Previous Bread >>33828868>What is a 'Satyr Abomination' thread about?A satyr is what happens when a human and a pony decide to get freaky and end up having a child. The top half is mostly human, the bottom is from pony mom (or pony dad). This thread is dedicated to the art and written works about these lovable creatures.>What about other species?The show had quite a few different intelligent species by season 8, 'everycreature' and all. Pick your poison, but /mlp/ is mainly into ponies.>What is the world/characters/personalities & attributes?The most common setting is one or multiple Anons in Equestria. Most of the established characters are in the list below, the personalities mostly vary from green to green. Just ask the thread about common headcanons.Satyrs by Parent: https://pastebin.com/d7T2GaDkStory by Parent: http://pastebin.com/qFf46ep5Author List: http://pastebin.com/RFgtrECqSearchable Archive:http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/search/?tags=satyrDiscord:https://discord.gg/4yAUDzKDropboxhttps://www.dropbox.com/sh/m74cw1zph214irq/AACgNqIgES4fQORdx3rooQoVa?dl=0Kid Icarus ROM Hack: An alpha hack for the NES Kid Icarus game.https://filebin.ca/3NORheK9hIFr/hope.ips
Winter > summer
>>33970607That pic's pretty accurate and your opinion is both based and objectively correct. I actually switch to playing less demanding games during summer so my system doesn't have to work as hard.I wonder if any satyrs would be into human tech.
>>33970699I feel plenty would be. Depends on what's available to them.There's the idea of Bon Fraise being something of a media junkie. A collector of all things film, game, music, and possibly eventually going for a job in that industry.
>>33970742>"It stinks."-Fraise, probably
>>33971429Yeah, I imagine he's one of those sorts.Think a James Rolph, when he's not doing a character sort of personality.
>>33973804I want to give her undefended booty a spank before I help out.
How well could you handle your satyr going for a swim in the mirror pool and coming home with several clones of themselves?
>>33975450"This is why you're late for dinner? Because you've been playing with yourself for hours? I... Wait, forget I worded it like that."
>>33975450"..You're not getting 20 allowances."
>>33975450>>33975484>"But daddy, 20 daughterwives."
>>33975504"I'm not made out of money and dicks."
>>33975509You don't need to. They'll take turns working a job, tending the house, and taking care of you. And raising the babies, if that's what daddy wants.
>>33975450>Damn crosswords, you swear one of these days you'll finish one before->"Hey, daddy!""Hi, sweetheart.">You greet your daughter without looking up from your newspaper as she walks in through the front door.>Not to mention how counter intuitive Equestrian spelling was for a non native speaker.>"Hey, dad!""Hey, pumpkin."You greet your daughter as she walks through the front door.>Besides, the rest of the paper was a joke with hardly a shred of real news anywhere to be seen.>"Hi, dad.""Hello, sweetie, how was... wait.">You glance up as your daughter yet again walks in through the front door and heads upstairs."Huh, talk about déjà vu, weird.">You look back down at your paper and->"Hey daddy.">You again look up as the front door opens yet again. "What the hell?"The only thing better than one babybat? Two babybats.
>>33976224Damnit! The mayors gonna have my ass in a sling over this!We're tasked with bringing this Spanker to justice, not enticing him with more daughteru's!
>>33976224>The only thing better than one babybat? Two babybats.
>>33976224If daughteru has her own clone posse, will she handle her own spanking?
>>33976314"Yuzu, stop licking the remote, it's unhygienic.">"But how else am I supposed to stop Murmur from changing the channel?""You're supposed to share. Your sister only visits for a few months out of the year, so you could at least let her pick what to watch.">"Yeah, well... I licked the remote, that means I own it now and she can't have it. It's the law.""Overruled. I am the law."Stupid licking phase.
>>33970507Alright, goin to rite a greentext later
I been working on Bella x Barry kids
Does anybody do anything with Mistake anymore?
>>33977402Also this nerd
>>33977502(She doesn't have a name yet.)
>>33977502They all born the same day, yes, it was a fun day on the hospital
>>33977502This one seems very bully-able.
>>33977801They're all bullyable.
>>33977402Well, tell us a bit about them.
>>33977387Here's the greentext I've been typing since school this is my first satyr story of a zebra so be ready with me here.>you've been stuck in Equestria for a loong time>1 month does make everything long n bleak when there is no internet>7 days in the Goddard Forest, 8 days in the desert equivalent to north Africa, Arabs, mareslims, and a damn sulu.>screwdlife.jpg, that was it.'Holy shit, is that a lake!'>you rub your eyes, making sure your eyes™ wasn't deceiving you with december.>it's real. and you ran towards it so fast that capcom sonic was proud of you'Sonic's my name, speed is my g-'>you stopped in midair'sh and looked of what you saw>a zebra was there, an equine kind like all ponies with it's companion.>it's companion was a she, you could tell because she has big boo->annd they caught you ogling like hawkman>quick! think of something, anything"May i have some water!!" you shouted with soreness as your throat was dry as a furry suit>they looked at you quizzingly, and then the satyr-looking wamen approached you, her hand was balled while the zebra was behind her>she's 11/10, with fur covering the majority of her body, her face looked like a horse except more humanlike, unlike a saddle arabian.>her legs were zebra legs, with a wide hip and a juicy leg that you can hoof at a disco party.>and you already know about the upper body part, she looks like a human but at the same time she is not> you were busy with your binocularing her bode because she and her friend were sharing thoughts about this in their language, you don't know what their saying but this is getting pretty awkward, time for improvising*you point at the lake*>they stopped talking and watched you*you cupped your hand like a beggar and swish it forward and raise your head, signifying that you want to drink>they blinked at you with confusion while you retreat to your thoughts.
>>33978769This reminds me a lot of early AiE works.I'd recommend spending a tad more time ensuring proper capitalization and grammar, and cutting down on the outright meme text unless that's the point.Additionally, the few *action lines at the bottom can be just as well kept behind a > without losing meaning.Other than that, keep on keeping on. I'll reserve judgement until there's a bit more to look at.And welcome aboard.
