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>tfw agp was just someshit i coomed to growing up
>now im 2 months hrt, voice training, stopped training upper body entirety, regularly practicing makeup, seeing a gender therapist, and just came out to someone i know irl as trans

i guess this is it haha my life is a meme and i threw away all my male social capital haha why can't i just be normal why did i let this agp shit take over my life
i wouldnt feel so bad about this if i just had gender dysphoria exclusively rather than dysphoria and agp
fuck my lifeeee
>>
Once you pass you can live your agp fantasies and it's actually pretty fun.
>>
>>19207299
Stop browsing this board. You have let the /pol/fag and blanchard memes get to you. These retards aren't even trans, even if agp is real its just a fetish you might have on top of your dysphoria, it doesnt make you faketrans or some bullshit. Stop falling for 4chan memes.
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>>19207308
my agp fantasies are me just having a female body and doing the stuff i normally did as a guy like going to the gym, playing guitar and going to concerts
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>>19207413
isn't that just wanting to be a girl in general?
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>>19207299
>all my male social capital
Stop fooling yourself, you never had one to begin with.
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>>19207976
AGPs want to be girls, who could have seen that coming?
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>>19207299
AAAAAAAA SAME ALSO NICE DUBBS
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>>19207347
>These retards aren't even trans
Really? If I just flush my hrt the dysphoria won't come back? as it never real dysphoria in the first place?
>>
>>19207299
>>19207413
can you be honest with me here, why did you create this thread?
>my agp fantasies are me just having a female body and doing the stuff i normally did as a guy like going to the gym, playing guitar and going to concerts
this is typical trans shit. Did you create this thread so that people would say "you're a regular tranny, grow the fuck up and don't take 4cgan brainworms seriously"?
Because I don't think you're that fucking stupid
>>
>>19208880
>this is typical trans shit.
Almost like AGPs aren't weird fetishists or faketrans or any other transphobic nonsense and are actually just normal tranners!
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>>19208899
yeah, thanks, I'm aware. Kinda my point actually
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>>19208926
Right! OP's problem is that she sees "gender dysphoria exclusively" (which isn't even how it works) as more trutrans even though she knows she's dysphoric and is in fact a normal tranner.
>>
>>19208956
Ops problem is either
>being an attention whore who desperately needs random.anons to tell her she's a normal trans woman
Or
>she larps yet another agp related thread thinking that it will somehow shift how people meme this word around
>>
>>19208982
If it's the first then I hope the two of us have reassured her, and if it's the second then I still hope our replies are a step in the right direction for her by making it clear that AGP is simply tranner normal!
>>
>>19207976
Not OP but what fucks things over is the arousal. I masturbate to these mundane fantasies and that makes me feel like it's a fetish.
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>>19207308
this desu the other day I just lay in bed from 9 til noon feeling my body and almost tingling with pleasure all over at the feeling of knowing I created this, shit's pretty cash
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>>19209024
If it's a fetish how come AGPs who transition basically never regret it? Even when they do, it's never because they didn't like being a girl after all, it's because of a problem like discrimination or not passing. Never "It turned out it was just a fetish after all."
>>
you might never be a real woman but you can maxx to look like one at least
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>>19207299
>gender dysphoria exclusively rather than dysphoria and agp

lol

lmao
>>
>>19207308
honestly its a shock to me still how I can enjoy life now. I thought I was 'doing fine...' before as a male, but just one year on HRT was enough to convince me I was severely depressed before. The first and only time I've ever really felt emotions like happiness or joy was only when I started being a girl.

This is coming from a major severe former teenage coomer. I wasn't some fruitcake fairy, I was a depressed dysfunctional autistic loner fapping to tg shit for years. Now I'm me, have loving friends, a loving boyfriend, some kind of future for myself (never existed before), all sorts of things. HRT is magic.
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>>19209300
which specific hormones did u take and how long before ur mood improved
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>>19209407
i first took estradiol and spiro, then switched to cypro. I was full of anxiety at first that I was doing something "huge and scary", but also relief that I finally got myself on HRT which i'd dreamed about doing for most of my life since I first heard about it. My dosages were 2mg estradiol swallowed and 100mg spiro/25mg cypro, then 4mg estradiol and 12.5 cypro. then i did my est sublingually

it took a long time to accept I was "actually trans" or to let myself enjoy my own transition, about a year desu, but once I did it's been wonderful. Still a ton of hardships but it's worth it. I mean, I have fucking boobs now. I love my boobs so much. and my fatty thighs. And my smile. And everything. It's also just been fun to improve and feminize myself, to get a good dosage or diet or excercise routine, to work on my makeup and fashion, etc. It's fun. I wish I was able to grow up like a fun girl instead of being locked away in front of my computer my whole life. I started at 27 btw

