[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vm / vmg / vr / vrpg / vst / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Search] [Mobile] [Home]
Board
Settings Mobile Home
/adv/ - Advice

[Advertise on 4chan]


Thread archived.
You cannot reply anymore.


[Advertise on 4chan]


File: coomer.jpg (92 KB, 1545x869)
92 KB
92 KB JPG
I haven't had sex with my girlfriend in 6 months. We've done oral, but she says penetration "hurts"
How do I combat the urge to cheat? I have a friend I can dial at any time and have sex with her whenever I want and it's been really hard not to do it
>>
>I haven't had sex with my girlfriend in 6 months
>how do I combat the urge to cheat
Either she's a mentally ill christcuck or she's been cheating on you for at least 5 months, dump her.
>>
If the "hurt" thingie is new, tell her to go see her gyn. Good chance she has an infection down there.
>>
>>23146062
You fucking retard, "sex hurts" is the most common fucking lie a woman says when she doesn't want to fuck anymore but she also wants you to keep being her simp cuckboy.
>>
>>23146062
It always hurt her. We haven't been able to do penetration until I finish once.
>>
Guise is there such a thing as acute sexual starvation? I haven't had regular interactions with females outside of my direct social circle (sexual marketplace is fucked) in over two years sometimes I feel like I'm going to explode I swear I just want some healthy non-regressive sexual release
>>
There is such a thing as the pussy being too tight anon. She might have vaginismus.

I was once with an asian woman who was too tight for me. I knew she wasn't lying because i couldn't get more than one finger in. She was small framed and very petite. 45 years old. Previously married. So it can happen at Any age or experience level.
>>
>>23146022
Unless there is something medically wrong with her - and she should be checked our - the only reason for penetration to hurt is lousy foreplay on your part. There is no such thing as a too-small vagina - they push babies through those things, remember - but there IS such a thing as an insufficiently aroused and under-lubricated vagina.
>>
>>23146022
>she says penetration "hurts"
She's not attracted to you. End it.
>>
>>23146349
Tho there is such a thing as a girl who is so neurotically subconsciously anxious around sex that she clamps up

Which still could be alleviated by a guy who could calm her fears
>>
>>23146089
Wtf is wrong with you. Is her head that good?
>>
>>23146089
this sounds like a legit problem
she should go see a gyno or a doctor about this, perhaps she's too tightened up or something and you need to get her to relax more? or not, i actually think its probably a medical issue, tell her to go to a professional to look into what it is

dont ignore it
>>
>>23146022
All these dumb retards posting don't know about vaginismus.
>>
>>23146022
I hope she leaves you soon because you are a trash even thinking about cheating
>>
>>23146779
Woman detected
>>
>>23146713
>>23146779
This. You aren't a match.
>>
>>23146022
Men's "logic" if you have such a big problem just leave her and fuck whoever or whatever you want you sex driven individual- instead of ruining her life. Poor girl.
>>
>>23146801
I agree. Leave the poor girl alone. You value sex more than your partner
>>
>>23146801
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas queen
>>
>>23146022
dump the defective bitch and move on.
>>
>>23146801
Women's "logic" you do not get to feel unsatisfied when it comes to sex because you're male. *Proceeds to suck a stranger's dick*
>>
Fuck it, I'm cheating. I shot my friend a text and she's coming over.
>>
>>23146801
Women's logic is using the same "my pussy hurts" excuse for 6 months.
>>
>>23146898
Don't tell me you're staying in that relationship.
>>
>>23146910
I am, I still love her
>>
>>23146915
But she doesn't love you.
>>
>>23146904
If she is using an "excuse" then he can fucking open his mouth and ask her what's going on and why she doesn't want to see a doctor instead of being a man whore and hopping from one bed to another. Is SEX all that's left inside men's minds nowadays??
>>
>>23146940
I fucking hate men. They say they want a relationship but they actually don't want one.
>>
>>23146940
Imagine thinking being in a relationship for 6 months without sex is healthy
>>
>>23146953
A relationship without sex is what we call a friendship
>>
>>23146957
Who forces him to stay in such relationship????
>>
>>23146969
Love, woman
>>
>>23146972
I think people who write about love and cheating in one post have serious mental problems
>>
>>23146983
People can be in love and still cheat if there's something lacking in the relationship
Only virgins say people in love can't cheat
>>
>>23146972
>Love
>cheats
I want all men to die.
>>
>>23146991
Cool dude
>>
>>23146989
Why would you cheat if you're in love? I've had sex with 10+ guys but have never been in love. Cheating means you will hurt someone. How can you hurt someone you love?
>>
>>23147002
If you've never been in love then where's your horse in this race
>>
>>23147002
If you're unfulfilled in a relationship then you don't see cheating as hurting someone but getting what you need or deserve
>>
>>23147010
I'm all for breakup. If it hurst the girl, she is not attracted to him. It always hurts, but if you find the guy attractive you will bite through that. Maybe she already has the feeling he hates not having sex with her but doesn't want to say it as she is comfy in this relationship. She wants him to breakup.
>>
>>23146898
just break up with her RETARD
>>
>>23146989
If you need something you cant get in a relationship then be honest, end it and go look for it somewhere else. Cheating and lies are the highest form of disrespect and aberrations and people who think its ok to cheat have serious issues with themselves.
>>
Was she a virgin? How many times as she had sex? I was a virgin when i met my bf, after maybe 10 times of having sex it stopped hurting
>>
>>23146231