>>33978769Mysteryofthesatyrs.pngExcuse me if this is a snippet>Inside your mind after retreating is below this sentence>they better understand because you are lost in this huge world called Equestria, which is in short a more forgiving environment than earth, with small exceptions of course, some area were harmless while most are down to noob-friendly wild areas like minecraft, there are few areas in this world that are considered dangerous, for example the desert that you just crossed, it was labor except much worse>you were snapped out of your thinking when a soft clapping hand were made.>she simply nodded and pointed at the lake>You drank the water from the lake like somekind thirsty hippo, the haste of it was really fast like a snail infused with Turbo>you finished drinking from the water, turned to them only to find out that the satyr was snitching inside your bag.
>tfw too immature to be a dad>tfw just right for being an uncleanyone else know this feel irl_______
>>33979447Don't sell yourself short, especially if you're in a position to be a stay at home dad.
>>33979464I kind of like being an uncle, though.Don't have to be the authority figure as much as their parents.
>>33979471Spend time uncleing it up, and you'll want your own little mijos and hijas eventually, Anon.
>>33979447>>tfw too immature to be a dadIn age or mentality? Because I have a friend that was a dad at 22 and he's a totally normal, hard working guy.
>>33978866Finally back(again)>time slowed down for and your andraneline screamed through you like a freshman running away from IT>it fills you with PANIC>Like a retarded autist->-you ran toward the zebra satyr and tackled her to the ground>you can feel her boob but ifnored to virgin and all>and also scaring her friend, which distracted you for a bit>You act without thinking>they both snarled at you, speaking foreign threats and stuff>Need to defuse bomb. -Every Counter-terrorist ever said>You're, now explaining the concept of stealing*you point at your bag*>they stopped snarling and gave you a blank look.*you point at your self and bag, to the point of you looking being like a possessive*>It took them seconds to unserstand it>there ears flattend and came back up, do ears show every mood about creatures in this world>you waited for a few seconds until the zebra mare was signaling you to GTFO off her>you knew that it's a 'her' because you were looking under her tail>the satyr on the other hand was just staring at you, like really long time, like she'd hoped that you'll carry her like a princess, away from a dragon.>Eventually you let go, even after you did he still stared at you for a time>wat do now>Hmmmmm>follow'em (<) GTFOH(Git the frak otter here)>Yep, no choice when.ypu just crossed a fiery desert>besides, your stomach was demanding attention like a baby so its only natural.>after the zebra mare nudge her satyr companion, she snapped out of it, spoke up another somekind of language and her friend nodded.>the satyr glanced at me for a 'few' seconds before they departed away from you>you waited for a "long" time, like when one guy smoked some weed he felt time moved faster than he could breath >Annndd theres a trail , you started following them, trying to NOT make a sound.>Guess you'll find their tribe then
>>33979907>when thinking of tribe you thought you were going to meet jungle dwellers, instead they were living in a middle of a plain opening, no walls, no well and no weapons too>just a plain looking place with huts being circular and some even straight up live underground(nit literally) with dried leaves covering the huts>like a rip off game of maze runner ch-1>literallystarving.png>little zebra filliesjpg and colts look pale too>feelsVERYbadman.webm>you knew your goal was to go back home, but this is just plain sad. maybe you should help sum niggers for a change>makes you feel like a saint (Excuse me if this is short but i have school now)
>>33980280It's all... very memey for now. We'll see where it goes.
Plump zebra booty
>>33982049Pear and Mac the Small will wage a grand war for the zebrass
>>33982049Ohh, so that's what they're called
>>33972000Look at this thot
>>33980280Pic related, cuz i rush b this one HARD>as you apprached the tribe center, they lazily looked at you with a hint of fear and plain curiosity.>now, what would an alien species like you do in this situation.>you looked at each of them their eyes sparkling with curiosity, even when weaken. and spoke in English "Take me to your leader">they were a bit surprise of what you just said, then slowly a zebra approached you she has a medium mohawk with sparse golden bracelets around her.>she stopped in front of you and pointed at the bigger tent with her hoof"thanks">they then lingered for long as you apprached the tribe leader with confidence outside of your shell>in reality, it fills you with ANXIETY>you opened a tent flap and saw wut the leader was doing>HE was sorrrounded with thicc zebra mares and servants, spite of that he was a bit more fat than the other of his tribesman.>originally you were vaguely unpleast of speaking out of this, but now you are about to lash out because of your great grand papi was a tribesman before you were born>no, contain thyself"are you the leader?" you asked>the zebra grunted as he stood up on his limbs and face towards you."what do you seek traveller" he spoke with a slight annoyance bu,immense curiosity"do you have anything to help with?" you half-heartedly asked as you were still sure that this fat zebra was spoiling himself>he placed the end of his limb and stroking his white beard and said"why do you asked'th" he looks a bit skeptical but you weren't"because everybo- pony is-""zebra" he interrupted >by correcting youit took you a few second to get it and flash back towards the original introduction."outsider want to help my tribe?" you nodded. making the zebra smile indifferently>neither of you said a word after that as the day quickly changed to sun into moon, signifying every tribeszebra to go to sleep(Unedited cha- post)
>>33982792Get a few posts before posting them. One at a time will result in no real response the further you go.
>>33984318Sure, I'll try posting this on pastebin
Your little satyr runs into the room to show your their "badass" new temporary tattoo. Quick, say something nice about it.The tattoo reads "Life is a Heck" and it's on their upper arm.
>>33985261>The tattoo reads "Life is a Heck">Nod in respect."Ah, I see you're a gangster. I'm pretty gangster myself.>Sip from silly straw and headpat her.
>>33985261I'm with >>33985279I want this to be the fun, goofy relationship I share with my satyrs.
>>33985279By pony standards that's pretty hardcore and now all the other kids think your satyr is a psycho not to be messed with. Word is they once even said the word "butt" in front of a teacher. Totally out of control.
>>33985383When you're world's best boomer dad to human eyes, but ponies think you're that scary parent.
>>33985261>it's in olde english>there's an AK-47 beneath it
>>33985705>ponies think you're that scary parent.He lets his child have sprinkles AND chocolate syrup.
>>33986241I hear he lets his kids rough house!
>>33985279This, then roll up my sleeve and show them my own "Hug Life" tattoo.>>33986255And only makes them wait 28 minutes after eating to go swimming.
>Daddy Anon>Daddy Anon>Daddy AnonDoesn't anyone give a single fuck about pony mom?
>>33986291Maybe. Try writing a story about her and we'll see.
