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So, incels. How common are they exactly? I mean I see articles about it from time to time but I've never actually spoken to one outside of this site, but all over this site if I so much as mention having had sex at some point they come flying out furious becaue they never have, and I mean I just can't believe it's that widespread of a problem.

All through highschool I intended to wait until marriage, then into my twenties it felt weird I hadn't slept with anyone yet. I had sex, but only in long-term relationships. So thousands of times, but only with a total of four girls. Now I've been pretty depressed because I haven't had sex since 2018. Did a couple years in prison, haven't been able to connect with anyone in the year I've been out. Whenever I've tried to talk about my loneliness and isolation on here I'm immediately drowned in incels acting like it's first world problems, and how dare I miss what to me had always been normal.

It just seems hard to believe it could be that widespread because even my fat and ugly friends got laid, and I've always been incredibly socially awkward yet I never used to have a problem with it.
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>>25356184
As a real incel I hate how we are portrayed. It all started with elliot. I met him on the misc before he killed all those people and we knew that was coming...he was a fakecel but he helped spread awareness about what us incels go through. Most could get laid if they tried hard but some of us are too ugly and it really isnt our fault but the media loves to portray us as rapists and murderers.


youre just naive and stupid, incel or not the number of men that are virgins or struggling to get puss is increasing which will lead to the destruction of the west
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>>25356184
I'm pretty sure both of my friends are virgins. Also my brother but only because he's religious. He has had gfs
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>>25356184
That’s because people who are getting laid, etc. are less likely to come here and complain. Think about, this is 4chan. You can’t judge the general population by the people that post here.
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>>25356205
No. Incels are full of shit and Elliot embodies them. He couldn't get laid because he was a narcissistic/autistic/psychopathic individual and a victim of bullying. If a person has that much wrong with their brain it's easy to see why they wouldn't get laid, provided you're seeing reality clearly.
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>>25356184
Literal incels are rare, as almost no one is unfuckable. The people who call themselves incels are usually just men demoralized by the sexual marketplace, most becoming bitter and resentful as a result, but they probably could get laid if they lowered their standards, making them vocels with delusions of inferiority. True incels are extremely rare and are mostly those with severe physical and mental disabilities or injuries that destroy their physical attractiveness. Those who call themselves incels (despite being vocels) are more common, maybe 1 in 10 or 2 in 10 of males you’re likely to meet, so still rare.
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>>25356184
Best advice I could give to guys who "struggle" from experience is pick women who pick you. Don't "chase" someone who doesn't want you. I spent so much of my life exclusively after emotionally unavailable, aloof types that I've become jaded and feel like nobody will ever want me because my experience was painted by all that. Please don't make the same mistake I did.
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>>25356499
Also be careful of women who choose guys. If a woman is pretty but gets dumped all the time, there's your sign.
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>>25356499
Is that really love though, or just the male equivalent of "settling"?
Serious question
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>>25356519
If you're not settling in any department you must be a top male, female, otherkin. whatever. People are often not mentally fit for a relationship and people are often abusive and/or cheaters. That's why I suggest never compromising in the morals or functioning department unless you want a divorce.
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>>25356533
>>25356533
I think relationships are not for me. I'm just asking questions as an outsider. Anway the the whole thing is kind if making me sick to think about. It seems to not even be real love for most people. Just a kind of settling and friendship/familiarity
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>>25356560
It's really not that complicated. It should be someone you're mutually sexually attracted to who treats you well. Sometimes it's hard to find that especially with people becoming more isolated, so many people end up alone or with a person who is suboptimal, which I don't recommend. I don't agree with the population being treated like cattle who must reproduce. Seven to eight billion is more than enough people.
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>>25356589
That doesn't really sound like love to me
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>>25356499
>pick women who pick you
This is the most out of touch normie advice I've read on here since 2011, congratulations.
>>
I'm an incel and nobody will genuinely be able to tell. I think majority of incels are just guys who don't really do anything to be noticeable outside of dedicated websites like 4chan.
I have a good job, a close group of male friends and I faked just enough of my dating history that nobody suspects that I'm an incel.
>>
The common misconception is that it's all about sex. With us incels, it's what sex implies. That a person was attracted enough to you, wanted you, accepted you enough to do this intimate thing with you.
The problem with incels isn't penis in vagina, it's intimacy and feeling wanted and loved.
There are 'incels' who have had sex with hookers yet never attracted a girl anyway.
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>>25356655
A lot of incels come from shitty homes too, or had emotionally absent parents that either didn't care about their kids' romantic relationships or gave them bad or misleading advice.

One trend I notice is that a lot of incels come from homes where the parents are older. If the kid got advice about girls at all, it was either hippie Woodstock treat them as equals shit or shit like "just put on a nice suit, hold the door open and take her out to the soda shop son!" I mean there are a variety of reasons the parents could have contributed but it seems to be a big theme among many.

I for example, didn't even get braces done for me, so I have an ugly open-mouthed smile.
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>>25356604
It's not necessarily romantic. Romance still exists but it's not always between people who ought to be married. If it's any consolation, many people love their spouses and have better quality of life due to being married.
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>>25356671
>didn't care about their kids' romantic relationship
That would be me. But what if they did care? They can't make you get in one
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>>25356604
Love is fleeting, marriage is a business. Find a business partner who shares your values.
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>>25356685
You can love your spouse. It's pretty common.
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I'm an incel OP, ask away. I'm 29.
Fat and depressed on therapy and meds most of my life, spent a large part of my 20s as a shut-in, flunked college, no degree or job experience whatsoever. Obviously no romantic experience of any kind either, no female has ever even aknowledged my general existence.
I'm not particularly short.
I'm not particularly ugly, when I lose some weight.
No physical disabilities.
I'm extremely hygienic, obsessed with being clean and smelling nice and like my car and house clean.
But I'm convinced I'll die alone, probably rope the day I turn 30.
So there you have it. Some people just fall through the cracks and end up here.
There's nothing that can be done, it's just how life is.
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>>25356683
They can't and to be fair a lot of what makes an incel is genetic (autism, ugliness, other personality disorders) but parents can definitely make it worse or better depending on how they treat you. The Love-Shyness book basically goes into how many introverted males who are supported as kids end up having fairly normal lives (if not the sordid sexual histories of extroverted and attractive males) whereas ones that have adverse childhoods more or less are "It's over" by 26.
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>>25356682
Sounds like a matter of expediency rather than any real feeling. I saw this happen with my own family members too. What makes you so special anyway compared to the previous people she "loved"