>I just want some healthy non-regressive sexual releas

God's probably not granting you your wish because you're using too many adjectives. Try again, but this time be less descriptive
>>
>>23146940
why is it always a man's responsibility? are women so lacking in common sense that they'd rather sit around doing nothing until their man tells them to go to the doctor due to a medical problem?
>>
>>23147085
I thought that it was normal to talk about problems in a relationship, to take care of each other, to ask whats going on?? But obviously it isnt normal for people who are so messed up they think love and cheating is ok/possible at the same time
>>
>>23147110
yes. so why didnt she communicate jack shit in the past 6 months about a very clear-cut medical issue? or drag her ass to the doctor on her own accord?
>>
>>23146022
If ya'll aren't sexually compatible, then what's the point in being in a sexual romantic relationship. Just break up and be friends and go fuck around. No need to cheat and make it worse.
>>
>>23147139
>a very clear-cut medical issue
Because it isn't a medical issue, anon.
>>
>>23146022
I'll be real with you.

Just cheat. You're just human, i.e a flawed ape. Humans can only do so much before they sacrifice a good aspect of themselves.

Most people are degenerates, you'll probably be cheated on at some point anyway and not by her necessarily.

If you cheat though, make sure she doesn't find out. You owe her that much.
>>
>>23147139
I dont know why and i dont know why he doesn't know why?? It would be easier to just ASK instead of being stuck with no answers but his twisted "logic" somehow led him to thinking no sex, no answers, i have a problem i will fuck a friend (?!?!)
>>
>>23146969
Break ups are hurtful and costly. Cheating when the cheated doesn't find out isn't so.

If your girlfriend thinks about another guy she knows while you're fucking her that can be very shitty of her to do so, despite it not being cheating. But if you don't know about it, no harm done. If she left the relationship because she felt dirty and unjust, then she ends up hurting the boyfriend.

If you're gonna think of something or do something that can hurt the other person, you either don't do it or keep it to yourself. If you can't help doing or thinking about that hurtful thing, than at least bear the burden of secrecy.

