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Previous Thread: >>3348027

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First for lewdest horse
>>Copy wrong address
My bad lol
Yeeeeah butter my mother girl
She's also a virgin looking for that special colt because the idea of multiple lovers is really gross because element of loyalty.
>Date: 2012
>"My internet is really problematic at the moment"
Oh, you. Oh you, Anon.
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>Enter Anon
>A man from a monogamous society and looking for a stable source of comfort to help him through the trying time of adjusting to his new life
>"He's all alone, Applejack. No friends, no family, no nothin'. Maybe an impromptu airshow would distract him a bit."
>Anon makes the mistake ("mistake") of petting Rainbow Dash anywhere other than the top of her head
>Her pegasus biology kicks in
>Months later, other mares stare on in jealousy as Anon and Rainbow Dash have a picnic together, both of them exclusive to one-another
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I can sexually frustrate a parrot for years until their worsened behavior becomes an excuse to hand them off to a nicer home so I don't have to endure their entire lifespan? Convince me not to do this. Please.
Having had several pets that inevitably die before I do, I admit that it's tempting.
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>ywn unknowingly seduce several pegasus mares
>ywn wake up in bed covered in chirping and cooing pegasus mares who cover you with the warm blanket of their wings
>ywn have light, hollow-boned pegasus mares casually roost on your shoulders as you go about your day
>ywn receive gifts of shiny or brightly colored objects from your flock of pegasus mares throughout the day, given to you with the most earnest smile you've ever seen on their faces
>ywn reward them with a (apparently sensual) massage, including wing-massages and hoof-rubbing
You sicko. Get that X-rated stuff out of here.
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I always see stuff about bird herd snuggles which I'm not complaining about but I'm more partial to unicorn awkwardness myself.
>Regularly poked with horns
>The mares float stuff around them at a certain range and height and have to retrain themselves so they don't smack you with their stuff as they walk down the street
>More issues with the horn considering where their head height is
>Tries to sneak in drunk late at night with a teleport spell, but botches it so it sounds like an artillery shell going off in your living room
>Can't make them sleep on the couch because they can make the couch nicer than your bed with magic
>maybe even more than male teenagers
>implying female teenagers aren't just as horny
>implying male teenagers are the only teenagers who experience hormone surges
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lmao imagine believing this
Teenage girls are fucking skanks, dude. Are you high?
Fuck I guess I must've been absent on all those skank days
Aww man you didn't get one of the flyers?
The couch isn't a punishment because it's uncomfortable. The couch is a punishment because now you're sleeping alone instead of cuddled up with your herd.
Now that kind of has me thinking.
>Herd goes out drinking and comes back to make a mess
>Anon says they can all sleep on the couch
>Now they're in one big snuggle pile while he's alone alone in an oversized bed
That's why you only send out one.
>Suddenly, every drunken night becomes an emotional roulette game where each mare can't be sure it's not her that sleeps cold tonight.
>Best play it safe and not drink so much...
And every pone who doesn't drink much or at all is basically automatically safe, and increases the drinkers odds of being couched.
New 'non here. I WISH they had flyers. It would be like pizza day at school.
Continuing on from: https://pastebin.com/LGunmyGJ

>And you cough.
>And again, you heave, trying to expel the water from your lungs.
>With a glance, you can tell your on the bank of the lake, watched by a few passers-by.
“Son of a...”
>You throw up the last of the fresh water in your lungs and roll onto your back, staring up at the orange glow of the Manehatten sky.
>”Anonymous? Are you alright.”
>Luna's voice snaps you from your malaise.
>Waving your hand to dismiss her for a moment, you cough up the last of the water in your lungs and collapse once again into the dirt.
>For a few seconds, neither of you say anything, as you run through another of your deaths.
>But the silence must be broken, and you open your mouth
“So who won?”


>Turns out you did, if that's any consolation.
>The two of you managed to limp in each other's arms... Hooves. Whatever, managed to limp back to The Colton Ritz. The receptionist seemed to give a nod to Luna as she watched her drag your near comatose ass through the doors and back to your two separate rooms.
“I dreamed I was old Egg.” You moan.
>”Of course you did.”
“Hey? You putting me to bed right?”
>Now it's her turn to moan.
>”Yes. Please shut up. We can smell your breath from here.”
“Don't forget I need my sleeping pills. I don't wanna dream. I don't like dreaming.”
>This admittance seems to perturb the Princess of the Night.
>”Why is that?”
“You ever dream about dying over and over and over and over...”
>”We get it.”
“Well imagine that. Every time you try to sleep. And you feel everything. And you now know that it actually happened to you.”
>”That sounds... Awful Anon.”
>You stroke the pretty horse.
“You ever been in a place you know you can't stay? But that you know you can't leave?”
>”Stop trying to be depressed. That was our problem...”
>She realises what she just said.
>”Nightmare Moon's problem.”
“Eyyyyy. You admitted....”
>”Go to sleep.”
>You realise now you are in front of your room in the hotel, and Luna opens it with her magic.
>She throws you off her back and onto the comfy bed, and you start to moan as you wrap yourself within its confines.
>”You just said you need pills.”
>You feel something smack you in the head. Unwrapping yourself from the covers you grab a small plastic bottle.
>You reach out towards the bedside table and grab a glass of water, take a single pill into your hand and swallow it.
>Should take a minute or two to work.
>”Do you really hate dreaming?”
>You turn to Luna who has broken the spell that hides her wings.
“I'm afraid of it. At least I know why I am doing it this time.”
>You desperately wish to change the subject as she looks at you strangely.
“So? We teleporting to Fillydelphia tomorrow?”
>She continues to look at you strangely for a few moments before slowly nodding her head.
>”Tomorrow. Tonight we should both sleep off our drunkenness and inevitable hangovers.”
>She moves to leave but before the consuming shadow of drug-induced sleep consumes you once more you shout out to her.
>She turns.
>There's something you want to say. Something you want to tell her. Something you want to admit.
>And those words are
“Can we wake up at, like, ten or so? I'm fucking buzzed and tired at the same time.”
>Truly, you are a poet laureate. You can hear your ancestors clapping their approval at your hallowed and honest words. But like all geniuses, you aren't appreciated in your time, and the princess of the Night merely nods her head and tells you to go to sleep.
>Not that you need the incentive as the inky blackness of prescription medication takes you.

>Luna found you the next morning staring dead-eyed in the bar, a glass of water before you and your bags packed beneath you.
>She glances at a clock.
>”It's nine o'clock. We had expected you to either be throwing up or still asleep.”
“Woke up at five. I don't sleep anymore. I just...”
>”Enough of that. Some of us do sleep.”
“Fair enough. You able to eat solid food?”
>She shook her head.
“Yeah, me neither. I might manage a sandwich come sundown. How much did we drink last night?”
>Luna chuckles behind her hoof for a moment before answering.
>”Enough that we thought it was a good idea to dive into the Central Park lake.”
“Well, that sounds stupid, but...”
>”From fifteen hundred feet.”
>Taking a moment to blink, you check your body to make sure it's in one piece.
“How am I alive? Wait, that explains the whole Arctic thing.”
>”Arctic thing?”
“Long story. I had a vision of another life, me drowning. So that was fun.”
>”Anyone ever tell you you're quite depressing hungover?”
“I wouldn't remember.”
>”Lucky you.”
>A low chuckle rumbles in your throat
“Anyone ever tell you-you're a cunt hungover?”
>”Not in so few words, no. My Sister always had some choice words for me after mornings out.”
“Mornings out?”
>Luna rolls her eyes and shifts her hips to show off her disguised cutie mark, still looking like the moon.
>”We used to sleep during the day and work at night. And if we wanted to party or celebrate, we'd go out during the day.”
“Must've been hard to party and socialise when everyone is working.”
>”More than you know.”
>You realise, perhaps, the catalysts that created Nightmare Moon. The small stumbles before the great fall.
>Eager to change the conversation, you run a hand through your growing mess of hair, past your unshaven beard.
“Ever been to Fillydelphia?”
>”No. Not even the small village it was a thousand years ago. I rarely left the castle in those days."
>It all went back to a thousand years ago didn't it?
>Well, you could hardly blame her. For her, that might have felt like just a month or two ago.
>Or she was Nightmare Moon, as you know she was, and it actually felt like a thousand years and she was just suppressing that part of herself that knew that.
>Not that you were one to talk on suppressing uncomfortable truths.
>God, you were depressing when hungover. Or sober. Or drunk.
“You packed?”
>Truly a master of the conversational arts.
>You desperately think of something else to talk about. Anything. The weather? How disrespectful kids were today? What was the deal with the whole reverse gender...
>Or maybe you really ought to ask her about Nightmare Moon. Honestly. Allow her to admit that she did those terrible things and that because she has admitted that she can seek honest forgiveness for her crimes. That she needn't feel a guilt she cannot admit. And she can be set free.
>But instead what falls from your lips is
“Better pack.”
>You hate yourself sometimes.
>Luna nods tiredly, wearily.
>”We suppose so.”
>You smile, a weak hollow thing pulling at the right side of your face.
>This wasn't Luna. Not truly. This small pony with a simple teal mane and dark blue Skin. From your past life, you knew she was supposed to every bit as majestic and ethereal as her sister. But here she was. Barely up to your waist. Only the wings and horn both might have given away what she was supposed to be, and her wings were hidden.
>You want to comfort her a little. You do feel guilty for things you had done you can barely remember.
>But you are quite sure that this gesture would not be accepted.
>So you drink your water, and clear your throat, like the coward you are.

>Steadying yourself with your enormous bag on your bag, you stand as close as you dare to the Mare, focusing all her might into her glowing, sparking horn. You can taste Ozone on the air, watch the magic spark off any metal nearby.
>And then all of a sudden, like one of her sister's brilliant sunrises you are struck by the light.
>For a moment, all you can perceive, all you are, is a white void.
>Form and time and meaning decay into that same void, folding and unfolding across perfectly straight lines of infinite curvature.
>And as soon as it began, the moment you try and reach out for something, anything to confirm your reality, colours, heart and smells rush towards you.
>And you stumble on your feet, planting your hands against a wall to steady yourself.
>Feeling the red brick beneath your fingers, and tasting the salt in the air, hearing the low moan of a city, you can confirm your reality.
>You cough, and turn to face Luna, watching you with a curious eye.
>”We tried to keep you upright and on the ground this time.”
>You chuckle once you can confirm your lungs are really there.
“I appreciate the effort.”
>You have decided that as useful as it is, you really do not like teleporting.
>Looking around, to your untrained eye it just looks like you're in yet another back alley in some city. For half a heartbeat you hope to yourself selfishly that it is one on earth, but looking towards the end you can see ponies walking by.
“Are we definitely in Fillydelphia?”
>Luna looks equally unsure.
>”We shall ask. You stay here and recover. You look as if you might empty your stomach.”
>Just as well you didn't eat anything.
>Turning your body you slide down the wall, you shirt scratching against the brick as you do so.
>You wait patiently for a few moments as 'Midnight Shadow' heads onto the main street and tries to politely ask for confirmation and directions.
>The next few minutes pass as Luna asks about directions politely and the mares and Stallions argue rudely in return.
>This was taking too long for your liking.
>Standing up you made your way towards her and tried desperately to remember what Shining Armor once told you of the sports teams of this world.
“Oi! You!”
>You shout as you arrive onto the Main street, immediately catching the glare of a passing Mare, both because you were a six foot something alien, but also because you were rudely pointing at her.
>The red Pegasus glares at you with the fury of a neutron star.
>”Fuck you!”
>Well that was sudden. Still...
“Fuck you! The Eagles suck!”
>”Fuck you say Stallion!?”
>She starts to try and get up in your face, which barely works for the 3ft something mare.
“Fuck you!”
>”Fuck you!”
>Well, Fillydelphia confirmed.
>You allow the mare to keep kicking and biting you as you turn back to Luna and shrug.
“Rude, Pissed off at me insulting the Eagles, trying to fight me. We're in Fillydelphia.”
>Luna cannot quite form words at this point. She glances towards the Mare still trying to fight you and pulls her off with her telekinesis.
>”Enough of that. You have been most helpful Ma'am.”
>The Pegasus tries once more to fight you, trying to dive-bomb you and smack you in the head, but Luna's horn glows and the Mare teleports away.
>... At least you hope that was a teleport. The chance it may have been Luna banishing her to the Moon or Sun or something wasn't quite out of the question.
“She'll be alright right?”
>Luna shrugs.
>God you hope you've not just been made an accessory to murder.
“She's okay right?”
>Luna shrugs again, a smug grin growing on her snout.
“Please at least tell me she's alive.”
>Finally Luna breaks her smug silence.
>”She's probably fine. I just teleported her.”
>Well, given your experiences with that, fine was relative.

>Finding a sadly much cheaper hotel quickly, rather than waste time drinking (especially while the two of you were still a bit hungover) you leapt into trying to find where exactly Gleamshine lived exactly.
>Without computers, this leads you to an ancient and lost tome that perhaps should have stayed buried. An eldritch thing of depth and design, inscribed with barely legible words and numbers that seemed to consume the light and warmth of whatever space the book was kept in.
>So foul were those pages that they had been stained a foul yellow as if dipped into some unearthly ichor.
>”It's just an address book.” Says Luna, breaking the silence.
>An address book.
>Well at least it wasn't a phone book.
>It was quite difficult to find Gleamshine. You figured at her age she probably wasn't living on her own, so while Luna teleported between Old Folk's homes in the City to perhaps try and find her there you had to try and trace her family tree, birth records and the like and see if she had family in the city she was staying with.
>While Luna's search had been fruitless and gotten her nothing but being forced to try and listen to a few old people pretending to be her for some human... Pony? Pony contact, yours had finally turned up something.
>A daughter, Mirror Sheen (a name somehow worse than Gleamshine of all things) had a house in the city. You would bet a hundred bits that if Gleamshine was anywhere, it was there.
>And you actually did. Luna took that bet. Hopefully, it'd be the easiest 100 bits you'd ever make.
>Time to find out.
>Stepping out of the hotel, your white shirt buttoned up, a cheap clip-on tie and a paper pad to complete the disguise, the two of you make your way through the Fillydelphia streets once more. You having refused outright anymore teleporting.
>Luna, or 'Midnight Shadow', had not bothered with any disguise more than her illusionary cutie mark and hiding her wings again.
“Why the wings?”
>You nod towards her invisible or non-existent (you weren't quite sure which) wings.
>”Oh... Well, we figured being able to use telekinesis without getting strange looks was the smarter choice.”
“Aren't you getting strange looks anyway?”
>You motion towards the several pedestrians staring up at you in disgust and confusion.
>”Well, you are. We're merely an accessory to strange looks.”
“Smartass.” You grumble, walking ahead and flicking her in the snout as you pass her.
>At least for once you were the one in charge of the map.
>And you used this opportunity to stay well out of reach of any possible retaliation on her part.
>You dodged the telekinetic wedgies, the attempted smacks against your ass, even her straight up just trying to charge at you.
>At least until you finally arrived at the address, a two-story house on the outskirts of the city. The garden hadn't been mown in quite a while, long grass at least up to your knees proving that. Curtains were drawn on the upper floor, but not on the first. But it was a cosy place. The door was painted red, hearts etched into the woodwork.
>When you came to a stop Luna pulled your trousers down with her magic, to which you booped her and pulled them back up before knocking on the door.
>A middle-aged tan coated mare with enormous brown eyes and curly brown hair looks at your crotch and follows the rest of you to look in your eyes, stepping back once she realises how tall you are.
>You don't want to scare her, so you carefully smile so that you don't show your canines and speak in a low calming voice. Your best bureaucratic voice.
“Hello. I'm with the Royal government trying to tie up a few loose ends concerning one...”
>You pretend to flip through your empty notepad.
“Brightsmile. We believe that a good friend of his is staying here, and we want to sort out a small inheritance matter.”
>Once the mare gets over your no doubt strange appearance she sighs.
>”I haven't heard that name for a while. Father never liked mother talking about him. Even when she was not the primary mare in his herd, he never liked hearing he was second best in her eyes.”
>Well, that was a revelation. Past you probably banged Gleamshine. The thought... Is one you should save and figure out for another time.
“Is your mother in Mrs Sheen?”
>”Miss Sheen. Damn Stallion ran off with some floozy from Baltimare. Yeah, my Mother is in. So, what can we stand to get?”
>You cough as Luna looks towards you expectedly, willing to just allow you to lie your way in.
“That's what we need to discuss with her preferably. If you and she are willing I'd love to get an interview. We have to confirm identities you see.”
>Mirror Sheen glares into you for a few seconds, glances at Luna, sighs, and steps aside.
>You pass the threshold into the house.
>”Gleam's eyesight ain't too good anymore, so if you have pictures or anything to show run it by me.”
“That shouldn't be an issue.”
>Because you were lying out of your ass.
>She leads you up the stairs, the two of you chatting politely while Luna simply watches until you come across a room at the end of a darkened corridor.
>”I'll just see if she's awake.”
>As Mirror Sheen steps inside your hands begin to shake ever so slightly. Talking to someone who knew your past life intimately was... Strange. You knew lots of people in Canterlot who knew Brightsmile, but they knew the Butler. Gleamshine knew the man he used to be. And that worried you. Being younger, he was far closer to the man you are now.
>”Surprised we haven't run into any of your bastards yet.” Luna said sarcastically.
>You're too tense to respond, or even bring up the impossibility of that.
>The door opens, and Mirror Sheen's head pops out.
“She's awake. You can come in.”
>With a deep breath, you enter the darkened room.
>The first thing you notice is the decorations. What looks like a gramophone, but with a round tube on it instead of a flat disc sits on a bedside table. Newspapers hang from the room. And to your discomfort, at least two of the seven have you upon them.
>Not you as you are now, but you recognise now the Stallion that replaced your dead body on that balcony in Canterlot. Brightsmile.
>The curtains are pulled back by Mirror Sheen, and as they are you notice the old mare in the bed. Her eyes are nearly milky white, her cheeks gaunt, and she seems to look towards whatever made the last noise, but some part of you recognises the mare. You had seen her in your dreams. A younger version, but her none the less.
>You spot two chairs at the foot of the bed and one beside, opposite the table. You nod to Luna and she returns it, and the two of you sit in those chairs, uncomfortably for you.
>Mirror Sheen sits by her mother, places a hoof against her head and smiles before speaking in a soft voice.
>”Mother. There are people from the royal court here to talk to you.”
>”Royal... Royal court? And you let them see me like this.”
>Her voice is brittle and torn, scratched and wavering, but you recognise it. Not consciously, but certainly. This was the mare that helped you back on your feet when you arrived in Equestria. This is the Mare that helped you rip off the Mafia and then helped you escape them. This is the mare you fell in love with for two years before parting.
>You daren't speak for a moment, your voice taken from you, lost to memories.
>But Luna is glancing at you pointedly, as is Mirror Sheen.
>You cough to clear your throat and speak.
“Mrs Gleamshine. I'm from...”
>”Brightsmile? Is that you?”
>She tries to sit up in her bed. Tries so hard. But the years had been harsh on both of you. Father time has his way with us all. And while you can't remember, she can't forget. It's a shame she's remembering the wrong things.
>”No Mother. This isn't Brightsmile. He's... What did you say your name was?”
>You wipe something from your eye and turn to her daughter.
>”Mr Anonymous.” Mirror Sheen repeats.
>”Oh. Of course. You told me that he was dead. But the two of you sound so similar.” Gleamshine mumbles.
>Her milk-white eyes fall upon you, but you remember the brown ones that looked so shocked at your appearance once.
“Mrs... Mrs Gleamshine. Were you friends with Brightsmile? Before he parted?”
>A soft, genuine nostalgic smile grows on the old mare's face.
>”I couldn't go to his party. Or his funeral. But yes, we were good friends.”
“How did you meet?”
>”He appeared in my apartment one morning. About sixty years ago. Just out of thin air. He was so confused.”
>Mirror Sheen shoots you an apologetic glance.
>”He just teleported in by accident and got knocked in the head...”
>”Brightsmile didn't teleport. Always hated it.”
>Gleamshine tried again to sit up, batting away her daughter's hoof to try and look at you in the eyes, for what good that did.
>”He came from another World. Another place, another time. I know because he was so... strange.”
>She seems confused on that last word, like she's trying to remember something despite all her mind and soul telling her not to. Like it hurts to remember that last fact.
>”She's confused. She's just...”
>You interrupt Mirror Sheen's excuse, writing furiously in your notepad as you stare into Gleamshine's empty eyes.
“What makes you say that? That he came from another world?”
>Gleamshine shakes her head slowly.
>”He had weird ideas about Stallions and Mares. He would always pay for our drinks and dinners. I miss that. He was such a gentlemare... It was strange.”
“Is that all? What about his height? Can you tell me what he looked like?”
>”What's going on here?”
>Mirror Sheen moves to shout at you, or maybe hit you, but Luna steps in.
>”Anonymous was just asking the standard questions. It's to help with memory recollection.”
>You smile apologetically at the daughter you could have had once before returning to Gleamshine.
“Do you remember if he went by any other name? Do you remember him talking about England? About his parents?”
>”I... Another Name.”
>The question makes Gleamshine pause. She seems to chew on it for a few moments before looking to the gramophone like device on her right.
>”You can hear it for yourself.”
>You turn as white as a sheet as you look to the device. It was one thing to read your words. To dream your lives and death. But she was implying...
>”I'll get the Phonograph going...”
>She smacks it with her hoof as hard as she can, and the thing spins to life.
>”So wait, you spent your earnings on this?”
>Your eyes widen, even Luna glances from the machine to you.
>As cracked and staticy as it is, that's your voice coming from the cylinder and speaker.
>”Why not? I'm recording right now.”
>That voice was unmistakably Gleamshine's. Gone was the aches and wounds of age, replaced by the vigour and sweetness of youth.
>”Right now? Huh. That is cool.”
>”I thought they had these things in your world?”
>Gleamshine and Mirror Sheen both have turned towards you, recognising your voice coming from that speaker, but your eyes are glued to the phonograph.
>”Sure. But I've never seen an old-timey version. Bet it sounds like shit.”
>”Probably. So what'd you spend your earnings on?”
>”Something sensible.”
>”We can't all strut around naked all the time like you.”
>”You do it enough around here.”
>”Fair enough.”
>You can almost imagine the conversation taking place, almost remember the low glow of the oil lantern in that shitty apartment. Almost remember the exhilaration of cheating and winning your first poker game.
>Your hands begin to shake, your brow begins to sweat, but you keep listening.
>”So, we doing anything tonight?” The static voice of a younger Gleamshine asks.
>”I dunno. I'm feeling like staying in. Maybe ordering something Haytalian.”
>”Should we stop recording?”
>”Well, unless future you wants to listen to us chowing down on greasy pizza, probably.”
>”Pizza? Really? Are you sure...”
>There's a pregnant pause, and for a moment you fear that was the end of the recording. But then, the recording of Gleamshine says a final word.
>And then it stops. The needle moves down the cylinder, scratching at tearing slightly at it as it finishes its course.
>You and Gleamshine turn to each other, and even in her blind eyes, you see the recognition within. And it's as if a great veil has been lifted. Her older, tired voice repeats those same words her younger self just said, with even more trepidation, but with even more certainty.
>And you fall back.
>When you awaken back in that darkened room, you are alone.
>You cannot say why. You shouldn't be. You were surrounded by others when you fell unconscious.
>You stand up and turn, trying to find anyone. As you do so you feel the room stretch in all directions, the walls moving away from you.
“Where am I?”
>”Where we all go.”
>A tired but familiar voice breaks the silence. You peer into the dark, and an old man steps out of the shadows.
>You recognise his hair, his face, his piercing green eyes. For you see them in every reflection, every mirror.
“Are you...”
>”You would know me best as Brightsmile. It is how most of them remember me. I am luckier than most in that regard, however. I am remembered. Hundreds of us die too quickly or never meet her to get that opportunity.”
>Celestia. He's talking about her.
>”Come. Sit with me a while.”
>The scenery changes, and gone are the shadows and the wooden floor beneath you. You find yourself standing on a marble balcony, the setting sun casting its dying orange glow across a great landscape.
>You... Your older copy sits on a bench on the balcony, groaning to himself as he does so. You move to sit beside him.
>”I lived a long time. Longer than anyone else, if you can believe that. I was ready to go.”
>You let him talk.
>”I... I wasn't scared. A lot of us are. So terrified of where we'll end up. To think, the answer is nowhere at all.”
>He turns to you.
>”And right where we left off.”
“I... I'm trying to remember. All of them.”
>”You're the first. The Wanderer didn't want to risk forgetting mother and father. Their faces. The beast in the Long Grass had darker ideas of his place in the universe. And I...”
>He leans back, managing to find the most comfortable way to sit. For a moment he glances to the rising moon and smiles as he notices it unblemished, unscarred.
>”I had no idea. I thought it was simply the end. I had a long... Decent life. Not brilliant. But not bad.”
“Hundreds turned up for your funeral.”
>”Not mine. Brightsmile's. You are me Anonymous.”
>He turns back to you, staring into identical eyes.
>”And I am you. Remember that.”
“I'm trying to. I don't want to forget.”
>Your older self laughs.
>”Maybe after today things will be a little easier on that front. But there's no need to rush. Let's just enjoy the sunset.”
>You tap your fingers on the bench, a million and one questions rushing through your head. But you both sigh. Relax, and look towards the sun.

