Gotta do a best man speech and I'm having a hard time of it bros.Dude rode with me weekly road trips to visit my cancer addled grandmother until she died.Was best man at my wedding and best bro growing up.Am a broke redneck retard and he is marrying into some wealthy Hispanic folks. Small town. I am legitimate good frie ds with his 5 brothers. I gotta nail this or they will all hate me forever. I don't like speeches. I got about 40 seconds of solid speech but it needs to be 2 or 3 minutes right?I can't find SHIT online that helps or isn't some cheesy reused stolen joke.I'm fucked guys. The wedding it Thursday and I took my first vacation in mybadult life in my 40s just to write this.I'm up to 1 inside joke and a gift that nobody but bro cares about.How the fuck do I do this bros?
>>2233111Anon, please tell me how to gain good communication skills.
>>2231431She offered her honor,He honored her offer,And now, all night, he'll be on her and off her.
>>2231431I didn't realize the best man speech was a big deal. I stood up said few words - looked out over the giant, wealthy audience of 500 people, and froze up. I couldn't breathe. I think I said "family is made not born, love you" and sat down. one of the most cringey moments of my life
>>2233111share sales tips. teach me how to manipulate people to buy stuff
>>2234279Same here. I had pretty much fallen out with the groom when he invited me to be best man so I really had a hard time mustering up more than a 30 second speech. Even so I still cringe about how short it was.
You do buy a large portion of your hand tools at antique shops and flea markets, right anon? There's no way you pay for full priced tools at big box stores that are half the quality of their vintage second hand counter parts, right?
>>2232559They aren't. One on the right is a rip and the other two are crosscuts with probably different teeth number or something.
>>2233446They look like turn of the century Warranted Superiors, they have that big brass insert on the handles that has the name on 'em. Very collectible. Just one of those "I know what those are" from some old searches for vintage tools.
I steal all my tools from construction sites.- Ahmed Arbury
>>2233559My old man had a thing for old Disston saws and bought a bunch of them at auctions.
>>2233669>- Armed Robberyfixed
Hello /diy/I've seen that massage guns are becoming increasingly popular, however it seems they are quite expensive. I already have a 3d printer (ender 3 pro) and some knowledge of soldering and electronics however I know nothing about micro controllers. I figured, instead of spending upwards of $300 on a massage gun I could probably build one of decent quality and potentially sell them if it turns out good. Pic unrelated
>>2234162Minithumper pro 2 is best handheldThe maxi-pro equine is what i use.Be honest, your making a fucking machine
>>2234162why the fuck do you need a microcontroller for a vibrator
explain what you think a massage gun is and how a cheap 3d printer and kind-of knowing how to solder allows you to make a good one for less than retail price
What are some easy, low-energy productive things I could do with my spare time that would/could be useful now and in the event of economic collapse and civil war?To clarify, I'm working on some health issues (energy conversion/processing issues in my body + mental & emotional stuff) that make it almost impossible for me to do regular work, so I'm feeling really useless.So, other than continuing to work on my health and getting stronger, what are some ideas for small projects that I could begin working on now? A trade-style or hobby-based thing would work.
>>2233547Oh it’s a paperclip jammed in the soil. It’s Florida so sometimes we get like a week of heavy rain and the soil gets super saturated and the cactus (cactii?) don’t like it, so I was using the paperclip to aerate the soil to help it dry faster.
>>2233857That dong shaled cactus was like 4” tall when I got it, now it’s 3ft tall and too fucking unstable in any pot I try to plant it in. That little light green one was like 2” across, now it’s like 8” across and parts of it are in 4 different little planters.
>>2228575Grow a small tomato plant. Easy to keep alive. Free food. Just water it and harvest when its ready.Mine is in the unused smoke room. Its comfy.
>>2228834>crops like meatbased meat harvester
>>2229352This, and can turn it into a business later if you get a good tasting product.>>2229549Yeah, ammo is super easy. I know guys that spend all weekend doing it getting drunk watching football. With where ammo prices are now, it's actually kinda worth it. Just need them to bring you spent brass. >>2229560Great for self sustainment if you don't mind eating beans and rice all the time. It will cut your food costs down a lot and save you money that way.
Hello,I'm having troubles finding resources to calculate the energy I could harvest by installing a handful of evacuated tubes hanging vertical on my balcony.This is a dyi project and it's about learning and having fun, not really trying to run my house on steam power or throw away my water heater but I'd like calculate the feasibility of:-Heating up about 30L of water at 50°C daily-How many BTU I could get out of it for heating air-How many watts a small (tiny) scale turbine could generateI couldn't find any resource online and also noting that includes historical data (clouds) for realistic estimates. The most useful information I've found is from the weather forecast website that gives me the current wh/m2 (which is 4070 today).Any help?