>>33986301>Be a cute mare>Your husband suddenly ignores you completely>Your once-lovingly husband that you married>And whose baby you carried for months>He keeps your own child for himself for days on end>Like he only cares about what he wants and ignores everyone around him>You can even hear your child crying for mommy sometimes>But your human husband doesn't care>You don't exist anymore in his eyes
>>339863172/10 - It focused too much on Anon and his neglect and not enough on the pony mother. She's her own individual with her own life and dreams, not just a narrative device to be used to talk about her husband, and the writing should reflect this.
So I've been watching Moonbeam City and I can't help but imagine the character Pizzaz as lawyer Yuzu. Because they're both insanely sexy and I want them to smirk condescendingly at my penis.
>>33986527"Pogo, you and I have known one another for a long time, correct?">"Yes, ma'am.""So tell me, in all that time did I never warn you what would happen if you fucked me without asking first?">"Ma'am?""Because by letting Mendoza escape you've totally fuck both me and my entire prosecution of his drug-smuggling dirtbag boss!">"Ma'am, I really-""Cram it, I don't want to hear it!">"Shutting up, ma'am.""Either you get me that evidence or else maybe I don't talk to the mayor about who I think should be made the new chief of police."Hardass district attorney bat is best bat.
>>33986879>did I never warn you what would happen if you fucked me without asking first?And yet she dumped him for not being spontaneous enough when they were dating.
>>33986879>those pink eyesBat needs to sleep and not exist on coffee for a bit.
>>33986955Sleep doesn't pay for gifts for the niece and nephew.
>>33987058But it does make one approachable for a house husbando who will fill her with many babies.
>>33986879>Exiting the office, Pogo made it all the way to his desk before exhaling loudly, unaware that he'd even been holding his breath.>Feeling a hand slap him on the shoulder, he turned and looked up at his colleague.>"So, how'd it go?">Pogo gave the other officer an unamused glare."You guys are assholes, you know? To answer your question, it went about as well as I was expecting, but why's it always got to be me that goes in there and gets chewed out whenever there's a fuck up in the department?">The officer shrugged.>"Because that woman is God damn terrifying and even the chief is scared of her, but she always goes easy on you because she likes you.""You call yelling at me for fifteen minutes and looking like she wants to murder me going easy?">"Well shit, at least she didn't make you cry like the last guy that gave her bad news. Besides, look at it like this, at least you didn't end up marrying her.">Pogo's glare hardened."Don't you have work to do?"
>>33987167Murmur still gonna let her husband just go ahead and give that batty bat a baby bat?
>>33987367No. Not even if her sister begs her and it's her husband's birthday.
>>33987427She's gonna make bat gramps really sad.
>>33987513Well maybe so long as it's via artificial application or whatever you call it.
>>33987621Yuzu's in it for a baby, not for sex.And she knows he's at least a guy she won't have to be ashamed of when daddy asks who the father is.
>>33987621Murmur giving her husband a handjob while holding a glass vial to the end of his dick>"You'd better be thinking of me when you cum, at least if you know what's good for you."
>>33988028>he's at least a guy she won't have to be ashamed of when daddy asks who the father is.Well now what was wrong with the last guy? I mean apart from the rumors that he was a felon that caught her eye and "agreed" to date her in exchange for her putting in a good word for him at his parole hearing.
>>33988693Most guys who would be good enough are weirded out by how much of a daddy's girl she is.Most guys who aren't put off just don't have what it takes to even get through the first date.
>>33989274>weirded out by how much of a daddy's girl she isNot easy being the clear #2 man in your girlfriend's life."Hey, look who managed to get two tickets to the opening night of the synthwave lightsaber ballet on ice!">"That's great, babe. I've never been to-""I just know daddy's going to love it!">"I, uh... oh, yeah, I bet your dad will love it.""Sorry, were you going to say something?">"Only that I think maybe we need to have a little talk about... you know, things.">>33987513>>33988028"Listen, sweetie, I don't want you to rush into anything just because you think it's what I want.">"So you don't want another grandchild?""Are you kidding, I'd love one. The point is that you shouldn't let that change what you want or force you into something you're not ready for. Raising a kid alone is a lot of hard work, and you can say goodbye to getting a decent night's sleep for the first few years. Sure I want more little babybats, but more than that I want you to be happy. There's no rush.
>>33989409>Not easy being the clear #2 man in your girlfriend's life.Especially when she won't let you touch her ears despite the fact that you've been dating for almost a year.
>>33989905>"I don't get the big deal, they're just ears. Why not let me touch them?""Because I... Look, it's hard to explain, but I just don't like people touching them, okay? I'd hoped you respect me enough to accept it as a quirk of mine and move on.">"You let your dad touch 'em all the time.""That's different.">"How? It's not fair that he gets to do whatever he wants and yet I feel like I have to ask permission before I do anything with you.""Hey, you get to do lots of stuff with me that he doesn't!">"Like what?""Oh boy, I dunno, sex for example?">"Like you wouldn't let him have that too if he asked for it!""Don't be disgusting!">"Am I wrong?""It doesn't matter, because he'd never ask.">"Way to dodge the question."Is this relationship beyond saving?
>>33990247I hope he's got a side gf, is all I'll say.
>>33990247>>"Like you wouldn't let him have that too if he asked for it!"Just because she accidentally cried out "daddy" ONCE during sex that doesn't mean she's got issues.>>33990364>side gfI'm assuming American. Is it true that in the US it's, while not exactly acceptable, not as frowned upon to have multiple partners at once? Not cheating exactly, but more like keeping options open further into a relationship so that you may go on two second dates with two different people in the same week.
>>33990428You're asking the wrong guy, friend.
>>33990428I dunno where you got that. Seems pretty unacceptable to be dating around and playing the field further than say, the second date.>>33990247"The point is, he would never ask..."
>>33991405>"The point is, he would never ask..."But if he did, her answer would be what?"
>>33991428>But if he did, her answer would be what?""Nice try Mistake, but my dad's a good two inches taller than that and you can't pull his voice off to save your life.">"Ah c'mon, don't be a prude.""No, damn it, why do you always get so weird during egging season?"
>>33991428She'd take it as a mark of pride that he asked her over Murmur, because clearly that means she's his favorite and also the most attractive. She'd then laugh, because she knows he's joking.
>>33991471Little does Yuzu know that he confided to bugwife that, if she'd ever asked, he would have.Mistake's cool sharing her man with her BFF.
Do Yuzu or Murmur still assert dominance over Mistake?
