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Clean start edition
/moon/day pastebin: https://pastebin.com/He5X50m6
(for broken pastebin.com links use poneb.in : replace pastebin.com with poneb.in in the URL, eg https://poneb.in/He5X50m6 )
Previous thread: >>36364128
Humanizations of Princess Luna and others have a dedicated thread - post them there. Keep it pony (aside from inclusions of Anonymous in pics).
>>
How is she so pretty? I wonder what she smells like
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I love this poner.
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Luna invites you to the castle to talk to you more about the dreams you have been having lately.
>pic related
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>>36392658
Lavender is what I imagine.

>>36392668
Oof. Never seen that one before - pretty, but it hurts a little, too.
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>>36392658
>I wonder what she smells like
She smells like moon of course.
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>>36392641
it's not monday yet
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>>36392733
Tis 4:30pm Monday here on the bottom.
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>>36392641
>Making the thread at am hours when everyone's sleeping
why?
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>>36392685
In one of my latest dreams I was a Yugoslavian soldier who was tasked with killing an Albanian witch, so I used a little paddle boat to get to a floating church in the middle of a glowing green ocean where the witch was holding some sort of sermon, as she approached me I pulled a desert eagle out of my coat and shot her four times (for some reason I remember this part extremely vividly, I shot her in the shoulder, paused for a second, shot her again in the waist, paused for another second, then put two rapid shots into her chest and gut).
I ran out of the church as everyone was in shock and jumped into the boat that started moving towards shore on its own, a few guards ran out of the church so I shot at them a couple times to get them to duck and managed to escape.

Please explain this bullshit miss dream queen.
>>
>>36392908
>"what even is a yugoslavia anon? From the sound of it, seems like a place for drunk dumb savages"
>"this is the cringiest, is this what foals and fillies call it?, dream I've ever heard of, anon, I apologize for I can give you no explanation"
>"maybe you need to... grow up? It seems very emotionally immature to dream about shooting witches in the name of some savage country"
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>>36393032
>seems like a place for drunk dumb savages
Yeah, that sums up most of Eastern Europe
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>>36392850
because luna is the night
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I love this mare.
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Even though Luna's licking a donut, I choose to interpret this pic as completely wholesome. Just a sweet night pone who found a giant dream donut.
>>
>>
>>36393354
>Celestia does this to greet her sister since her return from banishment.
>Luna considers this to be the new normal, casual way of greeting in Equestria now.
>>
>>36393403
What if that's how Celestia used to greet her sister long ago?
>>
I love moon
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>>36392728
>She smells like moon of course.
So she smells faintly of gunpowder?
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>>36393562
Hell yeah
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>>36393487
No way, I do too! What a coincidence that we would both be here!
>>
Do you guys wish Luna a good night before you go to sleep?
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>>36394061
No, I am not autistic, she is not real.
I do dream of her though.
>>
>>36394065
It doesn't matter so much if she is real in material or real in the mind. If you find her in dreams you still have a perception of her.
>>
>>36394065
>No, I am not autistic, she is not real
Is this supposed to be bait?
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i've never posted any greens here but i was wondering if anyone would be interested in keeping up with an anon x luna green i'm cooking up
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>>36394065
Holy based realist. You're one of the few people on this godforsaken board that I'd actually enjoy an interaction with if we bumped into each other.
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>>36394328
Yeah dude. The more long running greens we have, the better this thread will be.
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>>36394328
Only if you make Luna speak in ye olde classical english.
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>>36394065
What are those dreams like?
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>>36394328
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Who is this faggot?
>Pic related
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>>36394061
No, but I've had a few wet dreams about her ever since I started focusing on meditation and improving my overall health. Good times.
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>>36394497
>>
>>36394368
Thank you. I do love ponies and Luna is my new favourite but one needs to remain realistic.
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>see this
What do?
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>>36394539
Dunno, I don't think you love Luna. You merely pretend to. If you truly did love her, you would know not to say nonsense like she's not real and such.
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>>36394543
Aggressively pet

I'll go ahead and dump the first chapter here but the rough idea I'm going for is "Celly and Lulu don't get along after Luna returns from the moon and Anon has to mediate between them." Not really sure what I have planned long term but I guess I'll see what kind of feedback I get. Incoming green.
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>>36394539
Whatever you do, don't reply to the other autist that replied to you. He's unironically retarded.
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>>36394328
> be you, anon E. mouse
> anon for short, usually
> you are many things
> idiot
> pessimist
> snout flicker
> obscenity-that-nothing-on-this-alien-planet-understands spewer
> but most importantly, you are anonymous the problem solver
> it started way back when you first got here through some magical nonsense and happened upon some couple of horse fools hopelessly lost in the woods despite there being a clear exit only a few yards away
> their bickering was so intense they had no idea they were going deeper into the thick of it and likely going to wind up dead in a few hours judging from their meager rations and lack of expertise in exploring dense brush
> in a sort of demeaning, matter-of-fact sort of way, you pointed out a few things to the arguing fellows
> namely, the fact that the map was not upside down, there was still plenty of daylight to go around, and the trail they were looking for was only 'invisible' because they didn't have a head six feet off the ground to see it with
> that's right folks, six feet tall
> it's fun to pretend sometimes
> despite their understandable surprise and fear at being corrected by a species they'd like never seen before in a remote stretch of woods no doubt far from home, they seemed to understand you were helping (in a kind of rude asshole way) and corrected themselves appropriately, decidedly less talkative than before
> ever since, it's been problem after problem you've been sorting out since you got to 'ponyville', which is where you were closest to when you arrived apparently
> you'd met a few ponies that stood out among the rest, such as bookhorse, faghorse and applehorse, and been put to work by the town's mayor as a sort of 'peace keeping' entity similar to how police would function back home if their guns were practical, obvious solutions and black people were shallow disagreements between colorful horses
>>
>>36394564
Cliche plot, but go for it, your take pn the subject could be interesting. Just be wary anons like >>36394562 will probably shit on your efforts. They are not from /moon/ they are from...
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>>36394543
Kiss and take her virginity right there and then.
>>
>>36394574
> bookhorse gave you a place to stay at the treebrary (no one called it that but you sure did) in exchange for a few chores and life was generally pretty good
> sure, you missed home and modern technology, but equestrian magic was unique in its own way and was useful in ways similar to electricity on earth or something
> it was going to be more of the same today, but not before you kicked your feet up on the table and relaxed into the comfiest sofa you've ever owned
> there was a particular store in town that sold only two objects: sofas and quills
> and you had to admit, they were some of the best damn sofas and quills you'd ever laid eyes on
> you didn't have much of a use for quills because you didn't write shit and didn't intend to start but those sofas were out of this world
> it was a mystery what kind of material they were made out of (it clearly wasn't leather because cows were apparently sentient here)
> didn't matter much to you, though, because after saving up for one of your very own it turned average days like these into the makings of exquisite afternoon delight the likes of which equestria had probably never seen
> nobody could relax like you
> nob-
> "Anon! Anon, are you in there? I know it's your day off and all, but you need to get your lazy butt up and come read this!"
> well, it WAS going to be more of the same until bookhorse burst into your room with the wildest, most strung out look on her face you'd ever seen
> you knew the unicorn could get riled up over the weirdest shit, so you weren't immediately alarmed or anything, but when your eyes fell on the object aglow in her magical grip it was clear something unusual was going on here
> "Anon, this is an official summons from Princess Celestia herself in Canterlot! Do you know what this means?"
"Uh, not really? I take it that's not something that happens every day, right?"
>>
>>36394572
Whatever you do, stop posting humanized Luna in this thread. Read the OP and go to your containment thread.
>>36394564
Ignore people like >>36394576 and >>36394572. They are trolls. They have shat up the previous thread and will shit up this one.
>>
>>36394588
>"Read the OP and go to your containment thread."
>post policing
Nope. This has been me home since 2012. Not going anywhere, autist.
>>
>>36394576
>>36394585
> twilight violently shook her head and rushed down the stairs to your basement pad, taking a seat next to you on the couch
> she fought the urge to completely relax into the baby-soft fabric of the sofa and kept her eyes locked on you as she spoke with barely-contained enthusiasm
> "You're going up to Canterlot by train tomorrow to work for Celestia herself for a while, maybe forever! It doesn't say here what kind of work you'll be doing but no doubt it's something important that only YOU could do! Oh Anon, I'm so proud of you!"
> bookhorse practically fell into your lap to wrap her forelegs around you in a tight hug, a hug which you loathed to return
> ponies here were almost diabetes-levels of affectionate here and it was all you could do to escape from the odd nuzzle or hug every other second
> hell, when you first got here, the pink spaz clung to you for most of the day, commenting on how differently you smelled and trying to steer you via hair pulling like that one motherfucker from the rat movie
> you push twilight away and snatch the scroll from her magic before going over the contents yourself
>
>
"Huh... Well, guess I can't say no to a princess, right?"
> twilight shook her head and took the scroll from your hands before you could finish reading the tiny bit on the bottom, which annoyed you but didn't ruin your day or anything
> "That's right, Anon. You should be honored, though - it's not just ANYPONY that Princess Celestia invites to Canterlot to work directly under her! You're not even a pony!"
"Yeah, which makes this whole thing seem kind of strange. I mean, what would I be any good at that some other horse up there wasn't already doing well?"
>>36394576
yeah i realize the premise isnt overly unique but im hoping to spin it a little differently. ill talk more on it when i get back
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>>36394574
>anon E. mouse
Monkey D. Luffy!
Where did you use to post before? It's not so bad.
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>>36394599
Again, go back to your containment thread. Humanizations never belonged here. You already have at least 3(THREE) threads for them. Please, post them there. This thread is for pony Luna only.
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>>36394606
This thread is for Luna, shitstain. It ain't your hugbox.
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>>36394613
Yes, it is for Luna. And you still have not posted Luna. Worse yet, you are actively derailing this thread like now. Now, fuck off to fingerbang, /mlpg/, wherever the fuck you came from and stay there.
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>>36394543
Whisper in her ear she is miles better than her evil sister, and I'll give her the love tia deprived her of for a millenium. As I caress her cheeks and start kissing down her neck.

Plus taking her virginity, she has that over the other princess. Luna truly best pony.
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>>36394621
Luna isn't a slut, retard. I'm not going into any of those threads for Luna, I'm coming to the Luna thread for Luna.
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>>36394632
Did you mix up your script or what?
>I'm coming to the Luna thread for Luna.
How weird. I don't think you do. You come here to derail the thread. Just like you did just now. Please, stop posting humanized Luna. Post it somewhere else that is not here.
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I am still so grateful she is a virgin after all this time, for all the mistakes the writers might have committed with the show, I thank them for letting Luna not be morally destroyed by some pump and dump. Luna is sincerely pretty and with a great personality, she is unironically the best qualities you could find in a partner all in one package. She deserves the best, someone who will love her forever and be an incresible man himself.

She is why I lift, I have gotten fit enough to be a good partner when I make it to Equestria. I have studied poetry and written odes to the night. Her moon cradles my nights.

Luna, I'll be your first husband, and the best one there can be.
-Sincerely, Anon
>>
>>36394649
its good that you lift but she's not real
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>>36394649
This is a very cute sentiment anon, I am glad one can find motivation to carry on throught best princess
>>
>>36394328
has any anon in the history of /mlp/ ever answered no to this question
>>
>>36394657
I am aware destiny could hurt me with such a malicious twist friend. I am glad you replied, as long as she lights my life, even as fantasy, I will keep improving myself.

Maybe we will be able to upload our minds to a simulation before I die. Never lose hope, anon.
>>
>>36394673
im at least glad you're willing to admit she's not real. that's a healthy sign.
here's hoping we get something someday though. the thought of being with her is the true endgame.
>>
>>36394673
Omg your feelings are so sweet, it is beautiful how /moon/ is so sincerely nice and truly loves Luna. You were even able to come to a nice agreement with the other anon, certainly better than other princess generals

Get a luna plushie if you haven't already
>>36394684
I hope we all get our own version of Luna /moon/friend, I am being honest when I say I know you are a good person too, and wish that in some way shape or form Luna has made your nights a little nicer
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>>36394684
She is, though. Just like you trolling, which is real too.
>>
>>36394368
>>36394572
>>36394643
Fuck off with your humanized garbage. Pony only thread. Read the OP and fuck off.
>>
>>36394368
>>36394572
>>36394643
Fuck off to anywhere else.
>>
>>36394713
>>36394796
>>36394808
Be honest, you are not from /moon/ are you? The human posts aren't even harming anyone, they are contributing to the thread.
>>
>>36394814
PONY
THREAD
Piss off and post your off topic garbage where it belongs.
>>
>>36394814
Go shit up some other thread faggot.
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>>36394821
Did you even read the OP you illiterate moron?
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>>36394821
>contributing
>>
>>36394827
>/moon/ general
>posters from /sun/ come here to troll
Did they?
Leave the luna thread alone if your waifu is any other horse, please.
>>
>>36394821
Non-Anon human posts do not belong in a pony thread on a pony board. Besides, didn't OP already state that there is a special thread for such content?
>>
S T O P

F U C K I N G

R E S P O N D I N G
>>
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We need more comfy Luna pics here.
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>>36394858
We appreciate your info, flutteranon. I have grown quite suspicious of that group too, but it is best to ignore.
Please anons, just stop responding to bait, please. You will make Luna sad.

A little thought to help you all reflect
>and you were just like the moon
>so lonely, so full of imperfections
>but just like the moon you shined
>in times of darkness
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>>36394874
Beautiful thought
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How about that Luna, huh? I'd like to dip my fishing rod in her Sea of Tranquility, if you know what I'm saying.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm1Mzft8rLc
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>>36394951
>censoring nipple the nipple just makes it more obvious
Kek, got a chuckle out of me
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>>36394958
Don't want a vacation for posting parts of the human anatomy, now, don't we
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>>36394951
Fuck off faggot.
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>>36394858
>deleted from desuarchive too
What the hay, this is really weird. And it was just a post complaining about a white horse general. I am sincerely confused now.
>>36394874
Thanks for the thought anon, right now I am confused as fuck. Maybe there is some credibility to what anons have previously said. But I will share your sentiment, so I reply to you to help remind anons.
JUST IGNORE BAITERS NO MATTER IF THEY ARE FROM OTHER GENERLS OR NOT, JUST IGNORE

>>36392641
Anyway, /moon/ I wish you all a good week. We deserve one after the rough start of 2021. If your only waifu is Luna, you are worthy of good fortune in my eyes, so I will focus my good vibes on all of us. That's what Luna would want of us, to be nice to each other, it seems like external forces are trying to make us fight.

Take care /moon/! It doesn't get said enough but I love you /moon/buddies, you re the closest things to friends I have. And don't forget Luna loves you too!
>>
>>36394869
And they say she doesn't have an ass
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>>36395024
>And it was just a post complaining about a white horse general
It's a troll that is trying to get /moon/ and /sun/ fight each other.
>>
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>>36394858
You are full of shit.
For starters, you are here quite often for someone who claims to never visit.
Secondly, people from /sun/ don't wear a badge. All the people you claim are "derailing" threads have nothing to do with the general.
Humans are and have been posted on /sun/. They are shot down immediately by everyone else, because people remember what happened to /mom/.
/sun/ and /moon/ have gotten along for literal years. Probably 50% of people crosspost. We have had sunfags chilling here when the thread was down, and vice versa, for years with zero issues. We have had sister threads if both /sun/ and /moon/ happened to be dead, for years. We have bumped each other threads.
On the other hand, I find quite curious that this narrative that "sunfags can do what they want with impunity" has been spinned consistently ever since people have started complaining about humanfags spamming the board.
You, or someone like you, have also made a thread on /qa/ mocking the style and purpose of the threads discussing the humanfag problem.
To me, it seems you are part of the pack of shitstains that has posted garbage on /moon/ and tried to blame it on /sun/. Possibly even part of the absolute fucking retards that like to spam human garbage everywhere. Only they would benefit from spinning a story that a bunch of other people are spamming too.
I don't know who you think you're fooling, but it's not me.
t. /moon/ and /sun/ regular for many years.

