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/an/ - Animals & Nature

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So /an/ what would you do
Your child ate some rat poison and at he same time your dog ate a lot of chocolate. The vet is at the west end of the town and the hospital is at the east end of the town. There is only time to safe one. How do you act?
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>>3987241
Call the ambulance for the kid and take the dog to the vet. If I play by your rules chocolate isn't immediately fatal either especially to medium or large breeds so I'll just take the kid then the dog.
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>>3987241
Call 911 and either me or my partner ride with the ambulance while the other one takes the car to the vet. gg ez noob
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>>3987241
The child obviously take precedent. I'll try to save the dog too but the child takes priority.

This is like the world's shittiest trolley problem.
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My dog has gotten into chocolate numerous times and it's never been an issue. If chocolate was really dog crypronite, le doggo millenials would ban chocolate.
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Ambulance for child, drive dog to vet
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>my child
I'm infertile ever since a tragic motorcycle accident so the kid is probably some adopted african I got stuck with very recently because the crazy bitch I met in vegas lied and somehow got one behind my back. Dog's going to the vet.
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>>3987241
Child care is the mother's responsibility, so the wife takes the kid to the hospital.

A man does not exist to coddle his children, he exists to provide to them, so I take the dog to the vet.

That sure was hard lad
>inb4 wishy washy milennials go noooo you have to "BE THERE"
What, your dad never worked overtime during your birthday party?
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>>3987527
>What, your dad never worked overtime during your birthday party?
No, one of the perks of being a business owner was that he worked on his own schedule. Neither of my parents missed a single birthday of mine or my siblings. Sorry your parents were shit dude. Better luck next time.
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>>3987241
I save the kid while my girlfriend saves the dog.
Hydrogen peroxide IIRC.
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>>3987526
I ride motorcycle and I'm curious to what your incident was
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>>3987527
>What, your dad never worked overtime during your birthday party?
Ahh, insight into the damaged psyche of the dog fetishist.
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>>3987640
thats completely normal. birthday parties are for women. figures a cat fan would worry about muh parents on muh heckin birthdayerino.
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>>3987644
I'm a cat fan and I never even had birthdays. I had a bar mitzvah/ IMHO, birthdays are stupid, encourage wasting money, and waste everyone's time. Your dad absolutely should be at work during your "birthday" because it's just a regular day. Who the hell celebrates getting close to death anyways? It's nothing special like reaching physical maturity. "Oh wow the earth orbited the sun again" who cares
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>>3987527
My dad didn't work during my childhood because he wasn't fit to. Not everyone is the same bro.
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>>3987241
chocolate is not poisonous for dogs, they just can't digest it properly so it could end killing them within days, meanwhile rat poison can kill you in minutes.
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>>3987526
Jesus fuck, how did a motorcycle incident geld you?
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>>3987241
the dog will probably be fine, maybe shit himself but fine. take the baby.
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>>3987241
darn it, that sucks. guess i will be adopting a new child and dog.
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This is my priority:
My young kids > Parents > Spouse > Close companions (including pets) > Other family > friends > other people and animals> irredeemable criminals
If my pet has shown more empathy and loyalty than certain friends then they take priority. If anyone shows a change in personality and does something heinous they get less priority
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Ambulance for the dog take the child to the vet
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Save the kid
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>>3987647
Stop your kvetching you hooknosed abomination.
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>>3987241
bringing your kid to the hospital is going to bankrupt you, it's way simpler to just make a new one. sorry kiddo, you're on your own..
bringing the dog to the vet on the other hand makes much more financial sense than letting it die and having to buy a new one, especially if it was an expensive purebred
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>>3987241
My cousin ate an entire pound of DeCon when he was 3. Treatment consisted of Vitamin K and fluids. It's just an anticoagulant, and it kills by dehydration. Mice and rats die because they have a bodyweight measured in grams. Similarly it takes a mountain of normal chocolate to kill the average dog.

Both cases can be handled with a call to the poison control hotline, medical assistance is probably unnecessary.
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>>3987527
>What, your dad never worked overtime during your birthday party?
What kind of inconsiderate monster throws a child a birthday party on a weekday?

Birthday parties happen on the Saturday after your birthday, unless your birthday is on a Saturday or Sunday that year.
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Take both to the vet, as it's cheaper and the vet is used to dealing with dogs who eat rat poison.
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>>3987241
I would save literally any baby over my dog, who I love and have had for 6 years. Human lives are more important and little children are innocents who aren't culpable for the shit they get themselves into
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>>3987527
>What, your dad never worked overtime during your birthday party?
no because we would move my birthday party so that all the members of my family could be there
so my dad did overtime and still made it to my birthday party
sounds like your dad is a lazy shit
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>>3987527
This level of detachment from fathers is a modern phenomenon that is only happening due to the industrial revolution making a hyper specialized economy possible, where fathers work away from the home and become invisible to their family. The consequences of severing the child-father bond and placing kids solely in the hands of their mother/female caretakers are obvious to anyone paying attention. Ted will be vindicated.
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>>3987241
Take the dog to the vet, while my gf takes the child to the morgue.

Fuck those disgusting, manipulative, un-unique demons that grow into just another of the 8billion shitters that this hole doesn't need.
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>>3988941
honestly you'd be doing the kid a favor by cutting its life short
this planet is going to be almost uninhabitable in 30 years time
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>>3988945
I take both to the vet. Vets are usually trained for humans too
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>>3987246
>>3987248
>>3987323
>>3987520
>>3988254
>>3988247
>>3988906
>>3988912
>going into medical debt by bringing your child to the hospital
>doctors know anything about RAT poison

Its an ANIMAL poison, why the fuck would you go to the ER

>>3988920
This dude knows whats up
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>>3988906
This is true. And people ask why the white birthrate is so low.
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>>3989005
>>Both cases can be handled with a call to the poison control hotline, medical assistance is probably unnecessary.
>going into medical debt by bringing your child to the hospital
┬┐Por que?
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>>3989005
Poison control hotline.
It's free.
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Given that you're an Amerilard, it probably milk chocolate so your dog will be perfectly fine and not need a vet.
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>>3989005
You dont have to go into debt. Just use the money you saved by not paying for health insurance..
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>>3987241
Well, since the only child I'll ever have is made of vinyl, but the dog is a living, breathing thing, I'd take the dog to the vet.



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