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File deleted.
What is a 'Satyr Abomination' thread about?
A satyr is what happens when a human and a pony decide to get freaky and end up having a child. The top half is mostly human, the bottom is from pony mom (or pony dad). This thread is dedicated to the art and written works about these lovable creatures.
>What about other species?
The show had quite a few different intelligent species by season 8, 'everycreature' and all. Pick your poison, but /mlp/ is mainly into ponies.
>What is the world/characters/personalities & attributes?
The most common setting is one or multiple Anons in Equestria. Most of the established characters are in the list below, the personalities mostly vary from green to green. Just ask the thread about common headcanons.

Satyrs by Parent: https://pastebin.com/d7T2GaDk
Story by Parent: http://pastebin.com/qFf46ep5
Author List: http://pastebin.com/RFgtrECq

Searchable Archive:
http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/search/?tags=satyr

Discord:
https://discord.gg/4yAUDzK

Dropbox
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/m74cw1zph214irq/AACgNqIgES4fQORdx3rooQoVa?dl=0

Kid Icarus ROM Hack: An alpha hack for the NES Kid Icarus game.
https://filebin.ca/3NORheK9hIFr/hope.ips

Old thread: >>35479297
>>
And we're live
>>
Gib story ideas pls.
>>
What makes tomboys so great?
>>
>>35652180
They cure the gay.
>>
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>>35652180
Pic related and also
Tomboys are for:
Getting in fights with her
Playing sports with her
Watching kung-fu movies with her and trying to copy the moves
Teasing her and laughing when she gets mad and pouts
Letting her pin you so you can feel her body pressed against yours
Flipping her back over so that you can stare into each other's eyes
Protecting her from bullies even though you know she can handle herself
Cheering her on and always supporting her, win or lose
Throwing her a victory barbeque where you make all her favorite foods
Massaging their legs, shoulders, and back
Holding them close and telling her you love her
Reassuring her that she is the most beautiful girl in the world when she gets jealous of the more feminine girls
Accepting all of her girlish sensibilities, no matter how much she hates you finding out about them
Patting her head
Getting caught in the rain during a cross country run and having to huddle together with her under an abandoned bus stop waiting for it to pass
Holding her hand in public
Making her try on cute dresses when you're out on a date even though you know she'll never buy one
Buying her sexy black lace lingerie, only for her to wear spats over them
Tracing your finger over the tanlines she got during the summer and feeling how warm her skin is
Having her jump into your arms and kiss you after spending time apart over vacation
Introducing her to your parents
Marriage
Carrying her over the threshold of your new home to start a life together while she punches you in the shoulder and pouts that she can walk just fine herself
Gently laying her down on the bed
Whispering into her ear how much she means to you while caressing her toned body
Spending an entire night making passionate love to each other
Raising a new generation of tomboys with
Loving unconditionally as you grow old together
These are the things that tomboys are for
>>
>>35652473
Also mating press, it's important not to forget that one.
>>
This thread should've stayed on /trash/
>>
>>35652794
No u
>>
>file deleted
2hot4mlp
>>
>>35652827
Some people can't appreciate the art of body paint.
>>
>>35652794
hello based department?
>>
>10
>>
Remember boys; tomboys are just for vanilla and happy sex
>>
>>35653911
And marriage.
>>
>>35653727
Gumdrop just really likes riding the edge, okay?
>>
>>35653911
Does playful wrestling for control to see who gets to be on top count as vanilla? What about cheating by using tickling to get a dirty advantage?
>>
>>35651503
I picture her as being reasonably close with Cardio, having grown up wrestling with him despite him being a fair bit older and having their parents put a stop to it after a few years when he started getting accidental boners. Myopia is a little more distant while still being amicable and friendly. Aloof would probably be the best way to describe her. The kind of person that wouldn't agree to play hoofball with her brother/twin unless she had it in writing from her mother that she would get blamed for it if they accidentally broke something.
>>
>>35653931
What if they get pregnant before marriage
?
>>
>>35654415
Shotgun wedding complete with an anchor baby that ensures he'll never leave if he knows what's good for him. Plus a lecture from her mother about safe sex and responsibility.
>>
>>35654332
No, but they would love it
>>
>>35652794
Speaking of /trash/, what happened to the hybreed threads?
>>
>>35650559

