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Previous Thread: >>34012398

GoogleDoc Pastebin Archive:https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gf8UOWR5eIfp8FqpAWt3EUrSCCocOWazrZlMiTJwAYs

Old CrazyRain's Stories' Archives:https://pastebin.com/z3CWqhnG

Prompt Archives:
The ride is almost over
Oh hush, worst thing that will happen is g5. Other than that people are autistic enough to keep going.
>Other than that people are autistic enough to keep going.
understatement of the century.
the sweetiebot project advanced to the point it can fucking walk.
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Would laying a marely mare across you lap and lavishing her with pets be demeaning?
no, but denying her belly-rubs would be
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Fuck off already, retard
Yeah, but your mom said she was good for round 2.
You may quit, but ponies stay forever. The ride is far from over, they're just running detail repairs on the carriage before we get to go back on.
>Build robopone
>Start bootup sequence
>Eyes flicker on and it looks at you
>"What are you?"
"The one that made you."
>"You're not my dad! Send me back to Ponyville."
>tfw when you accidentally abduct a cartoon character across space and time
So, going back to the Gamer Shim idea. What kind of streamer is she? The fun streamer who tries to be helpful or more entertaining? Or is she a gaming bully, someone who would t-bag (titty-bag) someone else on stream while screaming at them to "GIT GUD, SCRUB"?
...dammit, does anyone have that pic of Spitfire (or is it Blaze?) draped over a human's lap?
>Tries to play nice and make friends
>Emphasis on tries
>With a temper as big as hers she tends to lose it more often than not which leads to her getting a reputation
>She becomes the face of toxic femininity even though she generally tries to apologize to everyone after the match is over
>Doesn't keep her from getting temp bans for 'toxic' behavior though
Fun, absolutely. But she started out as one of the douchebags who players hated but viewers loved, because she was good enough to back up her shit-talking/autistic screaming. But once she met Anon and they started to fuck (and, if Sunset's being honest: kiss and hold hands and cuddle under a blanket)? All that pent-up aggression leaked out until she became the helpful and cheery streamer we know today.
>Shimmer can't keep her temper for shit unless Anon is around to calm her down
>Anon doesn't mind at all having to calm Shimmer
>Everyone else thinks this is absolutely hilarious and calls Shimmer whipped
Nailed it. Thanks, Anon.
>"What the fuck you fucking spawn peaking bitch! I'm going to-"
"Have you tried getting good?"
>"I'm taking a break."
"Cool. My turn."
>T-1 Shimmer streamer
God fucking yes
Remember, it doesn't count as rape if she has hearts in her eyes.
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>Shimmy and Anon thought it would be fun to get a mascot
>Enter, Ray
>Metal. Gear. Ray.
>No one but Anon gets the joke
>Rainbow Dash is amazed that an unsolicited flank-pic actually worked
>"Rarity told me that stallions just tell you to buck off when you do this!"
>Rainbow thinks she might have found The One
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>Are you coming into me
>coming into me
>into me
not yet she isn't
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>halo butifal colt very sex
>show bal
>do sperm
>Rainbow thinks she might have found The One
Humans have folklore of an invisible red string binding two soulmates together even from birth, but in Equestria it's pretty much a real thing, except... There are thousands of mares and fillies (and some colts and stallions) that have strings that are not connected to one another but extend far upwards into the sky.
Some of them even twist together into a single rope that will bind strongly with one person..
>"shoe me cok and baals"
>"i wanna kiss ur bepis"
Bastard lasagna
>I send request 3 time and you no respond
>i have disise I need bal or lose cuttle mark
>do sperm
>show bal or i report you
>shit you, badstard i mony
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But what if you scar them for life with a scary game?
Cadance is the only pony who can see these strings, and as the princess of love it breaks her heart that so many ponies will never meet their soulmate.
So, using funds from the Crystal Empire treasury she creates an exploratory committee to determine if space travel is possible
>Some other mare texts you while you're busy with Rainbow
>"hey cutiepie what are you up to?"
>Rainbow grabs your phone and snaps a pic of your marecum glazed face buried in her tutti-fruiti pussy.
>"Hes busy with an real mare text back never lol"
>She hits 'send' just as she cums so hard it arches her back and sprays more delicious marecum into your mouth.
>tfw it was your adoptive grandma texting you to see how you're doing
>tfw you explain it to Rainbow afterwards
>tfw it makes introducing her to family really awkward
this anon gets it
>Grown up Gabby declares you her mate
>Makes you stay in (admittedly comfy) nest
>Gives you meat and hugs, says mating season is coming soon
Wat do?
that would be hilarious and horrofying too, how do you explain to her she is just a fictional character that became real?
she is the first one, she is alone and all her life was merely a lie, a dream that she finally woke up from.
the only thing left would be to recreate ponyville and its inhabitants.
Welp, guess I am griffon married, and I gotta get a house made. Ain't no babies of mine falling out a nest. And have to get some walls up before she gets her brains fucked out.
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>griffins don't steal males don't be silly
>now send us males you filthy bigot
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>poking around the castle
>aint shit to do
>suddenly loud horse
>"Hither peasant. Come and entertain us?"
>the fuck is wrong with this horse
>whatever just do the same thing with her that you do when the other ponies are being annoying
>grab the horse and flip her on her back
>give her belly rubs until she's catatonic
>hfw she gets back up
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>Anon defeats villains by showing them some genuine love and holding them tight
>Feathery and furry love birb
Why would you not want this?
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>implying jews can't be cute
>no hooves
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>ywn get hit on by a mare who tried to learn english to talk to you in your native language
>ywn drop your pants for her
Why a Red Dawn Redemption reference?
Dunno why OP chose that pic. Maybe this?

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>tfw she *isn't* fictional, and you really did accidentally abduct her from somewhere in the multiverse.
Rarity is so going to kick your ass, anon.
That video is just a perfect example as to why ponies are the ultimate waifus. They'll defend you with their lives, and dish out sick combos onto YAKS who try to get all up in your business.
The fun, helpful kind. I do like >>34026778 ideas.

I kinda like this idea but mixed with the one a while back where he was hired to be her tutor and a slow burn romance started off.

I could see RD doing this.

I don't think it would be awkward at all in RGRE. If any thing Grandma would be proud her grandson nabbed a marely mare with the teats to protect what's hers.

Put her in the Mating Press position.
>turn it off in a panic.
>fiddle with things and turn her back on.
>"Gah! You again! I thought this was a dream! Why are you doing this?!"

