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I've been friends with this trans girl long before transition. We had a lot of fun times.
I always thought she was cute. After she transitioned, she became even cuter and I'm sorry to say I fell in love. I tried to make some moves but she's always kept me at arms length since the transition.
She's sleeping with different men and women and I just have to sit tight on the sidelines.
I don't know what to do, but it's extremely painful.
>>
>Incel thread
You're glowing
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>>21582548
its hard to be done but you have to move forward my fren
forget this damned whore
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>>21582548
Welp, there are a few things you can try to do to get her to like you. But you might have to ultimately accept that she just doesnt feel the same way. Doesn’t mean you can’t keep supporting her as a friend.

Also, to an extent I might understand why she wouldn’t want to date you. I cant see myself falling in love with any of the friends I met before my transition. But that’s just me, she probably has her own reasons.
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>>21582582
>Doesn’t mean you can’t keep supporting her as a friend.
femalebrained but fuck this
friendzone sucks
if you cant fuck your whorish bitchy fren who fucks almost anything that moves then she is not your fren

t. malebrained
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>>21582582
I told her that I'd always be friends with her. But it's painful to for things to stay like this. She doesn't like me the same way. The friendship has been poisoned hasn't it?
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>>21582600
holy shit shut the fuck up
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>>21582548
She's probably a massive autist, have you made it extremely clear how you feel? She might be holding back for the sake of the friendship
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>>21582600
I guess that makes sense. I just don’t know why you *need* to fuck. I assume they were already good friends. Idk, I don’t get it, help me understand this
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>>21582616
seethe whore
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>>21582619
Yes I have
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>>21582614
Catching feelings for a friend blows universally, even straight male friends will dangle it like a carrot before their gay bros because they like the feeling of validation being seen as hot gives them. There's no good cope, but I would say spend time with other friends for a few months and leave her to it.
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>>21582614
>the friendship has been poisoned hasn’t it?
Absolutely not. If you two were already good friends, it shouldn’t really matter. One of my best friends confessed to me, but it wasn’t mutual. We still hang out all the time.
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>>21582631
says the literal incel
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>>21582629
well, if you are a male predator coomer, your main goal is to achieve sex and/or stable relationships
if you can't get this, then you are literally wasting your time
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>>21582668
I started out just wanting a friendship
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>>21582668
damn anon, guess i’m not malebrained enough to understand baka
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>>21582548
Have you told her you'd be fine with her girltinkler? And perhaps find it sexy even.
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>>21582676
god fucking damnit didn’t mean to say baka i’m going to fucking off myself
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>>21582675
but you have crush on her, havent you?
this shit will fuck you up and you will be depressed
love is a disaster worse than agp
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>>21582692
So now what? End everything? Or take a break?

There hasn't been a gap larger than 2 weeks between our conversations. Usually we talk every day. Should I put in a month long gap?
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>>21582548
If you've told her how you feel and she doesn't reciprocate you just have to move on. She doesn't exist only to have sex with you and it might hurt but if it's not gonna happen it's not gonna happen.
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>>21582728
Do a two month break and, more importantly, hang out with other friends. This'll give you perspective that it's impossible to get if you brood on shit by yourself.
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>>21582728
>She's sleeping with different men and women
if she is really like this, you'll suffer a lot
better to move on
or larp as a chad, seduce and dump her and move on
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>>21582767
op is literally a beta male who hangs out with gay boys. he isnt a chad, he needs to transition with her for fuck sake
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>>21582808
That's beside the point. Transitioning won't make her my gf.
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>>21582840
Whatever your constellation of interests is, anon, I guarantee that there are five million trans girls who share them with you. Find another girl to be your trans waifu and be happy.
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>>21582889
literally this
but op wont listen to it because he has crush
must of us would not listen in such situation
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>>21583112
How would I find a trans girl that knows me that well, that I have a history with and that things in common with me?
You know how rare trans people are in the first place.
Long friendships aren't just for tossing into the trash. Years of investment are destroyed
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>>21583261
>that knows me that well, that I have a history with and that things in common with me?
it looks like her brain learned that you are just a friend.
there is still a possibility that she would fuck you but she is afraid of something and avoids expressing her degenerate self to you
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>>21583404
Avoids expressing her degenerate self but gives everything to other people.
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>>21583431
like you don't talk with your family about dragon dildos under your bed
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>>21583443
So in reality I'm supposed to be flattered about this. Then why do I feel bad?
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>>21582548
So what specific steps have you actually taken to get with her?
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>>21583462
I've asked her out
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>>21583578
What did she say?
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>>21583611
No
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>>21583578
>>21583633
Well I guess that's that
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>>21583633
did she give a reason or anything? not that you should try to push her into it or anything, I'm just curious
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>>21582548
>it's extremely painful
you're a big guy
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>>21582548
>but she's always kept me at arms length since the transition.
I will never date someone who knew me pre trans
I have no confidence that someone who knew me as a man will ever know me as anything ae a man
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>>21584407
>she doesn't want to marry a childhood friend
trender
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>>21584479
>wanting to marry someone who has memories of every single minute you spent as a male
You're the trender
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>>21584497
marrying someone who knew you your whole life is more pure and has more benefits than marrying someone you've just barely met
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>>21584407
>I have no confidence that someone who knew me as a man will ever know me as anything ae a man
You lived as a man and see yourself differently. If someone really knows you and loves you they’ll see you as a woman even if they knew you from before.
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>>21584497
>Not wanting to marry someone who knew you as a man but loves you so much that he doesn't care at all
ngmi
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>>21584630
OP still isn't appreciated
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>>21582548
It sucks but if she can't view you in any romantic way, you have to move on for the both of you. It will take time and if you need to distance yourself from her to get your head straight then so be it. She has every right to sleep with whoever she wants just like you have the right to back off and focus on yourself.
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>>21587329
What if she reaches out? How do I try and stay away?
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>>21589623
If she reaches out and it seems like she just wants to be friends I'd suggest keeping your distance. You'll have to find out for yourself to what degree you need to stay away. Maybe if you drop whatever you're doing to go do whatever you need, you can try getting back when it's convenient. Try setting boundaries that you would keep with a friend for her and eventually it will probably sink in that she's just a friend. If that doesn't work you may need to stop talking to her in general. But the the less extreme stuff first.
>>
She doesn't owe you a romantic relationship just like you don't owe her a platonic relationship. If it's too painful get out of there and form new relationships that won't be. Normies will spout the "she doesn't owe you sex" line nonstop but they don't stop to think it works the other way too
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If you can't move on you need to stop being friends with her. There's nothing else you can do.
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>>21590199
>it will probably sink in that she's just a friend
Does that ever happen?
>>
Listen OP you need to fuckin bail now. Pull away quietly, trying to be friends with her is gonna eat you alive, you don't need that shit. Go to the gym and get fuckin hueg, let someone else enjoy what you have to offer.
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>>21590697
>>21590270
It's not intuitive to suddenly end stuff like that.
What if this makes her really sad?
It would look really weird to her from my side.
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>>21590764
She's not going to be sad, anon, she's already moved away from you.