also if you're thinking about this please voice train. voice training honestly kept me sane in my pre-HRT years just for being a girl online etc.
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you're gonna make it, OP
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>>19209109
>If it's a fetish how come AGPs who transition basically never regret it?
Because they're cooming constantly.
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>>19210848
literally coom once a month and its totally dry. dont even care about it anymore. gonna get srs though.
I dont think my life is a coom, I think this is just how normal cispeople feel as a norm. The first time I felt real sexual arousal that was actually in tune with my feminized body (as a hot guy at work), it felt like the millions of sexually charged love songs and movies etc out there made by cis people. THEYRE the coomers.
>>
Quiters turn into losers, and losers are forgotten. You're gonna make it OP. The only real shame is whenever you give up.
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>>19209267
?!?
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>>19208834
Anon’s talking about the shitheads who spam blanch memes and stuff like that, not trannies with AGP.
>>
>>19207308
God I wish I could pass.
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>>19208001
nah I did, im not the stereotypical tranny incel, I have a social life, people invite me out to do stuff, women crush on me regularly

>>19208880
no i literally mean those are my literal agp fantasies, like it gets me hard, ive jerked off to the thought of doing normal things like go to the gym, but as a woman. i know its disgusting. obviously i can get off to being fucked as a woman, but everything is based around the fact that in my fantasies I look like a normal woman hence the agp.
>>
>>19209510
How tall are you and how did you look like before?

I'm 27 myself and your journey sounds like so much fun to embark upon
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>>19214311
>i know its disgusting.
Why?
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>>19214659
i dont know tb h it just feels like im always gonna be larping as a woman no matter what i do

the sexual aspect of it sort of taints any authenticity the gender dysphoria has for me
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>>19215625
>sort of taints any authenticity the gender dysphoria has
In what way?
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>>19209024
Am I the only transbian here that didn't do this shit? I really like the idea of just doing my life as a cis female version of myself but I never jacked off to it. Shit's weird
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>>19216067
no it's not that weird, probably just a lower libido agp
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>>19209109
What about people who detrans?
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>>19214311
hrt will help control your libido.
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>>19209300
you sound like me, massive dysfunctional coomer to a girl with a fairly normal life and bf
does it ever feel weird looking back on that time of your life? sometimes I just can't reconcile myself with the fact that I used to be like that
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>>19216312
not her but please greentext the shift from dysfunctional 'boy' to normal girl
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>>19216419
I mean it's not a particularly interesting story, I was just a NEET who spent most of my day cooming or playing video games then I transitioned and my life got a lot better very quickly
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>>19216118
But its not sexual at all for me
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>>19216454
it depends on your libido and also how much you repress growing up. when did you transition? what have you masturbated to before?
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>>19216475
Normal libido
Minimal repression
Age 23 for hrt
Softcore pics of women. Nothing too crazy
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>>19216579
>Softcore pics of women.
this seems really common for agps, not just transbians even
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>>19216444
but that reconciling difficulty, the contrast you feel between now and then, tell that story
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>>19207413
That's my life too. It's great! It's like normal life, but with more happiness.
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>>19209510
based, congrats
>>
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>>19216419
its nothing interesting

childhood
>bullied all the time growing up
>crybaby, wimp, small, weak, read books alone all the time
>some slight gender confusion (no aversion to girl things, thinking I'd look like mom when I grew up, other odd things), met with strict discipline from parents
>grow resentful and afraid of others, intense anxiety disorder

adolescence
>quiet detached loner that can't speak properly, barely dress or groom myself, try to make self invisible
>start living life in online forums or lost in my head in depressive fantasies or telling myself I'm worthless
>start fantasizing being a girl when I "fap" (prone), look up gender transformation stuff, think all boys are like me
>all my peers were starting to date and grow larger and I was still my weird stunted self
>slowly realize I'm different and "broken", that I don't think about girls or myself how I'm supposed to
>identity crisis over gender/sexuality, mental breakdowns, terror/desire at being trans
>say my gender feelings are just depression, just a fetish, etc
>a freak like me isn't allowed to transition, I don't deserve to be a girl anyways, I could never be feminine

adult
>NEET shut-in for years, no job prospects, no relationships, just pretending to be a girl online
>realize I'm going to kill myself if I reach 30 years old in this state
>pursue HRT at 27

>>19214353
I'm 5'7, and didn't look like much before. Never been hit on or flirted with or asked out etc. I tried to trap online sometimes but I couldn't pass well before HRT filled out my cheeks. Once late twenties male ageing started to take a hit I panicked. Puberty was very weak for me and one of the reasons I felt different from from everyone.