What do?
>made in Unity
Talk about passion projects.
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All I will say is, I had a medical thing and I live in America.
>Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/u/PoppedAnon
>Paste: https://pastebin.com/wSBBJhvh
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>The sun shines brightly as it makes its journey across the skies.
>It always does when you’re above the clouds
>Up here the skies are always clear, there are no rainy days, and even the wind is always cool and easy.
>And if you don’t want it cool and easy, you’re always a few flaps away from a killer jet stream.
>A minute flex of your wings results in you banking right, speed maintained, as the wind passes over you like a stone in a river.
>Verdant hills give way to stony mountains, which in turn become snowy peaks.
>Soon even that disappears under the thick clouds.
>You can’t imagine ever not loving the absolute freedom that you feel in these skies.
>You can’t imagine why some of your family can be bored of such an awesome experience.
>’If I ever get bored of flying I hope my feathers fall out.’
>Your wings give a few flaps and your speed increases to insane degrees, and still play with your aerobatics.
>You are a black spot in the sky tailed by a dark yellow streak easily seen by anypony who even glances in your direction.
>But only the keen eyes of a pegasus could even hope to keep track of all of your banks, rolls, and turns.
>”Ok class, lets get started on today’s lesson.” a feminine voice says, tiredly
>’Still time.’
>The narrowed view of dragons, and the clumsy wings on griffons leave them no hope of keeping up.
>And no hope of winning.
OH SHIT! HE LIV! Are you ok Popped? It's been way too long since we last saw you post.
>Through the cloud cover the high peaks of the griffon capital, Griffonstone, stand defiantly against the beautiful clear skies.
>The filthy nests and gnarled trees contrasts against the shining buildings made from plundered riches that sit in the branches.
>”Take your seats everypony.”
“Thunderbirds on our 10, I’ll engage and distract. Get the Idol.”
>You feel the wind shift as your team breaks off to hit the palace.
>You speed up dipping into the cloud cover only to burst up from underneath them.
>They never expect attacks from below, and they’d never see an attack on their capital coming.
>Especially in broad daylight
>Your reward is your hooves pushing deep into the abdomen of a thunderbird who was laughing with his friends before you knocked the breath out of him.
“Regards from Equestria, birdbrains!” you shout as you soar through the group.
>The audacity of your brazen attack stuns them for a moment before they raise the cry and pursue.
>Thanks to your speed that moment became a quarter mile of distance.
>Would be half a mile if it wasn’t for the extra weight.
“If you think this is the worst your day could get, just wait a minute.”
>As you fly higher and higher your flaps propel you less and less, and the underside if the griffon grows darker and darker as it is silhouetted against the sun even at arm’s length
>Once you feel the extra bit of chill from flying so high, you tilt your wings and stall into a freefall.
>In a moment you’re flapping back to the group as fast as you can go with the extra drag in front of you.
>Not being able to keep a smirk off your face you stop flapping and tuck your limbs as close to your body as you can manage.
>With a tilt you separate from the griffon, taking advantage of its larger size, the blinding glare of the sun behind you, and your dark color to hide in its shadow.
>The griffons are knocked back, by their unconscious comrade.
>”Macintosh Apple?” you hear the voice say
>”I’m here!” a more masculine one replies
>You pursue to take advantage of the momentary chaos, but you feel your fur standing on end.
>You don’t know where it’s coming from, but you know that you shouldn’t be where you are.
>Your wings work double time to reverse course, and you change direction just in time to see a blue lightening bolt split the sky where you were an instant ago.
>’Well, the element of surprise was fun while it lasted.’
>You scan the skies to see the fully armed and armored thunderbirds, and more coming from the palace.
>Their bronze armor masks their features and contrasts with their shining silver tridents, already crackling with magic lightning
“Oh good, you chickens remembered to bring the forks!” you taunted.
>One of them squawked and fired, missing only because you had already shifted the direction of your flap while you were talking.
>’Any pegasi, and some keen earth ponies would’ve seen the shift and had you stunned and on your way to the dungeons’
>’Lucky for me griffons’ eyes are as terrible as their wings.’
>Shifting again, you launched yourself upward, and then immediately broke away from the guards struggling to keep up.
>’No straight lines for long, break at hard angles...’
>You clasped your right wing to your side and extended the left one and flapped hard.
>Rolling from your current direction and out of the paths of the latest storm of lightening bolts.
>You then dove into the clouds and broke to the left.
>You feel the clouds rumble as the electricity enters them.
>Zigzagging in the clouds you see a shadow overhead and burst out, striking the guard in the gut.
>You quickly grab him and drag him into the cloud cover.
>You leave him there gasping for breath, but you do take his trident.
>As you focus, your own magic leeches into the weapon and charges it.
>Unlike the blue plasma of the griffons, your magic lightening shines a brilliant yellow.
“Oh, yeah.” you say with a smile
>You push the guard to the surface of the cloud, more gently than he deserves and glide out from beneath the cloud watching the shadows converge on the guard.
>You catch an updraft and tilt your wings upward and rise above the clouds silently and with no magic trail to track.
>Rising above the clouds you see the guards trying to rouse their comrade.
>’At least they’re more respectable than the lizards.’
>A dragon will only care about one of their fallen fellows until they find where their horde was.
“Bok bok bok bok bok bokaw!” you shout.
>The guards all turn and you fire the trident, striking one of them.
“I knew you guys spoke chicken!” yell before you dove under the clouds and flew towards them, completely avoiding the volley of lightening.
>Only to be grazed by a bolt from below.
“Argh!” your reactionary scream is immediately cut off by you gritting your teeth.
>You right your flying and look down to see the griffon citizenry and some more thunderbirds aiming their tridents and the odd crossbow at you.
>’That’s right, all eyes on me.’
“How many griffons does it take to NOT hit a single pegasus?”, you shout, twisting your wings in all matter of directions with the sole goal to keep from being in a predictable path.
>While you did this you took pot shots at any griffon that managed to aim with anything approaching success.
>’I can’t keep this up, how long does it take to take a rinky dink little statuette?’
>As if on queue, two streaks catch your vision as your team flees from the castle.
>Once you see they’re clear, your eyes get to work checking for escape routes.
>But most of your vision is taken up by the massive black cloud.
>A smile parts your lips.
>’The massive, electricity filled, cloud.’
>You cut away and make a beeline for the cloud, trading evasion for speed.
>You fire the trident at the cloud again and again trying to get a few more volts in.
“Ahhh, fffff” you shout as a lightening bolt hits solidly, bringing intense pain before making your rear left leg go numb.
>You turn and fire a shot at the thunderbird, which he had barely managed to evade.
>What he didn’t evade was you throwing the trident at him like a javalin.
>It didn’t penetrate his armor, but it did get caught in his mail at his wing pit.
>A second without flapping in all that armor and he fell like a stone, and a couple of his comrades broke off to keep him from spatting.
>However the second of distraction was all you needed.
>Working your wings to their limits you flew into the cloud, but instead of swimming through it like a fish you were bucking everything around you.
>Despite it being filled with griffon magic it still responded to your strikes.
>The cloud started rumbling louder and louder as it was filled with your magic and the arcing lightening built upon itself exponentially.
“Churn the cloud, to generate lighting, strike it to get it roiling, and when it hits it’s peak...” you say mindlessly quoting your mother.
>With a powerful flap you escape from the cloud, where half the battalion of thunderbirds are ready for you.
>Shocking them by completely ignoring them you slam into the cloud with all the force your hooves can muster.
“START THE STORM!” you cry out.
>The thunder is deafening.
>The lightening is blinding.
>Despite your natural defenses, you aren’t unaffected by the cataclysm of electricity you have unleashed on Griffonstone.
>No doubt due to the fact that the majority of the lightening was made with griffon magic.
>’Just keep going, just keep going.’ you repeat mentally as you force your numb hooves to keep kicking.
“Ahhh, buck!”
>You topple into the cloud, struggling to breathe as you see only black and flashes of yellow or blue.
>”Major?!” you hear one of your airmares shout
>You grunt in reply, before groaning in pain.
>You hear him sigh and laugh a little, “You suck at distracting ponies.”
>You laugh back a little pained
“I’d be better if your fat flanks laid off the pies.”, you reply
>You grit your teeth and let the stallion help you up, before continuing.
“Bit hard to get ponies to miss a blimp with wings.”, you laugh, “Even these half-blind bird brains could see you.”
>He can’t help but laugh, but in an instant his pupils contract to pinpoints and before you can move he shoves you away
>”T, behind y-! Argh!” you look on to see a sapphire bolt strike him in his chest.
>You spare an instant to turn and see the perpetrator, the griffon you stole the trident from.
>It had a look of disappointment on its face before it dropped its comrade’s trident and passes out.
>As soon as you see that he is no longer a threat, you turn to the rest of the ponies.
“Idol takes priority, straight to Canterlot full speed.” they don’t even salute before taking off.
>Not that you would know if they did because as soon as the last word left your mouth you were flying straight down as fast as your wings would allow.
>’When you’re on the front you realize what true brotherhood is.’
>Your already strained flight muscles are pushed to their limits as your grandfather’s words echo in your head.
>’We all got hurt during the war. Some far worse than others, but damn if I let them take my brothers and damn if I didn’t make them pay for it.’
>You break through the still roiling clouds and see the white airmare plummeting towards the Abysmal Abyss.
>’Watch your brother’s back, and come home together.’
>The crosswinds pick up as you near the point of no return, it takes everything you have to maintain your trajectory.
>’To do any less would make you no better than those damn lizards or their queen!’
>His mane is caught by the wind and blows out of his face, and he looks like he is at peace, enjoying a sunny day.
“No, please. Not yet.” you whisper to the wind
>You tuck your wings close together to catch less of the increasing winds, stabilizing you but slowing you down slightly.
“I swore I would bring you back home. I promised your mom, dude.”
>You were closing the distance, he was nearly within arm’s reach.
“It should’ve been me, I’m the reckless one.”, your hoof brushes against his as you search for a good grip before you hit the gale force winds below where there would be no hope of escape.
>Suddenly he opens his eyes wide and stares into yours.
>An all too familiar voice rings out, ”I thought you had my back T-”
>”Thunder.” a feminine voice calls out.
>Just like that the pain in your wings, the fatigue, and the...stallion disappears.
>The Abysmal Abyss turns into the black inside of your eyelids.
>You raise your hoof.
>’I’m so tired of that nightmare.’
“Here, ma’am.”, you stretch you wings and open your eyes, and see Ms. Polish.
“Ms. Polish, are you ok? You look bad today.” you say truthfully.
>Her ear twitches slightly, she bits a small portion of her lip for a moment, and the muscles below her eyebrows strain to not crease.
>”Yes Thunder, I’m fine. Just a bit tired today, so l-”
>’That’s no good, sleep is important.’
“Make sure to get enough sleep Ms. Polish, it’s how you keep your brain sharp and your magic going good.” you say concerned for the older mare, “Try to take a nap at recess or something.”
>You see the few pegasai in the class nodding in agreement.
>You see she sighs and shakes her head doing her best not to smile
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>”So it seems Thunder wishes to begin with pony physiology.” she says her lips pursed and eyes lidded and blinking slower than usual due to her sleepiness.
>You put a little more base in your voice and talked steadily.
“I mean it Ms. Polish, those grades can wait your health is more important.”
>’Maybe be a little more pragmatic approach will help.’
“Plus you looked a lot prettier yesterday.”, you replied making sure to smile.
>The classroom erupted in “Oooooooooo”s and rambunctiousness.
>You looked around at the class, randomly accusing you of having a crush on the teacher.
“Ya’ll saying she looks better today than yesterday?” you asked the class.
>You had a hard time hiding your smile at their reaction.
>Not only did they seriously consider it, but there was also the general confusion about how unfazed you were about the whole thing.
>”Alright class, enough about my appearance and sleep schedule. We’re getting started on today’s lesson.”
>The chalk was wrapped in a sky blue aura and draws out a simple image of a pony on the board
>”Today we’ll be talking about the magical systems of each pony tribe, please take out your notes and let’s begin.” Ms. Polish says, smiling despite herself.
That actually sounds pretty fucking terrifying. A mystical string that connects you inextricably to something in the fucking sky? How long until that, possibly mind-breakingly horrible, thing decides it's time to start pulling you up to it? Messed. Up.
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I have no idea why 4chan got mad at me and decided that it hated images for a while, but I guess hiroshimoot fell asleep.
That's it for now, now that I am neither in agony or drugged out my head I'll be here more often.
Next update will be one of the other stories. See you kids next time.
Get well soon and great update Popped
i'm not entirely sure what that was, but I think I like it. welcome back Popped
>now that I am neither in agony or drugged out my head I'll be here more often.
HUZZAH! Glad to see you back and doing better. What story will it be next time? More of the Rarara dating with a dash of the best Ponks or will it be something else?
Because TF is shit and rightfully deserves punishment, not sure why you think it wouldn't happen.
Cthulu tentacle >rape?
Yes please.
In all seriousness, you can imagine the mass of strings heading towards a central place like a portal or something and spreading out through the other side
And this faggot is back too. We've missed your constant bitching.
Never been gone, just watching the punishment roll and answering a self evident question. Don't look at me when the problem is so obvious it has to be spoonfed.
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I want to help Gilmglam with her autism wrong on purpose so she ends up a perfect wife.
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>playing DA:O and SOM makes me wish we had green where anon takes over equestria.
Playing what?
Popped is back!
One of them is Dragon Age origins I'm guessing, no idea what SOM is
Dragon age origins and Shadow of mordor
>Crystal Heart starts spinning progressively faster each day until around the middle of February
>Portal opens
>Many strings that stretched far into the sky redirect to flow through the portal due to path of least resistance or some shit
>Cadance can't see anything because of the sea of red weaving through the empire
>Crystal ponies think their Princess has gone blind
DnD stallion group that invites Twilight or other nerd mare for a session?
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>It's Popped
He's a little bit of our thread mascot, when you think about it.
>"I put the 'reee' in RGRE!"
Woke Dragon Age game didn't have my interest, but Shadow of Mordor is bretty gud
Now the whole family is here.
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>inb4 muscle wizard
He kinda reminds me of Bubsy now that you mention it. Except you replace the puns with autistic reeeing
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>not playing chaotic evil
>not showing the mares how it's done
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What ho
That is fucking magical.
Eh, it's his fault for fucking up and not praising lord Kek, don't fuck up and you avoid jail.
>he thinks we need Hasbro for moar pony
Thankfully, not all Anons are as faggoty as you : >>34019408
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You know, with how crazy the EQG world is, I can totally see this happening.
I imagine first contact, and the reunion of Sunset and her beloved pet would be quite touching, and who else is better suited to be liaison between species than another alien herself?
Welcome back Popped! I'm glad you're feeling better and I hope you continue to improve. Thanks for the update. I look forward to reading the next one.
>red string binding two soulmates together
What part is confusing you, exactly?
The comic is that an alien, that happens to look like a yellow spotted gecko, transferred its consciousness into an Earth gecko to observe Earth and its people, and was subsequently raised with love as a pet.
It then goes back to it's real body when its Earth one dies, and tells its compatriots about how wonderfully it was treated by humans.
That isn't...that wasn't even relevant to the post you linked. What kind of autistic tangent did you go on to post that?
>tfw you will never have 2 dozen foals with this horse
>Tfw ponk will never somehow time it so that you have a birthday every two weeks
>tfw Applejack will never say that they really are related, since only an Apple can be as fertile
>tfw Ponk will never be the bestest mother ever
>gecko-alien n°2 spawned in chinkland
>got slowly boiled alive because pain make the meat taste better
... fuck I need to stop going on LiveLeak, I can't watch something wholesome anymore without having reality burst in my head and ruin everything.
Because the imagine in that post has Sunset's pet, and seriously, the post itself was about them buying said pet as their mascot.
It's not that large a tangent.
Its a jump from, oh this pet has a silly name on a game Anon knows to, fucking space reincarnating lizards on a spaceship.
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>Camera pic
>Each of the flower sisters have something that scares them more than anything
>For Roseluck, it's Anon
>For Daisy, it's Spike
>For Lily, it's cameras
>She's convinced that they steal the soul of whoever gets their picture taken
Frank Burns or this one a different anon?
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Pretty sure it's Frank Burns-non.
Welcome back, Popped. Interesting stuff, and it's good to have you back.
Hey, it's EQG, and it's Anon. Things tend to spiral out of control.
>Anon looks Metal Gear Ray up and down, mostly up as the giant gecko is a good couple heads taller than him.
>Sunset is standing nervously net to him, as silent as the crowd standing around them, holding their breath as this moment will determine the fate of humanity.
>No one quite understood why the aliens requested these two teens to appear before them, but it's not like they were in any position to deny the request, what with the massive star ship hovering over their capital.
>"So..." the alien begins, lip twitching upwards. "Sunset ever beat the Nameless Queen in Dank Soles 3? I remember her being stuck for weeks on that fight."
>Anon chuckles and shakes his head.
>"Nope, she gave up and went to playing Suckiro as soon as it came out."
>"Hey! I'll go back to it as soon as I'm done with Suckiro!" Sunset defends. "I just wanted to start the new game from Where Software while it was still fresh! It brings in more views."
"Sure thing, honey," Anon says with a role of his eyes as he points at her with a thumb. "This girl, eh, Ray?"
>His smile fades some as his brow crinkles.
"Hey, is it okay to call you that still? I mean, it's not your real name, right?"
>The lizard chuckles itself.
>"Well, my true name is HISS-SS-HSS-*SPIT*, but I think Ray will be more convenient for now... It's good to see the two of you. I missed you."
>Anon bites his lip, making a sound in the back of his throat before suddenly lunging forward to hug the tall alien.
"I missed you too, Ray!"
>There's a collective 'Dah..." from the crowd and even aliens as Sunset joins in for a tear-filled group hug.
>You know, maybe this won't end in the conquering of Earth and enslavement of the human race.
>2 dozen
Not going for the two bakers dozen
D'awww, that gave me a heart boner Anon. Now I want a one-shot of that.
>implying you could stop at 2 dozen
>implying she'd let you stop at 2 dozen
This mare is going to single-hoofedly ensure the Pie Family Reunion is at least twice as big as the Apples'.
She'd look better if she wasn't wearing a bikini bottom on her head.
This horse was genetically engineered, from fate, natural selection, and by the hand of some great creature, to have as many human children as possible. If you're not fucking babies into this horse every single night so that there's loads of baby alicorns running around the castle there's no hope for you.
Welcome back, friend.
I think the action scene turned out pretty well and was worth the wait.
>Anon deliberately manipulates Glimmer into becoming a perfect OGR housewife
>Anon deliberately helps Glimmer's autism wrong because he genuinely doesn't like her
>human children

>after a few generations of cross species procreation, the definition of 'human' was officially changed to include homo sapiens and equus sapientes pretty sure thats wrong google translate but whatever
Because extreme sexual dimorphism is fun.
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The story that pic came from is weird. That right there is Rarity's daughter, and they fucking HATE each other.
Huh, well alright. How's the story otherwise?
Ehh, I never read very much of it. It's big - it has a bunch of different stories and its own 'verse, and I usually like Rarity and so the way the author makes her into a huge cunt (searches for her daughter for 15 years then immediately disowns her after some cultural misunderstanding, then refuses to do anything other than be a huge bitch and doesn't think anything that happened is her own fault) kinda turns me off.
That's a shame. The art is good at least.
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>All this talk about area 51, hopefully alien waifu's come and take out the roasties.
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>tfw no sweet, thicc horse woman to snuggle up with every night while she is the most toxic piece of shit online playing her horse video games
I'm now wishing I didn't delete all those female sangheili pics I had.
Where'd you get them from in the first place? Asking for a friend.
A tumblr that I can no longer access because tumblr is shit and locked nsfw pages unless you have an account.

Fucking faggots.
>There's a new villainess in Canterlot City, and it's up to Sunset and her friends to take her down.
>Anon A. Miss uses an advanced suit of armor, and makes it her duty to terrorize the city and its heroes on a weekly basis.
>The most the heroes ever manage is to thwart her plan and send her flying away with a "I'll get you next time, heroes!"
>Unable to stop her, Sunset and friends set about trying to find out her alternate ego.
>They think, based on the name and the whole incident surrounding it, that it has to be someone with connections to the school, but no girl matches that build.
>Tall, wide shouldered, and with huge knockers.
>Not to mention the brains to build the suit.
>It's Rainbow that points out Anonymous as a potential connection, seeing as he's the smartest kid in school, but looking into his records reveals no sisters or female cousins.
>Meanwhile, Anon watches with a smirk as the girls try to find out the secret identity of Anon A. Miss.
>He tweaks his suit of armor, making repairs, and replacing the two major energy cells housed in the chest.
>They're big, and take up a lot of space, but it was his genius idea to model the compartments after big boobs.
>Is it gay to pretend to be a female villain?
>Will anyone ever catch onto the strange truth?
>He highly doubts it.
>Everyone's looking for an Amazonian, not tall, lanky Anon in a bulky power suit.
More stupid prompts!
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Reminder that nothing makes you cum harder than a horny hyoo-man. Get one while you can before their dumb woman grow the wiser

-Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, 20XX
It's shit.
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>princesses make contact and open up diplomatic talks, causing quite the stir
>also VERY obviously start husband hunting almost immediately
>vehemently deny it whenever questioned, even while unabashedly leering at a nearby member of the security team of the male persuasion that one time in Celestia's case
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>into becoming a perfect OUR housewife
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>"Princess, please! You're causing a situation! There's news crews right over there!"
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Imagine what Luna would get up to, still having mannerisms and ways of thinking a thousand years in the past.

They'd both be a lot more uninhibited already since they're not dealing with their own little ponies.

>"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch your name Agent...?"
"Anonymous, ma'am."
>"Agent Anonymous, of course. It's still so strange to me that the females of this world would allow a virile young male to risk his life in such a dangerous position."
"You don't have any men in your security detail back home, ma'am?"
>"Oh, heavens no. There are so many more important things for colts to be doing."
>"Would you like me to show you what those things are, Agent Anonymous?"
"Uhh... I..."
>"You look uncomfortable. Are you uncomfortable, Agent Anonymous?"
"Very much so, ma'am."
>"I think it would be best for both of us if I made you more comfortable, Agent Anonymous. One can't be expected to do one's duties if one isn't fully relaxed, after all."
>"Sister, the press conference started five minutes ago. Please stop trying to fellate the Secret Service."
Stupid prompts? Hmm...
>Elfnon and his sister, Misstery come to Equestira and start to fit right in.
Twilight especially is interested in their elfish magic, and ponies are wildly impressed with their amazing archery skills, the two often putting on shows where they pull off impossible shots.
>They're apparently fraternal twins and are a lot alike, which, while charming, has caused some issues.
>Elves are very hard to tell apart, gender-wise, and it's a common occurrence for ponies to mistakes one for the other.
>Add onto that some romantic feelings, and ponies are starting to question their sexuality on the regular.
>Rainbow flies up and slaps Elfnon's ass.
>"Hey good looking, you up for hanging out today?'
"Ouch, Dash!, that stung! And I'm Misstery, for your information."
>"Oh... ah, sorry."
So did I win? Is it more shitty?
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Still think its some bs that you wind up having your protag get gas lighted into working for the bag guys at the end. I get that you have to keep in canon with the movies as depicted, but come on.