“Now then, instead of complaining about how bored you are why don’t you start thinking of where you want to eat tonight? How about that place where you had those shish kabobs last time? You enjoyed those quite a lot as I recall.”
>Satsuma shook her head a little, still rocking in her chair.
>”Nah, too noisy.”
“Okay then, the seafood place we went to last month? Nice and relaxing atmosphere there, hmm?”
>Satsuma sighed.
>”Do we really have to go somewhere? I always feel out of place at those fancy restaurants you take us to and you always make me wear one of my lame dresses.”
“Your dresses aren’t ‘lame’ they’re real Prada from Earth and you look beautiful in them.”
>”I feel like a total poser in them, it’s bad enough you made me wear a blouse and skirt just to come sit here in your office today. I look like your secretary.”
>Yuzu tutted, pulling over a fresh stack of papers to begin leafing through.
“It wouldn’t do to have a senior partner be seen with a child running around the office that looks like she just climbed out of the garbage dump.”
>Satsuma frowned.
>”Wow, thanks.”
“Well you could stand to dress a little more feminine, that’s all I’m saying.”
>”Gay.”
>>
>>35654701

“Alright then be that way. So no nice restaurants tonight, but I’m not letting you fill up on McRonalds again. You eat far too much junk food already. You want to order a takeaway from home later?”
>Satsuma shrugged.
>”Can’t you like, cook something yourself? We have a huge kitchen but we hardly ever use it.”
>Yuzu hesitated.
>Truth be told she didn’t even know what ingredients they had in the house.
>Home cooked meals weren’t exactly one of her strong suits as a parent.
”I, uh… I suppose I could give it a shot. Something simple shouldn’t be too difficult.”
>”It doesn’t have to be a five-star meal, mom. I just want to… you know…”
>She looked away, a slight hint of an embarrassed blush upon her cheeks as if she realised just how out of character her words felt as she said them.
>”It could be nice or whatever to eat with just the two of us, I guess.”
>Yuzu nodded in agreement, happy to see this new side to her daughter.
>It was definite progress that was for sure.
“Okay, I’ll give it a go, that sounds fun. Don’t judge too harshly if everything comes out burnt, though, because I’m entirely out of practice at cooking. Your auntie was always the more domestically minded of us.”

>>35654641
Gone, reduced to atoms. I think we just sort of ran out stuff to talk about to the extent that we couldn't keep the threads alive without constant bumps.
>>
>>35654729
>I think we just sort of ran out stuff to talk about to the extent that we couldn't keep the threads alive without constant bumps.
I guess. Shame. We got some good art every once in a while.
>>
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>>35654491
It better be a nice shotgun wedding as well.
>>
>>35654891
Oh yeah, a proper church and a nice reception afterwards. Lets just hope the bride's water doesn't break while walking down the aisle.

>>35654491
>a lecture from her mother about safe sex and responsibility.

"So repeat it back to me so I know you've been listening."
>"I'm not saying it, mom."
"I'm not leaving until you do. Now, what must me remember if we have no condoms?"
>"Ugh, fine... if I'm horny in heat, in my bum he will skeet."
"Good, and?"
>"Seriously?"
"Just say it."
>"If I don't like the bum then in my mouth he must cum."
"Good!"
>>
>>35654891
A many of many moos
>>
Sir, I caught your satyr playing on page 10 again.
>>
>>35656256
Shit, tell her i will get some cigs and back
>>
>>35654729
Worn out, passed her prime, bad at cooking single mother that won't do anal. Not exactly a prize catch.
>>
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>>35654959
I'm sure both sides of the family will be quite ecstatic as well.
>>
>>35657314
>tfw no shortstack wrassler gf to headpat
>>
>>35657417
I'm imaging them glaring at one another from the benches on either side of the aisle as granny lifts her coat slightly to reveal her switchblade.

"It's so nice to finally meet the grandmother of the man that took advantage of my daughter."
>"Likewise, it's good to meet the family of the hussy that seduced my grandson and destroyed his hopes of getting into a good college."
>>
>>35658344
It's nice to see presumable Granny Apple and Thunderhooves getting along so well.
>>
>>35656669
It's how you word it.

