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Christmas Comes Early Edition

"I May Have Let You Slide And Allowed You To Have Thanksgiving At Your Little Marefriend's House, But Your Flank WILL Be Home For" Hearth's Warming Sub-Edition

Old Stocking Stuffers: https://pastebin.com/XtAKzbfq
>>
>I do so love watching my dear boy put up the lights
>>
>Sunshine, were you by chance visited by the ghost of Christmas pastl year?
Perhaps mother, why?
>And while she was here were you to...intimate?
I don’t see why that has any bearing mother.
>Well, it’s just that she’s been standing in the living room for the past two days whispering incoherently about you and refuses to leave.
Ba humbug!
>>
>>33241639
>ywn impress mom & auntie by doing regular tasks around the house
>"Mmm, my handsome boy..you'd be quite the house husband if mommy had any intentions of letting you date~"
>>
>>33242033
Next you’ll tell me she makes him walk around in nothing but an apron and jock strap
>>
>>33242213
>"Ah, n-nephew! Forgive our clumsiness..would you be so kind as to retrieve our silverware once more?"
>'Auntie, stop dropping your fork on purpose.'
>"..Stop having such a cute bottom then. Tease."
>>
>Sweetie, can you do your funny dance for our guests.
Mom please we’re at the Winter’s Ball. I dont want people seeing me do that.
>You don’t want to make your mommy sad do you?
Mom there are literally ambassadors here! What would they say if they saw the prince making an ass of himself?
>*sniff* I suppose all sons must hurt their mothers eventually. I guess now is my turn. I thought I’d at least have few years left.
Oh my god FINE
>>
>>33242229
T-That's not funny if it's true
>Remember my mom always telling me to do the 'mc hammer' dance
>Basically just a siezure impression while saying 'can't touch this'
Alright nevermind, it was kind of funny
>>
>>33241661
You can’t get ghost pregnant right? Right?
>>
Embarrassing mom stories? I got one

I remember one Christmas my parents took me to the Poconos. I remember this big white building I don’t Remember what it was called though. Anyways inside this building were restaurants ,kids play area’s pool halls,Anyways one of the restaurants had a karaoke’s spot and my mother made me get up in front of a restaurant full of people it’s saying “and I will always love you “by Whitney Houston I don’t remember what the exact song name was. All I remember was that at some point a lady ran up stuffed a $10 bill in my pocket.I still cringed when I think about it
>>
>>33242258
Yeah, I was about 6 when I got up in front of a bunch of people in church and said I wanted to marry my mom.
After telling them I got her a 'purty flower' for mother's day.
>>
>Mom is literally God
>Anonymous is her son the morning star
>The first sunrise; the first day was made just for him
>He is the first being to receive her love
>But isn't the only one, as she soon creates her human/pony antfarm, causing her son to grow jealous
In the month's time we had off from this thread, I wanted to come up with atleast something
>>
I wanna see Celestia wear the Super Crown
>>
>>33241639
God they’re such sluts. Aunt Luna is the only one with any modesty
>>
She had to make do with Twilight when there was no Anon around.

Off to a "good" start I see.
Will this thread get tolerable again when pic limit is reached, like last time?
>>
Test
>>
I need a new /mom/ and auntie snuggle story If anyone could whip that out.
>>
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>>33242454
>"Ha ha! We hath donned our bathing gown and are ready for fun and or sun!"
>"..Sister, are those strings supposed to constitute a bathing suit?"
>"How sinful! It's enough you'll be stealing away my Nephew so that he may slather tanning lotion upon your prodigious backside, but you must also steal his loving gaze from our modest visage?!"
>>
>>33242560
Let's see...
Nope. My to-write list is chock full. I'm completely booked.
Well, there is that one tiny slot towards the end of next week. Tho even that is tentatively scheduled for something else.
Sorry!
>>
>>33242560
>>33242618
You're in my spot, sperg
Out
>>
>>33242335
There'd be heads rolling if I had to share /mom/
>>
>>33242669
Mine worked at the daycare center I attended. It made me very jealous to see other kids hug her.
>>
>>33242566
I’m sorry but Luna’s outfit is more attractive to me. It leaves way more to the imagination
>>
>>33242799
>"Zounds! If I am not careful I may inadvertently end up showing one of the many pairs of underpants and leggings I'm wearing!"
>"It would be fuel for the tabloids! 'Debauched Princess flashes chaste Nephew her ankles!'."
>>
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>Celestia is a single mother trying to get back into the dating scene
>she's mostly doing it for anon, after all, he needs a good strong father figure that he can look up to
>lil anon disagrees, he likes things the way they are
>just him, mommy, and auntie
>he doesn't need or want a daddy, some strange man coming into his home and stealing his mommy away from him
>anon proceeds to drive away every single man Celestia brings home by being as much a creepy little hell child as he can whenever her back is turned
>saying really creepy cryptic shit, like repeating numbers that turn out to be future dates, in a really disturbing monotone voice
>dismembering his toys and leaving them in strange positions that resemble some kind of satanic blood ritual
>drawing disturbing pictures featuring Celestia's boyfriends meeting really grizzly ends
>singing macabre songs in his cutesy little child voice
>every boyfriend bugs out cuz no MILF pussy is worth this shit
>Celestia cries and cuddles anon, and for a few weeks things are back to normal
>until Celestia decides to give another go
>>
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>>33243260
>"Howdy do, Neighbor! Names Discord! Just thought I'd stop by and bring you this Quiche!"
>Anon's deadpan stare goes from him to the dish
>"Funny, they call it a 'housewarming', but I am definitely picking up a chill from yo-"
>SLAM
>"Alright, good talk!..Tell your mother I said hi~"
>The door opens back up with surprising quickness
>'-Fuck you just say about my mom, dude?'
>>
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>>33242880
I need Victorian Era Luna in my life
>>
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>>33243307
>>
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>>33242448
>>
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>>33243606
>>
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>March yourself back upstairs and cut that hair mister. I raised a prince, not a whore.
>>
>>33243606
She's already the biggest horse, and in ayy land she's pushing at least 6'1.
How would that crown change anything?
and don't say I have to check the enclosed instruction booklet or search the hotel
>>
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> Ah! Anon finally! After all this time!!
Hey mom have you seen my-- JESUS CHRIST TWILIGHT THATS MY XBOX CONTROLLER!!!!!!
>>
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>Have you come to praise the sun.My son?
>>
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>>33243689
Something like that. I actually came to make a deposit.
>>33243668
Fuckin A', those controllers are built like shit to begin with, too, that's how microsoft gets ya!
>>
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Girls be on statues of Prince Anon like
>>
>>33243740
>"..Mom, don't."
>'Oh stooop..it's a little funny.'
>"No, no it's not."
>'..It can't be helped, after all, you're hard as a rock~'
>"Ahaha..there it is."
>>
So what would I gain by joining the moon side Aunt Luna?
>Power......UNLIMITED POWER!!!!!!
>>
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>>33243779
Mom, Auntie, c'mon let's not make this a contest you know I don't like having to choose
>>
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The principal's son's annual end of the school year car wash fund raisers always leaves the school with a surplus of cash.