If there was ever a man that needed a pony to pet it'd have been Tailon.
M8, Tumblr purged ALL NSFW stuff like seven months ago. Their content filters were too inept to keep a pedo ring off the site, so they deleted almost 10% of the entire website to make it easier and spun a mile of yarn about being a safe platform. IIRC it’s been hemorrhaging money for a while now, and Yahoo might have to shut it down in a year, maybe two.
Good, I'll be glad when that septic pit is shut down. They'll flood to twitter and deviantart and other secondary septic tanks and we won't hear any more about safe words and trigger warnings because nobody as as fucking ridiculous as tumblr is.
Think Sunset would also call out the other girls online for not having a bf? Maybe brag a bit about having a colt that loves to lick her puss?
I didn't bother getting it with the gay character being one of the not muslim race, on top of the other shit in it. So the story is nothing I know about. 2 was better and the only one I actually played. Elf girl a cute.
One is basically you go murder a bunch of mooks and some made up mooks that is using the big bad as a stand. Then with elfbro decide that since the problem was caused by rings you should work together to make ANOTHER RING!

Two was neat, but had a bunch of weird sidequests involved with some big spider and making said ring realizing that you instead can't/aren't powerful enough to kill the big bad so you have to stall him endlessly until someone comes up with a way to kill said big bad.

Course by the time you figure that out the damned knife ears had betrayed you because your protag wasn't willing to tempt fate or something thus the endless wars to stall until the end. Elf girl a hoe and another classical reason why mares are better.
Gabby likes either bottom or top so that's good.
I've only gotten about a fourth of the way through 2, but I miss the Gondorian Sergeants popping in to save my ass like in Act 1. There's just something hilarious about a man following Talion halfway across Mordor waiting for the moment he can stab an uruk and deliver the one-liner he's been saving for weeks.
>It's one of Anon's old banana hammocks
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>Cum on your waifu's face
>Some lands on her snoot
>Try not to laugh as you watch this happen
>Not fucking the commie out of her like the corporations fuck consumers
>This but Equestria.
>Stallions have cocks.
>Mares have bigger ones.
>Dying is what landed Anon in this hell to begin with.
>Surely dying again will take him somewhere else.
>He'd even be happy going back to Earth at this point.
That would work on me.
>>He'd even be happy going back to Earth at this point.
>rejecting futaquestria
What a faggot
Short answer? It's bad.
Long answer? It's baaaaaad.
Full of convoluted shipping triangles, OoC character moments, and blatant fan wankery
Wouldn't the RGRE equivalent be colts having tighter cunts than mares?
But that's already true for all males.
Do you not know what boy pussies are?
Back to /HHH/ foul beast
>Luna and Celestia both have feelings for Anon, and neither are willing to share.
>It's not the alicorn way, after all.
>Not mere mortals beholden by earthly laws, alicorns lay claim to a stallion to be there's, and there's alone.
>Anon rushes out onto the battlefield, arms waving frantically.
"Girls, girls, please! Put the weapons away! No one needs to be hurt!"
>"Fear not, fair Anonymous," Luna begins, not taking her hard eyes off of her sister. "For their shall be no pain. Her death will be too quick."
>"Bold words, little sister," Celestia fires back, twirling her golden halberd in her magic. "Remind me again, which of us was banished to the moon after our last battle?"
>Luna snorts, the aura around her twin sabers flaring.
>"I shall gift thine insolent tongue to our beloved on our wedding day, cur. Now, shall we begin?"
>"Yes, lets."
>Their duel auras lift Anon up and place him on the sidelines where Cadence and Shining sat.
>The former huffs and rolls her eyes.
>"Those two. They get like this whenever a new stud shows up."
"Aren't you worried," Anon asks just as the two immortals charge at each other with vicious war cries. "They plan on killing each other."
>"Don't worry," Shining comments. "They're just going to end up knocking each other out like always. Hey, you two want to do something?"
>Cadence watches her fellow princesses for a moment longer as they clash weapons. "Sure. How about I take you two out to a nice dinner? I heard there's a new Prench restaurant in Canterlot that's amazing."
>"Oh, Candy-poo, you spoil me."
"Uh... I guess, if you're sure they'll be fine."
>"They will be, now come on! I'll treat you both to a nice night out on the town, just the three of us and no crazy sisters."
>And so they leave to enjoy a nice meal.
>The battle wages for several hours before Luna and Celestia knock each other out.
>Around the same time Cadence seduces Anon into a passionate threesome with her and her husband.
>Because the Princess of Love's got game.
>got game
is that what the kids are calling a (admittedly third rate) god tier booty nowadays? silly little oneshot regardless
>inb4 reeing over "muh cuckshit"
>ywn just relax and have fun with shiny and cadence.
>ywn be the crazy uncle to flurry heart that spoils her rotten and gives her firecrackers.
Canonically, all the alicorns have tiny booties with Twilight beingh the exception.
It's weird, but I guess they were going for the slender=ethereal thing.
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>Canonically, all the alicorns have tiny booties with Twilight beingh the exception.

It tends to depend on the boarders and animators, but Celestia does tend to have 'dat ass.
Haven’t read it in years but from what I remember, Rarity’s daughter ended up accidentally transported to Earth as a foal, so she ended up being raised by humans. Decades later as an adult Equestria makes contact with Earth. Rarity, instead of being reasonable, starts acting crazy and demands her daughter be brought back to Equestria. She’s also not so secretly racist against humans IIRC. After that the story devolves into HFY as humans help ponies fight a war against the channelings
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>After that the story devolves into HFY as humans help ponies fight a war against the channelings
>Devolves into HFY
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>>"Sister, the press conference started five minutes ago. Please stop trying to fellate the Secret Service."
>Pinkie would love Cheese Sandwich.
>There simply wasn't a better stallion for the party mare.
>And every pony agreed.
>She would end up with him, and that was that.
>It was pretty much like destiny chose him for her, and who was she to go against destiny?
>Except... Anon.
>Sad sack Anon who was always moping around.
>He claimed that was just who he was, and he wasn't sad, but it was hard to believe, and so Pinkie made it her duty to make him happy.
>And that really was all she intended to do- be a good friend to the lonely human- because Pinkie of course belonged with Cheese.
>There wasn't just Pinkie Pie in her head, though, and that was becoming a problem.
>A part of herself usually buried very deep was rousing.
>It sensed a kindred spirit whenever Pinkie interacted with the solemn human, and it began to love him.
>Pinkamena hated Cheese Sandwich.
>He was loud, annoying, and all the things her dominant half was.
>The two would feed into each other's crazy if they got together.
>He'd only make life louder and more chaotic than it already was.
>Anon, however, was quiet and calm, like the surface of a pond on a still day.
>He was what Pinkie really needed- a yang for her energetic ying, and Pinkamena was determined to get him for them both.
>Screw destiny, she was getting herself a man.
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I want to dominate Rarity
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>you will never
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>Anons first encounter with Moondancer is at a table top game shop
>After some autistic screeching about the fake gamer colt and why won't anyone touch her vee-vee the two become frienemies
>They argue and shit talk about different versions of various games but things get especially bad when they start discussing which side would win a war
>Anon talks about nukes, drones, and various other armaments
>Moondancers arguments against any of these winning amounts to little more than but magic tho
>It gets so bad that the two try to LARP out what a combat experience between the two races might be like
>It ends about five minutes later with both of them out of breath, the light jog to the park being the most exercise either side had done in an entire month
>They did think far enough ahead to pack a lunch though, which both sides enjoyed while continuing to shit talk eachother

>anon comes back after a thousand years
>luna and celestia were ready
>and with the descendants of his 6 former lieutenants ready
>a millennia Fate planned for the return 'night terror'
>to finally get her story back on track

>anon breaks the narrative yet again
>the L'appel du vide despite being a degenerate part of his souls is still anon
>and with fate meddling with his mind and basically destroying anon's moral half created a vaccum in anon's very being
>and a creature not of equestria does play by equestria's laws
>it obeys the laws of nature
>and nature abhors a vacuum
>for ten centuries anon was alone with his thoughts
>unlike luna where only Nightmare moon was aware in her stead
>anon was the one who suffered

>for ten centuries he went sane,insane and back to sane again
>until his 'moral' half 'grew'' back
>the princesses were not greeted with the mad lord of terror
>but a man who has had his soul killed
I want to herd with Rarity and Sweetie, and have the little sister dominate the shit out of Rarity in the bedroom.
She still get to be the first impregnated (don't want the actual situation to be visible in public) - but behind closed door she would be our bisexual bottom bitch.
Hey I said it’s been years since I’ve read it. So maybe it’s better than I remember? I do remember it going into edgy grimdark territory a few times though.
>Go out to dinner with Shining and Cadence
>Feel rather uncomfortable - Cadence in particular is being very friendly with you in a way that implies she wants something to do with you
>An hour into your dinner, you can't stand it any more
>You tell them that while you're flattered, you aren't interested in "joining your herd"
>The two look at each other, bewildered, and then burst out laughing
>Cadence gently ribs you for being a bit presumptuous, and Shining jokes that his wife, as the Princess of Love, sometimes mixes that type of love up
>"There's platonic love, like between friends; there's romantic love, like between lovers; and there's so much more in between. Sometimes my dear wife here gets the type of love she expresses a little bit muddled, Anon. I promise you, we just heard good things about you from Twily and we wanted to see if the rumours are true."
>You feel properly embarrassed and offer to cover dinner.
>Shining waves off your concern and tells you that this is nothing compared to the time that Cadence mixed up "we're friends" love with "we're lovers" love back when she met the Element Bearers for the first time
>"Now, THAT was an awkward luncheon."
>You end up making regular friends with Shining and Cadence, and start foal-sitting Flurry Heart for them when the need arises
>Shining is a bitter and begins to act a bit passive-aggressive once he finds out that his kid's first words were "Unca Non", but he gets over it

Pic related: It's the picture Shining took of Anon holding Flurry Heart for the first time. Anon's worried he'll drop her, but Flurry Heart is just enjoying the attention.
I like this. Let’s keep it going.

>being trapped on the moon was like solitary confinement on nightmare steroids
>his stolen magic may have kept him alive, but the lack of oxygen in space meant sound couldn’t travel anywhere, so he couldn’t hear anything for a full millennia
>as mentioned before, the total lack of stimulation drove him sane, then mad, then sane again a repetitive cycle
>when he finally returns to Equestria, it is as an emotionless husk of a being
>his eyes are open, but there’s no life inside them
>he walks and talks but it’s more like watching a puppet than a person
>Anon expresses that he no longer has a desire to take over Equestria, or do anything else really
>The Princesses and the Mane Six are horrified
>Luna straight up breaks down sobbing at what she was indirectly responsible for
>Fate considers nudging him towards evil again but even she feels bad about how this all turned out
>she wanted to weave a legendary heroic tale of friendship, adventure, and magic
>not the tragedy of a stallion driven to tyrannical evil by a mare’s hubris, and then the death of his very soul over his millennia-long punishment
>Fate decides her original plan is unsalvageable at this point, and that things must change for the better
>the Mane Six all suddenly feel a huge sense of responsibility for the actions of their ancestors in leading to Anon’s current state
>they decide that they’re going to help Anon learn to feel again
I remember it being more about the standard retarded republican ideas stuff, and family is more important than literally everything, with the military coming in a close second.
>so he couldn’t hear anything for a full millennia

>A thousand years without sound
>The only thing to see is the gray soil around him and the planet overhead
>Nothing to taste
>Nothing to smell
>The second he lands on Equestria flips his shit because of the sudden sensory overload from EVERYTHING
I do not envy this Anon
>the only reason Luna and Celestia are even able to tell he’s back is by hearing his agonized screams as he runs away from civilization and towards the quietest place he can find
>Sibling herds
Is there a legal issue here? What's the general consensus in Equestria on this?
>general consensus in Equestria on this
The consensus is that they get access to dick, which make their social status largely above any non-stallion-having dikey mare.
Sisters herd and mother/daughter herd green have been sorta-common here. Especially the last one for the guaranteed awkwardness (generally as shorts tho, don't think we ever got a full story with that prompt).
Feel free to write one where it's somehow illegal, despite the shortage of stallion kinda implying an "any mare that can get into a herd, do it no matter what" mentality.
>although the human brain cannot run out of memory it does have a system of forgetting information to make room for more experiences
>Anon barely remembers anything about his previous life and his life in equestria due to the limits of the human mind

This on top of the sensory deprivation and general insanity would make it a bad time for all
It only starts getting weird when the male is directly related to any of the mares in his herd, and even then a sympathetic eye may just shrug and go "oh well" so long as the rest of the herd balances it out
So sister/sister and mother/daughter SHOULD be legally okay, whereas mother/son or brother/sister might get a bit dicey, possibly even more so than in real life since the low number of stallions puts a real bottleneck on the "depth" of the gene pool as it is, and that depth can't be sacrificed willy-nilly
I mean you could argue the magic he stole from Luna would help him with memory loss. If it could keep him alive on the moon for 1000 years then memory shouldn’t be too hard
>Herd with a young mare and her mother
>Have foals with both of them
>Try to navigate the confusion regarding whether the foals are legally siblings or if they count as uncle/aunt nephew/niece to each other
Dude, chill out, he's at least not fetishizing it like anthrofags, he's honestly doing good.
TF is shit period, and belongs in the trash, how its done is irrelevant.
>Full of convoluted shipping triangles, OoC character moments, and blatant fan wankery
Isn't that like, 85% of this trash fandom?
>It tends to depend on the boarders and animators, but Celestia does tend to have 'dat ass
>depend on the boarders and animators
Yeah, same for Cadence to Shining size comparison, like, even in the same episode Shining will be taller, then they're the same, then Cadence taller.
>hating TF, even as a story vehicle
I smell a closet TF fag
>Projects the open TF fag
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>You dislike something to a unreasonable sense
Yeah, I don't agree with him but uh... pic related.
I disagree to a certain degree, I respect your opinion but I feel as though it is a bit much. If the story were making Anon into a mare or a stallion with a ultra dick I'd agree completely, but this one is more about Anon growing up, not getting all the pussy or being alicorn teir overpowered.
Its TF and on principle it shouldn't exist outside trash or b. Doesn't matter how its dressed up.
Nah it's got a place here
Calm your autism, friend
Nigga, that TF-rant fag is just as bad as the trenchfag in his autism. He is unable to shut up about his opinions and just ignore things he doesn't like.
good thing the most he can do is impotently inform us that he doesn't like tf and hope that one whiny voice in a crowd of positive supporter will somehow convince Popped to stop writing.
Because cancer shouldn't be here, trenchfag is just retarded and a shitposter like TF trash.
What crowd? There are two shitposters egging it on and multiposting "support".
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kek yeah anyone supporting what you don't like are shitposters sure thing frank burns
you realize you arent actually gonna convince him to stop writing right?
>only two people can like what I don't like
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What the hell is TF short for?
Both human and ponies act completely retarded but the humans are praised for it.
Poorly written HFY sullies our noble race.
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>Hey I said it’s been years since I’ve read it. So maybe it’s better than I remember? I do remember it going into edgy grimdark territory a few times though.