People push for breakups and wonder why so many ppl are lonely.
>>
Honestly, different people want different things in a relationship. If you value sex more than your gf, you should break up with her and find somebody else.
>>
>>23147172
I still cant see a logic in this. Break ups hurt but its better to stay in a relationship being unhappy, losing respect for that girl ?? As i wrote earlier people who solve their problems with lies and cheating are messed up. No excuses.
>>
I didn't cheat. I told my friend I needed some time to think about my relationship and that I couldn't do it behind my gf's back.
>>
>>23147172
>Break ups are hurtful and costly. Cheating when the cheated doesn't find out isn't so
But cheating is costly, you end up splitting intimacy and having to lie to your partner, undermining your relationship. Caused guilt, having to be on guard else they find out the truth...none of that is “free”
>>
>>23147199
Cheating is done by cowards unless kids are involved, in which case you can cheat if staying together is In the best interest of the kids
>>
>>23146898
Then when she dumps you and you grow old and alone you will blame women for not wanting to date you.
>>
File: images (8).jpg (10 KB, 204x247)
10 KB
10 KB JPG
Same but monthly/ovulation or less, and likely not painful (gets off too, almost every time). I wouldn't cheat, but she got mad both when I raised it as an issue, as well as when I gave up completely (she never initiates or even compliments me ever).

Can someone explain why she got mad when I stopped bothering her? I don't understand why it has to be the exact miserable frequency she unconsciously wants.
>>
>>23147368
Why would you want a relationship without sex
>>
>>23146022
>>23147468
These sound rough. Why would a woman do this? Do they not value physical intimacy as much?
>>
>>23147493
Yea why cheat when you can break up?
>>
>>23146801
>>23146940
>>23146953
>>23146991
>"men are so terrible they only think about sex!"
Literally one trip to reddit's "deadbedrooms" sub would show you this happens to loads of women too and the loneliness drives them to consider cheating just as much. But I guess fembots are either too unhealthy/low-libido or whorish to imagine being a neglected girlfriend, they'd be the ones neglecting instead.
>>
>>23147468
>she got mad both when I raised it as an issue, as well as when I gave up
That's hilarious.
>>
>>23146801
Women cheat all the time
>>
>>23146940
You are a loser
>>
>>23147528
Makes me not want a gf.
>>
>>23147528
Ugly bfs probably.
>>
>>23148256
nope. i'm 6'4 with a roided model-tier body. fucked 20+ WASP chicks at the local colleges before meeting my gf. We have sex once a month because it hurts. She was a virgin. But we had sex regularly when we first met over a year ago, because she wanted to impress me. I want to fucking kill myself every day
>>
>>23148284
>because she wanted to impress me.
If she doesn't want to do that anymore it's over, bro.
>>
>>23148293
the only reason I stayed with her is because of how much she loves me. I am the only source of meaning in her life. Loyal to a fault. My pain is her pain. She does everything for me, with the exception of a functional sex drive.
>>
>>23148310
>with the exception of a functional sex drive
Wouldn't that mean that you guys are best friends and not lovers? Seems tough man.
>>
>>23147064
This, if you don't have sex frequently it hurts the first few times.
>>
>>23146953
>be honest about not wanting a relationship
>"anon, sorry but I'm not a slut, I only sleep with people I'm in a relationship with!"
>other guy says "hey baby be my gf"
>"omg yass babe I love u!"
>he gets some fugg
>dumps her after getting his nut
Who won here?
>>
>>23146022
My current FWB is a little drier than other girls I've slept with and EXTREMELY tight.

The tightness is nice but sometimes I feel there is too much friction. She struggles to put my cock in.

INB4 foreplay yadda yadda. I'm good at foreplay and other girls in my past have been much wetter with the same foreplay.

ADVICE ANYONE?
>>
>>23148392
What if he doesn't get the fugg like OP?
>>
>>23148405
Did you miss the point of my greentext?
>>
>>23148324
it feels that way. I'm not even a romantic, but she is. I never used the word love with a girl before until she had normalized it between us. She still tells me how sexy I am, and she snuggles me like a helpless child multiple times per day. I can make her orgasm with my fingers easily, but penetration is just a no go, even though she gushes like a waterfall. Occasionally I can enter her with no pain and we have a great time, but it's so rare these days. I raised the issue a few times and she began tearing up asking if I would break up with her because of it. What can you say but no
>>
>>23148445
>I'm not even a romantic, but she is. I never used the word love with a girl before until she had normalized it between us.
Sounds bad. like you're just doing this for her. You shouldn't have said no, really. Sex is an important part of being in a romantic relationship.
>>
Faggot fell for the oldest trick in the book!