Celestia couldn't be happier
>>
Every now and then the Prince must punish naughty mares in the only way he knows how
>>
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>I thought I told that boy no shenanigans while I was out
>>
>>33243829
>>33243845
I've missed /mom/ too but damn slow down
>>
>You shift in place from side to side, trying to keep your feet from hurting so much.
>You have been staning in line for a very very long time.
>But it has all been worth it, because your're finally at the front of the line.
>Now you just need to wait your turn until you can see him.
>From what you've been told, he can do almost anything.
>Maybe he would be able to help you.
>"Next."
>You smile and walk up to a woman dressed like... you think they are called elves.
>"Are you here by yourself?"
>She looks behind you like she's trying to find something.
"Yes ma'am, I am."
>She seems to sigh and points to her right.
>An older man dressed all in red with a white beard waves at you.
>Santa Claus!
>"Alright then, you can go sit on Sanat's lap."
>You smile and start walking towards him.
>"Ho ho ho, and how are you doing today son?"
>You gulp and try to keep yourself composed like Mommy taught you to.
"I'm good Mr. Claus, sir. And yourslef?"
>He looks rather surprised at your response.
>"Well well well, you are a very polite young man aren't you. Seems like someone is definetly going to be on my nice list. Now come sit on my lap and tell me what you want for Christmas."
>You smile even brighter than before and nod, walking up to him.
>"Now son, what's your name?"
"My name is Anon, Mr. Claus sir."
>"Oh please, just call me Santa."
>He says with a laugh.
"Alright, Santa."
>"Now then, what would you like for Christmas Anon?"
"Well Santa, I'm not sure if you can do this or not. I've tried everything here but no one seems to be able to help me. But from what everpo- I mean, everyone here has told me, you can do pretty much anything."
>He loks nervious right now for some reason.
>"Well... uhm... I can do many things others can't. What is it exactly you had in mind?"
"Can you please take me home?"
>"I- ah... sorry, but are you lost?"
>He looks at the woman who brought you to him and she shrugs.
"Yes Santa, I am lost. I'm far from home and I would very much like to get back."
>>
>>33243886
>He looks shocked.
>"Son... where is your mommy or daddy?"
"My Mommy is back home in Canterlot, that's where I want to go back to. And I don't have a daddy, but I do have an Auntie."
>"Canterlot?"
>He says sounding surprised.
"Yes sir, it's in Equestria."
>"Equestria? Well, where are you living now?"
"I live in an orphanage sir. I'm very far from my home and no one knows how to get me back. You're the only person here with magic, you're the only person I can think of that might be able to help me"
>His eyes move from side to side.
>"Uhm, Anon... that's a bretty big..."
"I don't care if I don't get any other presents. Please... I just want to go home."
>You look up at him with hope in your eyes.
>"I-I'll see what I can do. But that might be too much, even for Santa Claus."
>You deflate a little at his answer, even though you half expected him to say no.
"Thank you anyway sir, I would appreciate anything you could do. But, if you can't do that for me..."
>You reach into your coat and take out an envelope and hand it to him.
"Could you please give this to my Mommy for me instead? I just want her to know I'm alright. She's probably worried about me."
>He looks unsure but takes your letter and examines the writing on the envelope.
>He's probably used to kids writing English and not Equish.
>"Uh hey kid, why don't you take a candy cane and go stand with my elf for a while and I'll see what I can do with this letter."
>You nod and get up from his lap to grab a candy cane.
>You noticed the woman from earlier go over to Santa.
>"Something's wrong with that kid, I don't know what but we better call the cops to pick him up and look into it."
>You over hear Santa whisperer to her.
>So him too...
>Looks like no one can or will help you.
>You take a candy cane and walk away before they can make you stay.
>"Hey kid wait!"
>You hear the woman call to you, but you continue walking.
>>
>>33243899
>You think she's trying to follow you, but you manage to weave between other people easier than her and you leave the mall without being stopped.
>It's only a few minutes to the bus stop, hopefully you won't need to wait long for the bus to arrive.
>Even though you doubt you'll be missed, you don't want to stay away from the orphanage longer than you need to be.
>Luckily the bus doesn't take too long to arrive.
>Really would be nice if you had a watch to help you know what time it is.
>The door opens and you see it's the same driver that dropped you off earlier.
>"Well hey there sonny. Didn't think I'd see you again tonight. Hope on board."
>You get in and start going through your pockets for coins.
>"Ah forget it, it's almost Christmas. Besides, bus is empty anyway. This ride is on me."
"Thank you sir!"
>You say smiling.
>"You're welcome young man."
>You decide to sit down close to the front of the bus so you can get off easier.
>Once you're seated, the bus starts to move.
>"So did you tell Santa what you wanted for Christmas yet?"
>The old driver calls from the front.
"Yes sir, but I don't think he can give it to me."
>"Why not? Were you naughty?"
"I don't think so sir. But other kids pick on me a lot, so maybe I have been and don't know it."
>"I don't think that's the case. Why don't you think he'll give you what you want?"
>He asks with concern in his voice.
"Because I wanted to go home to be with my family."
>There is a pause after you tell him that, and all you can hear is the bus driving differen the road.
>"If I'm not mistaken, there's an orphanage not far from one of the stops on this route... that wouldn't happen to be your stop would it?"
"Yes sir, it is."
>Another long pause hangs in the air.
>"I'm sorry son... I know you might not believe me, but it does get better."
"What do you mean?"
>>
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>>33243886
>>33243899
oh jesus fuck he's here to make me feel
>>
>>33243907
>"I grew up without parents for a while too and had to stay at an orphanage myself. And believe me, things do get better. Maybe not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but someday it will get better."
"Thank you."
>You respond not really knowing what else to say.
>The rest of the ride is spent in silence until your stop.
>You pull the cord near the window, making a singing noise, and the bus pulls over to the curb.
>The driver watches as you leave.
>"Hey kid, hang in there. Things'll get better someday."
>He says as you exit.
"Thank you sir."
>"Merry Christmas."
>He says with a smile and a wave before the doors close.
>The bus drives off, leaving you alone.
"Happy Hearthswarming..."
>Better get going.
>As you are walking, you try to remember all the good times Mommy, Auntie Luna, Cousin Cadance, and yourself had during the holidays.
>How mommy made your Hearthswarming doll and put it with hers and Auntie's above the fire place.
>How you got to open the first present because you were the youngest.
>You wonder how they're doing back home.
>It's been over half a year since you ended up here.
>Lost in thought you found yourself outside the orphanage.
>You walk along outside until you find the window leading to your shared room.
>Carefully, you open the window and climb in.
>Your roommate isn't in yet.
>All the adults and kids think you stay in your room most of the time anyway so it is easier to just leave through the window than listen to the other children mock you as you walk the halls.
>You take your hat, coat, and shoes off and place them at the foot of your bed.
>Your stomach starts to rumble, signaling you should get dinner.
>Based on the time on your clock, everyone should still be eating.
>It would probably be best to wait a little longer before going to get something yourself.
>So you sit on your bed and wait.
>Might as well listen to the radio.
>You don't have much here, but the clock next to your bed does have a radio.
>>
>>33243923
>You don't have much here, but the clock next to your bed does have a radio.
>You turn it on and just like everyday for the last month, there is Christmas music on.
https://youtu.be/dL71eMc1blw
"I'll be home for Christmas..."
>The words hit you hard and you start to get that all too familiar feeling.
>You've lost count since you came here because of how many times it's happened.
>You close you eyes, bring your knees up against your chest and bury your face in your crossed arms and start to cry.
"If only in my... dreams..."

Just in case anyone was wondering what Anon went through his first Christmas and or Hearthswarming away from home.

Sorry if the writing isn't to my normal stuff, I haven't written in a while.
>>
>>33243932
It hurts a little, but don't be a stranger, man.
>>
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Keep that hair short mom
>>
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>>33243960
Nah, you're not putting any dykey fades on my mom
>>
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>>
>>33243997
kek
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ38g4X7WE4
>>
>>33243713
>"That's wonderful, my child! Why don't you follow Sister Sunset and let her show you where you can leave your Sunlight Medals as an offerin- WHY ARE YOU RIPPING OFF YOUR PANTS, YOUNG MAN!?"
>>
>"...Yeah..who's my pretty girl, huh?"
>"Yes. Yep, it's you..atta' girl..*mwahmwahmwah*
>Sun Sun climbs into Anon's lap
>"You know Ma's jealous of how I spoil you, right?"
>"Says I oughta' direct some of this lovin' her way..but you wouldn't like that, would you?"
>Sun Sun's tuft puffs out a little as her wings settle
>"Ehh now, don't go thinkin' of whackin' her..big,cake lovin' mook."
>Mom watches from the doorway, scowling
>'..You breaka' my heart, Sun Sun.'
>>
Bro I am fucking not feeling good and I could really go for some mom & aunt gentle care and cuddles
I want to rest on their flanks and have them regale me with stories of when I was little.