>>33993654As their new mother-in-law, she has dominance over them and reminds them often that a flat chest is a status symbol.
>>33993863I bet Yuzu just brushes it off, and Murmur likes to argue with her, albeit far less actually malicious than she did when they were kids.Especially since her own baby bats like playing with their same aged aunts and uncles.
>>33991471"No, damn it, why do you always get so weird during egging season?">"Heh, I dunno, but hey you know what would be fun? Letting me lay eggs in your-""No.">"Just a few.""No.">"You'd barely even feel it, my ovipositor is really smooth and I'd be gentle.""For the last time, no!">"Well where else am I supposed to lay them? I'm practically bursting here!""Literally anywhere else.">"I thought you were my friend.""Go buy an incubator or something, jeez.">"But that just sounds so unnatural."
>>33993922So this was the conversation leading up to her own kid's conception?
>>33993922>"You'd barely even feel it, my ovipositor is really smooth and I'd be gentle. Well... I call it an ovipositor, though in changelings it's really more of a prehensile clitoris that engorges to many times its original size during egg laying season and allows me to safely deposit a clutch of about five or six-""Blah, blah, blah, I'm not listening! Don't want to hear that kind of stuff from you!"
>>33988028>Yuzu's in it for a baby, not for sex.Yuzu give in and goes to the sperm bank.>Yuzu's eyes widen as she sees just who exactly it is behind the front desk."Tonsils, you work here?">"Work? Oh right, yeah, I totally work here!">A muffled cry can briefly be heard as a split second later the pink-haired girl appeared to deliver several swift kicks to something on the floor behind the counter.>"So, uh, what can I do for you? I still owe you one for getting me out of that bit of trouble a while ago.">Yuzu was clearly dubious, but eventually gave in and sighed."I just want to be a mother. I've had it with dating, I've had it with men in general, I just want a baby.">It was at this moment that henchman/assistant Anon poked his head around the corner from the next room.>"Hey, T, I've grabbed most of what you wanted. You about ready to- Oh, I see you're with that scary lady from court... pardon me.">Yuzu pinched the bridge of her nose and looked up at Tonsils, barely acknowledging the man."Look, I don't care what incredibly illegal stunt you're pulling here, so just give me a vial of the best, most virile baby batter they have in back and I'll walk out of here without calling the cops."I know there's a lot of Yuzu stuff lately, but I like what I like and I'd gladly read about other characters if somebody wanted to post about them.
>>33994433Honestly, I could go for more Tonsils. Especially actually building her lore up so she's not so much of a meme.I've been partial to the idea of human influx yanking Equestria and all the other nations around suddenly from medieval times to semi-modernity, and one of the most stressful parts of her job is combating medical ignorance.She probably grew up with that assistant/boyfriend Anon of hers, and is really the only confidant she has, especially once her father died. Figuring he was probably already an older man when she was born, and taught her her trade.
>>33994603"So let me get this straight, you applied leaches to a severely anemic patient.">"Yeah, to suck out the bad blood. It's very common practice.""And how well did that work out for you?">"Well oddly enough, the patient died of totally unrelated causes shortly after.""You don't say! Maybe next time you could try-">"Let me stop you there. I'm not interested in your hocus-pocus human 'science' no matter what you say. We don't have time for that so-called medicine here."
>>33994644>"Why should I wash between every surgery? Are you saying you think I'm so filthy I'll kill people?"
>>33994644>>33994684"Listen, you glorified butchers, the five second rule is bullshit, and doubly so when you're applying it to the scalpel you just dropped!"
>>33995540Actually I don't personally subscribe to the idea of him getting with Mistake. I'm just open to talking about it if it suits the current theme of an ongoing discussion.
>>33995233>five second ruleAt least that doc accepts germ theory.
>>33995233This is why she drinks.If it weren't for that man of hers, she'd have probably jumped in front of a train by now.
>>33997598>"Nuh... five more minutes."
>>33997601Satyr needs an alarm clock, preferably the sort with a physical bell.Those things are the most unpleasant wake up noise. You'll never sleep through them.
>>33996303Do they meet up privately later?
>>33997861Doubt it, honestly.
>>33996549>"Germs. Is that what Earth called a bad spirits infection?"
>>33998775"Why are all your tools ornate?">"To show I'm a doctor of high standing. It puts patients at ease!""It also provides infectious material great place to propagate until it's plunged into a new host!"
>>33994433>give me a vial of the best, most virile baby batter they have>"Auntie Yuzu, I think the yogurt in your fridge has gone off. It tastes pretty bad.""Yogurt? What yog- Oh my god, Myopia, spit that out!"
>>33999890Could be worse, it could have gone like this.>"Auntie Yuzu, this yogurt is super tasty, I love it!""Yogurt? Oh no, you take after your mother."
>>34000042Gramps will take over her feeding from here on, I suppose.
>>33998775"I hate you stubborn horses so. Damn. Much."
Attention human parent, this is satyr. Please send more money for food and college supplies, definitely not booze and condoms.
>>34003408Unless it's medicine, engineering or an actual science, college is worthless these days. Better off getting an apprenticeship.Get a skill, get paid for it, no debt, be all but guaranteed a job in your field, and start with plenty of experience.
>>33998606>Doubt itWhy? Because Flurry Heart is a pony?
>>34003779What does that even mean?
>>34005704You gonna take your satyr to see some the fireworks?
>>34004284It's not exactly a secret that pretty much all shipping here is satyr x satyr, and the occasional fucked up ANON daddy x his own child.
>>34006210>ANON daddy x his own child.Hot.
>>34005776>presto tries making his own fireworks/pyrotechnics
>>34006256>Hot.Would be if people actually put a tiny bit of effort into it instead of making it unbelievable and cringe as hell.
>>34006277Please point out an example of it being done unbelievably, and explain how it could be improved and done better.
>>34006632>Please point out an example of it being done unbelievablyAlmost every green posted here where the writer treats incest like it's not a big deal at all and perfectly normal. And let's not forget where people act like only Anon and his DAUGHTER because male satyrs barely exists in incest stories exists. Like Anon's wife and everyone around them suddenly ceased to exist or something. Or satyrs whose dads are ponies being completely ignored.
>>34006655/irt/ here, /satyr/, this guy just lives to complain, you will know the beast by his "waaah its too casual" babble.
>>34006655>the writer treats incest like it's not a big deal at all and perfectly normalPoint to a specific one. Because I've only seen ones where it's a total or family secret.>>34006662We know. But hello, please feel free to kick up some discussion.