ENGAGE: OPERATION UNEXPECTED VISITOR
>>
>>23148394

Lube.
>>
>>23148469
it is bad. I am hypersexual as well. Lately I've been jerking off in the bathroom at work, or waiting until she gets in the shower. I have many regrets, but she is the happiest girl in the world right now. There's no easy resolution. She moved into my apartment 6 months ago. I'm her only real friend, and the idea of kids/marriage/house have been an afterthought since last year, to her at least. Maybe things will work out OK in the end but this is not the way I imagined my life would go. I will be miserable with either outcome because I am sort of a miserable person. I think about killing myself every day, hoping that reality is merely a projection of my mind. That way nobody actually exists and can be hurt when I'm gone.
>>
>>23148394
Bump. More advice needed.

Do some girls just not get as wet and need lube? Going off this, are some girls naturally tighter and drier than others?
>>
>>23148517
I have real questions that require real-world solutions. Fuck this coomer getting cucked who started the thread
>>
>>23146022
do it faggot
>>
>>23146953
I actually don't want a relationship but every girl I fuck always twists my arm into one.
>>
>>23146231
kek
>>
>>23146779
then what's he supposed to do? stay with someone who doesn't want to have sex? why?
>>
>>23147542
what difference does it make. there are going to break up anyway
>>
>>23146801
a relationship without intimacy is just friendship it seems like
>>
>>23149046
..........break up obviously??
>>
>>23146022
Your girlfriend has a medical problem. Take her to a doctor instead of thinking about cheating.
>>
>>23148517
You do think about killing yourself but not about breaking up? You have more problems.
>>
THE FUCK? 6 months without it and you now want to cheat. Lmao. Let her go and she'll find someone she's more comfortable being intimate with. If you're actually having these thoughts, don't ever talk to her again. You're wasting her time.
>>
>>23146022
>>23146089
I mean, she might not actually be interested. She might have a medical issue. You may need to be more gentle or take your time. How does she feel about foreplay? It sounds like she's not really relaxed.
>>23146904
>"my pussy hurts" excuse for 6 months

Try having an object shoved into your orifice, shit hurts.
>>
Get the fuck outta there. Let me tell you that if you are not fucking like rabbits that early in the relationship long term wise your ARE FUCKED. The longer you are with most women the less sex you get. So if you are not getting enough now head for ze hills brother!
>>
>>23148256
Nah, the only bros who ever vented about this to me were more attractive than their girlfriends.
>>
>>23146022
>cheating
>>
recriminalize adultery
kill every single cheating subhuman
>>
>>23149799
When the orifice is biologically designed for shoving things in it, your whole shitty argument falls flat, you literal retard
>>
have you used lube, also not fucking small south east Asian women to imitate children
>>
>>23147528
A lot of women are in relationships because they don't want to be alone and/or its beneficial that a man is there to handle important stuff. A surprising amount of women don't even find men attractive.
>>
>>23146022
She's got an issue and she needs to sort it out.
If the relationship isn't doing it for you man, you've got grounds to walk
>>
>>23146022
if she is aware of your desire for sex and intimacy and the levels of stress it’s causing you, and is doing nothing to help it, dump her. that sucks.

or, her pussy always hurts from getting railed out by other dudes every day.
>>
>>23149997
>The longer you are with most women the less sex you get.
Why?
>>
File: Hayez-Malinconia-1.jpg (714 KB, 2000x2772)
714 KB
714 KB JPG
Here's what I did OP.

>wife was the same
>"I don't want to"
>"I feel tired today.."
>"I have a headache"
>Tell her that I will start fucking other women because I have my urges and she can't fulfill my desires.
>she tells me to go ahead, but that sex is not important for her
>I install several dating apps and start fucking other women
>always inform my wife whenever I meet one of my FWB
>she starts to become afraid of losing me because I would literally spend entire weekends fucking other women
>changes completely and now enjoys sex
>I stopped fucking other women but told her that I expect her to keep wanting to have sex with me or else I will do it again
>now she even loves anal and wants us to do it all the time.