>For nearly an hour you watch its slow descent behind the mountains. Watch as the brilliant sky turns from orange to red, to purple, and finally to black.
>”That was nice. Wish I saw it with her.”
>Your older self shook his head.
>”She and I were only a short fling. We both knew that. I remembered her fondly, when I could. But we weren't meant for each other. I speak of...”
>The last words seem to die on his lips. He smiles as you turns back to you.
>”That's for you to find out. You'll remember soon enough.”
“Will I?”
>”I will be the first. But not, I think, the last. For your friend's sake, the next one you should seek out is Nergüi. She'll need him to get over her own problems.”
“Next one?”
>”Time has its way with most of us. Strips from us our definitions, our legacies and hopes. But perhaps not for you. You need only remember.”
>His wrinkled hand falls upon your knee.
>”And you will.”
>It stays there for a few moments as his breath grows weaker and weaker. More strained.
>You hold his hand, feel the warmth slowly leave it.
>”This is good.”
>And he lets go.
>A hoof on your chest is the first thing you feel as you return to the land of the living.
>Reaching up towards it and grabbing it weakly, you open your eyes.
>Luna is looking at you, concern and the slightest hint of fear etched on her face.
>”Anon? Are you alright?”
>There's chattering and some kind of argument going on behind her, but for a moment you ignore it, letting go of her hoof and pushing yourself up off the floor.
>You stand shakily on the floor, gripping the edge of the bed for support. Your head is ringing, a low roar in your ears.
>The argument stops as Gleamshine and Mirror Sheen both look to you.
>You close your eyes for a moment, and you feel a warmth, a true warmth, rush through your body.
>When you open your eyes once more you look to Gleamshine, into her milky white eyes. You imagine that she can see you. As you were.
“Gleamshine. I remember you.”

And that's all I wrote today! Hope you are enjoying this!

Finally, an almost unambiguously happy ending.
You goddamned nigger, you need to write faster. I'm loving all the twist and turns that you're spinning for us here. I really like your portrayal of Luna, the balance you have of her still hurting over the past, her trying to acclimate to the world and her "mostly-give-no-fucks" attitude. Keep up the good work.
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This is some of the tightest shit I've read, you're doing god's work
Excellent installment, La-Phantoma. You're smithing together something gripping, mysterious, tragic, but hopeful all at the same time. I'm eagerly awaiting the next part.
Interesting to see a loophole in the memory wipe effect. While public references are edited, it seems like personal ones are not. Or maybe there is something more to it than I'm assuming.
Also nice to see that the memories of those who encountered him can be 'restored' given enough prodding.
I also agree with the sentiment of "write faster".
Well Celestia's diary was edited, so I think pictures and text are all affected
Ah, right. Guess I messed up my phrasing, or I wasn't thinking right.
Written records are edited, and maybe any video crystals that exist, but audio only ones aren't edited since that's something outside its possibility?
>>The mares float stuff around them at a certain range and height and have to retrain themselves so they don't smack you with their stuff as they walk down the street

>You are Anon
>Another mare """"accidentally"""" smacked you in the ass with one of her floating books
>You know that unicorns usually don't have to worry about where their floating items are as long as they stay a few feet above the heads of other ponies, and that you're still within item-bumping height because you're a good deal taller than ponies, but still.
>It's always the ass.
>And you know for a fact that there is tactile feedback on magical grips, or else it unicorns would accidentally crush or rip objects apart because they can't tell how tight they were holding something
>So you KNOW they can feel that ass-bump.
>Fucking horny mares.
And then it becomes a game of who can trick the other mares into drinking more than they are. Everyone comes home ridiculously drunk and they all claim that it's not their fault they're wasted.
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I think I have something in my eye
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I dunno why. but I love the idea of a pony using gloves like that. Shit's funny
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>Celestia is the only one following proper lab safety with her mane
While I get the joke is Chrysalis being a beaker stand, her and Luna should be kicked out until they get that shit tied up.
>Fill glove with magic
>Expand magic gently
>It fills its container, thus inflating the glove
>Manipulate magic to manipulate the fingers
>Now you can return those fun finger gestures Anon has been showing you
>"Hey, Anon?"
>You fold all the glove fingers except for the forefinger and thumb.
>You leave the thumb sticking up, but point the forefinger at him.
Unicorns don't need direct eye contact with the object they're manipulating, meaning they can "see" and "feel" in all directions, even behind them.
Good shit dude.
Do the princess have to deal with some of their over-zealous mare-servants giving them unwanted cunilingus in the bath?
Hell, with how tall they are, I wouldn't be surprised if a particularly shameless mare would try in the middle of the day
>The princesses are bothered that their subjects apparently think they're gay
>"Celesta, update the requirements for any job in the castle: "can't be a dyke"."
This is pretty great, man. No fucking joke. I can't wait to read more.
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>Anon inna primarily pegasus town
>estrus/mating season rolls around
>he drank the kool-aid and expects mares, specifically pegasi, to go around doing weird mating dances with their widdle hoofsies, just begging for a belly rub or something equally silly
>his face when they instead sprout huge fucking tail feathers and strut around town with what amounts to feathery a wall attatched to their asses
holy fucking hell I am loving this. I have a feeling that anon remembering The Beast in the Long Grass is gonna be one hell of a turning point in the story
>remembering when he was essentially the ponies' boogeyman
Can't wait.
>"Huh. Wow, I sure was a psycho. Good thing I have several perspectives and the collective memories of lifetimes where I didn't flip my shit, or else I might just freak out a second time and eat foals or something. So anyway, I'm hungry; who wants lunch?"
>"Fuck. Did I seriously go around doing that shitty Robert Englund impression for decades? Thank god I couldn't find a fedora. Fuck. I might have to kill myself to forget about that shit now."
>"Oh god, did I REALLY have a lifetime where I was a hardcore stallionist? Aww, no wonder Celestia doesn't want me finding out about my past lives. I can't believe I tried to get her put on trial for 'stare rape'. Christ, this gets worse the more and more memories I unlock."
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Did Applejack work until she passed out in the field again?
Everyone else is really concerned, but Spike is looking like 'Bitch are you really gonna do this now?'

Wonder why he's got a face like that?

>tfw you will never suddenly appear in Applejack's body after passing out in a hot summer's day.
>tfw you will never stumble about trying to figure out how to handle working the farm.
>tfw you will never panic as you try to understand what happened to the real Applejack
>tfw you will never become nervous as Twilight keeps coming to visit saying she's detecting some strange magic on the farm.

Rather curious what you all would do in such a situation, though I bet there are ton of shitty prompts like this one.
Well there are no prompts about being in Applejacks body, so your idea is uniquely shitty if its any consolation.
Tell Big Mac to get back in the kitchen to allay suspicion.
Or Anon got drunk and passed out pantless again.
That makes more sense.
In that sort of situation for anyone i'd immediately inform someone knowledgable and trustworthy, in this case Twilight, that I "Applejack" suddenly have a bunch of memories of being some random jackass and cant remember 'my' life at all.
Just try and get a fix for the situation as soon as possible, no one deserves to be in my shitty body/ life.
What if gender roles where reversed but not just in a cute way, but in a "oh god everythings going tits up" kind of way, as equestria hopelessly buckles under socialist policies it cant afford because the active and go getter attitude of assertive females means less children and a shrinking economy.

Would any of the m6 try to change these things, and if so who? which would rather see the world burn before setting things right?
Love it. Thx writefriend.
This is dumb, because if the maretriarchy was so bad it would have collapsed long before the m6 were around.
Its more likely some stallionists trying to change things that fuck everything up.
>Mares in Black think Anon is an extra-terrestrial from and unknown planet, and try to bring him in for questioning.
>"Are you a spy?! When's the invasion?!"
"I don't know what's going on! Please stop pointing the laser gun in my face, tiny cute pony!"
>"Y-you think I'm cute?"
That is all.
>Anon is an extra-terrestrial from and unknown planet
>Not using the horse-pun "extra-equestrial".
Anon, I am disappoint.
>Through various shenanigans, Anon ends up becoming a member of the MiB, which is pretty cool.
>Or, it would be if he wasn't just the secretary that fetches coffee for the boss all day.
"Come on, I want to be an angent, I'd be great at it."
>"Anon, we've already been over this. Even if that were the case, you're too conspicuous."
"What about a disguise?"
>"As what? You're three times taller than a super model and bipedal. Even as a freakishly tall diamond dog or minotaur, you'd stick out in a crowd."
"There has to be something."
>"I'm sorry, Anon, but the answer is no. Now can you deliver these documents to filing? Oh, and grab me a cup of coffee."
"Sigh, yes, ma'am."
>"Thanks, dollface."
>Anon doesn't give up.
>If the boss won't help him make a disguise, then he'll do it himself.
>... Along with some mares from the R&D department that he flirts into helping him.
>Eventually, Anon squeezes himself into the first mechanized pony suit for humans.
>It's the size of Trouble Shoes if he was as built as Bulk Biceps, but that doesn't stand out much, right?
>gets in the suit
>aww yeah, time to show the boss the new disguise
>she'll be so impressed, she'll have to let him do actual field agent work!
>turns out he, and R&D, forgot 1 teeny tiny detail
>human limbs and pony limbs don't bend the same way
>the sounds of numerous bones shattering, flesh tearing, and anguished howling bellow from the suit as it forces Anon's arms and legs to move in ways they were never meant to
>the screams reach the boss's office
>*sigh* "Celestia that colt is lucky he's cute and knows how to make a damn good cup of coffee."
This works surprisingly good here:

>"Did you finish that essay I assigned a week ago, Anon?"
"Yes, ma'am, here it is."
>"Hmph, and a whole twelve minutes late. Pathetic. Well, I guess I can start grading... Really, Anon? You messed up the header?"
"Sorry, Miss Sparkle."
>"You're hopeless."
>*Twenty minutes of scrupulous examining later.*
>"Well, the body was short, but did barely manage to get across your point adequately, and the closing wasn't the strongest, but, in all, it's not a complete lost cause."
"Thank you, Miss Spark-"
>"Did I say you could speak? Don't make me give you a detention, Mister."
>"That's what I thought. Now, as for your final grade... A 'B'... Minus."
"Oh no! Please, Miss Sparkle! Not a B-!"
>"Are you questioning my decision?"
"N-no! It's just, I-I can't get a B-! Surely there's something I can do! Anything!"
"Yes, anything!"
>Twilight smirks cruelly.
>"I suppose something can be arranged," she says as she slowly unbuttons her blouse. "Those hands of yours, I bet they feel nice..."
>"My belly. Rub it, and maybe I'll reconsider your grade."
"... Y-yes, Miss Sparkle."
>*Several minutes of sensual belly-rubs later, throughout which, Twilight insists Anon maintain eye-contact*
"Not bad," she says, fixing her blouse, face impassive despite the blush on her cheeks.
>She tosses Anon's essay at his feet.
>"There, take it, sloot, and get out of here."
>Anon picks up the paper and looks at the final grade up in the corner.
>Anon has to fight to keep the smirk off his lips and stay in character.
>God, his mare had some weird ideas on what constituted role-play and femdom.
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>Previous corruptive influence of the week is defeated
>a sliver of the corruptive influence manages to escape
>it stays just out range so the mane six couldnt detect it
> it justs stays there
>watching, waiting, biding its time and gaining its strength

>anon drops into equestria a few months after the events of the battle
>he gets along quite well with the ponies of ponyville
>the evil influence sees this as a chance to get back at the main six
>not only is this creature magicless but a easily manipulated male to boot!

>the corruptive influence discreetly possesses anon
>then slowly tries to gain control
>but then it realizes
>theres already somepony here
>a voice
>barely a whisper
>the corruptive influence could barely hear it
>whenever anon himself would say or think something
>a voice would always contradicting anon
>it would think obscenities not even the foulest of depraved mares would imagine

>then it sees the corruptive influence
>it shows her from what she can tell is a toothy grin
>...until she saw its face
"hello dearie~"

got an idea of a green where that "voice" in our heads has a sort of physical manifestation and is much MUCH worse corruptive than the influences of equestria due to black and white morality they're locked to, but the "voice" is a part of what makes us human, it's so small because we choose to be good. but imagine if it got a life of its own like nightmare moon...
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>>human limbs and pony limbs don't bend the same way
>Show has existed for 6 bajillons years now
>People still believe horses have inverted knees and shit like that
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People also screech about anthro when a pony has shoulders but that shit's canon.
I believe thats called "Call of the void". A little voice that says "but what if you jumped?" "What if you stabbed them?"

Its very similar to paranoia, but usually involves actions you didn't take. I often get it when holding scissors and seeing electical wires like chargers. "What if you just cut that, itd be so easy..."
Twilight is a Lewd pony with a capital L. If you find yourself dating her, she'll show it after her nervousness and spaghetti dropping passes. She's even got a secret grimoire filled with degenerate spells fueled by her mile long list of fetishes. Beware, if she finds out that human stamina isn't just a meme, she'll be all over you with weird and wacky magic mating.

