>"Jeez, Anon. It's as hot as a Nirik's rectum in here. When did we move to Tartarus?"
>>37859790I want to cause havoc with this mare
>>37860956no, psycho mare
>>37859790>no art of her in the gimp suitBig sad
>>37859880>>37860956>>37861286>>37862449>Square muzzle>MareYeah how about no, that's a big cooked stallion.
>>37859790I headcanon him being Poke from Express Quest's dad. It just makes sense to me.
>>37862672Don't make fun of her for her bulky muzzle.
>>37860355I-I'll sign it just don't kill my dog please!
>>37860355No, fuck off
>>37862672don't cook the stallions please
>>37859790>>37862672>>37862827>"Hey Anon, do you think my muzzle looks weird?">"I was getting signatures for that petition I started, when some fuckin' moron said it looked like a stallion's">"What? Psh, I don't give a shit, I'm just askin' cause you're the only dude around here who isn't afraid to speak your mind.>"Cute? Pfft yeah, okay, you freakin' pinko.">"Thanks..."
>>37862864weirdly enough he voices the Postal Dude in 4
>>37859790Postal Mare!Mare mare mare!
>>37859790I haven't played Postal series but yet I want Postal mare to be a thing.
>>37864244Now this is the content I'm lurking for!
>>37864244>still read it in his voice
>>37866528>read it in a nowacking type voiceI hate how unimaginative my head was there
>>37860355...Okay, I guess that sounds pretty good!
>>37864244>tough mare GF who swears like a sailor and doesn't care about looking pretty but still gets blushy and awkward upon receiving a complimentOh no. She's cute.
What would sex with her be like?
>>37868278It will invariably involve napalm and pissing.And honestly, that just makes me want to do her more.
>>37868278slow and loving.
>>37868278Ask her ex.
>>37869034>Postal Mare says she has an ex but dodges explaining when you bring it up>She later confesses that she doesn’t actually have one, and you’re her first boyfriend
>>37859790>>37864244>>37867598>>37869987I love her.
Never played the Postal games, are they fun?
>>37870100I've only played the second one. It's janky but fun. Kinda reminds me of GTA when I would just dick around.
>>37870100Yeah, they're all fun. Except Postal 3, don't touch 3.
77 degrees is a perfectly livable temperature take that ridiculous coat off and get me a glass of lemonade
>>37870100>PostalIt's okay. It's an isometric shooter, so think OG Fallout with real time combat. Extremely edgy. You play as a dangerous literal schizo who's killing as many people as possible to "cleanse" something. >Postal 2The highlight and best game of the "series", if you could call it that. Extremely fun, if a bit clunky, but the jank just adds to the experience. Load zones are frequent and can lead to crashes, so manually save frequently if you take it up. Rick Hunter (the VA for Postal Dude) is golden. Also has lots of mods, good DLCs and an active and dedicated community around the game.>Postal 3Black sheep of the series. Developed by ruskies with support from Running With Scissors. Had their funding towards the A team cut halfway through development by the publisher or something like that, so it turned into a mess. Has a good main theme, though.>Postal 4Haven't played this yet because I don't think its finished. Looks fun, Postal 2 in a more stable engine. Might have lost some of the soul, though. Rick Hunter wasn't available to voice it, so they got Jon St. John (Duke Nukem VA) to do it. Unconfirmed but there's speculation that Rick might be part of 4 at some point, either redubbing or whatever.
>>37870133Extremely edgy doesn’t do it Justice, Game is some of the most ballsy fucked up shit I’ve ever played.Original game ends with an Elementary School level, so that level of edgy.
>>37870100>>37870133Replayed it recently, I wouldn't even classify it on edgy, it can legit make you feel insane if you beat it all on one night. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qee3TjASCsOh yeah and Postal 2 is fun I guess
>>37870981I believe it's a reference to an army vet getting a job at a post office and getting made fun of (for some reason) and he shoots up the post office or something
>>37871027Well he would cause the chain of events that would eventually lead to the the edgiest video game ever made so he's got that going for him
>>37870789>mare>Don't care about the gender
What would be the pony equivalent of going postal?>>37871027>never ticked any of the boxes for a 'mass shooter' that you can see in other people.Like?
>>37871496People have essentially replaced the word "pony" with "mare". It's retarded, I know.
>>37871644>derpy crashing into things isn’t on accident>she went postal after Anon denied her muffins
>>37871661No, they havent. Mare refers to mares, not stallions.