>>34006662>complain>Implying I'm complaining or lyingStop pretending that you know the history of this general.
Satyru fell asleep watching the fireworks. Do you use the sound as a mask to make them a new sibling?
>>34007589No, I slap them and tell them to wake up because I didn't pay for tickets to see the fireworks display just for them to sleep through it.
>>34008084I feel sorry for satyrs with boomer parents>monster sippin sandal wearing farmers tan having ass boomer dad>"Wake up! These tickets cost 2 bits! That was 2 bits I could've spent at pony storage wars!">"You KNOW I've always wanted to do that, why can't you support me?">"Ah you kids don't appreciate anything."
>>34008125>satyr bets on storage unitsInteresting. Had anyone in mind?
>>34008572Go for it, I only brought up storage units because that's what my dad is convinced is going to make him rich now.
>>34008575Oh no, no. I just meant it's an interesting angle to build a character up with some discussion.I just don't know who.
>>34007589>Do you use the sound as a mask to make them a new sibling?Are you seriously so messed up that you'd do it with your pony wife in front of your own kid? Asleep or not, that's just fucked up.
>>34009368Or it could've meant bring them in and use the blasts rattling the glass outside to cover the sound of the bed rocking.But I assume you knew that, you simply desire to be outraged.
>>34010474Suggest your topic, boyo.
>>34010474Well she is a popular, well fleshed out and visually appealing character with plenty of art.
>>34010535There is literally nothing wrong with breeding your baby bats.
>>34010527well in the interest of fairness there's never been half as much as sonfu x pony mom
>>34011286Satyr is mostly young men fantasizing about a family unit, so that's not even remotely surprising.
>>34010474Its a batyr/pedo/incest general.No wonder why artist fuck off from this place
>>34011669Didn't an above post literally invite anon's here to come up with a topic besides x topic they hate?
>>34011676Nah I have tried way to many times to talk about other things with zero results. I already gave up, i just came back to whats going on the thread
>>34011718>Nah I have tried way to many times to talk about other things with zero results.So then why bring it up if clearly nobody else is interested in talking about it? I mean there's no point in people stopping talking about, in this case, Yuzu, if all that's going to replace those discussions is empty bumps and a totally dead thread. People may as well just talk about what they enjoy, because at least that way there's some discussion going on.Also what other things? Specifically what do you want to talk about that isn't thread meta?
>>34011737What about how satyrs spend their time with other satyrs or how horseland deals with the satyrs.Like how they need to change the place because they are different
>>34011906>satyr shot dead by storekeep in self defense>"he was a gooboi dindu nuffin more bits fo dem programs."
>>34011906>they need to change the place because they are differentIt's the other way around, Paco.
>>34012170Nice concern trolling, Complain!
>>34012153it's a whole new species, not some randoms from another place, dumbass
>>34011906>Like how they need to change the place because they are different>>34012890>it's a whole new species...So everyone is pretty much going to ignore that humans magically popped into the pony world some years ago?
heyyyyyohow about a Yuzu request for old time's sake?
>>34013723I'm DJ.Give Yuzu request before I pass out.
>>34013750Yuzu facing the sneaky defense attorney D. Addie
>>34013678Hey DJ! Hope you'll stick around.Aunt Yuzu cuddling or spoiling her favorite niece and nephew.
>>34013757have I ever drawn a picture of Myopia? My memory is hazy and I can't find any on my computer
>>34013781Yes, but you never finalized her design.
>>34013750I thought for sure you'd met an untimely end at the hands of an outboard motor.>>34013833Personally I'd vote for C for dorkbat.
>>34013750Drunk Yuzu laughing and barely being able to stand on her own legs while Pogo or anyone helps her back to her home from a bar.
>>34014238Dorkopia sounds cute.
>>34014255>Pogo or anyone helps her back to her home from a bar."Dweeb, why the hell do you stink of alcohol and have lipstick on your collar? You'd better make your explanation unbelievably good.">"I know what you're thinking, Alex, but seriously it's nothing like that. See, I was with Yuzu at the bar and-""Your ex-girlfriend? You're not doing a great job at not making me mad so far.">"No, it's cool, I was just trying to get her into bed... Wait no, that didn't come out right!"
>>34014266"All units, this is officer Pie. We have have a code seven at the Poison Apple, repeat code seven. That's a smokin' hot older lady in need of some serious lovin' while intoxicated for you new recruits. Somebody get down here and deal with it so I can go home to my wife. Uh, also if you could hurry it along, dispatch, because she keeps trying to unbuckle my belt."
>>34014575>That's a smokin' hot older lady in need of some serious lovin' while intoxicated for you new recruits>Raping someone who's drunkMassive shame on you.
>>34014585who are the soi-tyr's>"holy yikeroonies on a popsicle stick, Pogo! that's a big oof from me, chum."
>>34014585He's calling for backup in order to get her safely home. He knows if he words it like that the new recruits will swarm in. Until they find out that the drunk woman is the DA, at which point they'll chicken out, but it'll be too late because Pogo's already made it home. He's basically just trying to hand his problem off to somebody else to deal with.
>>34014266He must have so many talon scars.
>>34015131And every single one was completely worth.
>>34014266"C'mon, don't you think it's about time you headed home? You know you're going to regret this in the morning, and besides, what would the other guys down at the precinct think if they knew the woman they were all terrified of let herself get into such a state?">"You're such a nice guy, Pogo... y'know that?">Pogo grimaced at the strong smell of alcohol on Yuzu's breath as she leaned heavily on his shoulder and slurred into his ear.>"Alex is so lucky to have you, unlike me... 'cus I've got nobody.""That's not true, you've-">"Why can't I get a man? I mean I'm totally hot, right? You think I'm attractive, don't you?""Uh... look, lets just get you home.">"Oh, I get it. Sure, your place or mine? Wait, your wife's probably home so we should go to mine.">Feeling the conversation rapidly getting away from him, Pogo did the only thing he could think of the quickly extradite himself from the situation as he pointed off behind Yuzu."Hey look, is that your dad?""Daddy!">As Yuzu span around and staggered for a moment, Pogo quickly hurried away and out the door into the street.
>>34015282BLAST! A daddy's girl's one weakness!
Sorry I passed out last night. Have a quick Myopia doodle.