You sound like you're still a teenager or a younger 20-something, more years will put all this shit in perspective. It hurts like a bitch to be hung up on someone who doesn't have the same feelings, but it's not going to hurt the same forever.
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>>21590829
She hasn't exactly moved away to that big of an extent.
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>>21590764
She probably will be sad, just like you're sad that she doesn't reciprocate feelings. That doesn't mean you have to stay there and cuck yourself. To expect you to do so is not being a very good friend either. This shit just happens sometimes, it sucks, but you should both do what's best for yourselves
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>>21590542
I've done it. I was friends with a girl and I fell for her. I kept reminding myself that she was a friend and I put up some boundaries and it worked. Eventually I realized that she only wanted me to be there when she was having troubles with the guy she wanted to be with and needed someone to vent to. It eventually got to the point to where even if I messaged first she didn't seem interested unless she felt like shit. I don't talk to her anymore. I'm not saying it will get that bad with you but I just had to keep my boundaries and it eventually clicked with me.
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>>21590764
Nah you're not listening nigger, you're gonna subject yourself to this bullshit in a vain attempt that she gives you a crumb of her bussy, pull away from her. Stop sending her messages first she'll take the hint. Realize your self worth.
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>>21582548
>fucks anything that has a hole, or can penetrate a hole
>won’t fuck anon
She’s a disgusting dirty slut, and you’re sad.
>>
man me fucking too
he's asexual now though, but man
them whoring around with other people would crush my soul man
I'm so sorry for you anon
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>>21582600
preach it preach it
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>>21582548
I'm ok with not fucking female freinds, but for me getting friendzoned like this means its time to ghost them, or ask them out since you're clearly beta
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>>21590270
Speaking as a cishet, that "she doesn't owe you sex/a relationship" line is only fully appropriate in one situation: if you are actually mistreating someone for not returning your feelings. If you're feeling resentment (and expressing it to unrelated parties) but are treating the object of your affections perfectly fine, that's a borderline case, but I'm leaning towards "You're handling it fine and don't deserve to be scolded."

But if you aren't mistreating the person in question and aren't even feeling resentful, but rather simply depressed, anyone that brings out the line about "owing" can go fuck themselves. Unrequited love hurts. It is okay for it to hurt. "She doesn't owe you anything" in contexts like this would be invalidating for no good reason, along with being somewhat aggressive and harsh reprimanding over a thought crime they weren't even guilty of to begin with.
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>>21590270
this
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>>21593028
This. That line is parroted too often where it doesn't make any sense or you're just making someone who already feels like shit who didn't do anything wrong feel worse.
>>
She's just not that into you.
It *hurts* but that's how it goes with anyone. Distance yourself to the extent that you can start to see others as prospects, move on. If something happens one day then it will naturally, and not by you ensuring you're right there to seize every possible opportunity to get a smile in. Trust me. All relationships develop naturally when that dynamic is there. Appreciate what you like in this girl and know that's something to look for to have a fulfilling relationship with someone else.
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>>21593028
>>21593315
Did you both just read half of the first sentence and stop? There's a valid point in there
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>>21593360
I'm the second anon and I think what the first person was saying is true but it doesn't mean what they replied to is wrong entirely. I don't really know why they pulled that line out though. Of course nobody owes anyone a relationship and what OP is saying has nothing to do with that since they're not acting entitled.
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>>21593315
It's good to know I'm not the only one who feels this way. We're definitely a minority nowadays.