>An x-ray spell so you can see what's going on inside her like some hentai.
>A size change and stretch spell. She'll either make you huge or herself small enough that your dick would rip her in half without the stretch spell.
>Then she does it again, but so extreme that you can pick her up and use her like a fleshlight.
>Then she makes herself full hoers size so you can fist her.
>A temporary clone spell on you so you can be a one man gangbang and fill EVERY hole.
>Then a clone spell on her so she can do the same to you.
>Then both of you for a private orgy.
>Temporary species swap spell that works on both of you. You get man on mare, stallion on mare, stallion on woman, and man on woman. She can probably figure out others too.
>For the ones who are daring, she even has a temporary gender swap spell hidden away.
>For the ones who are REALLY daring, there is a temporary age change spell.
>Really, transformation spells of all kinds.
>A fluid production spell for cumshots and maresquirts that are somewhere between porn star and actually ridiculous. There's also a footnote on how to change the flavor.
>You name it, it's in the grimoire.
>The book is thick and even has utility spells not related to sex, but rather as aides and compliments to all of the debauched activity.
>An invisibility cloak spell for public fun.
>A passive healing spell made to fix up damage from getting rough.
>A deep clean up spell both for prep work and messes.
>At the very back of the book, for when everything else has been tried at least once, is Twilight's crown jewel.
>A universal fertility spell
I kind of like the idea that she has absolutely no idea about this stuff. Naturally she'd understand it in theory, but has no understanding of it other than penis+vagina=foal. Thus Anon begins the short and easy process of corrupting her.

>"I just don't understand what you're asking for, Anon."
"I want you to suck my dick, Twilight. I don't know how to make it any clearer."
>"But that serves no purpose! I can't get pregnant from that."
"Yeah, it's sex for fun."
>"That's not actually a thing is it?"
"...Get on the bed. I'm going to show you how fun it can be."
i googled that exact phrase just for this idea

it's an insidious thing, it just crosses your mind out of nowhere and you think "wtf me?" and you dont really have an excuse because it's YOU that's thinking it and not anyone else that's making you think these things
The joints come up early, by moving your rear leg you break your femur, tibia, and fibula at the shorter knee and ankle points
yet mum cums up early
>essentially the ponies' boogeyman
>Anon and Twi spice things up and record a porn
>Only it's porn by horse standards
>Twi feels very dirty
>Anon enjoyed the belly rub and wants to do it again off camera
>tfw you embraced this part of you years ago.
I very much recommend not simply cutting off these impulses when they appear, but following the train of thought to a conclusion.
>run the blade of this razor against your tongue bro.
>just do it fag
>no, that will cause pain.
>oh shit really, nevermind.
Spontaneous thoughts like that are really useful in some situations, and you can train it somewhat.
i get that feeling when i drink from a really cheap thin glasses

when i say cheap i mean i could BREATHE on it and it'll probably break, because of that i get the sudden urge to bite down HARD
but half those arent even possible within the show itself
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I don't get these thoughts. There might be a flash of "oh hey this thing might happen if you aren't careful" but it goes away after that.
>Anon doesn’t even notice the extra voice in his head
>he just thinks the stress of being dropped into a strange new world is getting to him
>meanwhile the weaker corruptive influence is terrified because it is now trapped inside the alien’s head.
>it has realized that the other dark presence it found isn’t another specter or something
>it’s a natural part of the alien’s mind
>the idea of an entire race of such beings with pure senseless evil locked away inside their heads is horrifying
>Anon is just wondering why all his dreams involve screaming recently
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We need more lewd posts for Pony Thread Simulator!
I haven't checked up on that guy's youtube lately. Is he even still doing those videos?
yeah, he actually uploaded pts 38 just last week
Oh shit, I'll check that out later.
>>Anon is just wondering why all his dreams involve screaming recently
Thats simple anon, in the pre-industrial revolution society, the majority of ponies where not engaged in work that would take them away from raising children. With smaller communities and a high degree of commercialization, many many more women would find themselves more occupied with work than finding a husband. It's just not sustainable and like many of the disasters of such a tumultuous time period, the ponies will rarely expect it.

You can even see the evidence of this as the local government takes small historic towns like ponyville, and floods them with immigrants and refugees from abroad, destabilizing the community. Ponyville is no longer a place where you can go to make friends. The state is buckling under their vices and now you must learn to make friends in the state sanctioned way, taking lessons at a grand and expensive institution. Mares and stallions need protection from big brother governments that do these kinds of things. I can't imagine who is really responsible for this, Celestia used to be such a hands off ruler.
stallions raise the foals, not the mares
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>I can't imagine who is really responsible for this
despite being 2% of the population...
>Anon wishes his conspiracy theory mare friend would stop ranting at him
"This isn't why I keep taking you out for coffee, you know."
Women are not stallions though, despite the occasional overlap the reasoning for the gender roles is generally different for ponies than humans.
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Anon, horses are not humans. In a herd mares are almost always the ones in the lead making decisions and weighing risks while the stallion runs at the back. The stallion is basically a walking cum pump that also sometimes settles disputes in his herd but that's pretty much it. Translate this to an intelligent pony society and the mares will often be the ones in charge of something while the stallions stay at home. It's not rocket surgery.
What sort of heart-felt gift would a mare appreciate depending on her race? Like, would something that would typically appeal to an earth pony not appeal to a pegasus, and vice versa? Not even necessarily something that follows a created trend (ie a feather means something significant to pegasus culture but nothing at all to earth pony culture), but something that appeals to them instinctively.

>A gift of brightly colored material appeals to pegasi because of their instincts to build nests and attract mates
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Unicorns are just pony shaped cats.
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>Earth ponies like home cooked food
>Pegasi like small hand/hoofmade things they can wear without interfering with their flight, such as a necklace, and often these gifts will include a feather of some sort
>Unicorns like artsy things, things such as poetry and pictures are heavily valued in almost any relationship, such that even a drawing a foal made on their first day of school when they were three can often still be seen on the fridge when they're twenty and graduating college
>And alicorns just like sweets
>Get foalsitting job
>It's either that or work as a secritary in an office and get your ass slapped while you get mares coffee
>Find it surprisingly fulfilling
>Paternal instincts kick in hard when you take care of other ponies' fillies
>Find one filly who is generally not taken care of by her parents
>One is off on business a lot
>The other is borderline abusive and doesn't stick around the house much
>Take care of her
>Be as good a positive influence as you can be
>Show her some genuine (platonic) affection
>One day when you pick her up from horseschool, she excitedly calls you "daddy" before catching herself
>>And alicorns just like sweets

>The amount of energy necessary to fuel a pony's racial traits are not linear, but exponential
>An earth pony's natural strength takes as much energy as a unicorn's magic, which takes as much energy as a pegasi's flight
>If a pony has two of those traits, then the amount of energy necessary to fuel both of those traits is greater than (energy necessary to fuel one trait) + (energy necessary to fuel other trait)
>An alicorn has the traits of all three races of pony
>The amount of energy necessary to fly, cast magic, and kick like a motherfucker is insane
>Alicorns must consume high calorie foods on a daily basis or else they start exhibiting the symptoms of starvation, and generally does not affect their body weight
>Weakness, headache, dizziness, etc
>Celestia's cake fetish is absolutely a necessity
>...mostly, anyway
>She also just really likes cake
>Each princess has a favourite calorie-rich food they must consume to function properly as alicorns
>Celestia has cake
>Twilight has hayburgers
>Cadence has peetzer
>Luna has...
What DOES Luna have?
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I'm not sure how to feel about this
A truckload of donuts
>ywn have a multi-race herd
>ywn work hard to present your mares with things they will appreciate
>ywn make sure Applejack comes home to a delicious meal that's made special because you made it yourself with love
>ywn make sure that Rainbow Dash has baubles of yours that she can show off (and, unknown to you, treasure privately all by herself, because they came from you)
>ywn make sure that Rarity is provided with designs you half-remember from back on Earth that she ends up incorporating into a new line of clothes; she doesn't even care if they don't sell as well as her usual stock, because it was art created by her beloved, and that makes it more valuable to her than her entire stock
>ywn have a herd that loves you because you gave so much of yourself to you, and vise-versa
All she wants is a little bit of love.
Not only to fuel their magic, but also their insane regeneration properties. Alicorns live so long because they essentially create a new body for themselves overnight
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She chugs doughnuts and hot chocolate. Coffee would need tons of sugar to keep up, so she goes straight for the fatty drink instead.
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10/10 would daughteru
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Donuts, moon pies, and cheese
>eventually twilight and company find out it's there.
>twilight convinces anon to let Luna and her enter his mind to confront the evil spirit.
>get there ready for a fight to free anon.
>surprised when it surrenders and begs to be taken out of anon’s mind
>start to hear the void voice and promptly nope the fuck out taking the spirit with them.
>wonder if anon is evil or something worse has happened to him
>twi goes to ask him about in the morning when he’s awake
“Anon we got the spirit out last night while you were sleeping...are you ok?”
>Anon smiles
>”Well the screams and cries for help are gone. Guess my mind was just to awesome for it.”
“Heh ya...awesome.”
>Anon gives you a confused look
>What are you Anon?
Another excellent and moving update. I like how Luna's and Anon's friendship is developing. They're getting closer even if they don't realize it. I look forward to reading the next update.

I'd read the shit out of that.
Guys, I want to trigger a mare. How do?
This is the only possible answer
She also drinks Tang by the gallon
Apparently some white armor clad aliens shared some with her when they planted a flag a while ago.
She misses them dearly.
She also doesn’t know why seeing Anon makes her happy, but she does know he would look dashing in a white suit of armor
>Another excellent and moving update. I like how Luna's and Anon's friendship is developing. They're getting closer even if they don't realize it. I look forward to reading the next update.

Well you're in luck

Wear socks around the house and flick her bean when she gets aroused for stare-raping you
Slip the balls out when only she’s looking
No one would believe her
But her innate breeding urges would make sure she kept watching you.
Do this long enough and always deny it every chance you get, in public
She will eventually think she has gone crazy
Then rape
Moonpies for meme answer.
Donuts for another meme answer.
The fresh semen of dreaming stallions for a third.
>ponies just don’t have random violent impulses like humans do
>or if they do, they’re a lot less brutal
>most of the time when a pony does something bad it’s a conscious choice on their part
>a pony’s mind, good or bad, is usually orderly unless without influence
>a human’s mind is so chaotic to their eyes they wonder how the hell they managed to form their own societies in the first place
Gods damnit Phantoma. That update summoned onion cutting ninjas. That was a good poke in the feels. I love the characterizations your weaving for Luna and Anon. Your story telling is top notch and I eagerly await the next update.
Muh, feels.

I like the selections of this herd.


Yeah, I posted what I had buffered for the last thread before this one got way ahead of me.
>Be a live-in foalsitter for Diamond
>Filthy is away a lot, and Spoiled just can't be bothered; she's usually out doing just whatever anyway
>Deep down she realizes she's doing a shit job as a mother, and she was the one to suggest hiring a nanny to Filthy to help raise their daughter when they're away.
>Diamond is, of course, a determined little shit at first
>She knows what parental figures are like and she doesn't need another awful creature yelling at her or ignoring her while he takes her father's money
>Cue the first half of every movie where an adult has to take care of some little kid ever
>Diamond makes life hard for Anon, but Anon sticks around because (a) the pay is through the roof, and (b) he has an inkling of what's going on, and he doesn't want to quit and let this filly down
"No kid deserves what I think is going on."
>This changes in one night
>Diamond gets sick with the flu and neither of her parents are around to take care of her
>Anon is there, though
>He makes sure she rests
>Has access to plenty of water
>Cleans up after her when she pukes
>Scrubs her clean when she gets all sweaty from the blankets and the fever
>Even makes her (vegetarian) soup using the recipe he got from his grandma
>All the stress and negative emotions combined with the sudden illness is too much for Diamond, and after a day or two of being taken care of, she breaks down crying
>Anon can just barely understand the words "I'm sorry" as she experiences body-shaking sobs
>Anon holds her and rocks the miserable filly back and forth until she falls asleep
>Things are better once Diamond recovers
>Now she trusts Anon
>No more does he have to chase her though the mansion to get her to take a bath, or do her homework, or to eat dinner
>Now she's happy to see him picking her up from school instead of embarrassed
>Anon even manages to curb some of her poor behaviour, and her bullying rapidly decreases
>One night, when Anon carries an exhausted and half-asleep Diamond Tiara to her bed and tucks her in, and bids her goodnight
>Diamond Tiara yawns and, eyes still shut, mumbles a goodnight
>"G-Good night, daddy..."
>Anon is shocked, but quietly leaves the room
>Anon is confused and doesn't know why he's crying
Yeah, that tugs at my heartstrings. I'd daughteru DT 100%.
>back in the days of turbo-yore, before the sisters ruled
>Luna was something like a cross between the tooth fairy and the Grinch to the ponies
>at night, she'd fly around until she found a stallion having a wet dream, and steal his semen to put inside a magical Klein bottle where it would swirl endlessly in her collection
>they wonder how the hell they managed to form their own societies in the first place
strength of will to drag the rest of humanity kicking and screaming into technological/societal progress while at the same time fighthing the same kicking and screaming from taking it too far when they finally do progress
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>what she fails to mention is her immense pleasure/satisfaction in blueballing anon in his dreams
now that I think of it it's been a while since one of those greens happened
Silly Idea

>part of the reason Starlight Glimmer is so fucked up in the head is that her mother left at an early age
>it’s such a rare phenomenon in Equestria that most pony psychologists don’t know how to help a foal with behavioral problems stemming from abandonment issues
>usually such cases end up in prison due to the remaining parent’s inability to help them work through those emotions, leading to escalating criminal behavior
>Starlight has realized that her behavior is wrong in canon but she doesn’t fully understand why she is the way that she is
>in actuality Sunburst leaving was just the straw that broke the camel’s back
>Starlight’s mother leaving half a year before was the real childhood trauma that brought her close to the edge, Sunburst leaving pushed her over
>Psychiatrist Anon in RGRE sees the signs, realizes the true issue, and suggests to Twilight that Starlight see him as part of her reformation
>Starlight’s father loves her dearly and he did the best he could, but he was fumbling around in the dark
>he thought it was best for Starlight not to mention her mother at all and just let her work out those feelings on her own, which initially led to her edgy goth phase as a teenager, then her criminal activities by starting Our Town
>Anon helps her express those feelings in a productive way and once he deems she’s stable enough, suggests talking to her mother again after all these years
>Starlight just has to find her
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You dont remember those greens very well, assuming you're reffering to the ones where mares(Luna) show him how easily a they can wrap him around her hoof.
He is very much not being blueballed.
>Anon had to deal with a lot of things when he first started dating his bird horse girlfriend (the proper term is hippogryph, Anon) but he thought he was used to it.
>Her odd dances when she had first asked him out.
>Her building a nest out of his clothes when she had first become pregnant.
>The fact that she did indeed lay two eggs that needed to be sat on and kept warm by both of them until they hatched.
>Anon met these oddities and overcame them with ease, and yet, he's still finds himself being surprised while raising a pair of bird horse foals.
>Especially when his wife is out of of town and he has to take care of the twins solo.
>"Yeah?" Anon says, turning his face from the pillow to look at his daughter silhouetted in the doorway.
>"Marty is sleep flying again."
>Anon sighs.
"He'll settle down eventually."
>"Yeah, but, um, the window was left open."
"... I'll get the lasso."
Incorrect. The correct terminology is horsebird.
When they transform into seaponies they're called fishhorses. Pegasi are birdhorses
You’re slightly off. Fishhorses are sirens. Horsefishes are Seaponies.
Dwemeranon & story: ded
Tentacleanon & story: ded

All hope rides on Combatcomma and La-Phantoma to give us a reason to continue.
What silly fish
>ponies' boogeyman
That sounds more like a Zebra name, like a monster in the savanna.
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>Purple knows well that you are intelligent, but due to the unbreachable language barrier, she has to make it apparent in other ways that she wants your attention
>More instinct-driven, emotive ways. It's kinda funny for a little pony who you know is smarter than you, but Purple has been your rock and steadfast friend since you came here, so you gladly play along.
>You've learned that this one (obviously) means she's hungry and wants you to make her something, so you turn and walk toward the kitchen, leaving a hand at your side open as you do.
>Purple quickly takes her place at your side and nuzzles the offered hand, occasionally licking or kissing it. The plate in her mouth now floating at her side.
>Lately she's been acting even more cuddly than usual, and the hand kissing is new.
>And earlier in the week, some little equines bright a bed entirely too large for Purple in and swapped it out with her small one.
>You gulp and blush a little when Purple glances up at you with soulful violet eyes, flicking her tail.
>If you didn't know better, you'd say she was grooming you to be a mate.
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Silly indeed
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>That's not speak of that white one that just sits there and... just STARES at you with this look on her face whenever you pass by.
>You know the one.
>You think Purple has been keeping her away because she's almost never present when she's with you.
>One of these days you seriously think you're going to get jumped out of nowhere.
>It's a very unsettling feeling.
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I fucking love this. Also, pic related: the natural progression of this idea.
anyone got the link to the abomination anon green?
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There's this other horse that comes around and hangs out with Purple sometimes. You've dubbed her Wildberry Poptart due to the color in her mane.
She SEEMS nice, but you get a bad feeling about her, like there's something just below the surface you don't want to see. Sometimes she'll press her head into your hand and move it around with her weird horse telekinesis. Purple would look at her disapprovingly, or what you supposed was disapproval, and she would immediately stop. Her hair feels really silky. She must use some high quality shampoo.
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>something something pegsus wing preening
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>Unbreachable language barrier
Honestly, I think I'd snap and go mad from it way before anything else happened.
Imagine being surrounded by nothing but clearly sentient and intelligent life that you simply can't converse with because, simply put, being super smart doesn't make them be able to speak any form of human language.
It's like if a dog was smart enough to use the bathroom, bathe, cook, wear clothes, watch Dog TV, write and read in their doggo speech and do everything a human can and more but he still talks in barks and borks only other dogs can understand and you can't hope to replicate. You have so many questions and want to hold conversations and learn about life through their point of view but all you can do is hold a very basic game of charades every time.
What Monkey Paw shenanigan is this!?
That makes me think of Discording fucking with everyone by making them hear only gibberish.
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You met a new unicorn today, she seems to be the demanding of attention out of the whole bunch. You've named her.... Waif for it, this will bring you right to the edge of your seat. You've decided to name her "Tricksy", because she does magic tricks, you see? Hahahaha... Hey why aren't you laughing?
Anyway, "Tricksy" openly rubbed up against you without any sign of decorum or respect for personal space. In fact she seemed to (metaphorically) thumb her nose at any kind of authority, especially if that authority was purple with wings and straight cut bangs.
Honestly, you didn't think she was so bad. You've dealt with animals being forward with their desire to cuddle before. You just wished she would stop butting her head into your groin.
i'd take it as an excuse to pet them without repercussions

especially doggos
I'd be upset, but I'd be comforted by the knowledge that the doggos surrounding me are as intelligent as I am and that it's comparable to being stuck in a foreign country and they're all speaking a language I don't speak. Other methods of communication are possible, and even though they won't be as thorough or as innately understandable as speech is, we'd still be able to convey ideas with each other. I wouldn't like it very much because of how much effort has to go into communicating, but I wouldn't go mad.
Drawing pictures is apparently impossible here i guess.
It doesn't take much practice to get recognisable objects, and keeping a set of flash cards / a notebook of the most common ones should be your first task.
Your second task is to git gud at discerning variance in their horsey sounds.
It'd be a hell of an effort to understand them, but you'd get very basic communication down in relatively good time.
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>You just wished she would stop butting her head into your groin.
"Stop that, miss Tricksy."
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>Purple can't directly overcome the language barrier, but with her magic, she worked her genius and found a work around.
>She gifts you an amulet glowing with power and urges you to pet her.
>Then you feel it.
>Not her soft fur, but a thin, unsure tendril of SOMETHING in your mind.
>Purple smiles
>And suddenly you could feel IT
>You could feel all the love and happiness you brought her, along with the vague feeling of an inquiry about yourself.
>The first real communication you've had in months...
>Purple's surprise is plain to you when you hug her close, but then it settles, the love returning along with a feeling coaxing you to calm and be comforted. She wraps her wings around you and purrs softly in her chest
>You chuckle and dry the few tears you shed. If Purple was trying to groom you into a mate, she succeeded
>A flash of embarrassment with a undertone of excitement comes from her. Her faced lights up red as she does a little embarrassed dance on her hooves
>You let her go, noting that the connection between you and her remains. Slowly, you sense other ponies around vaguely on a 6th sense you cant describe well.
>Looking down at the slowly recovering Purple, she clears her throat and turns, tugging at your mind gently to follow.
>Before you rise, you grin and concentrate on her rump. 'Nice.'
>She "eep"s and stumbles, her face flaring red.
>Life just got even better.
>They unintentionally bring Anons dark thoughts out with the spirit
>The thing forms into a living black liquid that's constantly whispering incomprehensible nonsense
>This sent the spirit into a panic attack
>"It followed me out!! By Discords beard IT FOLLOWED ME OUT!"
>It's bottled up in a magical flask and kept away from public eye
>If you focus enough you can make out sentences
>Coincidencentally Anon has had absolutely no violent invasive thoughts since the incident
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>>Before you rise, you grin and concentrate on her rump. 'Nice.'
>>She "eep"s and stumbles, her face flaring red.
>>Life just got even better.
You're good at writing adorable Twilight.
>And that's how the Dwarf in the Flask was made.
>taking away my dark and intrusive thoughts
But I enjoy those.
>The horsmunculi call Anon Grandfather
I'm afraid you have the homo aids, anon. Best of luck, but don't come back.
>is Twilight's crown jewel.
>>A universal fertility spell
Immersion broken.
Mares in RGRE would look at having to bear a child like a black man looks at a pregnant one-night-stand claiming it's his.
There's a reason it's at the back of the book. Twilight ain't settling until she's had it all.
>Mare looks at her own belly
>"That ain't mine."
>Herp derp
While I am enjoying our little larp, if you actually think this is how horses work you don't know a whole lot about them. Stallions are in charge of the herd and they indeed are at the back, pushing and controlling the direction of every horse in front of them. If you want to know how horses think you can't anthropomorphize them. They aren't too concerned about who is in front. What they care about is controlling movement. Moving someone or keeping someone from being moved. This is the way you train a horse for a reason. Thinking you have a horse's respect because its following you is about as foolish as a rabbit thinking a wolf respects it because it's being followed by the wolf.

