension of an existing creature, like Jalala or any of us, so it simply didn’t registered with her. Remember, that the prophetess was anxious her whole life she didn’t understood or remembered right the biggest part of what she has experienced when the Goddess spoke to her. Only the scorched words on the Rock are certain, after all. The Book is a mere supplement.”
>She looks up, but not out of respect for the topic, because next she says:
>”Unfortunately, by the position of the sun I can tell it is time for me to attend business of the realm. Please, think about what we have talked about and if you have questions, ask them next time.”
“Of course, my lady.”
>Amira stands up and stretches.
>You admire her powerful and elegant form.
>”Thank you, Anon.”
>She says suddenly.
“It’s my pleasure! Although, I wonder for what do I owe your praise, Amira.”
>She laughs.
>”I love to tell this story. About the Creation part of the Book. My mother told it me, almost exactly like this. When the occasion to retell it arises, I live through those moments again and again.”
>You recall her reluctance on the topic of her own foals, or to be more exact their absence and do not comment on that.
>But she continues.
>”I talked the topic out with my younger sisters, of course. Some of them at least. But most grasped the Book just fine. There is also young Haakim, but he’s a natural talent, so he needed very little nurturing in this regard.”
>You are not sure if that a complement or not, when put like that. Still, you bow, to look wise.
Didn't add that to the paste yet. I want to collect some feedback. The problem is, I invented the mythology to be too large it seems.
I now have a few variants how to proceed and in order to ask what to do I'm going to hint, that one of the things, among a few others I may plan for Anon, is to be a travelling scholar to learn more about the world, thus widening the scope and giving the protagonist a opportunity to being exposed to a few other cultures beyond Saddle Arabia or even Equestria
Would it be OK with you, guys?
Or should I keep the story inside Saddle Arabian setting, with only ever some things regarding Equestria?
Since the previous two updates turned to be somewhat of a fiasco, I want to contemplate if the mythology and religious lore is even worth delving in?
Anyway, it probably will take a while to tell everything in form of dialog. A good while. The story is slow in terms of pace as it is, so I'm not sure.
Please, save Anon from Saud- I mean Saddle Arabia!
by all means keep lore writing, just make sure it actually has a point. it's all fun and games imagining what could be, but if the story ends with anon being a living textbook of 99.9% made up lore with no real outcome, then whats the point
Well, tease them with a hint of teste. It's easier for a stallion to do it, since all he needs is good tail-eye coordination. One flick, and that's half off that bushel of apples. Anon would have to try and look sexy while clumsily trying to undo the buckle on his belt every time he wanted to buy some turnips at a reasonable price. And god help you if you forgot to wear the underwear with the broken button on the fly.
Nice prompts
Rarity teaches twilight how to be the perfect mare for Prince anon.
>Rarity teaches twilight how to be the perfect mare for Prince anon.

After practicing with rarity you are ready to meet your crush at the grand galloping Galla. You wear your dress and a dress him like my prince and bow. You constantly bring up proper edict and he seems to get more and more anger as the night goes on.
I bet ass slapping is really rare in Equestria, despite its prevalence in sexism. If you don't have hard-as-fuck hooves, you have paws (or dragon hands) with claws on them. Can't feel good.
>Ass slapping and ball groping is very prevalent in only unicorns.
>Pegasi use clouds to spy into the colts upstairs bedroom window
>Earth mares just shove their snouts into the stallions balls and get kicked in the skull for it, leading to them being regarded as thick headed.
>The reason Applejack had to relearn that it's okay to rely on her friends over the course of the TV show is because mares only want one thing and it's fucking disgusting
>Turns out, getting kicked in the head 3 or 4 times doesn't dissuade a mare like Applejack
>over the course of the TV show
I wonder what events would change if the show was RGRE.
>"Cadence and Shining would give herding a shot but no one ever asked until a drunk Celestia showed up in the empire wanting cuddles."
Eh, I was more a fan of cadence and gleaming (R63 Shining) herding with anon:
Such a shame that it got abandoned.
Who wrote that one green where Candace and Gleaming Shield visit a glory hole and fuck anon. May or May not have been rgre
LaP, and it's on fimfic.
It's alive!
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>Be Anon
>Be at a nice cafe with some of your horny friends
>Which you call unicorns, whether they like it or not
>It was a nice day
>A good week in a good month in an even better year
>You had a mug of hot tea clenched in a hand
>The mare's had honey in theirs
>You didn't, since the sweetness was "too much for most colts"
>"Hey Anon."
>You looked up to see mint dentist horse looking at you
>"You alright there? Looks like you haven't gotten your beauty sleep," she said, sipping her tea
"Eh, I'm a bad sleeper," you said with a shrug.
>"It's all of those clothes," purple horse said with a click of her tongue. "You give a colt too many of them and he's up all night worrying about what to wear. I'm surprise you get any sleep at all."
>Weird green horse shoves the mare
>The three laugh
>You smile, sipping your tea
>"Seriously though Anon, maybe you should send a letter to Princess Luna," Minuette said. "She'd probably be able to help you out with that."
"It's really no big deal," you said. "Actually, my sleep's been getting a whole lot better since I landed in Equestria."
>"Really? Any particular reason?" Amethyst said, head cocked to the side
>You opened your mouth to speak, then stopped
>You looked down at the table, attempting to find the right words
>It took awhile
>The three mares at the table waited patiently while you formed your answer
"...Did you know, well there's no way you'd no--Whatever. Back on my planet, we had insurance companies began to recently enforce a new rule in regard whenever someone required any sort of surgery--"
>"What's insurance?" Lyra asked
"It's an incredibly evil organization that makes you pay it, and if you don't and you get hurt you can get your life destroyed by medical bills."
>You cleared your throat, not noticing the wave of horror cross the mare's faces
"They were enforcing a thing where a team of business men review a person's medical file to determine if they need what is sometimes life-saving surgeries."
>"...What?" Minuette said quietly. "I... are these business ponies doctors?"
>"Did they have any medical training at all."
"I'm not entirely sure they even have business training, Minuette."
>You don't realize that the entire cafe, filled with tables of horses, were all quiet
>Canterlot ponies, known as aloft and snooty and even uncaring, were staring on in realized horror
"I think about that a lot before I go to sleep," you said with a nod. "That and the fact that they were attempting to pass something that would allow parents to chemically unbalance their children so that they can being the road in changing their gender."
>"W-What?" a pale Lyra said
>You just look down at your tea
"One of the states in my country was looking into sexual reconstruction surgery for children as young as three."
>You looked up, only now realizing that horror you had inflicted in your friends
>"Were... Did you escape an evil kingdom? Like a really evil, nasty one?"
>You frowned
"I'm... not really sure honestly..."
>The ponies in the cafe didn't like that answer
>You were carried up to Canterlot castle
>Some nice noble stallion wrapped you up in a blanket while a group of them ran to get the Princesses
>He started patting your head
>Ponies liked to do that to you for some reason
>You were the one supposed to be doing the petting

>"...Thy leaders allow WHAT to be done with foals?"
>You had a brief discussion with a sleepy blue alicorn
>It quickly turned to you in a fancy meeting room with a lot of important looking mares
>All looking horrified
>You're pretty sure they all think you escaped from a death world or something
>There were now two noble colts patting your head, their ears plugged up with wax so they wouldn't hear anything else you were saying
Random 3am prompt time, sorry if it's crap

>Anon ends up in RGREquestria
>At first, gets amused when he figures out the whole genders thing
>Exploits it a tiny bit, it's funny to get free drinks from mares
>The constant remarks about "proper" behavior and other stuff starts to grate on him soon, though
>Soon understands that all the mares that are trying to get with him only see him as a challenge and want to "tame" him, not interested in his actual personality at all,
>Also for the bragging rights, because he's an exotic alien stallion
>Loads of sex and free living sounds fun, but Anon wants a genuine connection
>Not interested in living with someone he'd fight with over sexist crap every single day
>Spends his free time alone, or going out to a bar to drink
>One day drinking, meets a few retired guardsmares
>They get talking
>The mares are actually very chill and aren't even making lewd remarks, let alone trying to grope him under the table
>The reason for that is because they're not retired of old age, but due to combat injuries
>They're scarred and crippled - a pegasus without a wing, an earth pony with both hindlegs gone, and a unicorn with a limp and a cracked horn
>No stallion would so much as look at them, so they think Anon's just being nice by talking to them, and they're glad for the conversation
>Eventually, that fact is brought up, and Anon gets angry at the whole situation
>It reminds him how veterans got treated back home, despite the vast majority of them being really great people
>He says it's bullshit, and they're the most pleasant bunch of mares he actually met so far
>Obviously they don't believe him, he's really frustrated and finally snaps after months of getting annoyed by mares giving him shit
>Stands up, grabs the earthpony while the other two freak out a little and follow him asking him what is he doing
>takes them home and fugs them silly
Hell yeah, more wall/fit/er
>Ywn have a herd of grizzled guard mares to cuddle and comfort as they take down their walls for the day and can finally arms. You will never make them feel safe and loved. They will never go back to work the next day with renewed energy and a reminder of what they're fighting for.
Dunno if flashing balls would work for anon. Maybe he just has to start dressing like an araki character, y'know flashy, but with lots of skin
I like the lore and world building, but having anon get out more and visit other places (like Equestria) to further his understanding of the world sounds more appealing than being stuck in Saddle Arabia. Maybe he can be like some sort of traveling wise man as the story goes on, or he starts out as a spiritual emissary seeking knowledge from the mythos of other cultures, and comparing it to what he's already learned from The Book
If I could presume to suggest, the unique spin to your story was that it was not set in Equestria. Anon was trying to survive in a world that, at the start, was extremely dogmatic backwoods.
We've gotten out of that part now, but I'm not sure turning it into a world-wide trek is a good idea in this story. In a sequel, yes! That would be fun, and a lot of work. Don't want you to burn out in this story.
I'm also worried that we would be leaving behind the RGRE elements. The mystery of Anon to his lover also needs to be addressed. Amira is turning Anon into a good little believer, but he is still withholding information that might change their relationship.
For my part, to suggest a story segment, what would a family reunion look like? Given the potential size of Amira's family, it might be as overwhelming as an Apple Family Reunion.
If you do wish to continue down the path of visiting other cultures, I'll still enjoy it.
Anon, I know the world really sucks right now, and it would be great if we could be saved by cute ponies. But it isn't going to happen.
I said this since the posting of the very first part: Get him out of that sandy hell.
No amount of religious revelations are worth being an inferior, lesser being, always on the edge of being literally executed on the spot. He just needs to leave, somehow.
More please MORE
>"It's an incredibly evil organization that makes you pay it, and if you don't and you get hurt you can get your life destroyed by medical bills."
A very apt description.
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>>"Were... Did you escape an evil kingdom? Like a really evil, nasty one?"
Oh shit, I just realized something
Stallions dig scars
>"Okay let's see, we've got your name, age, weight, height…"
>Princess Twilight paces circles around you while she continues listing off things you've covered with her.
>"And remind me again, a uh, 'manhole' is NOT meant for people to go through?"
"Well, it's definitely not meant for people to fall through, but people can go through it. It's what lets them get to an underground part, usually sewers."
>Princess Twilight hums and swishes a levitating quill over another levitating scroll, "Right right. So I guess there goes that hypothesis."
>She sets the writing utensils down on a nearby table and blows her bangs out of her eyes before looking up at you.
>You shoot her back a friendly smile, expecting her to have some other thing to test.
>"Well, I think that's everything I need to know for now. I need to compare notes and then probably start having sessions with both you and Anon so we can find out as much as we can about this new situation we find ourselves in."
>You pout a little.
"Sorry for the trouble, Princess Twilight, I probably should've listened to those construction people."
>She shakes her head and smiles up at you, "Don't be sorry, from what you've said it sounds like it was an accident. Plus, this might open the door to some new possibilities that might let us send you both back home!"
>You feel a pang of sorrow at the mention of going back, and how that might not ever happen.
>The princess winces a little, probably seeing your change of face, "I-It might not happen, yes, but I promise you that we will do everything we can to help."
>You nod and wipe a single tear from your eye.
"Thanks Princess, I really do appreciate everything you've done so far."
>Twilight livens up before rubbing the back of her head with a hoof, "Oh you can just call me Twilight."
"But you're the princess for uh, Ponyville? Right?"
>She nods, "I am, but I try not to think of myself as anything more than a friend to everyone."
>You hum in acknowledgement.
"That's super humble of you. Well okay, Twilight, what's next?"
>She puts a hoof to her chin, "I think that's everything for now."
"Then we're not going to do the colander with the lights?"
>"The colander with the- OH the aptitude sensor! Hmm, Yes I suppose it does look a little like that doesn't it?" She thinks aloud with a giggle.
"Yeah I uh, I mean Anon told me that we don't have magic but… would it hurt to put the hat on me too?" you ask sheepishly.
>Twilight looks to you and then down a nearby hall and back to you again, "Oh why not. I probably need to calibrate it anyway."
>You follow her down the hall she was looking at, admiring the crystalline structure and the various fancy doodads and things on little tables and on the walls.
>As you are walking you spot some movement around the next doorway and tense up.
>"Femanon?" Twilight stops and turns.
>You probably made a noise when you froze up.
>Peeking out at you from around the corner are a pair of emerald green eyes and purple snout.
>Twilight sighs, "Oh, spike there you are. C'mon out and say hi."
"Ohmygod" you whisper, cupping your hand over your face.
>The little dragon emerges from around the doorway and steps over towards you with his little feet.
>He's got a little pudgy belly and a little tail too!
>He clears his throat and stands up straight, "Spike, the Hero of the Crystal Kingdom and royal assistant of Ponyville's own Princess Twilight at your service" his arm extends upwards as he lists his title and holds it up in the air.
>Oh god HE'S SO CUTE!
>Is he going to do a little bow?
>If he does a little bow you swear you're going to cry.
>Spike bows deeply, and brings his outstretched arm to his chest as he does.
"Ohmygodohmygod" you excitedly clap your hands together as he does his little bow.
>Spike jumps back upright and looks up at you warily, "uh, d-did I do something wrong?"
"No! I'm sorry! I just- it's just that you're so CUTE! C-can I pick you up?"
>You can see a deep purple color begin to fill his cheeks.
>"Wha- uh… okay I guess?"
>You squeal as you kneel down and cup your arms under his armpits and lean in close to hoist him up.
>He's denser than he looks and you groan as you lift him but you're able to bring him in close and heft him up into a hug.
"This is the best day of my life right now" you coo as you gently twist your hips from side to side.
>Spike chuckles, "H-happy to be of service" he says while gently patting your shoulder.
>You turn to find Twilight looking up at you intently.
"Oh! I-I'm so sorry Pri- uh, Twilight. Sh-should I have asked you first before I picked him up? I-I know you raised him and everything."
>Twilight seems to snap to attention, "Huh? Oh! No no, you're fine. I was just noting the differences in behavior you and Anonymous have had."
>You blush, not certain if that's a good or a bad thing about you and gingerly set Spike down.
>Spike laughs, "Oh yeah I remember meeting Anon for the first time, he was all 'Whoa! Is that a dragon? Can you breathe fire? YOU CAN? T-Twilight do you have something he can burn?!" Spike says, trying to imitate Anon's deeper voice.
>Twilight giggles at the reenactment and you find yourself laughing along with them.
>"That's the part I find fascinating. I would've expected the opposite reaction from both of you, at least to some degree…" Twilight ponders on this for a moment, "I think you should visit Rarity first once we're done here, you two seem like you'll have more in common than anypony else and you're going to need new clothes anyway."
>You look down at your ragged workout gear.
"Oh. Yeah. I forgot about that."
>"But first let's go get the aptitude sensor maintenanced and try it out just to see."
>You and Twilight get to work, occasionally she asks you to hand her something or help turn a dial.
Tbh this story is getting dry as hell, it’s just a bunch of made up fluff and then anon thinking “woah, that’s crazy”
Throw a wrench into the works, have him slip up and mention something incriminating about earth or how humans eat meat, maybe Amira gets suspicious and hires some goons to track down where exactly Anon was found and they find like a wallet made of leather or some shit.
I’m happy you’re updating and whatnot but “Hoers Allah” Fluff is getting old
>There's more
>She has to tell you where something is a couple of times, much to your embarrassment, and eventually she sets to doing the rest of the work herself while you make juice with Spike in the kitchen.
>"Okay! I think she's all ready to go" Twilight says as she levitates the helmet and sets it on her head.
>You watch as one by one the bulbs light up in sequence on the helmet, "Each bulb represents a unit of magical energy contained within the host. Your average race ranges from about two to four bulbs, but there's exceptions like Zebras who are usually on par with unicorns at six to eight."
>As she was explaining, her eighth bulb lit up and proceeded onto the ninth and then tenth, "Having a higher base energy doesn't have causation with magical skill, but they often follow together. Before I became an alicorn-"
>OH that's what Anon meant, you get it now!
>"I was at about 10 bulbs, but now I'm at about 14 and it seems to keep going up with time."
>Her helmet dings and you can see 15 bulbs lit up on her head.
>"Oh wow, I'm up another one" she says, pleasantly surprised to herself.
>Twilight levitates the helmet off and sets it down in the seat, "So I guess just have a seat and we'll try it out."
>You wait for Twilight to move out of the way and look at the child-sized chair.
>You take the helmet into your hands and spin around to sit.
>Okay Femanon, think magic thoughts.
>Bibbidy bobbidy boo!
>Abra kadabra!
>Za Warudo!
>Wait, does that last one count as magic?
>"OH WOW!"
>You jump at Twilight's exclamation.
>Twilight looks back at you with a shocked expression on her face and a glass levitated by her lips, "Oh sorry, I just really like how you made thi-"
>Oh the juice. Well hey that's a win for you right?
>You see shards of glass and juice begin to scatter across the floor as Twilight darts towards you, "Oh. My. SUN."
>You look down where Twilight is currently inspecting.
>Your hand which is holding the helmet and there are two bulbs illuminated with a third very faintly glowing.
>A combination of fear and excitement begins to well up inside of you.
"I-is that good?"
>"I… I don't know what this means."
>"Is it just me, or is it getting brighter too?" Spike remarks, as he walks into the room carrying a little dustpan and broom.
>Cute baby dragon butler AND magic powers?!
>This really is the greatest day of your life!