>Worn out, passed her prime
Experienced and with realistic expectations. No teen romance drama.
>bad at cooking
Enjoys learning new skills and improving.
>single mother
Caring.
>won't do anal
Sucks a mean dick and MAY do anal IF you can prove you really want it by cooking her a nice meal, asking VERY nicely and she's in an especially good mood.

She'd probably be ideal for a househusband that will do the housework and mostly just stay out of her way unless she wants sex or somebody to drive her daughter places.

---

"I don't know if I should mention Satsuma on my profile page, Murmur."
>"Why not? People like honesty on these things. Better to let potential matches know what they're getting upfront rather than have it come as a surprise to them later."
"Seeing 'single mother' is a huge red flag for most guys, trust me. It's right up there with when the woman describes herself as 'quirky' or mentions that she has lots of cats and calls her babies."
>"You're overthinking this. You could be a widow for all they know. There's no need to mention you got knocked up when you were drunk and just can't remember who the father is."
"Didn't you just tell me to be honest with them?"
>"Well yeah, to a point."
"I'm not looking for hookups, I want only genuine replies from guys wanting a serious relationship."
>"Right... is that why you included the pictures of you wearing lingerie in the photos section?"
"Well it's like you said, it's better to let potential matches know what they're getting upfront."
>>
>>35657792
Headpats and butt slaps.
>>
>>35658344
>"The baby better be cute."
>>
>>35659922
It's a baby moo, you better believe it'll be cute.
>>
bump
>>
>>35659220

>"Uh-huh, sure."
"What, you don't seem convinced. Is there something wrong with the photos?"
>"No I'm sure they're fine. It's just..."
"Just what?"
>"Well if you're trying to hook a guy with them maybe you could try arching your back a bit more and thrusting your butt out a tad. Maybe emphasize your chest a little more as well."
"I told you I'm not looking for hookups."
>"I'm just saying these pictures could mean the difference between getting a second date or not."
>>
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>>
Sweet tomboy abs bump
>>
>>35661364
Gross looking
>>
bump
>>
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>>35661973
Tomboy Ab Sweat brand energy drinks, coming to a store near you.
>>
>>35661977
No u
>>
>>35663087
They make a cute couple.
>>
>>35663422
"Harvested fresh from the gym."
"Straight from Tum to Tongue."
"The only way to get fresher would be to lick it off yourself."

What would a potential bottle design look like? I'm thinking something like pic related, only with 500ml molded plastic bottles in the shape of a female torso complete with rippling abs.
>>
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>>35663958
Just give to me now!
>>
>>35663958
Set up a factory where hundreds of tomboys run in shifts on treadmills while milking machines suck up every drop of sweat and send it to the adjacent bottling factory.
>>
>>35656256
And again! Look, I've warned your kid before to keep off my page. Next time I shoot on sight. Discipline your satyr!
>>
>>35665432

"Grumpy groundsman Scrooge McAnon says you have no discipline, sweetie."
>"I do, daddy."
"What's the first lesson of discipline I taught you?"
>"When under fire, return fire."
"That's my girl!"
>>
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>>35665595
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaC_7NLYrxM
>>
bump
>>
>>35664673
Boss Anon walks in and is greeted by dozens of playful punches in the shoulder every morning. He'll never admit how painful it gets by the end of the week.

"Now remember ladies, it's not a race, it's a marathon. We're a team here, so more seeing who can run the fastest mile and tiring yourselves out in the first few hours of your shift."
>"You got it, boss."
>>
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>>35666393
He tried to keep his birthday a secret, but once his employees found out the date now every year without fail they dogpile and wrestle him to the ground as a group in his office. Every damn year he's put in a headlock or has his face clamped between a pair of muscly thighs as the girls give him his birthday greeting. Poor Anon just wants to sell drinks.

Pic related but with satyrs.
>>
>>35664654
How many would you like, sir?
>>
>>35665610
Ari must be pretty serious about this to clip her horns. Those things bleed far enough down.
>>
Bump
>>
>>35666909
She knows that communism must be stamped out at every turn.
>>
>>35666615
Yes.
>>
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>>35668125
Her homestead isn't much, but it's hers.
>>
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>>35668512
Angry (slightly embarrassed) bleating and a barrage of hip-fired 20mm heavy machine gun rounds are all that awaits commie scum trespassing on her family's property.