>>36395024
Desuarchive won't catch posts if they are deleted quickly enough. They are using an outdated, resource-hungry post scraper.
archive.wakarimasen.moe is using the new archiving stack, and should have caught the post.
If posts are deleted really quickly, you won't find them anywhere because Hiro slowed down 4chan's API update rate.
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>>36395076
It's probably the monkey spammer just trying to cloud the issue.
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>>36395063
If you were a /moon/bro you wouldn't call any of us a troll.
Please stop lambasting us, please, if that's some anon beliefs leave him be and ignore. You are being more toxic for coming to /moon/ and insulting us calling us names.

Not once have I seen you praising Luna, just complaining. Is your waifu even Luna or are you from a different general?
>>36395024
I wish you a good week too anon.
>>36395076
That's nice to know, thanks for teaching us about how archives work anon. Wish you a good week too.
>>
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>>36395093
Adorable woonas
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>>36395093
OK, you are clearly trolling here, just changed up your tactics, but still trolling. Or you're just being extremely clueless, which is just as bad.
>>
>>36395097
Scratch that, you ARE a troll as your pic indicates. If you weren't one, you would not be posting humanizations here.
>>
>>36395093
>>36395094
Fuck off you monkey posting sack of shit.
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>>36395108
Do not engage, report and move on.
>>
>>36395097
>>36395103
Stop giving him attention, immaturefag.
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>>36395110
What to report for though? Trolling, off topic, or avatarfagging? I've done trolling so far and it didn't work.
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>>36395127
For exceptionally low post quality.
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>>36395076
>"/moon/ regular" shits on /moon/bros posting Luna and pointing something fishy going on with other sister general
>instead of driving home the point of friendship and working with one another he shits on the new blood of /moon/ posting human Luna
I... I just don't get you people. It might be true that lots of people crossposts but why would you defend the ones trolling regardless of where they are from? They have their waifu we have ours. Never have I insulted anyone using /moon/, and I never go to /sun/, I want peace. Why do you insult the people here so freely? You are all for "sisters, we are friends teehee" but the moment I post 1 human Luna I get shit on, and I know it is not /moon/buddies yelling at me either, I am friends with people from here and have written greens that have been liked.

You are being mean to us without a reason. I just wish we were left alone.

I DON'T WANT BAD BLOOD, I LOVE LUNA, WE ALL DO IN OUR OWN WAYS. LET EVERYONE RESPECTFULLY EXIST PLEASE.

Sigh. Have a good /moon/day, everyone deserves a good /moon/day, even crossposters like these trying to get /moon/bros banned.
>>36395110
>>36395127
>>36395137
>>
>>36395178
Did you ever think about, I don't know, not replying you fucking retard?
>>
>>36395186
>calling me a retard
Whatever, have a good /moon/day anon. I hope we can raise our spirits.
>>
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If we all made it to Equestria at the same time, how would Luna choose the best of us to be her husband?
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>>36395246
She would certainly not tell anyone what she is looking for.
Most likely searching in our dreams to find the hidden traits of our personality, and making a list from there.
>>
>>36395270
>searching in our dreams to find the hidden traits of our personality
So in other word she would just stay a virgin, got it.
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>>36395283
Kek, what a gloomy thing to say. People on the inside are almost always better than on the outside, (except if they are normies), and Luna never came off as the type to care for chads.
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>>36395178
Luna is a pony. Period. Whatever weeb-tier shit is being spammed is NOT her and doesn't belong here. I have seen what happens when you let them in, and I won't lose another thread to these retards, let alone one of my favorite ones.
If you don't post pony, you don't belong here. I hate things being this way, but it's a necessary evil. It used to be 1-2 blank posts with humanized pics attached to them per thread, and that was OK. But that garbage has been eating up space on the entire board for years, it got progressively worse and it needs to be stopped.

>>36395270
Oof. I either don't dream or dream nonsensical stuff.
>>
>>36395307
Agreed. Monkey posters need to go.
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>>36395307
>Oof. I either don't dream or dream nonsensical stuff
Don't worry, if she entered your dream she still wouldn't choose you, she would notice you are a bully with a lot of hatred.
>>
>>36395345
Ironic that you're saying that. Lack of self-awareness much?
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If Luna visited my dreams she would see I want her to rule over her tyrant sister

Also that I love her very much, she is my inspiration
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>>36395356
Based frog poster is based.
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>>36395345
>"Let's see this one's dream and- wew! He's one of those that has to imagine me as a human at all costs. Into the trash it goes, can't marry someone that needs to project my likeness onto a generic human model and then delude himself into thinking it's me in order to find me attractive now, can I? I'm sure he'll find a girl willing to dye her hair blue if he insists enough. Next!"
>>
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>>36395464
Do me now.
>>
>>36394604
Please continue
>>
>>36395464
What if my dreams were about preserving the white race, what would Luna say?
>>
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>>36392641
Lunas has mesmerizing eyes, I would fall asleep everynight looking at them
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>>36395478
>"Mmh, this one at least posted the actual me. Odd picture choice, it shows he's seen through my regal, aloof and sometimes harsh facade, and he likes me for who I am. This tells me he's interested in Luna, and not the princess. How did he manage to get the picture, I'll never know. Nobody but sister and I gets to look at our family photo album, ponies have spent a night in the dungeons or have been asked if they like bananas for less. This anon must be skilled to have obtained such picture of myself. I don't find it creepy either, there were lewder pictures he could have stolen. I can tell he's not a pervert, and instead appreciates the cute and playful side of a thousand year-old alicorn."
>"All in all, a good candidate. Advance him to the next phase"

>>36395490
>"This one really seems to care about the wellbeing and continued existence of his peers. A bit obsessed maybe, but his heart is in the right place."
>"Does this mean he prefers white ponies though? Can't risk it, I'll forward his application to sister instead. I hope he likes food play and isn't prone to diabetes."
>>
Luna please stop raping me in my dreams.
>>
>>36395634
>his heart is in the right place
Luna would never support fascism, other than that funny writing
>>
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>Be Luna
>Enter Anon's dreams
>Surprise, its about you
>The dream you lays across Anon's lap, his hands gently petting her mane and stroking her coat
>Push her aside unceremoniously
>Obligingly take her place in Anon's lap
>Nice feelings shudder through your body as a long forgotten desire is sated
>'Yes, this is bliss' you think to yourself as you drift off to sleep
>>
>>36395693
This, this is the anon that would gain Luna's love, not >>36395478 >>36395634 the social retards thinking saying "do me" to someone you don't know is what counts as romancing.
>>
>>36395693
would her and dream luna fight over the spot?
>>
>>36395634
I like where this is going, what if Luna saw my dream was about me going
>rape
on her?
>>
i dont think god thought id use my autism for this
http://imgur.com/a/Q4FSauE
>>
>>36395805
I want to deflower that Luna
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>>36395805
Hot damn, great job
>>
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>>36395713
>socially retarded
If only I could pull it off on girls or women irl
And if I had an opportunity to romance Luna, I would do it in a heartbeat and damn the consequences

>>36395753
No, and I don't see any reason to. Dream luna would be like a living doll only meant for petting
>>
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Imagine unironically being so selfish that you waste Luna's perfection by shipping her with a m*nkey. She needs someone worthy.
>>
>>36395805
CULONA
>>
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>>36395838
Why are you so self-hating?
>>
>>36395838
Does twilight have a single thing in common with Luna?
>>
>>36395838
>dyke shipnigger calling anyone worthy
HAAHAH
>>
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>>36395921
Many things, such as being autistic and having complex relationship with Celestia.
>>36395869
Just pragmatic. I want the best for my waifu
>>
>>36395921
They are sharing a bespoke dildo.
>>
>>36395868
at least the art is cute
>>
>i want the best for my waifu
c u c k
>>
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>>36395943
barbie spammers and literal cucks. This is /moon/ in 2021.
>>
sorry for the delay, here's the rest of it
i'm really bad at time management
>>36394604
> she makes a face at the 'horse' comment, which she always does since you always say it, but it does little to dampen her good mood
> "Well Anon, if I were you I'd start packing my stuff right away - the train to Canterlot leaves tomorrow at ten in the morning so you'd better get started."
> you were going to ask her how she knew that but, knowing her, she probably checked ahead after reading through the scroll herself a few times and well before giving it to its intended recipient
> not that it bothered you that much
> as quickly as she came, twilight hopped off the sofa and trot her happy ass back up the stairs, closing the door ALMOST all the way but not quite, irritating you greatly
> fucking ponies

> 10 am
> ten in the morning
> the big one-zero
> bright and early, ready and willing, right as rain
> no train
> it had been a solid thirty minutes you were waiting at the station, earning curious looks from travelers coming different ways that hadn't seen or heard about the SIX FOOT TALL hairless ape living among them and thinking all sorts of crazy shit about you
> 'what is that?'
> 'does it eat meat?'
> 'how big is its-'
> "Anon! Fancy seein' you here, sugarcube. Where ya headed?"
> here comes applehorse, apple saddlebags no doubt filled with apples or something and all
"Nowhere special, AJ. Just got some royal business to take care of and then I'll be back here before you know it. You can have me all to yourself after I'm done, just how you like it."
> this, like always, got a ruse out of her and her cherry-tinted cheeks gave away what her immediately guarded expression tried not to tell you
> it was so easy, you just couldn't help yourself
> "A-ah don't know what yer talkin' about, anon. Now, in the middle of all that nonsense did you say somethin' about 'royal business'?"
>>
>>36396118
"Sure did. Why, you wanna come? I'm sure there's room for two in the cabin, and if not I can always just have you sit in my lap like you used to."
> sure enough, her cherry blush returned and she gave you a swift kick in the leg, which although not backed by the full brunt of her incredibly muscular body still stung like a bitch and was enough to end the rest of the 'embarrass the shit out of applejack' game
"Shit! All right, no more bullying. You know, I wouldn't ever say shit like that if you weren't so easy to mess with."
> applejack stuck her tongue out at you and readjusted her stetson, crossing a foreleg over her other rather smugly
> "And you should know better than to mess with a mare's heart, Anon."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyways, Twilight gave me the news this morning that I was 'royally summoned' by sunhorse up in Camelot and now I've been waiting for the train to take me there for about forty minutes, give or take some Applejack teasing."
> applejack's eyes grew about three times in size and she reared up to do that horse thing with her forelegs, a wild grin emblazoned across her tangerine face
> "Land sakes, Anon, yer really movin' up in the world, huh? Why, feels like just yesterday we were all sat down with Twi tryin' to find you somewhere to live and somethin' to do to make a livin' for yerself. Ah still can't believe you didn't take up our offer to stay at Sweet Apple Acres!"
> applejack's expression soured a little and she put a hoof up to her chin
> "Though, ah guess ah can't blame you fer thinkin' you're just not cut out for proper earth pony work, bein' all thin like you are. Ah bet you ain't never lifted anything heavier'n a book or two living in that library with Twi."
> 'did she just...?'
> did she just...?
"Did you just...?"
> "Did ah?"
>>
>>36396121
> just then, the sound of a steam engine blowing its loud obnoxious steam engine horn cleared the train station's inner building of occupants and a rush of ponies started flowing into and out of the passenger cars that'd just arrived
> applejack made her way off the platform and back into town, making you confused as to why she was in the station to begin with, but her smug little smile and wave made the questions evaporate under the heat of your frustration
"I'M NOT A FUCKING DYEL YOU ORANGE MENACE! WE'LL SEE WHO'S LAUGHING WHEN I DEADLIFT YOUR WHOLE ORCHARD!"
> if she could hear you, you couldn't tell, and her face disappeared with the others leaving the station
> the ponies nearby, however, very much could, and visibly shrunk back from your booming monkey voice
> "Sir, could you please keep it down in the station?"
> some other pony stallion had approached and prodded your chest with a hoof, and you nodded your head a little sheepishly before ducking into the train car and making your way to the back to be as invisible as possible
> onward to canterlot
>
> you'd seen a few big cities in your time
> dallas, nyc, etc.
> okay, you'd only seen TWO big cities
> but nothing could really compare to the pure spectacle that was canterlot in all her alabaster glory
> gold, royal purple and pearly accents assaulted your vision and you found yourself staring in awe at the marvel of architecture that was canterlot castle proper, hanging off the side of a cliff face in a fierce display of defiance to gravity that threatened to rip it right out of the mountain at its foundation
> there were hundreds of ponies around, all clearly too important to show you the time of day, which served you just fine
> there was also a noticeable presence of the royal guards here as well, which made sense being their capital and all
> all of them eyed with obvious apprehension, but it wasn't anything you weren't already used to
>>
>>36396125
> after stepping out of the train station with your luggage in tow (all of a suitcase and duffel bag), you approached one stony silver unicorn guard whose suspicion of you had condensed into a physical form of matter and you had to step over it to get to him
"Right, I get that you guys are all on edge about me showing up here but it's kinda surprising the Princess hasn't told you I'm supposed to be headed here on official business... or something."
> the guard fixes you with a blank stare, unmoving, unblinking, and even unbreathing for a solid five seconds before erupting in cold, raspy laughter
> "R-right! Ah, that's rich! You expect m-me to believe that the Princess- THE PRINCESS requested YOU to come to Canterlot on royal business? Man, they need to send some more of you guys over here so I can get my kicks in for the day - you have NO idea how boring it is being a guard in the travel district."
> "Well, I could have you moved if you'd like, Stormy Seas. I was told by your squad leader that you wished to be placed in the travel district to 'eye some foreign flank', as he put it. Was I mistaken?"
> at once, all the ponies in a five mile radius hit the deck like a mushroom cloud popped off in the distance and only when you saw the wide-eyed guard drop to the ground in reverent prostrate did you realize that it was probably Princess Celestia herself that had just chimed in from behind you
> sure enough, when you slowly turned to face the rear you looked up to see-
> well, actually, you weren't really looking up
"...Huh. Figured you'd be taller."
> behind you the guard hissed at you something along the lines of 'you idiot, do you know who you're talking to???' but you mostly ignored it
> the beautiful chime of womanly laughter hit your ears and much like those ponies kissing the floor earlier you were immediately taken aback by the difference in presence and posture Celestia had about herself
>>
>>36396130
> it was true that she was only just shy of your own height, but she still was taller than most, if not all other ponies and worthy of admiration for her impressive stature nonetheless
> you'd never stood beside a real horse, but you imagine it'd probably be about the same height-wise
> another shot of womanly laughter was injected into your bloodstream and a few bowed heads peaked up when they thought no one was watching to see what business their divine ruler had with some lanky nobody from off-world
> "And you're just as tall as I'd heard, perhaps taller. I trust you've found Equestria to be very hospitable and my ponies quite welcome so far, Anonymous?"
> you mull it over for a serious few seconds before shrugging
> "I've had worse."
> celestia cast her gaze long around the perimeter and cleared her throat, leaning down to whisper something into the ear of the guard who'd been licking the floor earlier
> he immediately snapped to attention and, rendering a weird hoof salute gestured for you two to follow before starting off down the road at a steady trot, which you and celestia both fell behind
> "Well, I suppose a more formal introduction will be in order at some other time, but for now I'll offer you my name and title as Princess Celestia of Equestria and my hospitality while you're here in Canterlot. I'm not sure if my student, Twilight Sparkle, made you aware, but you may be here for quite some time, Anonymous."
> you hold a hand up, offering an exaggerated pose in response
"Listen, Celestia - Celly? Can I call you that? You're going to be my employer for the foreseeable future and all, but that doesn't mean we can't just be friends. I'm not a pony, and I'm not your subject, and as one sentient being to another I think we can agree that a more casual approach to this whole thing would benefit us more than shallow pleasantries and played-out formalities would, right? I mean, you've gotta be sick of all that by now."
>>
>>36396134
> rocky road or whatever his name was spun around on the spot and looked like he was going to impale you with his horn but celestia interrupted him before he could gut you proper
> "I think that's a wonderful idea, Anonymous. May I call you Anon, then?"
"For sure. Anyways, are you gonna tell me about this job here or are we going to small talk all the way to the castle gate?"
> "Well, it's really quite simple..."
>
>
>
> and now here you are, sitting at the longest dinner table you've ever seen between two of the most important creatures on the planet and things couldn't be more awkward
> no, not because it was weird being around royalty - it was hard to really take pony princesses seriously considering, i mean, the fact that they were ponies and all
> it was most definitely because these two clearly had the most tenuous, strained relationship you'd ever seen between two blood-related siblings
> you weren't quite sure what kind of bad blood was there but it was definitely something that would take a lot of patience and time to figure out
> that was exactly what you were supposed to be there to do, unfortunately
> sunbutt briefed you on the situation during the long walk back to the castle
> essentially, you're to be a sort of mediator between celestia and her younger sister, luna, who's been 'out' for a while
> the exact details of where she went and what went down between her and her sister weren't made clear to you and everyone you've asked so far has been tight-lipped and hush-mouthed
> if you had known anything about the job beforehand you would have just asked bookhorse before you left, but those rather important details were decidedly left out of the impromptu telegram you were given
> ...or maybe it was in the fine print you didn't get a chance to read
> oh well
"Well ladies, it's been as pleasurable an evening as any but I think it's about time I get some shut-eye. You know us humans - early to bed, early to rise, all that..."
>>
>>36396137
> as quickly as you slipped out of your seat and began walking towards your brand new castle room you were wrapped in a honey glow and deposited right back into your gilded dining chair
> "Anon, if you leave now you won't be able to try any of the dessert! Why, I had the chefs whip up something special this evening to commemorate your employment here at the castle - I think you're going to love it."
> these words were, on the surface level, very polite and well-spoken, but behind them was a very obvious threat
> 'stay here and do your fucking job' is what they roughly translated to
"...Right. Uh."
> you turn to luna, who has been eyeing the whole exchange from her decidedly far seat at the opposite end of the table with an unreadable expression
> the mare in question was, well, kind of a show stopper like her sister
> there was the telling unicorn horn and thick, feathery wings all alicorns were apparently known for, which set them apart from the rest of the common horse fare
> probably
> her blank stare was a little off-putting and you'd seen precious little signs of life from her aside from the rise and fall of her barrel which told you that she was, in fact, breathing and not just a weird wax replica that everyone decided to pretend was real
> she was a little smaller in frame but her ethereal mane of stars and swirling galaxies caught your attention more than once during your painful introduction to each other earlier, though if she'd seen you staring she didn't let on or just didn't care
> 'anon, this is princess luna... luna, this is anonymous. he'll be working here from now on as an informal aide to the throne, so please don't hesitate to ask him for advice or even just some friendly chatter.'
> this of course was a cover
> your real job was to try to get her talking again and have the two make up, but she didn't need to know that apparently
> luna had been just as receptive to that conversation as she was now
>>
>>36396140
> (that means she wasn't receptive at all)
> speaking of which, it seemed like celestia asked her a question just now
>
>
>
> silence
> celestia's awkward smile was matched by luna's perfect poker face and the two held their expressions for a few moments before celestia quietly chuckled to herself and daintily stuck another bite of whatever the fuck in her mouth
> the food before you was some mixture of oats, egg whites and waffles
> better dig in before you get magic whipped for disrespecting the meal or something
> celestia told you beforehand that she liked to eat breakfast at dinner sometimes to 'make luna feel a little better' or something
> didn't really seem to work though, and by the time you finished your food it was clear that she wasn't going to touch her plate
> sun horse was about to say something but was interrupted by the rough clatter of utensils and the scooting of a wooden chair that signified an end to the awkward dinner, luna leaving her full plate behind and very deliberately trotting off to the inner castle
> "Sister..."
> celestia's sullen voice plucked at your hearstrings, and you eyed her sister's abandoned dinner while contemplating bringing the plate and following after her
"I can bring her food to her if you want."
> she shook her head, neatly wiping the corners of her mouth with a magicked napkin and scooting away from her place at the table herself
> "No, that's all right Anon. I'll have somepony bring her some food later, when she's a little more receptive - she did just wake up, after all."
> you weren't quite following but didn't ask any more questions and departed from the table yourself, pushed aside by the castle staff as they cleaned up the remains of your ill-fated banquet as quickly as possible before disappearing into the kitchen
"So, uh..."
>>
>>36395753
they'd [inadvertantly lewdly] learn to share anon's affection
>>
>>36396142
> "This may be short notice, like everything else, but at some point you will need to align your schedule with Luna's so that you can be with her more hours of the day and perhaps get her to open up to you. You may take some time to adjust as needed, though. I've seen to your room in the guest wing, so you may stay there during your time here in Canterlot. You're also welcome to any of the castle amenities should you feel the need to explore, and you can see the rest of Canterlot whenever you're not working here with us. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner are served at regular times and you may snack as you like from the kitchen as well. Do you have any questions, Anon?"
> you shake your head, the idea of sleeping this awkward night away seeming better and better the more you think about it
> "Well, I'm sorry for how things went this evening, but I hope someday we can all have dinner like this again with smiles on our faces."
> celestia offers you a hopeful smile despite the sour dinner and elegantly strides off in the direction of what you assume must be her bedchambers, flanked by guards that were posted silently throughout the room during your meal
> you'd forgotten about them really since they were so quiet
> and now you were all alone
> well, you've certainly got your work cut out for you
and that's all i've got for today. the basic idea is that, of course, celestia and luna have a really poor relationship after the whole banishment but i like to think that celestia didn't choose what the elements of harmony did - they just kind of acted on their own. so here we have two sisters, one who's incredibly remorseful and guilty at the fact that she had no idea her sister was going to end up on the moon and she was powerless to get her back, and one who's essentially a shell of a pony after being stuck in space, isolated for a thousand years - then there's anon between it all
>>
>>36396154
Think this is an interesting concept. I look forward to your future updates!
>>
>>36396060
Meanwhile the other princess general is suspiciously devoid of all the problems, and what's more they blatantly invade other threads.