Night, mom, auntie
>>
>>33244484
Oh can someone please momlestia edit this?
>>
>>33243583
> Unlike YOU sister I don’t need to “show the goods” as you put it to catch my dear nephew eye. When he sees how modest and reserved my attire is he’ll go mad with curiosity and lust. His own mind will do all the work while my assets remain hidden away from those that are unworthy
>>
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>>33245863
In a world were tan skin and revealing clothing gets you all the lads. Luna sticking to her old traditions, refuses to let anyone see bare skin outside of is considered ok to her. Expect for the handsome stranger that continues to steal into her bedchambers
>>
>>33243932
I'm happy because there's something to read, but sad because of what that something is about.
The cure to rusty writing, is writing. Balance the sad with comf.
>>
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>So THAT'S where my sweet boy's G-spot is?
>>
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Mom you're sick. The kingdom can handle a few days without you. Don't worry. Between Aunt Luna we should be able to handle your duties just fine.
>But the ambassadors from the far Saddle Arneighbia are coming! I ha--
MOTHER RELAX, The ambassador loves me. I sure she'll be fine with me stepping in for you
>But but but
Mom if I catch you out of bed I promise you wont get ANY of the cakes the ambassador is bringing.
>*whine*
>>
>>33246125
How would Anon run his mother’s kingdom while she’s sick?
>>
>>33245883
mom's tanlines though
>>33246112
oh shit she found out i'm ticklish as fuck?
>>
>>33245863
>>33245883
I'm ok with this
>>
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>>33246125
>>33246207
>"P-Per the Young Master's orders, nopony is to ply, share, sell, or otherwise give you cake, under penalty of time-out."
>'Preposterous! *WHAARGARBL*'
>'I'm a grown mare- *CHOMP* and I'm QUITE capable of practicing- *RAWWWR* restraint, thank you very much!'
>"..Your Highness, in the span of these few sentences you've managed to literally inhale 40 cakes."
>'ThatwasmylastoneIswear.'
>"Prince Anonymous says that's as many as FOUR tens.."
>>
>>33246356
>And that's terrible.
>>
>>33243779
>"A force choke here or there does wonders for staff discipline, Auntie."
>'Does it now?'
>"It does. They no longer refer to my master as 'Emperor Pounds-of-Cake.'"
>>
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>Sweetie watch out for that parasprite!
MOM WAI-
>>
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>>33246957
>"Anonymous, hold still...there's a bee right...there."
>'MOM.'
>>
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>I'm sorry Anon. Queen's orders.
>>
>>33247116
>Anon boops derp horse
>She has a bad case of don't feel good
>"Shhh..close your eyes."
>"Don't let this face be the last thing you see."
>"Heaven may hold it against you."
>>
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>Oh Anon and his jokes.
>>
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>"Anonymous, my sweetheart, did anypony call or come by while I was out?"
>'Hmm? No-, oh wait, yeah, ummm, hold on mama..I wrote it down somewhere..'
>'Uhh, yeah, some girl named Sum Yun Gai called and said she's stuck in eternal high school or something..'
>'I wasn't really paying attention because she called during a match, oh and this happened like..4 days ago, my bad..love you.'
>"*MMwah* That's quite alright, my sunshine, the important thing is that you remembered and I'm so proud of you."
>'I love you too, mom...you pick up any capri suns while you were out?'
>"Of course..silly boy."
>'Sweet.'
>>
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>embiggens the mom
>goats the mom
YOU GODDAMN SCUMBAAAAAAAAG!!! *CANS.WAV*
>>
>>33247116
>>33247143
But who would make an attempt on the prince’s life
>>
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>>33248748
Since she said 'Queen' I think we can narrow it down to Freddie 'Merks A lot' Mercury or Chrysalis.
Mom has since taken the necessary precautions to teach her son self defense should he be attacked while alone.
>"This is fucking siiiiiiiiick."
>'I thought you might have that reaction, but you've a long way to go before you yourself become a formidable magic user, Anonymous.'
>'Your telekinesis is about on par for a beginner, but your telepathy and telepathic defenses are especially weak.'
>'You'd be easy pickings for even a novice chaos or corruption magic user, as I'll now demonstrate~'
>"Demonstrate? How?-"
>Mom's horn lights up and Anon's body goes rigid as he salutes with one hand and grabs himself with another
>'I'M HER LITTLE TEA POT, SHORT AND STOUT, HERE IS MY HANDLE, HERE IS MY SPOU-, MOM, DAMNIT!'
>"See? I hope this makes you take your lessons with your Aunt and I a bit more seriously."
>"My Princely handsome boy..he has such potential, but he racka' disciprine~"
>"Learn under me, my son."
>'You mean learn from you, right?'
>"I know what I said, Anonymous."
>>
night mom, auntie
>>
>>33245863
if people are able to notice the pregnancy before the child has already arrived she isn't wearing enough clothes
>>
>>33249444
Finally someone said it AND trips confirm
>>
>>33246356
>>33246387
>Anon’s personal guard detail are fillies playing pretend because Celestia think he’s not ready for REAL soldiers. It’s all pleather armor and foam swords and spears. Their medkit consists of 3 juice boxes, a jar of flintsones vitamins, a security blanket,and a full pack of Power Ranger band-aids. When things get serious, for example they encounter *gasp* GIRLS, they bring out the heavy artillery. A Nerf minigun that weighs over 5 klgs with custom cartridges that fire 10000 rounds per minute.
>>
Guard detail consists of 3 Jestas piloted by the best scoring Guards. Because even Mother needs someone to hold off the mooks so she can focus on the big scary one
>>
>>33249859
The big scary one being a sign with “DIET” written in bold black letters that some nefarious terrorist had built in full view of her bedchamber, dining hall, throne room, and study.
>>
>>33249874
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyLIN3bnmiM
Yes, there are captions
>>
Good morning ladies. Mom, I mean the C.E.O what’s me to show you all around the company. After which I will personally show each of you your personal stations where you may begin your tasks Canterlot Industries has hired you for. Except you Twilight, you already know your job.
>Cmon Anon that’s not fair!
Hey! Celestia’s mail isn’t gonna sort itself!


What are the Mane 6’s Job guys?
>>
>Anon has both day and night guards.
>The bat pony night guards were unsure about the prince at first.
>Almost all the other royalty and nobels they were charged to protect were wary of them at best and terrified of them at worst.
>They always did their jobs despite how their charges felt about them.
>But they were pleasantly surprised by their Princess of the Night's nephew.
>He was always civil with them and showed an actual interest in each of them and remembered their names and details they told him.
>The royal sisters and the prince are the three that the night guard look forward to protecting.
>>
>>33243845
Is that fanart of Submission is Mandatory?
>>
>>33250115
Yes
>>
>"Did you know....humans. That, the very first day...can NOT be found among any of your historic tomes?"
>"It was NOT recorded in any part of "your" history."
>"No. The first day was made for ME. By HER."
>"You things-, you..you shitting PEONS."
>"You sicken me beyond reason I AM OF HER AND FROM HER."
>Celestia's son and first angel, Anonymous, delivers his speech to none in particular as he balances perfectly atop the very strings and fabric of reality
>"..I can't wait for you to do yourselves in. Free will was a gift; all life is a gift and you squander it with glee."
>"You live so debauched and without shame that she proclaimed their were 7-, SEVEN things thou shalt not engage in."
>An ear splitting roar breaks his sermon
>That's his horn
>"Oh dear. No doubt Mother will want an explanation for my "harsh words" against her 'creations'."
>He stifles a laugh
>"Yes, humans...even I can be in trouble."
>>
Where the fuck are all my motherfuckers!!!
>>
>>33250787
Sometimes when I'm at work, all I think about is mom /ss/
What do you think would be a good age for her to ask "Anonymous? H-How much do you love mommy?"
>>
>>33250825
The first time she catches him spanking it over Luna’s sleeping ala shinji and asuka
>>
>>33251044
>"Sister why did you scold him and make him stop.."
>"Twas a beautiful dedication from the only male to show interest in us~"
>>
Never a dull moment at the Celestial residence

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN3NaBxVYHs
>>
>>33250045
Pinkie Pie: Head of Marketing / overseer of all company events and Anon’s Bed warmer ( Monday Nights)

Rarity: Head of Mining Operations and Anon’s Bedwarmer ( Tuesday Nights )

Fluttershy: Head of Bio Research and Anon’s Bedwarmer ( Wednesday Nights)

Twilight Sparkle: Mail Clerk and Break Room restocker

Applejack: Head of Production and. Anon’s Bedwarmer ( Thursday Nights )