But it's true, why don't you stallions understand!?
more like
>mare looks at her belly
>"I ain't keepin' this."

Additionally, birth control spells would simply need to invalidate the egg cells, so they'd be fast, easy, guaranteed 100% effective every time, and wouldn't alter the feeling of sex at all.
Even during estrus, a simple targeted teleportation spell that locks on to the egg cell(s) within the utereus/fallopian tubes would simply remove the egg cell altogether.

Effectively being an on/off switch for infertility.
Which would be every horny mare's wet dream.
Being able to have as much sex as they can get without risking nearly a year of slow, weak, beer-belly'd, constantly needing to pee, turbo-sexlessness. (You can't pick up hot stallions in a bar with a pregnancy bulge, except for the occasional psycho-prego-fetishists with mommy issues.)
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"Scientific studies of wild horses have found that stallions aren't the 'ruler' of a 'harem' of mares. Instead, the actual leader an older mare. The herd moves when and where she does. She drinks first from watering holes and stakes out the best grazing spots. The herd stallion brings up the rear when the herd travels. His job is to fight off predators and other males who try to join the herd. He also nips at stragglers to make sure they keep up with the herd."

"The second thing we want to understand is that the vast majority of the members of any feral band, including the stallion, are followers, and they generally have only one leader. That leader is always an older, established mare. You see, when a mare is born into a herd they will usually stay with that herd for life, while the males within the herd will generally come and go. So not only are the mares the ones that establish the herd’s stability (and therefore it’s general hierarchy) but it is also the lead mare that establishes where the herd goes, when it goes, and why it goes."
“It seems to come down to the close relationships that the leading horse has with other horses,” Petit said. “When horses see their ‘friends’ start to move, they’ll often join in and start moving as well.” The horses typically begin to move in small groups until the entire herd is moving.

Petit’s research team studied several herds of about 15 to 20 horses in seminatural settings in very large pastures. They videoed the herds’ movements, starting from well before the movement until after the movement was completed. They found that leaders often gave subtle physical cues—such as specific postures—prior to movement, and these were sufficient to get the horses all moving at approximately the same time. They also noted that nearly every horse in the herd was the leader for at least one movement over the course of a week. However, not all leading horses were followed, in which cases the leader abandoned the movement.

Petit said the team also found, somewhat surprisingly, that a stallion in a group of mares actually appears to disrupt the harmony of the movements. “When we took the stallion out, the mares seemed much more in phase without him,” she said. “And when he was there, he was out of phase with them. If he tried to initiate movements, he usually wasn’t followed.”

Horse herds’ highly complex social structures allow the members to have very efficient and organized group movements, said Petit. “This is vital for a prey group,” she said. “The group has to be able to move from a food point to a water point, for example, without its members getting widely dispersed.”

TL'DR You're full of shit
>hurf durf ackshually if we look at things with how a human would see it, mares are totally in charge silly boyz
lol kay dumbass.
Lead mares do not exist. All horses initiate movement, only denial of movement and forced movement counts as dominating herding behavior. This is what we bread dogs to do. You would have to be an absolute moron to confuse passive behavior of "I'm seeing a thing I want and moving towards it" first as the same as "I want to move here but I can't because I am not being allowed to move here"
no, you are. This is what herding looks like.
The mares don't follow the stallion though. Even if there isn't a lead mare, the stallion is not going to lead the group in any circumstance. That's my point, and you seem to have missed the last post I made saying the exact same thing you did.
>That's my point, and you seem to have missed the last post I made saying the exact same thing you did.
You're expecting a lot Anon
>RGREquestria is not a perfect mirror of our own but with reversed gender roles
>Anon expected his stallion neighbors who were members of herds to be sassy and in charge, making decisions about finances and who sleeps on which couch for when his mares behave like a bumbling sitcom dad
>Turns out that whenever a stallion in a herd tries to make a decision, he's generally ignored by the mares
>The other mares can make decisions and are generally followed by the other ponies in the herd (including the stallion), but it just doesn't seem to work when the stallion tries it
>"C'mon, mares! Let's go to Wendles for lunch! They have a sale on hayburgers today!"
>>"Nah, colt, I don't really feel like it. How about that one Neightalian place down on Mane Street?"
>>>"Oh, good idea, sister! Yeah, let's go there."
>Turns out stallions are given very little power in the decision-making process
>Sure, he'll cook and clean and do a big chunk of the foal-rearing, but nopony seriously trusts a stallion to make sound financial decisions or generally have a good coconut on his shoulders
>After a few months of listening to all the stallions he's encountered behave like a sassy gay friend from every sitcom ever, Anon is inclined to believe it too
>Twilight has very little idea about how sex works
>Celestia never taught her because she doesn't need ANOTHER rumour being spread around that she's a filly-fiddler, and Velvet assumed that Night Light would take care of "The Talk"
>Likewise, Night Light was under the impression that Celestia would teach Twilight about the Pegasi and the Parasprites, but that never happened
>Now all Twilight has to go on is hearsay and those horse-Japanese comics she totally doesn't have hidden under her mattress
>It was a surprise to everypony when it was discovered the Anon had been dating Chrysalis, but he swore she was good now.
>And for a time, she was, until an opportunity to seize power arouse, and she took it, leaving Anon heart broken.
>When she was inevitably thwarted and went into hiding for time, she eventually came crawling back to Anon, apologizing and admitting how foolish she'd been.
>Anon, being the big hearted guy that he was, took her back and protected her from the ponies when they came.
"I swear, Twilight, she's changed. She won't cause trouble."
>But she did, and she ran, and then she came back with the same sub story.
>Her life had been rough growing up.
>It had been cruel, and sometimes, she just does these things.
>She swears she'll do better, though, and Anon takes her back.
>Twilight and company don't know what to do.
>Why does Anon keep taking her back?
>mares don't follow the stallion though
Mares obey stallions when they are moved. No one follows a horse unless they want to, rather, Stallions _force_ a mare to move by exerting pressure and moving into their personal space.
Mares can do this too, but mostly Stallions control herds.
>be an unborn foal
>"Hmm... I think I'll be a boy."
>Floating in the aether, pondering reality
>Magic spell comes out of nowhere
>tfw spawnkilled
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Once is potentially understandable.
Twice is horseshit.
Three times is when you seriously contemplate murder-suicide. (because you're obviously at least as fucked in the head as she is to have ended up with this happening three fucking times.)

If she wants to take over the town/country/world or whatever, she needs to just take you along as her partner in crime.
Abandoning you every time her lust for power gets the better of her is unforgivable.
Um, Anon, I'm preeety sure that's not how teleportation works.
>I'm gonna murder my foal today
>*teleports half her organs out with the fetus*
And nothing of value was lost.
>Anon drinks the flask
>"Is the blindfold really necessary, Anon?"
"Be patient, Chryssi, we're almost there."
>"Fine, but this better be good. I was in the middle of Sun Tzu's The Art of War."
"Still don't know you should be reading that."
>"I'm expanding my horizons! You said I should get a hobby, and if that blasted Sparkle is to be believed, there is no better one than reading."
"Yes, but I have a lot of other books you could be reading. Why not try Harry Potter?"
>"I highly doubt the story of a ungroomed beast practicing pottery would be nearly as worthwhile as learning how to crush my enemies."
"Sigh, whatever, we're here."
>The deposed monarch pulls off her blindfold and blinks against the light to see her grinning lover in front of a run-down building, arms held out wide.
>"... You got me a dump?"
"No! It's a bakery!"
>"Ah... And yet I'm still confused."
"Well, you know how that money I brought-"
>"The small fortune of nickle and copper, yes."
"Well, it's not gonna last forever, so I figured we'd have to do something about that eventually."
"What? You thought I'd support you forever?"
>"Um, kind of?"
"Yeah, no dice, and that's why I've decided we're going into business together."
>"... As bakers."
>Chrysalis rubs the space between her eyes and sighs.
>"Anon, this is ridiculous. I'm a Dark Queen, not a pastry chef. Your place might be in the kitchen, but mine is on a throne."
"Huh, you know, Twilight and her friends said the same."
>"They acknowledge that Equestria should surrender to me and submit to my rule?"
"No, that you wouldn't be able to cut it as a baker. Heck, they were even saying you'd run a business into the ground faster than you did your hive."
>Chrysalis stills to a creepy extent.
>Anon isn't even sure she's breathing.
>"... They said that?"
"They did."
>"Those bitches! I'll show them! I will dominate the pastry market of Ponyville! Run that Pink one out of business! Then expand to the furthest reaches of Equestria!"
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>>"... You got me a dump?"
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Fufufu its the perfect revenge!
Ahhh, love that ol bait an switch.
>"why haven't I fell into anon crotch yet?"
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>Anon's face when Chrysalis actually ends up running the Cakes out of business
>Anon's face when the girls blame him
Is this why pudgelight stopped being a thing?
They were spot on, though. God, I wish Luna was my wife.
>"You really should let me do that."
"I can handle a hammer, Chryssi."
>"But you're a colt, and your body is soft and squishy."
"Gee, thanks for the compliment."
>"Not that you're fat! I just mean you chitin, and your wriggles-"
>"Fimbers are delicate and I don't want you to damage them."
"Well, thanks or the concern-"
>"They feel to good in my queenhood to risk their loss."
"-But I've got this. Just stick to painting the walls. your magic is better for getting all the way to the ceiling without a ladder."
>Chrysalis huffs, but returns her attention to the roller in her magic and the application of lime-green paint to the walls.
>Even so, she continues to flit glances towards Anon as he fixes the door frame, and he can feel it on his back.
>Smirking, he decides to pull a prank, taking an exaggerated swing towards his hand and screaming in pain just as the loud thwack echoes through the room.
>"Oh goodness no!"
"Hah! Got-!"
>The changeling queen reaches him in an instant, grabbing his supposedly injured hand and bringing it to her mouth.
>Then she vomits a viscous, green, slightly glowing slime over his hand that covers it all the way to his wrist.
"What the fuck, Chryssi?!"
>"Shh, it's okay, love, let the healing gel sooth your pain. Shh, you're being such a strong colt right now."
>Anon feels the slime harden into a cocoon around his hand, the glow leaving a dark green shell and pleasant warmth behind.
>"There," Chrysalis says cheerily, letting go of his hand. "You'll be fully recovered in no time, Anon. See, though, this is why you should let me handle the dangerous jobs. Hopefully you learned a lesson."
>"Yes, love?"
"I was messing with you. My hand was fine."
>"Oh... Well, no harm done."
"How do I get this off?"
>"It'll break off on it's own... in a day or two."
>Chrysalis watches as Anon pounds his cocooned hand on the ground fruitlessly, and smiles.
>"I suppose this means I'll be doing the hammering for today, though."
I would very much like an easily flustered rainbow dash to love and to hold and screw each other silly.
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>"Not that you're fat! I just mean you chitin, and your wriggles-"
*I just mean that you lack chitin
Stupid mistakes. I was trying to cut a couple characters, and forgot to add back in the words.
The SlutAnon/Rainbow Dash story was fun.
Do you guys think some unicorn mares are into small horn humiliation?
Yeah, Fizzlepop
Shit, man. You cant say that sort of thing. She had a horrible accident, it was tragic.
Besides, it's obvious that the ones with the fetish are Lyra, Rarity, Luna, Vinyl, and Moondancer. Lyra for the meme value. Rarity because it fits with her being colty. Luna because her sister's horn is way bigger. Vinyl because she's a marely mare with a secret maledom fetish. And finally, Moondancer because she was a NEET for years and got into some kinky shit via doujins and/or the ponynet.
I want to tell them all how cute their little hornsies are.
I bet Fizzlepop would have some insecurities about her horn and believe that, while she might be able to make friends, she'll never have a stallion, because why would one ever choose her over a complete mare?
As tall as she is, I think she's more mare than most mares.
Yeah Discord would make the Unbreachable Language Barrier, inconsequential. He's a natural shapeshifter so if the excuse is their bodies are not formed in a way to replicate human speech, he would be capable of circumventing that.

His weird knowledge about things would make it trivial for him to learn human languages and it would be incredibly likely that he could just snap his fingers to make Anon speak equestrian.

Additionally that short from Hasbro last week about Twilight being sick, Pinkie Pie speaks sound effect, so for pure comedic purposes she would be the only one who could understand Anon and she would solely react to him, but not translate.
No. She doesn’t have a small horn. It’s broken
>tfw you suffer a disfiguring tragedy
>tfw the disfigurement is your fetish
>Anon is a leg amputee
>loves when mares horn-fuck his dried up pus encrusted dirty blood knee hole.

>It was strange. To remember all of a sudden the life you had lived.
>Before you remembered, you feared it would be like another part of your mind, separate from the you-you were before you awoke again.
>Or perhaps you feared, quietly, that the you-you were would be consumed by that man who died on that dusky balcony not a few weeks ago.
>But he was you. You were he.
>And fifty-seven years of memories, at least those he could hold onto in those last few years, returned as your own. For they were your own.
>You remembered Manehatten. Las Pegasus. Applewood and a few other cities. You remembered your years of service under Celestia. Starfall, Silvertouch, Gleamshine, Sunspot and a dozen or more names. You remembered...
>Letting go of all of it. The quiet contentment of being free. All the times you remembered death, you remembered the fear. You remembered the cold. The shivering. The Abyss. And yet here you were, remembering trying to smile one last time.
>You spent about an hour gushing with Gleamshine about old times, holding her weak hoof as the two of you reminisced about the card games, the fast... Carriages. The drinking and debauchery. But also the quiet nights in. Watching the stars from the roof of that shitty dockside apartment.
>You kept out the sex, mainly because her daughter and a princess were right there in the room.
>But she was growing tired. Her eyelids falling over those milk-white eyes. You told her and her daughter that you had indeed left some money for them in your will, that it should be sorted out by the executor of Brightsmile's estate soon enough.
>And as Gleamshine fell asleep with a soft smile on her lips, playing that recording of the two of you one more time to lull her into the dark, you and Luna made to leave.
>When that Red door closes behind you, you turn to her for a moment, a smile on your face.
>She opens her mouth to speak, but you stop her.
>You embrace her, wrapping your arms around her neck as she gasps.
“Thank you. Thank you.”
“Without you I'd... I don't know.”
>She gingerly pats your back with her hoof, looking away from you, before sighing and placing her head on your shoulder.
>”We simply teleported you here...”
“How great or small you think your role was, I remember. That's enough.”
>”What is it like?”
>An interesting question.
“It's just like remembering anything else. I feel like it's me in those memories, if that's the question. It's undoubtedly me. I don't always get that with my dreams.”
>Luna simply nods, and you finally break off the hug, patting her on the head to her annoyance. In return she whips your face with her tail, deliberately aiming perfectly for the scar already there.
“Son of a!”
>”Can't have the peasants getting too familiar with royalty.”
>You're about to argue, but you can see the smug grin on her face. So you simply laugh and rub the scar.
“You know, we're basically done here in Fillydelphia. If I am right about what I need to do to remember these past lives, we may need to swing by Canterlot again. So... Shall we just grab our bags from the hotel and see Celestia again?”
>You can't keep the hope and joy out of your voice, the want to see your old boss and tell her you remember working beneath her for fifty years.
>Luna glances towards the afternoon sun for a moment before nodding.
>”Why not? It shall be a more pleasant place to sleep than here.”
>The two of you begin the long trek back to the hotel. Sparing one last glance towards Gleamshine's house, and the daughter in the doorway you never really could have had. The moment passes, and you leave this place.

>You look out of the window of your hotel room towards the setting sun.
“Goddammit do I hate teleporting.” You grumble as you grab your bag and throw it over your shoulders.
>”If you can think of a more convenient way to travel we would love to hear it.”
>Being shot out of a cannon? Killing yourself and hoping you reincarnate somewhere near where you want to go? Walking?
>But instead of threatening to do any of those tedious things you simply sigh and prepare yourself.
“Let's get this over with.”
>But Luna is no longer listening to you, instead once again furiously focusing on her glowing and sparking horn.
>Just in case, you take a step closer to her. Being shocked by a bolt of magic was less terrifying than only half of you teleporting with her, or any number of things you feared that came with bending time and space to your apparent whims.
>The light of her horn intensifies to a blinding light, and you hold up your hand to shield your eyes...
>Until that same light fades.
>You check your surroundings. Yep. Definitely the same crappy hotel room.
“You know, I knew stallions that had similar problems as they got older. There are pills that can...”
>”Cease your attempts at humour. We have this.”
>Luna tries again, focusing no doubt on where she wanted the two of you to be. Sparks and lights flying across the room. Once again the light grows more and more intense, and you shield your eyes again. And then you feel it. The drop of your stomach.