Hmmm, this is very weird Batman.
>>
>>36396226
>points out no hooves but doesn't address no teats
Ngmi
>>
>>36396273
You're not fooling anyone, barbienigger.
>>
Well anons, do you?
>>
>>36396409
Absolutely, a million times over, Luna is simply so sweet, so amazing, so sincere. There is no way any of the other princesess even come close to dirt under her hooves.
>>
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>>36396058
>>36396060
Imagine being so self absorbed that you don't want the best for her and only see her as a means to the ends of getting your dick wet.
>>36396409
Yes. And that's why I want to give her the second best princess.
>>
>>36395678
Bad bait, but fucking really?
>>
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>154 new posts
oh boy, what now
>>
stop posting so much
>>
>>36396154
I'm looking forward to more. Anon sounds more like your usual AiE dickhead, so there should be some more good keks. I'm not sure I've ever seen a green where Luna and Celestia have to be helped with their relationship upon her return from banishment. I suppose a vast majority of us (myself included) always took the first two episodes for granted and never thought much of it beyond that. So you have my attention.

Sorry about the mess in here - and I hope it doesn't scare you off. We're normally one of the more calm and chill generals, but /moon/ has unfortunately had some idiots take up residence very recently and start spraying shit all over the walls.
>>
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>>36396190
>>36396539
preciate the feedback. i write at work so i'm not sure how much i'll actually feel like updating but with anons looking forward to more that's inspiration enough to make me want to keep it going. like i said though, if you've got any ideas or whatever feel free to pitch them my way and i'll see what i can do. i've never written more than a few short greens for friends so it'll be a fresh experience trying to keep a cohesive story going throughout. more to come in the next few days hopefully
i fucking love luna
>>
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>>36396534
>50 unique ips in the same /moon/day
If anything, I am glad Luna gets this much love and attention, she far surpasses her inferior sister

She is truly most lovable pony. I love /moon/!
>>
>>36396518
Fuck off faggot.
>>
>>36396548
>write at work
Well damn, that's the same thing I do. I've finally caught something of a break myself and have a bit more time to actually write again. All I can say is there's no rush; I can't speak for every writer, but from my experience, writing is like a fart - push too hard and all you're going to get is shit. Slow and steady tends to be better, especially when it comes to longer greens.
>I fucking love Luna
But I love Luna, too.
I'll fite u, boi.
>>
>the absolute state of /moon/.
At the rate this thread is moving, I'm not sure if I'll finish my next update before the thread hits the bump limit, but know I'm working on it. Inspiration is flowing like a goddamn fire hose. Really excited for the opening scene. There will be stockings. And teats. And Sammy Hagar. Not necessarily in that order.

>>36396154
You've made me giggle a few times. Keep it up!
>>
I have to ask - why are people replying to the human poster? It's already been made perfectly clear no one wants it, and yet people keep giving him the attention and the giggle he's looking for.

Stop spamming the >no hooves, stop replying to him period. Just report for trolling or off-topic and hide it. At some point, the jannies will either do their fucking job and listen to the massive amounts of reports or make it clear that human/barbie/egg is allowed everywhere because they suck massive amounts of dick.

Stop killing off /moon/ with replies that don't do anything aside from show the shitposter he's getting the response he wants. God damn.
>>
>>36394061
Sadly, she doesn't exist in this universe, I can only talk to the moon and pretend that she can hear me in my dreams.
>>
>>36396778
But this IS my thread.
>>
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>>36396792
They'll never understand, Anon.
>>
>>36396801
>Keep it pony
Fuck off to your own thread faggot.
>>
>>36396804
Are you fucking blind or just trolling? I'm posting princess Luna in princess Luna's thread, maybe you should fuck off back to your safe zone?
>>
>>36396813
>I'm posting princess Luna in princess Luna's thread
No, you are not. You are posting weeb garbage in what is supposed to be the Luna thread. Even the OP says to take your fucking shit somewhere else.
>>
>>36396816
It's not your personal thread, I can post what I like, you should fuck off.
>>
>>36396819
Go make your own fucking thread. This one is dedicated to Luna, the pony. If you can't do that go somewhere else.
>>
oh my god the shitposter is trenchfag
>>
>>36396822
This thread was never dedicated to only a pony version of Luna, you autistic turbonewfag.
>>
>>36396836
This thread is dedicated to Luna, who is a pony. Read the fucking OP.
>>
>>36396839
Fuck off already with your nonsense.
>>
>>36396848
Fuck off with your non-Luna posting. You can make your own thread and yet you come here to post shit in the thread.
>>
I told you faggots, all it would do is draw even more attention from someone who is here for the sole purpose of shitposting. But nooooooo you just had to put a big neon sign in the op that dougs will cause anger here.
Great job op. Maybe next time you could head into a bunch of other threads to advertise it too?
>>
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>>36396801
Post ponies, and ships.
>>
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>Autopony and reggie hide their usernames the moment they start insulting human luna posters
How brave
>>
>>36396919
lmao this
>>
>>36396919
Who are those? Discordfags?
>>
>>36396861
It's the same guy doing it as last thread, dude. You act as if we now have a massive influx of new posters putting shit in here - and right now, it's stands at 58 posters. I've seen plenty of /moon/ threads surpass 90 unique ip posters. Shows it's not many people doing it, and the bullshit in here with people replying to the troll is repelling some of our normal posters. The OP blurb at least give a reason for reporting - off-topic, as if trolling wasn't enough.

But yeah, fuck me, let's just keep arguing with the jackass. At least this thread will die sooner. I'm about fed up with this shit.
>>
>>36396919
Oh, so this whole thing is discord bullshit? Go back.
>>
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Friendly reminder that this shitstorm is being forced by people either so new to 4chan they don't know basic rules like 'don't feed the fucking troll you retard holy shit', or possibly by a couple chucklefucks coordinating it offsite for shits and giggles, it's really hard to tell crippling autism and a complete lack of self control apart from active malice. Both in behavior and results. You can see the start very clearly by looking two threads ago.

https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/36280250/#36282931
>first humanized post, literally zero replies
https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/36280250/#36303073
>second humanized post five entire days later, a couple comments about the wip statue
https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/36280250/#36327206
>third humanized post six entire days later, one singular reply from a canned reaction image
https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/36280250/#36334411
>two days later the faggots are here to wreck the thread. the "is that obvious luna humanization really luna? I don't think its luna bro" idiot and his best friend "i'm just posting what i like bro, maybe you're the one that doesn't like luna bro" both appear out of nowhere AT THE SAME TIME and drop 20 posts of pointless fucking bickering in half an hour.
>fifteen entire fucking days later they're still doing it, only now other anons have gotten involved too so it's self perpetuating
You see this face? This is the face she's making right now as she reads the thread.

>>36396946
Here's to hoping anons get sick of actively feeding the troll the attention he desires.
>>
>>36396961
they'll get tired eventually. they always do.
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>>36396961
Stop your whining and stop shitting up all the fucking thread on this board with your >no hooves bullshit.
>>
>>36396946
>>36396961
>>36396977
Why do you not mention that there is pretry clear evidence some posters from /sun/ are behind this? We have every indication it is the case.
>call out sun
>post deleted user banned
>even mention /sun/ at all
>get deleted and banned
Don't you see? It is not a coincidence anymore.
There are crossposters here, they admitted to it themselves, segregation exists for a reason, different groups can'r coexist together. /moon/ should be for lovers of the moon only, sun only tries to start shit. WAKE UP.

I don't care to become a martyr. My post will be deleted too and you will just ignore it. Only posts calling out /sun/ get purged, so it is not eqg fags doing this, it is sun fags trying to pit moonchads and eqglads against each other. It is their doing.

t. Anon who just wants peace and to be left alone, no more crossposting
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>>36396961
those first three are me desu
>>
>>36396957
/mlp/ has a discord ?
>>
>>36397013
No. Discords are Discords and not /mlp/.
>>
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>>36396997
>posters from /sun/ are behind this
>literally the same people visit both threads
Are you a detective?
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I... just want to chime in to say I don't mind the eqg posters, and mind you I don't have a single barbie pic saved to my galleries. I am just glad more people care about Luna, other generals are dying while we have been booming for months.

We have to remember friendship is, at the end of the day, the best way to solve an issue. And we can all benefit from more posters and content creators.
>>
>>36397021
As long as they are posting Luna and not EQG or humanoids.
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>>36396997
Take your meds.
>>
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>>36396991
>>36397019
Stop posting that whore alongside best princess. You're worse than the barbieposters.
>>
>>36396997
If we have clear evidence, where is it? What posts are you talking about? Screencaps?

Because you keep making the accusations that it is /sun/ doing this, and yours are the ONLY posts mentioning it. /sun/ and /moon/ have crossposted sisters for a number of years now - and we've even offered each other refuge when one thread or the other hits bump limit. Not to mention even then, posts STILL almost always contain both sisters.

What the fuck does it matter where they're from, anyways? A troll is a troll. So your argument makes no sense aside from attempting to create a rift between generals that have coexisted and interacted without issue for years.
>>
>>36397037
>You're worse than the barbieposters.
Kek. Not even close.
>>
>>36397040
>tia banished luna for a thousand years
>expecting the anons that adore tia to not bully us in the end too
Times change, people change man, we have to accept they don't mean good amymore.
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>>36397037
Why are you shitting up this thread? Fuck off already
>>
>>36397040
An impartial flutterchad made a post pointing out some weird stuff about /sun/ getting special benefits and trolling the board for months. His post was deleted so fast it didn't even register in desuarchive.