"What a day…" you mutter to yourself.
>You take the frosty cold bottle from Mac while he pops the lid off his drink next.
>You could probably ask Twilight or some kind of smith pony to fashion you a bottle opener, but you really only like drinking on the farm and Mac or AJ are usually down to use their teeth to pop open some cold ones with you.
>You and Big Mac clink glass.
>You take a hearty swig of yours then remember that the bottles are smaller and now yours is almost empty.
>Still, it REALLY hits the spot and you let out a sigh of affirmation along with Mac.
"What a day, eh Mac?"
>"Yyup" he adds, going back for another sip.
>Fem crash landed yesterday and has been with Twilight since to get acclimated and, knowing Twilight, probably go through a 50 scroll long questionnaire.
>You were so wired from the event that you barely got any sleep.
>Normally not an issue since you're mostly your own boss except today happened to be jam day.
>It's all han- hooves on deck for jam day and you are WIPED!
>Applejack took Apple Bloom to some crusaders thing in return for helping out and Granny is sleeping in her rocking chair so it's just you, Mac, some early afternoon shade and two cases of cold ones.
"How do they go through so much jam so quickly, Mac? Those jars we fill are HUGE."
>Mac shrugs as he leans his head back against the tree you're both leaned on.
"There's gotta be a better way of doing this, Mac. On the last get together, I remember overhearing Braeburn say something about filling jars in two churns."
>Mac spits out his sip of cider and breaks into a coughing fit.
"Whoa! Don't inhale it, buddy" you get a clean rag from one of your satchels and start patting his cheeks with it, "You alright?"
>Mac, looking visibly flustered, avoids your gaze and responds with a raspy "yup" between a fit of coughing and laughter.
>You can't help but laugh along with him, the silly goober, and before long you're both resting your heads together taking unison swigs.
"Anyway, I was saying, we gotta talk to Braeburn and find out how he's doing it over in Appleloosa."
>Mac giggles again and playfully pats the back of your hand, "Nnope"
"What? Appleoosa trade secret you think?"
>Mac again shakes his head, "Nnope"
"Then wha-"
>Mac, sits up with a tipsy wobble and points to an empty jar nearby, he brings a hoof down by his belly and makes two motions up with it.
"Mac, what?"
>What is he-
>You look to Mac, a giggle beginning to break out on your lips.
>You both burst out into laughter in unison, holding each other up because everytime you lock eyes one of you says "two churns" and starts laughing again.
>Cum jar, never not funny.
>You pray that Mac is only laughing because it's a lewd joke.
>It takes a couple more bottles before you both settle down and Mac is leaned more against you than he is the tree at this point.
>Probably time to lay off now. Ever since you got your appendix removed, too much booze, even small pony booze, makes your stomach hurt.
>Big Mac stays quiet for a moment.
"Yup?" you repeat, thinking you might've mumbled the first time.
>He squirms a little against you and takes one more quick swig of his drink before speaking.
>Mac again kind of dances around his point, but you get the gist that he wants to know what you think of Fem.
>Now it's your turn to squirm as you fidget a little at the question.
"Uh I dunno uh… It's cool but it's also super sad. To be honest I've been both thinking about it way too much and trying not to think about it at all because it's… a lot."
>"Move?" he asks with a hint of sadness in his voice.
"Me? No! No, no way" You respond, hugging him close, "I've got a pretty good thing going here, and I love all of you Apples and y'know who knows how this could turn out y'know?"
"Exactly, I don't know, nobody knows and we just y'know, we just take it a day at a time and y'know we-"
>Big Mac's ear flicks your cheek and you snap out of your little anxiety rant.
>You both sit together in silence, only broken up by the occasional swig of cider.
"What, you mean this morning?"
>She was on edge since getting back to the farm yesterday and pretty much all morning.
"Yeah, what's up with that? I know nobody saw this coming, but it's not like they didn't onboard a human once before right? Can't be all that different can it?"
"I mean okay it is different, but Fem seems to be taking things okay. I don't see why that has AJ all riled up."
"What? Mac, you know something? You're usually not so reserved with me."
>Big Mac turns some so he can look up at you, he looks to the farmhouse briefly and then back up at you.
>You can see he slipped a couple more swigs while you were talking because he's kind of looking a little past you at the same time.
>Mac attempts to put a hoof to his lips in a shush motion, but misses his snout a couple times before settling to press his hoof to his cheek.
>You nod and lean in close.
>"She…" and he wiggles his eyebrows.
>You shake your head, not following.
>He drunkenly drags the syllable out, patting your chest.
>Wait, is he saying?
>He nods.
"Her? And me?"
>He brings his hoofs to his face with excitement before seeming to remember he wants to keep this quiet and smooshes his hoof to your face and makes a shush noise.
>She likes you?
>That's… it's not like you don't get along with her.
>If anything you maybe get along with her best.
>But then what does that have to do with this mor-
>You shield your eyes from the bright flash of violet and Twilight's voice calls out, "Anon? O-Oh-"
>You get your sight back and see Twilight staring down at you and Mac, his hoof cupping your cheek while he was trying to drunkenly shush you.
"It's not what it looks like, we've been drinking!"
>Twilight lifts her head and she turns it to face slightly away from you
>"Mhm!" she responds, biting her lip before stammering out her continued thought, "I-I came to find you because something happened with Femanon."
>Your stomach drops.
"What happened?"
>Mac grumbles as you nudge him into leaning on the tree so you can start getting up.
>"She's fine, but I need you to come with me to the castle. There's… something we need to test."
>You look back to Big Mac, worry must be written all over your face because his own face begins to sink as you lock eyes.
>He shoos you along and you nod before turning back to Twilight.
"Alright. Are we walking or-"

That's all for now, thanks for reading
Oh and I'd appreciate hearing thoughts from anyone who has been reading along so far. There's a bunch of story threads I'm stringing up with each update which is just about done and the order in which they're handled has some give, so feedback is very much appreciated.
I think your story is coming along exceedingly well so far. We don't often see greens with femanon, much less with her and regular anon both present, I really like the opportunity for ponies to compare and contrast the two humans the way Twilight did earlier when they met Spike. I'm also curious about what the overall story is leading to.

Also, Mac continues to be cute.
At this point I can't tell if Mac is trying to help be a good wingman for his sister, or if he's gay for anon, or maybe both.
>ponies giving headpats for comfort
This is adorable.

Ah just let us dream.
>Tbh this story is getting dry as hell
It takes place in a desert stupid
I enjoy what you're writing so far, and I'm curious where you'll go with it. Pleasantly surprised at how smooth of a read it is, I have yet another green in this thread to look forward to now.
>Mofuckin' engi
and now
If I've forgotten one, it's probably not because I didn't like the story, I'm just absentminded.
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I agree with previous Anons, your story desperately needs some conflict because it seems like all the ones that were established early on just fizzled out. Preferably something that comes naturally from the story, not just band of goons abducting Anon or some other bullshit like that.
At the start it seemed like a more action oriented story with a pro active protagonist, now it's just a slice of life in a setting that doesn't seem particularly conductive to me to this type of story.