>>34015919That's a cute dork you've got there. I'd totally give her a Werthers Original.
>>34015919prime cock sockery for grampa anon
>>33970507>Satyr implies human/goat hybrid.>Not Centaurs, whic are the human/horse hybrid.
>>34015919Cute grandbaby bat. Hope we'll get more.>>34015952Based old man.>>34016124Anon, that's lewd! Go on.
>>34016124Fuck off, you perv.
>>34015919>"Mom, if auntie Yuzu dies alone does that mean we get her money and ginormous house?""Myopia, that's a terrible thing to ask, but yes, probably.">"Bonkers, because having a pool would be nice!""Listen, your father works very hard for what we have and there are a lot of children out there with a lot less than you.">"I know, I am.""Besides, there's a good chance that if your auntie doesn't find someone by the time she retires she'll just use all that money of hers to go live on a tropical island somewhere to be waited on hand and hoof by hordes of hunky young men.">"Nuh-uh, because then she wouldn't get to see grandpa.""By then grandpa wouldn't be around any- Oh.">"What?""It's nothing, I just thought of something sad. Don't worry, just go play with your brother and keep him out of trouble. Where is Cardio anyway?">"He's out blowing up ant's nests with fireworks.""What?! He could blow off his fingers if he's not careful!"
>>34017140>does that mean we get her money and ginormous house?How rich is she exactly in you guys' opinions?
>>34017519Lawyers, especially big name ones, make bank, dude.
>>34017519Rich enough to own a large fully detached house in Ponyville with a pool, a garden and a good amount of private land in addition do a nice apartment in Manehattan where her work takes her from time to time.
>>34017579The amount of money she gives her niece and nephew for their birthdays is equal to their allowances the the entire rest of the year.
>>34017698Bullshit, my uncle's a lawyer and he gifts like he's on a 5$ budget.
>>34017705Oy vey, you're a greedy little schlomo. So ungrateful for your uncle Goldsein's generosity even though he scrimped and saved all year to afford that $5 for you.
>>34017717>5 bits? What do you need 2 bits for?!
>>34017719It's like anudda shoah. You'll be hearing from my lawyer about the ten Bits you still owe me!
>>34017140>"He's out blowing up ant's nests with fireworks."He better be careful so he doesn't blow up his antyr siblings.
>>34017863To the antyrs he is known only as "The Destroyer" who brings ruin upon all that they have built. They've taken to offering up their virgins and building mounds of sand in his image to appease him.
>>34017863After having his fireworks confiscated by his mother, Cardio decided instead to teach his pet budgie to ride a tech deck. He even built a little ramp for it out of cardboard.
>>34018094Boy knows what's up.
>>34017140Is she TRYING to turn Cardio gay?
>>34019217Well she is overprotective, and turning him gay would be a good way to keep him safe from thots and their lies.
>>34019714Statistically speaking, gays die younger because they tend to contract various disease from their overly promiscuous lifestyles.She'd be far better off setting him up an arranged marriage.
>>34019217"Cardio, I don't want you playing with that Batman toy anymore. His character sets far too violent of an example for a young boy.">"But-""Here, take this Captain Sweden action figure instead.">"Uh... thanks?">Looking at the tow with a frown, Cardio pulled the string coming from its back.>"Det är en svenskas uppgift att låta sin flickvän ha sex med en invandrare. och att betala för barnet. Svart kuk smakar bäst!">Cardio looked confused.>"I don't know what that means, but I'm pretty sure grandpa just got a cold chill down his spine."
>>34019764I think batgramps needs to ground Murmur again.
>>34019217"You know, I don't think dad would like it if he found out you were trying to turn his grandson gay.">"Excuse me? How many children do you have again, Yuzu? Oh right, zero. Please don't try and give me parenting advice when you know nothing about it yourself.""Well aren't you defensive about it.">"For your information I'm not trying to turn Cardio gay, I'm simply trying to show that I'd be supportive if he was.""What makes you think he could be?">"Well nothing really, except that he never shows any interest in girls.""He's eight.">"So? When I was eight I liked boys.""Yeah, but you always were a bit of a slut.">"I beg your pardon?!""Well maybe not anymore, but you used to be.">"How dare-""Look, it's no secret that you used to bring boys home and went all the way ever since you were thirteen.">"I... t-that's not-""Oh jeez, everybody knows, even dad. He just never intervened because he knew you were being safe about it and didn't want to embarrass you.">"Yeah, well, I'd rather be a slut than someone that never even kissed a guy until she was nineteen."From that point on it devolved into a petty catbatfight.
>>34021366"Yeah, but you always were a bit of a slut.">"Just because I was open about my sexuality that doesn't mean I was a slut.""Oh please, the only thing open about you was your legs for half the hoofball team during your senior year."
>"Damnit! Neighbors dogs tearing up the bushes aga-..Oh, it's just you, Laika.">"No, no, it's ok, honey; you go where ever it's comfortable, I don't mind.">'Get that neighbor girl out of my rhododendron's!'
Why would you zebra post OP? So many good Satyrs to pick and you come up with a mutt?
>>34023151Anything's better than the bat infestation
>>34023155No, no it isn't. I'll take bats over ziggers any day.
>>34023174ah hell nah das raycisgreen ass honkey tellin me i gotta pay n shiiet
>>34023174Zigzog is for bleaching on Lil' Mac's bwc.
>>34023155Now there's nothing wrong with batyrs. Just let them set up their colony in your attic and they'll mind their own business. They pay rent, keep mosquitoes away and don't play loud music late at night. You may have to go up there and snuggle the younger ones to keep them warm in the winter, but apart from that they're pretty self sufficient.
>>34023497>One day Anon pokes his head up into his attic."So hey girls, I hate to ask, but are you running a brothel up here or something?">The senior most girl laughs nervously.>"W-What? Ha, no way! That'd be, you know... illegal and stuff.""Uh-huh, it's just because I've been hearing all sorts of noises lately.">"There's certainly nothing like that happening up here, honest... unless you were perhaps interested in that sort of thing."
>>34023532It's just sisters lezzing out a bit. Girls do that sometimes.
>>34023568Well they are a very socially orientated satyr sub-species that tend to prefer living together in large family colonies. There are of course exceptions to this.
>>34023643Give your baby bats lots of baby bats and headpats.
Boop your satyrfu awak. Just because it's summer doesn't mean they can fall into an insane sleep pattern.