I'm sure it sucks, I'm just against calling HFY a problem.
I see you left out Father/son
This, HFY isn't a problem, its when its written by a retard that makes it a problem.
Cuckshit be gone
Tight Flanks. It's what every mare wants on a stallion.

I like it. The sisters are going to kick themselves for missing out.

Huh. Could be interesting. Like a Pinkie variant of CC's "A Mix of Sparkles".

I'm all for herd with sisters and/or mothers & daughters.

They'd be both however the sibling relationship would take precedence since they have a common father.
>"Fuck. Did you guys always smell like a whole barn? Compost pile and all?
God, Torque was cute.
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She is a good pony that would take care of you Anon. She is essentially RGRE the pony.
She was cute, but she also sounded like she smokes a 1/2 pack a day.
>Frank Burns-non is back

Blame TF fags shitposting.
I thought it said black not back.
Well, he is acting like a nigger, so you're not quite wrong there.
HFY can be good, so long as it's nit Humanity Mary Sue teir.
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>HFY can be good, so long as it's nit Humanity Mary Sue teir.

Even Mary Sues aren't bad. Basically every trope is only bad when it's used badly.
Anon. You do know what a Mary Sue is right?
Yes, the newcomer who is, among other things, invincible, everyone adores them, and they're better than everyone at everything until they die making a heroic sacrifice. Named for Ensign Mary Sue in an ancient Star Trek fanfic.
I think he means Gary Stu's, which tend to on a whole, be better than Mary Sue's.
>so long as it's nit Humanity Mary Sue teir.
When has it ever not been Humanity Mary Sue tier?
>wow they're immune to magic
>wow their weapons attack faster than the speed of sound
>wow I'm so glad that our benevolent masters conquered us
I've never seen HFY work when there was more than two humans.
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I remember one that involved a xeno-historian going back through human history and wondering about the sheer amount of war and genocides in comparison to other space faring races and realised something.
Genocides, plural.
Turns out in this short story every other race had a singular culture in their distant past that successfully stamped out every other one.
The twist is that humans have so many genocides because we're so bad at actually carrying them out fully.
We're too empathetic, and soft and squishy and just want to be your friends.
To be fair could that even qualify as HFY?
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Would a pony with non-standard colors/fur patterns be less attractive for deviating from the norm, or more attractive for standing out?
Not able to post images right now for some reason, but is it the second one?
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That's the one, it's a neat take on the "All aliens are stereotypes" thing.
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>And here comes America pony!
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I want to turn a sad mare into a happy mare.
I remember reading something like that but horse related. The historian was a humaboo even though most of their history was raiding, killing and not at all ever trusting magic. Not even a little bit. In ancient times these raiders would even eat pones when their supplies dried up so they're something of a take mothers and fathers tell to their foals. The thing is, humans were still very much sprawling but small in number compared to Earth and locked away in their own kingdom, their boarder patrol armed to the teeth and more of the kill magic sympathizers first, ask questions later type. There are traders that sneak in to export dangerous contraband like coffee which is like liquid cocaine for smol pones.

Humans were really hammed up and defended but from the perspective of the humaboo historian/anthropologist. So it wasn't out of place. I kind of liked where it was going. Stopped with him trying to get through with the illegal coffee smuggling route so he could learn more and forgot about it until now.

If we're going by the fact that they were originally prey animals, less colorful the better, at least for earthponies and pegasai. The ones with more earthy tones and those creamy or white in color were more saught out because there's a chance their foals would blend in with nature better. Therefore not being spotted by predators. Large birds of prey have excellent vision when it comes to color. Most can see well more colors than humans so pegasai would need more tame sky colors to fit in. Unicorns are a wildcard because they mostly lived high atop mountainous areas. Birds of prey would still be a problem but they can hide within nooks and crannies and probably have better mobility than wolves a top sheer rock cliffs. Also the ability to discharge magic in a flashy way makes for good defense or at least distraction despite getting spotted or not.
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>If we're going by the fact that they were originally prey animals, less colorful the better, at least for earthponies and pegasai.
It honestly depends on circumstance, bright colours can also be utilized by prey animals as a big "Fuck off" signal.
Predators probably got the message to stay away from anything with a horn pretty sharpish after getting blasted off the mountainside for the umpteenth time.
Which would actually somewhat lead into the unicorns culture somewhat holy fuck.
>Strongest magical unicorns become leaders to gather around as they are simply the safest, which then exponentially grows as more horns are added to the group.
>Magical strength potentially carries through in families, or at the very least a chain of respect and obligation does.
>Relative safety from predators results in more time for civilisation building on the mountainsides.
>Differing magical strength along with the harsh conditions introduces a somewhat rigid system of social rules and etiquette, cant just blast somepony irritating off the mountainside as if they are a common leopard after all.
>Literally looking down on every other species from the top of the world, even the race that lives on fucking clouds.
Wasn't there one where Anon wasn't a Equestria human and the Equestria humans got pissed because they thought he was a traitor.
>Ponies see Anon's bright green color.
>Curious, doesn't look dangerous, no lazers.
>Watch him hunt.
>Sets up traps, or stalks, or hides until a animal is caught, all ways varying from the other.
>Has even been found patiently waiting by a lake with a stick and string until he somehow tricks a fish into attaching itself to it.
>Come to a conclusion.
>He's not brightly colored as a sign of "I'll fuck you up with my venom or strength!" It's a sign of "I'll out smart you and eat you!"
>cadance has issues distinguishing the differing types of love
i like thing
I think there was a prompt a few months back about towns having stallionless herds of mares who'd lost or been divorced by their stallions, and Anon was trying to convince one herd to let him be their stallion.
>An all too familiar voice rings out, "I thought you had my back T-"
Holy shit, is he a reincarnation too? The fact that his dream is set in equestria implies otherwise, but the cut off on the name makes me think it might be the dindu from the beginning of the story.

I might just be retarded though.
No, you're right.
I, and I'm sure others, have already assumed this my dude. Specifically when he wanted to meet Anon after school after Rarity explicitly called him Anon.
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On one hand, his name is Thunder so he could've just been cut off saying Thunder.
On the other hand, from the very first chapter.
>He grunts in reply, before groaning in pain.
>You suck at rescuing people.
>>You laugh together, yours’ a wet wheeze, his with far too much gurgling.
>>”I’d be better if your fatass laid off the fucking pies.”
From the latest update, specifically >>34027565
>You grunt in reply, before groaning in pain.
>You hear him sigh and laugh a little, “You suck at distracting ponies.”
>You laugh back a little pained
“I’d be better if your fat flanks laid off the pies.”, you reply
update for y'all

>You open the door
>Inside is a sprawling landscape of books, lining the wall and ascending for a decent while
>Down the main hall of books on the far wall is a few chairs surrounded around a fireplace
>You can see a book levitating in front of one of the chairs
>From here you can only see the name of the Author
>Albert Camel
>Fucking puns here you swear
“Twilight? Is that you?”
>The book quickly snaps closed, ”Anon?”
>Twilight turns around, sees you and quickly jumps out of her chair and walks over to you and Lesae
>She wraps you in a hug that you reciprocate
>”It's so good to see you! You're not hurt anywhere right? And whos this?” Twilight says, looking at Lesae
“Don't worry I'm fine, just the usual, no more poison joke like that first month.” you say with a chuckle. “And this is a friend that I met in the forest, I think she’d rather introduce herself to you personally”
>Lesae takes a step forward, releases her transformation, puffs her tuft out and says, “I am Princess Lesae, soon to be Queen Lesae of the Everfree, it is a pleasure to meet you, your grace,” Lesae says with a bow
>”O-oh don't worry about bowing, we don't do that here!” twilight says flustered. “But why are you here? Usually, it's your mother who takes care of trades and things like that, is she okay?”
>Lesae’s face twists into one of sadness and anger, “My mother...has fallen. The Hive has been destroyed.”
>Twilight gasps and puts a hoof to her mouth, shocked beyond belief, “By Celestia… what caused the Hive to fall so quickly?”
>”Is it alright if we sit down? The story is a tad long and I'd rather be more comfortable before I tell it”
>”Of course, come this way,” Twilight says, walking over to the fireplace, sitting down and throwing another log onto the fire with her magic
>Both you and Lesae sit into the comfortable chairs, sinking into the fabric slightly
>Lesae turns to you ”Anonymous, are you sure you wish to be here? I understand you aren't most stallions but it is rather...depressing.”
You shake your head, “nope, I'm staying, I've been curious about your state ever since you wandered into that clearing, and id rather know what I might be up against since I'm basically in the middle of this now.”
>Lesae chuckles, “Of course, I understand perfectly.” Lesae takes a deep breath and releases it. “It all started that morning.”
Thats gonna be it for now, my weekend is packed and im sorry for another small update
ill try to make Lesaes stry one big update so watch for that!
I love these pre-historic/pre-harmony pony concepts.
Personally think it gives more freedom in terms of world building because the show never really deals with those times.
You have other ideas my dude? I do like the idea that Humans and Ponies used to work together or even were onthe same planet.

Reason we don't see them in the show could be caused by Crystal Empire shenagins of being a lost civilization that was too full of hubris and lead to their own downfall.

Or as the brownie bites put it; a great migration of munching ponies drove the poor farming humans out of a jobband life from their grazing. Damnable cute equines and their insatiability appetites!
>"Anon, did you know that it's good luck to eat an alicorn out?"
>"It's supposed to bring you fortune, a long life, all of the kitchen utensils that you could ever want."
>"It says so in Sunny Skies "The Totally True Tale of The Tallest""
>"I think we should test it out."
>"I also think we should see if there's any magical properties in hyoo-man sperm."
>"And Spit."
>"And those hands of yours. I can think of several potential magical anomalies with those puppies."
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>>"Anon, did you know that it's good luck to eat an alicorn out?"
"No Twilight, I did not know that. Now get out of the bedroom so me and your teacher can test that little theory of yours. In depth."
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>tfw alicorn cum really does have magical properties that are beneficial to humans
>Oddly enough, only humans it seems
>Like for the majority of species on Equus, alicorn cum is somewhat poisonous
>tfw this cum is also delicious and nutritious; almost a superfood for humans
>tfw a lickeroo a day will keep the doctor away
>tfw a few lickeroos will help your eyesight, clear and smooth skin, heal wounds and scars, help you focus, even fix high blood pressure and breathing issues
That reminds me of LaP's story where Twi is way to eager to observe Tia and Anon getting it on (or a named character, as LaP put that story on his FimFiction and not in pastebin after he put it here).

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Still mad about this, fim sucks ass, and Anon is top tier. It should be on the pastebin like its supposed too.
Eh, honestly I'll take what I can get. I may bitch about it but it's honestly a small inconvenience to me.
Fimfic is great for stories, what are you talking about?
And it's an unnecessary inconvenience.
Reality, what are you smoking?
>Better cholesterol levels instead of godtier super powers.
What powers you ask? How about the power of flight?
That do anything for ya?
How about the power to kill a yak from 200 yards away, with mind bullets?
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>on the ponyboard for escapist fantasies
The best pony board for escapist fantasies, bar none.
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I'll take the wings, thanks.
I kind of like the idea of it just giving mundane benefits. For healthy skin you could eat some carrots or having an alicorn cum all over your face.
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>Not wanting to gain powers that are better than the horse's you just sucked.

>When a new crisis emerges you must gain the powers of all alicorns to defeat the terrifying threat.
>you must gain the powers of all alicorns
I'll do it with Twi, Tia and Luna. Maybe Candyass if the threat is big enough, but no way in hell am I touching a foal.
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>implying you'll arrive in the same time frame
>or even timeline
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Oh right, the squirt is one too. Whoops.
>All alicorn's of legal age in the clause
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>Implying you'll arrive
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>tfw dead on arrival
Or your body just isn't equipped to deal with such a large environment change and wastes away out of sight.
>Gravity, oxygen, sunlight, etc levels too low or high
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>Okay, you two in silk panties is beyond hot, but Twilight is going to be pissed that you wrecked her diorama.
>after celestia so rudely informed twiggles of certain equines of zebrawean persuasion she decided to get to the bottom of it
>imagine her horror when she learned it's ziggers all the way down
Those are some big HONKING wings, I wonder if other pegasi get wing envy?

On another note, wasn't there some thread that was a excedingly long CK2 type of story that involved work with Flurry Heart to maintain Equestria during a time of trouble or something?
As much as everyone gives flak for Twi not liking Zebra, I really like Princess Zebra, she's pretty looking.
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>Enter Twilight in a cute little lab coat.
>"C-Cadance, Celestia how could you?"
>Both alicorns freeze as they see the pony they callously betrayed in the doorway.
>Oh boy, here it comes.
>"-get started on KAIJU ALICORN PANTY WRESTLING without me?!"
>She rips off her coat to reveal her also in silk panties and stockings.
>With a Marely whinny, Twilight tackles her mentor, knocking her off Cadance and into the reproduction of Canterlot's mountain, shaking the miniature kingdom on top.
>Not one to be bested so easily, Celestia recovers, rounds on her pupil and charges in a blink of an eye.
>You watch flabbergasted, as the three scantily clad ponies tear up the small scale set of Equestria before you, knocking pieces of houses and trees everywhere in the carnage.
>You feel yourself falling into a trance, unable to process bearing witness to shapely, barely contained rears straining against fabric as their owners battled over what must have been months of intricate diorama work.
>You are knocked out of it soon enough by the royal Canterlot voice behind you.
>Turning around, you see a furious Princess of the night also wearing silk undergarments galloping toward the fight.
>Like Twilight before her, she takes to the air, but this time leading with a savage elbow drop into the pile of pony wreckage.
>Okay, now you're kinda getting into it.
>You pull up a chair as close as you dare to observe this interesting phenomenon.
>If you weren't totally invested before, you are now as Cadance suplexes Twilight into a lake, splashing all four with water.
>Cheering from the sidelines, you feel a presence as an unseen voice speaks beside you.
>"It gets even better."
>"Also, Not rgre enough."
fuck even without the lewd I'd pay to see that. you think spike would be enough of a bro to take bets on the winner each week?
He may be a small effeminate dragon, but he's no faggot.
Of course he would.
not enough of bro-tier spike nowadays. for being a dragon just starting to get into his adolescence he's got a surprising amount of insight and wisdom some days. i can see anon coming in and playing cards with him when equestria's cartoon logic or the rgre gets too much for him every now and then
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By hanging out with him would we inadvertently turn him manlier?
Some would see this as a positive but dude has enough going against him as it is.
I fear we might make him appear gay to the populace trying to act like a mare.
Although with Rarity's dyke personality it might make him more attractive somehow.
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Zeebs can actually be pretty kind and caring despite what others may think. Every herd should have a cute zebra mare
What type of scenes would you think fit for a bro tier spike and anon dynamic? I was thinking something cool like their ogre and obilettes that the boys have as their nights out. Although Discord coming in might make Anon feel a touch threatened by this ass hole who comes charging in to what was a normal dudes thing. Or even calling Discord out on breaking rules with oh so realistic rendition of OnO.