If you check the archice for all deleted posts last thread and this thread, they are all /sun/ related. ONLY PEOPLE COMPLAINING ABOUT SUN GET DELETED.

But sure, keep mindlessly defending them like an abused wife. Truly it is just a coincidence that the only posts getring deleted are the ones calling out sun on the trolling.

Heh, I guess the holodomor didn't happen by your standards either, since the mod (Stalin) purged all evidence russians were trolling ukranians.

Grow up.
>>
>>36397067
Go somewhere else.
>>
Why is it that even with proof that our threads have been hijacked by autists looking to derail them you people still respond to bait so easily literally just ignore the posts, don’t respond, don’t call anyone a schizo, don’t tell anyone to fuck off, are you really so sensitive that you can’t deal with seeing a post you don’t like for the sake of not derailing the thread? It’s not like you’re going to make them stop either, it’s like this is your first week on the internet. Shut up and continue to post best pone
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I love Luna so much. I would fight you all to death and win on pure adrenaline just to be her first boyfriend and take her virginity.
>>
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>>36397143
>virginity
>Luna
Anon...
>>
>>36397151
Unironically fuck off to your general, Faust never said anything on Luna's virginity unlike Tia, so don't try to shit on moonbutt just because you are jealous.
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>>36397151
>insulting luna's purity
Oh come the fuck on, if you don't love moon why are you even here
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>>36397092
I don't understand it either.
>>
When will the janny clean this thread?
>>
>>36397177
Excuse are you complaining about them? Why? They are doing a good job. No rules are being broken. If you are gonna mindlessly complain then I hope you face the consequences.
>>
>>36397181
Two things:
1) This thread is about Luna. Not some human/anime nonsense
2) The OP explicitly reminds EQGfags to keep to their own threads.
>>
>>36397163
So cute.
>>
>>36397190
>he thinks post policing will make the rules of the board change
I SHIGGY DIGGY
>>
>>36397221
Keep on topic to the thread. That is: Luna. Not some human or anime character or gorilla in a blue wig. But Luna.
>>
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>a couple barbies get posted in the /sun/ offshoot (not even the actual general, just a random thread)
>instantly deleted
>meanwhile the literal garbage that comprises about half of this thread gets to stay up
der ewige sunfag hauswart
>>
>>36397156
I can guarantee this poster right here is the one going into sister threads to mention this.
>>
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>>36397239
This
>>36397040
>>36396961
>>36396681
>>36396690
What more evidence do you want? Like seriously, they are the ones fucking with us.
>>
>Check /moon/ for response from writefag.
>It's just tons of bickering and accusations.
I probably won't have anything to post this week, and I can't anyways since someone got my desktop banned for a shitty sarcastic reply to someone accusing me of being underage. So it's pure mobileposting for a month unless my ban gets lifted. I'm dipping the fuck out of this mess anyways, I can't stand seeing it. Both sides (or whoever is partaking in these arguments, for a better terminology) should be fucking ashamed that this is still carrying on. I'll post a link to my ponepaste when I got something done, but I need a reprieve from this misery.

For the record, I've been here since 2012, started writing in 2013. I remember the bullshit that existed when Noctis was posting. We're getting to that point of absurdity. And I'll also mention that it was not uncommon for human Luna to be posted in these threads - but it was respectfully sparingly. Yes, you had the memer that would post >no hooves, but it ended there - a light jab without someone feeling the need to post another human pic out of spite. This has been blown way the fuck out of proportion by both sides for no fucking reason other than pure autism or pure trolling. Or both.
>>
>>36397249
It is an EQG/human poster spamming both threads. The only difference is that one of the threads gets cleaned up.
>>
>>36397255
Based, fuck these tards for ruining our threads
>>
>>36397255
>show username again when acting all morally superior
>take it off when insulting /moon/bros
Are you le puppet master or something?

Plus you still not dare call out the white horse general anyway. Your post was all for nothing.
>>
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>>36397255
You're actually retarded if you believe it's two sides and not just a clusterfuck of people screaming into the void and forming a storm for shitposters to capitalize on.
>>
>>36397277
I post in /sun/ - have for a long time, and will continue to do so. I love Tia almost as much as Luna. Only one has my heart in a romantic sense.

And why would I go through the trouble of starting shit and then acting superior? I'm no better than anyone else, I dont have power. I don't get paid. I'm not "famous" by any means for what I write - nor will I be (nor do I want to be "famous," for that matter). I write because I want to, I'm here because I love Luna. I dont get my rocks off on being "popular" on a Mongolian basket-weaving forum, or FiMFiction - or the internet period. I namefag when I got an update on what I'm doing in terms of writing, offering feedback on someone's work, or have an idiot moment and forget to delete the name field.

>>36397316
>Both sides (or whoever is partaking in these arguments, for a better terminology)
>>
>>36396710
>stop replying to him period
That would be the smart thing to do.
People aren't smart.
>>
>>36397384
>loving another female when you already have Luna
Romantically or not, you can stay with your sunbuddies since you defend them more than you defend us
>>
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>>36397418
Goodnight beautiful princess <3
>>
>>36397418
More like good morning Luna, I dreamt of you.
>>
>>36397255
>I probably won't have anything to post this week
You probably wouldn't have time to post it anyway, judging at how fast this thread is going. Thank you for the heads up anyways.
> a shitty sarcastic reply to someone accusing me of being underage
Yeah, don't do that. Mods don't pick up on that unless they enter the thread and see the whole conversation.
>This has been blown way the fuck out of proportion by both sides
>both sides
Disagree. We have some regulars who don't mind humanized but this isn't them. Haven't you noticed that the topic of the trolling keeps flip flopping between humanized spam, "/sun/fags are attacking!!1" and "Luna is a virgin"?
>>
>>36397384
>Mongolian basket weaving
Get with the current year and times, stupid boomer. This site has long switched its focus to being a New Zealand chicken farming site.
>>
>>36397239
>>36397249
Samefagging should be bannable offense.
>>
>>36397249
>mobileshitter kid
Always fucking zoomer subhumans.
>>
>>36397905
>Is Luna a virgin?

>You are Anon; tabloid journalist slash Photographer for the Dale-lee Boogle, a trashy paper if your victims had their say, but only because you do the one thing others don’t. You deal in HARD facts. No made up shit.
>The phones are ringing off the hook, and ponies are scrambling about. A typical work day as far as you’re concerned.
>You’re at your desk that resembles a toddlers in comparison to your size, putting the finishing touches on your latest story: “Dirty Wonderbolts get dirtier in the showers!”
>”Hey Anon!”
>You look up from your typewriter to see Jane Maneitz waving a hoof at you from across the room.
>”The chief wants to see you!”
>You groan. You hate the chief.
>Begrudgingly,you get up and head to his office.
>Upon entering after knocking, a gruff, aged stallion with a flat top-
>”PARKEEEEEEEERRRRRR-“
“It’s Anon chief. I don’t know who this Parker is you keep yelling at me!”
>”That’s not important right now Parker, there’s news out there that needs to be reported! Why aren’t you reporting it?! What do I pay you for?!”
>The motherfu-
“Chief, you sent me to find out about the Wonderbolt orgies! I got pictures and very, very unpleasant firsthand experience that will take hours of therapy to forget and-“
>”BLAH BLAH BLAH! Scrap that story! Time to address the questions Ponues really want to know!”
>You want to protest more, but just sigh in resignation.
“Alright. What is it?”
>”Listen up Parker, the newest, hottest, most interesting topic as of late is PRINCESS LUNA.”
“Luna? What about her?”
>”The public is asking questions she’s not answering! They demand answers, and as a credible news source, it’s our duty-neigh our RESPONSIBILITY to provide those answers, and with great power, comes great responsibility as you always say-“
“I’ve never said that.”
>He waves you off.
>”Potatoes, Tomatoes! Anyway, Parker I need you to investigate Luna!”
1/2
>>
>>36397239
>der ewige sunfag hauswart
Don't write german ever again.

>>36397255
>So it's pure mobileposting for a month unless my ban gets lifted
Can't you just evade the ban?
>>
>>36398005
“Okay, but what am I investigating about her?”
>He presents a list for you to look at while lighting a dandelion cigar. You can smoke dandelions...?
>In any case you look at the list, and furrow your brow in annoyance. The questions are, to put it gently-
“Chief...are you serious? These questions are absolutely retarded! I mean-“is Luna a virgin”? “Does Luna SHIT out Big stinky, stacks of doodoo butter bricks”? “IS LUNA DEAD”?!?!”
>He blows out a puff of smoke.
>”Indeed my colt! Very retarded! That’s where the big bits are! Now get out there and get me those answers Parker!”
>You look at him as if he just announced the latest Diablo game was coming out on phone.
>”Huh? Was there something else Parker?”
“....No chief.”
>”THEN GET MOVING PARKER! WHAT DO I PAY YOU FOR?!?”
“Not enough for this bullshit...”
>You mutter as you leave his office to start this aspergers ridden quest to get answers to these “hard-hitting” inquiries.
“I need a new job.”
>>
>>36398053
IS LUNA DEAD sounds like the first thing that pops up when you search Luna on google.
>>
>>36398053
Fantastic, thank you Anon.
>>
>>36398070
Yeah. That’s the joke.
>>
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>>36398080
That sounds logical.
>>
>>36398089
It’s fine as long as you got it and you were able to have a quick chuckle
>>
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>Thread filled with trolls and bait casted haphazardly
>Thread also equally filled with butthurt
it's pretty funny, certainly picked up from how inactive this general used to be
>pic related is mfw
>>
>>36398013
They rescinded my ban - after 26 hours of waiting for a response.
I was content to wait it out anyway, considering I was dumb enough to forget sarcasm doesn't translate well to words on a computer screen.
I don't know how to change an IP or evade a ban that detects an IP, so fuck if I know. I'm a boomer disguised as a 30-year-old - there's a reason why of the three and a half cars I own, only one is younger than me.

>>36397921
You damn kids and your silly fads.
>>
>>36397418
>>
>>36398053
>”PARKERRRRR!”
>>
>>36398144
You can’t post cute Luna while talking about negative things!
>>
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>>36398070
The actual results are so much better.
Well, /moon/? Is she autistic?
>>
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>>36398502
>does princess luna have a daughter
>does princess luna get married
>is princess cadence luna's daughter
>who is princess luna boyfriend
>>
>>36398524
All the HARD-HITTING Questions ponies want to know
>>
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>>36398502
Kek, these are mine
>>
>>36398502
>>36398524
>>36398528

When will she stop dodging these inquiries and give the public the answers they seek? She’ll have to answer someday!
>>
>>36398502
I get pretty much the same without the boyfriend or married stuff.
>>
>>36398536
Allow her some privacy!
Her private life is not yours meddle in
>>
>>36398555
The public has the right to know! Don’t try to stifle free speech and freedom of press by censoring our journalistic integrity to learn the truth to important questions your average everyday stallion asks. Earth-shattering questions that shake the very foundation of our society like “Is Cadence, princess Luna’s daughter”!
>>
>>36398536
>You often ponder whether or not a thousand years of banishment was really the worst thing Celestia could have done.
>And after holding Night Court for the last week or so, you have decided that being pressured to hold Night Court was probably worse than a millennium of stasis.
>"Princess Luna, I appreciate that you are growing frustrated, but these are pressing questions that ponies need answers to."
"And how," you say as you drag a hoof down your face, stretching the bags under your eyes, "is whether or not I am 'heavier' than my dear sister a matter of significance worthy of the royal court?"
>"It is not for us to decide that, princess; we merely relay the most pressing matters of the day to you, and at the moment this is what ponies wish to know."
"Canterlot ponies, or ponies from all over Equestria?"
>"From all over, your highness."
"Very well," you suck in a deep breath, then let it out, "proceed."
>"Will you be attending the gala this year?"
"Yes."
>"Are you going to be wearing a green dress?"
"No."
>"What is your cutie mark?"
"A crescent moon."
>"Why is it not a full moon?"
"Fate alone knows."
>"Is Princess Celestia your mother?"
"I... No, she is not."
>"Is Lauren Faust your mother?"
"I don't know who that is."
>"Are you dead?"
>You stare at the royal herald for a long time.
>He waits patiently for your response.
"...No, I am not dead."
>"Do you have a coltfriend?"
"Not currently."
>"Will you be my marefriend?"
"...Was that a proposition, herald, or merely one of the inquests?"
>"That was one of the inquests, your highness."
"No."
>"Will you be my marefriend?"
"You already--"
>"That one was actually me."
"The answer is still no."
>"Are you allergic to the sun?"
"No."
>"How many hooves am I holding up?"
>He holds up a single hoof.
"One."
>"And how many hooves am I holding up -now-?"
>He hides his hoof behind his head.
"...Still one."
>>
>>36398590
>"She's good," he mutters under his breath.
>Your eyes drift to the small alarm clock you had taken to having beside your throne.
>Hours yet remain of the Night Court.
>You repress a shudder and look back to the herald.
>"Is the sun your fetish?"
"No."
>"Have you ever kissed Celestia."
"N--... No."
>He cocks an eyebrow at you.
>You glare at him.
>He gulps and continues on.
>"Is Princess Cadence your daughter?"
"Certainly not."
>"Is Shining Armor your son?"
"No."
>"When is your birthday?"
>You manage a small smile.
"The twelfth day of January."
>"What is your last name?"
"Imperia."
>"How old are you?"
"Older than you, child."
>"...Princess Luna--"
"You ought not ask a lady her age, herald; it is considered rude."
>"R-right."
>He looks down at his list, and blinks.
>For a while he regards it dumbly, not sure what to say.
"Is there a problem, herald?"
>"I, uh, n-not as such?"
"Is the question inappropriate?"
>"Not really, well I'm not sure, actually."
>You let out a weary sigh.
"Ask it."
>He wets his lips and looks up at you.
>"...Are you autistic?"
>You take a deep, calm breath through your nose, and gently let it out past your lips.
"No, herald, I am not autistic."
>"...Are you sure--"
>The alarm clock, briefly airborne on account of a rush of blue magic, smashes dead-centre in the middle of his forehead with a resounding 'clang'; cogs, sprockets, and springs showering the floor as he drops to the tiles with a yelp.
>You rise from your throne and address the stunned guards and few remaining nobles that had yet to speak in a frosty tone.
"Night Court has ended. It will resume tomorrow evening at the same time. I trust you will not bother me with inane questions?"
>The nobles all nod hastily.
"Good. Have a pleasant evening."