>The void is a familiar yet unwelcome feeling now. You don't bother to move or comprehend its impossible angles and dimensions, instead just keeping your eyes shut. Oh sure, you're pretty sure you can hear time and space rushing past you, but you get used to it.
>Okay, sure. You didn't like the way that you felt your central nervous system had been removed from your body and temporarily stretched across several thousand miles, but that was a small complaint.
>The first clue you had noticed that you had left the void was the cool air against your face. At first, it was a pleasant feeling. But as you opened your eyes you couldn't help but notice that the air was getting faster, smacking against you.
>It was rather evident as well that you were high in the air. Like, stupidly high. You were rushing towards a cloud.
“Well that sucks,” you grumble while you had the chance to
>Both in the sense that as you accelerated you wouldn't be able to hear yourself, but also that you would probably die in a minute or two.
>Well, the more things change you suppose.
>First things first, you moved to throw your bag off your shoulder, hopefully lowering your terminal velocity. Next, look for Luna.
>That's less successful. Wherever she is, it isn't here.
>As you prepare to fall through the cloud rushing towards you, you hold out your arms and legs, anything to slow your descent.
>Water vapour smashes into you as you break through the top layer of the cloud. You can feel small droplets of the stuff, and tiny shards of ice impact against your body. If you weren't falling to your death you'd compare it to a nice cold shower, but it was rather hard to keep that fact from your mind.
>You scream, partly in raw adrenaline-fuelled excitement and partly in raw adrenaline-fuelled terror as you break through the cloud and look below.
>It was a beautiful sight. The fields of Equestria. The mountain that Canterlot perched upon, all lit in that same familiar amber hue that you once died lit by.
>You look towards Celestia's sun. Against the dark cloud above you and the mountains ahead, you had never seen anything so terrible yet so beautiful.
>There were worst ways to go you supposed.
>Your vision was drawn back towards the castle atop the mountain as you saw a white shape rushing out of it.
>You watch in quiet joy as you notice exactly what this shape was. You scream against the wind.
“Celestia! Good to see you!”
>”Anonymous! What are you doing!”
>She furiously flaps her wings, flying above you and gripping you in her hooves. She doesn't outright break your fall, because as whack as physics were, that should still kill you, instead slowing you down like a lovely fluffy sapient parachute.
“I'm guessing Luna fucked up the teleport somehow.”
>Celestia grunts as she pulls up slowly, and you feel yourself slowing down. Still rushing towards the castle, however.
“Told you we'd...”
>”Now is not the time for...”
>Castle getting dangerously close now. Alright. Remember, don't tense your body. Land on the balls of your feet if you can. Try and lean forward taking as much weight off your...
>Oh wait you're already here.
>You and Celestia crash into one of the many balconies of the Castle. The two of you roll, trying to dissipate as much energy away from your bones and muscles.
>For a moment the two of you lie there, catching your breaths.
>The two of you are nearly entwined, Celestia still having her hooves around your body.
>You rub one of her hooves around your chest before saying.
“As I was saying. Told you we'd meet again.”
>Celestia takes a deep breath to collect herself, then giggles.
>”I suppose you did.”
>The two of you stay like that for a minute, content merely to breathe and glad to be alive, before the door to the balcony opens.
>Both you and Celestia look towards it to see the smaller shape of Luna barges the door open.
>”Sister! We cannot find Anon... Oh.”
>You smile as Celestia blushes.
“Hey. Nice teleporting there.”

>Once you and Celestia untangled yourselves from one another, decorum took over as the Princess of the Sun rushed back to court so that she could apparently greet you properly. You weren't quite sure why, she hated the pomp and circumstance of rule. But maybe it was to do with trying not to look so flushed.
>The guards simply stepped aside this time, not bothering to argue with you yet again.
>Celestia tries to look dignified and stoic, but you notice the same infectious smile that plays upon your face grow on hers as well, as her violet eyes fill with joy.
>Still, you'll play it her way. You had fifty years of experience of at least giving lip service to decorum.
“Your majesty.” You say as you bow.
>Low, with your right arm against the small of your back and your left across your stomach, just as you had learnt all those years ago.
>As you glance up with a wry grin from your low bow, you notice her quivering lip as she seems to recognise that bow. Of course, when you didn't remember yourself you weren't one for bowing at all. You now knew better.
>How long should you wait to tell her?
>No fuck it, you wanted your friend back.
>You move to stand, placing both hands behind your back as you have always done in her divine service.
“I remember.”
>The words cause a strange set of reactions in her. First, a moment of confusion. Then her brilliant violet eyes widen in recognition of what exactly what you mean. Then no doubt a demure nod or...
>She flies towards you and embraces you.
>Well... You didn't expect that again.
>You run a hand through her mane as she looks up into your eyes, careful to keep her horn well away from your face.
>And in a quiet voice she asks
>You smile.
“Fifty years ago I became the head of your royal household. Your favourite cake is either a Celestial sponge cake. I used to smuggle Ambrosia's doughnuts in for you during long days at court. We once spent 32 hours trapped in the Griffonstone embassy because you had a cold and couldn't use your magic and one of them lost the key to your room. Officially your favourite flowers are Sunflowers but really you prefer Bluebells. When I was younger I used to give you massages.”
>Tears begin to form at the edges of her eyes. Even your vision is getting a little blurry.
>”It is you... You are him.”
“And he is I.”
>Celestia nuzzles your chest for a bit, and for a while, the two of you are content to simply be in each others company again. You sit down on the marble floor and Celestia follows with you as you scratch behind her ears.
>But finally something other than both of you breathing breaks the silence.
>A simple question, but you are not quite sure you can answer it. But you owe it to her to try.
“An old friend of mine remembered me. The first Pony I ever remember meeting, at least in that life. She had an audio recording of a conversation with both of us on it, and unlike every picture, painting, written word or memory of me... She used my name. My real name.”
>Celestia's eyes widen.
>”So she remembered you??”
“Not at first. But with me there to remind her that it was weird Brightsmile was called Anon in this one recording it all seemed to click for her. And when she remembered... So did I.”
>Celestia breaks the embrace slowly, one last nuzzle into your chest before she stands as tall as ever. But the regal mask she usually wears is gone. Tears of joy streaming down her soft white face, a trembling smile on her lips.
“I meet with... Well, me. I don't remember the conversation from his side, but when I awoke I remembered everything he did at the end. A life entire. A life working for... Well, you know.”
>You stand up, looking her right in the eyes.
>”And... If you die... Will you still remember?”
>Your smile grows strained ever so slightly, and you weakly shrug.
“I don't know. Maybe? There'll be only one way to find out.”
>Celestia winces. You place your hand against her neck and rub it to console her.
“But I'm in no rush yet. I've got too much to live for now.”
>Celestia's smile, as small as it is, looks radiant. The brightest thing in the room by far
>”Good. I would not want to lose you again.”
>Her words are honest. Enough so that they seem to surprise her as well. Not you, however.
“Celestia... At the end of my last life... Did you know I was going to that balcony to die?”
>She looks away for a moment, then back into your eyes before nodding ever so slightly.
“Okay. And at the end... There was something we both thought it was too late to say to one another. We've got more time now, even if I will eventually forget. What was it?”
>Her cheeks glow red for a moment, and she shakes as if trying to steel herself. Her gaze turns fierce and resolute for a moment, and her gaze bores into your own.
>You wait.
>And wait.
>And she breaks. The tears appear again.
>Say it. You think you can guess. But she has to say it. Admit it to herself as much as to you.
>But she can't. Clenching her eyes shut, she wipes them with a hoof.
>”Will you keep going? To find out yourself?”
>You sigh, patting her once more on her neck before removing your hand.
“Yes. I suggested to myself to try and find Nergüi. For Luna's sake apparently.”
>”Luna... She's still...”
“Still her.”
>Celestia sighs again.
>”How might you hope to do that? It sounds like, if I were to guess, that you need to remind the first person you meet of yourself in order to remember. But everyone but I and Luna that knew you as him are long dead.”
>You smile, to assuage her fears and doubts.
“That was part of the reason I came back here. Mostly to see you again. To remind myself why I am doing this. But also...”
>You wince as you ask this.
>”There's a magical means to time travel? Isn't there?”


>For a moment you watch the embers float into the night's sky. Joining with the stars and the scarred moon above.
>Well, obviously not really, obviously it's just the heat leaving the specks of ash and becoming hard to see. But it was a nice bit of poetic licence.
>You feel a hoof against your leg, and you look down towards Zaerara.
>The small Zebra smiles at you. Trying to assuage your fears of what you are about to go through. You smile at her in return, running your hand through her thick mane.
>The Shaman stands up to speak.
>”A vision quest is not to be taken lightly. Those who partake can find their place in the universe change suddenly.”
>He turns to you, the Zebra's green eyes staring into your own.
>”Anonymous of no clan, no name, no past. Are you ready to take the quest, at long last?”
>You nod, smiling smugly.
“Free hallucinogenics? What's not to love?”
>Zaerara giggles as the Shaman simply glowers at you. You wave a hand, hoping to he took it as a joke.
>The Shaman sighs, and reaches for a small ceramic cup, and the strange swirling green liquid within. He holds it with both hooves.
>”Drink it all, and drink it well. And you shall be under its spell.”
>You gently take the cup with your left hand.
“Bottoms up.”
>You start to swig. It tastes of ash. Fire. Then Ice. A thousand tastes and textures run across your tongue. And the more you drink, the stranger they become. You taste your first kiss, and the time you broke your arm. You taste your fear of death and that song you can only half remember.
>”Prepare yourself Anonymous for the vision you will go on. One moment you are here, and the next...”
>You are gone.
“In eternity, where there is no time, nothing can grow, nothing can become. Nothing changes. So death created time, to grow the things that it will kill. And you are reborn. But into that same life that you have always been born into.”
>You shudder awake with those words running through your head.
>Wherever you are, it is not that camp-fire in the savannah. You're surrounded by a fog. You feel neither cold nor heat.
>You feel as if a moment has passed since you have awoken, and yet at the same time you can hardly remember a time before the fog. Before this place.
>Anonymous moves to stand, separate from your own will. You want to simply close your eyes and fall asleep, return to the bosom of reality. And yet, here you stand.
>You return to your body, and you feel snow falling on you. How you could say it was snow you do not know. You cannot see it. Cannot feel the cold it should have. But you feel a thousand touches on your skin, and for some reason you imagine snow.
>You hold out your closed hand, and when you open it there is a single snowflake in your palm.
“Wow. I must be tripping balls.”
>You close your fist again and look around. There is only the fog for as far as you can see, but that is hardly any great distance.
>No, if you were going to get more from this vision quest than snow and fog you'd have to move.
>Putting one foot in front of the other, you move through that grey smoke.
>You could not say how far you walked, for this place is without landmarks, without definition.
>Nor could you say for how long you made your way. For this place is without time, without perception.
>But eventually you found yourself with stone beneath your bare feet. A curiosity. There's a noise behind you, and as you look you see yourself.
>In the darkness and shade of the fog, you can only see a single spire jutting out of the ground. And there at its root, lies you
>There's a hole in your chest. Blood dripping from that great wound slowly. Your shaking. Whispering something to yourself. Your copy glances up, towards something you cannot see, and then... He disappears.
“Okay... That's weird.”
>You turn again, and this time there's another copy ahead of you. Beneath your feet is dirt. Warm and wet.
>You gasp.
>The copy ahead has his chest open. You can see his heart and lungs and all the things that kept him going. Kept him breathing. Your shaking again. A blank look in your eyes. There are no final words before he collapses again into the fog.
“All right...”
>You close your eyes shut, force the sight of this place away from your mind. But even as you close your eyes you only feel as if you have opened them again. You try again and again to force your eyes to close. To force yourself to see nought. But you cannot close your eyes.
>You hold your arm over your eyes, to block the sights you see. To hide your own corpse appearing again and again. And again.
>There's screaming in your skull. It hurts to look away. It hurts to hide. The pain eventually grows so great that you cannot keep hiding. When you remove the comfort of your arm blocking your vision you gasp.
>Not one, not two, but nearly forty of your corpses are ahead of you. You can see all manner of wounds, illnesses and tragedies that have befallen your copies over and over and over again.
>The ages of these copies vary wildly. Some are so old their hair has started to go grey. Some younger than even you.
>And then they all dissolve. From time and memory, they fade. You know somehow that they are forgotten.
>You turn on your feet, and your heart stops for a moment.
>An older you sits at the foot of a great tree. Half of his face and body is burnt beyond relief. His hair ablaze. He looks to you with his one good eye, and to your horror, he speaks, with your voice.
>”Here again are we?”
>You dare not return the strange greeting.
>He shrugs, and ash falls from his shoulders.
>”No matter. When you awaken you shall know what I know. Remember what I remember. And you will eventually come here again, just to say the same things.”
>Your copy waves his arms to where the dozens of copies of you once lay dying.
>”You are trapped. By this nightmare you keep waking up into. You shall not be remembered. You shall be forgotten. Even you will forget your time. Your friends and loved ones will remember a different face. A different name. And you shall be reborn. But into the same life.”
>You don't understand him.
>”Do not be just another one of them. Make sure they cannot hope to envision one of their own doing what you did. If you cannot be remembered as yourself, at least be something different from them.”
>He moves to stand.
>”Why should they get to remember? To be remembered? Why are you here, only to die over and over again? Did you deserve this?”
>In the back of your mind, you remember a mantra you used to tell yourself.... Something... Something about the world we create.
>And then you remember. You've been dying here over and over again. Everyone you loved, lost or died after you cannot even remember who you were. They attach your failings and accomplishments on a stranger. And you cannot escape. You cannot go back home.
>You've been here before. And you will again.
>”Make yourself unlike any other. Make them unwilling to attach yourself to one of their own. Be something fouler than them. And you shall be remembered.”
>For how long had you been visiting this place? For how much longer would you keep coming here again and again?
>What were you compared to the Anonymous' that came before. And the Anonymous' yet to come.
>What you be remembered as? Some Zebra that didn't even look like you? Some animal?
>You were better than that. You deserved to be remembered. You had to make them remember.
>And as the flames grow on your copy sitting in the roots of that tree, you watch the spear in his hand stay cold. Fight against the flames.
>It all comes to you. You would have your legacy. You would be infamous. You would make sure that those that came after you were gone wouldn't even wish to attach your accomplishments and trophies to any one of their own kind. Perhaps even any kind.
>Eternity stretches before you, as it always has, even without you knowing.
>And you are gone.

And that's the end of part 2! Don't worry, we'll have more Celestia/Anon stuff later, but that's all for now. Thank you for reading, hope you have a great day!
>And that's the end of part 2! Don't worry, we'll have more Celestia/Anon stuff later, but that's all for now. Thank you for reading, hope you have a great day!

Well with how fast this is going and the direction this seems to be trying to move, I don't think I'll be having a great day dwelling on what direction this story is currently going.
Sorry man. Don't worry, I have said before it shall have a happy ending eventually
>anon found lying on the street with no expression
>anon no longer has the engaging conversations he used to and doesn't speak as much anymore
>breaks leg after falling down a crumbling bluff
>just sits silently looking at the bone sticking out of his leg until zecora finds him several hours later
>barely eats in hospital

>black liquid starts leaking into the fabric of reality
>ponies start dreaming of cannibalism, infanticide, suicide, etc
>worse, their sense of disgust with these things begins to atrophy
>Luna can barely do anything to the dreams >the ponies don't want to dislike these things and don't know they're dreaming no matter what
>can't touch the slime, it's part of reality now
>psychologists become fully booked as the effected freak out as they realize that they're changing

>dark thought dreams reach anon
>though entity immediately fuses like two separated magnets coming together
>slime evaporates
>anons normal
>mentally changed ponies return to normal
>everyone's slightly freaked but okay
>anon doesn't even realize the thought entity existed
>thinks the mind entering spell was just a bit botched
>no more screaming dreams
>back to a totally normal human
>swears off mind magic

>twilight and company are at a loss on what to do
>not in the butt!
>that's how you get pregnant
It makes sense if you look at it this way.
Love, Friendship, and other emotions and feelings for ponies are ACTUAL magic. And Magic has limits as seen multiple times.
Even negative emotions, like anger and hate, seen in NMM and the Alicorn Amulet, they magnify those emotions to provide magic, eventually destroying the host.

Humans don't have magic, so our emotions and feelings are just that, emotions and feelings, and without magic there is no danger of being so angry or so full of love that your body physically rends itself apart.

So humans are an endless supply of for them magic in theory, a changling who is loved by a human would never want for anything, but if you took a humans anger, hate and natural instincts, they would self-propegate and infect the area.

Humans can be the solution to all their problems or the cause of their demise.