>"It's okay, comrade. We don't believe in private property, therefore the bullets can't harm- Hgrk!"
>>
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>>35668125
>>35668512
>>35668566
Based.
>>
Unironically though, I can imagine the DGA family having a very frontier-like anti-government mentality. I'm not quite sure what you'd call it. Like the very strong belief that a person's home is their castle and that they should have the right to defend it with any means necessary. Sort of how there was the resistance in America to the "civilizing" of the west to the federal government coming in an imposing their laws and regulations on people that never asked for or wanted them in the first place.

I don't think I'm explaining it very well.
>>
>>35668619
Sounds about right. They live in a rather rural part of Equestria, so it's not like there's really police around to defend them most of the time.
>>
>>35668619
Well now I'm picturing Anon as a slightly crazy Vietnam vet.

"I fought and bled to stop the spread of an evil totalitarian regime that wanted to impose its laws on others, and now The Man wants to come in here and tell me I can't fuck monsters and raise my daughter in peace? I built this house with my own two hands and the sweat of my brow alone, and I'll be damned if I let anybody else tell me what I can and can't do."
>"Okay sir, but can you please just stop-"
"What did I just say? Lenora, fetch my 1911."
>"There's really no need for-"
"Get the hell off my property."

(It ain't me) intensifies.

Next they'll be telling him he's not allowed to mog the local stags and fuck their does after showing them what a bunch of effeminate sissies their men are.
>>
>>35668728
>mog the local stags and fuck their does
Fair's fair. If you want to live in a patriarchal society where the females are compelled to breed with the strongest male alone, you can't then complain when an alien monkey drops on you from the treetops, hogties you then fucks your mothers, sisters and female acquaintances right in front of you leaving you utterly helpless and humiliated.

You also can't be mad if he afterwards slaps you on the ass and says, "better luck next time, champ," before disappearing into the undergrowth. Rules of nature.
>>
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>>35668794
Deer society is like Islam in its treatment of women.

>"You could have at least resisted a little, Thickette."
"Why?"
>"B-Because he's a human."
"So? You and me are part human, so it's not like cross-breeding with them is against herd rules."
>"Well yeah, but..."
"Plus he did conclusively proved he as the most capable male around at the time, and it's not like I'm the only one who mated with him. Your mother-"
>"Don't remind me!"
"Well sorry, but that's just how it works. If you prove you're the strongest guy around that means you get your pick of the does come breeding season."
>"Okay, but what if he's our dad? I mean you don't exactly see many humans around these parts."
"I don't think so, we don't look anything like him. Besides, rules are rules, we're not allowed to refuse a mating proposition if the guy's proven he's the strongest."

Magical realm fantasy over.
>>
>>35668859
>>"Okay, but what if he's our dad?
Well a man just has a right to his daughters.
>>
>>35668859
>"Okay, but what if he's our dad?
>Besides, rules are rules, we're not allowed to refuse a mating proposition if the guy's proven he's the strongest."
>>
>>35668859
>"I mean you don't exactly see many humans around these parts."
"I wouldn't mind seeing more of him around my parts."
>"What?"
"N-Nothing."

---

>"We're not allowed to refuse a mating proposition if the guy's proven he's the strongest."
"Uh... hey, it's just you and me out here at the minute, right?"
>"Yeah, nobody else comes this close to the forest's edge but us."
"So, um, technically that means I'm the strongest male around right now?"
>"I guess technically, but that's not exactly a huge achievement."
"Cool... so if I told you I wanted to breed with you?"
>"I see where you're going with this, you little pervert, and yes, technically I couldn't refuse."
"So do you mind if I..."
>"Whatever, it's not like I'd feel it anyway if seeing what you look like naked down by the river's anything to go by."
"Hey, the water was just cold that day!"
>"Uh-huh, sure. Honestly you probably didn't even have to ask, I wouldn't have noticed if you'd just stuck it in when I was sleeping."

Being Driftwood is suffering, and you can bet Thickette is going to tell all the other does about this when they return to the herd."
>>
>>35668894
Take it to /incest/ if you want to go that way.
>>
>>35669064
Driftwood is in violation of Herd Code 3B/1 Subsection 4

"No male that has not yet completed the stag trials may request breeding rights, except under circumstances that have resulted in them being rendered the last remaining male of the group and thus their request may be deemed necessary for the continuing survival of the herd."

He won't get away with this.