>>37872161You misunderstood what I meant. Years ago people barely if ever used the word “mare” to refer to the ponies, nowadays “mare” is said way more frequently instead of just “pony”. I think this is a recent thing.
somebody write a postal mare green right fucking now
>>37859790Imagine postal mare dropping hot turds on your front porch every morning
>>37870680God this game was too good for us mere mortals
>>37871712>I WAS ALWAYS WILLING TO BE REASONABLE UNTIL I HAD TO BE UNREASONABLE>SOMETIMES REASONABLE MARES MUST DO UNREASONABLE THINGS (for muffins)
I need her in my life
>>37873225No experience with Postal, so I dunno the personality.
>>37874144It won't be a long life then
>>37874936If the game is only as violent as you are, is she just as violent as you are? You better have the pacifist achievements for P2 and Paradise Lost.
>>37875383Even as a pacifist, she will be very violent with you. In bed.
Would you like to make a generous donation to this dubious charity?
>>37877321I would dump a sack of bits in thereThen dip my sack in her mouth.based drawfag
RWS is so based they even added a MLP episode to their next game's trailer:https://youtu.be/I_Wdy5sJZQU?t=146
Now the flowers will grow...
>>37877664need postal marefriend
>>37870997>>37871043>>37871644why were these posts deleted? was it redacted info?
>>37878159an explanation of where the term "postal" originated.this one confuses me more, though.
>>37877432Yeah Mike J is a confirmedywsd horsefucker.
>>37878282>captcha failI fucking hate this new captcha system sometimes
>>37878159>>37878273Probably got banned somewhere else for something else which deleted all of his posts across all threads.
>>37860355No way you freakin' pinko!
>>37879098Okay that sounds pretty nice.
>>37879098that's a boop and a sign from me
>>37879098You probably thought you weren't gonna be booped today... SURPRISE!
>>37879098best mareI demand a miss /mlp/ recount to account for Postal Mare
>>37879098Okay, I guess that sounds pretty good.
>>37877664Uncensored version when?
>>37859790You were the one who wanted to move down here for that STUPID video game job
>>37882527>"Yeah, well poison joke doesn't buy itself."
>>37882583When you're done screwing around, I made a list of errands for you on the fridge!
>>37879098Sounds pretty nice actually.Good job postalmare.
>>37883237>Anon becomes The Bitch to the Postal MareSad end desu. At least there aren't any guns around for her to shoot herself in the end.
>>37884823The errand list:>Enjoy the fresh air.>Smile!>Have breakfast (I ordered doughnuts for you to pick up from Sugarcube Corner!)>Visit Twilight at the Treebary for a surprise! It's a Gary Coltman signed autobiography>Don't forget to have fun!>Have a great day!>Remember, I love you!
>>37885028I want to play this as a mod.
>>37889727Was that the spinny gif? Why?
>>37890170>everyone who posts in the postal mare thread is a psycho that ends up getting globally banned and having their posts wipedpottery
Please don't think I'm a specist, I kill shitposters equally.
>>37878159>>37878565Yeah that was me, I got banned for racism outside of /b/
>>37890592Excuse you, I'm sociopath, those are very different things.
>>37892142I prefer the term lunatic
>>37893011Personally, I'm fond of the "puckish rogue".>Postal Mare and an equally fucked-up Anon end up in Ponyville>neither can stand the happy-happy bullshit of the townsp- townsponies>quickly find respite in each other>Fluttershy starts getting horror stories about the couple on their weekends innawoods>the numbers of napalm-induced forest fires skyrocket>the sorta-couple just trying to live their lives in peace while the crazy shit around them keeps popping up>used up most of their napalm-silly putty combo on the last week's monster>instead of praise or at least a measly "thank you for saving us from this week's big baddie" they got fined for their fine invention>Rarity was ready to run them out of town, though she got distracted by the news of Opal's speedy recovery>despite all, princesses keep insisting they're not bad peo- human and pony, their hearts are in the right place>…they just go about doing good things the wrong way>or so Twilight keeps hearing from Sun Butt>she better raise her stipend, there's only so much damage you can weasel out of paying for, since Anon and Postal Mare are broke>in fact, they've been living in a trailer>…which looks a lot like the one Trixie used to have>when asked, they said they just found it>hopefully Trixie is okay
You probably thought this thread was gonna die today, surprise!
>>37898428Geez, did someone kill a yak in here? No seriously I want to know.
>>37898428it finally happenedshe got her muffins stolen