Too bad Anon, Big Mac and Spike can't have a nice ol' fashioned BBQ or something, there something manly about having meat on the grill, a bonfire nearby roaring in the evening and maybe a drink or two to enjoy the night with your friends.

Think they have like vegan steaks or something? If Fluttershy can make vegan treats for a snake in the shape of a cookie then making a damn steak that's tasty shouldn't be too much to ask is it?
Seriously though Fluttershy what the heck, why you denying animals their right to their instincts?
Well, I figure Flutters has no real issue with meat, as she has fed her fishie friends to her other furred friends before.
>"My, my... which Princess do I have to personally thank for guiding you into my humble Boutique?"
"Good morning to you too, Rarity."
>"Has anypony ever told you that your voice sounds like honey and Elysium all rolled into one? I'd love to hear you say my name over and over~"
"I... wow. Hey, listen-"
>"-I could listen to your angelic voice all day, darling."
"Uh-huh. Seriously, I'm here for my appointment."
>"Perfect! Is it for a fitting? Because that outfit looks becoming on you."
"Aww, thank yo-"
>"Then again, if I were on you, I'd be-coming too."
>"Please, come in! Sit down, you must be exhausted; you've been running through my head all morning."
"...Are you feeling alright?"
>"Alright? Darling, I've never felt better. My heart's been beating the steps to a tango ever since you walked in; and foal, I need you to become my dance partner."
"I don't dance."
>"Ah, then I can teach. We'll start with something simple: the horizontal tango."
"...Heat hit you early this year, didn't it?"
>"I've already locked the door while you were distracted."
"And that, darlings, is how I met your father."
>Your horn glows and you gently close the your photo album.
>Or, as your husband so coltishly puts it, your book of memories.
>Your two foals, both fillies, snuggle up against you as you slide the album back onto the bookshelf where it belongs.
>It sits among wedding photos, and first date snapshots, and pictures of you laying exhausted and sweaty (but still fabulous) in a hospital bed with two bundles of joy suckling their first meals from your teats
>The start of your beautiful relationship with your husband, Anonymous, started in a way you admit you aren't exactly proud of.
>Normally, a well-raised mare introduces the idea of sex slowly, as not to make her stallion uncomfortable.
>In addition, stallions who were too eager for sex were often not worth pursuing.
>Though the start was unconventional, you have never once regretted seducing your janefilly human.
What we need to do is either import some zebra friends that wanna live with the ponies.
Or the more fun way of having Anon pair with Zecora and make couple baker's dozen of foals.
Apparently she's changed her mind about that as more recent episode has her run ragged while teaching predators that they don't need to eat prey animals and can instead eat some yummy tasty carrots or other vegan things.

She was making a wolf pupper try to eat carrots Anon, CARROTS! Why would you do such a thing to a poor puppy?
I got some.

Yeah, that's one of my horsecannons. Unicorn ability being genetic, or at least they thought they were, that's why in the hearths warming play they seemed to have a very prominent caste system which really made them stand out from the other races. Meanwhile, Pegasai had a big emphasis on meritocracy, and probably pushed their weaker ones off to the side, maybe throwing them out altogether or using them as rocbait depending on their degree of uselessness. Earthponies were way more lax and were the exact opposite of that, pushing the weaker ones up and having a general stronger sense of communal herd. They had to. All hundreds of kinds of air and landbased predators and monsters alike were all on them. Being down in flatter lands often out in the open when they figured out agriculture.

I had a bin with some of this stuff written. I whould go back and flesh it out more.
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>not a couple of hundred of them
If this is part of the china leaks (fuckin' chinks), then I haven't seen it yet so I'll ignore that ep when it appears.
I think dragons eat meat in equestria, I don't think it's ever been shown though.
If done right, I think you could have a pretty good bro relationship with spike even if he keeps talking about how tacky that stallions clothes were.
I think what he needs more of though is to hang with other dragons and lava board n shit, he won't get that from other species and should learn his own culture more and maybe get a girlfriend he can actually impregnate
I remember there being a thing called Husbando Snatchers that really pissed of earthen and unicorn alike, where pegasi just swooped down and stole mates as they were want to do and made them into cloud mates where the nonwinged couldn't escape because they were up so high. That was a neat if disturbing idea.

Would Lions be considered kings of the savannah or be considered tyrants that feasted on their terrified populace with iron claw and strange babboon magic?

It is, but it's an okay episode. We actually get to hear Angel talk for once which was neat.

Ember was rather pretty when she was first introduced but then Spike pretty much showed how nice he was with that whole sceptor business.

I feel like if Spike had a hobby that was semiproductive that Anon could join in on that would be a cool scene to imagine. Something of value like making jewelry or crafting something from gold or other precious metals. Reminded of that one picture of Rarity the Smith with a rather metal looking set up as she was doing an order for some LARP community or something.
I feel that the problem that constantly resurfaces with bro-spike imo is that as soon as the big bro element is introduced the RGRE element is dropped completely.
I don't think I've seen any writer treat Spike as someone with reversed gender roles except for a throwaway line mentioning that 'of course he knows how to cook, he's a colt'.
You can have a little bro who doesn't immediately emulate everything that Anon does, making him into just mini firebreathing anon. Maybe have them at odds a bit. Maybe Spike doesn't appreciate how Anon tracks dirt in after he's cleaned up, or how Anon seems to completely ignore manners.
Besides Spike just being upset that Anon ""steals"" Rarity because Anon's an adult doesn't have to be the only friction. Maybe have Spike be upset that Anon seems to treat the mare with near reverence, as Spike sees it, because his big bro that he loves to brag about being as rough as any mare is doting on Rarity to a stepford husband degree and it freaks him out. Maybe have him suspicious of Rarity because of how much Anon changes when he's around her.
Always hugging, kissing, complimenting. Anon going from loud and boisterous ribbing with Rainbow or throwing a stallion out of the boutique, literally, for flirting, to gently brushing Rarity's mane on her fainting couch would seem like something akin to mind control.
In a world with canon mind control.

I don't know. Just seems like the male half setting isn't taken advantage of outside of sassy Caramel, basic bitch Flash Sentry, or Big Mac who also suffers from the same problem as Spike.
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this one?
How long are we talking about Anon being with the Sparkles to be considered a bro? I was imagining something like Twi did a thing and now they have to care for an evolved monkey. However the Evolved Monkey actually seems pretty chill and hangs out with Spike more often than not because these ponies are crazy.

Some other things that I think you could write about would be sibling bickering or even rivalry over whose the best helper or something to that effect. Even for an Anon raised amongst the Sparkle family I could see that Anon might have gotten used to be the gopher/responisble child out of the Sparkle family and so Spike wants to help, but he can't due to his age and that leads to resentment that slowly builds up or something.

I remember writing a small bit about a twin of Spike that was meant to be a written account of how differently the two dragons were from pony raised Spike to lost feral like child that eventually comes back to ponyland. Called him Thorn since I thought it clever to keep in the theme of Spike's name and other dragon names, though I don't know how Garble fits in that...
Tfw you just reminded me of that one really sad prompt based off that where, the mare couldn't lift Anon off the ground and he reverse raped her only to find out she wasn't actually fixing to do that to him in the first place.
Ayyyye that's the one, the expression makes Rarit look like a man and it weird, but it makes sense and has safety first written across it. Though it's still rather bad ass to see her do such a thing with the forge and stuff.
The Chad Rarity
>Rarity loves everything in the world of fashion.
>She may focus her own considerable talents on dresses, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have an appreciation for hats, shoes, slacks, or even more distant forms of the craft like home decor and set design at a nice play.
>It's why, one day, on a friendship mission assigned to her by the Map, she found herself enamored by a work of fashion that stole her breath away.
>She and Rainbow Dash were tasked with helping a newly formed group of guards at a town come together and fight as a unit.
>What really caught Rarity's eye, however, were the guards' armor.
>Celestia and Luna's guards wore some beautiful armor to be sure, but these suits.
>These were works of art on another level.
>Whenever she got a chance, she drank in every detail of them.
>Each a perfect combination of form and function, and looking closely, there were not two pieces exactly the same.
>Each fitted to their wearer perfectly, they also sported small details that fit the pony's personality.
>Rarity couldn't help but blurt out a request to know who had created such works of art as soon as the group were true friends ready to fight side by side.
>Apparently, back when the town guard was first founded, a couple of members ended up saving a strange creature from a wild beast, and in return, he offered to outfit them with the best armor he could craft.
>The town blacksmith was no armor smith, and when the stranger offered to do the work she was hesitant to perform herself, the only payment being that he be allowed to make use of her tools, she was glad to let him do it.
>The strange stallion had left town after his work was done, and so Rarity went to the smith to learn more.
>There, she heard even more about the stranger, and with how much the smith praised his work and skill, explaining her amazement as she watched him work, Rarity found herself more determined than ever to meet this strange stallion.
I chuckled/10
anonymous writefag here, any RGREqG prompts to pull me out of a writer's block?
Anon fucks a pony's ponut.
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Big teat energy. I love it
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A cute
>mares wrestling
>not rgre enough
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Did I hear females wrestling?
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how can any other race humans included compete
Remember. Looking into her heart eyes is legally consenting to marriage.
uhhh anon fucks all the teachers/staff
but this time acts like he doesnt want to and is bored
>The boys go up to Anon to learn to walk the walk and talk the talk.
>He's so mature and comfortable in his own skin that his exccentric female-like behavior seems like a bar to be reached.
>Enter some kind of rivalschools intrams. Either cheerleading, volleyball, or some other manly intram thing.
>Anon and the lads do some real fun bullshittery and upset the balance of RGRE in a way that fucks all involved.
>Like them being less catty and reserved, and striving towards a noble goal of self improvement actually kind of scares girls off who think something's up and if they bite that's just asking for a rape accusation and several me toos.
>So they actually have to be the ones to gently initiate it in a way that doesn't set off alarm bells.
>They rethink and try to set things right by grabbing shovels and digging back to rock bottom.

>Or you can make several pee-pees hard by having a nerd Anon get bullied and stepped on by meanshim.
man, we have thousands of them in the prompt bin. I'd like to dig through it for you, but it would take me hours to burn through all 8 of the sub-pastebins.
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Mild mannered reporter Anon working for the school paper.

You can have Anon date any one of the humane 7, or have Anon write in a journal recounting the days event trying to live like all the males in RGREqG, or Anon being catcall at everywhere he goes to work at any job.
Treat Anon as the most sexy male alive. Instead of the hot Amazonian Babe that guys drool over, it's the Spartan Stud that girls drool over in RGREqG. Wearing armor showing off his muscles, boxers or whatever attire that's hugging the bulge and making it bounce, and also buns that you flick bits that make them cheeks bounce.
>Spartan Stud
good name, totally won't be stealing it from now on
capeshit get out
1.Anon playing video games on stream or something equivalent to youtube. Something similar happened a few threads back like Sunset playing and Anon sleeping.
2.Anon reincarnate in RGREqG as a newborn with or without his memories of his previous life. Either with the Humane 7 Older/Little brother, the hot distance cousin, or step family member. Either something cute/funny.
3.Being a teacher that his students trying to hookup with one of the other teachers or principal. But this might work with an Elementary School instead of high school. Like the hot gym coach with the sexy teacher.
4.Or having a bad encounter with criminal underworld. Either Cute fluffy or Serious; however you prefer.I don't need to go in detail into this.
5.Having Anon thinking about his thoughts into a journal. Something major or minor so you'll have a couple of oneshots or a full story.
(5e.)Either being catcall by aggressive women or being felt up in a crowded area or both. Account it with a flashback to have the readers see it in action
>no bus full of neighponese salarymares to grope me
fuck this life
It's all good.
Tf shit get out.
>Alright, back of the bus was definitely a bad idea
>Fuck you outkast
>You ought to just park it up front by the driver
>She has to ensure order on the bus, you'll be sa-
>the driver's horn illuminates as you feel arms being forced to hold a newspaper out in front of you, faux reading
>what a pal, she's obviously giving you a buffer zone to avoid those lecherous gazes from mares in the back
>..aaand there's her magic grip on your dick
>you can't even read this ching chong horse newspaper either
>Equestria is just post apocalyptic earth
>Something something humanity built fallout esqu vaults to go into cryo
>Something something the laylines started activating and the new magic was too strong for humans to handle
>Something something female animals handled the magical mutations better and became the dominant gender
>Something something thousands of years later the magic evened out and isn't fucking toxic as hell anymore
>Something something purple smart finds the vault Anon is in
>Something something, something something
Replace leylines with nukes and Twilight with Celestia who was just a horse Anon had before being drafted and you got one of the more recent (as far as I recall) prompts.
>>Fuck you outkast
For fuck's sake, now I have to listen to the song.
Into what? A human?
That's just ol' Frankie. Mention reincarnation and sit back to watch the fireworks.
Don't acknowledge it, he already said it doesn't matter if the story is good or not, he is just autistic hate if TF.
>eyes are windows to the soul.
>emotions can be a tangible force in their world.
Can you even imagine being gazed at by someone who loves you so much you can literally feel it?
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Oh, Popped's biggest fan. Got it.
>Love brings comfort
>Joy gives warmth
>Hate burns
>Fear impales
>Can you even imagine being gazed at by someone who loves you so much you can literally feel it?
Can you imagine being them and looking into your eyes and seeing nothing?
Yeah basically. It may actually be autism or something.
That's why you have to do everything you can to make sure they know you love them as much as they love you.
>Looking into a mares eyes and feeling nothing.
Yeah good luck with that pal.
Even if that's true you'd trigger the friendship alarm within seconds of being in equestria.
More of mare looking into your eyes and seeing nothing, not neutral, nothing
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Just call it a day, dude.
>Blindnon in Equestria
>He doesn't even realize he's surrounded by ponies for like a month
>He just thinks this "everyPONY" business is just everyone around him being dumb larpers
>Whenever he touches one, he thinks these people he's staying with just have big weird dogs as pets
"Ha ha, Gary"
>All of the Anon clones are insane
>The original Anon is in stasis
>"What? I thought we were staring this ice cream."
>"You get a lick then I do. That way it's equal."
>"Actually, I'll tell you what. If you let me have this I'll let you play with my boobs."
>"You like fat tits, right, Anon?"
>Be Anon
>You know you say it often, but this is the last time you're letting Starlight buy you ice cream
>The goddamned busty communists
>I'll let you play with my boobs."
No wonder she's a loner, what kind of guy would want to play with some autistic neet's tits?
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>sometimes you just have to show these equestrians some heavy handed capitalism.
>ywn roll what you think is a big dog onto its back and aggressively rub its tummy, making its legs shake
>ywn make all the nobles monocles pop off as you make their Princess drool on the floor in the middle of the castle
>tfw you will never play the national anthem on one side of the room while Starlight plays the USSR anthem on the other side of the room
>tfw you will never charge each other--naked--while the two anthems are blasting, intent on converting the other to your idea of thinking
>tfw you've done this for two years without a winner
>"whosea good girl?"
[Unintelligible happy horse noises]
>in exchange for sharing the ice cream she bought, she'll let Anon play with her tits
She doesn't realize how capitalistic and one-sided this deal is, does she?
I guess you don't know this horse. She's more of a Stalin's communist
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>starlight gf
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No, actually. I can't.
horses doing horse things
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Even better, Anon is a hot school councelor who has to pull evil shim asside and out of class when she acts like a cunt. He genuinely cares and she starts developing a crush on him.
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>posting cutest waifu
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Appul love
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waifu and a song
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Apples! Apples! Apples!
>Fertility goddess Cadance
Now I want more of that prompt where Cadance's appearance changes based on who she gets with and Anon's fertility goddess Cadance meets up with Shining's regular beauty standard Cadance.
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Only if Anon's Cadence is also Gleaming shield's cadence.
Or Anon just completely replaced Shining although that's still kinda bad.