>>19216312
Yes I deal with imposter syndrome and "trauma" from how I grew up (it's still hard to call it trauma) which sometimes pulls me out of the moment with feelings of "I don't deserve this, I'm just a male loser" etc and want to get help for it.
>>
>>19216635
its an ongoing process desu but the contrast is unlike anything desu...I think it's something nobody but a tranny could understand or appreciate. It can still be painful baggage though, living your whole life with untreated pain like that.

>>19216722
thank you :) being a girl is definitely wonderful and feels like I'm actually alive now. Things are still hard but it's nothing like before where every day was a struggle.

>>19216579
>Minimal repression
well that could explain it. I was constantly afraid of being disowned if I said anything due to my parents disposition.
>>
>>19216777
>>19216825
but what's it like looking back and seeing a boy when now you're a girl? a girl like you wished to be for so long, but now for real?
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>>19216122
Talk to detransitioners, ask why they detransitioned. Not one, ever, is because AGP made her fake or not really want to be female.
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>>19217015
its painful desu. if I was just given some estrogen growing up I could've been happy. if I wasn't tortured by anxiety maybe I could've been normal. If I could've just been allowed to be a girl I wouldn't have wasted so much time in mental torture. I used to resent my old self and now I just feel sorry for him.

There is perhaps a sense of wonderment that such a transformation could actually occur (just like in the stories!), and sure, that's a bit exciting. That if I met my teenage self, he would've been amazed at how he turned out, both body and personality wise, at how much healthier and genuinely happier I am as a woman. Maybe he'll start actually believing all his teenage fantasies of being in a wedding gown married to some handsome groom someday, too. If I could change so much, it helps me motivate myself to believe I can change more, or do other things I'm scared of, and believe in other people being able to change as well.

But it doesn't really help erase all the time I wasted. nothing ever will. stupid repressors here ask why "pinkpillers" do what they do, and that's why.

>>19217027
theyve been saying it for decades, "all the agp trenders are gonna etc etc" blah blah, and it's never happened. "AGPs" love transitioning. if I didn't transition I'd be dead right now and wouldn't be typing this message.
Lots of transgirls do feel insecure and invalidated but that affects every kind of tranny regardless regardless of sexuality, because we live in a society. I'm a straight transgirl myself. it never really helped me
>>
a good thread >>19195774
>>
>>19215985
idk i cant make any genuine argument as to why its just a feels over reals type of thing for me

>>19216289
yea im 2 months in and ive definitely noticed that

>>19216715
based, im happy for you
>>
>>19217617
your sexuality doesn't invalidate your pain
>>
>>19217893
Anon it sounds like you're struggling with being a FUCKING TRANNY, take some god damn pills
>>
>>19217893
nobody reads through this shit past the first few words retard
poltards have become wall of text leftists
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>>19217617
>its just a feels over reals type of thing for me
But your AGP feels tell you being a girl is the right thing!
>>
>>19217893
>They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a man is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably male.
lol I already have an advance directive and my work is already archived forever by the government, marked with my real name, keep seething though
>>
>>19217886
yea i know...

>>19218107
yeaahhh i mean thats why im transitioning but fuck idk...
>>
>>19217993
>>19218088
>>19218291
stop giving them (You)s retards
>>
>>19217095
>Maybe he'll start actually believing all his teenage fantasies of being in a wedding gown married to some handsome groom someday, too.
<3
>>
>>19218418
OP you need to accept that AGP doesn't invalidate dysphoria. Of course an AGP going to feel bad when she'e not female, and what's the treatment for not being female? Transition! So AGP validates your dysphoria, it's what proves your dysphoria is genuine.
>>
>>19218455
Why? What’s he gonna do with them, pay rent?
>>
>>19218625
ill be more warmed up to the idea the longer i stay on hrt, just gotta let the changes happen to my body i guess
>>
>>19218676
He's gonna keep shitposting and keep derailing. Give people like that the bare minimum attention, report them, and wait till they go away.
>>
>>19218778
Good girl, enjoy the AGP life.
>>
>>19216312
>>19216777
literally me except I turned out a gross non-passer
>>
>>19220019
:( im sorry anon
we've both lived through a lot of pain though
>>
>>19216777
>>pursue HRT at 27
And now you have a bf?
>and "trauma" from how I grew up (it's still hard to call it trauma)
I'm sorry anon. How bad was it and how does it affect you now? I hope people in your life like your bf help.
>>
>>19216777
>start fantasizing being a girl when I "fap" (prone), look up gender transformation stuff, think all boys are like me
This is like a 100% accurate predictor of gender dysphoria.
>>
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>>19217893
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>>19221093
Do cis AGPs not do it?
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>>19221093
I see the masturbation thing constantly from trannies here but I've never seen it in any literature about dysphoria (outside of an autobio or two)
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>>19221125
lmao, why would people write about how they masturbated in early puberty (assuming they can even remember it)?
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>>19221125
It doesn't fit the narrative that trans = super girly kid + body issues
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>>19221279
It fits, just not in the way that most people would find cute.
>>
>>19221335
It fits if you know trans isn't simply acting girly when you're supposed to be a boy, but the cultural narrative around trans people doesn't know that.
>>
>>19221169
well idk it just seems like it could be important. arent these models supposed to be like, in depth and stuff? obviously its an embarrassing details but like...idk
the fact its even found in repressors who are disciplined hard or have no knowledge of trans stuff is pretty telling