You can't just make it a travel guide and focus solely on worldbuilding because surprise, surprise most people will have a different ideas about how the equestria works. You aren't making a completely original piece of fiction, it's based on already established world. So no matter how interestign you make it you will alienate people with different ideas if you don't have anything to draw them in aside from worldbuilding (interesting plot).
pic related
I liked it. Better than the majority of the shit on /mlp/ since about 2016. Male dom is a rare gem in the septic tank that is modern writing.
I've been around reading pony words on 4chins since it first aired in 2010 and the only place for it was /b/.
He's not wrong, this place used to be a hive of activity, now it looks like MSN messenger servers circa 2011. Still trying, but definitely on it's last leg.
What he said. Either you end the story right now with Anon accepting his fate as supposedly-not-a-slave. or do something else.
The thing is, I don't think Anon becoming a wandering scholar is even possible in the setting you created. Males are frowned upon for even knowing how to read, are the Allah horses really going to so much as even entertain the notion of a male scholar? I remember the utter disdain Amira had for male scholars during his examination with that Equestrian mare. Hell, are they even going to tolerate a lone, wandering male? They'd just as likely grab him and claim him for themselves.
I remember the part about donkeys, where their gender roles are a bit more equal, yet the horses force them to pay extra taxes just for the fact. Everything points to the role you described being utterly impossible in your setting.
WallFlower Blush lives up to her reputation, eh?
Didn't even notice her.
Was looking for this, thanks
Fuck, I knew I was forgetting something
phone posting with a tiny ass screen bites me in the ass again
I look forward to your green too, Wall/fit/er author, I'm just too lazy to scroll up atm.
Not crap, quite the opposite
you should write more
The next morning after the veteran mares leave, the unicorn cancels the illusion spell and the three return to normal healthy mares.
>"i can't belive that actually worked" the Pegasus says.
This is neat, I wouldn't mind reaing more of this. Too bad it's just a prompt, doomed to fizzle out and go nowhere. Oh well.
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Ignore the middle of the night ramble, I've been drinking.
Sure it's a shame when prompts don't go anywhere, but they're still one of the most important parts of the thread imo. I've written many prompts, and it servers as a good way to practice writing. People can also tell me if they're shit so I'll (hopefully) know what to adjust for my next one.
Prompt writing is also just straight up fun.
I could be biased, however. I wrote a prompt about misfit single mares and babysitter anon forming a found family, and engie of all people picked it up and turned into something more. You can always get lucky that your prompt inspires you. Don't ever be afraid to write prompts, but also listen to the thread. If people don't wanna read it, move on to another idea. They can't all be winners and that's normal. Enjoy the act of writing and the creativity.
>You can always get lucky that your prompt inspires you.
That your prompt inspires someone, rather.
I'm all for writing prompts, but without people actually turning any of them into stories it just feels like dying throes. I know everyone says DUDE /rgre/ IS FUCKING DEAD, but there's plenty of threads that just sort of 'exist'. Kinderquestria is a good example. Loads of prompts, even art, but there's probably been 1 actual story start in months, and it's already abandoned.
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I write prompts for my own enjoyment. I don't write them with the hope that someone else will continue them for me. To me they will always stay as prompts, until maybe one day I'll feel confident enough to expand on one. Until then, I will continue to write them no matter the status of the thread and if they make one person reading them happy too that's good enough for me. I see literally no reason to ever stop writing prompts as long as inspiration strikes.
And that's fine. but a prompt to story rate of 1000 to 1 sucks
Then write some stories.
I'm not a competent writer, I'd rather draw. Even then, this thread doesn't give me the same drive it used to.
Then draw based on a prompt?
Inspiration is like fire, sometimes its just a spark and sometimes it's a whole bonfire, but you dont know what'll trigger someone's muse until it's posted.
The snowpony stuff spawned from a single ponified image that was randomly posted as a thread OP and that generated / is still generating a fuckton of content
>draw based on a prompt
i have, multiple times, in fact. it's not my fault these prompts are just so one-note.
>Oh yeah, lemme just draw the thing that just happened. I'm sure this will please everyone who read it, imagined the scenario, and brushed it off.
it'd be different if people gave more (You)s for creative works, because then it's incentive to keep going. but you get one or two copy paste replies, get bummed out, and not do it again. i never gave a fuck about snowponies, either.
I like it, it's good so far. You're avoiding the usual pitfalls.
(You)s are nice, but when I was a writefag I wrote because writing was fun and I enjoyed the universe my thread cooked up. Sure the (You)s gave me a pep in my step, but the reason I wrote in the first place was because I liked creating something. Passion must come from within, Anon. You have to do something because (You) like it, not because someone pats you on the head and tells you what a good little boy you are.
>"Alright, alright, alright. I'm really sorry sweetie, but I need to explain it to me one more time. It's-- there's way-- I mean, is CAN'T make an--"
>A fancy dressed pegasus was about to slam a hoof down onto the table, but stopped herself
>This was Captain Spitfire, leader of the Wonderbolts and one of the most striking commanders of her age
>A mare that graduated from West Trot; an ancient pegasus military academy
>At the academy, she had learned a lot, but one of the most important was manners in front of a stallion
>She let out a labored sigh, grabbing a mug between her hooves
>Her entire body was tense, and veins could be seen bulging from her forehead
>"Please," she said, lowering her voice. "Just one more time. Do your best to explain this... madness."
>From underneath a mountain of blankets and comforting stallions, you nodded
"So, you know genders."
>"Yes. The two of them."
"Well, some people insist that there are like twenty-four."
"Then there are people that say you can be a different gender whenever you want. These people are called gender fluid. These people get really upset when you call them by other than their preferred pronouns."
"There's also a load of different sexualities."
>The mug in the Captain's hooves cracked as her eye twitched
>"Please name one for me. Don't even think about it; just one off the top of your head that isn't the normal sexuality."
"Well... I guess pansexual?"
"Yeah. I'm pretty sure those folks are into kitchenware. Which is sorta weird since I'm pretty sure they actually don't know how to cook for themselves."
>"I see," Spitfire said with a jerky nod. "And is there any medical backing to their different genders."
"No. Though some doctors are caving in and writing medical journals in favor of it."
>"...Don't they have to take oaths to protect their patients?"
"They do, but most medical organizations are just big businesses. They care more about the profits they make than helping people. If saying the wrong thing gets them paid more then they'll happily do it."
>Spitfire stood up, bowing her head
>"Excuse me for a second," she said, picking up her chair and placing it on her back
>You and the ponies in the room watched as she trotted toward the door
>She opened it, stepped outside, and closed it gently behind her
>A few moments later, you heard a frustrated scream, followed by the sound of wood breaking
>She hadn't been the first one to lose her temper
>Princess Luna had teleported away after you attempted to explain pedophilia and how most of those in power seemed sexual predators
>You didn't hear any yelling, but for an hour or so there had been very mild earth quakes
>Even Princess Celestia, famously known for her composure, he been forced to leave the room more than once
>You had a feeling that if earth managed to get into contact with Equestria now there might be issues...
Though I do hope that he elaborates that most of the stupid shit is coming from women and brain-damaged men. Otherwise you could get some very wack assumptions.

>"Oh, and they think healthy living is offensive to fat people."
>fucking /pol/shit
I'm aware, and I want to, but when the response is better elsewhere then it's hard to justify the time spent.
Yeah, as cathartic as it is to see ponies reacting the way one should react to our world, I come here to pretend it doesn't exist, not see it reiterated we're in the clown timeline.
this is your reality anon

accept it
Go back to /co/ or wherever the hell you fags keep coming from.
Can't wait for the poner assassins finding and eliminiating all of these world ruining shitstains, without a way for them to strike back.
A whole lot of 'nothing personal, kid' will happen, I bet.
Anon's half remembered explanations + the increasing amount of ponies comforting him/themaelves is making an otherwise stereotypical woah post into something cute, please keep going.
Same. If I wanted more of my shit life, I wouldn't be here in a thread devoted to a specific scenario of a little girl's cartoon show. Surely the subject matter of this thread alone (again, posting our little fanfiction devoted to media aimed towards children, specifically an alternate universe where males are treated with empathy) would be enough of a hint.
>wake up
>do shit around house
>check 4chins
>see dozens of new posts in thread
>sweet, maybe engie, lap, or qoc posted something new
>it's just shitposts, roleplay, and uwu tfw marefriend shit
You always find a way to disappoint, RGRE.
Godamnit, I walked into that.
Unironically made me laugh/10
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Pretty sure LaP's doing the /pol/ stuff. I can't say I blame him, you gotta vent somehow.
At the same time, though, I understand where the "I don't like /pol/ stuff" crowd is coming from too, because this is definitely my escapism thread.
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I enjoy mixing my rgr with irl Earth elements. Who doesn't want tactical mare teams extracting completely unaware men back to Equestria?
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>Agent compromised, requesting backup.
>everything I don't like is /pol/
Where is this fucking /pol/ posting I keep hearing about? I just see basic bitch off topic posting.
This I like it when the bad shit in our world gets its shit kicked in but I come here to escape it
This makes me want a green where Anon is "seduced" by a couple of fillies.
He goes along with it because he knows RGR rules will see him getting a slap on the wrists at worse.
>ha, ha, ha what if being a pedo was okay ha, ha, ha
>wouldn't that be funny? ha, ha, ha.
lol k
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These fillies need erotic punishment, clearly.
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>noooooo not the heccarino fictional characteroonies!!1
Screw that.
I'll be the one seducing the fillies.
Huh. I didn't know that RGRE was pedo country. Kinda disappointing, ngl.
>Mares have hooves, which (just in case you did not know) are very hard
>Griffins have claws which (just in case you did not know) are very sharp
>Getting slapped on the ass is not a pleasant affair for Anon
>Stallions might have the instincts to mindlessly buck their assailant, but Anon has no such luck
>Anon wears thick the Equestrian equivalent of leather chaps under his pants to protect his poor, bruisable flesh from the perverted mares in his life
>Unfortunately, the material (unyielding as it is) gives the impression that he has a firm ass
>And what mare doesn't like a colt with a nice ass?
Not sure I can find the time to actually write it out, I'm already writing stuff for another thread, and if they find out I've been secretly spending time with two threads, they'd beat me for being unfaithful to them.
The solution is simple, though. He just needs some good metal gear, something that's solid, so there will be no more buttcheek clapping. Otherwise he will alert all the mares, even if he is trying to sneak away. The thick-headed dummy.
>metal gear, something that's solid
Goddamnit, anon
>Stallion teacher on filly student crime
damn, really makes me think
>talking to it
fucking moron
It doesn't really look like his writing style desu
can I get a small hint so I can read more of your stuff
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Thank you very much for the feedback, Anons!
Many good points, many things to consider.
I'll try to do something and not ruin the story with my autism.
Damn you, Anon.
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You're a goddamn national treasure, Anon.
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Much like humans, ponies tend to gesture while they talk to help illustrate their point. But ponies don't have hands or arms, so they must rely on what god gave them to accomplish this. A pegasus is easy, they can use their wings and feathers as clumsy pseudo-paws. Unicorns are also easy, since they can use magic to visualize their thought process. But what does the humble earth pony have? No wings, no magic, and her hooves are just as clumsy as a unicorn's or pegasus's.

Gentlemen. I propose that earth ponies have an unusually developed set of facial muscles. And that is because earth ponies have to rely on wriggling their eyebrows, flaring their nostrils, and making exaggerated facial expressions to help give them the same point-across-getting capabilities that pegasi and unicorns have. Something something RGRE, now Anon knows why Applejack slapped his ass and then immediately made a silly face at him.
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Precisely. And now, it's blindingly obvious what Apple Bloom is trying to convey.
Top tier
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which one of you fagniggers BURNT DINNER
Does anyone have that story where Anon uses RainbowDash as fleshlight after she blueballs him one too many times?
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To add on upon my previous post >>38596414 and possibility of conflicts. It feels like in a few places you established some frictions between Anon and Amira but then just never went with it at the last moment. Like with Anon explaining human religions and Amira never asking him about what he personally believes. Or with eating meat being such a big taboo.
Another thing is that Anon seems very receptive to horse arabia ideas. He is very rarely critical of them and accepts them without questioning. Like the existence of horse creator despite there being dozens of other possible explanations. If he just stuck a little harder to his own views and morals, even just inwardly because of the fear of possible reprisal, it would already make the story a little more interesting. Instead he acts and thinks like a good little student of horse faith that doesn't have any outside perspective.
And that goes also for the possibility of him travelling the wider world. It's a lot more interesting if he has his own unique perspective rather than just being an empty lens through which we observe the world. Because it is boring.
Bigdad rarity comic did unspeakable things to me
It's because some people just have to push their shitty politics onto a board about fantasy ponies and earth but way happier.
I was expecting more drama as well, as the opening scene was two homosexuals being killed by exposure to the elements, the guards affair with his herdmate, and the demon/magic detection intervention.

But you must remember, anon has no magic, and has relatively weak constitution compared to his earth pony hosts strength. Stockholm syndrome is real, he's not in the worst position, he does not have viable alternatives, and he is playing it close to the vest despite his errors.
You know what I just realized?
Life for the foal of Anon and his mare would have the most groan-inducing parents.
Think about it, not only do they have to deal with stupid "Mom jokes" but because their dad is of an RGR nature, they'll also have to deal with "Dad jokes."
And it can get worse, too.
What if it's a nerdy Anon married to an equally nerdy mare?
They'd do cosplay together and quote old movies at each other in public all the time.
If I was that filly or colt, I'd have my face in my hooves constantly and asking myself why this is my life.
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>Marry Derpy
>You're both Twifags and manage to herd with Twilight.
>Have the silly idea of dressing up as each other for Nightmare night.
>Dinky hasn't reached the age of being embarrassed by her parents yet so she joins in.
I wanna marry the Derpster


That sad thing is that I can't tell if it's a parody or not.
>They'd do cosplay together and quote old movies at each other in public all the time.
baneposting transcends dimmensions
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This might actually be what you're looking for - not sure, though.

Find & replace:
"human" -> "zebra"
Aye, that's the one.
>"You're a big mare."
>"For you."
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Nice. God, I love Rainbow Dash.
Now that I think about it, where is the anon kirin police green that some faggot was going to write? Because I really want to read it and that faggot is good drawfag too
I would all three of them cause I’m nasty like that
you could get him sent to Equestria, and decide to stay there. Unless I misread something badly, Amira was doing some political shenanigans in regards to Anon and knowledge about him when Stardust wanted to return to Equestria and tell ponies there about him.

>”We have encountered a problem of a significant scale and importance, it seems. I must report to the Academy as soon as possible. I hope you understand that my duty, the interests of my homeland, require me to—”.
>Amira’s expression didn’t betray anything more than a polite understanding.
>”My dear Stardust,” she addresses her simply by the name, now that military mares have left the room, “I implore you not to make a haste.”
>”Think of it, please. Caravans are slow this time of year. You will spend an inadmissible amount of time underway. And traveling alone is very dangerous, as I cannot dispatch my soldiers to accompany you beyond the borders of Saddle Arabia.”
>”But I must—”
>”In several months there will be regular rotation of the diplomatic staff to Equestria. You can return home with them. It will be much faster and infinitely more safe for you.”
>Stardust swayed her ears, thinking.
>”Yes,” she answered at last,” You’re right, noble Amira. I’ll take your offer. Forgive me for my rashness.”

this smelled 100% like political maneuvering, not any kind of concern for Stardust's welfare.
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Oh you.
It's always a pleasure to have readers who like to read between the lines.
I hope we will know what happened to her and what are the possible consequences of ponies discovering anon's peculiarities.
I have thought about what I would have done in anon's place. I don't want to die so I have to talk somehow, I don't think they would accept silence. At the same time I don't want for them to know how humans here and what we have done. But would I lie to the pony that saved my life and provided to me for so long? I wouldn't want to lie to her.
It's tough.
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Personally I would be pursuing the local knowledge of metallurgy and chemistry. Specifically: What material is anti-magic? Are the basic elements and molecules the same? Are the advanced?

He knows the military has armor and weapons, so they have some metallurgy at least, and anti-magic properties would be basic military knowledge. Can't have hornheads just telekinesis your calvary to death.

That's what I would have been asking the equestrian scholar about. In subtle conversation of course.
Also inquire to thier language, and foreign religious practices. He knows Amira thinks Celestia is a God-Head of some sort. Eyeing the desert basin creator-message is a novelty, but establishing self defense is the priority. Sure he's protected by her guards, but Physical > Social Status Even Amira would think this after seeing how frail he is compared to them.

Hell, I had hopped he would establish a relationship with the rats that stole his cheese, because he clearly identified thier metaphysical relationship by singing the Alladin song, especially if he's staying in the social realm.
Damn, it's been a while since I thought about that. I need some rgre buddy cop in my life
Haven't written much... eh..
Maybe someday.
>tfw you see Anon walking past your window wearing tight short-shorts
>You have no idea where he got them, but you desperately wish to shake the hoof of whoever sold them to him
>"I say, darling, that colt is thiccer than a bowl of oatmeal."
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>anon hears rares calling him "thiccer than a bowl of oatmeal"
>he knows what it means, but decides to fuck with her by asking her if she called him fat
>rarity immediately goes into damage control and tries to convince anon that he looks good
>then she accidentally leta it slip that she'd want him to sit on her face
>anon is partially disgusted and partially aroused, but only lets his diagust show
>rarity tries to backpedal again
>until anon tells her that his meaty posterior would probably crush her skull
>a muffled "w0t" is all she can voice before he sits down on her head
>ywn be lusted after by a perverted mare
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>i'm gonna have sexual thoughts about that
i knew i saw that phrase somewhere before
I want to live in a MASH shack with a bunch of guardsmares
Where can I find more rgr stories? Not just mlp but I'm general.
I just want more rgr
I want to read and fantasize about being treated with kindness and care instead like garbage like I am now
There was a sci-fi story about humans living in the veil of madness, that blocks magic, and escaping it to dominate a variety of female (furry) aliens who have a 10:1 female male ratio, and and conscript them into a human foreign legion. Don't have a link, sorry.