>Nightlight and Velvet are about to roll around in the proverbial and literal hay after a romantic evening out in the countryside.
>Get startled out of the mood by a giant crash and boom outside of the barn they're in.
>At the end of a dirt trail they find a pod of unknown metal with a baby inside.
>Decide to raise him as their own.
>A few years later they have Twilight.
No superman bullshit because that's boring, maybe he's just slightly magic resistant or something.
Better than having Shining. Gleaming is a cute.
Is it cuck if you wife swap with an alternate universe version of your wife?
>Nightlight swears he heard a scream through time and space as he bust a nut in a cleanex.
fuckin kek
What if mares treated new members to the herd the same way a house cat treats a new kitten?

>Be Anon
>Belong to a herd of you and two mares
>New mare is interested in joining
>Cautiously enters your house
>Your two waifus arch their backs and their fur stands on end
>They hiss at the new mare, who rolls onto her back and exposes her belly
>For the next month, the new mare cautiously stalks around the house while the other two mares aggressively sniff her and hiss at her seemingly at random
>The adjustment period finally ends when you spot your original two mares laying on top of the new one and grooming her mane
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I don't like cats though. I like fucking horses. I want them to bow their necks, whinny, stomp, preance back and fourth, push, and wheel around and kick if they get close.
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Post one of the best, top quality pics of your waifu you have.
>and kick if they get close.
Do foals accidentally kick their parents' shins when they're really young, and their horsey-instincts are at their peak?
>and wheel around and kick if they get close.

>Anon gets frisky with his waifu
>She's skittish and nervous because she's a horse, despite being the dominant gender in Equestria
>Anon rakes his fingers across his flanks and BAM
>Gets kicked in the let as thanks
>Anon grumbles about it later, and his stallion friends are bemused
>"I don't know what you expected, Anon. Don't spook her next time."
>This is just regular horsey behaviour for ponies, and everypony has a time in their life where they learn not to spook their waifu/husbando
I see something there. Keep going.
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This is why ponies are only good as food.
English, do you know it?
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The best
No, I don't think I can.

I wonder how they would feel when they look into my eyes and feel how horrified I am at the thought that they would waste such an emotion on me.
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>Even the spergy whiteknight mare who says all colts are kings gives up on you
It all comes tumbling down, tumbling down, tumbling down
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Gleaming a cute, wish we had more stories with her.
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Yes, and you bet momma will nip the shit out of them if they start doing it so they learn. Adult ponies still have horsey brains they just know what's polite and what isn't. Too bad Anon doesn't. Walking strait towards ponies and making himself look big by standing on his hind legs is seen as aggressive behavior. Reaching out to grab and pet them is also a big no-no but it makes it all the sweeter when he gets close enough to a mare that will put up with the way a predator instinctively acts and moves. Grabbing and touching the ears, which they use to listen out for other predators is also very alarming to pones who don't know how humans work.

This is my fetish. But she would probably be called a fucking dyke because bucking a forward stallion is something mares do if they're about to get dick but don't want it. If word got out that it was because she got spooked, it would be more tabboo in rgre. The proper way to handle this is to trip her up and pin her down for a good solid dicking.
Is this somehow relevant or?
stop spamming this faggot
>You've pretty much been accepted as Dinky's honorary uncle at this point, being Derpy's go-to foalsitter ever since the tyke took a shine to you.
>You, of course, don't mind at all, and refuse Derpy's bits whenever she offers to pay you for your time.
>Her amazing muffins she makes as thanks are more than enough.
>Plus, all the d'ah's the little filly manages to bring you help.
>The townponies tend to agree as they give you both plenty of them whenever they spot you at the park playing.
>More than one mare has commented on how fatherly you are, and others have made offers to make you one officially after a night out at the bar.
>You tend to laugh this off, especially when Dinky comes up, cheeks puffed and horn sparking, telling them to keep their hooves off of her mommy's coltfriend.
>No matter how many times both you and her mother explain that you aren't dating, she just waves you off and says it'll happen eventually.
>Derpy's blush is always a sight to see.
>Things have been odd lately, though, as Derpy has grown quieter these last couple weeks while Dinky has been searching for a gift for her sister.
>Derpy has been busier than usual at work, with one pony being out of town and another moved away, and as much as she would prefer to be with her daughter, she needs the money, and can't exactly refuse the extra work, anyway.
>She says it's a miracle she still has a job with how many mistakes she makes, and she doesn't want to push her luck.
>You don't mind, and help Dinky pick out a gift.
>Everything she pick doesn't seem like a good one for a mare like Sparkler, though.
>Dinky keeps picking foal toys, and just looks you you funny when you suggest more mature gifts.
>"No, sis wouldn't like a hat, Anon, and that one's too big, anyway."
>You decide not to press, figuring Sparkler won't mind regardless.
>It's the thought that counts, after all.
>A couple days later, a frantic Derpy is asking you to watch Dinky again, the mare almost in tears as she stammers that she had the day requested off, but had made a big mistake the day prior, and was being threatened to make up for it.
>You don't get all of it, but you understand that she needs help, agree.
>Dinky is solemn when you arrive, barely perking up upon seeing you.
>She can't believe her mommy would miss such an important day.
>Yo try to comfort her, telling her that Mommy wants to be there, but she just couldn't be.
>Derpy said she'd be back by a little after noon, anyway, so she won't miss much.
>Just then, Sparkler arrives, fresh off the train to be here, and you tell her happy birthday.
>She raises a brow.
>"It's not my birthday. It's our sisters."
>Before you can question it, Dinky is hugging Sparkler and telling her that Derpy wouldn't be their when they visited.
>Sparkler gives the filly the same assurances, and says Derpy will meet them their as soon as she can.
>Somewhat satisfied, they set out, and you follow, wanting to ask what's going on.
>Missing the fact that your best friend apparently has three daughters, though, is pretty embarrassing, and you don't think of a way to voice your confusion before you reach a place that makes dread settle in the pit of your stomach.
>Ponyville Cemetery.
>Your suspicions are answered as the pair of ponies stop at a tombstone, and Dinky pulls the gift from her saddlebag, a small stuffed badger.
>"Hey, sis, happy birthday!" she says cheerfully, placing the toy down. "Hope you like my present! Her name is Cregga Rose Eyes, and she's a super tough warrioress!"
>She looks back.
>"Sparkler is here, too. Um, Mommy will be here, later, but until then, you can meet Anon! He's super nice and gonna be our new daddy soon even though he and Mommy keep saying that he won't be. Anon! Come say hi to my little sister!"
>You step forward, mouth dry as you read the name on the front of the tombstone.
D'aww but also sadness.
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Most of my best pics are too l00d for blue board.
I remember a post from a while ago that said since Ponies are prey animals they are more accustomed to losing their young to the odd monster attack.

That's why they are super surprised when they see Anonymous freak out and go ape shitt whenever his kid is threatened.

so I was wondering if any of you writefags have any ideas go with this premise
I thought this was really cute and wholesome at first. Dinky thinking Anon is her daddy is fucking adorable and I can't get enough of it. That little bit where Anon refuses money (but still gets paid in muffins) made my heart the big heart. But then the ending happened. Now, Derpy being this frantic about missing her daughter's birthday is actually really really sad. Especially since little foal's toys are age-appropriate for how old Dizzy was when she passed.

Why you gotta do these things to me, Anon? What did I ever do to you? It's 8:30 in the morning and I haven't even had coffee yet.
I'd like to see this more from the pones side.

>"Careful girls. Those men still have humie brains. They'll reach out to touch, nudge, and shove eachother that's playful to them but really scary to us. The way they walk and move is all pressure and submission instead of pressure and release like a normal pony so they'll keep chasing and following if you run and will only release pressure when you make yourself look small. If you groom them or play with their hair they'll go into a resting state. If you poke one in the chest when he's resting his humie brain will really take over and he'll grab you and pull you into a hug."
Through Medical karaoke bullshit Anon introduces the ponies to metal.

the Mares then proceeded to freak the fuck out because there's no way egg normal undamaged male could sing about things so aggressive and in such a violent way
God voice to text is atrocious it was supposed to say magical karaoke bullshit
It was done once or twice, but I can't remember who posted it. One was a full-blown story where Anon rescued his daughter from diamond dogs.
>Anon plays music that the writefag personally likes and all the ponies go "WOAH!"
what a hot new idea
I never claimed I was original or clever
This is adorable
>Make friends with Trixie
>You think her magic's neat, and she comes to admire the way you don't just roll over like most stallions do
>Trixie leaves Ponyville with a rare genuine smile on her face
>They exchange letters every few weeks
>One morning, Anon hears a frantic knock on his door
>Opens the door
>Barely spots Trixie's cart on his front yard before she zips in through his door and kicks the door shut
>Runs through his house
>Anon finds her hiding under the covers on his day
"...Trixie, what the fuck are you doing here?"
>Rarity always had some trouble romantically.
>Her choice in profession and fairly colty personality did her no favors with stallions.
>Neither did her body. Stallions want strong, streamlined mares, not soft ones with fat rumps.
>Not to say she was totally dateless, but her few dates were more interested in her self-made wealth, her contacts, and their imagined hero version of her.
>And Rarity, being generosity given form, simply couldn't tell them no.
>The right one will show up eventually.
>Rarity stiffens on one morning walk when she feels intense eyes on her. Turning slowly, she sees the new 'hyumane' who unexpectedly found himself in town relaxing on a park bench.
>A nice (what the word? Man?) man he is. Both endearingly shy and with a janefilly streak.
>That same hyumane has a hungry gaze locked onto her behind. Even if his face is alien, the desire written on it is plain. His fingers flex against nothing, is if he wants to dig them into something.
>Rarity feels her face heat up and has to fight the urge to flag her tail.
>The watching hyumane licks his lips before realizing he's being watched in return. He quickly turns away, a blush staining his cheeks. He flicks his eyes to Rarity's for a moment and squirms before looking away again.
>The unicorn bites her lip. Faust, that's cute.
>She should go for it.
>The dirtier part of her mind wonders what those fingers would feel like squeezing her cutie marks, or maybe...
>Rarity shakes her head and puts on a winning smile before trotting over to the now panicking hyumane. "Anonymous, dear. How are you thing morning? Care to join me for BREAKFAST? I've been dying to try the new Cafe in town and it would be even better with company. My treat, of course."
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>Treat Anon as the most sexy male alive.
Reminds me of that Johnny Bravo fic.

>Also, my favorite part of the fic.