I think it would be best if I just didn't get involved. Lol
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>>25356697
Personally I'm glad they leave me the fuck alone about it
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>>25356700
I wouldn't consider you used up if you loved someone else prior.
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>>25356707
Is it really love if it goes away though? Do you stop loving your family members and start hating them or not caring? That's what seems to happen in relationships
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>>25356706
My parents have never shown an interest but I do find it annoying that whenever I show any despair in not being able to find a partner (unless I really wanna scrape the bottom of the barrel and even then there's no guarantee) everyone seems to blow me off (at best) or accuse me of being bitter (at worst).

Like, I'm glad that literally everyone else has made peace with me never getting married but I sure haven't and I would like my feelings to be validated for once.
>>
You know, it's so soul-crushing.
Everyone gets girls. Everyone. It's not about looks, money, anything, people just want to get together. Except with me.
Imagine seeing this around you all your life and never figuring out wtf you're doing wrong.
Then you ask for advice and they tell you to get a shower.
Then you're googling nearby schools, colleges and malls and ordering a rifle in minecraft.
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>>25356716
>>25356716
>accuse me of being bitter
Luckily I don't have to worry about that because they're all bitter as well. In fact it's probably why they leave me alone about it. I don't bring up relationships under any circumstances

How do they blow you off?
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>>25356742
IMO it's just that they treat it like it doesn't actually matter. Like, "oh don't worry I didn't have a girlfriend until I was 31," or "relationships aren't that important." Generally just diminishing how I feel or 'subtly' implying that I have no right to feel the way I do. Like I'm just supposed to be happy being a mediocre wageslave in a collapsing country and culture with no one I can truly trust or share my life with and no kids to really give a shit about what the future will hold.
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>>25356715
Family are different because we don't chose them. True love and friendship never go away but the relationships can sour and end. At risk of sounding cliche and pseudo profound, sadness is the other side of the coin of happiness.
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>>25356752
Not that anon, but I know exactly what you mean.
I'm 27 and everytime I bring up my problems to my family they say 'it's inevitable that you'll find someone, everyone does'.
Normie logic at it's finest.
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>>25356752
>no one I can truly trust or share my life with
I firmly believe even most people in relationships don't have that.

>>25356763
>Family are different because we don't chose them
Why should it be any different though? I say family love is the real lasting love. Relationship "love" seems to mostly be a load of shit. It's purely attraction, not love
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>>25356184
Incels that self-identify as incels? Astronomically rare.

Incels by R*ddit/feminist definition (ie: as a synonym for any male virgin or any person that criticizes a woman at any point in their life for any reason)? A good 70-80% of men 35 or under have been called an "incel" at some point.
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>>25356764
IDK it's just my birth Dad only really had a family because his two wives were desperate, the first one because she was a lesbian who needed to fool her evangelical parents and the second one because she was genuinely an awful person who didn't deserve my Dad, but my Dad was autistic and bullied by his sisters (one of whom ended up being my adoptive mom who proceeded to bully me as a child as well) and had extremely low self-confidence. And he was even pretty good-looking for the time. A lot of people don't understand I have the same struggles as him but harder because even though if I lost weight I could be moderately good-looking, I can't compete with these guys who are 6'3", ripped af, and have 7 inch dicks.

I'm not good-looking enough for casual sex and long-term relationships, which is what I want anyways, are out of the question because most women, or most people for that matter, can only tolerate an autistic male for as long as he's able to pretend that he's normal.
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>>25356778
You seem to get it anon.
Self-improoooving is a meme, females have thousands of top-tier males at their disposal on tinder, insta etc, why put in the titanic effort just to be mediocre compared to others and never a first choice? It makes sense, what girl would choose the slightly decent looking autist over Chad Tundercock?
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>>25356815
Even then, let's say I did somehow manage to be Chad Thundercock? How could I NOT get drunk on my newfound power and start treating women as holes. I was never given unconditional parental love so I don't even understand what unconditional love is supposed to look like. For me, it would just be "I got ripped and learned how to play your social games that I find incredibly passe so that you would give me a second date, if I don't get access to your hole then I've wasted all my time."

I couldn't even love at this point if I wanted to.
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>>25356403
lmao im almost 30 and an incel, I made the same comment when I saw his videos for the first time. but most true incels are not like him and if you knew anything about us you would know that he is more of a meme and that we didnt really see him as an incel

now fuck off with your virtue signaling
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>>25356815
Self-improving is not a meme, self-improving *for the sake of women* is a meme (and cuck shit). Improve yourself for your sake.

I can't get over the fact that incels have at least some understanding of how shitty women are but they still want to serve one. Life with women is fucking miserable. Do you want to work two jobs to support someone that's not even emotionally supportive, always hiding how you think because you don't want to be "emotional and clingy", constantly worrying about when they're going to branch off to the next guy? Someone you can't even fucking relate to because you share no common interests or hobbies, and they can't have an intellectually stimulating conversation to save their lives? If you want casual sex hire a hooker, I promise you it's cheaper and they're not going to ask you to change everything about your life and personality to suit them. Women are parasitic.