What is satyr's favorite fighting game? Any of them have a main?
>>34025290Bucky dominates with the kanoball. Always fear a high ranked playing a low tier.
>>34025290Barry plays a lot of Mortal Kombat.
>>34023568Well how else are they supposed to establish dominance and social hierarchy?
>>34025290y'all niggas better be playing Skullgirlshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=58NKCwjz6e8
>>34025764Could always lavish attention on daddy for his approval for whoever's on top at a given time.
esus, batyrs are weak sauce, like, every single one of them are princess like or attention whores.What other thing does have this shitty thread?, come on, show me some more satyr ladies!
>>33970507Who is the qt zebra?
>>34025764>>34025785Way to make it weird, as usual.
>>34026135They're (adorable) abominations. Normalcy was probably never on the table.
>>34025764Trial by stone.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPv2I-mArD8
>>34026482"Hey, keep it down up there!">Anon cringes at the sound of yet more clashing of metal."Oh for goodness sake, I said-">Poking his head through the hatch to his attic, Anon pauses mid sentence as he surveys they strange sight before him.>At least twenty batyrs stand gathered in a large circle watching as two of them take turns swinging swords at a large lump of rock with swords."What the hell is this shit? Hey, I said keep it down!">The crowd turns towards him in surprise, not having heard him up until now."Do you have any idea what time it is? Some of us have work tomorrow.">The crowd parts and forward steps a tiny little loli bat sniffling sadly and with large puppy-dog eyes welling up with tears.>"We're real sorry mister. Y-You're not gonna kick us out, are you?">Oh crap, cuteness, Anon's one weakness.>Peering at her adorable face, Anon reluctantly sighed."No, of course not, sweetie, but if you could tell the others to keep the noise down a little I'd be very happy."
Am I the only one that could easily see Mistake doing great as a nursery teacher? I get the feeling she'd be good with kids. What other jobs do you think certain satyrs would be naturally good at?
>>34026931Honestly, I like that headcanon. I still see her getting with batdad, and all those buglings taught her she's a natural with kids and figured she could get some cash to do what she'd be doing anyway.
>>34026931The kids love her because when she reads them during story time she morphs into the character's she speaking as, though she's not very good at doing the voices.
>>34027137Kids don't mind the voice that much. The showman ship enamors them, though.And lets not forget her neoteny making her seem not like a mean ol' adult to children she's watching, but a big, cool kid.
I see Mistake put the smalls down for a nap so she could go cuddle her man.
>>34025494I can definitely see his brother being a Sub Zero player.
>>34028102As long as he's not a wifi warrior one.
>>34028588He plays him because he thinks he's pretty cool
>>34027137>"Miss, Miss, I wrote a story!""You did? That's wonderful, Billy.">"Can you read it to the class and turn into the main character?""Of course I can. Here, pass it to me and I can read it for storytime after show and tell.">Mistake glanced down at the piece of paper and read the title written in crayon."Totally naked Tiffany... with big boobies?">She looked back at Billy."I think I may need to call your parents."
>>34029633>"I think I may need to call your parents, because your handwriting and spelling have really improved. Good job, you get a shiny banana sticker!"
>tfw had a dream of Mistake getting dicked good and hard by Dadnon
>>34030036Where on the ahegao scale did she fall?
>>34030045She had her v card taken in the dream so it was more a pained wince but struggling with the pleasure.Seemed to have been a dream of a prompt I had that Mistake kept telling Anon she was ready to be a wife/gf to him and Anon saying she didnt know what she is signing up for. But he gives her the dicking
>>34030074>she didnt know what she is signing up forShe has a habit of biting off more than she can chew.
>>34026931It could be awkward for her meeting the parents, seeing as most of them assume she's a highschool student and ask her where the teacher is.
>>34030074That sounds really sweet.She was still really naive, but Anon's seen this girl pine for him for so long that it'd be cruel to not at least give her a chance after she's wanted it for so long.
>>34030280>Someone hits on you for years>Turn them down consistently because they're too young>They come of age, still want you.Why not at least give 'em a shot?And why am I asking you? You'll bitch no matter what because you legitimately have nothing going on in your life.
>>34030422Don't bother replying to him.
>>34030422to be fair I think most anons also had some bantz that Anon still didnt pursue Mistake until a couple of years after she came of age thinking she'd just move on. But never did and still showed interest in him. Its a nice slow burn with more deep intimacy to it but the usual suspects just strawman it and leave out many details.
>>34030437Personally I still prefer the idea of batdad getting with Laika's mom who's got it going on, but I do like the idea of a more slow burn romance between him and Mistake.>>34026931>What other jobs do you think certain satyrs would be naturally good at?On the subject of Laika, I could see her being a firefighter though I'm not sure exactly why.
>>34030462>I'm not sure exactly why.Firehouse doggo Laika?Do tell? Can she smell people through the smoke and fire?>>34030451But Complain-sempai, Yuzu's always wanted Missy to succeed.
>>34030462>Personally I still prefer the idea of batdad getting with Laika's momYou my brother from another mother. I love that and consider it my prime head canon for him but the Mistake Dadnon is my favorite forbidden age diff fruit.
>>34030470>Do tell? Can she smell people through the smoke and fire?No, she's just naturally athletic, likes smashing through doors with a fire axe and getting praised for rescuing people and doing a good job. It's like playing fetch but with people and the added thrill of being in a burning building. She's a good service dog.
>>34030462>batdad getting with Laika's momNeatly trimmed MILF pubes.
>>34030564Thanks anon I was looking for this pic but could not find it
>>34030564>"Why'd you pull out? Do you have any idea how annoying it is to wash cum out?""Because I can't afford another kid at my age."
How pushy do you think the Rarity satyrs are when it comes to selling fancy outfits to otherwise pretty mundane people?
>>34031139Sapphire tells them how hot/handsome they are in it and it could help catch the eye of that special somep0ny. Unaware that most of the time their special somep0ny is her. Highest refund rate but also biggest seller.Garnet would sell them on the practicality of their clothes and how it will benefit them with moving up in status or clout. Not a big seller but his buyers always come back for more. In the long run he beats out his sister
>>34030437Agreed.It's not like she hit 18 and he went and popped her cherries then and there.There were some dates, some romance. He wanted to make sure her attention really wasn't some weird kid fixation. And when it was time, Mistake was happy to alleviate Anon's empty nest syndrome.
