>>35509871
I also started on cypro, is that an actual problem with cypro?
I got my ball cut off so no anti androgen now maybe they'll grow ?

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>>35509899

yeah most of my growth came from prog + eating recently. i have stretch marks on them bc they grew too fast for a bit :|

here is 1 year (and like 15lbs) ago.

>>35510014

oh. um... just weighed myself, it's actually +30lbs... T^T
well, if u do fatmaxx make sure to at least have good levels and be on pio lol...

>>35510014
thank you. this has alleviated some of my worries. it’s night for me now so imma go to bed, take care!

>so many cute girls
>none of them are my gf

>>35508353
Total bullshit. Just treat it like someone with an imaginary friend.

>>35508353
yeah this is straight up DID

>>35508779
I can't because the ones who I know who do this do it at the lgbt club where everyone will be pissed at me if I start drama and where pluralism is officially endorsed

>>35508353
i was in a discord server with someone like this before they schizo'd out. very mentally unstable person. but anyways, they had literally 5 pages of names and identities, along with each one's various pronouns. it has to be attention seeking

>>35509915
I can't speak for you obviously but I'd have to *really* want to be part of the community to put up with that nonsense. And even then I'd almost certainly have to avoid addressing the mod to the point where people would notice and drama would flare up anyway.

If "pluralism" means you have to be inclusive of everyone's hangups and delusions, no matter what they are, I think that's just not tenable. And yeah, I feel 100% justified in saying this is a hangup and not "queer culture" or whatever. Forcing people to say "we" and somehow pretending you're not forcing them to enter in some weird implied relationship every time they talk to you has nothing to do with being queer. I'd be open to an explanation of *why* I should be considering this normal and having my mind changed, but I *really* doubt I'd get a good one.

>>35509422
>>35509600
way off in nationality and age
>>35509479
>portuguese
scarily close

>>35509273
Bi / 20 / Can't guess nationality SAY WORDS probably swedish or smt
>>35509479
Tranny / 22 / American
>>35509600
you roll R's nice / hard to guess stuff since idk what yr saying but like probably Spain / Gay (I have no idea how to discern mexican spanish from others so)
>>35509640
gato,.,. likely a femboy, / 19 / same as last one
if im super off with like anything obvious cut me some slack im kinda a dumbass
https://vocaroo.com/1gpjLPmBRvcG

>>35509769
https://voca.ro/1t29qXk4x4GO

>>35509574
waow what gave away im canadian and started hrt early. age is off tho
>>35509661
hehe im in ur walls

https://voca.ro/172TgVf3f0U2

>>35507291
few hours of no responsibilities and joy. empty, cold, realization and crushing stress after

>>35507314
tfw you give in and enjoy those desires you have been repping only to come out of the haze, realise what you did, and what you are

>>35507291
Sissies need to fuck off.

>>35508169
at this point im convinced its a psyop

MtNB and it still makes me uncomfortable because it's overly flamboyant and feels like performance. I don't want to act, I want to BE. The biggest issue is that many drag performers are "cis" and perform for fun. By comparison I fucking hate myself and do not want to be observed by others.

I still hold a lot of internal shame though. I try to condition against it. I'm a little more comfortable after accepting feminine presentation, meeting a drag performer, talking and hanging out until the flamer voice no longer registers, going to some shows. Hanging out with mtf, crossdressers, flamers and everyone else has been the good for my reducing my shame

>>35509521
> I have heard this 'woman blackface' take before and don't really agree with it; no woman really acts like these performers do.
And black people don’t act like they were portrayed in minstrel shows.

>>35509569
>And black people don’t act like they were portrayed in minstrel shows.
I'm talking about appropriation (how I don't agree with it) while you're talking about stereotyping. It's impossible to appropriate gender because, one way or the other, if you grew up in this society, no matter who you are, you were raised within it. It's impossible to steal or to misrepresent or to plunder another gender in this way; it's all just a distortion of a culture we all share equally. Comparing drag shows to minstrel shows is assinine. Gender is the least sacred thing there is; you should be free to do what you wish with it.