Even an autistic male has a stronger capacity for independence than a woman. The moment you drop the myopic focus on women and sex is the moment you can live a better life.
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>>25356837
Then become that and do it if that's what you want to do.
Maybe I'm just projecting here, but I was under the assumption that most of us incels just want intimacy and a genuine connection.
Though I guess us older ones are probably too broken to ever be able to have this, even if we won the lottery and the opportunity presented itself.
>>25356849
I know for a fact not all women are like that. I may be an incel but that means I hate myself, not women.
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>>25356859
>25356859
Well it's not what I want to do, I mean I wouldn't say I've never been tempted but to me doing that seems like a cope more than anything.

Perhaps I am a bad person though, I mean I do at least partially blame autism for why I'm racist.
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>>25356184
It’s largely a media creation for use in divide and conquer games. You can’t make people fight each other if they’re not sure who they’re supposed to dislike, so fake groups get created to argue with other fake groups
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>>25356184
It was a collective of wayward young men, the type that always crops up in society in some form. No one cared until there were 2 specific shooting sprees by "incels," then he media decided they could use this to eliminate a threat to their power and so decided to start an anti-incel campaign and get the general public against them with yet another manufactured moral panic. That's really all there is to say about it.
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>>25356671
I'm two years from wizardry and I never got "the talk" or advices or anything.
One time when I was like 18 and just got drivers license and was driving my dad around on errands for practice he asked me
>are there any nice girls at school, you should try dating one
That's it. That's all I've got. But I dont blame them since there were bigger causes to my social retardation and such.
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I'm a 30 year old virgin. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. I don't like to identify with incels though, I'm just a loser virgin
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>>25356775
So what is an incel then? I feel like I would qualify by that definition which is pretty stupid.
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>>25356184
19 year old khhv incel here. I posted this shit here before.
I have a giant crush on a girl from my class. She is extremely cute, wears cute clothes, looks at least shy and is a good student. I'm obsessed with her, and can't stop thinking how cute she looks. She even has anime buttons on her bagpack.
But I never spoke to her. She is in my class for 5 months and I never spoke a single word to her.
And I know that speaking won't help, since I'm an absolute weird freak. And I'm also ugly and short. No chance.

Probably an undiagnosed aspie.
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>>25356205
You were on the misc too? I had just gotten back into fitness in those days so I was lurking there but never registered and posted. I was in those early ER threads though and wish I did. Maybe I could've gotten through to the little shithead if I actually talked to him, though I doubt it.
But no, he was not a "fakecel". He was the typical incel in fact....a really bad mix of social autism and entitled narcissism. If you want to say he was a fakecel because incel should be reserved only for those poor souls who are so ugly or deformed they really can't get laid at all, like another poster here implied, then fine. But if we go by that definition of incel, then 90% of you "incels" online are actually fakecels.

>>25356695
>I'm fat and have no degree or job experience
>there's nothing that can be done!
Yeah nothing at all...except, you know, if you tried to lose weight and get a job or even go back to school. Posts like these are why people have a low patience dealing with incels.
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>>25356184
>>25356470
>making them vocels
It varies bc its still a coloqual term and itll have a lot different meaning depending on who you ask. The thing is that it often isnt just about not having sex, if that was the case theyd just get a prostitute. They are in a situation where they cant get gf or laid by wooing a girl. There could be some disabilty or disfugrement, they could be far down the social hierarchy and sometimes its their own fault. I think a lot of them dont see it as "going thru a dry spell" or "being bad at pickup". I think they only see themselves as incels once they feel like theyve no hope of forming a romantic mutual relationship
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>>25357805
>I think they only see themselves as incels once they feel like theyve no hope of forming a romantic mutual relationship
Not really, the problem is most of them see themselves as incels the minute they get 1 or 2 rejections and just stop trying ever again. In ER's case he never even tried at all and never advanced to the stage where he could get rejected; he expected to just sit on park benches with his vanilla latte and have women randomly come up to HIM and ask HIM out.
This never trying is also why we see incels declare "it's over" at the ripe old age of 18 or 20 or 23 or whatever and the creepy fixation on "teen love". Guys that are in their late 20's and beyond might have a serious problem, but not these kids.
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OP is a lying retard. he himself is incel as he states hes sexless since 2018
males without a gf are almost all incels
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>>25356184
I know several incels irl. Just to clarify: I'm not one. I'm on the shy/insecure side but a pretty normal, actually good looking dude. So empirically speaking, they're fairly common.
Not Elliot style though, but regular incels.
One of them was always pretty misogynistic. He's also pretty bad looking and insecure as hell. Doesn't want to change though. I suppose that's just who he is. I cut contact with him because he's actually toxic.
Another one is just a regular but sensitive and insecure guy. I feel bad for him because he's one of my best friends and I try to give him advice but he just falls in love too quick, is too polite/socially awkward etc.. To add to that, he literally has zero experience with women in his mid 20s. He either tells them outright that he's in love and wants to fuck them or he apologizes in great lengths for something he didn't even need to. He's not bad looking at all though.
I also know two others, but they're more like dudes who can't get laid because of personal issues than actual incels.
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>>25357844
i know guys who are shy and good looking and still are incels,
incel means gets no sex. i bet you dont get sex either, incel
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>>25357827
Yeah, thats probably a big part of it as well. But not all of that is intuitive and is often formed by their surroundings. Its often partially their own fault but society isnt blameless either
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>>25357850
I'm currently on the verge of entering a relationship or at least some fwb thing.
I've had a 5 year relationship and I sometimes get hit on by girls.
Does that sound like an incel to you, you bitter fuck?
I'm actually a Chad when I'm drunk as fuck
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>>25356184
I'd be considered an incel and I'm neither unattractive or unable to get sex. I'm a virgin and since I place harsh judgment on women for their actions and push for accountability I'm considered le evil incel. Nobody gets called an incel for being a virgin simp. Incel is just a blanket term to shame anyone who does enable female behavior that was considered unacceptable before modern times.
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>>25357898
This is weapons-grade cope.
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>>25357878
yes it does, cope incel, you had a gf once boohooo
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>>25356184
What women value in a partner is good looks and high social status. This is universal across all types of women. Is it really a surprise that ugly and socially awkward men would end up virgins?
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>>25357997
Ding ding ding. It's not even rocket science
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>>25357968
You're a virgin, aren't you?
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>>25357840
>>25357850
>>25357968
These are all the same person and he's a whiny obnoxious fag. And he wonders why he's an incel.
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>hasn't had sex in 3 years and hasnt met an incel
Look in a mirror, if you go longer than 6 months without sex you're an incel, that fact has been agreed upon many times on this board. If you go a year without sex you're basically a virgin again.
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>>25358029
It's always incels in denial that are obsessed with shitting on incels on the internet
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>>25358015
nope, but someone writing nah im not incel, incels are so rare is the biggest cope ive ever seen and my incel radar starts beeping and alarming.
unless you live in a south american shithole, about 70% of guys are incels in white countries unironically.
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>>25358029
>>25358038
this is both true
>>
Someone recovers from a disease in his late 20s and needs to restart his life, girls, friends, etc.