>>34032791I figured she was a late 19 almost 20 when they did seal the deal. And Anon was probably worried about the age difference and if he was robbing the cradle. But he took a chance, not many women stood by him like this. It was really moving to him when she didnt waiver.
>>34032828I bet he still reminisces on their date that night.So, what do you figure is Mistake's very particular thing she likes him to do? Fetish perhaps. I've got this thought of her liking when he runs his fingers along the grooves of her chitin plates, teasing the delicate flesh between them. It can make a night of cuddling either really close, or very sensual depending on her mood.
>>34032828>not many women stood by him like thisBecause Anons like you pretty much keeps saying that both Yuzu and Mistake keeps ruining every relationship he's in. Yuzu because she apparently hates every female that is not Mistake, and Mistake because she's autistically obsessed with BatAnon alone for no real reason.
Does Mistake have any see through belly chitin? Does Anon have a morbid curiosity seeing his little wifey's insides?
>>34035257There is a very rare period where she molts and her bug parts become very soft and clear like. She's really embarrased about that period and will not leave the house both for safety and to avoid people knowing. So he probably would ask her to spread her legs wide for her and let him feel her up. And get a nice look behind the chitin curtain.
>>34035273That's actually kinda sweet. Finding a way to make her feel pretty during what's a very awkward time for her.That's one thing she didn't even think about as a boon from being with an older man. He's past the point of basic squick, and not only doesn't mind the molting, but will help her get the old shell off and clean up.
>>34035295ye she tries to play it off but it flusters her up when he still lays on the love and romance even in what she considers her ugliest. And if it wasnt for him she would not have found out how sexually sensitive she is during that time. And he likes to tease her with little butt slaps to see her jiggle like jello
>>34035336He only has a day or two when the shell is soft and pliable, but not brittle before it begins to harden up.But during that time, she's so sensitive it's unreal. I can see him learning how to massage just to be able to push her to a screaming orgasm without ever touching her sexually.
>>34036275You know, I tried drawing an older Mistake, but she ended up still looking really young. Maybe her looks don't change much as she ages?
>>34036291Thats how i see it shes just a young looking shortstack
>>34036291She'll always look real young, but once she's away from Catrine, she'd probably get a very modest bust and a nice, palmable booty.
>>34036291>>34036349Hmmm...well, here's the picture in question anyway. Mistake at around the age of 20-23. Could use some tweaking I'm sure, but I just doodled her as warm up earlier.
>>34036374So thin...So it gives me a little bit of a headcanon idea.We're looking at a late 23 Missy. After they had some kids, she got hit with post-partum really hard, and lost a lot of weight from just refusing to eat.And this is a picture from the day she first started to really feel better. She out of the blue decided she'd like to get out of the house and visit the park, which he was happy to do with her, just glad to see her moving about. And he took this happy pic.
>>34036374a bit wonky but a cutie non the less
>>34036499Very cute, yes. Bug looks very happy.
>>34036374"Hey, want to go grab a snack, Missy?">"No that's okay, I had a slice of avocado less than sixteen hours ago."
>>34036495>So thin>>34036955Yeah, I'm a bit out of practice.I've been drawing mainly pearls for the Steven Universe general for the last year, and they're sticcs.
>>34037540I can imagine. Well glad you are still sticking around. Your art is super cute. A bit off topic but how is life?
>>34037561Not bad. Still working. Trying to make time to draw when I can, but during the summer months, time can be a rare commodity. Been dating a girl I met in an art store for 5 months now and things are going very well with us.
>>34037644Best of luck u crazy art lad u
>>34037644Hey, good to hear man. Hope things work out with you two.
>>34036374Murmur "innocently" asks her if she's put on a few pounds.>"W-Why, do I look fat?""Oh no, of course not! Look, just forget I said anything. I mean some men like chubby girls."
>>34037714Doesn't matter if Murmur's 20 at that point, batdad's gonna put her over his knee for that one.
>>34039989Little ginger stripes~
>>34037714"You know I don't think I've ever said this before, Mistake, but I've really come to admire you.">"Huh?""Yeah, I mean eating a whole sandwich at this time of day. It's just so brave of you to send such a clear message to society that you don't care about your figure and that you'll eat whatever you want.">"My figure?""Oh yeah, it's refreshing to see a girl that doesn't feel the need to follow the trends of what's conventionally considered attractive. I'd never have the confidence to do what you do and just let it all hand out.">"Oh, uh... would you excuse me for a moment, I have to go use the bathroom.""Sure, I'll be here.">Murmur waited until her companion was out of earshot before rolling her eyes."Dumb anorexic bitch."Mistake then spent the next ten minutes throwing up and hating herself for being such a disgusting fatty.
I want to see Lil' Mac and Asha's adorable little spawn.>>34040404This is not alright.There's teasing, there's bullying, and then there's psychological torture.I feel like this'd get the type of reprisal that'd make her worry just a bit if she made dad stop loving her.
>>34040415Maybe Murmur really is just kind of a bitch. If questioned, she could always play innocent and say that she really meant what she said about admiring Mistake and that she TOTALLY didn't mean to imply she was fat and that Mistake just misinterpreted what she was saying.
>>34040495Girl needs Jesus.
>>34040495"No, what I mean was that I admired how she had the confidence to be so skinny even though some people may think it makes her look unhealthy."
>>34040404Later that day."Well that's just crazy, there's no way that would work.">"What?">Murmur waved the magazine she'd been reading."It says in here that the lasted trend in Canterlot involves teens cutting themselves as a method of fast weight loss.">"Oh?""Apparently the body burns a lot of calories to heal itself and all the fashion models are doing it.">"Really?""That's what it says.">Murmur smiled."You know, Yuzu was right, you are fun to hang out with. Maybe tomorrow we can go clothes shopping together.">"I don't know, maybe-""It's fine, most places have a plus size section these days."Bully the bug.
>>34040524You can't just bully your stepmom like that.
>>34041043For what, all bat's all the time?
>>34041052They're in the rafters, dude! Your daughterus watch you sleep!
>>34040530"No daddy, I was really serious about liking Mistake's company.">"And the plus size comment?""That was for me, not her. I mean do you even know how hard it is to find stylish clothes that fit when you have hips like mine?"
>>34042036"Don't lie to me, Murmur. She's my wife, and the mother of your new siblings. I expect you to get along with her. Now you two French kiss and make up."