Rainbow Dash: Head of Security and Anon’s Bedwarmer ( Friday Nights )
>>
>>33251621
>All are under contract to immediately vacate the premises of Anon's bed should the CEO or Vice Chairwoman ask them to
>Except Twilight
>She's actually seasonal help they keep rehiring so her wages never go up
>>
>>33251052
They have a little game they play every morning called l “Find the sticky spot”
>>
>>33252157
use of hands not allowed
>>
>>33251727
>Hey girls! You all ready for the companie’s annual winter getaway?
>Uh actually Twi, I don’t think y’all allowed to go with us.
> what do you mean?! I work here too!
>Darling it’s for employees that worked here continuously for more than one year.
>BUT BUT
> Trust me egghead you wouldn’t enjoy it anyways. It’s all trust exercises this, department evaluations this, Face down ass up on Anon’s bed that.
>WHAT?!
>She means we have to keep Anon’s bed warm continually silly billy!
> You guys even have to do it during the getaway?
> Ummm it’s......we’re all under contract Twilight. It’s not like we enjoy the long, hot, sweaty, nights
>Yea Twi it’s a lot of work you kno? And that Anon never seems to run out of energy.
>For sleeping?
> O-of course darling! He’s a very active sleeper! It’s all I can do to make him stop moving so I can rest.
> Wow girls, I didn’t know you girls had it so bad. Maybe I should right a letter to the BBB?
> ARE YOU LOCO IN THE COCO?! WHY WOULD YOU RUIN A GOOD THING?!
> But Rarity just sa-
> What Pinkie means is its long and hard work but we all satisfied and fulfilled when it’s over.
>Well if you’re all sure.
>>
>>33252278
Congratulations, you've made me want this Anon to get caught and fired out of a cannon into the sun.
>>
>>33252289
>Security Agent Condense, please escort this troublemaker off the premises
I'd get to steppin bruh, she knows peetzer jutsu and kung pao chickun
>>
>>33251621
I see Rarity as Public Relations Officer and Fluttershy as Head of Human (Pony?) Resources. Other than that, you're right on the money. First thing I thought when I saw Rainbow was Worf's method of handling security and I stuck with it.
>>
>>33252278
For fucks sake stop being mean to Twiggles
>>
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>>33252721
It's like the threads longest running meme but yeah she could get cut a break now and then.
Be lying if I said I didn't find her spergy adoration of Anon a little cute.
>>
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>"Higher, mommy! I wanna go higher!"
>'W-WE TOO WISH TO MATCH HEIGHTS WITH OUR NEPHEW, SISTER!'
"Alright, you two, it's not a contest, just have fun."
>'WE SHALL LEAVE IT ALL BEHIND, HA HA!'
>'OUR SUBJECTS SHALL APPEAR AS ANT- THIS IS MUCH TOO HIGH, SISTER, CEASE!'
>>
night /mom/
>>
"Look Anon, that's a friend of mommy's. Velvet?"
>Your old friend turns around, sees you and smiles.
>"Tia? Oh how are you?"
>You feel Anon hide behind your leg because of his shyness like he normally does when meeting new people.
>Looking at Velvet it seems her little one is shy too.
>She buried her head into her mother's neck after Velvet turned around.
"Are you all settled and moved in yet? I didn't want to bother you while you're still unpacking."
>"Oh we're just about unpacked now. Just a few boxes left is all."
>She was a friend of yours for years and you both became teachers together.
>She moved away when her husband got a promotion a few years back but they are back now.
>"And this little one must be Anonymous."
>Looking down you see Anon move his head from behind your leg you look at her.
>"Hi."
>He says before quickly moving back behind you.
>You both giggle.
>"Why hello Anonymous. And this little one is Twilight Sparkle. Can you say 'hello' Twilight."
>Twilight looks briefly at you and Anon before turning back into her mother's neck to hide.
>"Mmm-mmm."
>"Please honey, for mommy?"
>"Mmm-mmm."
>Anon pokes his head out again.
>"Hi Twilight. I'm Anon."
>The little girl looks up again.
>"Hello."
>"Well that was a lot easier than it normally is with her."
"Anon seems to have that effect on people. So, do you have a teaching job lined up yet? I could ask the principal at Canterlot High and see if we could get you in there."
>"Thanks, but I actually have something over at Crystal Prep."
"Crystal Prep, how prestigious. But it isn't that far away. Maybe you would be up for some playdates on the weekends."
>"That would be lovely. Would you like to have Anonymous come over and play with you every once in a while sweetie?"
>"Okay."
"Would you like that too sunshine?"
>"Yes."
"Well I'll let you get back to your shopping. Give me a call when you finish unpacking and we can plan a playdate. Can you say bye Anon?"
>"Bye."
>He waves.
>"Bye-bye."
>Twilight waves back.
>>
>>33254499
cute
>>
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>>33252751
>>33252721
No! shes knows what she did
>>
>>33254499
>>33254701
Had an idea about mom finding her "living" in the CHS library like in the first eqg, and offering to let her stay with her.
>"Anonymous, it's the strangest thing..her transcripts are legit, but she doesn't have an ID, a social, she doesn't even know her own address.."
>'..Yeah she kind of acts weird, too.'
>Twilight is vigorously sniffing Anon and nibbling his neck and ears
>>
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>>33254714
I wanna see what you do with that
>>
>>33254827
I’d love to see an any girl/ Anon edit of that
>>
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>>33242566
Luna is the true patrician's choice indeed
>>
>>33254499
That's that good shit
>>
>>33255521
>"Art thou finding this evening truly euphoric, m'nephew?"
>"Of course, one must have a high IQ in order to appreciate the night.."
>Auntie's neckmane begins to elongate as a pair of hipster glasses comes to rest upon her face
>>
>"Twilight, dear, do you by chance have a change of clothes in your backpack?"
>'..N-No, sorry. I'll just sleep in these if that's fine.'
>"Hmm..I think Luna and myself may be a bit..full figured for any of our clothes to fit you."
>"Anonymous, sunshine?"
"Huh?" Anon calls from his room down the hall
>"Anonymous, is it alright if Twilight borrows a pair of shorts and a shirt to sleep in?"
"Uh I guess yeah, I'm kind of in the middle of a match but she can dig through the drawers or take her chance in the closet."
>Mom smiled
>"His room is the last door on the right, Twilight. Don't be shy."
>'T-Thank you Princes-, Principal Celestia, ma'am..'
>"Celestia' is quite fine, dear. We'll....we'll figure this all out at some point, but for now, our house is your house."
>Mom hugs her gently and ushers her off in the direction of Anon's room
"..Ah you fuckin' bastard..camping ass lil beetch.."
>Twilight knocks lightly before nudging his door open a bit more to poke her head in
>'H-Hi, Anonymous. So, you said the drawers or the closet?'
"Yep."
>'Oh ok I-I'll just..[oh god the smell of a male..]'
"Huh?"
>'Nothing! Heh, guess I'm just being a little picky..m-maybe you want to pick something for me to wear?'
>Anon rolls his eyes as a continue screen comes up
>He stretches at the foot of his bed where he'd been sitting
"Uh, sure."
>Anon rummages through a drawer and pulls out a pair of CHS p.e. shorts and a faded 'Dark Sabbath' t-shirt
"Here you go. It's not Shanel or Buitton but it's what I got."
>'Thank you, Anonymous..'
"Yep, no prob."
>'W-Would it be ok if I stayed and watched you..uh..w-what ARE you doing?'
"..Are video games not a thing at your house?"
>'Stars above, I don't think anywhere in Equus ha-, aahhh haha, I mean, yeah, s-sure!'
>'I..I'm always video games..at my house.'
"K.."
"Well, yeah, sure, I guess. Just don't be like my mom; every 5 seconds 'Anonymous, you missed a guy' 'Sunshine, was that important?' 'Sweetie, let me get the chaotic diamonds.'"
>>
>>33256552
"Or like my Aunt; 'CASUL!', 'YOUR SPEED RUN IS NULL IF THOU ART USING THE WORLD 5-2 CHEAT!'"
>"I-I'm quite alright just watching you~.."
"What?"
>"W-Watching you play that is!"
"Hah..heard you the first time, goof."
>"I didn't mean-..A-Anonymous, w-would you say no if I asked for a hug?"
"..I uh..I don't know what happened Twilight, but I know my mom, my aunt and I are going to try to help you, so..yeah, sure."
>"Thank you.."
>Twilight immediately glomps Anon
"Eaasy there, cowbo-..fuck it."
>Anon hugs her back, hard
"..Mom said you were sleeping in the library on fucking books, jesus."
"D-Don't think I'm..like, trying to get you at a vulnerable point, Twilight, but I can definitely empathiz- are you touching my dick?"
>>
>>33256573
>>
>Good night kiss
>"Sweet dreams, my sunshine"
>>
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>The most rub-able of bellies
>>
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>>33257212
>go to bed around 6 because work at 2 am
>out the door near 2 am and get a text saying don't start til 5
Fucking FUCK, man
>>
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>>33256573
>>are you touching my dick?
Anon should say GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS!
>>
>>33257614
>image search
>10 ALPHA MALE BODY LANGUAGE TRICKS EVERY GUY SHOULD KNOW
I dunno I'd think getting a handy from an interdimensional teenage girl is kind of up there on the alpha scale. Fuckin' Anon though, thinking with his dick "Hmm, this weird homeless girl my mom found in the library is now in my house touching my dick."
"Ha..sick."
>>
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>"..Sister, we do not believe this was the spell's intended effect."
>>
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>>33257783
>"*Ahem* Fear not! Ehh..ye olde' stallions! The replacement sisters are-..have arrived..eth!"
>'Um..yes. W-what she said..'
>>
>>33242241
I don't think so. But God willing, I'll make it happen.
>>
>>33256635
The moment she touched my dick she came and started farting
>>
>>33254499
So how would the friendship games have been if Sci Twi had known Anon and Celestia? What about Midnight?
>>
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mom pls
>>
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>>33259619
Man fuck the Police!
>>
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You got back to time to see what your dad looks like because mom wont talk about him because reasons. Your first step is to find your mom in the past and see who she hooks up with. When you finally track her down you see this.