>>35509774
Yeah turns out if you mince enough words and invent your own definitions enough you really do just get to be right about everything since nobody knows what the seemingly barely relevant yapping you’re doing is about

>>35508964
I hate rupauls drag race and but there’s lots cool drag queenz

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>>35507514
>idiosyncratic cant of performative offensiveness works as intended and drives away another outsider
You love to see it.

Niggers tongue my anus, Hitler did nothing wrong, God hates fags.

>>35507514
mentally unprepared

>>35507514
4chan lets you peek beyond the veil.
All the insecurities that you’re subconsciously repressing and protecting yourself from layed out for you to see, extracted from the most damaged version of yourself.

>>35507652
jesus CHRIST look at how fried and miserable her hair looks...
like goddamn girl what the fuck did you shampoo your hair with acid or something?

>>35507980
this place isn't as bad as the average person's perception of 4chan, but it's still pretty bad honestly. yeah, sometimes you get the good threads with good advice/diy info and non-shitheads which is why i keep coming back to this fucking forsaken place, but i have to ignore and sift through so many dogshit threads to get to the 10% thats actually good. The brainworms people get from here are immense and I don't think I'm better off after having been here. i'm not saying babytrans subreddits are better though, they have their own major problems.
>>35508001
like i wouldn't even consider most of it "banter", yeah there's self-loathing abound, but any thread about something at least mildly polarizing definitely has unapologetic animosity. too many bait threads/first posts

>>35509526
>>35509550
Not OP but I'm curious if anyone has any tips for where to practice if you don't have a private space at home

>>35509526
How do I find these servers? I’ve voicetrained to myself a fair bit and want a place to practice

>>35509376
commit yourself to a vow of silence. best way to voice train

>>35509820
white noise machine

>>35509820
I voicetrain in my car

>>35506818
>class
Sad to see that nothing ever changes even in kids now.

>>35506714
Transbians disparage men to try to fit in with cis women e.g. finding any common ground with men gets you called a pick me.

>>35506714
I wish men were oppressed so you moid worshippers would had something to actually complain about, because every day a new "b-but the poor men :(" thread saying the same meme gets boring
You need to stop having sympathy for these violent animals, you not a man, stop seeing yourself as one

>>35507997
I mean they kinda do it everywhere. In any tranny community there will be transbians and they will be complaining about straight men as they sexually harass the straight trans girls.

>>35508162
Is this an inevitable side effect of the trans condition?

>>35509876
obviously yes. better late than never

>>35509876
>A
are you going to kill yourself? yes if yes, no if no
>B
yes
>C
no kill yourself instead actually

>>35509876
depends on how far you want to go with the transition, what your starting position is, and if you actually have dysphoria. B sounds at least a little bit like it.

i would suggest just trying it out and look how it makes you feel, you dont have to present female in public, i would rather suggest not to unless you know youre not being made fun of.
fetishes can align with that desire i guess, so i wouldnt use it as an argument against, if you hate the effects of e on your body, just stop

>>35509876
>A
yes , can't destroy/damage what you dont have
>B
Not really, you'll probably look your age, just female (if it goes well)
>C
useless, you can try roleplay but no one will force you to be more fem, it is the opposite that you have to force the fem , meaning it's not good conductive for a fetish

>>35509876
better late than even later
better now than in 6 months or 6 years from now

imagine how you'd feel if you could go back in time 10 years, thats how you 10 years in the future will feel about you right now

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>>35494619
>oCo
is this an abstract owo? So rare it's foil if it is.
>>35495202
Ah that sucks, had that last year for a week or so. Food sounds lovely though!
Hope therapy went well. Whatcha reading?
>>35495526
improovanon, that you? I haven't seen you around on matrix in a while, have you been ok?
>>35495787
All the best panty. Whatcha gonna put in the fried rice?
Your roomie is right that you should at least have a time window. Having a "when do I start" and "is a small milestone in sight" is far more important than "when is the final thing done as a whole".
>>35497027
That is a lot better. Care and self care will make you feel better in ways sh won't.
>>35500404
KEK. Not a tranner but what can we do for you on the self improvement front?