Poor Luna. She tries so hard.
>>
>>36398590
>>36398594
My god I’m so happy we’re trying to make this a thing now. This is hilarious
>>
>>36398617
Threadly retarded Q&A with Luna when?
>>
>>36398647
>Threadly
You can only ask the same questions so many times.
>>
>>36395921
Complex relationship with celestia
Being alone for a portion of time
Ex-introverts
Probably bookish too
>>
>>36398647
Why won't you drop your name?
>>
>>36398665
I didn’t even notice he had a name until you said something
>>
>>36398665
forgot, my bad
>>
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>>36398590
>>36398594
Good shit. Moar pls.
Also:
I need to ask experts about this. Vanilla non-flowy mane Luna or corporeal magic mane Luna? Personally I prefer vanilla.
>https://www.strawpoll.me/42432815
>>
>>36398690
Don’t wanna run it dead. I think that’s a good stopping point.
>>
>>36398590
>"And how many hooves am I holding up -now-?"
>He hides his hoof behind his head.
>"...Still one."
I'm imagining some pretty sick acrobatics.
This is some good shit. Been some time since I've read a good and short comedy green.
>>
>>36398690
Both are great.
>>
>>36398617
"I am pleased to see you in good health, herald."
>The royal herald sways slightly, the off-white gauze wrapped tightly around his head and secured with a giant safety pin stand in stark contrast to his grey coat and dusky blue mane.
>"Glad to... glad to still be here, Princess Luna."
>You nod at him and straighten your back, assessing the room.
"Shall we begin with the night's inquests?"
>He nods, wincing slightly, and waving forward the first noble.
>An older stallion, dressed in the sort of finery one would expect of the aristocracy, stands before you confidently.
>He holds his top hat in the crook of his foreleg and clears his throat, addressing you in a pleasingly straight-forward manner.
>"Princess Luna, thank you for allowing me this opportunity to speak."
"You are most welcome, subject; I trust that my counsel will be of use to you."
>"I believe it will. The Canterlot Chamber of Commerce has convened to discuss recent developments following your reappearance; it seems that with her highness' presence, ponies have a renewed interest in night-time activities, and this presents an opportunity to capitalise; done properly, this will bolster local businesses within Canterlot, as well as provide an increase to tax revenue for the royal coffers."
>You allow a small smile, pleased to finally be addressing something important.
"I would be most interested to hear your proposals, my good stallion. What do you wish to know?"
>"The Chamber is still discussing the specifics, and it may be some days before we decide on a collective plan of action, but until then we had but one question of great importance we needed your appraisal of."
"Of course! Ask away."
>"Would you rather fight one dragon-sized Celestia, or a hundred parasprite-sized Celestias?"
>...
>The stallion is limply dragged out of the chamber by a pair of royal guardsponies en route to the infirmary, his formerly well-shaped hat now securely up his bottom.
>>
>>36398766
>You scowl at the room before you, your good mood effectively ruined.
>The herald clears his throat nervously.
>Your eyes narrow at him.
>"If... If it would please her highness, there are thirty one more subjects to be seen this evening."
>The next noble steps forth timidly, flashing you a fearful grimace as your eyes bore into him.
>Though your voice is low, all in the room hear you as you softly utter:
"Begin."

>"Are you a unicorn?"
"No."

>"Are you Nightmare Moon?"
"Not... not anymore."

>"Why did you make friends with Nightmare Moon?"
"Did you not hear the last pony? She was I, but I am not she, anymore."

>"Why did your hair change?"
"It took a few days for my form to revert to its ordinary mature state upon my return from banishment."

>"What was it like on the moon?"
"I was not -on- the moon, I was magically sealed within it."

>"What does the moon taste like?"
"I do not know."

>"Why are you so popular?"
"I... I was not aware that I was."
>You glance away from the mare before you and look uncertainly to the herald.
>He gives you a reassuring nod and a smile, wincing slightly as he does so.
>You feel a faint blush and clear your throat into a hoof, trying not to let it show.
"Thank you for letting me know, my dear lady."
>"You're most welcome, your highness."
"Do you require anything else?"
>"Oh! Yes, one more thing."
"Oh?"
>"How old are you?"

>"How many alarm clocks do you have, and please can you throw one at me like you did at that mare just now?"
"I had but a single clock tonight, but there shall be more, I assure you."

>"What is your favourite colour?"
"Blue."

>"Would you rather explode or drown?"
"What in the blazes...?"

>"How many foals do you think you could beat up at once?"
>You stare in silence at the stallion before you.
>Then put a hoof to your chin as you find yourself seriously considering how many you could take in a fight.
>>
>>36398772
>"Are you my mother?"
"No. I have no children."
>"Could I call you 'mommy' anyway?"
"Guard!" you shout to your side, "Get me another alarm clock!"

>"If I have three apples, and I eat two apples, how many apples am I left with?"
"...One?"
>"Oooh!" the filly nods excitedly and scribbles down her answer on her homework sheet.
"How did you even get in? Who granted this filly an audience; herald?!"

>"How many foals do you think you could take in a fight?"
"We've already--... Twenty thousand. More if I was fully-armoured."
>"Nice."

>"Are you bad?"
"I was."
>"Why are you not bad anymore?"
"Because being bad is... bad."
>"Why is bad, bad?"
"Bad is bad because bad is bad."
>"Baddy bad?"
"Bad badda bad."
>"Babdadbad"
"Babb-- what devilry is this-- guards! Arrest her for witchcraft!"

>"How are you?"
>...
>You blink and cock your head.
>The last noble stands before you.
>A slight, rather old stallion; dressed in rather simple clothes compared to his predecessors.
>He waits patiently for you to answer, and when you do not he ventures his question again.
>"I, uh, I said how are you?"
"I am... well. I am doing well."
>"Are you glad to be back with your sister?"
>A faint smile graces your lips.
"I am."
>"Did you miss her?"
"I... did. I missed her very much."
>"I'm glad you came back, Princess. It's nice to see that Princess Celestia is smiling again."
>You frown at him.
"What do you mean?"
>He shrugs and glances around at the now largely empty room.
>"She was always smiling before, but as long as I've lived here it always seemed forced; like she was acting happy just to keep the rest of us at peace. Now that you're back, it's the first time I've ever seen her genuinely smile."
>>
>>36398778
>...
>"Princess Luna?"
>Your head hangs low, and you desperately try not to let the noble see the tears welling in your eyes.
>It doesn't work, and you can't help but let out a small sob.
>You hear movement, and glance up again to see both he and the herald, as well as a few of your personal guard, standing at the foot of the dais, regarding you with worry.
>"Are you alright?" the noble asks once more, his voice soft, and tender eyes searching.
>You give them all a quivering smile.
"Y-yes, I'm... I'm fine."
>Your smile stretches wider, and you let out an involuntary laugh, the first you've had in a long time.
"I think I'm going to be fine."

There you are, boys. A nice quick short for you. I've thrown it on Ponepaste as well just so it's there.
https://ponepaste.org/3534

Hope you had a giggle.
>>
>>36398766
>>36398772
>>36398778
>hope you had a giggle
It’s not funny anymore now. To me at least. Now it feels like you’re trying too hard to get (you)s. But I’m sure someone else will like it, so meh
>>
>>36398788
>Nebullus
Holy moly, is this me or do we have an oldfag writefag coming back? Also, why is your Luna such a bitch here?
>>
>>36398824
Because the joke is dead
>>
>>36398844
How does that explain anything?
>>
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>>36398788
>Hope you had a giggle.
Certainly did. Best thing on /mlp/ this year ^ : )
>>
>>36398788
That last part was cute, good end to the humor, thanks writefag
>>
>>36398788
>Nebulus
Damn, there's a name I didn't expect to see today. How are you? That was a fun little green, by the way- thanks for that!
>>
>>36398766
>>36398772
>>36398778
>>36398788
I keked. GJ,
>>
>>36398665
Bo, let him keep the name. At least this way other authors won't take credit for a good and funny story.

Well done >>36398647
>>
>>36398944
Sir, you should go back.
>>
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>>36398944
i mean i dont really need it when im not writefagging. i just forgot to take it off
>>
>>36398967
Kek
>>
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>>36398967
Luna's ass is not that big. As for the rest of your post Luna is the best pony princess by far, not to mention flat out best pony. I refuse to discuss or acknowledge anything else in this thread.
>post cute Luna
>>
>>36398967
Based
>>
>>36394649
Fucking based anon
>>
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chapter two is already drafted up, heading to work in a few but will dump when i get back. fair warning, there is a lot of celestia in this chapter but i don't plan to take things too far in that direction, this is still about luna 100%
>>
>>36398967
Anon please, I’m not supposed to get erect right now
You’re fucking based though
>>
>>36399109
Getting ready for your flattening?
>>
>>36399150
I’m at work
>>
>>36398880
I'm doing alright, Anon; hope you're doing well. Glad you liked it.
>>36398824
Hah, sorry about that, I meant for her to come off as exasperated since she'd been getting asked a whole load of daft questions. I didn't characterise her properly, I think.
>>36398799
Sorry about that, man. I started writing the second bit almost immediately after the first since I had a sudden idea as to how to continue it.