Humans ARE the potential of Nuclear Power to them.
>humans make perfect prisons for dark entities
>because humans are born chained to an inner "monster" (random intrusive thoughts) they must struggle to control
>the vast majority are so good at it that they dont even notice it beyond fleeting "lol wouldn't it be crazy if x happened" moments
Anon becomes a hero in Equestria by having magic cast on him that allows him to absorb and store incorporeal evils when?
Um, did you mean anthro or the shoulders being canon?
He meant the shoulders, hence his pic realted.
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>tfw you will never have a buggo gf
>tfw she will never be able to transform into anything that you want
>Tightest cunt you've ever and will ever fuck? Check
>Teats so big that you can titfuck her for hours?
>A nonexistent gag reflex and the ability to shallow your loads while still sucking you off? Triple check
>Able to change her bug cum into any flavor? She does that for you every morning
>But what she loves the most is that out of all of your fetishes, after all of the transformations, what you prefer the most is her unchanged self
Alot of the time it's war, most advanced technologies were made for war in one way or another.
What a cute bug. Would fill her with love
>"Hello! Could you give me a name?"
>Anon shatters the flash and the dwarf dies from exposure
... that look a lot like the prompt for Naruto.
I'm watching you, weeaboo.
Weebs can't even pick a good anime when they decide to show off how weird they are. It's always entry-tier bullshit when they start to show their true colors.
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How bothersome
Those are some nice shades.
>Weeb Anon in RGRE
>realizes he can be a walking anime reference with his potential
>deliberately goes looking for powerful dangerous incorporeal beings so he can try to trap them in his mind
>Mane Six chase after Anon to stop his stallionish whimsy from killing him
>Anon absorbs a fuck ton of wendigos.
>this is a bad thing somehow.
>Mane 6 convince him to let them out.
>Harmony magic forces him to sing let it go.
>Anon absorbs a fuck ton of wendigos
>Gets sick new ice powers
>The wendigos are rendered inert, meaning ponies can be as racist to each other as they want without being stalked by scary ice demons
Everybody wins
>He sings the psychicpebbles version
>Anon keeps giggling like a little idiot when ponies worry about the snow he creates, and he responds with "the cold never bothered me anyway"
>Mares are confused by weebanon
>Sometimes he's an innocent oblivious everyman and other times he's a hyperactive blonde kid shouting 'believe it!'
>Believe it!
>Not Dattebayo!
It's like you're not even a real weeb.
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I think that Anon needs to develop better taste in anime
Good work on this update phantoma.
Is that a reference to central nervous system anon? Or am I reading into it more than I should?
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I want her to bite my dick and turn me into a changeling. And then feed eggs into my scrotum while her tongue ravages my now bleeding dick.
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Fucking slaaneshi cultist
>Anime Anon in Equestria
>Only he's from a terrible hentai
Anime Anon except he's a shounen harem protag who intentionally avoids every flag and event.
I want a harem protag that gets restraining orders against them.
>Your favourite cake is either a Celestial sponge cake
Or what? It's either that or what?
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I like that past life of his. He's pretty metal.
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I agree, the only solution to his existence is a lead slug.
>Anon uses his new hard hand as a hammer
>Chrysalis is dumbfounded at the extent of this colt's whimsy
Either that or nothing. That's how much he loves it; it's Celestial sponge cake, or nothing at all.
>Anon remembered the Best-In-The-Tall-Don't-Remember-What-Fucking-Shitty-Name.
Well, that's a worst-case scenario for Celestia.
Bad end.
This is awesome, dude!
>One if Anyone's deaths was him starving to death in a ginger strike when they stopped making the sponge cake
Great update but the foreboding of the next one gives me pause. I don't know how much I'm going to enjoy it but I shall push forward. Your story has been worth it so far.
>ginger strike
Shit, meant hunger, but that does open up some possibilities of it's own
Judging from a few lines here and there, particularly the bit about ages when our guy has only been around for a few weeks, i dont think burnt face man is the Beast in the long grass.
But the anon that's having this vision is that guy, and this is his origin.
Which is super not great for that anon as it looked like he already had a zebra waifu in the works. Hope she doesnt get killed as the first act of the beast
She'll likely be one of his last I bet.
well... i think we just saw the beast in the long grass. his motive was to set himself apart as no pony, minotaur, or whatever and set himself so unique that history would have no choice but to remember him as something different, and he succeeded. so now the question is where is anon going to go from there on out? continue remembering? try to force history to remember him as something different through less murderous means? break the cycle and finally die for good and earn eternal rest? find a way to be immortal and never die again (and perhaps a love interest with Tia and/or Luna)?
That's how you can tell this is an absolute fantastic writer
What do you guys think about "bachelor herds", i.e. stallions who aren't gay but hang out anyway?
probably happens more in areas where mares are more predatory in their acquisition of stallions or there's a greater ratio of mares to stallions; safety in numbers and all that
>TFW Popped is dead.
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>Anon if you call me a deernicorn one more time I'm converting this room into a rape dungeon.
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"My deer Rain, what makes you think that's not the next step in my master plan?"
"...and that i will be it's prisoner?"
>"But, Anon, I'm tired!" whines Chrysalis as she flops over the kitchen counter. "Can't you handle the baking yourself?"
"You need to help somewhere, Chryssi. I'm already going to be running the front counter by myself."
>"Which is ridiculous," she cuts in with a pout. "As the stallion, you should focus on the food while I handle the bits and customers."
>The pout becomes a full-on scowl.
>"All those thirsty mares, eyeing you up, flirting. Ugh! It makes me want to bite someone's face off just thinking about it."
"Which is why I'll be handling the customers. You don't exactly have the best people skills, and we can't have you mauling ponies. You're on thin ice with the princesses already."
>A timer goes off, and Anon nods towards the oven as he finishes decorating a batch of cookies.
>Green, cream cheese frosting with black sprinkles, of course.
>Chrysalis doesn't even look as her horn glows, opening the oven door and pulling the tray of fresh cookies out to set them on a cooling rack.
>"That's untrue and you know it. I have excellent people skills. I'm a changeling, after all. Pretending to be civil towards our prey is a necessary life skill."
"Still, you don't exactly have the best reputation," Anon continues. "Ponies might be too intimidated by you to want to buy cookies."
>"One, they should be intimidated by a superior being," she points out, grabbing a newly frosted cookie and taking a bite. "And two, I can disguise myself."
>In a flash, the unicorn, Shutter Bug is in the changeling's place.
"They'd figure it out, I'm sure," Anon says, pointing a frosting spatula at his lover. "And don't eat the products."
>"But they're tasty," she defends, crumbs flying from her mouth.
>She smirks, and adds, "The Cakes won't know what hit them."
"They're just cream cheese sugar cookies with pistachios," Anon says. "Good, sure, but I really chose them because the Cakes don't have anything similar on their menu. Same with the white velvet cookies there."
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>white velvet
i had a feeling someone in this thread had patrician taste
I'm not going to lie, I think scars are hot and I have a few from accidents and animal attacks. Two good ones on my face from getting hit by a car and a small explosion from a home made new years bomb. I'd probably nut if there was a cute mare with the same.
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popped was always dead
>ginger strike
>Equestria taxes ginger root by a lot
>Anon is outraged on principle
>Goes on a hunger strike until prices go back down
>Celestia doesn't talk about that iteration of Anon
>Sometimes Anon just does dumb things in Equestria
>Not mentioning Fizzlepop
>"No taxation without representation!"
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found that incarnation's sweetheart
"A right to bear arms that shall not be infringed!"
>Patriot waifu climaxes violently at his words
>The stallions think they're safe since there's so many of them
>The mares now pursue them even more than before because there's so many of them
>"At some point, they'll ditch the fat one or the slow one so that the rest of them can escape."
>These stallion groups end up behaving like groups of antelopes being chased by predators
>Chrysalis eyes the new batch with hunger, tongue flicking out to taste the air, but as soon as her horn begins to glow, Anon flicks the spatula in his hand, and a dollop of frosting splatters on her horn.
>"Hey!" she whelps, wiping the sugary gunk off of her horn.
"Those are for the customers."
>"I was just going to try one!"
"You tried them when I first tested the recipe."
>"It's quality testing!" she argues, reverting to her true form. "We should insure each batch is as good as can be for these ingrates."
>Anon sighs, putting down the last decorated cookie.
"Fine," he says, getting the changeling to grin. "We'll split one."
>The grin fades a second, but eventually she nods.
>"Fair." she agrees as Anon walks around the counter, grabbing a still-warm cookie as he goes.
>She raises an eyebrow as the human stops across from her and places the cookie half hanging in his mouth.
>She's confused until his eyes flick down expectantly at the small pastry, a playful glint to them.
>Getting it, she smirks and leans forward, her own maw engulfing the exposed half of the cookies and biting down.
>As her fangs cleave the cookie in two, she stays there, lips leaving a chaste kiss on her lover's before they both start to chew.
>Swallowing in unison, she hums at the pleasant flavor, eyes half-lidded.
>"You are a very corny male, Anon," she whispers.
"And you love it," he counters cockily.
>"We all have our flaws," she says with a chuckle, leaning in to kiss him more deeply.
>Anon returns the kiss, enjoying the taste of sugar on her lips.
>Starting this business has kept them both busy, and he is glad for this quick respite and return to simpler days.
>He doesn't regret what he's doing, and he truly hopes it works.
>Hopes that all of this will keep her around this time.
>He doesn't know what he'll do if Chrysalis runs off on him again.
Fizzle is pure sex in the shape of a horse.
Can't argue with you there. Fizzlepop is probably the best thing to come out of that movie. Too bad we can't get an Emily Blunt or Kristen Chenoweth soundalike for the show.
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>>A timer goes off, and Anon nods towards the oven as he finishes decorating a batch of cookies.
>It sure was difficult with his hand still covered in that healing goop from before, but Anon has adapted well enough to complete the task.
Well, taking into account this is opening day and that the shop is assumingly fixed up, this is probably long after he got his hand cocooned.
>"Anon, honey, sweetheart, love of my life - lemme goop that hand up one more time."
"For the last time, Chrysalis, one goop-ing is enough to heal it. And I was never injured-"
>"I don't know how healing works for hoo-mans, Anon."
"And I was never-"
>"For all I know, you need three or four doses."
"And I was n-"
>"What if you never heal?! What if your hoof-spiders are injured forever?!"
>"...there's no need to shout, Anon, I can hear you just fine."
Quiet. You're making me pressured to write when I have homework on my plate.
>>He doesn't know what he'll do if Chrysalis runs off on him again.

>Sometimes buggy instincts kick in extra-hard in Chrysalis
>She wakes up in the dead of night with her brain screaming at her to find a proper location to build a hive
>She tries to fight it off, but it's intense and deep-rooted
>Similar to how a pony becomes frightened for their life if they break a leg (even if they're safe in a hospital bed), Chrysalis has trouble thinking rationally and cannot shove these urges away
>After Anon spent a solid week looking for Chrysalis, he ultimately finds her about a kilometer into the Everfree, hiding under a large rock and having already dug an impressively large tunnel
>Now Anon has traps outside his house
>Half-dug holes with cover over top of them, luring Chrysalis to them when she escapes into the night; Anon finds her curled up like a cat in a cardboard box when the morning comes
>He also leaves pony mannequins around the perimeter of his property
>If the holes in the lawn don't stop Chrysalis, the "ponies" standing around just begging to be gooped up and hauled back to one of the yard-holes will
>More than once, Anon was woken up to Chrysalis huddling in the mud under a pile of mannequins and green goop
>Chrysalis is always rather embarrassed once she comes back to her senses
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Everyone ready for VALENTINE'S DAY?
It's fun to see the couples.
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>dem thighs
princess of lust more like
I always look forward to these updates, m8. You don't disappoint.
>not allowing her to repurpose your basement
>Implying Chrysalis has the patience to understand building codes and structural supports
>"I want to put a hole here."
"Well, that's a load-bearing support."
>"But the hole has to go there! It's one of the entrances!"
"That's too bad, because the house will lose structural integrity if you remove the support and put a hole there. Put it somewhere else."
>"But I want it there! My master design includes a hole right THERE!"
"The house will collaps-"
>not constructing additional pylons so your loved one can have her hole where she wants it
Lets be honest, if she says the hole has to be there, it hast to be.
Shes an expert on those afterall.
>home made new years bomb
>a small explosion from a home made new years bomb
I don't feel even a little bit of sympathy for you, Anon. Not gonna lie.
nigger prompt was to be her partner in crime.
The goal is total global domination through the baking empire. Those with inferior product will be brought into line under the reign or fall and be crushed under the tread of progress
It had nothing to do with weebshit. You're projecting. I was thinking more like rune magic or spirit rituals.
So do you.
I want her to shove her proboscis all the way down my dick and suck my jizz out from the source while blowing me.
happy valentines anons
>tfw no marefriend
>Chrysalis takes over the industry, every bakery now having her name on it.
>Things aren't much different other than them all requiring her name on the building and her color scheme.
>Chrysalis' SugarCube Corner does look odd in black and turquoise, though.
Lmao you spicy deernicorns need to get better at threats. Try coming up with something I won't actively enjoy because I'm so lonely and starved of intimacy, idiot.
>not having bugbutt build up the bakery so it's more or less another castle in ponyville
>not pissing off twilight for blocking her favorite vantage point with a completely pointless expansion upward
it's like you don't even petty villiany anon
Truth be told all anime sucks. There are some that suck a little less than others, and there are some that can be considered almost cool. Almost.
There has been not a single anime made in the last 20 years that has made me feel anything except pity for all those poor weeaboo saps who fell for the japan meme.
do you have the same opinion of manga? some of them are real gems
thanks to the anon who linked this the other week, it was solid gold
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I actually really liked that one.
On the subject of manga, I can't really find any fault with them unless they're pants-shittingly bad. I don't necessarily like them either. Like a comic it would depend on if the art is good and the story and dialogue can hold my attention.
Coltish Whimsy is indistinguishable from not being phased by whatever tiny horse bullshit you are being subjected to.
>Colts Anonymous.
>Join for keks
>Find out it's a support groups for colts who have realized how fucked their world is.
>"We have demons living in a pit and the only hope to stop their inevitable escape are 6 INCREDIBLY autistic mares that use the power of friendship."
>"Maybe next time someone tries to attack we use those crossbows we have and see if multiple entry wounds are enough."
>Anon starts piecing together all the bullshit he overlooked because he thought it was all cutesy horse problems.
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Hope you fags aren't being sadsacks over >tfw no gf today
awww, that was some good 'n comfy stuff there.
>Diane lived inside her head.
>Why would she not?
>Inside of her head was Equestria, and all of her bestest friends.
>There, she partied all day with little ponies and got to bake the tastiest treats.
>When she awoke to the 'real' world on those rare, horrible occasions, things were only drab and saddening in comparison.
>No colors.
>No smiles.
>No cupcakes.
>It was always a struggle to bury herself back down before the harshness of that reality could sap her of all her joy.
>And this would be one of those times.
>She had gone to bed after throwing the greatest birthday party for her friend, Twilight, a smile on her face, only to wake up once more to this place.
>At least this time, it wasn't on a stiff, thin mattress with nothing but four white walls to look at.
>No, this time, she was naked, her oddly hairless skin wet as she sat in a tub of warm water.
>And something coarse was rubbing down her back.
>She looks to her side at the man currently giving her a sponge bath,
>It's been a long time since she's seen one of those, but if she's remembering correctly, he's not too bad looking, for a human
"So, Diane, what's been new with you?" he says, not looking from his work as he scrubs her lower back and bottom. "Good dreams, I hope?"
>He runs the sponge up her side across her ribs showing there, and her lips tremble
"Nothing much changed for me. Well, besides being dumped. She said I don't talk enough, can you believe it? I talk plenty! Heck, I talk with you every day."
>He sighs, lifting her arms up to get her armpit.
"If only I could find a girl as easy to talk to as you, Diane."
>She giggles as he tickles her, and he freezes
>"It's Pinkie Pie," she says with a smile. "Pinkamena if you really want to be weird, but Diane is my middle name. It's silly to call me that."
>He stares at her, mouth open
"Holy shit," he breathes. "You're awake."
>I'd argue this is the dream and Equestria is real, but that's just perspective, right? Anyway, hi! What's your name?"
You mean "Must buy sworn thot something lest be nagged for all eternity" day? Yeah, I just got back from a midnight run to get some flowers and a stupid card.
Hmmm. Continue.
oh shit I see her becoming a jervis tetch sort of character
Not sure if I'd continue, but if I did, I'd have to work some things out.
The first question for a continuation is whether or not she's actually in a psych ward, or in a house with her family paying a live-in nurse to take care of her?
It's a good premise nonetheless. Give it a go if you have the time. Maybe she's recently been moved back home and is under the care of a live-in nurse.
Whoa, déjà vu. I swear, I've read these exact words on this general before many years (6?) back.
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Is the "real" world RGR, or not?
Cause while it would go a bit against the grain, a miraculously recovering Pinkie having RGR values in a normal world could be interesting, at least for a little while
I was kind of thinking not and having it just being another one of her many oddities on insanity.
Same. Ponk would try to wear the pants in the relationship and treat Anon like a dainty colt whether he liked it or not.
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>Life on the road was nice.
>You got to meet new people and see new places.
>Sometimes you had to haul a wagon or beat back a monster with a stick, both of which Trixie insisted she could do herself.
>You didn't put up a fuss about it, but you could tell when she needed help.
>It was a long day of travel today and Trixie had gone to bed almost immediately after dinner, leaving you to set up your tent.
>The mare made a fuss about you sleeping outside, but you kept saying that she needed the supplies.
>Hopping up, you head over to the wagon and open the door.
"Hey Trixie, I just need-"
>You're stunned into silence at the sight before you.
>On her hammock, as expected, was Trixie.
>What was not expected was her position.
>Or pose?
>You get down on one knee to try and see if she's still alive.
>Her head was lolling off the hammock at an odd angle, which was not nearly as much of an issue as the rest of her body.
>A horrible contortion of mish mashed limbs left you wondering if the magician screwed up some spell.
>Her front half was facing towards you while the back half faced the other way, but still tried to wrap around herself.
>It was disturbing.
>But you should really check and see if she's alive.
>You crouch down further and place an ear next to her mouth.
>Only to hear purring.
>Well, she's alive.
>You gently grab your tent and slink back out of the wagon, doing your best not to make a sound.
>You also make a mental note to check the next library you see for any books to find out if this is normal.
Every time I see a 'unicorns act like cats' green or any other variation of this, its bound to be good.
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>after this rejection Fluttershy joins Mares Going Their Own Way
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Why are you even putting up with a woman if you hate it so much?
A most hole and you can't stick your dick inside another dick. I've tried.
Overrated and also incredibly gay.
>Twi is sitting in a fat little unicorn loaf in the sunlit window, reading a book.
>Pick her up and watch her stretch into a thin furry tube.
>She would be annoyed, but the colt giggle and hug you give afterwards makes up for it.
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>Rarity is working on a project
>Nothing urgent just experimenting so you've decided to mess with her
>You take a little bauble, something sturdy, and put it on her workplace
>She stares at it, utterly enraptured before reaching out with a hoof to push it off
>She leans over the table to look at it before returning to her work allowing to reset the bable
Global singles awareness day
Get your single-itis checked by a professional soon, no one wants to get early onset wizardry
The more you know
>That's just how things were done on the rock farm
>Pinkie just does it because it's how she was raised to believe things should be
>It's the most innocent case of sexism you've ever seen
>She honestly believes that colts belong in the kitchen or the bedroom, but still sees you as an equal
>Gets really upset when a mare calls you a walking cock or something like that and goes on a tirade about how nice and fun you are and how happy you are together
>Gives you a big hug and, after the moment is over, gently chastises you because when you brought her lunch an hour ago, you didn't bring her a cider to go along with
>"It's okay, Nonny. I know colts can be kinda air-headed and forgetful."
>You'd be vaguely offended, but her genuine and caring smile makes it clear that there was no condescension behind her words
>A romantic relationship with Pinkie Pie is really strange
>Visit Ponyville next
>Hear they have a great library
>Go to find the librarian, not sure if you should start your search under "unicorns" or "felines"
>Find the purple librarian unicorn taking a nap
>She's in an even more bizarre position than Trixie was
>She's even hugging a toy to her chest, and her rear legs are giving little kicks every few seconds.
It must be so easy to distract unicorns.

>Thing on the edge of the table that must be pushed off
>Box that needs to be sat inside
>Sunbeam to nap in
>Lap to snuggle up onto
>Horse-nip toy that demands attention and produces a mild high
>Blankets to hide under
>High up surfaces to sit on

So if you married a unicorn, would she crawl out of bed at 3 in the morning, walk into the bathroom, face the wall, and howl until you came to investigate?
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>tfw nearing wizardry
>tfw there never was any wizard powers
>Anon goes into the library and finds pic related
>Tries to ask her for help but she insists he can't see her
>Anon just goes into the other room to get her to follow him
>"Happy Valentine's Day baby."
>Your girlfriend smiles at you across the table.
"Happy Valentine's babe."
>You respond with a smile as well.
>Both of you spent a while making dinner, which doesn't look half bad for two people that aren't that good at cooking.
>Sunset was many things, she was smart, sexy, a great gamer, an amazing lover, and compassionate too.
>Especially since she took you in when you somehow ended up in this crazy world.
>But she was by no means a cook.
>Her version of a cookbook was a collection of take out menus.
>You weren't much better, but you could at least make grilled cheese.
>So this pasta dinner was the best you both ever did.
>"Well, let's dig in big boy. You'll need your strength for later."
>She says pushing out her chest, giving you a nice look at her beautiful breasts.
>"I'm wearing that underwear you like."
>She says with a bit of a blush.
>She wasn't much on wearing sexy clothes often, something about being unmarely, but she knew you loved to see her in them.
"What a coincidence, I'm wearing those ones you like too."
>You tell her with a grin.
>Her eyes widen and she starts undressing you with her eyes.
>You weren't big on the sexy underwear either, but fuck if she didn't go wild when you wore them.
>"Why don't we just skip the food and go right to bed?"
>You're not sure at this point.
>On one hand, you just spent a few hours making an edible meal.
>But on the other hand... sex.
>This choice has clearly been made for you.
>As you are about to get up, Sunset's phone starts ringing.
>"It's Twilight? Why is she calling now?"
Look at that horse. She deserves a kiss and a hug on horse-valentine's day. I don't care if it would brand me a slut: I'd set up a booth and give free hugs to date-less mares.
The simple solution is for Anon to tie a string to the back of his belt that's long enough to drag on the floor. No unicorn will be able to resist following him.
>>As you are about to get up, Sunset's phone starts ringing.
>>"It's Twilight? Why is she calling now?"