What do?
>>
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>>33259749
Uh oh I all of a sudden went back even farther in time and now I have to become the legal guardian of horse princesses in girl bodies haha w-woops
>>
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>"Hmmm...well, at least she's only feeding it pizza in her dreams. Just in her dreams, I hope."
>"I wonder what Anonymous is dreaming about right now.."
>>
>>33260378
HARDER MOMMY! HARDER!
>>
>>33260378
>>
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>>33260378
>He's having a dream about taking his mom on a date but he can't stop staring at her lovingly from across the table while trying to start a conversation so he ends up getting more and more desperate to do something(ANYTHING).
>>
>>33260378
Mom!? What're you doing here!?
>>
>>33260378
Mom will learn the hard way just as Luna did that her son has defenses against those snooping around in his dream's, some things are just meant to be private, pic related.
>>
>>33260378
>"I'm really glad I'm getting some quality time with you, but you didn't need to take the whole day off for me."
>"I know you're really busy running the kingdom for the past couple of months."
>"I would have been fine with an hour or two."
>"It would have been enough to have a meal together and just catch up."
>>
>>33260378
Oh Malon, your milk is so much better than moms
>>
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>>33260437
>"..What in the name of Tartarus are those..t-things?"
>>33260787
>"..Note to self: Kill all the knife eared whores everywhere. All of them..and slap Anonymous when he wakes up."
>>
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>>33260787
>>33261117
Hey mom we're out of milk. Is the anymore in storage?
>WHY DONT YOU GO SEE IF THE RED HAIRED BITCH HAS MORE MILK SINCE YOU LOVE IT SO DAMN MUCH!
What the hell?
>>
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>>33260534
Oh Luna when will you learn?
*Proceeds to tickle ponut*
>>
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>>33261176
>"So you were dreamwalking in on me?"
>'YES, I was! What sort of loving mother would I be if I didn't occasionally invade the sanctity of your dreams?'
>"..And that's the only one you saw?"
>'Well, no, there was that ghastly one involving mutant elements of harmony..'
>"Gah..those damn spicy hayfries give me weird dreams."
>'A-And I did see one or two where it was just you and I..'
>"Oh god, you saw the date one?"
>Mom stifles a laugh
>'Anonymous, 'you're so cute you make my pee pee hard' is a perfectly acceptable compliment for your mother, don't be shy.'
>>
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>>33242880
Aunt Luna are those....ANKLE SOCKS?! Show some decency! I can still see the flesh between your ankle and the lining of your dress.
>>
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>>33261209
>>
>>33261212
>"Lecherous Nephew..thou art headed in the right direction for a full fronal flashing of THE OUTERMOST LAYER OF OUR FROCK!"
>Anon's powdered wig flies off comically
>'Mother's Angels & Saints; my virgin eyes!'
>>
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>>33261231
>LAST YEARS DESIGN?!!YOU'RE DEBAUCHED, SCANDALOUS. MY MY FAINT COUCH WHERE'S MY FAINTING COUCH?!!
>>
>>33261270
>"MA! MA, WHERE'S THE FRICKIN' FAINTING COUCH?!"
kek
>>
>Mom is it just me or are the girls in school getting “work” done?
>>
>>33261751
Fish lips & plastic tits do not a beauty make.
>>
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>"M-Mama, no, not my donuts!"
>>
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>>33254838
there u go
>>
>>33241314
Can she just fuck me for x-mas?
>>
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>>33262019
>>
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beep boop
continue y/n
>>
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>"BUMPETH!"
>>
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>>33263833
>>
>>33263846
>"A-Anonymous, sunshine, w-watch this..."
>>
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Mom pls
>>
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>>
>>33261751
>Couldn’t tell you sweetheart
>>
>Hey Anon I got a hot monkey clit! Wanna give me the hot monkey dick?~
>>
>>33265671
I WANT TO TIGHTLY HUG THIS OKAASAN
>>
>>33265674
I think I would rather fuck the pirate standing next to you.
>>
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>>33265671
>Momma's gotta show these sluts how to properly show the goods.
>>
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>>33265971


>>
sons belong to their mothers
>>
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>"IF YOU WISH TO COURT MY SON YOU MUST DEFEAT ME IN SINGLE COMBAT!"
>>
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>>33266000
>trips and tanlines
>>
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>>33266888
>>33266000
>>
Tryin to sleep over here, ma
I'm happy about the new you and stuff but I have to be up early
>>
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wake up wake up wake up
it's the first of the momth
>>
>>33266637
>Yea alright
>>
>>33267342
>"This dead bitch bought a knife to a gun fight."
>>
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>>33267342
>>33267729
>implying mere mortal weapons could do anything to Mom

It appears anon is doomed to be mommy's and auntie's special little man forever
>>
>>33266888
He had a Righteous thought and it sung true to the that of which is. ;)
>>
>>33242241
Google "erma webcomic"
>>
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>>33267761
>"You stand before Celestia; the commandment of motherhood."
>"My son is not a prize to be won. You cannot claim what does not belong to you."
>"Any further attempts will not be met by this type of leniency again. I shall melt you from existence should you persist."
>"Ta~"
>"Anonymous?"
>'Coming.'
>"Ohoh~ Not yet you aren't."
>'Ahaaa..if only I had a bit for everytime I h-'
>"Heard that one I'd have enough to move out'. Ahaha~ My silly boy~"
>>
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>"Anonymous!..."
>"Pardon me, Young Mr. Sandbar?"
>"Would kindly get my son's attention? He's in the 1st row, but he doesn't seem to see me."
>'Uh, P-Princess, I think we're in the middle of a pl-'
>"SUNSHINE! YOO HOO~, MY DARLING LITTLE RAY, CAN YOU SEE MOMMY?"
>>
>>33267964
>Any female that’s walks through the castle gates that Celestia thinks her sweet, innocent, son with a foot long cock may fall victim to.