Where does he go? Most "incels" are people who fell off the wagon and need to rebuild themselves.
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>>25358041
Incels aren't as common as the internet leads on, unless you think it's any guy who isn't fucking a new girl every week. The average guy will sleep with a handful of different women in his entire life, statistically, but nobody calls them incels.
There is an entire ocean between pussy slayer and literal khv basement dweller but this boards inhabitants, crabs in a bucket that they are, really can't accept that not nearly every man is a completely sexless loser. And I say this all as a virgin myself.
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>>25358092
>And I say this all as a virgin myself.
cope more incel
>>
Is it still an incel if you're a KHV, but have also never even tried to pursue romance? I often have days where I want to be in a relationship with all the benefits it seemingly brings, but I'm also focused on financial stability and getting myself to a place where I feel secure before I even try to find someone who shares my values. I work in an office filled with failed marriages and teen parents who regret getting into things so early, the sort who wear tracksuits when out of the office and watch football at the pub every weekend. They seem to think I look attractive enough and would do okay on the pull, but they also respect my slow approach to these things. For all the degenerate shit I've jerked off to over the years, I have a strange desire to have my hair cut and washed by someone I love and trust. I'm never comfortable getting my hair cut at barbers, I feel like I'm on an execution chair.
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>>25358101
The only cope is insisting everyone must be a sexless loser just because you are, incel.
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>>25358113
yes, being a coward with no balls is no excuse for being not an incel
look at all these virgin incels and 1 time gf havers coping like they arent incels lol
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>>25358136
he literally is sexless tho he stated that hes a virgin nigga. i jsut say the truth most guys are incels, sure you can cope all you want and call yourself not incel but it doesnt change truth.
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>>25357772
Biggest loser here
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>>25358148
I didn't say I'm not an incel; I said it's coping to act like most guys are. Unironically go the fuck outside and talk to people, the vast majority of guys have seen and touched a pussy at least once and many have done so in the context of a long term, fulfilling relationship.
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>>25357772
Do I have any chance? Or should I go the wizard route? I have problems with my daily life anyway. If you're so socially retarded and weird that you have problems doing normal conversations you can't get a gf. Everyone always gives me that look.
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>the worst she can say is no
This is so untrue in the modern world that I implore everyone here never to "try their luck" with any woman.
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>>25358092
I actually believe it's the opposite, everyone out there is having sex, looks, wealth all that don't matter.
Everyone except me, because I'm interior to others and missed out on the proper age to experience these things for the first time.
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>>25358390
I'm not getting laid either. Have gotten close and arguably had chances but I was too much of a "beta" to seal the deal. Every day I feel like I slip further into isolation; this time last year I actually had people to talk to and spend time with. Now, I don't even have that.
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>>25358251
its not coping im a seasoned player and ive analysed the game a lot. most guys dont get laid, unless once in sun darkness getting a gf for every 10 years
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>>25358412
Objectively Im not particularly ugly or short.
Yet in my 30 years in this world no female had ever shown the slightest hint of aknowlwgding my existence.
At least you had chances.
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>>25358427
Thats impossible anon, you probably had girls looking at you and you are too autistic to notice.
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>>25358458
i told you guys 70% of men are incels in white countries and that is easily the case if not more. youre totally coping with not being incels
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>>25358458
Nta but it's the same on my end. Girls barely acknowledge me in college or anywhere else. They're all either in their own personal cliques already or know each other or are just using their phones. I don't think I am unattractive but who knows. It's not like I don't take glances or atleast try to make myself noticable, people just don't give a shit. Maybe they can see through my veneer since I don't really enjoy being around people. Maybe they think I am a weirdo because I sit more often alone and don't have any friends.
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>>25356184
As common as you apply the term. Incels exist in your mind, that is as a coefficient function of your inner Karen.
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>>25358595
Cont.
As to why I don't have friends I guess it's because I'm just incompatible with the people around me. I don't care about the fucking soccer game or the fucking marvel movie or the fact that you feel proud of yourself for doing something cultured for once and going to an opera. I can barely even tolerate the other periphary loners, I don't want to hang out with a person whose breath smells like death. Or someone who gets impressed because I say some banal historical trivia even though I subconsciously say it to impress people. I don't care about your opinions on how socialists are wrong when value-speaking you guys practically want the same utilitarian outcomes. I don't like going to clubs or drinking nights or parties so that I can listen to you shriek as you pop open a champagne bottle and fling it around like a retard as if it's the most accomplished thing you've ever done. I feel truly and utterly alone, as if where I go I am not really there
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>>25356184
Roastie:
>Like I just feel like guys who haven't like had at least 1 girlfriend in high school, like there must be something wrong with them, like they're a weirdo
Incel:
>May I ask you, how many guys have you slept with?
Roastie:
>What?
Incel:
>How many guys have you had sex with?
Roastie:
>expression goes blank
Incel:
>How about how many times have you had sex?
Roastie:
>Like I don't see how any of this is relevant like
Incel:
>You just insulted me for being a virgin. You called me a weirdo. In fact these days only guys get shamed for being virgins.
Roastie:
>Like what does my sex life have like anything to do with like anything
Incel:
>So it's ok to insult a guy because he's a virgin but its a crime if you ask a girl how many guys she's slept with
Roastie:
>visibly gets irritated
Incel:
>Well how many? 1, 2, 5, 7, 10, 15, 20, 30
Roastie:
>feigns innocence
>Look you're like really being offensive right now like
Incel:
>31, 32, 33, 35, 50
Roastie:
>she looks pretty pissed at this point
Incel:
>51, 52, 53, 60, 70, 80, 100
Roastie:
>now she's mad
Incel:
>smirks knowing he caught the Roastie in a trap
Roastie:
>Yeah I've had lots of sex. So what?! At least I'm not an ugly loser like you.
Incel:
>I bet you've said that to a lot of guys that weren't good enough for you.
Roastie:
>starts clapping hands and stuttering a response
Incel:
>Face it society has no problem shitting all over men but its the end of the world when you criticize a girl
Roastie:
>Fuck this, fuck you
>walks off set
>>
What do you do when you're an incel loser in his 30s? Suicide?
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>>25356184
The actual reported number for 20-30 yo is around 30% since 2015(?).
I suspect it's much, much higher if you use incel's definition that hookers/escorts/protitutes and non-penetrative sex don't count. Probably around >60% in western countries, eastern Europe, Japan, and Russia
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>>25358915
that guy isnt an incel but LOL women are legit retarded, they suck at debating because they constantly use their emotions instead of their logic.
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>>25356519
"settling" is a vapid concept made by white women who need an excuse to leave their husbands/boyfriends to find "the one" which we all know doesn't exist.