This makes me wonder about what other funny customs and practices may develop within satyr society if given the absence of humans.
>>
>>35669139
Oh hey, I remember you and how you'd ask pretty much this exact same question way back months ago. I was wondering if maybe you'd given up on us or died or something. Remember how you'd always shift the goalposts whenever anybody gave you any kind of conclusive answer?

And yes, if it suits the story and makes it more fun to read then I'll ignore anything.

>>35654701
Your dresses aren’t ‘lame’ they’re real Prada from Earth
Making tomboys blush by having them dress up girly is what makes life worth living.
>>
>>35669154
Tomboy taming is a based and blessed fetish.
>>
>>35669166
If you can make a tomboy more feminine, can you make a trap less of a disappointment to their father? Steroids and testosterone treatment perhaps with a large helping of anti-sissy hypno videos?
>>
>>35669121
>funny customs and practices may develop within satyr society
Probably lots of slang for a start. Never refer to a satyr as a "halfie" because that's they're word and they'll get pissy if a non satyr uses it.
>>
bump
>>
>>35669121
An all satyr village would probably be clothing optional if the environment allowed for it.
>>
>>35669166
Who's best tomboy tamer?
>>
>>35670299
A satyr is what happens when a human and a pony end up together and have a baby.
This entire thing started with the idea of Anon you ending up in Equestria and having a child with your potential pony waifu.
If you truly believe that an all satyr village where ponies aren't allowed, perhaps not even the satyrs' own parents, sounds like a good idea here, then you must have forgotten what board you are on right now.
>>
>>35671001
Back again I see.
>>
>>35671031
Back again from what? And I dare you to say I'm wrong in any of that.

By the way, what exactly was OP thinking when he made that OP pic? Just looked in the archives, and dang, that's clearly NSFW. Did he forget he's on a blue board?
>>
>>35670855
Utah, of course.
>>
>>35654641
Who cares about that trash? Only ponyhating faggots went there.
>>
>>35669085
Here's fine. Daughters belong on their daddy's dick.
>>
>>35668566
Doesn't she know how expensive all that ammo is? She's going to have to work her fluffy butt off knitting sweaters to pay for all that.
>>
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>>35672873
Thankfully, she has a lot of cashmere to knit with.
>>
>>35673062
Doesn't look like that much if she's getting cashmere from someone so small.
>>
>>35673571
Don't worry, Thalia isn't the main source of cashmere. Pecan offers more floof than that tiny thing.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqTVHTgRW5g

>Ariana knits happily in the corner.
>Anon snoozes in his favorite comfy chair.
>Mera tries to read as Kimmy and Lenora fight for control of the sofa.
>Firginia munches lazily on a bag of fertilizer sticks.
>Living life in the compf lane.
>>
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>>35674022
Comfy.
>>
>>35674022
What's Cotton doing?
>>
>>35674184
She's acting as Anon's nice warm living blanket.
>>
>>35674524
Max comf
>>
>>35674524
What a fluffy bun.
>>
bump
>>
>>35671049
>By the way, what exactly was OP thinking when he made that OP pic?
I was thinking on swaty tomboy tiddies
>>
>>35676405
Truly patrician taste.
>>
I want satyr girls wearing sexy tights, but satyr girls have no reason to wear tights.

It's not fair.
>>
>>35676680
But they still can.
>>
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no page 10
>>
>>35668619
But what are their favorite guns?
>>
>>35678178
DGA himself might prefer either revolvers that let you react fast, or simply something with good stopping power for dropping game.
For Theseus, as far as actual firearms go, precision is still key, and he can pop a bear's head from 300 yards.
>>
upsies
>>
>>35678903
Gotelets rise
>>
up
>>
>>35679186
Are they even tall enough to?
>>
>>35678481
>>35678178
Nothing says get off my property quite like Lenora's good old fashioned double-barreled shotgun.
>>
>>35680295
Anarcho-capitalist cat.
>>
>>35680443

>"Miss, please put down the gun."
"Get off our land, glownigger!"
>"You have to pay your taxes, miss. It's royal decree that-"
"Taxation is theft, and around here we shoot thieves."
>"B-But you need to pay for the roads."
"Do you see any roads around here, alphabet boy?"
>>
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>>35680137
>>
>>35681203
Something that small has to make a big jump for that.
>>
>>
>>35654729
What's Yuzu's legal specialty?
>>
>>35683462
Seems to have been criminal defense, but must have later become prosecution if she eventually became DA.
>>
>>35683462
It varies depending on what exactly I want to write about, but I was thinking that she worked for a time as a public defender but found it very thankless and kind of dead-end and so decided to move into the more lucrative side of things. One thing to note is that I imagine Ponyville as growing into a larger town than we see in the show.