Or the gender flipped Twilight.

They exist.
A Brother's Price is a good one
That would be Out of Cruel Space, here you go:

Here's a list of non mlp RGR stories.
The absolute state of this board.
The vodka principality of this post
The sheer schnapps of this series of pixels.
I've been reading that one for a while now. The author is clearly autistic, but the writing isn't bad. Can't say the same for the fucking rest of the stories on reddit though, holy shit are they awful.
There was a short series of greentexts probably around 2019, 2018. Anon's out with his herd (one of each pony race) and they're beset upon by timberwolves. Their foals are being chased, and are now lost in the woods. It featured his herd working together to help find their foals. The pegasi flew up to locate them, the unicorn used her magic to blast through the trees, and the earth pony kicked the piss out of the wolves. They got their foals back and then comforted Anon because surely (as a father in RGRE) he would be emotionally distraught that his foals had been in danger. Anyone else remember that, or did I dream it?
>the writing isn't bad
It's fucking atrocious
It's not atrocious. Atrocious is the rest of the stories on there. I'd say Out of Cruel Space is middling.
If you're willing to call a story where the super space military recruits autists because "they know scifi" and are good at engineering then you and I have different takes on what constitutes the middle
>someone watched Predator 2018 and thought it was a good enough movie to rip off
Not sure if hilarious of sad
Yeah, that's pretty bad. It's still unironically better than most there however.
that... was not it...
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I remember reading "Everyone's a Catgirl" on there once, the whole setting was an obvious setup for a hentai setting with adventure elements. I immediately dropped it when I got to the first sex scene and the faggot gated it behind a patreon paywall.

Reddit is where all the shit authors and scuzzballs go to write.
But did you read it?
I've gotten into the habit of reading the first and last lines of any greentext linked to me before I dive in.
>the first
Princess Celestia certainly had the comfiest bed Silver has ever laid upon.

>last lines
Yeah, and I sure don't remember anyone named "Silver" in a prompt where Anon's herd saves their foal from a timberwolf. Checkmate atheists.
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This is neat! Look at all that rgr
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aw shit nigga
The fuck is wrong with your life.
Quick! Recommend me a story!
Boku no Pico
its got to RGRE
Boku yes Pico
Spaghetti and Fillies. I've been rereading it and it really is one of the best RGRE fics imo. Fucking phenominal characterization.
Its a slippery slope retard.
Where's the pastebin? Reddit blocks the 5th chapter
>non pony
Into the trash it goes.
We need more stories like this and less uwu i wanna mare to spoon me i'm scawed of da dawk. RGRE needs more big dick energy.
Prove it
Five years ago MAPs were things you used for navigation. Now MAPs are things you should go out of your way to avoid.
>tfw you just see a cute little horse in a hoodie
>What you don't see is three other pegasi just out of sight closing in to capture you so that they have someone to cook and clean their dirty cloud house
>Pegasi hunting tactics at their best
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>What you don't see is three other pegasi

>Tuck the cute horse under your arm.
>Run while setting up a date with the qt under my arm.
Hoodie horse earned her position as marefriend by being bait, now the others have got to prove their worth and catch me before i make it to the diner she recommended or she's going to end up mono.
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Stealth mares
I also want to know this. Is there a tag on FiMFiction for RGR?
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>"Anon, can you talk to to Nonny, please? I'm worried about her. She's so sad."
>Ah yes, the other human in Equestria...for a given value of human.
>Poor Cockney bastard got turned into a mare by whatever force sent him to Equus.
>So while he's not QUITE as miserable as he would have been back on Earth, he - or rather, SHE -- isn't a whole lot better off, either.
>He's still expected to fill the same sort of roles in society that he would have back home...and he's no good at any of them.
>And you're getting distracted in the middle of a conversation again. You'd blame the home-brewed beer you're drinking, but you're like this when you're sober too.
"I'm not exactly much better, Pinkie."
>"You're not lying around in the dark all the time either!"
"Ponks, I lie around in the dark a lot. I'm clinically diagnosed with major depression, major anxiety disorder, severe anger issues, and the lingering remnants of Attention Deficit Disorder. I also suffer from intrusive, horrific mental images. Since Equestria doesn't have modern psych meds, if I'm not at least two beers drunk, all that stuff preys on my mental health. And if I AM two beers drunk, I'm mildly mentally impaired, because my alcohol tolerance means I need at least 8% abv. So I have to balance sobriety with the need to be at least somewhat functional every damn day."
>Pinkie makes a whining noise.
"Don't feel bad, Pinkie, there's nothing you can do about it. Some of it's gotten better as I age. I can actually have sex now without getting a horror-show inside my head half the time, and I'm only filled with screaming berserker rage a few times a week..."
>Pinkie makes the whining noise again, rather louder, and her hair starts deflating.
"No, seriously, Equestria's a vast improvement over my previous existence. As a ward of the state, I have time to do the things that I enjoy doing. Besides, selling technology to the Crown for reverse engineering made me enough to afford a nice house and twenty acres on the edge of Whitetail Woods and live a life of leisure. Shame the deer here are sapient..."
>Now Ponka Po makes a gagging noise.
"Omnivore. Can't help it. Eggs, fish, and pork do the job, but sometimes I crave really red meat, so rare that it's still cool in the center..."
>An organic splattering sound snaps you out of your gory reverie.
>Huh. Ponk had donuts for breakfast. Or possibly lunch.
>Also, you're going to have to mop your kitchen floor.
"Sorry. Yeah, I'll talk to Nonny for you."
>"YAY! So when's the intervention?"
>You look at your watch.
"Well, it's after noon, so...no time like the present. Let me clean the floor up first, though."
>You blot up the vomit, throw the ruined towel in the trash, throw the trash bag in the main garbage can before the puke can eat through it, and mop the lingering dregs up.
>Pinkie helped.
>Then you have another beer before going to confront Anonmare.
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>Several hours later, it's not going well.
>"Bullshit. You're tall and you're not ugly as shit, you're rolling in pussy."
"You'd fucking think so, wouldn't you? I haven't had sex since I got here last year, and I wasn't doing any too well before that."
>"You're a fucking liar, you are. I've heard mares talking about how they want to feel your cum running down their legs."
"Just because they want to fuck me, that doesn't mean the feeling's mutual. I mean, I wouldn't stick my dick in Cloud Kicker if she paid me, and you'd have to physically drag me into contact with Rainbow Dash's filthy fucking fetid cunt. None of the mares that I'm interested in find me attractive -- or if they do, they're not compatible with me."
>"Bull-fucking-shit, Yank."
"Really, ya limey bastard? Moondancer's asexual, Octavia finds my ape form repulsive, Inky Rose and Lightning Dust both think I'm too fat, Vinyl's a junkie, Limestone Pie turned out to be too goddamn surly even for me, Delta Vee doesn't want any more kids because her shithead ex-husband knocked her up at the worst possible time and ruined her life, and Coco Pommel's obsessed with anal. If I wanted my sex life to consist of fucking someone in the ass regularly, I could have stayed on Earth. Always having to wash your dick after sex gets tiresome after a while.."
>"Faggot. Also, you are fat. You have a gut the size of mine."
"Hey, I won't pretend to be the world's strongest or fastest man, but I bench 225 for sets and I jog four days a week. There's some muscle under here. If I can quit fucking drinking, it'll be more visible."
>You grab Nonny's hoof and push it against your belly in a couple places. In each spot, her hoof sinks into your body fat a little and then stops against your abs.
>You don't notice the slight blush on Nonny's face as you do this.
>Then you poke her stomach, and your finger sinks in all the way to your last knuckle.
"I think I've made my point. Look, I'm speaking as a depressed wreck myself. Lying around won't do anything except make you feel worse."
>You poke her again.
"Come on, come for a walk with me. It's a beautiful day outside.
>"No. Why don't you stay in here with me instead?"
>She stretches, arching her back and spreading her legs to expose herself.
>Well, you do kind of like her.
>"Wait, what?"
>You pounce on Anonmare and bury your tongue in her mouth.
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>Sometime later...

>"Gah! Fuck, you're hitting my cervix!"
"I can't tell if you're complaining or enjoying it."
>"Both. It hurts so good."
>Nonny's flabby cottage-cheese ass cheeks...well, they don't actually clap against your hips as you fuck her. They just kind of squish.
>You're reminded of an ex-girlfriend.
>Except Nonny can probably be trusted not to choose her social life over her lover.
>Goddammit, Megan.
>"Anon? Are you okay?"
>You shake the bad memories off and resume plowing the green mare's sopping trench, smacking her ass occasionally.
>Eventually, Nonny's cervix gives way as you jackhammer it.
>She screams and clenches in mingled agony and ecstasy, as the last inch of your dick sinks into her womb.
>You feel the tension inside you building as you reach your own peak, and the tempo of your hand slapping her squishy ass speeds up.
>Normally, you're not much for dirty talk -- you'd rather save your breath for thrusting -- but this time, you find the energy somehow.
"That's it, you adorable nerd, have my kids!"
>"Yes! Give it to me!"
"Your womb is mine!"
"Your heart is mine!"
"Your soul is mine!"
"Have my satyr babies!"
>Anonmare's face twists in what you expect to be a final scream of ecstasy.
>You're wrong.
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>You came hard at the last, when her inner muscles did their best to wring you dry, but that piercing fucking screech honestly took most of the enjoyment out of it.
>Instead of the primal satisfaction of impregnating someone, you just have tinnitus.
>"You have shit taste in kids, you faggot."
"Well, you're going to be carrying them, so you better get used to it right quick."
>She draws in a deep breath and you fix her with your best death glare.
"Don't you dare fucking scream again. Use your words instead."
>"Satyrs are shit. Human boys and fillies are the ideal offspring."
>You bite her shoulder gently.
"That's an acceptable alternative. See, was that so hard?"
>"C-could you do that again, please?"
"What, talk things out like reasonable individuals?"
>"No, jackass, bite me again!"
>You get a mouthful of shoulder and bite, less gently.
>Things go on lewdly from there.



I ain't dead. Just busy as hell.
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Oh, and if anyone crossposts this to /ptfg/, I will find you and do horrible things to you.

You people are fucked up.
>Writes /ptf/
>We're the fucked ones
The fact that it was uploaded today by a guest with a very generic title is a dead giveaway that it's just some retard.
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>>Poor Cockney bastard got turned into a mare by whatever force sent him to Equus.
Stopped reading right there. Get this gay gender bending bullshit out of here, this thread is stallion Anon territory and not a place for you to push your gay trans fetish.
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Somebody failed reading comprehension in school, I see.
Who knows. The site is huge, so you could spend untold amounts of time looking around. If only someone had invented some way to search through sites, perhaps some sort of field or bar you could fill out with the terms you want to search for. But nah, that's too space aged. Searching a website. It's crazy talk.
Love anonmare. Hate satyrs, hate pregnancies. Simple as.
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Anytime someone brings this shit up, it's to normalize/desensitize people to the idea of being a mare/filly/women. Even if it's stated as something the character doesn't want, it's a poor defense meant to cover up their fetish, the Anonfilly threads are a good example of this in action Anon.
> selling technology to the Crown for reverse engineering
Anon is lucky he is male, because he basically scammed the crown, since they have pretty much no chance reverse engineering modern nano-scale tech.
I mean, it's a shitpost so good job on staying true to form i guess?

Exposed and btfo
>sailing expedition finds the lost island of Adonia
>mares expect to find tall, handsome stallions, fit and battle hardened
>instead they find anon, a shipwrecked goblin-tier manlet who yells at them and makes threatening gestures with a pointed stick
>they think he's an adorable little shortstack after being on the high sea for so long
>when the ship returns to make berth at [insert seaside harbor town here], the docks are overwhelmed by waves of little green thieves and their panicking mothers
>anon sits upon his makeshift throne in the ship's larder (three crates flanking a sack of oats)
>heavy is the head that it ain't easy being green
alright, prompt over
The implication being that Anon impregnated the lot of them during the voyage, which was long enough for them to all give birth on the sip before docking.
My biggest question is abut food rations. I doubt they packed enough to feed dozens of pregnant mares through their pregnancy, or to feed the foals once they were weened off of their mothers' milk.
If the foals were omnivores, they could at lest fish, I'll give you that, but this plot still smells fishy.
Trans have a self mutilation compulsion. Didn't any self mutilation in that.
Giving up your humanity is self-mutilation.
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Damn, shoulda learned that before I started eating FOUR SCOOPS
There's nothing saying they never stopped on their way back to resupply, after all, it is an exploratory expedition. Those tended to be quite a lengthy affair, between arrival at their destination and the subsequent return voyage
The closest you ever come to a deadlift is sitting your fat ass down on the toilet and getting up again afterward
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a green about 2 anons, one of which gets turned into a stallion and then seeing how they each interact with this new world would be a lot more interesting than trannynon mare getting fucked by normal anon because muh sex
Wrong guy pal, I’m not the tranon. I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity.
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oh look, actual thread related content. what a fucking rarity around these parts.
Goddamn Anon living the good life, or in other words, god I wish that were me. Oh well.
Goddamn Satyrfag is at it again. Happy to see you still alive and kicking, you bastard! On that note, Anon is a fag. Please continue.
I'm reading through the prompt bins, and this thread had some really creative ideas in the past that never really caught on. Going by that enormous bin of greentext suggestions, what was your favorite prompt (or concept introduced in a prompt) that you wished had found a foothold and gotten more attention?