Good thread, though. Lot of cute Luna pics. Of all the princess horses specifically oriented to look after the night, she's definitely in the top 10.
>>
>>36399235
I still think you did a decent job. Hopefully there'll be more green goodness in the future.
>>
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Anyone have any music for the
>tfw you will never be with her
Blues? need something to make me sob.
>>
>>36399507
https://youtu.be/pUZeSYsU0Uk
If you like piano. This one always makes me sad.
>>
Post deleted, spam still up. I expected nothing more.
>>
>>36394543
Swear loyalty?
>>
>>36399604
Jannies love playing gods, throw shit at us and watch us squirm. Simple as this.
>>
>>36399858
Mods. Jannies can't ban. That's what the image test was for.
>>
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>>36399507
I like to listen to long somber instrumentals while running through some scenario with her in my head when i need to be the sad.
Godspeed you black emperor is great for it.
https://youtu.be/wy4IsC5eb7o
https://youtu.be/CRIJuGgFkl4
https://youtu.be/zWRUqvkx1DI
>>
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>>36400615
>when i need to be the sad.
Are you implying that there are times when you AREN'T sad?
How the f-- You bastard!
>>
>>36398788
Thank you
>>
>>36400662
It's mostly overshadowed by my love for the moon mare.
>>
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chapter 2 dump incoming. for those that don't wanna wait for the posts, its up on ponepaste as well (same with the first chapter)
>https://ponepaste.org/3536
as always, critiques/ideas/whatever is encouraged because i don't know what i'm doing most of the time
>>
>>36400759
> it's the middle of the night
> and you have a midnight hunger the size of patagotitan mayorum
> google it dumbfucks
> you wipe the grog from your eyes and start to yell for twilight but then you realize that she's not there anymore
> or rather, you're not there anymore
> twilight would stay up reading most nights and absolutely ruin her routine because of it, which she predictably shit a brick over every time
> that being said, it made for many an interesting midnight conversation over some milk and cookies that were definitely not beaten out of spike
> good times
> slipping out of bed and fastening your custom rarity-stitched flannel human robe over your shivering frame, you walk into your slippers and pace to the door, the rust on the hinges begging you for some wd-40
> sorry kids, not a carpenter
> there are a few guards down a ways to the left and a mostly empty hallway to your right, and it's there that you spot what you're looking for
> the kitchen
> to be more specific, it's one of many kitchens scattered around the castle
> must be that one of the princesses is a major snacker and probably can't be bothered to go to one that's any more than a few pony-lengths away
"Ah man, am I really starting to measure shit by ponies now? I need to get out of here."
> your hollow chuckle bounces off the walls and one of the guards to the left makes a face at you, to which you give a frank wave
> closing the door behind you a little harder than you mean to, you stuff your hands into your pockets and whistle something from a video game you used to play as one does when traipsing down an empty hallway like this on the way to get one's mean munch on
> a minute or two later and you're standing in front of the kitchen, hand on the door when a rattle from inside stays your entry
> some based individual must have had the same idea as you
>>
>>36400764
> enlivened by the kindred spirit of a fellow midnight snacker, you enter the kitchen with mirth on your face for all about two seconds
>
> a number of things catch your attention all at once
> for one, the pantry raider inside is none other than princess poker face herself, stuffing her face with what looks like some copyright-free generic oat loop cereal barely contained within the cavity of a black-and-blue magicked spoon
> her mane is tangled and sticking out in places and it's clear she had no intention of being seen
> wasn't she supposed to like... be doing moon duty or whatever the fuck?
> you'd later chalk it up to imagination but you could've sworn there was a tiny smile on her face while she was slurping up those delicious honey spinners (not trademarked)
> her moon-plastered flanks are cozied up on the counter and her hind legs are tucked up to her side, sort of like how a cat sits on the kitchen table after you've insisted a billion times that cats are not allowed where humans eat
> she hasn't noticed you yet, but you've got all of about ten seconds before things go from weird to weirder
> better break the ice
"What's cookin', good lookin'?"
> luna's spoon pauses mid-air and she snaps towards you with an unreadable stare, star tail aggressively morphing in an unseen wind beneath her
> you look at her
> she looks at you
> you smile at her
> and she stares back at you
> a bright flash overtakes the room and the smell of ozone scorches your nostrils; by the time you finish clearing the midnight blue smoke from your lungs, the princess is gone
> her bowl clatters to the floor, spoon flying off to the side somewhere, but before the bowl empties itself completely onto the marble below it, too, disappears in a flash
"Huh."
> you end up raiding the pantry anyways and taking some boxes of cereal back to your room
>
> the rest of the night passes uneventfully and despite your late-night munchies you wake the next morning decidedly rested
>>
>>36400768
> sitting up in bed, your fingers find that one awful itch along your spine and you shred it to pieces while fighting back a yawn
> the yawn won, though
> it dawns on you that you were supposed to be 'adjusting your schedule' to better suit the needs of miss midnight snackerino but you've got time, so it's not the biggest worry on your mind
> what IS, however, is what in the fuck you're going to do in the time you're not harassing the lunar princess or stealing food from the royal pantry
> you decide to think on it while you enjoy a hot shower, and while showering you indeed do think about it
> as you're brushing your teeth with horse toothpaste (surprisingly minty), you think about it
> and when you're changing into a fresh shirt and some jeans, you still think about it
> despite the astronomically large number of thoughts bouncing off of your smooth, fleshy brain, you come up with absolutely nothing
> this same nothing weighs on you for all of two steps before you're approached by a guard
> pegasus this time, with a teal mane and bright blue eyes
> "Anonymous, your presence is requested in the throne room; I will escort you to the Princess."
> to this you shrug and do as you're told, following the mare with empty brain
>
>
> "Anon? How nice of you to join me during Day Court!"
> celestia chimes in happily and you stare at the line of commonerponies stretched out the castle doors and into the courtyard
"...Didn't you ask me to come here?"
> she chuckles and gestures to a vacant seat beside her absolutely massive throne, which dwarfs you in size despite your stature
> you plop your statured rear in the seat beside celestia and have a gander at the fare before you, which is mostly just distraught looking ponies with more shallow problems, no doubt
> "You're probably wondering why I called you here," celestia leads, shaking hooves with a bearded stallion that departs from the throne room with a smile on his face - guess he got what he wanted
>>
>>36400772
"Something like that. Not like I was really doing anything, though."
> celestia ignores you and continues
> "Well, I'd like you to observe the normal court proceedings here so you have an idea of how they're supposed to be run. Luna has her own court too - court that she hasn't attended since she's returned. Ponies don't stop having problems when the sun goes down, unfortunately, and somepony needs to be here to address them: that's where you come in."
> you weren't following until she leaned in to whisper that last bit to you; her honeyed breath tickled your nose and you felt awfully aware of her, unlike moments before
"...Sorry, run that by me again?"
> celestia resumes her regal posture and dismisses another pony, who she somehow managed to sort out in the time it took for you to recover from the sudden invasion of privacy
> "I'd like you to help Luna run Night Court - once she's able, of course. I think getting her back into her old routine might help to bring out some of the life in her."
> you really don't think that's going to work, but you're not going to disagree with this diarch in front of her subjects so you sort of non-committally nod and wave at some foal in the back that was peeking its head out from between its mothers legs to gawk at you
> the little pony ducks back under cover and its mother glares at you, which you rebuff with a grin
>
> celestia calls for a brief intermission around noon so you and everyone else involved can get some lunch - there was about half a dozen courtstaff that periodically chimed in for celestia when certain questions were asked, or when she just didn't feel like answering (sometimes even when she did feel like answering), so the room cleared out nicely and what remained was you and the princess, who was just picking herself up from her throne with a big, feathery stretch
>>
>>36400775
> kind of weird to see such large wings up close, and you entertained the thought of celestia preening like a common city pigeon, but she must've caught you staring and gave you a faceful of feathers for it
"Shit! Don't do that, you birdmare!"
> you swat the wing away and she chuckles to herself
> "You know, if any of my guards were to hear you talking to me like that, they would no doubt have you tried for crimes against the crown."
> firmly resisting a sneeze, you cross your arms and fall into step beside her as she leaves the room, headed for the kitchen most likely
"And I'll tell them I 'caught you splashing around in the courtyard birdbath the other day, preening like a goose' before they lop my head off."
> for once, celestia's impenetrable, benevolent smile falters and is replaced by a meager blush, and it gives you pause
> "...You saw that?"
> your legs lock up and celestia is shot a confused stare
> "I. Er. What?"
> celestia's ears flatten against her head and she lowers it considerably, looking up at you with (you hate to admit it) the most adorable expression you'd ever seen
> "Anon, please don't tell anypony you saw me doing that - I'll do anything!"
> at this point you're completely floored, and with your jaw locked in place you can do nothing but nod, which isn't really a proper answer to her plea
> all of a sudden, celestia's guilty frown turns into a mischievous smile and she straightens up in an instant, whipping your chin with her tail as she strides past you
> "Gotcha!"
>
>
> sun horse just pulled one over on you
>
>
>>
>>36400777
> the rest of day court proceeds without a hitch and, much to your disdain, nothing interesting happens at all
> no joke requests or exceptionally idiotic questions asked of the princess
> seems like ponies take their solar god pretty seriously and the amount of bullshit that filters into the courtroom is next to none, which is a good thing for sure
> after the court proceedings finished up for the day you retired to the kitchen for some dinner and made your way to the dining hall, bustling with the nightly chatter of nobles and clatter of dishware
> there was an empty seat somewhere near the far side of the table and you squeezed in between two pompous looking nobleponies before chowing down
> "I say! Dear boy, can't you see this chair was occupied?"
> you squint
"By whom?"
> one of the nose-turned stallions, a purple unicorn with a greasy black mane, runs a hoof through it and clears his throat
> "By our very conversation, of course!"
> you ignore them and start shoveling food into your mouth, the sight of which causes the stallion to your left to faint and the other to harrumph and extricate himself from his seat, which was just fine with you
> aside from those two though most everyone else seemed to be absorbed in their own vain conversations
> greedy moves from the upper class, trying to play the political game and win the favor of important nobles to gain leverage and perhaps elevate their own standing in time
> it was a patient, methodical game some just didn't have the balls to play seriously
> a fake laugh here
> an insincere compliment there
> the kind of shit that made you sick, really
> tuning out the most of it was all you could do, but something odd caught your attention in the midst of the background gossip
> "...that's why the Princess doesn't show her face around the castle anymore..."
>>
>>36400782
> "...the kind of thing that would make ME loathe to appear in front of my sister, too - if I had one..."
> "...a thousand years? Why, isolation like that would drive me mad! I'd get a break from my wife, though, so it might not be ALL that bad."
> your brain now firmly attuned to this juicy tidbit about your new employers, you attempted to listen in a little more but as the night took over so did the dinner chatter die down as well
> whoever was divulging that incredibly interesting piece of information was quiet now, and all that could be heard was the dull hum of a dying ballroom meal
> shit, you may have to get the information from celestia herself
> if she feels like giving it up, that is
> it wasn't like she was keeping secrets from you or anything, since you hadn't asked, but the next time you were face-to-face it may warrant further discussion about exactly why luna was the way she was
> as you're leaving the dining hall and making your way back to your room, it comes to your attention that you'll probably be staying up tonight, lest you forget about your obligation to become the silent princess's consort
> it's a funny thought - so funny, in fact, that it keeps you occupied enough that you don't even notice the exchange happening further down the hall, which just so happened to lead to both of the princesses' bedchambers
> shit you're probably not supposed to be here
> taking stock of the scenery you flatten yourself against a wall around the corner and try your best to pretend you aren't eavesdropping on the two sisters
> "Luna, you haven't eaten anything in a week; I'm beginning to worry about you!"
> ""
> "Could you at least look at me? Sister, I want nothing more than for us to go back to the way things were. You know that!"
> ""
> further silence followed, and the pressure of despair was almost enough to pop your eardrums
>>
>>36400788
> "...Well, I will see to it that your breakfast be brought nonetheless. Please set your plates of uneaten food outside of your door and I'll have one of the maids pick it up for you."
> ""
> celestia's despondency was palpable and you had no sooner begun peering around the corner to get a visual on this depressing spectacle than celestia herself appeared right in your field of view
> you stand at attention and mock a stride as if you were walking down the hall moments before
> "Anon? Did you need something?"
"H-haha yeah something like that. I was trying to make my way out of the dining room and got a little lost."
> celestia's expression is ambiguous at best but she fronts a smile and takes the lead in the opposite direction of where you assumed luna's room was
> "Are you adjusting well here in the castle?"
> you shrug your shoulders, the hands in your pockets limiting your range of motion somewhat
"Not too bad. Food is good, at least, but the characters here are one-of-a-kind. The artificial personalities here take some getting used to."
> a chuckle at that, and as celestia turns the corner you're familiar with the scenery ahead - looks like you're getting close to your room
> "Yes, nobleponies are definitely a breed of their own and playing their game is something that takes ages to master. I wasn't always in charge of Equestria, you know - there was a time when I was just Celestia, and Princess Luna was just Luna."
> the wistfulness in her voice is telling, but you don't press her any further
"Speaking of Luna, you still haven't told me what's wrong with her. I mean, you two are night and day when it comes to personality - no pun intended."
> celestia is silent, seeming to choose her words even more carefully than usual
>>
>>36400789
> "Anonymous, I'm sure you have an idea as to how complicated the situation between my sister and I is; the reason you're here at all is to remedy that, as I said the other day. That being said, I don't think it's exactly pertinent to divulge to you the precise nature of my familiar affairs to you just yet, and though you may hear bits and pieces from other ponies, the reasons behind my sister's behavior is a story only I can tell."
> there wasn't anything you could really say to that
> it was true that there was some bigger picture to this situation you weren't quite seeing, but only time would tell if you were able to get the truth out of either one of them
"It's not a big deal, honestly. I'm not one to pry, so if you don't feel like you need to tell me what's going on I won't ask you about it."
> it's a certain kind of relief that plays on celestia's alabaster muzzle and she warms you with a genuine smile, straight from that big horsey heart
> "Thank you, Anon. You have no idea how much that means to me."
> you mumble out a 'y-you too' and jiggle the handle to your door, trying to get it open and escape the awkwardness of the warm and fuzzy alicorn outside your door
> rolling a 3 for escaping celestia, she pulls you back into a tight hug and nuzzles the top of your head
> her wings unfurl and wrap you up in additional embrace and you're suddenly feeling quite aghast
> "Twilight has informed me of how much you loathe physical contact, but I think you just haven't had the right kind of hug yet, Anon - trust me."
"...Please... can't... breathe..."
> you fruitlessly attempt to squirm out of the furry white hug but celestia holds you tighter for a few more seconds until you finally go limp, to which she responds by dropping you to the floor with a heavy thud
> "Goodnight, Anonymous!" she sings, trotting off with a smug skip in her step
> you can't get into your room fast enough
>>
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>>36400793
and that's it for tonight. i'm still figuring out how i want to characterize luna so i'm saving the big luna bits for later chapters (probably a good chunk next chapter.) going to do some research into isolation and how it affects the mind etc but itll probably be a while before she opens up to anon. she'll start speaking soon enough though, so that'll be fun. as always hope you guys enjoy
>>
>>36400799
ahh man im really liking this. Luna having a smile on her face as she devours off brand cheerios in the middle of the night, shows she at least takes solace in something and isnt totally dead inside. damn i cant wait to see what happens.
>>
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SHH, lil moonbut is alseep! Reply with "Sleep well lil moonbutt" to get sweet dreams tonight.
>>
>>36401282
I don't usually recall my dreams, but maybe tonight.
>Sleep well lil moonbutt
>>
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>>36401282
Sleep well, little moonbutt.
>>
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>>36401282
WAKE UP MOONBUTT
>>
I reported monkeyfucking spam 3 times on 3 IPs.
The jannie is a monkeyfucker.
>>
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>>36394065
Funny, she looks real to me.
>>36394061
Every night, friendo.
>>
>>36400799
Checked. Loving this.
>>
>>36401282
Sleep well lil moonbutt
>>
>>36400799
I'm enjoying this so far; keep it up!
>>
>>36401508
Boop the night
>>
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>>36401319
You earned yourself a trip to the moom.
>>
>>36402750
Moon*
>>
>>36402750
Oh yeah please punish me nighty I'm very naughty.
>>
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>>36402773
>>
>>36402773
Then prepare for your nightly penis mooning!
>>
>>36402833
>luna sends only anon's dick to the moon
>every night ponies have to see the dick in the moon
>>
>>36402869
>"Apparently Anon's dick is on the moon."
>"..."
>"Hm. I'm going to need a stronger telescope in order to see it."
>>
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>>36402361
>>
>>36402899
your hand looks like it was soaked in vinegar for 12 hours
>>
>>36402945
Maybe it's some obscure pre-booping ritual?
>>
>>36402869
>>36402876
>both of them don’t know what a “moonening” is
Lmao @ these cherrybois
>>
>>36402945
>>36402998
As if I'd boop her with a dirty hand.
>>
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>"Imagine it Anonymous, all the power of both the moon and sun at our disposal!"
>"This century's Total Eclipse will truly be a sight to behold!"
>>
I want to rape Luna into submission.
>>
>>36403079
2snacks is great.
>>
>>36403119
He's a real human bean, and a real hero.
>>
>>36403085
>implying you'd be the one doing the raping
>>
>>36403239
>implying I can't enjoy it the other way round
I don't really mind.
>>
>>36403318
Wait, so who's raping who? Doesn't even sound like rape anymore, just aggressive sex.
>>
appreciate all the positive feedback. i actually have chapter 3 finished up and ready to go but again, work is a bitch so it won't be out until i get back. if you're impatient you can just check ponepaste i guess. after today i'll take a bit of a break (i wrote chapter 3 in one sitting last night) so i don't wanna get burned out or anything, but you should see more next week or so. woo
>>
>>36403383
One-sided aggressive sex in this case.
>>
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Dreams of sweetest emotion touch my heart and smother my daily suppressed cries, while a vision of beauty, pure and dear inspires me with a glimpse of paradise.
>>
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>>36395678
listen dog, I'm not a fan of fascism either, but really? in equestria? it's fashtopia over there, and luna's the one who unironically wanted even more. Nightmare moon ring a bell? goddamn, watch the show sometime baby
>>
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>>36403397
Doing good work, anon. Thank you.
>>
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>>
>>36403824
>>
>>36403888
Why did I know that you would post this here?
Come on, you are so predictable.
>>
>>36403888
>>36403895
Kill yourself you mobileshitting gen-Z nigger.
>>
>>36403888
>those trips
Aight you convinced me, beautiful digits.
>>
>>36403903
It would only be predictable if you were one of those /sun/trolls to begin with
>>36403888
Blursed trips
>>
Why do twichads tolerate cute human versions of their purple pony, but moonlovers try to drive out anybody who wants to post humanized?
>>
Cute
>>
>>36403888
>>36403895
literally kys right now, you degenerate retard
>>
>>
>>
>>36403947
There is only one Luna and she is a pony. The thread is about Luna and not some human.
>>
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>>36403947
Because twichads are not chads at all. They are the scum of the Earth, who are also complete doormats.
>>
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>>
>>36404001
>>36404055
>>36404062
>the reason there aren't humans in Equestria is because they love Luna so much they would fight to put her in power
It is cute in a way
>>
>>36404058
they just don't have autistic sisterfag jannie on their side...
>>
>>36404055
I love this. Imagine a bunch of moonbros loyally defending Luna.
>>
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>>36404066
Yes.
>>
>>36404273
I love this, I love this so much, thanks for sharing.
>>
>>36404273
Next time I look at the moon, I'll feel inspired to keep bettering myself.

We are all gonna make it /moon/bros. You are sincerely good people, we gotta be strong.
>>
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>>36404280
>>36404304
I appreciate it. I make a bunch of these dumb lil memes. I wish you all the best.
>>
>>36404586
The feeling is mutual.
Hope your 2021 had a good start, anon.

t. Someone who never crossposts, just sincerely loves /moon/ and only /moon/.
>>
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>>36403947
> twichads tolerate cute human versions of their purple pony
Speak for yourself, bullshit-teller.
*twifag, hates EQG and the most of humanizations*
>>
>>36404687
Based twifag
>>
>>36404586
This is sincerely beautiful, I can feel the love you have for Luna
We will prevail against the toxicity of other generals trying to beat us down, there is just this sweetness to being part of /moon/

May the shine of every moon craddle your nights
>>
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>>36404670
>>36404718
You are good men
>>
>>36404687
New respect for twifags
>>
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>>36404924
The second one isn't, he's still trying to start shit, just a bit more subtly now.
>>
>>36404273
>>36404586
>>36404924
I am so late to the party, I appreciate your creations anon. If you have more stuff to share please don't be afraid to do so. Be proud you have made our night inspiring.

>>36404670
>>36404718
Your feelings are beautiful too.

>>36403888
Of course the post calling out the trolls is the one that gets deleted.

>>36392685
All I dream for is to overcome my horrendous back injury, so I can enjoy all the new moons you raise at every night, my Princess
>>
>>36405016
>All I dream for is to overcome my horrendous back injury
Story? That is, if you don't mind sharing?
>>
>>36405016
/moon/ is more than just a general. It is love.

>>36404992
Please, you are the one trying to bring negativity here. Respectfully go back to whatever thread you came from, and in the very small chance you are from /moon/ doubtful since you are insulting another person here remember we are in this together, Luna loves us all. You are a good man too in my eyes, we should stand together in the face of other boards or even generals whatever it may be trying to harm us.