>>2233010Thanks for the tips, I'll download the book. As I was saying, it's really hard (for me) to find reading material online.>>2233076I've seen this type of design but I can't make a panel for the balcony, I'll likely put the tubes on the railing and run the pipe behind it.Also, dealing with cutting glass, moisture, sealants and all of this is way too much work, I'd rather focus on piping and using a ready made and more efficient collector. Those solutions is definitely what I'd go for if I had more space
>>2233084>cutting glassWhat are you soing on this board?>moistureRetard>sealantRetard
>>2233118>>2233084Oh come on, you don't machine every screw.We all have materials from somewhere.
>>2231109Why not just build a wind turbine at this point? Tiny ones like on sail boats can do 200-300W on a good day, electric power converts to heat at 100% efficiency and it’s more effective in winter
Thermal solar for water is simple as shit. >switch valve prior to gas/electric heater used in winter. >plumb it to the roof>put them on the equator side>multiple arrays of copper pipes soldered together, with tin fins on them, painted black.>encase them all in aluminum boxes with glass windows on top.I did this when I was a kid with my dad. In third would countries they sell these setups but their all pot metal and unfinished. I'm sure you can find a company locally that sells a similiar kit that you just need to plumb in.
I assume it'll be different pending (sod or seed)If I level some bad areas with sand, can I then just lay sod over the top and water it? Flip side, can I lay seed in top of the existing red clay, then level with sand - will the seed do well?I have garbage red clay, no top soil. Looking for the easiest route to successful grass in shitty areas
>>2233895the area is probably bad because of erosion.seeding is cheaper, but time consuming. clay doesn't matter.>kentuckey bluegrass>scotts lawn care (fertilizer)>straw>waterSod is used because it is instant by comparison.
>>2234191other things to note.>grass doesn't grow in rocks.>crabgrass is invasive and a weed.>erosion control will do more to to help with bald spots in your yard than putting more sod/seed down.>grass will never grow if you constantly tear it up.
am confused if it is limited to picking up only dust, or if I can still use it with wood shavings or other items that I want to vacuum up.
>>2234131Use with anything. I pick up lathe and mill chips with mine.
>>2234163Thanks man! I am a well known retard and it's nice to know there are people out there willing to help people in my low ranking social class
I'm about to be in my thin-no ceiling cover- roofed s10 for about a month potentially. Best insulation? Just get a shell and do that? What do I then heat with thats not a bitch. Will obviously plop down some to not freeze. Pic not related.
Camping in the bed with a shell is absolutely shit. I spent 4 months doing that, and it was absolute dogshit. I had insulated it, added a mattress, curtains, etc. In fact, for my luck, nobody ever broke my windows and I never once got caught. However. Need to pee or poo? Well you'll do it in a bucket uncomfortably because you've no space left in the bed, so you're shitting and pooping on top of the mattress with a tarp that you need unravel in the mid of night and hope you don't accidentally splash anything in the dark, because you definitely don't want any light to lower detection rates.Then, the constant stress of people. Your best bet for safety is random neighborhoods that have vehicles of your quality. However, people will talk outsider your vehicle, sometimes for hours, and you will not sleep a moment of it while being tense as fuck. This kind of setup puts you in constant fight or flight mode.The worst part is you are effectively trapped. You cannot easily get to the cabin to drive, meaning in a shitty situation you have virtually no control over the outcome. It's very unpleasant when certain voices and characters are around and you can't just drive away.If I could go back I'd prefer parking my truck, and doing a hammock super stealth late night early morning rise setup. Even in a city there will be some dense patch of trees unless you are in the desert.Or, sell the truck and get an equivalent van/minivan. It's just better, because you don't have nearly same stress about driving away in a situation where you feel the need to do so.
>>2233271Also, do not attempt unless you want to become a hardened racist.
>>2233271If OP rents a campground space it could work. Doing it on the street is generally retarded. Agree on the hammock either way. It frees up the floor if used in a vehicle. As for pissing I'd drill a hole in the bed floor and use a funnel with a drain hose (worked fine on combat aircraft until piddle packs were invented). Shit during the day.