>>21593360
Yeah, anon's post was fine - I was replying to the tail end of their post, where they say normies deliver that quote all the time.
>>
I needed to see this.

I'm in a very weird situation rn and basically fall on both sides of the coin in different degrees. Cis hetero male; I had a gay male friend who was interested that messed me up kinda. Kinda distanced myself from him but we have so many mutual friends that I wasn't ghosting. Seems to have worked because he was a virgin then but has done stuff in the interim. I should really reach out and talk to him about it; it's been almost two years since and things are still weird for me but we can get over it.

On the flip side, I have a trans friend that I'm super close with and have only gotten closer with for the past couple years. Didn't generate these feelings about a month ago, she is about to move back here and I was torn on whether to say something.

There's a lot of context that if prompted I could share, I logged on to post a thread desu but I realize from OP now I should follow my heart and say something next I see her in person. I think I can can live with either response desu I was more concerned with ruining the friendship; it's important to me.
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>>21592915
Yes
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>>21593693
>I should really reach out and talk to him about it;
Don't. It will only hurt him.
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>>21596607
Hmmm. This is the route I have been taking but desu I hate just ignoring it. If bringing something up from the past is a bad idea though then I’m fine with not taking action.
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>>21598315
Yeah, don't get back in touch. No matter how long it's been all you'll do is dig up old wounds.
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>>21598315
He will always like you so stop getting in touch
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>>21593693
>I should really reach out and talk to him about it
But why? He's probably long over you by now. Getting closure for yourself after rejecting him feels weird as fuck he has no responsibility to help you with that. If you want to rekindle the friendship good luck but don't be the weirdo who's like we need to talk about how you were crushing on me 2 fucking years ago please bro I need this
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>>21582548
She probably doesnt wanna fuck you because she knows it will lead to you developing feelings and killing the friendship. Take a break away from the friendship, fuck some other women so you get it out of your system, and then go back to talking to her. If that doesn't fix it then it's probably the end of your friendship.
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>>21598481
friendship is already over bcs op fell in love
sad for him
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>>21598481
I guess she killed the friendship anyway
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>>21598481
He already caught feelings
>>
I'm a trans "girl" in love with a cis girl and I got friendzoned hard, it hurts but she just doesn't give a shit about me and I don't know how to move on
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>>21598404
Ok I can really appreciate the way you put this. Im dropping it. I’m really in my head about these things but we’ve been hanging out in group settings for the past while just fine I guess so I’m just gonna move on
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>>21582548
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>>21598494
How does love end a friendship?
>>
I feel like if you are honest with her and tell her that since her transition you’ve opened the possibility in your mind to loving her she would appreciate it. She may not feel the same way, but honesty is important. As long as you emphasize that you would rather preserve the friendship than explore these feelings (if this is the truth) than i’m sure she will understand. Even just letting her know how you feel can lift a massive weight off your shoulders, and if she doesn’t feel the same way then just take the time and try to appreciate the fact that you’ve got a wonderful friend that you enjoy enough to be willing to love, and surely that must mean a lot to you. Platonic love is often shrugged aside, especially by this community, but it can be just as if not more intimate than sex or romance. But good luck anon, hopefully you feel less conflicted moving forward!
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>>21598404
Well said, couldn’t agree more. That’s certainly not something you want to hold over somebody’s head, intentionally or accidentally
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>>21598404
The friend won't necessarily think it's "weird" (Believe it or not, many people out there in the real world are less judgmental than 4channers and won't wrinkle their nose and go "ewwww weird" over everything like you guys do), but it seems like a probably pointless conversation. After two years they're very likely over you. I have a close friend who used to be insanely in love with me, but those feelings died a long time ago, and that's despite us saying in contact. Gay friend has almost certainly moved on if they haven't talked much for two years.
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>>21599345
I hope he is over me. I still think about it a lot; largely because there was a huge shift in our friendship. I was just shutting him out and I’ve been worried about the effect it would have on him but never changed my actions or anything. Nothing recent seems to be an issue but I still can’t comfortably talk to him 1 on 1 anymore. My hang ups with the situation are my problems, however, and I truly hope those events do not affect him right now.
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>>21583261
sunk cost etc
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>>21583452
cuckholdery feels bad
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>>21584391
4U
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>>21599606
How is it cuckoldry?
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>>21590764
This is why you're a fucking beta male.
Grow a fucking spine and ditch the bitch.
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>>21599588
You did the right thing. There was no better to do it.
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>>21582548
Hit the gym, twink
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>>21599345
No it definitely is weird. An ex hitting you up after two years of radio silence to get closure is weird. Some dude who rejected you two years ago doing the same thing is incredibly weird
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>>21600659
I'm worried about her
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>>21582600
Mega based.



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