>"Sunset, it's Twilight! Listen, you know that box I have under my bed labeled "oh god I'm so lonely please love me" that has that $400 sex toy in it? It's uh... stuck in my... my FRIEND'S vagina and I-SHE needs help getting it out. Please respond."
>Loose boner from laughing
>Go save Twilight the nerd that bought her high score
>Go home an fug
I think that is about right in the order.
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>Anon does this and proceeds to walk around town
>Watches as unicorns fight for the string
>Asks the winner for a date after she runs the others off
Survival of the fittest
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You fuckers gonna add a pic to the wall this year?
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>Tfw you're nearing 30 and still no colt wants to touch your veevee.
>Tfw it isn't even bad back there, you shower fairly regularly and have good hygiene.
>Tfw you're already a wizard so you don't even have that to look forward to. Would that make you a scientist then?
>Tfw you would pledge your life to the very next stallion who walked into your library and gave you the time of day.
I think you mean survival of the knit-est
>Be Anon.
>Be confused by the jargon that seems to make more than half of this book about O&O a certain purple princess gave you as a mean to explain the mechanics to you.
>Be walking into this library/gamestore to ask the clerk for help.
>Be mildly intimidated by the expression on the cream colored unicorn mare's face.
>Be surprised when she basically proposes to you.
"Just like in the Neighganese Manegas..."
>Moondancer finishes that "I would marry the next station etc etc" thought
>In wanders Anon to her store
>Bee-lines to her and asks pointed and (relatively) education questions about tabletop games
>Mentions he usually makes unicorn characters because of their usefulness and "because they're much cuter than pegasi or earth ponies"
>Moondancer decides that this is all a sign from the above that she's found her soulmate
>All this talk about manga
>No talks about Light Novels
>Be a slightly uncomfortable Anon.
>"Uh... I'm really flattered you would say that but...
>She gives you a look that makes you feel like you kicked a puppy, then tossed that puppy into a wood chipper to be ground down into food for other puppies.
>You laugh nervously, still not used to receiving this kind of attention from the opposite sex
>"Maybe we could try going on a date first and then see where it goes from there?"
>Light Novels
What are you Anon, gay?
>Make the mistake of putting shiny beads on the string
>Now the pegasi are interested as well.
>Twilight, now with 2 of her 3 sides invested, tries to chase everyone else off like a mare possessed.
Light novels are cool, but they definitely have more garbage then gems
>Anon gets sucked into Equestria during the middle of Mardis Gras
>Got shit faced before he could hand his beads out
>Now Twilight has to try and contain herself and absolutely NOT take advantage of the drunk colt
>She just hopes he sobers up before the other princesses find out about him
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>Twilight spots him
>Urges from two pony races light up
>"I've never been more turned on in my entire life."
>Cue Rainbow Dash and Twilight wrestling as they both try to chase Anon and catch the string
>And then Rarity and Fluttershy quietly swoop in and carry him off
>Rarity has her butterfly wings
>One of them smothers Anon's face in her tuft as they fly away
Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie are top herd.
>male-dominated society
>women having fetishes is hot
>it's usually pregnancy and inflation though
>female-dominated society
>men having fetishes is hot
>it's usually partialism (boobs or butts but not both) or feet though
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I just want to eat mare ass and snuggle
I'm a simple nigga
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I have a rule about not sticking my dick in anything that isn't yet potty trained...
Seriously, she'd better be able to use the bathroom on her own. (I ain't no yearling fucker.)
Of course she knows how to shit in a toilet. They just like to bat things off tables and she'll gently poke you in the face until you get up and do your stallionly duty and make her breakfast.
I like the prompt where ponies are incredibly child-like and the Princesses are the only ponies who are like adults so when Anon and Celestia get together everypony basically considers them 'Mommy' and 'Daddy'.
>Unicorns are needy creatures
>They will yowl and holler when in need and usually like to play
>But by far the most annoying then about being in a relationship with one is breakfast
>Sometimes you just want to sleep in
>That's not a bad thing right?
>Well apparently your marefriend thinks so
>She'll take a plate or a bowl and just scoot it around the floor until you wake up
>If she was feeling really uppity she'd toss it down some stairs to listen to it clunk down the steps
Those are pretty good. Celestia is just thrilled to have found a male who doesn't consider her his surrogate mother, and Anon thinks it's super adorable that a bunch of knee-to-thigh high ponies walk up to him with their tails wagging and big smiles on their faces and say "Daddy, look at what I drew!"
But when that shit's not happening, they are the biggest cuddlers you'll ever see. You'll have to put effort into NOT cuddling them, and they get so sad when you stop.
I prefer the prompts where they're fully functional adults, they just cant help but see celestia as a mother figure.
>Royal guard have it especially bad and are the first to start accidently calling Anon 'Dad' during an outdoors survival exercise (i.e camping trip).
>>Royal guard have it especially bad and are the first to start accidently calling Anon 'Dad' during an outdoors survival exercise (i.e camping trip).

>"Aw, jeez, I did it again. This shit's the worst."
I'd jingle my keys really angrily and send her scurrying
>2 or more newborn unicorns are called a "litter"
I require more
Moonie is perfect and I love her
>She's awake?!" Liana shrieks through the speaker of the telephone. "What's she doing now?!"
Anon brings the phone back to his ear and says. "Uh, finishing up her bath. She kind of, ah, came to in the middle of me washing her."
>"She would choose a moment like that," Liana grumbles. "Listen, just try to, I dunno, keep her with you until we show up. Mariana and I will be there as soon as we can. Shit, Mads is still on the expedition thing or whatever."
>Anon winces a little at that and feels pity for the geologist.
>Time was of the essence, Diane hardly staying lucid for long in these instances, and it would already be a stretch for the twins to be able to make it in time to see their sister awake.
>The man doubted Madalyn would be seeing her younger sister this time around.
"I'll see what I can do," he says. "Talk to her, keep her engaged as much as I can" Looking over his shoulder where the sounds of splashing were coming from, he bites the inside of his cheek. "But I've got to go now. Can't do that if I'm on the phone."
>"Yeah, do what you need to," Liana is saying as she audibly scrambles on the other end. "We'll be there in an hour- Mariana! Get your butt down here! D's awake and we're going to see her!"
>The call ends abruptly, and Anon slips the cell in his pocket before turning around.
>Okay, he needs to try and convince a girl who's spent the bulk of the last eight years effectively dream walking to not go back to said dream.
>How the hell is he supposed to compete with whatever Equestria had waiting for her?
>With a small shake of his head, he heads towards the bathroom and opens the door.
>It's kind of awkward seeing the girl naked now, despite having seen it plenty of times before, but she doesn't seem to mind.
>In fact, she seems too busy shaping a beard out of bubbles to even notice he's come in.
>One the first thing's she asked upon waking up was, "Where's the bubbles?" and Anon quickly added the solution to the water.
i thought the spoopy horse was gonna fuck the spoopy dude
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She still sounds adorable even though she's a vegetable most of the time.
I like the old All-Father Anon prompts where he was immortal and idolized by all races as the perfect ideal of fatherhood.

And all the other races were jealous of the Minotaurs, who constantly bragged about being Anon’s literal descendants resulting from a drunken night with a cow millennia ago.
I liked the moonponies green we shitposted about for a few threads.
>I'm respecting your autonomy as queen by knocking but i'm asserting my authority as your husband by coming in anyway!
"Nice beard you've got there," Anon says as he shuts the door behind him. "Wish I could grow one like that."
>It sounded corny to him even as he said it, but Diane, or Pinkie as she preferred, looked up and smiled brightly
>"Nonny!" she cheers, throwing her arms up. "You're back!"
"Yeah, I was just making a phone call," he says, coming closer to kneel by the tub. "Having fun?"
>"You betch'cha! Hey, if you want a beard, too, I can sculpt you one."
>She holds up hands filled with soap in askance, and you shake your head
"Tempting, but I'll have to take a rain check."
>"Ah..." she moans, hands dropping below the water
>The disappointment doesn't last before she's back to her cheery self, holding out a hand
>Anon blinks at the small, soggy wrapped piece of candy in confusion
"Pinkie, where'd you get-" he starts, taking the proffered treat, but stops as he looks at it more closely. "Is this... a cough drop?"
>"I found it in the cabinet," she explains, swirling her own cough drop in her mouth, the hardened medicine clacking against her teeth. "Mmm, minty."
>Anon huffs in amusement, and, in a moment of silliness, opens the wrap and pops it in his mouth
>The taste of menthol and soap rolls over his tastebuds, and he fights a grimace, but the wide, delighted smile from the girl in the tub is worth the unpleasant flavor
"So..." he starts uncertainly.
>"So... "she mimics with a tilt of her head. "Where am I?"
"Um, excuse me?"
>"Last time I woke up, it was in the bad place with the meanies, but you're not mean, and this is a really nice bathtub. There's even a rubber ducky!"
>She demonstrates by giving the toy a squeeze, a loud squeak penetrating the steamy air.
>Anon has to think about it for a bit, then realizes, his heart growing heavy in his chest.
>"You mean the psychiatric hospital," he says. "Yeah, that was a bad place."
>The girl's expression becomes somber
>"It really was," she whispers, hugging her knees. "Why am I not there now? Did you save me?"
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I miss the moonponies
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Kinda reminds me of a green made back in ~2012.
Ponk was in a pseudo-SCP place and anon was pressured to make friends with Ponk, who only ate sugar.
And she used sugar to rip open a portal and they were stuck in limbo. Never got finished.
I really like this but this doesn't feel like RGRE to me. Just putting that out there.
Ponk is the rgr one, everyone else is normal.
>Pinkie is actually has psychic powers like being able to predict the future, which slowly drove her insane and put her into this delusion of Equestria in order to cope.
>Also she can make things asplode with her mind so she was quietly locked away in a place she would do no harm.
I'd trade pinkie for twiggles in a heartbeat tho. Otherwise, your tastes are on-point.
>Of course she knows how to shit in a toilet.
The phrasing heavily indicated the whole "cat meowing to go out, only to come right back in again the moment you shut the door" thing. Except, she was in the bathroom, indicating she was trying to get your attention to help her with the toilet.
Gotta be clearer next time, sempai.
>>Well apparently your marefriend thinks so
>>She'll take a plate or a bowl and just scoot it around the floor until you wake up
>>If she was feeling really uppity she'd toss it down some stairs to listen to it clunk down the steps
"You want me to have energy for sex, you'd best let me get a solid 8 hours."
Oh. Well, in my head, the scenario is "perfectly intelligent pony that otherwise behaves like a pony would, but also has cat-like behaviour exhibited in ways that are cute".
>Cue frustrated cat-horse noises
Boys, here's the perfect Hearth's Warming present for your mares.
If unicorns are cat and pegasi are birb does that mean earth ponies are like dogs? Will your earth pony marefriend bury stuff in the yard she wants to find later and chase off intruders making loud [horse noises]?
>Unicorns are cats
No, that's pegasi.
Do they make ungodly yowling sounds and present their hindends to you whenever you try to walk somewhere when they're in heat?
>Sometimes your unicorn will want to go outside.
>But as soon as you let them out they demand to come back in
>This takes a few passes before they call you silly and go lie down somewhere.

>”Anon my food’s all gone!!!”
>Your reach over to spread her food to cover the hole she ate in it.
>”Powerful human magic.”
>Anon I don't trust that mailmare that keeps coming around. She's always got this look in her eye where you can't even tell what she's thinking.
Does anyone actually know the canon order of age for the Pie sisters?
I think I've heard that Limestone is supposed to be the oldest and Marble the youngest, and Maud is supposed to be Pinkie's older sister.
I think that makes the order, from oldest to youngest:
Also, I've seen it tossed around that Pinkie and marble are fraternal twins.
Personally, it always felt like Maud and Pinkie would be the oldest.
You got it right. Limestone is the oldest, Maud is the second oldest, Marble is the youngest, and Pinkie is older than Marble by a few seconds.
>Also, I've seen it tossed around that Pinkie and marble are fraternal twins.
Pinkie literally says it.
>>”Anon my food’s all gone!!!”
>>Your reach over to spread her food to cover the hole she ate in it.
Which are better to snuggle in RGRE and why: Cat ponies, or dog ponies?
Yeah, no.
Im looking at this and all I can think of is what would happen when her mane gets tangled in this brushie.
I seen plenty videos of gory lathe accidents, imagining a mare staring in one of them terrifies me.
"Um, no," he answers truthfully. "That'd be your sisters. Mostly Madalyn, though."
>"Madalyn?" she asks with an inquisitive tilt of her head. "You mean Maud?"
>Knowing her pension for odd names, he figures that's probably right, and nods.
"Yeah, Ma- um- Maud was the one who really suspected the staff there of mistreating you, and did some digging. From what I heard, when she came to pick you up, she ended up breaking the head doctor's nose, but because of the dirt she got on him and the whole hospital, he was too afraid to press charges."
>He shrugs, a small smile pulling at his lips.
"Didn't stop her from leaking everything she found to the news, and for the whole place to be shutdown by law enforcement. After that, she brought you here to her house and hired me to watch over you."
>Pinkie blinks owlishly.
>"This is Maud's place? Where is she?"
"Well, that's kind of why she hired me," he explains. "This is her house, but she's barely ever in it because of her geology work. She's constantly traveling around the world, and couldn't look after you herself because of it, so she pays me to be a live-in caretaker."
>He shrugs.
"And that's what I've been doing for the last year."
>"Wow..." she breathes in what appears to be shock. "A whole year, huh?" Suddenly she smiles salaciously. "I kind of regret all the sponge bathes I must have missed. It felt real nice when you were washing me, and you're kind of cute to boot."
>It's Anon's turn to look shocked, jaw working wordlessly for a few seconds as his cheeks burn.
>Pinkie giggles at the expression and splashes some water towards the confounded boy.
>"I'm just kidding, Nonny! Don't get all flustered."
"R-right," he manages finally. "A-anyway, your other sisters, Liana and Mariana, are actually on their way right now to come see you, but it'll probably be an hour."
>Pinkie scrunches her brow as she mouths the names.
>"You mean Limestone and Marble?"
> He nods and she grins.
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This is both sad but cute at the same time
Yeah, I can just imagine some poor poner getting a bit too close with their long flowing mane or tail.
Either one is gonna do some SERIOUS damage, and they probably will never have anything but a mass of scar tissue where it gets ripped off if it's not fatal.
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>Valentine's day
>they didn't get to be with their waifus
>they will never get to be with their waifus
>"That's great!" she exclaims, exploding out of the water to stand with her arms stretched over her head. "It's been so long since I got to see my sisters here! I can finally talk to them before going back to Equestria. Hey, Nonny, want to help me set up a party for when they get here...? Nonny?"
>Anon is too busy looking straight froward to answer, his head now waist-level with the girl.
>"Oh!" Pinkie says embarrassingly, hands coming down to cover her privates. "I forgot about the bits being front and center with humans. I'm used to having a tail for modesty's sake."
>She actually blushes as she lowers back into the tub.
>"Sorry for flashing you the goods like that. I know it's inappropriate to do to colts 'cause of their delicate sensibilities."
"Uh..." Anon drawls, blinking his eyes rapidly and shaking his head. "No, it's fine. Um, no harm done... But, if you're all washed up, now, we should probably get you dried and dressed before your sisters show up."
>"I'm with you on that first part, but why dress?"
"Do you really want to be covering your lap with your hands the whole time they visit?"
>"Hmm, good point. It'd be weird if I was showing off the ol' pink canoe the whole time. If only I had my party dress Rarity made me here."
"Don't worry about it," Anon tells her, standing to go grab a towel off the rack. "You've got plenty of clothes to wear- Madalyn made sure of it."
>"Really? I hope she didn't spend too much. Clothes are expensive."
>When Anon returns with the towel unfolded and stretched between his hands, Pinkie practically launches herself into it, nearly bowling Anon over in the process.
>"Mmm, fluffy," she hums as she spins around, twisting the towel around her shoulders.
>That still left most of her midriff and below exposed, and Anon averts his eyes.
"I'll go get your outfit ready while you handle this," he says, opening the door. "When you're dried off, I'll be in the room just down the hall and to the left."
>"Okey-dokie, Artichokey!"
I liked both of those and I miss them as well.

>>"You mean the psychiatric hospital," he says. "Yeah, that was a bad place."
>>The girl's expression becomes somber
>>"It really was," she whispers, hugging her knees. "Why am I not there now? Did you save me?"
Still my heart. Oh Pinkie.

What this >>33510049 Anon said. Please continue.

WTF?!? Of course that's a real thing. kek.
>I can finally talk to them before going back to Equestria.
Oh God.
More please. Thanks.
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>With that, Anon left and retreated to Pinkie's room.
>Having finally talked to the girl himself, he can actually understand Madalyn's design choices now.
>The room is painted a bright pink with little swirls and dots of blue and yellow meant to represent confetti and streamers.
>There's also plenty of stuffed animals, the bulk of which are reptiles, piled in the corner, having collected a thin layer of dust over the year.
>It had all seemed so immature for a grown woman in her early twenties, but now he can't help but think it's perfect.
>Going to the drawer, he quickly fishes out a pair of plain white cotton panties and ankle socks before moving onto shirts and pants.
>Not entirely sure what she would like, he decides on comfort.
>From what she was saying, anyway, the idea of getting dressed at all wasn't too important, so she'd prefer something simple and easy to move in.
>A pink T-shirt and some shorts, then.
>Laying it all out on the bed, Anon looks down and nods.
>This should work just fine.
>"When you said I was gonna have to wear clothes, I didn't think you meant I was getting dressed for a gala," Pinkie says from over his shoulders, getting Anon to jolt and whip his head around to look at the girl.
>Her eyes are wide and there's a light blush to her cheeks as she points.
>"And are those panties and s-socks...? L-lewd."
>Anon steps away and looks at her more closely.
>Her hair is still damp and mussy, but she looks dry for the most part, and has even wrapped the towel underneath her arms and around her chest, the end coming down to just barely cover her modesty.
"Pinkie," he says, hand on his chest. "Don't sneak up on me like that."
>She breaks her gaze away from the outfit to blink at him.
>"Sorry, I didn't mean to," she says. "These things are way quieter than hooves."
>She points down at her feet and wiggles her toes.
>Looking at how slight her frame is, he can believe her being able to walk around without any of the floorboards squeaking.
>"And are those panties and s-socks...? L-lewd."
kek. Keep up the good work famalam.
Question: Is the human world original gender roles (OGR), or is it RGR as well?
I'm personally hoping for RGR in the human world as well, both as a matter of preference AND because it would make FAR more sense for a wealthy human-maud to have hired a male to care for her mentally ill sister if the human world is RGR but it wouldn't make much sense at all in OGR due to the whole "regularly bathing and caring for a catatonic woman's body" thing.
>Really, he'd be surprised if she was more than a hundred pounds.
>In that moment, he resolved to get as much good food into her as he could while she was lucid.
>It's hard feeding someone when they barely react to the outside world, each bite of soup or porridge taking nearly a minute for the girl to listlessly chew and swallow.
>It was enough to know she was at least getting enough to live before, but now seeing just how bubbly and energetic Pinkie really is, he can't help but feel she should be far more filled-out than the almost gaunt figure she sports now.
>Putting that aside for later, he looks back to the clothes.
"What? You don't like them?" he asks.
>"It's too much," she repeats with a frown. "What if I have to go potty? I'd have to take it all off and put it back on when I'm done."
>"That's not, uh, that not how going potty works," Anon says dully. "You just, you know, pull the pants and underwear down and go."
>She purses her lips and squints her eyes.
>"Oh yeah, I think I remember that," she mumbles. "Still seems like a pain."
>Returning her attention to the clothes, she grabs up the shirt, turning it this way and that, then nods.
>"This should be enough, right?" she says as she pulls it over her head, letting the towel drop as she does.
>Once she pops her head through and wiggles her arms out, she looks down at herself and smiles.
>"See? This covers everything just fine," she says lifting her arms up.
>In doing so, she pulls the T-shirt's hem up, just barely revealing her belly-button and below to the man.
>"...Ooops. Sorry," she says, quickly dropping her arms and tugging her shirt down. "... Again."
"Maybe you should at least put on the underwear," he suggests.
>Okay, fine," she agrees, grabbing the small undergarment. "But the socks stay off. At east until after my sisters' visit."
>She smirks at Anon then.
"Then I'll put the sock, you naughty colt."
>She giggles
>"I'm surprised Maud hired a kinky guy like you, but I'm not gonna complain."
Male nurses /carers are a thing anon.
If you're in the situation where you need one, you usually cant be too picky.
There's also the possibility that if human maud is anything like her pony counterpart, she only cares if the person is competent.
I was going for RGR Pinkie in OGR human world, and as for Maud hiring a guy, I just figure she's a really good judge of character, which is why she was the first to become suspicious of Pinkie's original caretakers.
>"My sister just came from a mental assylum where the staff was wantonly abusing the patients. Guess i'll just let the first male nurse I come across take care of her!"
>I just figure she's a really good judge of character
As someone who works in the caregiving business, I can confirm that good help is HARD to find. It's 10,000x easier to just say "fuck it, going with the same sex so there's not temptation" than to go with a guy caregiver for a female patient.
Most of the guys I work alongside... trust me, you wouldn't want to risk these guys in a "alone in a residence with a young and attractive catatonic woman" situation.
Leave that sort of thing to the heavily populated public medical facilities with paid guards, surveillance systems, recordings, etc.