The problem was solved, and I had fun.
>>
>>23150691
Because they take you for granted and don't feel the same excitement as during the honeymoon phase. The husband is now the provider, and they feel secure in their lives.

Many women then start having affairs because of this.
>>
>>23150731
>in today's edition of things that didn't happen
>>
>>23150742
This absolutely happened. I had two FWB during the first half of this year.
Been together when my wife for 11 years now.
>>
>>23150753
Proof?
>>
>>23150757
How should I even give you any proof of this?
>>
>>23150762
Post pics
>>
>>23150771
>>23150771
Pics of what?
>>
>>23150778
Chats or pics,of your fwb
>>
>>23150053
I want a handsome bf to fuck me every day.
>>
>>23150815
It's possible you would take it for granted once you have it, and get bored.
>>
>>23146022
>I have a friend I can dial at any time and have sex with her whenever I want and it's been really hard not to do it

Doesn't this seem unusual or am I just an autist and this is common? Is it really so normal for guys to know a girl they can fuck whenever on demand, no strings attached? It's not the first time I've seen people on /adv/ claim to have this kind of relationship but it just seems so alien to the way I've always known girls to behave, surely it's just exaggeration and bragging?
>>
>>23151038
There's always a slut or beta orbiter in every friend group
>>
>>23150984
I practice being grateful every day.
>>
>>23151135
Good for you.
>>
>>23146779
True.

Matthew 5:28 "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."
>>
File: 1605644140692.jpg (44 KB, 640x539)
44 KB
44 KB JPG
>>23146898
>>
>>23150731
I really don’t understand this, like... why not just leave her in the first place? Your wife probably lives in constant paranoia now that she isn’t enough and probably feigns liking anal to keep you around. I don’t know why people do all this work when sometimes libido can ultimately become a dealbreaker
>>
>>23150731
>now she even loves anal and wants us to do it all the time.
So the twist was that you were gay all along and running off with "women". Disgusting.
>>
>>23150737
Are they this fickle?
>>
>>23151285
Because I love her. Why should I leave her just because of sex? The deal we had worked and I got my urges fulfilled, she changed and now it's much better.

>>23151387
lmao
>>
I don't get it. Why would you be in a relationship with someone you're not attracted to enough to have regular intimacy with? Why would you put the person you claim to like through that?

Anyone can explain?
>>
>>23151721
see >>23150737

Women are like this. Even some men are like this, they start seeing their wives/husbands/etc as an extension of themselves and not as a person anymore. They stop being attracted sexually because it's not exciting anymore.
>>
>>23149366
but why? she's wasting OP's time selfishly
>>
>>23146081
>>23146022

Not all the time. My girlfriend has a pretty shallow vagina and when I go a little too rough on her she gets a little sore. However, she has never denied me of sex because she was "sore" though.

However, I will agree that if she suddenly is "sore" or "hurts" and it becomes a habit, she is losing interest and will maybe pitty fuck you once a week or something. I know this because when I started getting tired of having sex with my ex, she'd make all the moves to initiate and I'd just tell her I'm tired.
>>
She has RHD, Resilient Hymen Disorder, basically you need to insist upon vaginal penetration, and thrust it in hard and fast in one go. If you are erect enough and you thrust it in fast enough, her hymen will be broken and she will now be able to enjoy sex.
>>
>>23151968
Fake
>>
>>23147468
>tfw no neglected bf to steal for myself
>>
>>23146022
you could use lubrication, or you need to step up your foreplay game and make her more wet, fingering and eating out.
>>
>>23149756
>THE FUCK? 6 months without it and you now want to cheat. Lmao. Let her go and she'll find someone she's more comfortable being intimate with. If you're actually having these thoughts, don't ever talk to her again. You're wasting her time.
I'm not saying this is bad advice, but why is the burden of leaving put on the guy who is obviously more into the girl than she is into him? She would have been aware of this problem way before him, why didn't she breakup then?
>>
>>23146801
>be person
>want to be in a relationship with another person
>don't satisfy your partner sexually in any way
>partners natural needs aren't fullfilled, they get urges to get them fulfilled elsewhere
The gender doesn't really matter here, you just want to make it a man vs woman thing
>>
>>23151776
How so?
>>
>>23155119
>I want you to be committed to me. be a provider and give me your attention
>but I won't give you sex, that takes 5-20 minutes maybe a few times a week or even once a week
>>
>>23150731
>she starts to become afraid of losing me because I would literally spend entire weekends fucking other women

LARP detected.