Sorry ms. But you’ve been selected for additional screening
>>
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>Anon, I know the girls an I have been bad. But before we go. I wanted to give you this
>>
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>Really enjoy reading about Celestia being a mother and getting a glimpse of what a loving mother actually is
>Cannot get into the /ss/ side of things no matter how hard i try.
This thread is nice and you are wonderful people.
>>
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mother goose
>>
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>>33269112
WHAT THE FUCK IS A LIZARD AND A PURPLE NIGGER DOING WITH MY MOMMY?! GET AWAY FROM HER!
>>
I want momlestia to momlest me.
>>
>>33268968
no u
>>
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>>33246356
>>
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>>33268751
>I WANT YOU
>>
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>>33269399
>That face + shading
>>
>>33269336
>Denying your mother cake
>Even once
>>
>>33269399
>I WANT YOU
>To slam your pee-pee down mommys special hole and never let go
>>
>>33269399
>I WANT YOU
>To slam your pee-pee down mommys special hole and never let go
Yandere human celestia mom when?
>>
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>>33269947
>>33269949
>yandere mom/auntie
I would
>>
my aunt went to moon prison and all i got was this fireass mix tape
>>
> Mom you can’t do this EVERY time I have a date! Stop blocking the door, I’m going to be late!
>>
>>33270631
>>33270631
>Ywn have to Dark Souls your mom just to leave the castle
>>
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>Luna's first interactions with her Nephew after her return from the moon were less than stellar
>>
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.> i dont think the Principal's so is all that great. Just saying
>>
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>>33270730
>implying i wouldn't find that adorable as shit and take it in the spirit it was intended, forging a friendship through creative insults about each other and various inhabitants of equestria.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjHclWPVij0
>>
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>>33270631
>>33270668
>"But my sweetheart, you're the most precious treasure in mommy's hoard."
>>
Meanwhile, on a spirited outing with the royal family
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0IQCLQDfKw&
"Ah jeez..MA! MA! Lookit' this friggin' thing over hea'!"
"Ma..ma, this things fucked up."
>'Stahs above..jeezus, sweethaht, it's..it'- Anonymous, sunshine, what is it?"
"Well, friggin', I mean..it's gotta be like some kinda' ehh..baby whale or somethin'?"
>'I'm not sure, sweetie, I mean it looks like more of just the head a' somethin'...'
"Fuarkin' A..that is some weahd' shit we're seein' right hea', ma'..."
>'Here fishy, fishy~..Anon, gimme a piece a cake.'
"Ma, like, if that friggin' things sick, I don't think cake is gonna help.."
>'Oh? You da weahd' fish docta' now or somethin? Gimme the cake..'
>She drops a handful of cake near the floundering creature, who does nothing
>'Oh you sunnuvabitch-..THAT'S A FRIGGIN' PIECE A' 500$ D&G WHITE CHOAKLIT RASPBERRY CAKE YOU UNGRATEFUL MOOK!'
>Anon chuckles
"Hehe..raspberry sucks."
"Ehh, Auntie, bring us around the uh, poart' side over there..I got a feelin' ma' is gonna go back for that cake."
>'YOU BET I AM, MISTA'. ANONYMOUS, BABY, DERE'S TWO THINGS I DON'T STAND FOR: TALKIN SHIT ON JON BOVI AN' WASTIN' CAKE.'
>>
>>33270631
>Anon's been seeing Zecora for a few months
>He's starting to impulsively rhyme during natural conversation
>Mom stops him just to hear him talk more
>>
>>33271263
>"Mom, did you slip me some LSD?"
>"It's the only solution I can formulate as to why I am in such a rhyming state!"
>>
>>33270668
>I'll never get to play DS1 with my mom and aunt
>They'll never try to convince me to join their covenant and gang up against their sister
>>
momplease!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xtYWV0Uoy4
>>
>"Luna, I think Anonymous is getting to an age where he's curious about women."
>'Oh? What makes you think so? Could our darling Gallahad of a Nephew be approaching manhood so swif-'
>"Luna, look at me and then go look in the mirror."
>Auntie looks up from her coffee & paper
>Mom's figure is covered in sharpie graffiti
>'Anonz boobiez', 'Anonz mommy', 'Anons mommys hair', 'Anonz butt'
>"..Just got off the phone with their customer service folks, it's non-toxic so..you know, at your leisure.."
>Auntie pulls open her robe and glances down at her chest
>'Anonz loonar playgrown', 'Anonz qut auntie'
>"I'm glad he's learning some penmanship and possessive's, though- also, I just found out saliva washes this right off."
>"Anonymous? Sweetheart, you can come out of your room now~ Mommy and Auntie need your help with something."
>>
>>33270783
>Celestia sends anon to serve as a diplomat to the Griffons, to settle some sort of border dispute
>enter the meeting hall by kicking in the door
"AWRIGHT LISSUN TA ME, YA BEAK-NOSED COONTS!
>>
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>tfw no legoman linda-tier mom
>>
>>33266637
>>33267761
>You accept the fact that no women that you bring home can ever defeat your mother in single combat for the right to date you, so you fight your mother for the right for them to date you instead, no longer having to worry about her chasing away any more of your girlfriends in the future.
>>
>>33272949
>snake eater plays in the distance
>>
>Good night kiss
>"Sweet dreams, Dearest nephew"
>>
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>>33272949
>>33273051
she'll always be my 'boss'
>>33273326
y-you too
>>
>>33266637
>Sunset Shimmer gets her ass kicked by Celestia.
>Sunset and Anon go on dates anyway.
>>
>>33273481
>She doesn’t like Anon having to leave before dawn every day to make make it home before his mother wakes up to raise the sun
>>
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>>33273481
>>33273747
>needing girls when you've got two women
yikes
>>
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>"Do I even want to know?"
>'Sunshine, hush, it's actually a very funny story. See, your Aunt and I were making a friendly wager; as sister's do, and I thought...'
>"Why. Is one regular monday too much to ask?"
>>
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>"Anonymous, please, if you can't be mature about this then we'll have no choice but to limit it to strictly at-home."
>'Mom, I was j-'
>"Just about to keep giving me that slackjawed thousand yard stare, I know."
>"..Anonymous, you're much, much more than just my son..and I hope I'm much, much more to you than just a mother."
>'Mom, stop, I was just going to-'
>"I WANT us to..to be more than a means to an end; I want you and I to.."
>'..Mom, I was just going to tell you you forgot to put your bra back on.'
>"Huh?-Ohmyword!"
>'Yeah, see? They have an effect on you when you first see em'..'
>>
>>33274806
>At celestia's discretion anon gets called for counseling sessions every once in a while with celestia
>In reality anon gets called in for what celestia calls "milkies time"
>Anon gets really embarassed by the name but cant deny her mommys big milkie breasts that need to drained
>>
>>33273747
>Oh Anon you treat me so good~
>>
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>>33275358
>The ?th year super senior
>Went through too many chad's to count in her extended stay at CHS
>"Noo, not I; far be it from ME to tell my son what's best for him."
>"Disgusting.."
>>
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>>33274893
>tfw the pump broke
>>
>>33275394
>meanwhile Luna's prepared to go full on yandere
>>
>>33275539
That's your mother, damnit, you suck and squeeze those for all their worth; that woman carried you for 9 months and brought you into this world
>>33275618
Good. Good.
>>
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>>33275684
welp, time for me to get back on the ol' grind then
>>
>>33275846
>"Anon, brah, like, we almost never see you outside of school, bro, sup?"
>'Ah..same shit different day really..why do you ask?'
>"No reason, brah, just, like..we don't hang out a lot or nothing, just wonderin.."
>'It's my old lady, man, shit.'
>"Ahhh, haha, mom's, right?"
>'Ha, see, I knew someone else would understand.'
>"I get it, dude, mines always on the warpath about me not cleaning my room or something."
>'It's such a bother, god, it's like "YES, MOM, I'll pick up my underwear off your bedroom floor right now if it's such an emergency."..Jesus.'
>"Hahah, w-what?"
>Anon's phone begins ringing
>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5zUuld79m0]
>'Fuckin' A...speak of the devil, right? I gotta take this bro, sorry- Hii mama~'
>Anon makes a talk talk motion with one hand, rolling his eyes before waving to his classmates; taking his leave
>"S-See ya round, Anon!"
>Anon turns back waving
>"Mom, stop, I was just bs'ing with some of the guys-, see? That was them saying bye right now."
>Anon still has to console and reassure a very possessive mom & auntie that they're the most important women in his life
>>
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>"Oh, what a sight...he really must've tied one on tonight."
>'We shall grab his legs. Sister?'
>"Of course, right away. Let's get my handsome boy inside and in a warm bed.."
>'Verily. What would the neighbors think if they witnessed our nephew splayed out in our bush?'
>"I don't even want to know, Lulu."
Night mom, auntie
>>
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What dream did aunt Luna just come back from?
>>
>>33276386
>Luna drops in and spy's on the wet dreams mare's have of her dear nephew, the near sight of her nephew doing such things to those mare's excites her so, causes her to wake up and to leave the Dreamscape.
>>
>>33276386
It's this. This is what she came back from.

https://derpibooru.org/1879271
>>
>>33276768
Jesus Christ how horrifying.
I'd wake up in cold sweats from a nightmare like that, too.
>>
>>33276768
>plantigrade
yeaaah baby
>>
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>"D-Did his mom just crack the fucking AIR?!"
>"..Give him back. G-Give him back to her NOW."
>>
>>33278230
>No! Demand my mother give up cake for a month and pay you 1000000 bits for the trouble! Do it! It’ll be funny
>>
good son bump
>>
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Mom is sleeping, time to sneak out and find some honeys. Post cuties for me plz
>>
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>>33279672
>>
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>>33279697
Who's that hot dame?
>>
>>33279697
>>33276684
What girls have Celestia & Luna's blessing to date Anon that aren't them?
>>
>>33279923
Candyass and Twiggles.
>>
>>33279923
Twilight is probably number one on the list.

>1. She's a princess now, so anon wouldn't be marrying below his status, and she has the power to keep him safe.

>2. She know's what Celestia and Luna are capable of, so she'd never step our of line, or do anything to hurt, because she does she's getting double worked by two alicorns who are both older and powerful than she is

>3. She's such a desperate virgin she'd do anything to keep anon happy.

>4. she needs Celestia's approval like it's the air she breathes, being allowed to marry her son would the ultimate sign of approval

Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if she had been grooming twiggles to be the perfect waifu her for her baby boy.
>>
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>>33279923
>>
>>33279923
Celestia & Luna would most likely not want any of the noble class to date their son/nephew, they would most likely only want to date him for political or financial gains and as well they would claim to love him, but the truth is they loved the idea that he represents as prince of Equestria, this would be a problem with most of the women who try to date him, Celestia and Luna want someone who wouldn't be completely intimidated by his status and be free to love him for who he is, maybe someone who already interact's with the princesses and they know they can trust would be a start such as one of the wonder bolts like fleetfoot, spitfire or one of the elements, I'm sure there are more who are worthy of the blessing to date their son/nephew that I'm missing so just use your better judgment on this one.
>>
Mamaaaaa
I don't wanna go to work right nowww
>>
>>33280162
Have we given her a name yet? Or does she have one already? Need for green purposes
>>
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>>33280020
>>33280035
>>33280239
>Twilight grew convinced Celestia was going to let her marry Anon when she grew up
>"Princes Celestia! We have a problem! Prince Anonymous said he doesn't like me that way!"
>"... Well.. I'm sorry?"
>"But this throws all of our plans away!"
>"What plans?"
>>
>>33280932
>She doesn’t want to marry him herself
Wtf I hate this thread now
>>
>>33280935
Sorry to shit on your wish fulfillment
>>
>>33279810
>Anon constantly goes out and picks up random babes to take home and pound into the mattress
>It’s always his mom in increasingly elaborate disguises
>>
>>33281292
>Celestia is able to use her magic to transform (somehow)
>She always gets his plans before he leaves, changes forms and teleports >meets anon at some point and flirts with him
>later gets plowed by anon
>after a while she slips up and calls him by name or something when they haven't met
>>
>>33280949
As long as you’re sorry
>>
>>33241314
Christmas Molestia
>>
>>33280851
Notlestia McMommerson
>>
>>33281594
Who is that stallion?
>>
>>33281393
When Okcupid goes wrong/funny/sexual??
>>
>>33242553
how u doin fampai? your first post?
>>
>>33281665
Regene Regetta
Trollestia was once an Innovade.
>>
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>>33281692
>"So uh, how'd you two meet exactly?"
>Mom blurts out 'work' while Auntie mumbles something in a cough
>"Neat. I think we'll start out with some wine while we wait for the appetizers."
>'Anonymous, sunshine, I want you to watch your drinking, you know.'
>"..I'm sorry, what?"
>Luna elbows mom
'*Ahem* What our sis-..co-worker means is perhaps the wine would better be suited for the main course.'
>"Hmm. Alright, waters for now then."
>'..I want to see you clean that plate too, young man- OW! Luna!'
>>
>>33281725
Hm. He’s pretty sexy. I’d eat his asshole
>>
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>>33243845
>sees anon shadow
does anon have a question-mark shaped hole in his face? is so that makes the rape much more horrifying
>>
>>33281746
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgNp8th0huw
>"Anonymous! Luna!"
>"..Both of you, stop that right now!"
>"I want you OUT of that projection booth and in your seats right NOW."
>"Skies above, I can't take the two of you anywhere.."
>>
We back up?
>>
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>>33281594
>This is gonna be so much fun!
>You giggle to yourself, as you adjust your moustache in the mirror.
>"By the moon--What in tartarus are you doing sister??"
>Luna stands in the doorway to your bedroom, eye lowered in curious annoyance.
"Shh! Keep it down! I'm gonna play a joke on Anon!"
>"A joke?"
>Satisfied with how the phony facial hair looks, you put on your top hat, and glasses.
>"Hey! Those are my reading glasses!"
"I'm just borrowing them for a moment. Calm down!"
>Luna grumbles trotting up next to you.
>"You still haven't told me what joke you're going to play on Nephew Anonymous."
>Stifling your laughter, you take a deep breath.
"Anon is out in Canterlot at the Juice Bar. I'm going to go there disguised as a Stallion, and pretend to "Spit the game" as the colts, and Fillies say."
>"Yikes, and oldpilled."
"What did you say?"
>Luna smiles through cringe.
>"N-nothing. Do you really think this is gonna work? I think Anon is smart enough to see it's just his adoptive mother in a suit with and fake moustache."
>You wave a hoof at her, brushing off her comment.
"This disguise is foolproof. Anon will think I'm a totally different pony!"
>"Uh-huh..."
>You give a little twirl in the mirror.
"How do I look?"
>"Let's see. A seven foot tall alicorn princess, dressed in a suit, and brown fedora with a moustache that's about to fall off at any moment. Absolutely ridiculous."
"Oh phooey on you, fun police."
>You canter out of the room, with Luna in tow, as you head for the front gate, the guards saluting you on the way.
>Obviously it's Luna they're saluting. Right now, you're not Celestia. You are-
>"What are you gonna call this new persona of yours anyway?"
>You tip your Fedora in Luna's direction.
"So glad you asked! I am--"
>You pose, standing on your hind legs.
"THE JEFF!"
>"Oof."
>You gigglesnort, galloping off into the city, to find your son.
>Luna watches from the drawbridge, brow furrowed.
1/
>>
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>>33282047
>It's not even Five minutes before you get to the bar, "Mike Litoris Juice" bar.
>Wait a tic. Mike Lit-
"Oh! There he is!"
>You see your son sitting at the counter sipping from a brightly colored glass, leaning on his forearms.
"Okay Celestia. Show time! This will be, as the youngsters say: "E-Been"."
>You straighten yourself out, and saunter up to the counter, sitting next to your son, who glances your way briefly, before going back to his drink.
>How should you start things off?
"Hello!"
>NO! Your voice! Deepen it!
"A-A-AHEM! I mean-[Hello there, youngster]."
>Anon looks left, and right at first.
>He then looks at you, pointing to himself.
>"Are you talking to me?"
"[Why yes, Yes I am, fellow youth.]"
>He scratches the back of his head.
>"Oh...Uh...Hi."
"PFFFT-"
>You immediately suppress your laughter. He's totally fooled! Your disguise is impenetrable! Luna didn't know what she was talking about!
>"Are you okay?"
"[O-oh! Yes! I am! How about yourself, fellow youth?]"
>"Can't complain."
>He goes back to his Juice.
"{So Comrade youngster, What is that drink you are "Sippin" on my Home-me"]"
>How can they talk like this?
>Anon curls an eyebrow at your hip-hop slang.
>"Uhm...This is "Mike Hunt's Nectar". It's pretty good. A little salty though."
>You nod.
"[I peep game fellow youth! That sounds the bomb diggity!]"
>"Right...."
>Okay Celestia. Time to ruse Anon!
>You look around, and lean in close.
"[Say, uh...do you want to go into the bathroom, and "knock the boots together"?]"
>His eyes widen in surprise.
>"Excuse me?!"
>He's so about to freak out!
>You grin slyly.
"[I was offering to let the "smash" happen!]"
>Anon scrunches his face up, like he just ate a lemon at first, then he looks around the Bar, and leans in close to you.
>"F-for real?"
2/
>>
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>>33282139
"[Yes! Let's go find a stall, and "get in it" as the young Zebras say!]"
>He blushes. seemingly shrinking into himself.
>"I-it's get it in. a-and okay. Let's go..."
>Huh.
>He gets off his stool, grabbing you by the foreleg, taking you to the Stallions restroom.
"W-wait! Are you serious??"
>He looks back at you, with a lustful grin.
>"Of course! I need a good release, and I can see you need one too. Why else would you proposition me like that?"
"I-I was just Joke-"
>Your words fall on deaf ears, as he shoves you into an unoccupied stall, where you see various writings on the walls.
>For a taste of the night Come to Canterlot Castle at midnight -Luna
>There's going to be a serious discussion with her about this later.
>Anon pushes you onto the toilet seat, closing and locking the stall door behind him.
"H-hold on a moment. I think we're going too fast-"
>"Are you backing out now?"
"W-well no, but-"
>YES. YES YOU ARE. THIS PRANK IS GOING TOO FAR NOW.
>"Killer, bend over and drop em."
>Drop what? You heard the youth say, "Drop it like it is hot", but drop what exactly? You're starting to panic.
>You gulp, slowly turning around.
>"Geez.. Here, let me help you-"
>He grabs you by the waist, and undoes your pants, pulling them down partway. Just enough to have a view of your exposed puckerhole.
"O-Oh dear! Anon! Wait!"
>He takes your flanks in his hands, pressing his face into your bottom.
"SWEET SUNLIGHT!"
>You can feel his bumpy tongue swirl, and trail circles around your anus, sending shivers down your spine. Your legs wobble, and you struggle to keep your wings from shooting outward.
>"You like that,huh? I thought you would."
>What sort of depravity has your child been getting into when you weren't looking?!
"N-nggh..Ah~!"
>"Look at your butthole pulsate. It's begging me to put something inside it."
>Such foul talk! You can't believe your ears!
"UUUOOOH!"
>Anon buries two fingers into your rump unexpectantly, nearly making you buck in surprise.
3/
>>
Should I stop?
>>
>>33282253
pls no
>>
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>>33282253
I retract my prior statement.
Yes, keep going, so long as you promise to finish it before this thread's done.
>>
>>33282532
>I retract my prior statement
So stop?
>>
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>>33282546
>>33282253
nah, keep going
>>
>>33282546
I deleted my post saying stop.
Keep going.
>>
>>33282866
Why did you want him to stop?
>>
>>33282866
Actually nvm. I saw your post. You do know irt made a thread telling him to fuck off and never come back right?
>>
>>33282903
It was one dumbass trying to speak for the vast majority of us who actually like Kirko.
I just want him to finish his Yona story.
>>
>>33282976
I looked at the last thread and they were celebrating that he was gone though. Besides that yona story(I thought it was fun) triggers those babies. Just let him write, free if irt
>>
>>33283010
Of*
>>
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mom pls
>>
>>33283588
>Get down from there rainbow!!
>Why were you in anon's bed!!
>>
night mom, auntie
>>
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>>33283845
I bet they won't let me have sweets before bed so that they can have it all to themselves!
>>
>>33283588
>tfw clouds could be a pony family name
>>
>>33283010
It’s not thread related. Drop it, and stop being a faggot op for once in your miserable life
>>
>>33284510
I don't know what's going on aside from the usual drama/retardedness associated whenever kirko shows up, but I'd be interested in seeing him finish what he began here.
Kidding, he was likely going to fuck it up or make it weird anyway.
>>
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>This compelling bit of photographic evidence was snapped by an amateur princess/squatch hunter
>He says the mother took to his cake baits fairly quick while a smaller, greener squatch; likely a juvenile, was wary and seemed skittish
>Though once the mother noticed she was being watched, she abruptly took off with her youngster in tow
>The stallion recounted hearing the juvenile call out "Asshole!" repeatedly during the encounter
>>
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>>33284941
>Big celestia floatie
>Green juevenile squatch
FML
>>
>>33283688
>We were just comparing abs I swear!
>>
>>33284515
If you were kidding you wouldn’t have mentioned it and deleted your posts . Give it a rest with the “merely pretending “ meme ok? Just give the guy a break
>>
>>33283688
>implying Rainbow is the only one
>>
>>33285901
>>
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>>33285901
>>33286101
>nightmares
>>
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Does anyone have the Celestia one of these?
>>
>>33286189
Becomes reality!!
>>
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>>33286205
>>
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>>33241314
She's Princess Green Christmas
She's Mama Sun

She's Princess Heat-sister
She's Princess Hundred n' One
>>
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>>33286358
Friends call her mom miser
Whatever she touch
Turns to lewd in her clutch
She's too much
>>
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>Anon, sunshine!
>Where's my white hatchback!
>>
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Fear not, Son Unit, I shall make the necessary repairs to the 4channel

Beep boop Anon is the king and he is the best at all the stuff please recalibrate frosting concentrations and fill cake reserves boop beep
>>
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>>33287030

NPC: #6942 [version 1.1]

>Run: B:\Text\Greetings.wav
"Greetings Sun_butt_mR1".