>Focused more on her studies and improved her grades after deciding what it was she actually wanted to do with her life.
>Went to college to earn her bachelor's degree and work on her public speaking and critical thinking abilities.
>Passed her LSAT to get into Canterlot School of Law.
>Worked for a time in as a clerk for Leech Lamprey & Associates (LL&A) to gain experience.
>Graduated Law school.
>Took up associate position at LL&A with the company contributing to paying off her law school loan.
>Didn't see many prospects for promotion in such a large company and didn't like working in the capitol away from home.
>Decided to go into solo practice and return to Ponyville after her loan was repaid, often working as a public defender.
>Satsuma is born.
>After several years she grows frustrated with her work and decides to specialize more in compliance and tax law for small businesses, seeing it as a growing opportunity as Ponyville rapidly changes from how we see it in the show into a much larger town.
>Sets herself up in a small office and expands her practice over many years until it's an established name in the local area.
>She hires on several partners and associates as her business grows alongside the town and she takes on ever more important and high paying clients.

That's about it. Nothing there's set in stone and I may chop and change things around, but that's basically the backstory I work with when I make greens about her.
>>
>>35684066
Noted.

>Isn't it odd working out all these intricacies for a niche character
>All this thought going into these characters aren't healthy in the slightest.
I think you're overestimating the amount of effort I put into this. To come up with that backstory took maybe five minutes at most.
>>
>>35683612
Satsuma gets a summer job at her mom's office when?

>>35683208
Now this one's new, right?
>>
>>35685063
>Now this one's new, right?
old as balls and the name is wrong
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>>35685063
>Satsuma gets a summer job at her mom's office when?
Doing what exactly?
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>>35687847
Mostly making tea, coffee and taking lunch orders from the various employees.

>"You know most of the food places around here have staff that deliver to offices, right?"
"Of course, we have loyalty discounts at most of them."
>"But you're still going to pay me to go out and collect from them instead?"
"It's easy money, isn't it?"
>"I guess, but it seems kinda pointless when you can just phone up an order and have them bring it here for you already."
"Look, I'm trying to make this work, but we just don't really have much else for you to do."
>"Well... what am I supposed to do if one of your guys wants to send me all the way across town to collect a sandwich when he can just buy one from the vending machine in the lobby?"
"You say 'yes sir' and go get what they wanted after they give you the money for it."
>"Seriously?"
"Think of it as exercise. You like exercise, don't you? Besides, most of them will probably give you a Bit or two for yourself if you're lucky."
>"Working for tips? This is kind of lame."
"Well that's employment for you, get used to it."
>>
>>35688095

>"Is there really nothing else I can do?"
"Hmm... I have some shredded documents that you could take to the trash."
>"Wow, that's much more exciting."
"I'm sorry, but you don't know our filling system, you can't answer phone calls from clients, you're not permitted to handle confidential documents and even helping the janitor legally requires you receive COSHH training. I'm really trying hard here to think of things for you to do."
>"Why do I have to work here at all? It's not right that I should have to spend all summer inside when all my friends are out having fun."
"Because it'll look good on your resume to any future employers, and with your grades you need all the help you can get."
>"Gay."
"Cheer up. People here like you and having you around is good for office morale."
>"Well if you want me to raise morale why don't I just start giving out handjobs in the bathroom to people on break?"
"Mmm, well if you think that'll help."
>"Gross, mom."
"You're the one that suggested it."
>>
boop
>>
>>35688097
>>35688095
They could get her go around town handing out business cards, provided that's not classed as solicitation.
>>
>>35689399
She "accidentally" spills a little water on the floor of a local small business then waits for somebody to slip and fall before casually slipping the owners one of the cards.

>"I hear these guys are good with liability cases."
>>
>>35689680
Clever filly...
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>>35690803
Satyrs are naturally clever ones.
>>
>>35691559
Ponies are easily tricked and very naive. You can't blame satyrs for taking advantage.
>>
bump
>>
>>35692181
Satsuma is a street-smart qt.