Pic related, it's a comic about one of LaP's siren greentexts that never continued past this point. If it had continued, it would have illustrated a very sappy scene where Anon explains to a crowd of people that the reason he's happy to go down on the sirens (specifically without being coerced, or doing it as part of a bargain/deal) is because he loves them.
>never continued past this point
My guy, that was only part 7 out of 12. And said part does contain him addressing the crowd.
7 specifically was scrubbed by pastebin, but as per usual, you can use ponebin.
Sorry, I phrased that poorly. The story continued well past this point, but the illustration is only 2 pages. My bad.
Ah, fair enough. At the very least it got me to see that it was purged and needs to be reposted somewhere other than a domain change pastebin mirror. That and I believe the one where Sonata fucks Anon in the library.
Moon ponies, and the "dream pony" variant of the prompt.
The latter had the cute interaction of Twilight and her literal dream coltfriend.
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I miss moonponies. Those were a really fun couple threads of worldbuilding autism.
reminds me of when /hhh/ was still around and anons had to keep that shit out
Each and every anon in these stories all exist in the same equestria
But are split between Those who love Rgrequestria for the constant sex, and those who are very fucking aware that shit ain't right and are trying to reright the ship before it crashes into the proverbial Iceberg
Yea that was cute, was that stuff ever binned?
Agreed. Tranny shit out.
I'll never understand the hatred for Anonfilly. I think its a neat concept, in the right circumstances. Fish out of water ontop of fish out of water.
I think you're in the wrong general and you should leave.
>genderbending transformation
The only transformation that is acceptable is when Anon's cock is magically superpowered and he is turned into a demigod pussy slaying gigachad. The rest can gtfo.
A fetish is a fetish Anon, no matter how much you try to sugarcoat it or justify it with "muh magic". Fags like you that come form /ptfg/ all have the same mindset as trannies. What I mean by this is when a tranny looks at a woman they see her as cute and attractive, than they want to be the woman so men would find them attractive, if for no other reason than to be fucked by said men. You Anonfilly/Anonmare fags are no different in this regard.
Man, I hate weather. A week of constant, mind-numbing headaches, disallowing me to write. Thankfully it's over, for now at least. So, Birbfilly hour is back! This time taking the perspective of a not so commonly seen character. I hope the contents of the chapter are acceptable!
Ponepaste: https://ponepaste.org/7252


>Be just so relieved.
>It’s been /weeks/ since you could just stop for a moment and relax.
>Deal with mountains of paperwork, oversee the training of the recruits, manage the holidays of the veterans, go to the therapy with Spitfire, it sure is busy being Soarin’ right now!
>Because of course you are him and he is you.
>You let out a tired groan, your mind is starting to make you think of funny but stupid things, now that you can finally allow yourself to just…
>Yes, that’s the right word.
>Even though you are flying, as you think all of this.
>Summer hadn’t seen you in weeks, and while you are more than certain that Spitfire, Anon and Bon Bon could take care of her without any trouble, yes Lyra that means you, you would still like to see your daughter.
>Spending so much time apart also means that you should bring some kind of a present for your little precious, you rationalize, something that will develop a feeling of anticipation in her every time she sees you.
>This is… well, it’s not entirely healthy, but it’s the best thing you can do.
>Wait, scratch that, it /is/ healthy, since she has her loving and very much caring mother and father already, making you and Spitfire her secondary set of parents that can spoil her as you see fit!
>Oh yeah, it’s all coming together.
>Speaking of.
>You have just arrived!
>Gently landing in front of the store, you look up at the big letters, proudly presenting the main title the shop sells: Hyperspace Hyperwars!
>You always wanted to collect and paint these miniatures, but always were told by literally everypony that they are too fillyish for a colt.
>After you joined the Wonderbolts ranks and had a military exercise with the then Lieutenant Shining Armor, you found out that he was, in fact, a proud collector of HH, owner of multiple armies, and two time champion of the official tournament.
>You silently seethed, but settled with admiring the stallion, wishing that you had the chance to be like him.
>But alas.
>Through Summer you can, finally, get into HH and share this hobby with your daughter, without anypony to tell you otherwise!
>Thus, you enter the store.
>Within the stuffy atmosphere collides with you like a stormfront, but it’s nothing you haven’t felt or had to experience /daily/, for months on end.
>The store clerk, a surprisingly thin looking mare, seems to be too busy with the miniature she’s painting to respond to a customer’s arrival.
>No, actually, she has her ears aimed at you, so she is aware of your presence.

>You can see immense focus on her face, better not bother her until she’s done with the difficult parts.
“I will be looking around.” You simply and relatively quietly tell her.
>That should do it.
>In response you only get a grunt in the affirmative.
>Despite the place being quite roomy, it is filled to the brim with shelves upon shelves of boxes, some looking positively ancient.
>Their price tag tells you the reason for this strange phenomena, some are so expensive that even you would need to think twice before buying!
>No matter, you are here for a starter set, maybe two, and the tools one needs to actually paint them.
>Soon enough you spot what you are looking for.
>On a well lit shelf there are neatly stacked boxes marked as ‘starter kit’ and ‘conversion kit’.
>...Do ponies say ‘bingo’ nowadays?
>Shaking that thought from your head, you take a closer look at the various boxes.
>There are plenty of colors and styles, you are only familiar with a hoofful of them, unfortunately.
>Luckily you have done your research.
>And by ‘research’ you mean that you have sent a letter to Shining Armor to ask which of the HH armies is focused on speed and mobility and to excuse your ignorance.
>His answer was more rapid than you expected, arriving on the very next day.
>White Ravens is the name apparently, the color pattern is red and black on a white base.
>Easy to spot, especially for someone with your sight.
>Cautiously pulling out a box from the stacks, you turn it around and take a better look at it.
>Holding it with your dexterous wings allows you to rotate the box as you wish, quickly leading you to find that it is, indeed exactly what you have been looking for.
>Their conversion kit, but that’s besides the point.
>Putting the box on your back, you grab a base kit and then start looking for the paints and tools.
>You already know that Anon will have a field day with the tiny pieces, you got this idea from him, after all.
>This is the moment when the store clerk - owner, maybe? - decides to step in.
>Staring at the various paints and chuckling to yourself is apparently some kind of a slight?
>”May I help you?” She asks you, her voice gruff and raspy.
>Take a cough drop, filly!
“Well, yes. I am looking for the paints for this White Ravens conversion. My daughter’s first set, but she will have plenty of help with the assembly and painting.” You explain yourself, putting on the confidence the years and experience gave you in the Wonderbolts.
>The eyebrows of the clerk assume a rather confused but nonetheless pleased position on her forehead.
>”This, this and this.” She grumbles, picking up three small cans of paint from the shelf, hovering them in front of you with her magic.
>Huh, right, she’s a unicorn, you didn’t even see her horn.
>Maybe that’s why she’s the owner of this store?

>Forcing yourself to not smirk, you simply nod and point at your back with a wing.
“Over there will do.” You add, making it obvious for the mare where to palace the paint cans.
>Another grumble and the cans land on top of the two boxes.
“I will need the proper tools to extract the pieces from the cast, as well as some brushes, if you don’t mind.”
>Your request is welcomed with a barely noticeable nod as the mare moves away from you, towards a different shelf.
>Little clippers, scissors and other tools are added to the pile, followed by brushes of various sizes.
>”Should be plenty enough for a starter kit.” The mare grumbles, but even you can make out that she’s pleased with the amount of items she’s selling you.
>Or your attitude?
>”Would that be all?” Is her next question, which she asks as she’s making her way back to the cash register.
“No, actually.” You reply, furrowing your eyebrows. “I don’t know when will be the next time I could buy something for her, I’m rather busy after all, so I would also like to buy one of the vehicle sets, for the White Ravens of course. Jetbikes would be preferable.” Thank you Shining for explaining this in detail, otherwise you would look like an idiot right now. “Also the White Ravens Codex.”
>The clerk mare nods, this time with more enthusiasm.
>”With all the extra paint?” She asks, raising an eyebrow.
“Everything necessary. Money is not a problem.” You answer.
>/That/ will surely get her attention!
>Like clockwork, the mare’s eyes go wide, even if just for a moment.
>”Yes, M’Lord!” She nods, now rather enthusiastically.
>In the span of a few seconds she puts together a package, with all the necessary tools and accessories needed for a perfect gift-pack, book included.
>”Do you also want them gift-wrapped, separately?” She asks, cracking a smile.
“Yes, that would be lovely.” You reply, returning the smile.
>Poor mare, this must have been the most male attention she got for years, you realize.
>Well, might as well make it more memorable for her, why the heck not?
“Thank you kindly for the help and care, Miss…?” You leave the question open, looking at her pointedly.
>Uh, oh, oh, I’m Paint Smear, at your service… you are Soarin’, right?” She introduces herself and asks, making you cringe internally.
>No, don’t ruin it for her, she really did help.
“The one and only.” You respond, putting on your award winning smile.
>Paint Smear positively beams at that, her pupils going wide as she looks you over.
>The poor thing.
“So, how much will it be?” You ask, deciding to break the rapidly onsetting awkward silence.
>”Oh! Right, right, the paints, the tools, brushes, the starter… hmm…” She mutters as she’s punching in the various numbers into the cash register. “Fourhundred and twenty one bits.” For some reason she looks disappointed.
It depends. Scars, maybe. How often have you seen homeless people with missing limbs sitting on sidewalks with signs saying stuff like "homeless veteran", though? Or read stories about how they're often treated either like trash or dangerous animals? I've never sought out that content, but came across plenty of things like that while trawling through the internet. It's vile.
Fuck it. Fuck you, and I guess fuck me as well. Don't know if it's the wine I had or the lack of sleep, but I'm doing this. Here goes.

>Be Anon, the local interdimensional alien.
>That title would usually conjure images of secret government labs, sadistic scientists, horrifying experiments and men in suits interrogating you.
>Not a rather normal-looking bar filled with colorful ponies.
>The pony part is the only odd thing about the bar. Odd for you, anyway, seeing as ponies are the local dominant sapient lifeform.
>In this country, at least. Other countries apparently have lots more sapient species.
>You see a few now and then as you're going on your walks, but that's it. Ponies are the majority.
>Nice people, for the most part.
>They didn't lock you up to experiment on you or anything like that.
>Well, they did, but only temporarily, and it was to see if you were carrying any diseases that might be dangerous to them.
>Just a quarantine and a bunch of blood/urine/stool/spit/hair samples and medical checkups.
>No anal probes, thank goodness.
>Ass status: still exit only.
>The fact that there's lots of other sapient species probably was the likeliest reason they didn't freak out more.
>After some weird magical experiments, they determined that they wouldn't be able to send you home.
>You disbelieved the "magic" at first, but it took about five seconds of seeing them casually violating the laws of physics left and right to accept that this world worked differently.
>After a while of telling them what you know, trading a few gadgets like your digital watch to their scientists and learning some social customs, you were released.
>They paid you well, you were able to afford rent for at least a year ahead.
>Plenty of time to find a job and get situated.
>The social customs, though...
>It was like some kind of parody.
>Their society was immensely like the human one on Earth, except with the gender roles flipped upside down.
>With most ponies of both genders acting more like overdone stereotypes you'd see on TV rather than real people.
>Whiny, bitchy, bratty, weak stallions that the basedboys at home would be proud of.
>"Marely" mares that acted more like a bunch of frat boys than any man that you knew in real life.
>It took you a while to really get it.
>For better or for worse, despite being an alien, you were immediately labeled as a "stallion".
>Better, because that meant you managed to sort of immediately slide into their society, without the months/years of social ostracizing and proving you're a decent person or whatever.

“Very well.” You reply, grabbing your purse to pay. “Are you a fan of mine, by any chance?” Is your question then, and as expected, it takes her by surprise.
>”Y-yes?” She nods cautiously, blinking rapidly as if she was caught trespassing.
“Fantastic! Since you were so kind, I would like to repay you with a little something.” You tell her and take your autograph-giving notebook from your purse, quickly penning down a few words on it before tearing out the page and giving it to her.
>Paint Smear’s eyes go really wide, which looks rather funny on her scrawny build, but you keep your mirth to yourself.
>”Protect the smile of the innocent, as the Empress Protects all! Soarin’” She reads the autograph aloud, gaining a foal-like grin. “That’s from the Dragons!”
>You nod knowingly.
>Thank Celestia you remembered one of the legion mottos, phew.
“Here you go.” You say as you pay her a generous five hundred bits. “I hope to see you soon, Paint, your store is great!” You tell her as you grab the boxes, now conveniently placed in a sturdy paper bag that Paint Smear produced from under the counter.
>”T-thank you! See you soon!” She stammers, clearly almost unable to contain her joy.
>It’s the little things that count, you think to yourself as you head outside.
>Not sooner than you close the door behind you, you hear Paint let out a rather coltish scream of joy.
>You made her day.
>Wait, no, you made her whole week.
>With a smile on your face you take off, heading towards Ponyville.


>The trip to the quaint village is spent thinking about how you wish it could be you to always spend time with Summer, enjoying the miniature building, painting and playing with them.
>This, thankfully, allows you to arrive without getting bored, and as you land in front of the door of Anon’s oversized home, you feel joy dwelling up in your chest.
>From the other side you can hear Summer’s laughter.
>Knocking on the door you are welcomed with Anon’s yell.
>”In a moment!”
>Putting on your best smile, you look up, expecting the large man to appear in the door.
>Instead you come face to face with him as the door opens.
>Apparently he’s on all fours, with Summer on his back.
>He’s giving her a ponyback ride?
>”Oh hey, Soarin’! Long time no see, is everything alright?” He asks you, noticing the paper bag by your side.
“Just the usual, you know. Work. But I have some free time now!” You reply, your gaze moving at Summer.
>Your daughter, now realizing that it’s you who is standing in the door, joyfully exclaims.
>”Papa Soarin’!” Like lightning, she is off of Anon and zips around you!
“Whoa-whoa, easy there, champ!” You call out, actually getting her to slow down.
>No, she doesn’t stop, but her flight is much more reigned in.
>You share a look with Anon, yours telling him your thoughts: ‘Impressive!’

>”Whassin the bag?” Summer asks, the paper bag not avoiding her attention.
>Good, she should be at least this, if not more perceptive.
“I have a present for you, sweetie pie!” Is your reply.
>Her immediate, explosive joy sticks to you, you can’t help but smile as you watch her fly around you with newfound strength, very clearly hyped because of the prospect of a present.
“Come on, let’s get inside so you can open it, alright?” You ask her, prompting Anon to stand up and allow you into his house.
>A minute later the three of you are sitting by the table.
>Of course Summer is not actually sitting by it, but that doesn’t matter.
>Ripping the wrapping away, the boxes, paints and tools are revealed, quickly earning an awed ‘ooh’ from both Anon and Summer.
“I would like to introduce you to the world of Hyperspace Hyperwars, Summer. These Mares…” You point at the box art of the white armor clad Space Mareines, “...are of the White Ravens Legion! They are flying and they are fast, just like you!” You explain, instantly earning an excited gasp from Summer. “But these are not just toys, oh no, they are much more than that!” You wiggle your eyebrows at her, making her giggle. “We will put them together and paint them, shiny and white, like in the pictures!”
>Summer’s excited expression changes, gaining a mixture of wonder, awe and determination.
>”Paint? That’s hard?” She asks you, glancing up at Anon with an unsure expression.
“It’s only as hard as you make it to be, sweetheart. Besides, your dad and I will be here to help, isn’t that right, Anon?” You reply, looking at the aforementioned man.
>”Oh yeah, I love this stuff!” He replies quite enthusiastically, washing away Summer’s doubts.
>”Yay, less do it!” She cheers, grabbing and shaking the box of the conversion kit.
>While she’s busy you lean back and motion for Anon to lean close to you.
“I have a second present ready for her, but that’s for next time, can you hide it somewhere?” You ask him in a barely audible whisper.
>He nods in reply, needing no words to confirm but you can see on him that he’s quite happy with this news..
>The issue settled, you put your attention on Summer and on opening the boxes.
>Today it’s not just Summer who feels child-like joy, and it’s the best gift one can get, you realize.