> I expect her to keep wanting to have sex with me or else I will do it again

Legitimately makes you a scumbag, not sure why you would want to tell us your shitty behavior, but you didn't do that because you love her, you did it because you're a selfish person, that's all.
>>
>>23150731
This op. Just tell her you're going to see other women on the side.
>>
>>23155379
I really did that. I had a FWB that I would spend entire weekends with her.

how am I selfish?
>>
>>23155529
Just ignore the sois. Both men and women are dumb and lie to themselves.

What you described is just how the world works. Women desire sex differently than men.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KzCfIYArmQ
>>
>>23155564
At least give us the tl;dw of your pseudoscience video, no one is going to waste time on it otherwise. Video is terrible for non-visual learning, targeting easily-swayed illiterates.
>>
>>23146349
Dude there is literally a medical condition regarding this. I forgot the exact name for it but it’s when a woman’s vagina is too tight to the point of any form of penetration hurts them, I remember seeing a random article about this in the newspaper a while ago.
>>
>>23146787
so? is cheating really a good thing . imagine only seeing women for sex and if she cant do that then its time to cheat like what the hell
>>
>>23146787
i know this might sound crazy but sex isnt always going to be the center of a relationship for some relationships.
>>
>>23156142
>>23156146
>if you're not grateful for sex twice a year then you must be sex obsessed and objectifying your partner
The absolute state of simps/thots.
>>
>>23156142
then why should men commit to women? sex and support is their end of the bargain in a relationship

if a women is even the slightest bit bored of a relationship everyone on the internet and real life will come out and defend her if she cheats on her bf/husband. the other way around is too controversial
>>
>>23156229
>is going to be posting on /r/deadbedrooms a year after getting married wondering where it went all wrong
>>
>>23146022
Just do it. At one point I'd say talk to her, but I'm so tired of women having no responsibility in relationships that personally she should no what no pussy is doing to you. Her not realizing that is the result of a shitty gf so go get your dick wet. Any woman with common sense and not her head up her own ass knows that fucking her man is what keeps his eyes on her.
>>
>>23146898
Get that shit my boy. Proud of you. Fuck these moralets
>>
>>23146953
Fun fact: suddenly stopping something that's an integral part of our relationship doesnt make me love you more. If anything it plants a seed of resentment that grows fast. That's why relationships are those of compromise you dumb cunt, sorry that you bitches have to sack some level of comfort if you want a loyal loving guy.
>>
>>23146022
Penetration certainly can hurt, but that usually doesn't happen until after menopause which I assume she is very far from.
There's legit psychological issues going on here, and this physical thing is the tip of the iceberg. Since you are obviously in the relationship for only one thing, that she is not giving, best to gtfo.
>>
>>23147025
This, patrice said it best. If you gotta cheat, do it righteously. Dont go get pussy cause you wanna say "yeah look at this shit babe", do it cause you legitimately want sex but cant get it.
>>
>>23147147
I agree. Get your dick wet, cover your tracks, never speak of it.
>>
>>23156525
>Since you are obviously in the relationship for only one thing, that she is not giving, best to gtfo
I don't get this berating of OP. Yes, cheating is pretty despicable, but we're talking 6 MONTHS here. He's not obsessed with sex like you're making it out, or he'd have posted this way earlier.

It's ridiculous. You could do this to any basic element of a relationship. If OP stopped talking to his wife for 6 months and she sought to cheat or leave out of loneliness, would you blame her for being "only in the relationship for one thing", that being talking?



Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.