incels don't need "the one", they need ANYONE. the reason you're an incel is because you're acting like those stuck up women. if you really wanted sex, you'd buy a hooker, but you don't want sex, you want a girlfriend. but a girlfriend won't make your self-esteem any better. a girlfriend won't fix your insecurity.

anyway, if you have a girl, love her. make her happy and she'll make you happy. don't fucking worry if you're "settling"or not, it's better than dying alone like all the people who never settled.
>>
To be honest I'll admit it's mostly just a genetic thing. I have a very low stress tolerance. I cannot be assed to spend my time trying to become Patrick Bateman. The routines, the workouts, the job, knowing what to say, pretending I believe things I don't believe and keeping up on trends is way too much for me. I find it difficult just to keep my room clean and hold down a job. And to be fair I'm really not attracted to any woman who wants me to be all those things before she views me as "worthy" of her, and that's like 99% of women so...
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>>25356184
I think a lot of dudes that have had sex actually have an incel mindset when it comes to sex, just not as extreme. Being an incel is like a very extreme version of being insecure, sexist, and entitled, but its absolutely possible to have toned down versions of incel beliefs (women today are all whores, having a high body count is bad, even more traditional views on sex before marriage are rooted in some kind of sexism) but still be able to fuck someone.
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>>25356184
>>25356403
A true incel is someone who can't be helped. It's a little bit of a unicorn term, but Elliot was not that. Would you consider a mentally deranged person an incel? I think inceldom deserves some kind of empathy. Being a psychopath does not, although it still does to a certain extent; however not finding a partner is the last thing a person like that should worry about.
Media is all about women and relationships with women, so making that the centerpoint of a problematic human being is a tremendous cashgrab for modern media.

All in all, when I hear incel, I don't imagine the average 4chan ragetard, but someone who is genuinely a good human being (ugly or not) but has lost their way or have never developed one, to the point they could have everything but a woman. If you don't have a hobby, a job, motivatino, nor discipline, then no wonder a woman does not want to hang out with you. You have the problem right in front of you, but decide to shift the blame somewhere else, because obviously it's hard to take responsibility for anything.
Once you have some form of success, let's say in your job, have activities to be proud of, other things that fulfill you, but a woman still doesn't show up, then there is something wrong and a solution should be sought for.
If you refuse to help yourself, and as a result reject any helping advice, you're only deliberately staying celibate to pity yourself, which as a result makes you no incel.

This will might make many seethe, but people who got their act together and saw results will agree with me.


But to respond to OP, with this mindset, "true" incels are a rarity. Most people who describe themselves as such usually have other problems that make them uninteresting to women, and they're a lot deeper than appearance, and these only persist because they avoid taking action. It's a very deeply rooted mentality, which is why it goes above the heads of such people.