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My diet is too efficient, I added an extra meal to slow down the rate a little. 1kg/week is excessive given I am already normal weight and only wanna lose 3 more kg.
>>35501366
You won't need OMAD for now, don't worry. 95% of my time was not OMAD, just a 1500kcal flat diet, with a +-200kcal margin of error. Any time of day, any food.
>Idk, just not trying to get an ED here even if i have that brainworm.
And I am happy you are being careful! It's good you are.
>>35503341
It is difficult since what you describe is definitely within the realm of trauma, which is difficult to overcome. We are not rational automata. There is a scared animal in each of us. Having a pro pick away at it may help. We have some things on the subject too in the resources. it is already very good you have the oversight to recognize your brain worms. Yes it is hard not to run away. You associate vulnerability with being preyed upon. But.. what you need on that front is exposure. Sadly. Your psyche will project a predator onto everyone too close. This needs overcoming. Because of course it makes you crave intimacy to the point you seek out actually dangerous people giving it out at a cost. You know all this, of course. I am simply saying that you are clearly making an effort to get better, and I see that. You are NOT broken, and not a toy. You are a thinking, feeling person. Can we leverage your confidence against your brainworms? Distract you from the scary parts of human connection by having you bond over a shared passion?
>>35504742
Aggretsuko is in its own way pretty /sig/ a show, though I remember later seasons to be more fantastical/outlandish. Bonus points for Modeuscore image.
>>35504792
Did I ever tell you I made a small tarot bash script once?

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Goodnight for now.
>>35506331
> I either don't trust them, know they aren't empathetic or they don't care about me enough for it to be much more than just venting.
so you lack a support network in that sense.
I know you don't care about sh and don't feel like you or the consequences matter in the here and now. The carrot on the stick I have for you is that ultimately, I think you just would like to have as normal and enjoyable a life as possible.
And I mean it is a problem that you have nobody to open up to. I understand your reservations, and discounting the people you feel you cannot trust I 100% get that openness is hard, and your opportunities are limited. Do you feel there is someone you could trust/get closer to but are just inhibited to? Why do you distrust the people you don't? Let's discount for now the people who seem not empathetic and have not the mental energy to engage with feels.

>>35506531
Therapy went pretty well. We talked about my sorta avoidant traits. I get really scared interacting with my bf's friends. I feel like I'm bothering them. I've gotta start implementing DBT skills to actually force myself to talk and engage.
I'm reading the Long Discourses of the Buddha.

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Bump. I continue to succeed in my daily regimens of diet, exercise, and housekeeping. I've been modifying my greenhouse so as to prevent future immolation of contained specimens.
In unrelated news: I have discovered that I despise the cloying odor and flavour of white clover pseudanthia.

im a manmoder and I started 6 months ago at 21 i wanna end it all sometimes

>>35509764
welcome manmoder

>>35509765
oke yea and going by >>35509752 if its about completely passing then thats prob a good line

I thought it was by looks and presentation. Manmoder is super repressing, no hints. Boymoder is feminine, no longer cares about gay flagging

>>35509865
This is true, but it's usually just a side effect of the general mindset of each group >>35509573

good probably that your mom was so supportive
you should be incredibly grateful that you were that lucky

is this supposed to be a brag?

>wooo i started hrt early and my mom wanted me to be a girl i feel so bad

>>35507987
based

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>>35509666

Curry munchers are easily the most unattractive race. Sad thing is though you still look better than 99% of the retarded obese AGP's on here

>>35509666
repper

>>35509686
>South Asian
Lmao.

>>35509842
Yes dumbass. East Asia, Central Asia, South Asia. Did you not learn Geography in school? Any education at all stupid?

>>35509839
No, I have more respect for the English language than that.

>>35509839
no

Literally a mental illness

>>35506299
I guess that's it for me

>>35478553
nope, sorry family. Bicalutamide and raloxifene gave me pointy puffy breasts. I think even one or the other could cause minor breast growth. I was really concerned about judgement but I did exposure therapy by girlmoding in public. Nobody cared, NOBODY. I swim with a tank-top now, but I should really get a one-piece + skirt and girlmode.

Why is ordering this shit so hard?
Maybe tomorrow

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this might be better suited for /fit/ but...
finasteride, dutasteride, or something else for preventing hairloss? I've lost basically nothing yet but expect to start losing some soon due to age and genetics

>>35509324
*commits a sudoku*