is it normal for a 11 year old to shower with his father? this memory has come back up after years of never thinking about it once and all I remember is seeing his penis near my face. I have an autism level memory but i cant recall anything past this. did something happen or am I just freaking myself out. I constantly seek out relationships with men like him now as an adult and i'm afraid these two things may be related. someone please help me I feel like i'm on the verge of having a breakdown and cant get out of bed since I remembered this days ago
There aren't exactly polls detailing its prevalence.
>>25669533I'm asking if it's fucking normal at that age or if it's not. I don't give a shit about graphs, I live in america
It's pretty strange. I can see bathing together if the kid's like... 6 or younger to make sure they're doing everything right, but 11 is way too old.That doesn't guarantee abuse, of course. Maybe his parents came from a different culture or something and showered with him at that age?
>>25669605Definitely not normal by any means. Was this a one time event or did your father expose himself other times as well?
>>25669512what race are you? it's normal in some cultures.
>>25669619It only ever happened the one time>>25669621we're both white
>>25669512>>25669629It's not normal. Do you remember why it happened? Maybe it was for a trivial reason and no harm was intended. Either way it's past and there's nothing you can do about it, so I hope you don't let this affect you too much.
>>25669512Was he erect?
>>25669512It's not normal but I wouldn't worry much about it. The last time I recall doing it was around 7 yo. 10-12 years is the grey zone when you become sexually aware.
>>25669512i took a shower with my dad when i was 8, but only once. i also made my mom dry me off with a towel after i showered until i was 12 for reference.
Most people shower with a parent until they're like 8 at the most if they can't get the hang of it
>>25669512Nope and that's one of the reasons I ain't talked my dad in 20 years.Sorry OP. Try to remember it doesn't define you want that going away from biological family was normal and healthy until the last century or less.Sucky situation (pun intended) but don't let societal rules ruin your life. Walk away and live a life that starts with your own adult life. Let your parents be a scary myth for your own children.
>>25669512honestly it could be a fake memory
>>25669770his penis was very large, I dont know if it was erect or not it feels like my brain is blocking it out and it was definitely near my face>>25670117i hope it is so badly but after I had taken mushrooms a year ago I had a meltdown and started screaming daddy fucked me over and over in my apartment and held a box cutter to my neck until I calmed down. this cant be normal someone please tell me whats going on I feel like I am losing my mind and I cant take it
>>25669512>is it normal for a 11 year old to shower with his father?Not regularly.I had to share a shower with my dad and my brother when I was 12 and we were out camping, but that only happened once, and we still joke about it because of how weird it was.>>25670506Lay off the shrooms, retard.
>>25670520did your dad and brother put their penises near your fucking face? I dont like mushrooms and its not anything i'd ever do again but its shown to help uncover repressed memories
>>25670532One of them dropped the soap, and it was a cramped stall, so no, but I did get uncomfortably close with an ass.
Doesn't sound normal, but doesn't automatically mean abuse either.I don't want to speculate too much due to the possibility of creating false memories, but do you remember, were you at home? Was it possibly a public shower situation where there was either no stall separation, or maybe your dad wanted to keep you supervised?
>>25670541it was a cramped bath tub with a shower, I dont have any memory why we were in there together but we were just at home, I had showered by myself for years at that point
>>25670506Oh dear dude, I think you should see a therapist if you can. Either something did happen and you brought it to the surface, or you've gotten your brains scrambled from shrooms. In any case, I've heard people who go for their necks during suicidal episodes are the real serious cases, so take care of yourself man.
>>25669512Not normal today in the West, was normal in the past when there was limited warm water or water at all.If you have “daddy issues” you are among the 50% of women who just cannot accept that their father was just some dude.
>>25670556the idea had floated in my head a bit before the shrooms, I never thought much of it and thought it was completely normal but after the shrooms it made something click. I could still remember seeing his penis in front of my face and feeling uncomfortable but it felt dull, like I had ignored it for all those years and blocked it. but after the shrooms it was like a dam broke and everything came flooding. thank you for talking about this even somewhat seriously anons. I dont know what i'm going to do besides numb myself with movies and books until I see my therapist but this all feels like one giant nightmare that cant be real
>>25670568>this all feels like one giant nightmare that cant be realIf anything happened, it happened a long time ago. Bringing it to the surface may be disruptive, but it's also a step towards healing. So try not to see this as your life coming apart, but a new life beginning to come together.It's good to hear you've already got a therapist.
>>25669512It doesn't matter if it's normal. You're responsible for how you experience your own life. You can make whatever value judgment you will about your dad, but ultimately others' perspectives don't matter in how your own past influences you. Nobody will ever know your perspective or change how you see yourself.
I think wether or not you are male or female matters significantly here.
>>25669512Almost certainly innocent. The key would be the emotional content of your memories. Are they associated with fear or dread? If not, forget about it.
It's not that weird