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>>25359502
>women today are all whores
>having a high body count is bad
These two beliefs are more telling of you than anything. If having a high body count isn't bad then yes women are all whores.
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>>25359509
I have a fulfilling full time job and a hobby I love but haven't even been on a date in two years, though I admit that with COVID last year and after a bad relationship ending I decided to take a break. But now I feel like "everyone" is coupling up when I go on fb and see many old classmates and such with their new girlfriends and wives. I on one hand think I just need to be patient but on the other hand I feel this sense of dread. I don't visit 4chan that much any more and it's a good thing, because these exact threads stir up these old feelings of mine that I'll never be worth it. Despite all the effort I've put into my own career and passions, sometimes it just feels like as a man if I can't get laid, I'm not worth anything. I know it's really stupid to feel this way, but still.
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>>25359605
>sometimes it just feels like as a man if I can't get laid, I'm not worth anything. I know it's really stupid to feel this way, but still.
It's not stupid. It's literally how society was structurted. Also job and and hobbies actually have nothing to do with you getting laid or someone desiring you. The only personal work you need to be doing is going to the gym 6 times a week and doing steroids.
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>>25359502
Incel mindset is not a thing. Now we are just creating absurd boogeymen. Truth is, incels are right about some things but they frame it in such a cynical and defeatist way. Yes your looks, income and social status matter. That doesn't stop guys who aren't tall millionaire athletes and CEOs from getting laid. But I feel like the public has this absurdly strong reaction whenever a man or group of men criticizes women as a group for anything ever. It's fine to go on Twitter and bitch about toxic masculinity but the second you say "man, I see so many women with issues and it's kind of off-putting" you're an incel? Nah, shitty people exist everywhere. Men and women both, in great numbers.
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>>25359605
It's almost like these facebook stories are provoking you. Don't forget that facebook and any sort of social media makes people only show their best side. People that seem to travel the world and post pictures of that actually have a set of pictures ready to post every week just to make it look like they're on the move, but in reality it's say 20 pictures from a location thath they've visited for one day, being posted over the span of 6 months. The same applies to dating. It looks happy, but dating is a dreadful experience that drags people down if they are not comitting to it fully, and believe me the majority does not know how to handle a relationship properly. Everyone is socially inexperienced until the age of 30 or even older. The internet sets very unrealistic expectations from people to the point that aggreable people get affected the most.
It's good that you are working on yourself instead of trying to overwork yourself with dating. You fulfilling yourself brings true joy to life. And with that joy comes confidence, which will lead you to emanating that and attracting partners. In other words >>25359613 's advice is cynical and not true unless you want to attract vapid, toxic people, which you should avoid in the first place.
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>>25359641
All humans are vapid and toxic, the only ones that claim they aren't the ugly weak losers who spin yarns about inner beauty and other fake things to cope with being a loser.
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>>25359628
To add: whatever you think is entitled or shitty is something women do as well, just differently, because nobody is perfect. I've known a lot of women who cheat, lie, gaslight and emotionally and physically abuse men. And some who have just awful views on men and dating, who think they don't have to put in serious effort to find someone. Nobody talks about them being entitled though, it's only "entitlement" when sexually frustrated men do it. And pretty much no woman is ever truly sexually frustrated the way some men are.
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>>25359644
I'd assume you're >>25359613
What do you gain from describing all people so negatively? Doesn't that make you toxic and vapid as well, since you're human too? Or maybe that is exactly you and you just try to cope with that fact by saying everybody is like that? I am not insulting you, but you're proving that by making a toxic post in the first place.

You'd be happier if you didn't preoccupy yourself with how much you dislike other people and focus on yourself instead. If this is the only reason why you come on /adv/ you're doing yourself a great disservice. I personally come here because I want to help people like OP and >>25359605 because I've been in the exact same pickle, and maybe perhaps you're in the same situation. Believe it or not, listening to knowledgable /adv/friends actually helped me out of my problem
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>>25359641
>>25359641
I honestly hope you're right here because so often the refrain is: if you haven't done your first backshot at 17 and had multiple gfs by 25, it's over and you can never recover. I used to point out that I've had dates and kissed multiple women just never had sex for different reasons, to add nuance, but apparently that is "coping" now. The negativity really is draining after so long, it's tiresome. No reason to really think I couldn't find a gf now or some time down the road even though I've hit a dry spell. I'd feel different if I didn't have women actively hit on me irl and on apps in the past.
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>>25359700
I tried to do the all nice human bullshit and guess what happens when you do that? You get taken advantage of and end up a loser and all the other losers who talked about how great being a loser is suddenly hate you for being more of a loser than they are. So I started being as toxic as possible to gain back my social status and now everyone loves me.

People only care about themselves, and only care about others for what they can do for them.
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>>25356184
They are rare honesty. I've seen men who would literally be considered subhuman (obese, balding, short etc...) who have girlfriends.
Actually one Case I should mention is that pedo guy that Kyle killed. He's a convicted child molester, bald and 5'3" also most likely no education or good salary and he still had a girlfriend.
I don't think I've ever met an incel in my life. The turkish 5'2" overweight dude in my class has a beautiful gf ffs.
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>>25359709
I've thought the same in my teens. I lost my virginity at the age of 23 after getting my shit together socially. Luckily, I was putting in effort in other aspects of my life, which means I already had something to present when I went out dating. That's why I said it's good that you focus on yourself. You're sculpting yourself for people to assess who you are when they meet you.
However I can say that playing the dating game for a short while really drained my energy. I hated it honestly. People, both men and women, don't know what they are doing in their 20s, so why would their relationships be of any value? The good relationships that you see are either bad ones masked by social media or very very rare occurences. I like to say that life for a man starts in his 30s. That doesn't mean you shouldn't put in any effort in yourself beforehand - you want good momentum as you start your adult life (21 is not adult, at least not mentally). Besides, women don't hit on men if they have some sense of dignity to them. Nature intended it this way, and you are supposed to show your interest in a mature way while also presenting your worth. What many people do wrong is just show interest, which makes women automatically categorize them as orbiters. I don't want to get into the little details because that just tries to simplify something that is more complex, and toxic people like to cherrypick these to prove their point of why they don't have a partner.
>>25359724
You're supposed to be likeable, not a push-over. If you're going to behave like a piece of shit to others, you will be friends with other people that think behaving like a piece of shit is the way to go. Sure, if that makes you happy, but I'm certain internally it doesn't. If you're toxic and filled with anger that only shows your weakness, because every single situation makes you show your teeth, as if you have something to lose. You sound like me when I was in my teens. Dont overthink what others think of u
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>>25356184
its hard to say, most incels stay indoors and there isn't exactly a consensus, but i'll go to an extreme and say incels, real incels and not fakecel sociopath's / narcists as >>25356205 said, ballparking, i'd say 5% US of the population are incels. And i get this number from personal experience as well as 4chan statistics. I figured that at least half of 4chan users aren't incels, but the sum is made up for via people who don't visit 4chan and go to wizardchan or other forms, or its a sumpliment for people who browse other websites besites 4chan