If it were a female nurse and a male patient, i'd be significantly less concerned.
Only in RGR would I trust a straight male nurse with a female patient all alone for hours each day with no one else in the entire building (even if there were a surveillance system).
>first male
>there is no possible way what Maud did research for the staff

Literal brainlet.
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Have you thought about the possibility that whoever you work for just has low standards?
>going with the same sex so there's not temptation
The fuck kind of planet do you live on that doesnt have gays or lesbians.
>If it were a female nurse and a male patient, i'd be significantly less concerned.
Oh i see, you're just retarded.
Maybe Anon is a cousin, or was a known entity to the family before he was hired (son of a neighbor, classmate of Maud's at college, or something)
>"hurr durr, do research"
First off, caregivers of that quality are NEVER available right when you need them. Second, you're about as likely to be able to poach a good one from his job as you are to win the lottery without buying a ticket.
>Have you thought about the possibility that whoever you work for just has low standards?
I've talked with a considerable number of people who've done this work across the continental US and a few overseas. The rates are pretty consistent. If you want a male caregiver who's been vetted as trustworthy while unobserved, you're looking at low-end single-digit percentages here in the BEST of circumstances.
>The fuck kind of planet do you live on that doesnt have gays or lesbians.
Lesbians with an attractive female patient, as a rule of thumb, are also a no-no. And as for gays, the percent of the human population that's gay is about 2.5%, and care work of this sort is usually at some point or another... messy. Long story short, most gay guys who DO go into this line of work steer FAR away from caring for those who can't dress themselves consistently.
>Oh i see, you're just retarded.
The numbers don't lie. The only one who's retarded is anyone who'd buy "oh, Maud just got lucky or is a good judge of character and found the 1 reliable, unemployed, iron-willed straight male willing to do work for a live-in healthcare and patient monitoring (in her disassociative state, live-in 24 hour on-call services would be mandatory).

When you work your way up from ground-level to management for caregiver work, you start to realize how utterly blind everyone is to what kind of people sign up for this line of work.
I'd say there's about 0.01% who do it because it's who they are, and the other 99.99% are all there for concerning reasons. Things like: It makes them feel powerful. They want to do something sexual/inappropriate with a patient. They want access to medical supplies and this is one of the easier ways to get it.
>work for a live-in healthcare and patient monitoring (in her disassociative state, live-in 24 hour on-call services would be mandatory) *case*.
At the end of the day, it's neither feasible, nor a worthwhile endeavor. Go with a female who's in a relationship (with a guy) to mitigate risk, and move on.
If this were RGR, a male CG with a female patient wouldn't be a huge risk. It'd still be less ideal, but not enough to warrant concern.
>Anon wants to argue with her, but frankly, he's not even sure about the logic he's arguing against.
>She thinks white ankle socks are kinky?
>Eventually he just reminds himself that he is technically talking to a crazy person right now, and that debating with her on something inconsequential isn't on his priority list.
>No, making sure she doesn't hurt herself is, which is what he's doing when he jolts forward to catch the girl as she flails to regain her balance after failing to put her underwear on.
>She's managed to tie her ankles together with the bit of fabric and is on a head-first collision course with the edge of the bed frame before Anon manages to wrap his arms around her and divert their path.
>Thinking quick, Anon twists their body right before bouncing off of the mattress, making sure not to land on her while his arms protect her head.
>Once they come to a complete stop Anon quickly pushes away, the two on their sides, and looks her over.
"You okay?" he asks frantically. hand coming up to push her hair from her face and check for any bumps or bruises.
>She stares at him with big, blue eyes for a long moment, then gulps and nods her head minutely.
>Anon releases a heaving breath.
"Good. I don't know what I'd tell your sisters if they showed up with you concussed or with a broken bone.
>He sits up, hands on his knees as Pinkie follows suit.
>The underwear are still twisted up around her ankles as they dangle over the side of the bed, and Anon stands to fix that.
>She's silent as he tugs them off, unravels them, and then slides them back onto her pale legs.
>Pushing them up to her knees, that's as far as he's comfortable, and he looks up to meet her eyes.
"Um, you think you can pull them up the rest of the way?" he asks awkwardly.
"Uh, y-yeah, easy-peasy," she answers, reaching down to pull the underwear on.
>Dressed as much as he'd get her, Anon rubs the back of his neck and thinks.
"Still have about forty minutes before your sisters show up."
>Waa waa waa, my green horsewords on Tibetan basket-weaving blog are unrealistic
What are you even doing here?
Can confirm. My best friend is in the medical field, as is a lot of his family. The amount of people who go in for altruistic reasons is depressingly low. People go into medicine mostly for money (and you have to be really good to make good money) or power over people. He deals with constant wanton negligence and petty bullshit. And he works in one of the best wards in his hospital.
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It's a fictional story and maud DID just get that lucky for the sake of the plot or already knew a guy that was a caregiver >>33510519 and trusts him not to do anything inappropriate.
I realise the medical industry is shit IRL but suspend your disbelief a little.
>The only one who's retarded is anyone who'd buy "oh, Maud just got lucky or is a good judge of character and found the 1 reliable, unemployed, iron-willed straight male willing to do work for a live-in healthcare and patient monitoring (in her disassociative state, live-in 24 hour on-call services would be mandatory).
I'd say this guy makes the better point >>33510536.
It might not be feasible, but that does not mean impossible, and for the sake of the story, that's good enough.
Maud really just got that lucky. If someone in a work of fiction won the world's largest lottery, you wouldn't say that's unrealistic, would you? It can happen for real, after all, even if the odds are astronomical, and is that not a staple of realistic fictions? Why write about the mundane, likely things that happen in day to day life? Those things are rarely entertaining. No, it's better to right about the bizarre and unlikely, but still possible scenarios people can find themselves in.
Like love stories in general.
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>Like love stories in general.
Goddammit Anon stop reminding me!
Pinkie>Twiggles>Applejack>Butterhush>>>(gap greater than the known universe)>>>FashionFaker>BlueSlaver

Fite me irl.
Rarity is in cannon explicitly faking, faking a repulsive attitude to boot,
and BlueSlaver would be insufferable with her ego alone, if not being the only one to sin that hard against her element
>tfw when arguments over whether the premise of a green is realistic or not overshadow the green itself.
No matter how bad you might perceive any of them, you still have to give it to even Rarity and Rainbow Dash; when the chips are down and ponies are in danger, they're willing to put themselves on the front lines to save the day.
That's admirable and at least worthy of some respect. Doesn't mean you have to want to date them, but come on, they aren't complete shits.
> Faking a personality with a repulsive attitude
> Rarity tries to be proper, knowledgeable in her field, sociable with others, and while she courts high society, she is also very charitable to the less fortunate
> Repulsive
Anon, not only are you infected with the gay, but you are also a dirty communist who hates classy mares with hearts of gold.
The real reason Sunset wanted to get out of Equestria is because she thought herding was stupid.
To be fair all three of them were at fault there.
Dash for not paying attention to what she was agreeing to.
Fluttershy for actually agreeing to it.
The bitch who wanted a goddamn slave.
>being so selfish as to hog a guy all to herself
no wonder she got kicked out
thank god she didn't become a princess, who knows what would have happened with her at the head
neat. thanks for writing this, anon. will you write more?
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The solution is obviously to strip down and join her in there. No straight mare would complain about a nice colt sitting her on his lap and rubbing her all over.

>That one mare friend of yours will never realize her mistake only after she invites you to the local bath-house/spa/place where you'll both be naked and in the water
"Want me to shampoo your mane?"
>Potential waifu is now desperately trying not to wink in his lap
>"Oh Celestia, he'll think I'm some creepy pervert and he'll never want to hang out ever again!"
Don't argue with autism, Anon. He can't help being wrong.
"Stop you have violated the law."
>Guardsmares shout at you as you pull your throbbing, erect cock out of the ruined anus of a mare.
>"Oh, so that's her name, The Law."
>Angrily screams 'I am the law' during sex
>Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie
>Pinkie Pie fell in love with you the moment you provided her with A) the concept of peanut butter, and B) a recipe for peanut butter cookies
>Rainbow Dash became enthralled with your world after you told her about jets and air shows, and her insistent discussions about them eventually drifted to other, more personal topics.
>You would meet her every other night after work to talk to her about the wonders of fast-moving things in your world, but soon Rainbow Dash became curious about the human who came from that world.
>You started talking about your life, which lead to you asking about her own.
>The place you'd meet up changed from the bar, to your house.
>A table with cider, to a comfy couch under a warm blanket.
>The realization that she loved you hit her like a freight train one night while the two of you were cuddling under a blanket and talking about nothing
>Twilight saw you as a test subject at first
>A creature from another world who knew all sorts of fascinating things - or at least knew OF any fascinating things
>She wanted to know everything, so you held meetings every week, but sometimes more frequent
>It wasn't until her third meeting with you that it occurred to her to offer tea or coffee to drink
>It wasn't until the fifth meeting that you decided to bring a snack with you for the two of you to munch on
>It wasn't until the seventh meeting that she sent you a message and requested that you go to a local restaurant, since Spike was having a few friends over that night and Twilight didn't want to disturb him
>By the time Twilight realized that she hadn't brought her notebook to write things down or that the questions had shifted from "what is the function of a 'rubber duck'" to "so how are you today", it was too late
>As socially awkward as she was, it took her time to find an answer to the question, "why do I look forward to our meetings so much?"
>Cadence was convinced from the start that Twi was going on dates
You don't fall in love with recipes or stories.
The fluff in that pic is great and I'd love to see an angle where Cadence pushes the lost and confused human into a herd that has a growing interest in him. We don't have nearly enough stories of her playing matchmaker.
>You don't fall in love with recipes or stories.

>but soon Rainbow Dash became curious about the human who came from that world.
>You started talking about your life, which lead to you asking about her own.

>By the time Twilight realized that she hadn't brought her notebook to write things down or that the questions had shifted from "what is the function of a 'rubber duck'" to "so how are you today", it was too late

Correct. The stories lead to actual conversations between Anon and Twilight/Rainbow.
>>The realization that she loved you hit her like a freight train one night while the two of you were cuddling under a blanket and talking about nothing
I imagine RD all cozy and cuddling, while suddenly her eyes snap wide open in panic when she realizes that.

That's what I picked up on and what I assumed knowing Maud's practicality.

This is also likely. I could see Maud picking someone she knows and trusts.


I know it might give me a sad feel later but I'm really liking the story so far. Ignore the doubter and keep going. I look forward to the next update.
>tries to be proper,
Snooty, and pretentious is a garbage attitude
Her hick folks that she is embarrassed by are better ponies without being "proper"
>We don't have nearly enough stories of her playing matchmaker.
I choose to think every 'coincidence' or sudden burst of inspiration that leads to something romantic happening in a green is because Cadence is hidden nearby doing her thing.
Mostly because the mental image of her crouching in some bushes chanting "KissKissKissCome on hurry up already mamma wants a new ship on the wall." under her breath is highly amusing.
This is cute as fuck, my dude.
>"Fatherbucker, I have 20 bits riding on this! Just kiss!"
>Meanwhile, Anon and his waifus are uncomfortably aware that Cadence is hiding in either a real bush or behind a fake cardboard bush that has two big obvious eye-holes in it
>They can even see her tail poking out, swishing like a cat's tail in excitement
> Has standards and good taste
> Cares about personal cleanliness
I can see why you resent Rarity so much.
>Cadance is a voyeur, but due to ponies lack of perception Anon is the only one who notices
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>Waifu Celestia and Luna
>Get them pregnant
>They give birth
>"Mister Anonymous? You can see your foals now."
>Walk into the room the princesses are resting in
>The beds are empty except for the foals, who are asleep and resting against the pillows
>Anon is now a single father
>It's actually an old tradition to let the stallion have a private moment with his new foals to help facilitate the parental bond.
>Anon gently picks them up and cradles them in his hands close to his chest, simply staring at how small they are.
>One nuzzles his palm and the other gently takes his thumb in it's mouth, both still sound asleep.
Nice straw man
Nothing to do with dirt
>Anon, for once, actually does succumb to coltish whimsy in his emotional state, and believes that they actually did run off on him
>of course, they come back just in from the horse-bathroom just a few seconds later before he can do or say anything he'd regret, but the damage has been done
>he'll always remember those few terrible moments when his life stretched before his eyes, visions of trying (and possibly failing) to raise his children alone
>after that night, he always makes sure to hold his wives extra close at night
Now y'all made me think of the scene in "Single Dadnon" where Celly and Venus are stalking Anon and Luna on their date.

Spoilered because I'm sure there's a ton of newfags who don't know the story since it's posting.

>inb4 link pls
"Single Dadnon" by Shukaku

It's one of my all time favorite of mine so go, read, now.

>>One nuzzles his palm and the other gently takes his thumb in it's mouth, both still sound asleep.

>imply not already holdin' 'em close.

gods damnit, that's what I get for trying to edit in the reply box like a faggot.
third time's the charm eh anon?
>It's one of my all time favorite of mine so go, read, now.
And I still fucked up what I was originally trying to fix. I'm going to go shoot myself now.
Put your shit into a notepad and edit it first.
That's why I'm such a faggity faggot right now. I DID put the last one in notepad++ and I STILL missed my typo.
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>tfw would be fine with just Celestia, let alone both Celestia and Luna
>>inb4 link pls
>"Single Dadnon" by Shukaku
Shukaku's best story, IMO
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>ywn hold your fuzzy little bundle of joy.
>ywn hold your fuzzy slightly bigger bundle of joy who helped you make the former.
I scream into the void, my only answer is silence.
Maybe if i keep screaming, my echo will return.
So that at the very least, i can play pretend.
new thread
fuck you gently
Humans are constantly running perception checks.
Fucking kill yourself already.
We ain't dead yet skeletal or ghost
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why spam to reach the bump limit? are you that desperate?
Why not?
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>Light Novels
>not Web Novels
>Magician Anon, whose "great and terrible powers" are hidden by Twilight due to a great misunderstanding that Anon hasn't caught on to yet, has been challenged by Trixie to a Magic Off!
>The look of horror on Twilight's face was priceless as she realized the blue madmare found out about Anon being a 'Magician'.
>To Twilight and her fellow Princesses, Anon was a magical -god- who had no better.
>Trixie acted as if he was a mere beginner that was just learning where to pull a rabbit from.
>Thankfully, when Anon surprisingly and -excitably- agreed, Twilight was able to convince the poor fool to do this showdown in the Canterlot Gardens with her and the other Princesses as Judges.
>Trixie, who foolishly believed this to be some sort of praise of her power to be judged by all the Princesses themselves, would proudly declare, "I, the Great and Powerful Trixie shall go first!"
>And with a great bout of magic and finesse, the show mare would make handkerchiefs fly out of a vase before she made them all bundle up and, with a flash, showed off a lovely bouquet of flowers.
>It was..slightly different than her normal routine, definitely surprising how it appeared it all came out of nowhere. This trick gets polite applause and respectful nods.
>Trixie did indeed get a little better as a magician and even had the mind NOT to set off fire works in the garden.
>After a moment, the princesses would look to Anon expectantly, almost fearfully...
>The Human was just all smiles as he presented a very simple box.
"Trixie, for this trick I would be -honored- if you assisted me. I, uh, l don't exactly have a lovely assistant with me at the moment...
>"Hah, can't even do your own magic tricks, hm? Well, the Great and Powerful Trixie will humor you for now and allow you to make a fool of yourself. What shall the Ever Merciful and Graceful Trixie do?"
"Oh, it's very simple.."
>The smile the human sported sent shivers down the princesses back as Trixie seemed nonplussed to the whole thing..
>>he'll always remember those few terrible moments when his life stretched before his eyes, visions of trying (and possibly failing) to raise his children alone
>"Anon, honey, I had to take a piss. I'm SORRY."
>Trixie was still oh so confident and kept up her large smile, so sure she was going to win if all Anon had was a little box...
>That all changes when Anon began pulling swords out from the box.
>All smiles are gone...
>For a moment, she thought Anon was going to draw on upon her. What he says next almost makes her wish he did.
"Now, this is very simple: when I enter this box and say 'go', you just slide the swords into box, OK?"
>To all ponies here, Anon was essentially asking to die.
>-Telling- his opponent to kill him, perhaps in shame.
>But the princesses knew better to think such things.
>Something Great and Terrible was going to happen and Trixie was going to bear witness. May the gods spare her.
>"T-the Great and Powerful Trixie thinks..this might be dangerous!"
>Anon just gives her a dismissive wave and smiles wide.
"I had to pull out my best for you! You'll love it!"
>With nothing else said, the human would clamber into the box, his instructions repeated to the shaking Showmare as she took the swords into her magic.
"OK...ready annnnd...GO"
>In what surely felt like slow motion, Trixie would hesitantly slide the swords into where they were meant to go, tears streaking her face before a horrible scream pierced the heavens.
>The human, surely turned to swiss, gave the howl before all became quiet.
>Trixie was in a panic, looking between the Princesses and the Box as she stammered, "H-HE TOLD TRIXIE TO DO IT AND YOU DIDN'T STOP IT! TRIXIE THOUGHT...I THOUGHT HE HAD A PLAN."
>As the Princesses sat in a stunned, horrified silence, Trixie would begin pulling the swords out of the box in a wild panic before the top suddenly came up.
>There, totally unharmed, was the human, smiling brightly like it was any other day as he stared down to the baffled Trixie and his slack jawed audience.
"How'd I do?"
>A month later, Trixie's still in therapy
>The Princesses are more convinced than ever that the death defying human is a being of great power
What about pinkie? I like her but I doubt she'd fall in love over something so trivial.

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