And that's all for now, longer than usual to make up for the time I wasted. Inspired by the new totally-not-XCOM 40K game.
>Worse, because: a) Everyone expected you to act like the most annoying kind of woman you have seen on Earth. Ugh.
>b) The mares were also after your ass.
>Still no anal probes, fortunately
>It didn't even make sense!
>The stallions still were the ones that mounted the mares, so what did mares care about what a stallion's ass is like?
>Didn't stop them with smacking yours with their damn hard hooves now and then.
>Or "accidentally" running into you when they figured out that your crotch was generally at their face level.
>They drove you to drink.
>You didn't turn into an alcoholic or anything remotely like that, but you still frequented drinking establishments a little more often than you used to.
>Getting free drinks now and then was nice, though they were often some kind of horrifyingly girly cocktails.
>Or "colty", as they call them here.
>True to the frat boy nature of the mares buying you drinks, they were also often laced with something.
>Fortunately, none of their magical date-rape drugs worked on you.
>They'd either go right through you, or just make you a little more buzzed.
>One time, you could have sworn the mares just emptied a whole shaker of salt into your drink.
>What the hell was that even supposed to achieve? Raise your blood pressure?
>Busting them or downing a dozen fruity drinks without getting affected at all and walking away with a laugh was hilarious.
>It was funny for a time, but since you went to bars to get away from that crap, you kept looking for new ones.
>Eventually, you found an out of the way kind of place.
>It was semi-hidden and a bit hard to find, but it was actually really great.
>Not a seedy dive bar on the outskirts, but more of a hangout place for the local police/military to get a pint at after work.
>A guardsmare recommended it to you after you actually got into a fight with some mares.
>You drank some three hundred bit's worth of fancy-ass cocktails, ones that they kept spiking more and more frantically.
>In the end, you laughed at them, told them to go fuck themselves, and tried to leave.
>They had a bunch of drinks too, though, and were sloshed enough to "not care about hitting a smartflank stallion".
>You ended up beating the crap out of four of them, with two more running away.
>That was a fun night.
>The guards didn't believe you, of course, but there were a couple dozen witnesses.
>Not that they thought you were the aggressor, but they couldn't believe that a "stallion" would not only pick a fight with some mares, but also do something more than sissy-slap them.
>After you explained the situation and the constant drugging attempts, one guardsmare told you that you should visit her haunt, instead.
"Almost no one but active and retired guardsmares go there," she explained. "No guarantees that you won't be hit on, but anyone trying to drug a colt there would get pony-piled and knocked out faster than they could blink."
blessed instigator of cute birb pony, good to see more
>guardsmare bar where most patrons are more tired and chill than horny and drunk
sounds pretty nice desu
>I'll never understand the hatred for Anonfilly.
Because it is a concept where Anon, a male self-insert character, gets turned not only into a pony, and not only into a mare, but also into a tiny baby pony. Species transformation, gender transformation, and age transformation. So right from the get go there are 3 things that tend to be a hard sell even on their own. The concept of Anonfilly itself could be possible to salvage with a lot of work. Except that it attracts a crowd that loves stories where they get to self-insert as (finally) being a little girl. And those people are in the thread to jerk off, not to write greentext dealing with some philosophical concept, or seeing society from a different perspective, or some other non-fetishy angle you could attach to Anonfilly (on paper, anyway). I know this because I've seen an Anonfilly thread in the past, and there wasn't a lot of discussion that didn't involve dudes fucking Anonfilly. And if all that weren't enough, the crowd it appeals to tend to be in denial about how gay it is for two men to have sex, even if one is metaphorically wearing a dress and makeup. In the end, the thread would be flooded by closeted faggots more interested in cooming than talking about the thread topic. Exploring the concept might work on another site if it approached it with strict moderation to keep it purely a discussion about the concept, but a site like 4chan would only produce fetish discussion and shitposters. And personally I think the concept is creepy as hell. "I want to be a little girl and have sex with all the boys, something something rgre".
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>it's fucking Smol
Finally, I can get my fix
I want a green where a really sexist mare who's constantly bothering Anon because he's a hot, exotic male, gets turned into a male human, and Anon is tasked with taking care of her for a time while twilight works on fixing it.
Kind of a story where she learns what Anon has to go through and getting a taste of her own medicine.
When she gets turned back into a mare, and she now understands what it's like to constantly be hit on and asked out, she gives Anon a sad smile and farewell, promising not to bother him any more, but is halted when Anon asks her out on a date instead.
>make sand my wich
Don't dead open inside
>It was called The Palisade.
>It turned out to be a nice place.
>You got lots and LOTS of looks, some whistles and comments about your legs, but the mares there at least knew the "look, don't touch" rule.
>And were disciplined enough to actually follow it.
>You were fine with that.
>That's where you were right now, having an ale.
>That brought a smile to your face, and not just because it was good.
>When you approached the bartender the first time you came there, she politely told you "Sorry darling, but I don't think we have the kind of stuff you'd like here."
>You scoffed and told her to speak for herself, and go gargle cocktails if she wanted to.
>Then you asked for the darkest, most bitter ale that they had.
>That earned you some raised eyebrows and a slightly open mouth.
>The barmare was clearly and old hand (hoof?) at it, though.
>After a second of recovery, she shrugged, and poured you a mug, though she watched you very intently as you examined it.
>It was a lovely dark color with a nice foam.
>You took a sip, then downed half of it in one go. It was good. Real good.
"That was great. I'll take another, please," you asked with a smile.
>This time, the barmare couldn't hide her shock.
>A bunch of the patrons behind you started whispering, as well.
>You chuckled as you took your second mug from the flabbergasted mare and went to find a seat.
>That was a fun memory.
>So here you were, sprawled out on one of the short, pony-height chairs, enjoying a drink after a long day.
>The furniture was one of the few small annoyances about Equestria.
>Overall, you weren't all that much bigger than the average pony, but you were far taller.
>Which meant that you had to splay your legs out awkwardly every time you sat down, sometimes reaching under other pony's chairs.
>The mares didn't mind. At all. They did the opposite of minding it as they openly ogled your legs.
>Long legs was a thing around here, apparently.
>Still, they did keep to themselves, though a few would "accidentally" drape their tails over your legs now and then.
>You didn't mind. Honestly, it was better than putting them on the floor. The ponies had some pretty nice tails.
>Overall, you could sit there calmly without having to watch your drink for any levitating pills getting tossed into it, or getting crude comments about your balls.
>The only mare you really talked to here so far was the one who told you about the bar.
>To your surprise, she didn't try hitting on you.
>She already had a "herd", apparently.
>Another quirk of their culture. The males were born less often than the females, which probably led to them being the coddled gender.
>Which also meant that families were often made of mini-harems of multiple mares per stallion.
>So it came as a slight surprise to you when when a few mares approached you.
>"Darn... My regular seat's taken... And what *is* that creature?"
>Because it is a concept where Anon, a male self-insert character, gets turned not only into a pony, and not only into a mare, but also into a tiny baby pony. Species transformation, gender transformation, and age transformation.
I can think of one way to avoid two out of three problems.
Dadnon and Daughteru end up innaquestria together, and tiny target audience girl turns into filly.
There's an obvious solution to the problem: put transformation shit in a general for transformation.
Why are you talking to yourself?
Because we can only have epic funny green monkey stories and nothing more
This seems interesting
Do go on,anon

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>Go to the gym one day
>Another day, another deadlift
>The usual villains are there, working on their physical fitness
>Them, and two others
>There was a woman
>Muscular, with a weird haircut, but nothing really noteworthy
>The other one, however was a horse
>A weird, colorful, small horse
>It was with this woman, doing it's best to work out
>You went and asked the gyms owner, Dave, why the fuck there was a little horse running around
>He said the horse wanted to lift, and he wasn't gonna turn anyone away
>Besides, he said, that little horse could talk
>It called him sugar nuts and slapped his ass with a tiny hoof before telling him to make it a sandwich
>The horse was now currently attempting to bench press a plastic tube people used to stretch with
>It was struggling, though everyone watching could see it was doing its best
>Just another day at the gym you guessed
>You've only been coming here a couple weeks.
>You assumed that the regulars would eventually start talking you up.
>They were certainly sizing you up more often instead of acting shocked by your "janefilly" behavior as you came in lately.
>This didn't sound like it, though.
>You turn towards the voice.
>It takes you a few seconds to process the sight.
>Three mares are standing in front of your table.
>They're an unusual sight, though. You've almost never seen ponies like them.
>One pegasus, her entire left side scarred, and with nothing but a stump for a wing.
>Looks like burns of some kind, but how did she get burned so evenly?
>One unicorn, her horn broken halfway, standing in a slightly crooked fashion.
>Leg injury?
>And an earth pony... With both her hindlegs missing.
>She's riding around with her rump in a mini-cart of sorts.
"Yes? Can I help you, ladies?"
>That gives them pause.
>Ponies tend to be confused when they see you at first, but that tends to disappear the second you open your mouth.
>You have a relatively deep voice, which immediately identifies you as a "stallion" to them.
>The earth pony folds her ears.
>"That's fine, it's nothing. Just, it's a little hard to find space for... Nevermind, sir, enjoy your evening."
"Hold up."
>It only takes a second to figure it out.
>The table you've taken is in a corner, near a support beam.
>The beam makes it so that there's no space for another table, but enough extra room to stretch your legs out comfortably from your chair.
>You assume the earth mare with the cart needs some extra space, too.
"Come on, you can have the seat. I don't want you to have to run around looking for some space. I can sit anywhere else."
>They're a little taken aback by this.
>The pegasus, who was checking out your legs, raises her eyes in surprise.
>The unicorn raises an eyebrow.
>The earth pony speaks again.
>"Really? Are you sure? We're just here for a drink. I don't want to sit next to a silently resentful passive-aggressive stallion all evening. Uh, I mean..."
>You narrow your eyes as she stammers a bit.
>That kind of comment is exactly what you go here to get away from.
>After months of things like that, you were getting more than a little annoyed.
>Fortunately, you figured out ways to get back at the mares without doing anything violent or stupid.
"And I don't want to sit next to a smarta- smartflank meathead mare all evening. So how about we both behave like civilized people, and we won't have to sit next to people we don't want to?"
>"Ummm... okay...?"
"In fact, I have an even better idea. Come here..."
>You reach out with your arms and gently, but firmly grab the mare by the forelegs.
>Her eyes become wide as saucers.
>"Wait, what are you-"
>Since she has no leverage on her back side, pulling her by the forelegs makes the cart roll forward towards you.
>You carefully lift her from the cart.
>That makes the other two's eyes go wide as well.
>"Strong one," the unicorn mutters quietly
99% sure those stories are saved on /dzg/'s personal archive site, dunno why they opted to do that than use ponepaste
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It's recent.
Before the ban, Anonfilly threads were basically just "AiE, Dark Souls edition".
During the ban all writefags left (blame Discord, as usual), and now Anonfilly threads are staffed only by coomers and legit troons who only paid attention to the "(you) are a defenseless filly" part and don't care actually making it an interesting variant of AiE.
Not saying the faggots here *liked* Anonfilly before (any general will have a handful of rabid autists hating it no matter what), but post-ban Anonfilly threads have legit become everything pre-ban-threads' detractors accused it to be.

TLDR: Past filly is kill. New filly deserve the hate.
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understandable, thanks for explaining
It's unironically not RGRE at all. Did you mean to post this in the martial problems thread?
Meant marital, it's not martial at all either. Honestly, the only way it could be saved is if it turns out the story was some weird roleplaying thing Lyra roped her herdmates into.
I'm going on.

>You lift the mare and put her in the best seat in the house.
>Your lap.
>She's frozen stiff, not quite sure what is happening.
>Being "marehandled" by a stallion is a very unusual experience for mares, you found out.
>They tend to freeze up when you do that, which makes it funny.
"There. Now neither one of us has to sit NEXT to each other. You can sit right here in my lap."
>If you did this to a girl on Earth, she'd likely be screaming her head off by now.
>If the situation was reversed, tough...
>Yeah, you'd likely be as confused as the mare.
>"Lap..?" she mutters.
>It's not how pony's legs really work, so they don't have laps others can sit on.
"Yep, my anatomy's different, courtesy of being an alien. Get comfortable," You explain, reaching for your beer.
>The mares just stare at you in confusion for a full minute.
>Eventually, the pegasus mutters something.
>You swear you heard an "unf" in there.
>Looks like she figured out that your choice of sitting positions would be considered rather sexual, if you were a pony.
>You, however, possess the amazing, undefeatable power of PANTS!
>Which makes the situation lewd at worst.
>The earth pony wiggles around a little bit as she decides to follow your advice.
>Clearly, she's keeping up with some kind of physical therapy or exercises despite her missing legs, because she has some serious muscle in there.
>Unf indeed.
>"So, uh, girls..." She adresses her companions. "Go get me a drink? I don't think I'm going to be moving much this evening. I'm rather enjoying this seat."
>The two nod, going to the bar.
>You chuckle as you gently keep her stable with one had on her chest, while holding your mug with the other one.
>She bites her lip, before speaking.
>"So, look, I'm sorry about what I said. Honestly. Just had a long day, you know?"
"I can understand that. And I'm sorry for dragging you around like that. That was uncalled for, but I'm a little short on temper in regards to baseless sexist comments."
>"Base- no, nevermind."
"Heh. Too late. And yes, baseless. It might apply to your stallions, maybe. But I'm not a stallion, I'm a man. Same way a male griffon is a tercel, not a stallion. I'm a different species."
>"I guess? I heard gryphon males still act a lot like stallions, though..."
"I'm not even from this dimension," you shrug. "The very fabric of reality is different where I'm from. It's nice to be accepted as one of the ponies, but when you start to expect me to act exactly the same, it gets annoying."
>"Alien, huh..." She turns her neck to look at you more closely.
>"I think I heard about you. I thought you meant you were from really far away, but you're that guy that was in the papers a few months ago, right?"
"Yeah, I think I was the big story for a few weeks. I certainly talked to lots of reporters about it. I'm surprised it fizzled out so fast, honestly. An alien would be big news forever where I'm from."
powerful mare
I'm glad you decided to continue with this, it's pretty cozy so far. Doubly nice since it seems to coincide with other writers returning as well, truly a blessed day
bold digits btw
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you will never be a real mare
Forgot to reply to myself there.