>>2232372If I ever catch one of you animals pouring out your shit bucket at the fenceline again, you're gonna have a bad time. Worse than when my grandpa caught two diggers in the chicken house. Keep away from human homes. Park your vehicle as far from others as possible and pour out your shit buckets close by and I won't bother you unless garbage starts blowing across the fenceline. Toilet paper will dry out and blow along so use it sparingly. Also, shit inside your vehicle. No one wants to see another human being living like this and most decent people will call the cops if they have to watch you poop.
>>2234104Hold your poop until the middle of the night and shit in a storm drain. It's the easiest way.
Well /diy/? What's the real reason?
>>2217966Ladies and gentlemen we have a genius on our hands, somebody get this man a medal.
>>2232829Its writing SOS on the bowl. It needs our help.
>>2232829You know I just learned the other say surprisingly that the world record for the biggest shit is held by a woman. A slim little arts grad student took a massive 26ft long shit to break the record.
>>2200483It's really been 3 years running for this meme huh?
>>2205994That is why you must be ready with a second piece to put down just before the subsequent turds hit the water. It'll be hard at first but after a lot of practice your hand-eye-anus coordination will be good enough to cushion even the mightiest poo volley. They say some Kung-poo masters in Tibet can gift wrap a turd bullet in TP before it even breaks the surface of the water.
Well, no more 3 way switches...
>>2233107It'd be cheaper to have a 3 way with a couple Vegas hookers
>>2233107You could go the usual route of buying cheaper ones, burn your house, and then complain that no one sells good stuff no more.
Hey /diy/, I have a cottage inna woods and I want to look at some long term food storage options for both emergencies and general usage. Right now the best I can do for temperature is an uninsulated cargo container that will fluctuate from -35C in winter to +35C in summer, so it can only be for storing dried goods, as the freeze-thaw cycles might cause much larger problems wet food stuffs like canned beans or fruits. To that end I'm looking at 75L Husky totes with build in O-Rings (picrel). The idea would be to purchase something like 10KG bags of rice from walmart until the bags fill the tote, then toss in a very large Uline desiccant pack (for moisture absorption) and an iron-based handwarmer (for oxygen absorption). After that then do the same with bags of sugar, and bags of dried beans, and bag of flour. I'll probably start with 5 totes and see how I feel about it. I'm always going to need these staples so I figure I can use it as a pantry going forward. If you can see any obvious reasons why this is stupid let me know. If you have any suggestions for temp stable staples I should store for future use or an emergency please let me know!
>>2232271NiceWe used like two drums of welding wire per shift. People fought over the drums because they were nice with snap-lock lids but really didn't give a shit about the dry packs or marbles
>>2232212I'm just going to use a few of the desiccant bags from my work for the fist few, they don't care. Totally agree about getting desiccant packs for free though, and you can "cook" some silica desiccants to the point of somewhat "reuploading" them. I mean it's free material. >>2232221I genuinely chuckled at this. >>2232246No, but I'll tell you about my idea to generate nitric acid using solar power if you ask politely.
>>2232296> leaves pointy sharp stump right before the door
>>2232115Mason jars are amply proven.
Store pemmican and hardtack in that order.
The Romans used lead, stone, and even clay cement to build pipes. If you've ever been to Rome, you'll know that many pipes are still delivering water to the same fountains they were a thousand years ago. It's actually truly astonishing to see any man made utility still functioning this long. So my question is...What happened? Why did we stop using stone pipes? Why on Gods green Earth have we forsaken stone? The Romans sewer system, aqueducts, piping system- they are all still working exactly the same as they've worked for hundreds of years. How can we even forgive ourselves for turning our back on such incredible works of engineering? I look at every single pipe on Earth as being inferior to what the Romans built. PVC, copper, steel -- nothing comes close to the power of stone. If we all weren't so fucking cheap, we could've built mega cities with mega stone stone sewers and stone piping. But noooooo, everyone wants to be a faggot and have some flimsy looking octopus tube thing behind their walls. PLEASE TELL ME I'M NOT ALONE HERE!
>>2227834>society is so deep into post-modernism that people are unironically getting triggered over the correct spelling of words
>>2227620>our entire society would crumble in a matter of years if neglected.who else would get maintenance contracts? Did you ever think of how a mayor is going to pay back the people who backed the campaign? Chicago wouldn't exist if it weren't for corruption and kickbacks.
>>2233319Sorry, I don't care about how your corrupt city functions. I just want monolithic stone spillways and stone sewers that look like cathedrals. I want stone castles that rise over our skyscrapers. Why not? Who are you to tell me I can't dream? I will build.
>>2227640>he regularly gets swindled by the Italian contractors who also get the repair jobs
>>2233345You won't build shit or you'd be building instead of posting.