>>19221279
i mean body issues does mean theyll interact with their body in weird ways too
and it kind of is...'acting girly'...way more than like, some kid painting their nails or something. but I guess to the public, campy effeminacy is always how its framed.
>>
>>19221558
>i mean body issues does mean theyll interact with their body in weird ways too
Yeah but but the BDD or ED kind of body issue that get confused with dysphoria.
>>
AGP is literally just manifestation of gender dysphoria. Don't beat yourself up over it. Who gives a fuck if you're "fake" anyways, if you're happier on estrogen than testosterone than that's what you should be on.
>>
>>19221692
False. Gender dysphoria is a manifestation of AGP.
>>
>>19209510
We're all gonna make it. Every last one of us.
>>
>>19221725
anon lol...I actually wrote that post too...
I'm glad it helped you a bit :)

>>19221685
>ED
lol I know you mean eating disorder, but I remember reading "omg does prone masturbation cause erectile dysfunction!?" forum threads when I was a kid. I tried to force myself to stop doing it that way, thinking it would make my fantasies normal if I "did it" normal first. It didn't work of course lol
I wonder how many others on that thread ended up like me too...
>>
>>19221846
I really like screencapping posts of people's stories and whatnot like that. It's like my own little scrapbook of anonymous memories, little pieces of the human experience that someone wanted to share.
>>
>>19221846
>but I remember reading "omg does prone masturbation cause erectile dysfunction!?" forum threads when I was a kid.
that scared me too tbhon
>>
>>19209510
sauce?
>>
>>19222003
like a little internet yearbook for tranners!
>>
>>19222294

Kyoukai No Nai Sekai
its apparently not supposed to be that good lol
>>
>>19218291
>my work
what is your work?
>>
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>>19221113
I certainly didn't, when I started fapping I just started fapping like normal, I think the first time I was made aware people fapped like this was on /b/ years back, and I didn't like the idea because it sounds like too much friction to be comfortable or pleasurable so I didn't do it
>>
>>19223051
its more about pressure than friction, youre not supposed to move much during it. making it feel flat (and thus easier to imagine having a vagina) is I think the goal.
>>
>>19217893
came here to post this
>>
>>19223051
what does picture mean?
>>
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>>19223632
it means- giwtwm
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>>19214157
whats the matter anon
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>>19209018
shut up groomer. you're probably a hon
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>>19225155
shut up repper
>>
>>19223632
Normal japanese female attire anon.
>>
>>19216777
>>start fantasizing being a girl when I "fap" (prone)
what does prone mean ? I dont understand what this is supossed to mean
>>
>>19220019
Same. Unless you're a tiny ass twink being AGP is just an absolute curse.
>>
>>19225395
its just laying on the bed and making ur dick flat, ie. no stroking it
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>>19225461
hrt can still help you fill out in the right ways even if youre not super tiny
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>>19225553
Is it still prone if you’re squeezing it while your lying down? I don’t ever stroke it, but I keep my hand on my groin and apply pressure.
>>
>>19207299
ik how you feel anon im fucked up too, never forget that you are a fuck up, be realistic with your expectations and dont give into dysphoria, once you fall for the "im a real woman" nonsense its over for you
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>>19207299
Let go of other's expectations, live a life solely for your pleasure, and never look back. Best decision i ever made
>>
>>19216777
pain
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>>19225553
i would straddle and hug a body pillow and face the bed prone and cum that way is that normal
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>>19226321
>>19227094
those are both common variations of prone masturbation yes
>>
>>19207299
>i guess this is it haha my life is a meme
:)
>>
>>19226473
based



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