>"Well, we saw some really weird manure in the last few years, so... Ponies are less surprised, I guess. Maybe if you turned out to be giant, or really weird looking, or something, the interest would have lasted longer.
>You shrug.
"Hooray for me, I guess," you muse, idly running your fingers through her chest fluff.
>Her breathing gets a little faster and her muscles tense for a moment.
>Her companions return, carrying several mugs on their backs.
>"Soo, uh... Who's your new friend there, Sab?" The pegasus asks.
>Sab? That's an odd name for a pony.
>"Oh, I haven't asked him his name yet,.. Or introduced myself," she grins sheepishly.
>"My name's Sabaton," she says.
>Now it makes more sense. You take a peek at her rear. It's an armored pony hoof.
>"My friends here are Sky River and Warden," she indicates the pegasus and the unicorn, respectively.
"Pleasure to meet you. My name's Anonymous, or just Anon for short."
>They share out their drinks. You notice that Warden doesn't use magic at all.
>A few minutes pass in silence as the mares take sips from their mugs.
>They're clearly interested in you, examining you from the corners of their eyes while attempting to appear aloof.
>It's not working very well.
>They don't seem to know where to start, though.
>Honestly, you don't either, so you just relax and decide to go with the flow.
>Eventually, Sky River speaks up,
>"So, that's... An interesting way to sit, Anon. Do stallions usually sit with mares on top where you're from?"
"Not... Exactly. Sometimes. Also, not really a stallion."
>Sabaton explains the whole "alien" thing while you take another swig of your drink.
>"So, if your people don't really usually do it either, why'd you grab Sabaton like that?"
"Just... Frustrated, I guess. Too many mares keep annoying me every day. She just happened to be the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak."
>Their expressions fall at hearing that.
"Relax, I'm not mad at her," You reassure them. "Just wanted to mess with her a bit."
>The unicorn frowns.
>"Are mares really putting you down all day long? I didn't think ponies in Canterlot were raised that badly..."
"Well, not really putting me down. More like telling me dumb things and to "act more like a stallion", slapping me on the rear, and making comments about my legs. And balls."
>Warden snorts into her drink, almost choking. The other two quickly raise their mugs in an attempt not to laugh.
>Sabaton speaks next.
>"Well, couldn't you just, y'know, explain things the same way you just did to us? That you're different from pony stallions?"
>You open your mouth, close it, then sit there, staring into the distance for a whole minute.
>The mares seem a little concerned.
"Huh. Oh, I tried. Believe me, I tried. But whenever, I start talking, the mare's eyes tend to glaze over in half a second, and they just start nodding automatically, repeating stuff like "That's nice, sweetie", "uh huh", "go on".
Neither is 3/4 of the stuff posted in here that anons ask for more of. What's your point?
He asked for thoughts, so I gave him some.
>Powerful mare, Universe-mare
>Person-mare, Person-mare
>Hit in the head with a rocking chair
>Lives her life wishing she weren't there
"While staring at my legs or trying to see through my pants, too. Or while running their tails along my crotch, or wrapping them around my legs and stroking them. You... Hm. You're probably the only mares outside the scientists and professors that interviewed me that I had a real conversation with. We've barely begun to talk, and this is already the longest conversation I had in weeks."
>The three mares all cringe a little.
>Warden rubs the back of her head sheepishly.
>"Well, uh.. Yeah, mares are... Well, they're mares, you know? We can't help what we are."
>You think that over.
"I don't think that's entirely right, since we're talking just fine. You're the nicest bunch of mares I met so far."
>They don't seem to take the compliment well, if their drooping ears are any indication. Odd.
"I honestly don't know what's the bigger insult there. The fact that they think I'm so dumb that I'm not going to notice they're not listening to me, or the fact that they think I'm not going to *hear* them discussing the best ways to "drag him and his sexy legs home, and teach him to behave like a proper stallion" and how "it'll be easy to rein him in with a firm hoof and guidance from a real mare".
>You take a long pull from your mug. It's almost empty at this point.
>The mare's eyes dart around uncomfortably, and they try to hide inside their mugs, if the way they're drinking is any indication.
>"Well, you see..." Warden begins.
"Yes, I do see," you interrupt. "We have a saying back home. "There's no smoke without a fire." So from my few interactions with your stallions, I already know that, mostly, they're about as airheaded as the mares make them out to be. It's a perfect match, really. If the mares were more sane, I'd be sorry for them, but as things stand, you all really deserve each other," you finish with a snort.
>"So, uh... Few interactions? You don't usually hang out with other stallions?" Cloud River asks.
>You make a face. A really, really disgusted face. She looks at you with confused expression.
"No. HELL no. If I stay around them any longer than strictly necessary, I won't resist the urge to smack them upside the head, and shout at them to man up and grow some balls already. Not that it even means anything to them. Argh."
>The three mares stare at you for a good long while, until Sabaton exclaims.
>"You really are an alien."
>You snort.
"No kidding. A thirsty alien. I'm going to need a refill. Do you mind if I get up?"
>The other two immediately get up,
>"No, no, we'll get you a drink," Warden says.
>"Yeah, we need a refill anyway. Be right back," Sky River adds.
>You shrug. Fine by you. Absentmindedly, you run your fingers through Sabaton's coat again, while playing with her mane.
>She tenses up again, but slowly leans into you.
>You notice her tense and wonder if you're doing anything inappropriate.
>Then you remember all the wildly inappropriate things mares say and do to you all the time.
>Yeah, this is nothing.
And I'm done for now. I'll continue this... At some point in the space-time continuum. See ya.
My first RGRE ever, so y'know, tear it down, tell me you hate it, all that good stuff. I need my (You)'s.
its good shit anon, i genuinely look forward to more of this kind of thing in the future
>Anon chuckles and reaches over, ruffling the girl's hair much to her chagrin as she tries to swat his hand away.
"Joking," he assures her. "Besides, who says you'll become a ghost, anyway? Reincarnation's always on the table."
>His smile becomes tired as he sighs and stands.
"Nothing. Come on, we've got work to do. Those toothpick limbs of yours aren't going to get any bigger with us just sitting around."
>"... You're a jerk, you know that, Anon?"
"What can I say, I try."
>Wallflower sighs herself, but stands and follows Anon.
>The rest of the workout is clearly hard on her tired body, but Anon makes sure to stay beside her every step of the way, catching her by the arm when she nearly toppled over and always offering words of encouragement.
>By the end of it, Anon can honestly say he's proud of Wallflower for not giving up, and even more so when she assures him with a smile, strained as it is from all the aches and pains, that she can't wait for their next workout session.
>She says this before quickly trying to shoo him away through the passenger side window of his car, thankful for the ride, but eager to see him gone before her dad, who had just stepped outside, could come over and likely embarrass his daughter.
>Anon merely smirks and says his own goodbye before pulling away, giving the man a wave through the window which is enthusiastically returned.
>As Anon drives home, he can honestly tell himself that he's looking forward to his next workout session with Wallflower, finding the simple, honest interactions with the girl refreshing after spending so much time surrounded by vapid chatter or girls trying to get into his pants.
>In truth, spending time with Wallflower is starting to become the highlight of his day, and-
"... Dammit, I'm starting to like her, aren't I?" he grumbles to himself, rubbing at the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Get yourself together, Anon. She's a teenager."
>Still, a part of his mind points out that compared to most of the kids he's forced to spend his time around, she's far more mature and not nearly as annoying, so maybe-
>Anon grunts and tightens his grip on the wheel, taking a sudden turn from the path to his house.
>He needs to clear his head, and he won't be able to do that sitting in his room.
>In search of a good place to park his car and get some fresh air, he ends up at the Gardens, walking the paths in silence as he contemplates what to do about the shy girl he's come to call a friend.

>Wallflower sits silently in the classroom as the teacher drones on about history, feeling herself begin to slump in her seat as her sore body seeks a more comfortable position to rest.
>As soon as she realizes this, however, she forces herself to sit up straight, pushing her shoulders back and keeping her head high.
>If Anon's right about correcting her posture being the key to fending off the neck pain she often suffers in the morning, then she's willing to give it a shot.
>tfw you will never meet a cute, sexist horse in a gym
Good work anon. I was so absorbed in the scene that when you suddenly ended i felt anxious for more. Doesn't need to be an epic or anything, just Anon's relationship with three little veteran mares. So don't stress yourself rushing an update, that's how a story is left as either a longform prompt or abandoned when the writer feels disgusted with posting something that writes them into a corner later.
And more Wallflower, another story that I am anxious to read more of. Glad to see it picked up once again.
If you would do it yourself and save me the trouble I would be much obliged.
I really like this anon, keep going pls
This is excellent stuff, my dude. If you really are a new writefren in the lands of the RGREEE thread then you have easily surpassed the expectations, especially as of lately. In other words, well done! A new point of view on the old idea, a more in-depth look, plenty of RGRE elements, I can hardly point out a problem so I won't. 5/7, wood reed again!
Yup yup. Never wrote anything here, total newfag too, only started lurking early 2021.
Everyone outside of 4chan keeps saying that this is the most horrible place ever (One person sent me a message that they, and I quote, "Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy" ("that" being hanging around in /mlp/). It brought a huge smile to my face and a kek to my heart.
Yet when I write stuff and make content, I get pretty much nothing but praise. Clearly, I must be doing something wrong.
You ever wonder if mares like Rainbow Dash could fly faster if they bothered to groom their wings more? Stallions have lots of products to make their feathers sleek and shiny. Some of them stiffen them up a bit (so that the colt can maintain the wing-perm, of course), too. Mares only really bathe when they need to, and Rainbow probably only preens her wings when the feathers start bothering her. If she investigated stallion's care products, she could wax the FUCK out of her wings and lower the drag coming from her feathers.
It's a cancerous meme.
Fucking amazing for a first rgre story. Good job.
I'm so glad this story is back. I really like the dynamic between ice King Anon and Wally. You shold make a ponepaste and move things over.
>Still, it's hard when Ms. Tome is speaking in such a monotone voice.
>Idly she glances over and sees Twilight Sparkle furiously taking notes, looking enraptured by the boring lesson about their country's founders.
>Refocusing on the teacher, Wallflower can at least admit it's kind of interesting to learn about how the expedition heads of three different countries eventually decided to settle the land as its own nation together.
>That took some serious ovaries, especially considering the backlash from their homelands.
>This Puddinghead lady sounded like someone she'd like to have a soda with.
>Trying her best to take notes, Wallflower nevertheless starts to feel antsy as the clock ticks ever closer to her the end of class and end of the school day.
>Besides being the start of the weekend, it's also her birthday tomorrow, which, while normally not a big deal, would mark the first in a while she actually has friends to care that Wallflower is turning one year older.
>She even had to talk Sunset out of having Pinkie organize a huge party for her at Sugarcube Corner.
>It's not like she hasn't had fantasies in the past about being the center of attention at a big social gathering like that, but the reality is that had such a thing occurred, most of the people attending would have just been there for free punch and snacks, and probably wouldn't have even known her.
>No, instead, Sunset, Pinkie, who insisted she be there and that she'd bring cookies as to not muscle in on Dad's territory of baking the birthday cake, and Anon will be coming over to her house to hangout and play some vidya.
>Sunset will be bringing the console and some games as the extent of Wallflower's gaming paraphernalia is an old GameGirl Advance she hasn't touched since catching all the creatures in Equinemon and some clicker games on her phone.
>It might sound like the most boring eighteenth birthday party in history, but she's just glad not be alone and to have people to actually celebrate with other than her parents.
>When the bell rings, she's up and out of class, quickly going to her locker and collecting her things.
>Anon told her to just do some light exercises at home to work her upper body, showing her a quick and easy routine she could do without equipment.
>He said he doesn't want her stiff and in pain for her birthday, and so she won't be getting to hangout with him after school like she has been.
>Even so, she finds herself standing at the edge of the hall, looking towards his locker to see him grabbing his things, surrounded by his clique.
>She shuffles in place before making to leave, but Anon stops one of his friends mid-conversation and turns to her.
"Hey, Blush, just come over here and say something if you need to," he calls out to her, getting his friends, and a few others, to turn in her direction.
>Face heating up under the scrutiny, especially from the many confused, and even envious girls, Wallflower hurries over to Anon.
you sound like you secretly love tranny cock
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I know we like to joke about how much of a crusty cunt RD is, but when it comes to wing-grooming she'd probably be one of the cleanest
Having a dirty cunt doesn't do much in terms of flight, but having dirty, unkept wings does
All the effort and care she should put into the rest of her body, she'd probably put into her wings, if only because it would make her faster
Now fluttershy,on the other hand...

Internal combustion engines, dehumidifiers, batteries, electroplating, power tools, can openers, refrigerators, A/C, lightbulbs...

There's a lot of stuff that you could sell to the horsies that isn't nano-scale.