"So here's how it works. You put twenty Bits in this box and I put in ten, okay?"
>"Right, and then?"
"So there's thirty Bits in the box, correct?"
>"Yeah."
"So then I'll sell you the contents of the box for twenty Bits."
>"Wait, so you'll sell me thirty Bits for twenty Bits?"
"Yep! I started with ten Bits but make a profit of ten, and you pay twenty to gain thirty, so you also make a profit of ten."
>"So we both make money?"
"Uh-huh, so what do you say, deal?"
>"Heck yeah it's a deal!"

https://youtu.be/_jI6iAa-cC0?t=104

Why do batyrs have such big ears? So they can hear the sound of a Bit being dropped from half a mile away.
>>
>>35693191
It's not like she needs the money, she's probably the equivalent of a trust fund kiddie that could live off her mother's wealth so long as she gets even a part time job on the weekend to show willingness to actually work. If satyrs wore shoes, she'd be the kid at the skate park wearing Gucci trainers and Cartier sunglasses.
>>
>>35693191
>So they can hear the sound of a Bit being dropped from half a mile away.
Oy vey, ponim!
>>
>>35693191
What do batyrs and actual bats have in common? They're both used to hiding out in attics.
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>>35688097

"If you're really that bored why don't you go and see if you can work out what's wrong with the photocopier in the printer room?"
>"You kidding? I have no idea how that thing works."
"Neither does anybody else so feel free to have a crack at it."
>"Aight then, if you say so."
"Oh and Sumi."
>"Yeah?"
"No 'percussive maintenance' this time."
>"You're still mad about the TV at home?"
"Never you mind about that. Now run along, I have a meeting with a client regarding a malpractice lawsuit."
>"Lemme guess, is it doctor T again?"
"That's confidential."
>"I know it's her, I saw her smoking outside earlier. FYI, she's totally guilty."
"Good to know you're such a firm believer in due process."
>>
>>35693769
Remember the 6 quintillion.
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>>35696466
>>
>>35694057
Tonsils is a good girl who din'du nuffin. If those patients would just heed medical advice, we wouldn't have a problem.
>>
>>35694057
How's Tonsils intending to pay this time?
>>
>>35697324
All because she refused to kiss a 2nd degree boo-boo better on the grounds of it being unhygienic and instead decided on a course on anti-inflammatories and mild antibiotics. Damn poners and their backwards medical practices.

>>35697647

"Oh dear, I seem to have dropped my pen. Be a sweetheart and pick it up for me, would you?"
>"No, c'mon, I literally have the money this time."
"You do? As in actual cash this time and not an I.O.U scribbled on a napkin?"
>"Well I mean I don't have it yet exactly, I just need Anon to chase up a few patients and remind them their bill's due."
"So what you meant to say was that you don't actually have the money at all."
>"No, I do."
"It doesn't sound like it to me."
>"Well at least I will by next week. Look, I'll throw in an free checkup at the clinic, deal?"
"Hmm... I can't help noticing my pen's still on the floor."
>"Are you kidding me? This is sexual harassment and you know it!"
"Well then you're free to take your business elsewhere."
>"Funny, but you know you're the only ones that'll even touch my cases."
"Yes, and you know my pen's still lying on the floor under my desk."
>"Ugh, damn it, fine! You better hope your kid doesn't walk in."
"The door's locked and I sent her to go fix a photocopier that hasn't worked in three years, I think it'll be fine."
>>
>>35697836
She should just get used to it. Maybe bring her husband in to drill Yuzu while she watches like a good little doc.
>>
>>35697836
Does Tonsils really think she can afford Yuzu's 400 Bits per hour rate? Unless she has a bunch of savings or else those patients owe her an arm and a leg and can be convinced to pay up, she's probably going to have to resort to selling prescriptions meds on the black market again. Honestly, Yuzu's doing her a favor by waiving the fees and only asking for a little under the table oral action instead.

>>35698335
I though she wasn't married and that she and Anon were just old childhood friends that now work together. Or do you mean a different husband?
>>
>>35698532
I always assumed she and that childhood friend got serious.
>>
>>35696466
Cute. Is this new?
>>
>>35698532
Unfortunately for Tonsils, Yuzu knows that nobody eats horse pussy quite like a girl with a biology degree, especially if she's desperate. Yuzu doesn't NEED money, she NEEDS a good old fashioned oral exam.