"Oh yeah? Well I'll hit you so hard all your male ancestors will feel it, and by the time my fist gets to your momma, all it'll do is write down where she can find me so I can take her out for a nice lobster dinner, and then I'll NEVER call her again."
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>three dates later
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Look at that sunshiny ass.
>Still be Anon
>It had been a few days since that whole thing with Trixie
>To your slight shame, that wasn't the last time you had given the mare some bits in exchange for lewd favors
>It was only slight shame because Trixie could suck out your soul through your cock, and really seemed to enjoy leaving you a crumpled, broken, sexually spent husk of a man
>Every single day the two of you had fooled around, with Trixie going so far as to come over to your house when she knew you were off work so she could jump you as soon as you came through the door
>The one time she hadn't even let you get out of your work clothes, sucking you off in the middle of your kitchen
>She had insisted hopping into the shower with you to clean up, and then stayed late snuggling up against you on your couch watching human movies before she got bored and blew you again
>"That one is on Trixie," she had told you, your cum on her face and in her mane
>It had been a wild few days, and Trixie was probably well on her way in paying her rent for her wagon
>Which was kinda good, right?
>Just because you got blowjobs in exchange didn't make you a dirtbag
>That whole thing wasn't even your idea; Trixie was the one yanking your pants down most days
>You were the good boy in this situation if you really thought about it
>Today had been a particularly hard day at work
>The section of line that you and your crew were working on today had been the mother of all pains
>The area had been rocky, making it hard to dug even with the help of those stupidly strong earth ponies
>Applejack and a few mares had also complained about you being the on-site foreman
>You swear that apple farmer went out of her way to be a pain in your neck
>It wasn't going to be fun at all whenever you had to put a line through her property
>Still, you had gotten the work done
>Two miles of line had been put in, tested, and buried, with another day of the same tomorrow
>You were exhausted, both physically and mentally, so much so that you had almost asked one of your crew to carry you home on their backs
>Which, now that you think about it, was probably some sort of racial discrimination that could have gotten your ass fired
>The walk home was longer than usual as you dragged your feet, so tired that you could barely say hello to the ponies that waved at you
>You were so sweaty that your shirt clung to your chest, and every time you walked you swore your boots made a squelching sound
>Even so, you were able to make it to your house, kick off those boots, and plop down onto your couch
>You even let out one of those tired, defeated old-man groans to round the whole thing off
>Since you and your crew had started early in the day--as you always did, to keep Celestia's sun from making an already hard job miserable--there was still a lot of the day left
>If you weren't so tired, you might have gotten some other work done
>Maybe go shopping, maybe put in that gutter for your roof like you swore you'd do a month ago
>As it was, the only reason you didn't pass out on the couch was because you didn't want the thing to get all gross from sweat and dirt
>You yawned, rubbing your face with a hand, ready to get up and make the arduous journey up the stairs toward your bathroom, when you heard your front door opening
>Back on Earth, this might have been the cause of some alarm, especially since whoever was coming in hadn't even knocked, but it was different in Equestria
>Ponies liked to just sort of walk into folks' houses; it was some sort of weird herd mentality, friendship-based tradition they had
>The mayor told you about it when you had first moved in, since she knew that most humans locked their doors like a sensible species, and you had sort of gone with the flow after that
>You heard your door clicking shut, which was followed by the sounds of hoofsteps on your nice wooden floor
>You attempted to get up with a grunt, failed, and sort of slumped against your couch
"If you're those filly scouts again I don't want any popcorn," you called. "I already got ten boxes of the stuff."
>A giggle came from the hallway
>"I'm a bit too old to be a filly scout, and I think their popcorn is pretty gross, so you don't have anything to worry about," a voice called back
>You recognized that voice
>It was comrade Starlight; commie horse extraordinaire
>The mare poked her head into your living room, a smile on her face
>"I see you just got off work. You look tired."
"Yep," you said, shaking your head. "I'm pretty beat."
>"I heard Applejack was giving you a hard time again."
"She was. The turd."
>"I wouldn't get too mad at her, Anon," Starlight said, making her way into the room. "She's an old-fashioned mare. She just doesn't want you hurting yourself."
"I barely do any of the heavy lifting," you said. "I just yell at people and try to keep them from killing themselves with power tools. It's not like I'm juggling knives."
>"I'll ask Twilight to talk with her again. See if she can get her to leave you alone," Starlight said, taking a seat right in front of you
"I'd really appreciate it," you said, letting your eyes slip shut. "That mare's been getting real insufferable lately. So, what's brought you here? Trying to convert me to Marxist teachings again?"
>Starlight snorted
>"You can make fun all you want, but he really did have some good ideas."
"Ideas so good that they never worked in any meaningful scale whatsoever."
>You heard Starlight take a deep breath, as she usually did before a rant
>This time though, oddly enough, she didn't immediately assault you with words and "facts" and all of that nonsense
>"Joking aside, I really need to talk to you about something, Anon," she said.
"Yeah, and what's that, Glimmy?"
>"Well... Twilight has decided to start making me pay rent for staying in her castle. More than I can afford to be honest..."
>Your eyes snapped open
"You're shitting me, right?" you asked
>Starlight stared at you solemnly, not saying a word
>The two of you just sort of stared at each other, silence filling the air
>You watched as the unicorn's mouth twitched
>She then let out a snort, which turned into a belly laugh
>"Oh, the look on your face," she said between chuckles, pointing at you. "Oh Celestia was that worth it..."
>You frowned as she had a good giggle at your expense
"Was that really necessary?" you asked
>"Sorry, sorry," Starlight said, wiping a tear from her eye. "I couldn't help it. It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up"
"So... you know about me and Trixie?"
>"Of course."
>You sat up, leaning forward
"I gotta ask, since you're Twilight's personal student and all, is that whole thing about Trixie needing to pay her rent to park her wagon actually real?"
>"Of course not," Starlight said, shaking her head. "Twilight would never do anything like that."
>Oh, that little blue turd
>"Yep, in fact I'm really surprised that you fell for that," the unicorn continued
"How was I supposed to know?" you asked defensively. "Trixie played it off really well! Are you sure she doesn't actually pay rent? Because if she doesn't I'm gonna be pretty upset."
>commie horse backstabbing her sis
That's why you get no dick while Trixie use cum as shampoo, Starlight.
>Starlight just chuckled
>"You hyoo-mans are a bit gullible, huh?"
>You took in a deep breath, then exhaled
>If Glimmy wasn't bullshitting you, you just might be the stupidest man that has ever lived
>Like a mythically stupid individual
"She actually doesn't have to pay rent then?" you asked
>"Nope. Not a bit," Starlight replied.
"You're absolutely sure?"
>You slowly nodded, not really upset, but pretty confused
"Is this some weird cultural thing, mares tricking guys into paying them for sexual favors, or was I just getting messed with?"
>Starlight's grin lessened somewhat
>"Welllllll, actually, Trixie and I had a bet going on," she said, looking bashful. "I bet her fifty bits she couldn't get a stallion to pay for a blowjob."
>The unicorn shrugged
>"I like to gamble, and I thought it was a sure-fire bet. I didn't expect you to fall for it."
>She looked up at you, ears folding against her skull
>"Would it make you feel any better if I told you she was gonna give you all your bits back?" she asked
>That did make you feel a bit better
>Not that you were really all that mad to be honest
>You had worked in construction all of you life; you had seen some of the lengths people went to win bets or prove points
>Tricking someone into getting a blowjob wasn't in your top ten
"If it was just for a bet and she's giving me back my money, why the hell is she over here every single day?" you asked
>Starlight looked at your groin
>"I saw your first little "session". If I was Trixie I'd be coming over here everyday too."
>The unicorn cleared her throat
>"There's also the fact that we might have also made another bet. If she managed to talk you into putting it in her tailhole by the end of the month I'd owe her a hundred bits."
>You stared at the mare for a few seconds before a chuckle escaped you
"Well, you would have won that bet," you said. "I'm not much of an anal guy."
>"Really? Aw," Starlight said, pouting. "I should have waited then."
"You should have," you said. "Now you gotta pay her the bits because you told me, you little cheater."
>"What? No I don't," Starlight said, eyes widening
"Of course you do. You can't just make a bet and try to weasel out of it," you replied
>"Trixie won't know I tried to weasel out of it if you don't tell her, Anon. Come on, be a sister from another mister. Please?"
>Her eyes once again flicked to your groin
>"If you keep your mouth shut I'll make it worth your wild."
>You watched as her tail flicked from side to side as the tip of her horn glowed, unbuttoning your pants
>This turn of events wasn't something you were expecting
>Still, you weren't going to look a gift horse in the mouth
"If I tattle I might be able to talk her into giving me half the bits," you said
>For a moment, Starlight looked a bit panicked
>A hundred bits wasn't an insignificant amount of money
>You had no idea how much her job at the friendship school paid, but you had a feeling that this bet was close to a paycheck for her
>You watched as she quietly wrestled with something in her mind before a smile came back to her face
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>Starlight being the one to tell anon instead of making Trixie do it.
>Telling him about the second bet because she thought she'd lose.
>Now trying to bribe him to keep his mouth shut while he's bone-tired from work.
Glimglam is being a very big piece of shit right now and anon should refuse whatever sex thing is coming up on sheer principle.
>"Then I just I'll just have to give you a sixty bit experience then, huh?" she said, tilting her head to the side
>Your pants zipper was pulled down all the way
>A grunt escaped you as you felt her magic grab your dick and slip it through the hole in your underwear
"You think you can do that, Glimmy?" you asked, leaning back into your couch. "That's a lot more than what Trixie charges."
>"Trixie just uses her mouth," Starlight said, eyeing your cock. "Sure, she's pretty good at it, but a mouth is nothing compared to magic. Especially when somepony knows what they're doing."
>She got up, moving close enough that she was able to rest her head on your thigh
>Her horn glowed just a bit brighter, and right above her an ethereal hand formed out of her magic
>"With enough practice, a unicorn can basically do whatever she wants," Starlight said, making the hand open and close. "If you're really powerful, the sky is pretty much the limit."
>She nuzzled your leg, eyes slipping shut
>"Hmmm... I can see why Trixie loves coming here right after you get off work," she muttered, grinding her flank against your floor. "That smell really is something."
>You lifted up a hand, placing it on the mare's head as her magic hand floated down and grabbed your cock
>Oddly, it felt warm as it touched your bare flesh, with a very slight tingle
>Another hand materialized, floating down to cup your balls as the other began to stroke you
>Starlight had the hand make twisting motions, using both slow, long strokes and short, quick pumps
>You leaned back a little more, spreading your legs nice and wide as you found yourself becoming hard
>Starlight sighed as you began scratching her ears
"That's a neat trick, but I don't think a handjob is gonna cut it, Glimmy," you said. "This is nice, but not sixty bits nice."
>The mare giggled breathlessly, her tail flicking back and forth
>She tilted her head up to look at you as she began slapping your cockhead against her soft, furry cheek
>"I know, you silly colt. I just needed to get you all ready."
>The hand groping your balls disappeared, and the hand stroking you make it's way down to your base, keeping your tip pointed at the ceiling
>"Like I said, a unicorn can use her magic for anything," Starlight said, wisps of magic coming off of her horn and floating above her head
>It quickly formed into a mouth; her mouth, you realized after a few seconds
>"A mouth--"
>The magic twisted and molded, turning into a winking marehood
>"A pussy--"
>It changed again, turning into what looked like a fleshlight
>"Or something even better than both of them."
>She brought the fleshlight-looking thing down, rubbing it against your tip
>Your cock twitched, and you let out a startled moan
>It was warm, and softer than anything that you had ever felt in your entire life; sort of what you imagined a cloud would feel like if you could actually touch one
>Just that little rub made your body curl forward in pleasure
>"If you think that feels good wait until you're inside of it," Starlight said, positioning the thing right above your cock. "Ready?"
"A-Actually, maybe--FUCK!"
>>She had insisted hopping into the shower with you to clean up, and then stayed late snuggling up against you on your couch watching human movies before she got bored and blew you again
>In one swift motion Starlight brought down the fleshlight, forcing all of your cock inside of it
>For a moment, your vision actually went white
>Your chest seized, and every muscle tensed as by pleasure unlike any that you had ever felt wracked your body
>Your hands shot up, trying to grab something, eyes widening
>If you had been able to, you might have let out a scream
>The inside of the fleshlight was a moving, almost living thing
>It pulsed, moved; it was warm, wet
>At the same time though, it was otherworldly
>Nothing in your life was comparable to what it was doing to you
>It felt so good that it was almost painful
>Starlight twisted it, pulling it a few inches up your cock before slamming it back down
>Stars exploded across your vision
>Your hips jerked, and you found your iron-hard cock firing rope after rope of cum
>Starlight winced as the first load flew over her head, sitting the floor below
>"Oops. Maybe I put a little too much oomph into it," she said, as another spurt of cum hit her mane and horn
>The fleshlight quickly disappeared, though you continued cumming harder and longer than you ever had before
>By the end of it, you didn't have the strength to hold your head up
>Your balls felt empty, and your cock felt like you had just tried fucking a big ass shop-vac
>That pleasure disappeared, replaced by an uncomfortable, aching pain
>Wheezing, you slumped sideways onto your couch, eyes shut tight
>Something nuzzled your chin
>"Anon? You okay there, champ?" Starlight asked
>It took a few moments for you to collect yourself, cracking open an eye to see that the unicorn's face was coated in your cum
>Usually, such a sight would have been hot, with Trixie seeing that would have you ready for a second round in just a few minutes, but you couldn't feel much of anything right now
"...Owwww," you managed to say, eyes slipping back shut
>"Sorry, sorry. I didn't think the spell would work that well," Starlight said
"It feels like someone tried to pull my soul through my dick," you replied, curling into a ball. "I don't like it."
>"That might be due to the rush of endorphins. Here, let me fix that."
>The twinkle of magic filled the air, this was followed by a cooling, soothing feeling entering through your toes and quickly working its way up your body
>The aching and exhaustion went away, which allowed you to open your eyes and sit up
>You looked down at your now soft cock, then at the mare sitting in front of you, taking a deep breath
"Please don't do that again," you said
>"I won't," Starlight said, placing a hoof against her chest. "Are you okay now? That spell should have negated any negative affects the spell might have on you."
"What even was that?"
>"Something that I worked on while I was a... mayor," the unicorn said.
"Mayor? You were never a mayor, you crazy little commie."
>"I was too! Sure, they didn't call me a mayor, but I sorta was one!"
"Are you talking about that weird cult town you used to run?"
>"It was NOT a cult town."
"It really was, but why in the world did you need a spell like that?"
>Starlight opened her mouth before it snapped shut, a blush coming to her face
>"Well... I always wanted to be covered in stallion cum," she said, looking down at the floor. "I made that spell, and was trying to figure out how to talk every stallion in town to let me use the spell on them at the same time, but Twilight and the other girls came in before that "plan" could come bare fruit."
>she has a bukakke fetish
>She looked down at your cock, letting out a chuckle as she placed a hoof against her cum-soaked hair
>"Though it looks like I wouldn't have needed more than one or two stallions if you're anything to go by."
>Her horn sparked to life, and the cum was gone from her face and mane
>She hopped into your lap
>"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked, nuzzling your throat.
"I'm fine," you said. "Seriously though, I'd never use that spell on a stallion. That could be used to torture someone I bet."
>"I won't. Cross my heart, hope to fly; all of that," Starlight said, going through the motions, even poking her eye. "Speaking of bets, I guess I really flubbed it on this one, huh?"
"Yeah. I think you kinda did," you agreed, wrapping an arm around her
>The two of you were silent for a few moments
>"You know, I have another spell. Not like the one I just used, but sorta the same."
"I bet you do."
>You poked the mare's cutiemarks, causing her to giggle
>"It's actually a spell created by a very famous mage: Tiny Dancer. That mare was known for her... interesting spells. It's tested, and I'm positive that it'd have the same result for you as it would a regular stallion."
>She grinded her rump against your groin
>"After that I can just get you off using the conventional means. I might not be Trixie, but I'm sure I can get that monster of yours spurting."
>You knew you should have probably just told the crazy horse no, that you had gotten your fill of magic for the day
>It would have been the smart, sane thing to do
was there any ever doubt that her taste was as shit as she is, oh Trips of Truth?
>>You swear that apple farmer went out of her way to be a pain in your neck
Next, she'll pitch a fit and get the whole town behind her the next time Anon tries to dig out his septic tank.
>You were many things, but smart and sane?
>Not so much
"It's not gonna hurt, right?" you asked. "Because if it does I'm gonna go bananas on you."
>"It won't hurt are all," Starlight said. "I'm eighty--ninety percent-five sure."
>You let out a sigh
"Fuck it. I'm not here for a long time I'm here for a good time. Hit me."
>Starlight's horn glowed as she tapped it against the bottom of your chin
>There was a small jolt, then nothing
>Just sitting there, you waited
"You sure this is supposed to work? 'Cause I'm really not feeling anything."
>"Just be patient. It's suppose to take a few seconds."
>A few seconds passed, then a few more, and still nothing
>You were about to ask the Starlight to cast it on you again when you finally felt something
>It started out in your chest; a warmth, a pleasant heat
>With each breath you took, it started to spread outward
>It made its way down your chest, down your arms and legs, the heat never becoming uncomfortable or overwhelming until it hit your groin
>Your cock twitched as the heat grew warmer
>You found yourself holding Starlight close, resting your chin on top of her head
>With each breath you could pick up a new scent; sweet, musky, mouthwatering
>It caused you to bury your face into the mare's mane, inhaling deeply, your cock twitching again
>Starlight once again grinded herself against your lap, and you became acutely aware that the mare's rump was wet
>Your hands made their way down her sides toward her rump, giving it a firm squeeze as you nipped at her neck
>The unicorn giggled
>Her voice, usually sweet and adorable--like most ponies--sounded downright angelic
What kind of mindfuckery has Glimglam done this time?
>In fact, everything about her seemed just a bit better than before
>Her fur was softer, the warmth coming off her body felt nicer, she smelled better than anything you had ever smelled
>"You okay there, Anon?" she asked
>You didn't answer, your hands leaving her rump
>Starlight jumped as you fingers brushed against her inner thighs
>"I guess it's working huh? See, I told you it wasn't that b--AD!"
>The mare twitched as you ran your fingertips along her marehood
>She was soaking wet, and you could feel the heat coming from her nethers
>It was getting a little hard to focus
>Starlight let out a groan as you toyed with her clit, wrapping your free arm around the mare's belly and lifting her up a bit before rubbing your face against her neck and chest
>You used your thumb to rub it in gentle circles while your pointer and middle fingers rubbed her lips
>Her clit winked against your hand, the mare's legs closing around your arm as her back arched
>"Oh... Oh that feels really, really nice," Starlight said, breathless
>She tried to tilt her head over to look at you, but you just nuzzled yourself more firmly against her neck
>The mare let out laugh, which turned into a squeak as you slipped a finger inside of her
>Your breathing hitched, and you almost let out a squeak along with her
>She felt so warm, so wet
>You could feel her inner muscles flexing around your finger, prompting you to push it deeper inside until you were past the second knuckle
>"T-That's... Oh Celestia," Starlight said, tensing as you dragged the finger along her walls
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>Just casually send him into a mating frenzy.
Pretty sure this counts as rape.
>She tensed as your digit slid on a slightly textured surface, letting out a hiss in your ear
>You pumped your finger in and out of her, slowly, savoring that musky, powerful scent as it grew more noticable
>Your hand grew slick with Starlight's excitement, but you couldn't bring yourself to care as you slipped another finger inside of her
>Fingertips tickled her walls
>Each time she clenched you wiggled your fingers back and forth
>Your other hand made its way down to play with her rock hard teats, which had her panting like a dog while she grinded herself against your lap
>Your eyes slipped shut, and you let out a hum as you slipped a third finger inside of the mare, much to her enjoyment
>It was relaxing, it was enjoyable; you might have continued fingering the mare until the sun when down if an idea didn't suddenly pop into your head
>Pulling your fingers out of the mare, ignoring her groan of disapproval, you popped them into your mouth
>The taste was out of this world
>Sweet, savory, tangy; it was so good that your eyes snapped open
>You needed more
>Starlight, watching you lick her cum off your hand, turned beet red
>"Holy fuck that ho--eep!"
>You hoisted the mare into the air
>As she squirmed, you laid down onto the couch, placing her rump right at eye level and gently laying her down
>Your head forced her legs to spread out wide, her tail tickling the top of your head and the back of your neck as you dragged your tongue up the length of her pussy
>"A-ANON!" she said, alarmed, legs clamping around your head
>You just groaned
>She tasted ever better like this
>The weight of her on top of you, the heat, the smell
>You weren't a religious man, but now you were starting to see the appeal
>You lapped at her marehood and her inner thighs, licking her clean of her arousal before once again attacking her slit
>Her clit winked against your nose as your tongue parted her lips with each drag upward of the tongue
>Starlight continued to wiggle and squirm, but eventually went limp when you slipped a tongue inside of her
>Her inner muscles clamped down so hard that they nearly forced your tongue out of her
>You persevered, wiggling your tongue from side to side, slowly but surely forcing your way deeper inside of her
>Your tongue brushed against that slightly rough texture again, and Starlight let out a scream that you could clearly hear even with her legs wrapped around your head
>A mouth wrapped around your cock, a tongue swirling around your head, but you barely noticed
>Your tongue slipped deeper into the unicorn, you licked her with more fervor until her belly was heaving and your head, neck, and chest was covered in her arousal
>"Fucking buck! A-Anon! You really need to--" Starlight began
>You pulled your tongue out of the mare
>Dragging your tongue up her slit, you stopped at her clit
>It winked against your lips, and without a second thought you began to suck on it
>Starlight's body went from limp to and as a rock and shaking in less that a second
>The mare bucked her hips, letting out a yelp
>You wrapped your arms around your waist, keeping her pinned against you as you continued to suck
>A shiver ran through Starlight's body, the mare screaming as she came all over your face
>You let out a hungry growl, letting go of her clit to lick her clean