Wish you a good night lad.
>>
>>36404992
Ah shit
>>36405016
Will do, the files are surprisingly big(since most the original pictures are big) and have to be individually cropped to go in the post so it may be sporadic.
Back injuries are absolutely shit I hope it heals as best as it can and that you can be at your best, friend.
>>
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>>36405023
Job market is bad and had to take work at construction. All my life being a wagie working at banks, so little strength on arms. Ended up hurting my back after falling down stairs carrying sacks. I missed a step, so company is not at fault at all.
>>36405054
/moon/ is indeed love, the peiple here are sweeter on average.
>>36405059
Thanks anon. I am also looking forward to your pictures.
>>
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chapter 3 dump incoming - this'll be all for a while
ponepaste link for the impatient
https://ponepaste.org/3538
>>
>>36405120
> 3am
> feels like your eyes have been banished to the sun
> your head hurts, your throat is dry and you haven't moved in at least an hour
> did you mention your eyes are on fire?
> you're currently slumped over your shitty short pony bed, tossing a tennis ball you found on a walk earlier against the wall, where it then ricochets off of the floor and back into your open hand
> welcome to the machine
> the room is filled with a groan and you peel yourself off of the sheets and walk over to the mirror
> you can barely see the top of your head standing at full height, which annoys you, but slouching down so you're in full view annoys you even more because it hurts your knees
"I need to do something before I keel over and die."
> you slam your fist into an open palm and, slipping on a pair of rarity-brand sneakers you slip out of your room in search of something to do
>
> and your wandering brings you back to the hallway where earlier you were privy to some family matters you probably shouldn't have been
> odd that celestia, with all her wisdom and mystery didn't mention your obvious eavesdropping, but you guess it just wasn't important enough to her
> there are guards, of course, lining the hallway leading up to the two sisters' chambers, and each of them are giving you stinkier and stinkier eyes the further you look down
> better not do whatever the fuck your feet brought you here to do
> instead you decide to take a stroll through the palace grounds, hopefully stumbling upon the princess of the night in the process
> you were never told where exactly you should meet with her and 'get to know her' like celestia said, so short of kicking in her fucking door this was probably your best bet
> that, or heading to the kitchen for some grub again
> probably a long shot
> you pass through the big castle doors, which are opened for you by a pair of gold-plated nimrods, and the beauty of the night unfurls itself in front of you
>>
>>36405123
> can't say you remember the moonlit sky looking as good back on earth as it did here, though that might be a result of the heavy light pollution (and also regular pollution) shitting up the air
> it feels like you could connect the dots, quite literally, and form some constellations, but you were never that into astronomy so any hope of that is dead to the world
> a cool, but comforting breeze slips into your clothes and you shiver a bit before quickening your pace to the gardens, hoping to find some covered bench and admire the stars in peace
> and there she is, in all her silent glory
> luna is sprawled out in the gardens, her tail half-submerged in a tiny pond as she gazes infinitely long into the starry sky
> she's idly etching something into the ground with a stick wrapped up in an icy glow and she hums a one-note song, which is kind of weird
> an ear flicks to the side as you step on a cliche branch trying your best to approach silently, but she doesn't stop what she's doing
> seems like she doesn't really care if you're there or not
> you get closer and dust off a space beside her before plopping down indian-style, resting your chin in your hands
"Hey."
> predictably, she says nothing
"Like what you've done with the place."
> nada
"The sky, I mean. That's what you do, right? Your sister is the sun and you're the moon and stars or whatever. Kind of cool, I think."
> zilch
"I was never really into astronomy when I was a kid, but I did kind of wonder what was out there from time to time. There's gotta be something bigger than us, right? Something we can't even comprehend just waiting out there for us to discover it."
>
>
>
> you rub the back of your head
"Yeah that was kind of gay, sorry. I dunno what to say when I'm the only one talking - I kind of just babble a bunch of nonsense."
> "Thinketh we a fool, Anonymous?"
>>
>>36405127
> the sudden blurb of ye olde rattles your brain and you realize she's staring right at you, those vivid cyan orbs tearing you apart
> "We are aware of thy purpose here in Canterlot, and what Celestia hast put thee up to; we are not a fool, as so many have thought before thee."
> luna slowly rises to her hooves and, never breaking eye contact with you, kicks off her regalia and drops to the ground, rolling around in the dirt
> you have absolutely no idea what's going on
"You're not really selling me on the 'we are not a fool' line there, Luna."
> she pauses her wriggling and locks eyes with you, making for a really weird image
> yknow, stone-faced longhorse with her legs up in the air and her coat covered in mud
> "It doesn't matter - thine image of us, thine efforts to 'warm up' to us, or Celestia's attempts to broker peace by showering us with favor after favor; none of it matters. A thousand years hath passed, and yet another thousand more will pass, and nothing will matter."
> she abruptly stands and dusts off her coat with a hoof, kicking her regalia into the pond with neither urgency nor annoyance
> "If thou wondereth why we do not speak, it is simply because we hath nothing to say - this will likely be the last time thou heareth our voice."
> unfurling her wings to full breadth, luna flaps once and takes to the sky, quickly disappearing into the shadows of the castle and leaving you absolutely fucking floored
"...What?"
>
>
>
> the rest of the night you neither hear nor see any signs of luna returning to the castle, and when you brought luna's slippers, crown and chestpiece (it's kind of like a bib really) to a rather unsurprised guard, it didn't seem like anyone else had any indication of her presence here either
>>
>>36405129
> made you wonder just how in the world you were supposed to mediate if there is only ever one party present
> after a few more rounds through the castle, you decided to head back to your room and think on it; luna said herself that you weren't going to have another conversation, so you figure you'd better ask celestia how to move forward with this whole thing
> you're once again smacked upside the head with confusion as you open the door to your suite and luna is snuggled into your bed, fast asleep
> all logical functions have ceased
> brain is mush
> uhhhhhhhhhhhhh
>
>
>
>rebooting...
"...Bro what the fuck is going on."
> you eloquently rouse the princess from her apparent cat nap and she slowly raises her head, blinking sleepily at you
> "Didst thou need something?"
> you kiss your palm at breakneck speed and gesture to the bed, the dresser, the door and pretty much everything else in the room
"Yeah, you see, this is MY room. What are you doing here?"
> hostility is not what you're going for here but it doesn't look like it matters one way or the other because Luna picks herself up off of your bed and, with a stretch, casually passes you and trots off
"Wait, didn't you say we weren't going to speak again?"
> the lunar princess quizically tilts her head and, without turning back to you, shakes her head
> "Didst we?"
> and with that, she's gone
> what a fucking psycho
>
> you pass out shortly after and awake somewhere between noon and 4 pm with a rat gnawing on the inside of your belly
> really need to stop sleeping on an empty stomach
> a shit, shower and shave are easily tackled and you're out the door with pep in your step unusual of someone who slept half of the fucking day
> after you handle the hunger business you make your way to day court and, without asking, stuff yourself into the empty seat beside celestia, earning a few surprised blinks from the peanut gallery
> guess it IS only your second time in the throne room
>>
>>36405120
I was waiting for this, thanks
>>
>>36405131
> "Good afternoon, Anon. Did you sleep well?"
> you cross your legs and lean back a little in your seat
"After I cleared Luna out from under my covers, sure."
> the ponies in the throne room let out a collective gasp and at least one stallion in the back fainted
> it might've been the same one from the other night, actually
"...Guess I said that a little louder than I meant to."
> celestia is genuinely blushing now and covers her muzzle with a hoof, prompting one of the court staff to call for a recess in her stead, which she thanked him for after collecting herself
> the throne room quickly emptied itself and celestia waited until every pony was out of earshot before clearing her throat
> "Well, Anonymous, would you care to explain why my sister was in your bed last night?"
> you scoff and don a look of indignation
"You WISH your sister was hot enough for me, mare - trust me, my tastes are more refined than you'll ever know."
> she extends a wing over your face and you shoot back far enough in your chair to capsize the thing and spill out onto the floor, which celestia enjoys immensely judging by her cruel laughter
> parting ways with the floor, you dust yourself off and kick the chair for good measure
"A-anyways, it's not like that - I talked to her for a bit in the gardens, she rolled around in the dirt, and next thing I know she's passed out on my bed like a housecat."
> despite the initial confusion, celestia doesn't look too surprised to hear about her sister's unusual sleeping habits
> "This may come as a surprise to you, but a guest's bed is not the strangest place she's been known to sleep; the roof of the castle, in recent memory, is one of her favorite spots it seems."
"You have any idea why? Doesn't really strike me as normal princess pony behavior."
> a shake of her head is your answer, though she does seem to be ruminating on something
> "Did you say you spoke with her?"
> now that you think about it, that's probably the bigger news here
>>
>>36405136
"Yeah, she talks like an old history textbook, though. Y'know, 'ye olde' bullshit."
> you wave a hand around in a circle to emphasize just how bullshit and ye olde her sister was but celestia is as lively as you've ever seen her, positively brimming with happiness
> "Anonymous, you may not realize but that may be the first time Luna has spoken since she's returned - and to a stranger, no less! You're making great progress with her already, I see - I may just have to give you a raise!"
> you deadpan
"You aren't paying me."
> celestia stifles a chuckle with her hoof and trots towards the kitchen, likely in search of some sweets (she's a major sweet demon, you've come to find out)
> "Are you coming, Anon? I'll be sure to save some cake for you - if you hurry, that is."
> your disgust for baked goods is immense and visible on your face but you hurry to the kitchen nonetheless, not one to miss a meal
>
>
>
> day court wraps up for the day without incident, despite the faux pas on your part earlier
> you're mindlessly roaming the halls, like usual, when you happen to catch the sun bleeding through the clouds on the horizon through an open window
> much like the nights, the sunset was clearly a cut above the shit you knew back home
> colors seemed to POP from the sky and were beamed right into your occipital lobe, and it was so magical you felt yourself being carried outside to oh no you were just jumping out the window right onto the castle grounds below
"OH SHIIIII-"
> the castle grounds were, unfortunately, several stories below and with nothing to break your fall it looks like you might be on your way to the next life sooner than you expected
> well, this is it
> you mutter a precious few prayers and cross your hands over your chest, ready to die at the ripe age of 24 with absolutely nothing to show for your life
> there were some good times, and some bad times (mostly bad), but you can't say you were given the shittiest hand
>
>
>
>>
>>36405141
> the sweet embrace of death fails to claim another human soul, and you carefully squint an eye open to admire the artisan stonework mere centimeters from your face
> you're floating
> of course you're floating
> i mean, it's not like one of these many magical horses would just let a human fall on thei-
> "FUCK!"
> your head makes contact with the pavement and the lights dim just a bit, though they don't go out completely
> to your left, the fading posterior of princess luna disappears behind some perfectly trimmed hedges and you quickly follow after her
"Hey."
> luna turns her head to look at you, not immediately, but says nothing and continues walking
"You just gonna not say nothing after saving my skin like that?"
> "'Not say anything', Anonymous."
"Yewhat?"
> she stops, turning her blue-furred muzzle your way and repeats herself
> "Thou didst say, 'gonna not say nothing', didst thou not?"
> hearing what was a pretty funny mockery of your broken english spoken in a completely nonplussed manner was pretty jarring, but you play along
"Yeah, what about it? You the grammar police or something?"
> luna seems to consider this for a moment, and after a succinct "No", she leaves you behind
> another mysterious and nonsensical interaction with luna? check
> you're really killing this job, anonymous
> definitely getting that raise
> rather than let her get away from you again, you decide to follow her and see just where this mysterious mare is about to fuck off to
> after you round the corner, though, you walk right into her big blueberry ass and nearly fall back on yours
"Fucking hell, mare!"
> upon further analysis, though, it seems she's just as enraptured by the setting sun as you were before your unsuccessful suicide attempt earlier
> more specifically, she's watching her sister, who appears to be lowering the sun from a balcony high above the two of you
>>
>>36405146
> wrapped up in a ball of golden light, celestia is levitating a few feet off of the ground, hooves outstretched to the blazing ball of fire making its descent in the sky and horn aglow in honeyed aura
> in the final throes of its fading rays, the sun smiles once more upon the land of magical horses and disappears beyond the horizon
> well, it's not REALLY gone, flat earthers
> quickly replacing it, however, is its pearly white cousin, which makes its graceful ascent upon a blanket of twinkling stars
> you were fairly certain that you heard in one of twilight's 'pony history' rants that each sister was responsible for raising their respective celestial body, but it seems like celestia is in charge of both
> luna's unblinking stare brings out the awkward in you and, by the time celestia is finished raising the moon, you're itching to leave
> the younger princess doesn't seem to be in much of a hurry, though, and after her elder sister is back inside the castle she carries right on in the direction of the gardens, where you found her the other night
> nothing makes SENSE with this mare, and you HAVE to figure out why
> not like you're going to get it out of her though
> instead, you find another point of interest when, after settling down in her spot from the other night, luna's stomach growls a growl so fierce it might've put your own prehistoric hunger to shame
> you hazard a question you know the answer to
"Luna, have you eaten today?"
> she shakes her head
"Why not?"
> she shakes her head again
"Okay, that isn't really an answer."
> you shuffle around on the ground until you're facing her, and she lowers her head so she's eye level with you, rather interested in the features of your face
> hey, you're a good looking guy - no surprises there
"When was the last time you had, like, some actual food?"
> "Centuries."
> this seems like a joke to you so you laugh out of courtesy, but it's soon apparent that it was very much not a joke
>>
>>36405151
"Haha, good one. No, but seriously, when?"
> luna considers this question for more than a few moments, and by the time you've felt it's been long enough that you can repeat it she suddenly cuts you off
> "One-thousand years and two-hundred sixty-four days."
> this is an awfully specific number for her to be pulling out of her ass, but you still find it pretty hard to believe
> i mean, what, she'd have to be over a thousand years old for that to be true
> "Sorry, that was a joke."
>
>
>
"What?"
> "Sorry, that was a joke", she repeats
> you clear the wax from your ears with your pinkie finger and clear your throat
"You were... joking?"
> luna blinks and nods her head, another growl erupting from the depths of her gut
> "The truth is that we do not remember how much time hath passed since we last partook - we do not even remember what food tasteth like."
> at this moment, you remember the incident with the cereal the other day
"Wait, I'm pretty sure I saw you stuffing some sweet sugar rings into your muzzle the other night."
> for the first time since the two of you met, luna expresses something other than nothing
> she smiles
> it's an awkward, crooked, lopsided smile, but a smile nonetheless
> as quickly as it shows, though, it fades fast
> "...That is correct. Though we knoweth not why, the oat spheres were..."
> seems like she's searching for the right word
> you try to help her out
"Fucking amazing?"
> "...not dirt."
> ...
"Not exactly sure what that has to do with anything, but hey, that's a start. Why don't we go get some more, then? I could sure use a bowl right now."
> luna takes the lead and, without waiting, heads back to the castle, presumably in search of some more mareios, but when you round the corner to catch up with her she's nowhere to be found
> it's a little disconcerting, but at this point, nothing she does could surprise you
>>
>>36405157
> you decide to head to the kitchen anyways because, as it were, you were pretty hungry and all this talk of cereal has gotten your cravings up
> as soon as you make it to the nearest kitchen, however, it becomes apparent that stumbling upon a sleeping blue mare is going to become a running gag in your life
> looks like she didn't quite make it to the pantry before her apparent narcolepsy took over; a bowl is resting against a limp forehoof draped across the counter, and a glass bottle of milk is tucked under her chin, which rests dangerously close to the edge of the counter
> luna herself is slumped over the countertop on the far wall of the kitchen, fast asleep, and you can't help but feel the urge to drape a blanket over her snoozing frame
>
> you rush out of the kitchen and, passing a few bewildered guards, sprint back to your room and grab a few blankets before hoofing it (heh) to the kitchen, where luna is still out like a light
> after wrapping the sleepy princess up like a baby you relieve the glass bottle of milk from duty under her muzzle and return it to the fridge before quietly extracting a box of cereal from the pantry
> its hinges have been mercifully greased to be near-inaudible and you thank whatever thoughtful handymare fixed the shit up, unlike your poor suite's door
> two bowls of cereal are poured and, after sliding one her way and posting up on the other side of the counter with the other in hand, you eat your fill and similarly pass out on the countertop shortly afterwards
and there you have it. gonna take a little break and compose my thoughts but ive already got an idea for the next chapter or two stewing in my head. ill rest for tonight and maybe tomorrow and be back at it maybe this weekend if i feel like it. thanks for reading and feel free to share whatever youre thinking so far
>>
>>36405164
I'm enjoying it, particularly now as we start seeing some interaction with Luna and her... rather eccentric behavior. Celestia is an interesting one - she seems dead determined to keep Anon in the dark and figure out things for himself. I suppose, if you can't get the answers from one, you basically have to talk to the other if you want to sate your curiosity.

Also, I couldn't help but kek at your previous update. Anon using literally the cheesiest and oldest pickup line ever to break the ice.
>>
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>>36405094
I'll do my best not to disappoint. Been a construction worker for years and have seen plenty of new guys get injured fast(especially since lockdown and us being "essential"), I'm so sorry for that friend. It happens to the best of us(you're gonna make it!)