>>35699150
Nah, pretty old.
>>
up
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>>35700570
tfw no qt dragon harem
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>>35697836
Full lesbian lewd when?
>>
bump
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>>35701726
Professional muff diving isn't full lesbian?
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>>35703189
I mean a full green of it.
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>>35703517
Imagine her sucking that giant, winking horse clit.
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>>35704099
Among their own kind, eating out a satyr girl is known as "pink pearl diving," or, "chasing the pink jelly bean."

>"Did you hear about Tonsils?"
"Yeah, they say her attorney made her get down on her hands and knees and chase the jelly bean for forty minutes."
>>
>>35705094
Just girls being girls.
>>
bump
>>
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shit has been slow lately
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>>35706920
Blessed pic
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>>35706942
Buffamoo with a baby belly.
>>
baby bump
>>
>>35707828
Which satyr is best milf/dilf?
>>
>>35708050
Gumdrop. She was a sopping wet mess during her pregnancy. Far more so than normal, somehow.
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>>35708050
darcy
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>>35708050
>Which satyr is best milf
Good luck getting anything more than a cold glare if you try flirting with her, because she takes her wedding vows very seriously.
>>
>>35688095
>>35688097
>>35697836
What her mother doesn't realize is that Satsuma is of the generation that can just look up a wikiHow article about how to fix a photocopier in five seconds. Satyr zoomers, man.
>>
>>35708463
Latina milf Darcy is pretty nice
>>
>>35709812
si, tell me about it.
>>
>>35709812
How does she compare to Delores?
>>
>>35711624
She certainly doesn't have as much of a badonkadonk
>>
>>35710121
She's gotten really good at throwing the chancla. Maybe not as well as her mom yet, but it's getting there.
>>
bump
>>
>>35712547
An experienced senorita can dual wield them. Do not underestimate.
>>
Weird question, but how would you rank various satyrs on the Traditional D&D alignment ranking?
>>
>>35713744
Kaos is probably the ultimate CN without being an actual murderhobo.
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>>35713744
Hope's got to be lawful good. I don't know why exactly but I can't see her otherwise.

Radiance I think of as neutral good, as though he literally is the establishment he still sees the flaws in the system and wants to change things for the better without things devolving into absolute chaos.

Dawn I think would be Lawful neutral.

Pogo I could see as being at any point on the good spectrum.

Garret I think would be neutral good.

Snapshot I could imagine being true neutral.

Mistake and by extension most changeling satyrs I could see as chaotic neutral.

Yuzu I see as a lawful neutral. She doesn't really care about overmuch about morality, only what benefits her family and friends, though she respects the status quo and the bounds of the law.

I don't really imagine many satyrs being evil.

>>35713801
Agreed.
>>
>>35713744
The only evil one I could see being possible is Salai in the LE.
>>
>>35714498
Murmur may be lawful evil, let's be honest.
>>
>>35715204
well...
>>
Off of page 10, little missy.
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>>35715204
You're not entirely wrong there.
>>
>>35713744
I have hard time seeing any of the apples not being LN, LG, or NG.
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bump
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>>35717875
Just a cowboy and one of his moos.
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>>35718742
sinful!
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>>35719156
Need lots of moos to have lots of calves.
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>>35719656
satyr goes with satyrs!
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>>35719656
But who will have the cutest ones?
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>>35721203
"ME!", said all 4 of his moos.
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>>35719656
How does his mom feel about all of this? Surely his monogamous mom and even his Aunt would raise an eyebrow. That's not even counting Darcy who'd probably throw a literal book at him instead of a chancla.
>>
>>35721392
She's probably pretty iffy about it. But when she sees that for what he broke in the traditional family unit, he made up for in spades in that family being big. He'll keep having kids until either he can't afford anymore, or his wives can't make anymore.
And really, AJ can't complain about having that many grandsmols to dote on.
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off page you little shit
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>>35724570
I don't remember this one. Is it new art for Nettle?
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>>35724679
no idea how old it is, i just found it on my folder
>>
>>35724679
It's been around for a bit. The most bullied bat has her face under other girls too much to have her portrait done these days.



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