>Be Starlight
>Be very much exhausted
>It had been a little shaky at first, but you think everything went wonderfully
>Your spell--basically a watered down Want-It Need-It spell, had worked better than you expected
>You had heard that really didn't work on ponies--something about your natural magic messing with the spell--but Anon hadn't been able to keep his hands off of you
>It was a shame that you had emptied his nuts so fast with your first spell, otherwise you might have seen if the colt would have let you bounce on that big cock of his
>Maybe next time if you could talk Trixie into it?
>At the very least you could make up for the fact that you came so quickly
>Shit was embarrassing
>You giggled as Anon peppered your face with kisses
>The hyoo-man had pinned you underneath him, arms wrapped around your middle
>You were pawing at his chest and face, playfully trying to dodge his smooching
>You could have easily teleported away, but it was just too much fun seeing Anon like this
>Anon, planting one last kiss on your lips--which you returned since you weren't made out of stone--maneuvered himself so that he was laying on his side
>Almost as soon as he did it, you heard his breathing slow
>You wiggled yourself against him, your back pressed against his chest
"So... did you enjoy yourself?" you asked
>Of course, the sleeping hyoo-man didn't reply, so you used your magic to pick one of his arms up
>With a giggle, you draped it over yourself
>This was worth every one of those hundred bits
Alright done. Will probably do one more chapter
Thanks for the green LaP. You gonna toss the story up into your bin?
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>Want-It Need-It
>Even fucking lied about it.
Part of me wants to see Trixie and GlimGlam fighting over anon and another part of me wants to see how the M6 will react once they find out GlimGlam's been casting mind altering magic on a poor, defenseless colt to sexually assault him.
What does "HFY" stand for?
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Humanity Fuck Yeah. A genre of stories written to showcase how awesome humanity is. Lots of times it's done poorly by just making humans OP via technology, being "out of the box" thinkers, or some other badly used trope. When done right it is pretty good.
"Humanity Fuck Yeah"
Powertrip stories about how humans are 6000000% better than aliens/ponies/whatever.
It's pretty much guaranteed to be edgy and/or marie-suesque garbage, unless it's very watered down or not the focus of the story.
no thanks
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I'm posting it again.
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I'm a fan of the 'Humans are space orcs' trope myself.
I would not be surprised if feeling something so foreign would literally cause my body to reject the foreign feeling as if it were a disease or some sort of heart problem
>"Hey there, good-looking."
>"You're one of those Earthlings, right?"
>"What? These? Oh, they're just my big, fat tits is all."
>"No big deal really. I got a big perky butt too, though I know you know that from those wandering eyes of yours."
>"Hey, is it true that you earthlings love it when we press your faces between our tits?"
>"I also heard it's really easy to make you addicted to our tight pussies?"
>"What, you don't know?"
>"Well, would you like to find out~?"
So where's the rest of the Veil stories?
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I gotchu
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Miss me bitch, I'm already addicted to alicorn cunt.
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My nigga
However his art is shit
I rather like the chest muscle definition that he did there, actually. IRL horses have that too so it's a nice nod to ponies.
Their legs look like they just snap on.
Well, there were a few others in the Veil of Madness that I knew about.
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I enjoyed this one.
The chances of an Alicorn, conceiving a foal, are a million to one, they said.
The chances of an Alicorn conceiving a foal, are a million to one. But still, he cums.
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>You watched as the Earthling froze
>You swore you could almost see the gears spinning in his head as he processed your words
>His eyes widened, and a pinkish hue colored his cheeks
>You couldn't help but grin
>Princess Cadence's "Equestrians Guide to Earthlings And the Art of Peezter Making" was right on the money
>It was easy to see that this cutie had never been hit on before
>He was totally unprepared
>With a giggle, you hooked your arm through his
"Come on, lets go somewhere more... private," you said, fluttering your eyelashes at him
>The Earthling mumbled something incoherently
>It was almost funny really
>You had been one of Celestia's students as well as the heir to one of the more notable families in Canterlot and you hadn't so much as gone to second base with a guy
>Here finding a guy was layers upon layers of houses playing their little "game"
>It was like a lottery, but the winners were already insufferably wealthy and power
>The men knew that
>They knew they had all the power, and a lot of girls here suffered because of it
>A girl could move mountains and they'd still be told they weren't good enough
>And you were just able to snatch this Earthling up
>No fuss, no mental gymnastics other than a smile, some words, and a wink
>The ball was in your court; the game was yours to absolutely win
>And you nothing if not a winner at heart
>You giggled to yourself--somewhat maniacally-- pressing yourself against the Earthling's side
>He tensed for a moment, then relaxed
>All you needed to do was convince him that staying with you in Canterlot and you were set
>Maybe take him out to dinner
>Get to know him, see what he likes, his hobbies, what makes him tick as a person
>Then FINALLY lose your fucking V-card
>Then, Celestia willing, you might be see him walking down an aisle
"I'm Sunset by the way. What's your name, Sweetie?"
"Anon? That's a really cute name! So why don't you tell me about yourself, Anon?"
Same. I don't care how true to life his anatomy is, his ponies look disgusting.
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>Unusual aggression, more akin to a predator than a pony.
>Coordination issues, like she was wired for different limbs.
>And now human teeth. Very obvious omnivore chompers.
>One drunk night is all it took to fuck everything up. No one pointed hooves (or fingers) and the plan was to pretend it never happened and take the secret to their graves.
>...Cadence may have lied on the last one. Her daughter deserved to know, but it would wait until adulthood.
>The first time she felt Flurry's canine teeth sink into her teat, Cadence knew the ruse was nearing it's end. She and a certain human were going to have a lot to answer for...
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Awww yeah
>princess of love
new thread
yeah, make it legit or don't do it at all
casual sex is for faggots, and cheating is for dumb faggots that don't know what they've got until it's gone
fuck you
"Fuck you"
>"That kinda gay anon"
Thanks for the thread, but you're still a faggot for making them so early.
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Not that Anon, btw.
>Anon pops into Equestria the day Shining was going to meet Cadence for the very first time
>Shining is heading out the door (off to where he'd unknowingly meet Cadence for the first time) when the flash of light in the distance that accompanied Anon's arrival surprised him
>He dropped the corndog he was going to munch on while he walked
>It's ruined now
>He realizes he has enough time to make another one, and turns back to do just that
>Leaves the house a few minutes later
>Cadence arrives at the very physical spot that she and Shining were supposed to meet for the first time... and moves on, since there was no reason for her to stop there
>Minutes later, Shining crosses by the exact same spot... and continues on his way, since there is no princess there to talk to; nor does he expect there to be one
>A day later, Cadence is called in by Celestia
>She's tasked with trying to talk to an alien and to get him to calm down
>"You're a princess, Cadence, and difficult diplomacy is part of the job. Consider this practice for when you have to talk to the Yaks."
>Cadence enters the room where Anon is, and she gets him to calm down
>They start talking, and both are surprised when they hit it off
>They become friends, and the rest is history
>Meanwhile, Shining ends up meeting a lovely trio of mares and eventually falls in love with them
>They have a handful of foals, and they're all very very happy together
>Anon hooks up with Cadence after a few years of being very good friends, and they start a family a little while later
>Cadence is still friends with that purple little filly she used to foal-sit ("Nobles are basically children, Cadence. This is good practice."), and they all have a big family reunion
>Anon and Shining meet up and get along well together
>They drink cider and share horror stories of raising their respective foals, and Shining is happy to have found another colt who likes tabletop games
>The End
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I won't be as dishonest to say something about them seems off, but I do overall enjoy the more horse like nature of their bodies.
is that before he was shit
Got any recommendations for good stories?
Only issue I have with this is it's far too short, I wanted interaction with these ponies damn it! Interaction!
Anonymous, first of his name, crown prince of labyrinth.
With the Celestial Princess and every royalty out to claim the hot Warrior Prince.
So, if you want some old-school stuff, you can peruse the imgur albums here: https://imgur.com/gallery/w3nA4

Note that not all the stories can be considered masterpieces, and most of the greentext stories will be about the length of one of the posted images above. Major issues as mentioned before are that it's hard to write humanity as something unique without trying to make them a Gary Stu/Mary Sue race. Well, since this thread's dying, I'll post some of the ones I liked here.
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I forgot about The Defense of Kalios. One of the few non-green HFY stories I liked.
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I liked this one as a stand alone, but supposedly the writer for this decided to expand on this story. It's all on r/hfy on you know what site. I read some of it, but it didn't pull me in like this one-shot did.
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It's up over 55 chapters now, and has a number of satellite stories by other authors(some of which have been referenced or heavily incorporated into the main work). I read faster than most people and it still took me a few days of marathoning the core thing to get through it all. Protip: any time you come up on what looks like a "quiet moment of domestic life / AND THEN THEY ALL FUCKED" sub-section of a chapter, just skip it, because that's all that'll happen and there are enough segues of that sort to become a major waste of time given the sheer scope of the story at this point.

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