>>36405120
>>36405123
>>36405127
>>36405129
>>36405131
>>36405136
>>36405141
>>36405146
>>36405151
>>36405157
>>36405164
Only green I'm currently following. Absolutely loving it.
>>
>>36405242
yeah, im trying to keep how she acts in line with both how i think a PONY (creatures even more social normally than humans) would react to a thousand years in isolation and studies conducted on humans who have been isolated for a long time. side effects include stuff like short term memory loss, inability to recognize places and faces, irregular circadian rhythm, etc as well as a sort of emotional distance that comes with your neurons fucking dying basically. pretty interesting stuff to read up on if you feel up to it. celestia is also far from one-dimensional here too and like i said earlier im playing around with the concept of celestia not intending for luna to have been banished at all, but it being the elements' doing and out of her control completely. we'll get more into that as things progress though and luna starts 'feeling' again
>>
>>36405259
>-only green I’m following. I love it!
>You sit back in your gaming chair, after having typed that out, and sit back, awaiting the next post.
>Tmp tmp tmp~
“Huh?”
>Something is tapping your window.
>You look towards it, and see Luna. PRINCESS LUNA?!
>She’s wearing green panties for some reason, and suggestively wiggles her rump at you, before hovering off.
“....”


Do you break your declaration to MBM and follow another green?
>>
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>>36405284
That got a chuckle. I appreciate you and your creative efforts
>>
>>36405270
>Celestia not meaning to banish Luna, Elements doing their own thing.

Mah nigga. That's always been my headcanon. Keep up the fine work, friend.
>>
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>>36405094
Fuck man, that sucks. I was in the same boat a month ago - searching for anyone who would hire me.
Hopefully you heal up soon friend.
>>
>>36405331
Based
But also unanswered
>>
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>>36405377
Ah, you got me. I do not think any among us could resist
>>
>>36405413
>MBM when he just lost his support
>>
>>36405424
Eh. Can't win em all
>>
>>36405424
A fellow moonman would understand. Shoot your load at the moon and it may land among the stars.
>>
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>>36405444
>trips
checked
>those half lidded eyes
ah yes, hello boner. nice of you to show up again
>>
>>36405443
>>36405444
>After having sincerely retracted your statement, you bolt from your chair to follow that plump green.
>Once outside, you see Luna perched on a cloud, watching you from above.
“LUNA! LUNA! I LOVE YOU! LUNA!”
>She smiles softly, before bursting into green fire.
“LU—naafuuuuck?!?”
>it’s chrysalis.
>”SIKE! THAT’S THE WRONF GREEN!”
>”OOOOOH!”
>Normally here one would fall back into a crowd of cheering admirers after dropping super hot fire, but chrysalis for some reason falls back into a pile of logs with crudely drawn on faces.
“......shit.”
>>
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>>36405479
They knew what they were doing with that cover.
>>36405483
The crowd of logs with faces being set up before her stunt that'd she'd have to pick up and move around awkwardly regardless of if you chased her or not is kino.
>>
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>>36405585
It’s okay. I know this is your princess
>>
>>36405666
> no holes
>>
>>36405683
They’re elsewhere
>>
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>>36405666
You will not trick me, Satan! The trips reveal your true intentions.
>>
>>36405702
YES ITS A BUG!
GIVE HER A HUG!
KISS HER SWEET MUG AND THEN FILL HER WITH LOVE
YOU LOVE THE MOON
BUT THAT WILL END SOON
ACCEPT YOUR NEW PRINCESS OR YOU’LL MEET YOUR DOOM
>>
>>36405731
I only hug evil ponies, Satan.
>>
>>36405731
Satan's eloquence once again comes to tempt the poor souls on moon loving men
>>
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>>36405731
satan, leave us humble moonfolk alone
>>
>>36405748
This is a good picture
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AV00cT5qWEQ
>>
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>>36405770
This is nice.
>>
>>36398502
Who cares.
We all love Moon.
>>
>>36406071
>why is princess lun so popular
BECAUSE SHE IS THE ABSOLUTE BEST CHARACTER IN THE SHOW

Sorry, it had to be said
>>
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Kind of an autism post but sometimes when I'm feeling down I'll listen to some songs and imagine singing to/with Luna, you guys have anything like that?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPT_RjpVuv8
>>
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>>36398788
Many thanks Anon.
>>
>>36406115
Yes.
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>>36399507
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_TbF5m5KpU
>>
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>>36406115
Absolutely. I don't always imagine myself singing them, but I do have loads of songs I listen to that make me think of her.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJZXyI5uHZs
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>>36399507
>>36404586
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9wqR1XhQ3o
>>
>>36406169
>black hands
Unironically I love you anon, never seen that fanart before and I sincerely love it
t. Brown skin anon no kidding
>>
>>36406172
Based brown moonbro
>>
>>36406172
Good to know Anon, honestly i wouldn't have noticed a detail like that but it's nice to know it brightened up someones night.
>>
>>36406172
Luna is so special she is beloved by every demographic, she far surpasses all the the other princesses.

I am glad to meet you, moonbro.
>>
>>36406115
https://youtube.com/watch?v=VurhzANQ_B0
I always picture the female vocals as her joining in with me while I'm singing this to her. This song always seemed so twisted and demented as to be right up her alley.
>>
>>36406172
The hands are white, it's just the lighting playing tricks on you.
>>
>>36406188
Check again, the hands aren't black in the slightest. Poor lighting makes it appear so.
>>
>>36406309
>>36406313
I am looking at the pic over and over again and comparing with other art and it does seem like black hands. Anon please, don't bring your need to ruin art for someone else here. If you are triggered just let it go, it is a single unique piece of fanart out of thousands. Luna loves all of us.
>>
>>36406330
Nobody is trying to ruin it for you dude, they're just saying the lighting may make it seem darker. Who gives a shit
>>
>>36406330

Not them but there's nothing wrong with pointing out stuff with the art like how dark the whites of luna's eyes are and if that's how dark white is imagine how dark skin would be as well. Please don't relegate everything to being "triggered" or some other shit. You're trying to cause strife and divide others.
>>
>>
>>36406330
No, it most certainly are white hands. Blacks should be chilling in Zebrica. There must be plenty lonely zeebs out there and they need a real nigga.
>>
>>36406339
There qas no need to correct it unless it bothered you personally, there is no weong way to fantasize
>>36406342
>>36406358
>>you are trying to cause divide
>he says while trying to cause divide by looking to diminish the fanart for someone else
I want peace. There was unironically no necessity on calling them out for enjoying the art their own way. Did it really bother you that much?

Come on guys, let this be the final comment on this stuff. Again, there is no wrong way to fantasize and we are much more better than this. Come on.
>>
>Unironically bringing race into a thread about a moon horse.
Step away from the keyboards, fellas. Focus your thoughts on things that truly matter, like how Luna would smell in a morning after waking up next to you following a peaceful slumber in each other's arms.
>>
>>36406379
She smells like heaven
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>>36406379
>like how Luna would smell in a morning after waking up next to you following a peaceful slumber in each other's arms.

So...
The royal shampoo then?
Maybe lavender and body-scent?
Hmm.
>>
>>36406379
>>36406431
>each other's arms
Actually horses don't have arms, they have 4 legs
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>>36406441
Her forehooves are basically arms
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>>36406454
Leg-arms then?
Larms?
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>>36406454
Actually those aren't "basically" arms. You either have arms or you don't.

Hope this motivates you to arm yourself with a bigger vocabulary.
Nyehehehehe
>>
>>36406172
you are disgusting and cringy
>>
Dear dream princess, save me from the dreams about being assfucked.
>>
>>36406471
Functionally, she can wrap them around your neck and shoulders the same as arms. Of course, forehooves would hook over your shoulders perfectly, and she wouldn't have that issue of "What do with the lower arm" you get in bed when you fall asleep facing each other.
Really, forelegs are superior to arms when snuggling her.
>>
>>36401282
Insomnia is a bitch and so is your sister.
For the love of every star in the heavens let me get some sleep
>>
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>>36406639
Only ever had that nightmare once. Left me traumatized for a few hours after I woke up.
>>
>>36406785
I had these dreams 3 times for last 4 days, it is very annoying. It's not like I think about anal sex for hours, why do these keep coming? Luna surely wouldn't approve.
>>
I've been doing keen attempts on lucid dreaming and dream recall for over a month. Haven't managed to turn lucid yet, but I'm hoping I can meet Luna soon enough :)
>>
>>36405164
Really good update. luna's behavior certainly is peaking my curiosity, cant wait to find out more. the only thing sofar thats bothered me is that, Anon is kind of an asshole, But im pretty sure its being done on purpose. also,

>You rub the back of your head
>"yeah that was kind of gay, sorry."

i kek'd
>>
>>36406843
yeah i mean he IS supposed to be anon after all, which is a self insert for your average alaskan ice-fishing forum poster
>>
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>>36406789
I had a repeating nightmare as a kid, it was a really weird and dumb one, but for some reason really scary. Always waking up with my heart pounding, scared as fuck.
Was going crazy, thankfully managed to learn some sort of semi-lucid dreaming before I snapped.
>>
Has anyone tried making Luna audios with the 15.ai audio thing? It's so close to being good and I just want to hear her voice talk to me forever.
>>
>>36407528
A thread or two ago someone posted a real nice recording.
>>
>>36407528
>>36407549
If you are going to use that program here is some advice
>>
>>36407660
ARPA is useful for moans and other noises. I have a whole folder of my experimentation regarding different stuff for Celestia.
>>
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>>36407528
I posted one in the unofficial new year /moon/ thread you might have missed.
It's Luna comforting the listener after a nightmare.
https://u.smutty.horse/lywbnrrxrtg.mp3

There's some other good Luna audios in the shared AI audio folder, I'd recommend listening to the ones in wholesome/serious folder
http://derpy.me/23EUs
>>
>>36407783
You made that one? It's incredibly well done. Stellar.
>bump
>>
>>
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>>36408850
What a beautiful image
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>>36406392
West virginia
>>
Very small but very pretty
>>
I want to fuck the moon
I want to fuck the moon
I want to fuck the moon.
>>
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>>36409300
You get it
>>
>>36397067
Just look at that chiseled chin and smug expression. What a chad. Her body count probably numbers higher than all of yours combined. This is the ideal form of my waifu.
>>
>>36409294
It will be the next puzzle
>>
>Guys, I'm still here fishing for (You)s!

Anyways, I'm just about wrapped up with Embracing the Night's next update - I've basically been burying myself in writing to escape the absolute fuckery and misery of reality. But, still took too long and I won't have any space to post it. If we're still alive once I tidy it up, I'll just post a link to my ponepaste. Otherwise, there will be fresh green early next /moon/day.

Actually, I might be able to post it yet in AiE unless another writefag gets done and posts something. Usually they get the update after /moon/, but I might make an exception.
>>
>>36409895
you keep it in /moon/ ya here
>>
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>>36410086
those forelegs are fucking weird
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>>36410095
this better?
>>
so anons, what would you name your firstborn foal with her?
Aurora for a filly, Magnus for a son
>>
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>>36410187
>Implying Noctis wouldn’t sabotage your wedding
>implying you wouldn’t have to sword fight him as he tries to kidnap Luna to make his autistic “novel” reality.
>implying you won’t go on a journey to save her as a mute protagonist and meet other /moon/ anons along the way to help you fight Noctis and his discord lieutenants

A better question is who will be in your party, and will you be able to save her before the sodomy from the /moon/ discord server
>>
>>36410103
>anthro shoulders
anon, i...
in all seriousness i love luna on her back with her legs in the air though i feel a real need to BREED
>>
>>36410187
What if I tried to name him or her after either of our parents or family members?
>>
>>36410309
Mmmm, Albert, yes.
>>
>>36410237
>Noctis
God damn, there's a fucking name and person I wish I could erase from memory.
>>
>>36410187
Centaurs or satyr? Maybe onocentaur more of your speed? Ipotane?
>>
>>36410337
Well he’s still around. On the “moon” discord, where they kiss his ass so he keeps boosting their server filled with furries, suicidal transsexuals who talk about “eating Cummies” whenever they can around the underaged who they show clop to. I’m glad they’re not linked here anymore
>>
>>36410361
I took a break from /moon/ when he was a thing here - man that shit was intolerable. Not surprised he found somewhere else to fit in - or made somewhere else to fit in.

Never joined the discord, never planned to do so. Only been a part of two servers - one for Assetto Corsa mods, and one small one for me and my buddies I've been vidya gaming with for 10+ years. Both are fucking autistic as hell - it's just a discord thing, I guess.
>>
>>36410337
>>36410361
>>36410434
Why the fuck are you trying to make this all about yourself namefag, leave your retarded drama somewhere else. /moon/ is not to discuss your personal life or boast about moral superiority.
>>
>>36410434
I was brought in because I was interested in creating content and i thought it’d be cool to talk to other anons. Back then moon was jam packed with fags like>>36410456 and it wasn’t fun. No one wanted green or anything, just an image dump, and I really liked writing. Then the finale came and a lot of things changed.
>>
>>36410456
Looks like someone is mad.
>/moon/ is not to discuss your personal life or boast about moral superiority.
It's about posting the same 20 images every thread, right?
>>
>>36410478
Close. It's about posting the same 20 images every thread and hoping that a writer comes by to provide some hopefully-good green.
Then it's back to posting the same 20 images.
>>
>>36410456
I'm dumb as a stump, that's why I was namefagging. Forgot to delete the name field and I never pay attention because I just see the "A."
>>
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Tell Noctis his girlfriend is waiting on her child support
>>
>>36410510
its really not that big a deal honestly
>>
>>36410510
One turbo gay doesn’t speak for everyone. Again I didn’t even notice until he pointed it out
>>
>>36409895
Thanks for the heads up and feel free to ignore >36410002 since he's probably the same guy who yells we should only post in /moon/ and that other threads are out to get us.
I've just checked AiE and they're as dead and greenless as usual so you're in the clear if you want to post the update early.
>>
>>36410510
Don't worry about it, man. Happens to the best of us.
>>
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>>36410510
No worries man, it really isn't any big deal. That turbo autist is just mad nobody's screeching about muh humanized anymore, so he's digging up ancient, fossilized drama and throwing everything he can at the wall to try to ruin the thread and drive off what writefriends we have.
>>
>>36410187
Selena or Nyx for a filly. No idea what to call the little guy, though.
>>
>>36410866
>drive off what writefriends we have
I'm not going anywhere. I'll also have a new LE update ready in time for the next thread. Hope you guys have a great weekend.
>>
>>36410866
i mean this is the first ive really lurked /moon/ and its pretty autistic but no more than any other general on this board so whatever, not like ive got anywhere better to dump my moonhorse fantasy fiction yknow
>>
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>>36411081
Yeah, we're a bit autistic, I won't deny that. But this thread was by far one of the biggest shitfits /moon/ has seen in probably a year or two. Usually we're much more calm and comfy - I'm hoping next /moon/day will return to proper form.
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>>36410352
pony filly, human son. extreme dimorphism is the patrician's human/pony reproduction, anon
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>haha look flash! I got the final post in /moon/day again!
>>
>>36411387
This is the only correct answer.
>>
See you all next thread. Shoot for the /moon/
>>
>>36411387
I'd always go for pony.
>>
>>36410187
Astra for a girl, Titus for a son
>>
>>36411555
>Titus
Was a guy at my school. Came to my class in second grade in primary school, was always fighting with someone, I threw a chair at him after he threw a chair at me. I had to go see a therapist for anger issues. Turns out I don't have anger issues, be he does.
He changed class. Police had to come 3 times, because of him. He threatened a girl in his class and stabbed scissors in the wall next to her head. Dropped out of school and started rapping, even had a label. Had a real gun in one of his videos and got arrested for possession of illegal weapons, posted the letter from the police on facebook and bragged about it.
Good times.



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