>>25356205
this is post is really insightful, that said, i was a socially retarded / attractive fakecel and i always felt alienated from the incel community because of and really the incel community never really took me in or empathized with me and consitantly called me fake and shunned me. I don't at all want to belittle the incel community, but my realistic personal experience iv always had, iv always felt like a social reject among incels for being "attractive" yet socially retarded. Incelism has a lot of "rules"that are fucking stupid, but that said, those rules aren't at all on par with elliot roger
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>>25360037
fuck grammar mistakes, that's all.
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>>25359788
I'm hot and get a lot of chicks and make a lot of money. People like you end up poor with ugly wives who are run through by guys like me.
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>>25360075
Sure thing, Bateman.
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>>25359788
I think theres just a general lack of love in relationships.
Maybe love and romance is viewed as outdated or something, but if you are in love with someone you don't really care about what they can offer you but you making them feel happy makes you feel happy. It's an almost purely selfless feeling. I think incelism tends to view the whole world in a soulless materialist way which I cannot get behind.
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>>25356184
>All these NPC retards coping with no data
The answer is unironically +30% in both the US and UK
https://news.iu.edu/stories/2020/06/iub/releases/15-sexual-inactivity-young-men-united-states-no-sex-debby-herbenick.html
https://twitter.com/telegraph/status/1387795535415943172
>>
I think that it is dumb to think you are in control of your own happiness, like what many feminists seem to think when it comes to incels. The only way to be happy when you are actually sad is to pretend. To try and delude yourself into thinking that you don't actually want that thing or that it doesn't really bother you. But the truly conscious man will always know that he is simply deluding himself.
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>>25356470
1/10 is not rare anon...
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>>25357772
Have you tried not being ugly?

Gl anon. Fuck sex workers for now
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>>25358915
Jesus. Imagine taking the time to type all this.

3/10 got me to reply.
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>>25356184
>So, incels. How common are they exactly?
Somewhere between 1 in 50 and 1 in 3 males fit the stereotype of "idiot with low self esteem who blames his sex life, and can't get laid".
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>>25359502
>>25356184

I'm 32, a millionaire, work full time, and I'm /fit/. Might seem alien to you since most of you are virgins but a guy in my tier has standards. Mine aren't even that high. I just want a girl who is thin, has a low amount of sexual partners, no tattoos, and has straight hair with bangs.

Believe it or not, this criteria is pretty hard to find. I decided to try dating a fat chick who met everything other than the fact that she is fat. Currently dating her. She's 5'5" and ~190 lbs. I let her get a taste of my lifestyle, she's been to my home, I've treated her to amazing places, she never pays for a thing anytime we hang out. She's also head over heels in love with me.

I have told her that I will break up with her if she doesn't lose weight and all she does is make excuses about how she can't lose weight. She cried hysterically when I told her that. She has no job currently, infinite free time, her parents pay for her rent.

I on the other hand, have spent my entire life sculpting my body and building wealth so that my potential partner and my eventual children could have an easy stress free life. I can't even get a girl to do something that is good for her. Losing weight benefits her more than it benefits me. The dating pool for men is just awful. Women are trash and do not take care of themselves. The majority are overweight at a minimum. I honestly thought I could just chance on a fat girl who otherwise was a perfect match for me and get her to lose weight, but girls don't even want to do that. I'm insulted even this chick thought she could just be with me without having to do any work at all on herself.

rant is over
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>>25363334
i think it isnt impossible but the lardasses dont know how. you need to give them an instruction plan, bc just lifting weights probably wont work for them in losing their fat
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>>25356184
The sentiment of sexually and often socially unsuccessful men becoming bitter and jaded is common and known all over the world. It gets worse the more globalised and open a society is since in some rural village in mongolia even the town retard may end up with the prostitute simply because you don´t have the mobility to move somewhere else and theres noone else around, together with not knowing about half of this shit and being more down to earth due to not having access to the internet.
Options are only good for the people who can choose. The really attractive people don´t have these issues anyway but it seems like ironically, the more online and connected society becomes, the more average people have the same issues only the bottom of the barrel had in previous generations where they couldn´t even find someone to settle/only someone that repulsed them enough they´d rather stay single.
Theres too much meeting people from Tinder 40 miles away and not enough getting wasted with your neighbours and hooking up with the baker from across the street today. And too much driving too some event half the country away with not enough family gatherings and close knit social structures.
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>>25363334
Please consider investing in custom made sex robots (via 3d printing) with artificial wombs. We already from human eggs with just stem cells, so that's not an issue.
You'll might become one of the first trillionaires in history if you sold them globally.
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>>25356683
>>25356671
this is me. my dad died when i was 4 and i was raised mormon by my worthless cunt of a fucking 'mom' who did EVERYTHING she could to make sure i wasnt socializing outside of the church. including blatantly ignoring very obvious social and developmental issues.
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>>25358484
Where did you get that statistic?
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>>25357804
I lost 20kg last few months, was on my way to stop being fat, also been hitting the gym hard regardless, but recently it hit me none of that matters since I'm gonna be 30 soon and I'm roping anyway.
I wish 'going back to school' was that simple, I'd have to move back with my mom in order to afford college without debt (I'm extremely anti-debt) and the free college is impossible to get into at my age.
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>>25363334
>I on the other hand, have spent my entire life sculpting my body and building wealth so that my potential partner and my eventual children could have an easy stress free life. I can't even get a girl to do something that is good for her.
its not so much a girl thing more a human thing. there's a lot of guys out there that let themselves go / turn boring af once they get settled in with a girl after tricking her with a fake persona. but then again that fat girl you dated already had bad signs, she's overweight for a reason, lack of physical activity / mental fortitude.

but the thing is (implying what you said is true, i'm 50/50 for real or fake, doesn't matter tho) if all you want is for a girl who's thin, really you're not basing much on personality. a woman with a good personality / attitude that mends with yours is so important and fundamental in a relationship that most people on the planet neglect.