Basement's apparently flooded.There's nothing down there, like it's been empty since I bought the place, it's basically just a giant concrete pool. My utilities/hvac/waterheater are in the attached garage so those things aren't even down there either. I don't recall the last time I opened the door to the basement. so it could have been in this flooded conditions for months. Since I'm out of work due to covid I don't really have the cash to have it looked at.Is there any harm in just leaving it for now? I haven't noticed any problems so far and it could have been like this for months at this point. I tried swimming in it but it was far too cold to enjoy. I could touch the bottom and my head was well above the water line, so it's about 4-5 feet deep
Schrodinger's basement flood: The Thread
More pics!
I would pimp it out, then pick up a dehumidifier and run it to get the residual moisture out. Foundational damage can be expensive along with the mold damage. Good luck bro
>>2230820fill it with trout
>>2231545Basement shitpit is actually a pretty good idea if you never plan on using it for anything else. You could put a hole in every room.
Holy fuck this shit is physical demanding. No wonder these assholes charge like 4-5$ a squarte foot.
>>2233181yes and no, like any profession there are loads of stupid people. I'm a network engineer but I'm going for my master electrician license because I'm tired of working with "IT pros" who can't diagnose simple problems.Solution? charge them for work they are scared to do
>>2232975I have literally never had this happen. Unless something was extremely time sensitive or maybe something where I had no margin for error, like wiring something I was unfamiliar with, paying a contractor for basic work is not logical.If I didn't enjoy doing the work, or at least the process of having it completed myself, the time vs cost may enter a calculus based on my average pay, but doing something yourself is very satisfying.
>>2232595i went through this too. i watched a bunch of videos and did a bunch of research into what products to use, and called the manufacture to verify, etc. after all of the research and proper material tool gathering i mixed a 50lb bag of TEC mortar with the TEC latex additive all at once as that seemed to be the general consensus for first timers to do, as to not fuck up the proportions.I then spent the next ~10 hours tiling a bathroom and part of the hallway going out. I had never worked with mortar or concrete before and I was blind sided by how much physical force was required for troweling and back buttering. The bathroom I started out in turned out good but the hallway area isn't straight. I will probably just replace it. I used 12x12 tiles I got on clearance for ~60 cents each so its not at all a financial blow or anything.
>>2232994>t. jobless tile installer who was just rejected from his 5th tech school application
>>2233811Those clearance tiles were probably out of square.
Vacant lot in the neighbourhood for micro-farm ? 1. what agreement do I need with the owner? fair price? 2. what plants/fruits/veg/flowers should I grow to make money? 3. do I need to hook up the water and electricity? 4. is it okay to farm in residential zone without a permit? use pesticides?
>>22323551. fair price would depend mostly on your location2. what plants are suitable mostly depends on your location3. whether you need water and electrical hookups is going to depend on the location4. what permits you will or won't need is going to vary, based on your location
>1. what agreement do I need with the owner? fair price?First thing to do is find out who owns the property. If it's not someone in the neighborhood, there's a very low chance they're going to notice if you start using it without permission.
>>2232355Why did they only shingle part of their roof? I've done just one side for people before because their insurance wouldn't pay for both, but I don't know why you would get 70% done with each side then just call it a day.
>>2232355>1. what agreement do I need with the owner? fair price?Start with zero. Ask:"Can I please use your empty lot to grow flowers and fruits and vegetables? I'll grow something you like to eat in exchange. I'll also beautify the property." >2. what plants/fruits/veg/flowers should I grow to make money?Grow heirloom varieties, use organic practices. You'll never compete with the grocery stores for something regular such as potatoes, but you may be able to provide something unique and harder to transport such as zucchini flowers.Go to expensive local restaurants and see their specials. Take note if they use any unique ingredients. I made a few hundred a week selling zucchini blossoms to restaurants directly.>3. do I need to hook up the water and electricity?Water yes, electricity probably not. You may annoy the neighbors.>4. is it okay to farm in residential zone without a permit? use pesticides?It'd be best if you didn't involve the government and pursue permits. It's a cost and a headache. Don't use pesticides, be natural. It's one of your edges over the competition. Also you risk annoying the neighbors.You may want to look into the book "You Can Farm" by Joel Salatin. Basically, he says he'd rather have 1 acre near the city than 100 acres far from the city. He outlines practices that you may find useful.
Why not farm across the street? Less of a chance of someone buying the lot and bulldozing all your work to build a house. No matter what, if you don't own the land it's just a matter of time before the owner boots you off and takes over whatever you were doing and does his own thing. But buying the land would be dumb since it's incredibly overpriced.