It's just a matter of getting the Crown's best to help you reverse -engineer it based on your shaky knowledge of how it works.
Jesus. This place has sunk lower than expected.
Back in the golden age of /mlp/ even hinting at a guy changing gender and taking dick would be sent out of here faster than George Floyd at a private BBQ in Derek Chauvin's yard.
As the phrase "reverse engineering" was used, I read this to mean he sold them the artifacts he had on his person when appearing in Equestria, rather than using half remembered knowledge to help them develop new technologies.
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speak for yourself tranny lover, and stop projecting your shit fetish in this thread.
I use the idea of Anon selling his phone frequently to handwave money problems away.
The way I see it, they will eventually figure it out, they have all the time in the world, the princesses most of all.
If getting a smartphone doesn't produce new technologies in a year, but instead a decade or two, well then it was just a long-term investment.
Especially considering that, unless Anon is getting a literal fortune, and is instead only getting enough to live frugally for a lifetime without working, then the crown isn't losing much in the grand scheme of things.
It would be like the US government giving you one-million dollars, it's a drop in the bucket for them, but a good amount of money for you as long as you aren't stupid with it.
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Fluttershy always looks like she just stepped out of a shampoo commercial, there's no way she's a filthy pony who doesn't bathe and groom herself regularly.
I feel like the creator of this image was supposed to be saying that people who post saying they hate transformation content are secretly in denial.
How I interpret it, though, is that people can genuinely not like transformation stories/greens, could prefer the idea of being human in Equestria, but won't complain if the impossible happens to them and they end up a pony in Equestria.
Seriously, I would prefer to be a human in Equestria, too, and prefer such stories, but if I ended up in Equstria as a non-human, I'm not going to be mad.
If it was my only chose in reaching there, I'm going to take it. Shit, I wouldn't care if I was a Labrador or poodle in Equestria, because I would be IN EQUESTRIA!
I'd be counting my blessings about being away from this hellhole, not my misfortune of losing my human form.
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It's not that people who hate transformation content are in denial. What these people hate most about it is the gender bending and fetishism associated with it. When removing those elements you have a story that got's more substance to it with real story telling that isn't tainted by this trans fetishism, and what you end up with is good story telling all people can love and enjoy.
Ohh boy. She's about to spill massive spaghetti isn't she?
More Small poners doing normal human sized things pls
Like "the long and short of it"?
I feel like that one pulls off the whole Anon Pone thing pretty well.
Thanks for the warning was somewhat curious of it but wasn’t sure it would be worth it on Reddit itself I can sometimes find some worth reading
Thanks, I love it
It is my headcanon that she has giant albatross wings that are mostly down feathers, so she's not the fastest flier, but she can glide for hours and is incredibly fluffy and soft
So the gatekeeping is actually working, sorta. Anyway, yes, only those think of this place as shit whom are shit themselves. So please do continue, create content, time it so it breaks up a reeefest, fight the good fight alongside us. Godspeed, newfren!
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>He-Man inna RGRE
>meek traditional stallion by day
>straight up pornographic coltazon by night
what now
There was a serious take of Always-A-Horse-Anon in RGREquestria a while back and I decided to go look for it.
I can't believe how long it's been. Going on a year, but here it is.

Anyone else remember this? Since some greens are being revived and old writers are coming back, maybe this one will too.
Yeah I remember the misanthrope green
Getting some meat and alcohol in me and continuing this.
Who came up with personmare? Degraded mare, personmare
>the long and short of it
You mean the fic where Anon still has a penis and isn't eagerly getting fucked by another man, all while trying to argue that it's not gay? I can't imagine why that went over better than anonfilly.
I fucking LOVE worldbuilding where pegasi can have different types of bird wings.
Well that was fun, thanks again anonfilly fans for fucking ruining another thread with your presence. If you ever wonder why nobody likes your shit, look at this thread and realize that it's because you generate a field of shitposting around you and nobody fucking likes it when you shit up their threads.
The reason Anon is so appealing to mares is because he's got a comfy lap to sleep in. Look at that bad boy. It could fit, like, 3 full grown ponies. Nobody else in town can make that same claim.
>Mares go to Anon when they need a break from being a big strong marely mare breadwinner
>They take a nap in his lap and enjoy the security that comes from knowing another creature is going to watch over them while they sleep
>Also, at least one part of their bodies is most likely going to be touching his crotch
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I wonder if the guy who made this edit still hangs around.
>Pegasus with owl wings is always accidently sneaking up on ponies.
>Is BFF's with a bat pony.
If the mare with Canadian Goose wings honks at me, I'm socking her right in the kisser. One decided my back yard was its brand new nest, and the little shit had the audacity to get all flappy and honky and tell ME to leave.
Is that an edit from that rgr manga or something?
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>Booping a stallion is actually for his own good
>Stress builds up in a stallion's body, giving him silly thoughts and urges like "I should be able to get a job" or "I deserve the right to vote" or "I should be able to have ambitions outside the household".
>Booping is like the pressure release valve
>It gets rid of all those frustrations
>Once they're back to normal, they'll be happy to care for their foals and shit like that
It's honestly pretty necessary.
No clue, I just saw the original page and then the edit and thought "golly that's neato".
Is that silly bitch who gets upset over the name of the planet Equestria is on still here?
I thought he got his 'tism about the name Hearth instead?
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"Hearth" as the planet name still scratches an itch i never knew was there, especially if you take it as being "Horse-Earth"
I need a mare to boop me
I am minus ten minutes away from shouting racial slurs at this fucking voip hardware
I went and reread it and ot was from the manga
I have a better way of solving this: Anonfilly is Anon's pony daughter, no transformation involved.
You are funny
What manga?
The World of Moral Reversal
Buttfucks Anonymous, by Ching Cong Bing Bong.
Meant to him
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>Penis Inspection Day Advocate
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>ywn have a mare defend your honor and stand up for you
You know how to deal with them. Grab by the necc and then yeet!
Nah, you chop their head off with axe just like you would do with any other naughty goose.
>page 10
wake up fuckboys
Shut up I'm trying to sleep
>ywn get a box seat for Celestia's day court
>ywn persuade one of your wittier colt friends to tag along
>ywn heckle the nobility statler and waldorf style together
>ywn watch the guardsmares scrunch to keep from laughing
>ywn watch celestia herself struggle to keep a straight face
>ywn wonder how this is rgre in the slightest
why live?
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Would Cadance hulk out if I ordered a pizza with chicken, steak, ham, pineapple, black olives, and onions?

I call it a "Hawaiian on roids."
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>Anon is the Royal Jester
>Can get away with saying outlandish things about everyone because Celly thinks it's hilarious.
>And he's a crazy monkey man.
>Noblemares can't justify slapping his shit, because male (and in public).
>Noblestallions wish they could get away with saying some of the shit he does, but dread when he turns his whimsical wit on them.
>When the villain of the season comes around, their ego inevitably does not permit them to ignore his masculine mockery, giving the Princess additional time to enact her plans before jobbing.
I call you a retard.
Was it coming off as misanthrope? I'm the writer and that's not what I was going for.
Just because the ponies misunderstand the situation doesn't mean the humans were evil.
Anon loving the human child is a good example of humans not being evil.
We need a green where the Italian Stallion (metaphorical) Anon becomes renown for being the best pizza maker in Equestria and being recruited as the Crystal Royal Families personal chef.
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>A lot of mares get pretty frisky when it gets warmer out
>There's one that gets a hell of a lot frisker
Engie you better have some new green for the next thread to save us from this stupid fucking autism, I swear.
>You continue slowly petting her while her friends are off getting drinks.
>It's actually quite relaxing. Her coat is nice and soft.
>You didn't tell the others what to get you, but at least they can't get anything too bad in this place.
>They return in a minute, still looking a little surprised.
>"Uhh, we weren't sure what to get you, so we asked the barmare what you usually drink," Warden says.
>"You actually like ale? The real good, bitter stuff?" Sky River asks.
"Wouldn't be here if I didn't, would I? Not like this place sells other kind of drinks," You say, reaching for your mug.
>"It's safe, by the way," Warden adds. "We didn't mess with your drink, I promise."
>You chuckle.
"Wouldn't do anything if you did. Fortunately for me, your weird pony date-rape drugs don't work on me at all. I found that out through lots of experience."
>Warden scowls.fiercely.
>"Seriously? Right here in Canterlot? I'd expect that from some seedy holes in Manehatten or other cities, but the capital..."
>She seems to have the strongest reactions to ponies misbehaving.
>With a special emphasis on Canterlot.
>Maybe she's a local, or perhaps some kind of noble.
>The few that you met did tend to go on and on about "proper behavior", despite being massive douchenozzles themselves.
>It seemed that "The aristocrats!" was as much of a joke here as back on Earth.
"Yeah. Maybe I went to some "bad parts of town" or something, I don't really know. But it happened fairly often. Honestly, I can't say for certain how often that happened, because mares would end up buying drinks for me every single time I went out somewhere. And since usually I can't even tell if the drink was spiked or not, I don't know how many tried it.
>"Shouldn't be bad parts in Canterlot..." Warden grumbles into her mug.
>You shrug.
>The other two don't seem happy about the situation either, but keep quiet.
"Gotta admit though, it was surprising at just how often I noticed them trying it. Do stallions really get drugged and dragged away every single time they so much as step outside their house?"
>"No," Sabaton says firmly. "The dungeons would be full to bursting if that was the case. The Guard takes things like that seriously. Proper mares don't treat stallions that way. "
"Hrm. Maybe because I'm something unusual. You'd think that would be a turn-off instead of the other way around, though."
>"Uh, well... An exotic stallion is something just about any mare would be very, very interested in having."
"I think I remember some of the newspaper articles calling me that... "Exotic alien stallion from places unknown", or something like that. I guess that hyped me up for all the weirdos in the city. Bleh."
>"What about the place where you came from, though? Let's say, a stallion dropped in from Equestria. Are you saying none of the human mares would be interested at all?" Sky River asks.
>You stop to think.
>Really think. This an interesting question.
>There might be some women interested in a cute little pony with a horse dick.
>Until he opened his mouth, that is.
>Then again, some might like the whiny bastards anyway.
>Little girls would be the ones who would really go nuts over the pony, though.
>They'd likely ride him to death, and not in the sexy fun way.
"Not sure, but not nearly as much as the attention I got, that's for sure."
>Not to mention the whole "government would likely lock him up" thing."
"Now, if a mare dropped in, well..."
>You consider all the stuff you saw online.
>People fetishizing everything from knitting to xenomorphs.
>You glance at the mares.
>Sophisticated faces, clearly sapient, cute looks, exotic colors, slightly smaller than humans...
>Shapely booty.
"Yeah, there'd be lines stretching several blocks long. Most would only like to see an alien, but there'd be loads of people interested in sexytimes."
>"Loads of... Mares?" Sky River asks uncertainly.
"Guys. Men. Thousands. Hundreds of thousands, probably. The internet - well, you don't know what that is. It's technology to share information quickly, among other things. People would find out about you very, very fast, and... Yeah, there'd be lots of interest of that sort, I'd bet."
>The mare's eyes are wide again.
>"Nooo... You're pulling my tail. That's impossible."
"Seriously? You just asked me yourself what the reaction back home would be. Now you're surprised I confirmed what you were thinking in the first place?"
>"Sure, I'd get such a thing for a stallion, but for a mare? No stallion would just-"
"Not. Stallions. MEN. We're... Different from your males. A lot. More than just our choice of drinks."
>She quiets down, but is obviously unconvinced. The other two look doubtful as well.
>you shake your head.
"I've seen you ponies casually tell the laws of physics to go sit in a corner while you violate the fabric of reality, but aliens having a different disposition is unbelievable to you? Come on."
>They mull it over for a bit.
>Sabaton tries to form a question.
>"So, ah.. From the way you're describing it, your society, is, what? A bunch of Amarezonian sta- men, all huge and strong, in charge of your tribes? And they're the ones who chase down females?
>The other two look excited at such a prospect.
>You snort, putting a hand over your mouth. It doesn't help much, as you end up laughing your ass off anyway.
>You hold Sabaton tighter so she doesn't fall off as you're shaking from laughter.
>It takes a little while for the giggles to subside.
>The mares look at you expectantly.
"Alright, well.. First of all, calling it "tribes" gives the image of some kind of primitive hole in the woods. We have a rather advanced civilization, thank you very much. A bunch of our technology is actually quite far ahead compared to you, though that might be because there's no magic in our world, so we had to get creative."
>"No magic?!"
>"How do you... Do things? Everything? Grow crops, get rain, build things -"
>Villain of the week comes
>anon uses one of his best material to get their attention

Check and check and bueno.
"I knew investing in fire protection potions was a good idea. Always thought it would be Glimglam or Spitfire to be the first one to snap, though."
It's definitely not misanthropic, that anon is just retarded.
"Science. And technology. And, most importantly, hands," you explain, showing off your digits with your right hand.
>Your left one moves to Sabaton's scalp, scratching her behind the ears.
>She lets out a small gasp and bites her lip, lidding her eyes and pressing herself against you.
>Sky River and Warden watch you with wide eyes.
>You chuckle. Poor mares are just constantly getting their minds blown tonight.
>You stop after a couple minutes, making Sabaton pout for a moment before she recomposes her expression into something more "marely".
"Now, as I was saying... It's... Well, that was a really silly description, but yes, our men are a lot more like the mares around here, far as our behavior goes, anyway. Our gender ratio is almost one to one, with a very slight tilt to females, because they tend to live longer."
>The three get thoughtful, likely trying to imagine something that sounds completely alien to them.
>"A country run by stallions..." Sky River mutters.
>Clearly, such a concept is a little out there for them.
>A country run entirely by women might be a little surprising to you, but not nearly as shocking as they're making it out to be.
>You guess that the stallions really have no interest in politics here.
>Or they're too busy beating off the mares all the time.
>Sabaton tries again.
>"So then, your... Politicians? Your military, your... Goodness, there's so many marely professions, now that I think about it... Miners, other industry workers, builders, scientists... All of them are full of men, instead?"
>You shrug, making a so-so gesture.
"Not entirely. There's a little less disparity between the genders back home, I think. We had both female and male leaders, for example. Some of those, though? Yeah, absolutely. The military, for one. Ninety-nine percent or so male, and the only reason women even get in is because the idiots at the top took pity at the screeching activists and lowered the entry requirements for them."
>That tidbit makes the mares go slack-jawed.
>Some of the conversations around the bar quiet down, too.
>You haven't realized just how many ponies might have been eavesdropping on your conversation.
>With their fancy moving ears, they could pick up sounds quite well.
>Guess you have an audience.
>Not like it matters, you suppose.
>None of this was any kind of secret, and you already told pretty much everything to the scientists that interviewed you.
>Warden purses her lips after taking a pull from her mug.
>"Alright, look... I get that you come from a different place, but sending sta- men to fight still sounds wrong. The fighting, and... Injuries..."
>She unconsciously runs a hoof over her broken horn while glancing at you, as if looking for scars.
>You never served, so you don't have any.
"Injuries... Heh. Try death. Remember the slightly larger amount of women over men? "

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