>The dating pool for men is just awful. Women are trash and do not take care of themselves.
its the same for women too. you seem to not be developed mentally and are sort of stuck in an unrealistic bubble / neglect reality. idc if you have money and fit, there's a lot of retarded celebrities' that are on par with that. but now a days a lot of women don't actually care about money, the era where "my bf has a pool" is kind of over with women independence and all the quality women are opting for someone that mends with them personally vs financial security / physcial looks, which has both pros and cons.
- late bloomer that's charismatic, i do better then my loaded bosses or fit guys. although i am fit myself

If you want, i can tell you a way to find legitimate women. although it takes time and you have to filter through.
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>>25364233
also forgot to add, telling a girl to lose weight is thee most retarded way you could go about it. best thing to do is simply remove all bad food from your house, maybe get her an active job, travel and encourage her to go with you, make he feel happy and active (with anything really) so she isn't bored and her depression or personal problems don't sink into her head making her want to eat. or fuck, maybe you can get her adderrell? shouldn't be hard if you're loaded.

that said, this doesn't work on everyone, only certain people, you need to get better reading people
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>>25363599
Forget the school then, let's focus on the weight.
Ok, so there IS something you could do and not only that you were actually doing it. But, you've still arbitrarily decided to give up anyway even though it was ACTUALLY WORKING.
You have a real loser's mentality, which is what brought this all on you to begin with. Like I said, this is exactly why I have a really low threshold of patience for incels.
>>
I think incel is a term with too much baggage and stereotypes and just not worth using anymore. We need a better name.
I have a group of friends in 25-30 age range:
>we all work
>we all live with parents
>we all do not have any sex or relationship with a woman in our life
>everyone excepts me works out and is fit
>everyone except me is at least average looking with no obvious autism symptoms or mental issues
>only the most attractive friend got laid (one night stands) in last five years but even he gets nothing anymore
>nobody dares to bring up this common problem of ours, we just do not talk about it
The thing is, I do not see how can this ever change. Nobody has any idea how to start and hold down a successful relationship. We are stuck.
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>>25364303
Have any of you actually tried though? Even your one-night stand having friend, did he actually ever try to connect with any of these girls beyond that? Even get promoted to "2-night stand"?
I had a bunch of friends like that too when I was that age. They were normal looking guys, didn't seem like huge nerds or losers or anything, but even so they never actually did much, never tried, etc. They just kind of existed. The most talking to girls most of them ever did was when we'd all go to the bar on Sunday for football and they'd simp for the bartenders (and those poor girls were a captive audience mind you).
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>>25364263
How does one get rid of such a mentality?
And I haven't given up on losing weight yet, also still go to them because it's fun, but I don't see the point in self-improving anymore since I fell into deep blackpill recently.
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>>25356470
>just lower your standards, bro
I never got this. Another thing normies say is "just improve yourself" so why do we spend our time improving and working just to have a chance at a girl who looks the way she does because she refused to put in the effort?
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>>25364905
>How does one get rid of such a mentality?
You simply choose not to have it, that's how. No one can do it for you.
> but I don't see the point in self-improving anymore since I fell into deep blackpill recently.
And why did that happen though?
Oh right, because you'd rather hang out on 4chan listening to a bunch of other losers who'd all rather enable each other to say it's hopeless and feel sorry for yourselves instead of pushing each other to be better.
Imagine if you're in a ship that sinks. Do you start swimming for that land you see on the horizon? Or say fuck it and just let yourself drown right there? A lot of incels have memed themselves into taking the second option.
>>
i suspect that from your own point of view, you have 'friends', and even your fat and ugly 'friends' have 'friends'
keyword: friends
incels are so numerous yet found so little in nature is because they are recluses and have few, if any, friends. If you know how to make a friend, you've figured out 60-70% of the formula for getting to sex, really. If you've never really made friends, then not only are you not understanding that 60-70% of the puzzle, but the other 40-30% as well. You're shit out of luck.
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>>25364952
More and more and more young women look like that every day, and the few that don't are fucking Chad. The women like in your image are also fucking Chad.

Why can't women just not be fat? That's not a rhetorical question. It's because young women who were born since 1990 have never faced any pressure not to be fat.
>>
I should stay away from this board, all this blackpill is driving me insane and making me suicidal, but I just can't.
There's a part of me that hopes this is all bullshit, that if I try I'll get results, that people and the world aren't as dystopian as people here would have me believe, but that part is buried deep down.
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>>25356184
Part of the trend is just a character assassination. Über-subs need others to reach out to them, so their rivals put it around that they know them, and they don't want to be approached, so nobody, "wastes their time." Maybe that's the crux of the anger: guy's bleeding out for love and his buddy whispers around on him so the people who approach him, to try to reach out, never try.
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>>25356470
This, I am in my 30s, a functioning member of society and work in a 'normal' professional career (non-STEM), and I've never been in a relationship and haven't had sex since 2010. I wouldn't call myself an incel but I'd rather not have sex than have sex with the type of women that I could realistically pull at this point.

I'm the only single person I know, so I think this type of situation is probably somewhat class-related.
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I offer a lot it just doesn't matter because I have an unsexy addiction instead of one that makes me hot.
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>>25363353
Nta but I will offer one thing. I've always been a bit skinny before gaining mass but from what I know it's mainly in your diet. My friend used to be chubby until he would go weeks on a bare minimun substenance diet. It isn't healthy probably but it made him thin.
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>>25356184
I walk among you and you never know



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