Will recalibrate frosting concentrations and fill cake reserves.
>Execute: B:\Executeables\Frosting.exe
>Python_3.4.0.exe
>Script_Frosting
Your frosting concentrations have sucessfully been recalibrated.

>Script_Cake
>error
Something is blocking: Area: Cake_Reserves. Would you like to try again?
>>
>>33287118
Python!? I thought I made you in C#. And who's drive is this!?
>>
>>33283845
What if little Anon woke up in the middle of the night and wanted a glass of water? Would Celestia hear him and climb out of bed to get it for him? Or would aunt Luna get it? Or just one of the royal guards?
>>
>>33282903
It was one autist who did it. His thread was shamed, people made a competing thread, and eventually it was purged because nobody wanted to be on it. If that doesn't tell you how little it spoke for the entire thread, then I don't know what will.
>>
>>33287745
Off topic. Stop it discuss mom not how a toxic thread fucked up
>>
So what do you guys imagine the reason Celestia takes young Anon under her wings is?
Did he wake up her maternal instincts?
Did she figure he'd be safer with her as he is not from that world, and none of the M6 would be able to take care of a child?
Something else?
>>
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>>33288002
Maternal instincts imo.
>"One does not live eons without experiencing love, heartbreak, and all the encompassing territories between.."
>"But it wasn't until I was blessed with my son that I truly; very truly knew what it was to love..a-and of course to be a mother."
>'M-Mom, stop..' Anon sniffles
>>
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>"Nephew.."
>"Dearest Nightsong, would you like to sit in Auntie's lap while she plays a dating sim?"
>"Yes, a mushy dating game that will likely involve a kisss~ *mwah* and some cuddles, ahah~"
>"Why don't you help us play, too?"
>Anon gets situated in his Aunt's lap as she puts the controller in his hands and rests her arms atop his
>The screen lights up and a title card soon appears
>'Made For Me: Straight shota edition'
>>
>>33286697
>"Aw jeez here comes the friggin' purple one again..."
>"Sunshine, can you just BS some excuse or somethin'? I ain't seen a blink a' relaxation since I modded them wings on her.."
>"Atta' boy...whose my big handsome man, eh?"
>"Heheh, yeah, it's you~ TONIGHT!"
>>
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>”S-Sunshine! Ah~!
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>>33289199
Always wanted Anon to be Celestia's biological son..
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>>33289279
I prefer step/youthful mother just get the max eugenic effiency
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>>33289548
>Anon wonders why he hasn't seen his father if he's the only human in Equestria
>"Oh sunshine, your father was just like an exact copy of you, he even had your sense of humor ...but then one day he disapeared, I don't blame him he must had a reason, so please don't hate him"
>Anon grew up resenting him anyways
>Anon finds a strange contraption in mother's artifact room
>He sees a flash of fire and lands on top of some bushes
>"Hey this sent me all the way to the courtyard... but it seems diferent"
>"Anonymous creature! state thy name!"
>"Mom what do you mean? Its me your son, did you lose some weight since last morning?"
>"I have no children and they wouldn't be so rude as to comment on a maidens weight!"
What to do?
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>>33289698
Wasn't how i pictured but ok
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>>33289199
>helping mom work out that back pain
the son we should all strive to be
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Damnit mom, a dark Prince doesn't NEED a bedtime! And it's a friday!
>>
So what can you get a princess who can literally have anything she wants? A school principal would be easier but still hard to shop for though.
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>>33289698
pretty much the plot of Red Dwarf
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>>33291064
>magic horse mom: something handmade most likely; a card, something from the heart
>amazon principal mom: something coffee/cake related a handmade card from her teenage/grown son would also make her day
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>>33291064
I bet she'd appreciate what I'm planning on doing for my real mom for christmas: baked goods, made by me.
I'm not sure what it'll be yet, a cake may be too much trouble since I don't have the hardware needed. I may have to settle for something simpler, not because I mind spending a lot of time, but because cakes are hard to bake without a tin to bake 'em in. It doesn't have to be as good as commercial stuff, but I want it to be at least somewhat presentable and tasty.
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>>33286697
I’m taking it for a spin ma!
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>>33282532
That pic makes me think Mother intercepted yet another love letter to her son. The smile expresses a cocky amusement at the writers attempt at wooing her beloved son. While the state of undress shows the casual state in how she feels about the constant flow of Marriage proposals, pleads to elope, and just simple booty calls her son receives.Meanwhile Anon wonders why no one writes him and thinks he has no friends
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>>33291515
>why no one writes him
Unless you count the archives of letters from secret admirers that just happens to be penned upon parchments only found in mom & auntie's study
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>>33291522
At least my mom thinks I’m cool
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>>33291543
That's all I'd need 2bh
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>>33291522
>Mom and aunt work out their sexual frustration at not being able to shatter his pelvis by sending in detailed, graphic, and heartfelt letters. They have story arcs, sagas and several parallel universe s
>>
>>33291767
>"Luna, your spiderverse Anon would never act like that in canon!"
>'As if your X-Guy Anon isn't needlessly OP!'
>"His weakness is his love for his mother!"
>Gary Stu, Gary Stu, Gary Stu!'
>>
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>"Anonymous, sunshine."
>"Where did you find that?"
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>>33292144
I don't like the implications of this post.
>>
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>>33291784
>"..'I'm sorry, Dawnlight, you're a nice girl, really..'"
>"'It's just that..my heart already belongs to my mother-,uh I-I mean to another!'"
>Aunt Luna walks by while mom's penning another chapter in 'X-Son: Origins'
>'Cringe.'
>"Why thank you, Luna! I admit he isn't the cool immortal vampire edgelord YOUR Anon is, but I guess we can't all be original as you with your run-on sentences and CONSTANT USE OF THE ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE." *Slam*
>>
>>33289784
>>33291150
>Universe laws don't know how to make sense of Anon's existence since his story from another dimension doesn't carry over
>the universe has to create a perpetual buckle where Anon is both his own father and son
>Anon realizes he's destined to make his mother feel romance (as a lover), sadness (by abandoning her), happiness (as a son) and then abandoning her again to conceive himself in the past.
How would Anon (you) deal with this?
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>>33292144
What mom. Didnt think I new about your "painting" classes during college
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>Luna
Sister...
> Did you teach Anon how to do the “Big Bang”?
For self-defense only I swear!
>>
Your Misogynist ways are neither endearing nor alluring to me son.
>Is this because I walk around naked?
>>
>Nothing else matters anymore! Not the princess, not the kingdom, Not even friendship! You will love only me, you’ll look at me!
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>>33243932
>"Anonymous."
>A familiar voice calls out to you.
>You look around the room but can't see who just said your name.
>Something feels off though, but you can't put your finger on it.
>It's almost like some details of the room are wrong.
>"Anonymous."
>The voice calls out again more clearly than the last.
>This time, a small white light starts to form in front of you.
>You bring your legs down from your chest and begin to crawl on your bed towards the light.
>Instictively, your hand moves to cover your eyes as they readjust to the brightness.
>The light grows until it is about as large as you are.
>A figure can be seen inside of it.
>It's...
>Your eyes widen and a smile instantly appears on your face.
>"Anonymous!"
>As fast as you can, you get up and run to the light and jump into it.
"AUNT LUNA!"
>You cry as you wrap you arms around your aunt's neck.
>"Anony- Ooof."
>She is cut off due to your surprise hug and is tackled to the floor.
"Aunt Luna! You're here! You're really here!"
>"Anon... ymous... you were having... a nightmare."
>She manages to say while trying to breath as you continue to hug her neck.
>What?
>You loosen your hold on her and look around the room.
>It's your room.
>In the castle!
>Looking down, you see Aunt Luna on the floor.
>You must have really tackled her.
"Oh shit! I'm sorry Aunt Luna."
>You bend down and start helping her up.
>"It is alright my nightsong. If it were me in your situation, I would have most likely done the same thing."
>She explains as you both sit on your bed.
>It was just a nightmare.
>A bad dream of your life from a long time ago.
"So... how much did you see?"
>"I was alerted to your nightmare a short while ago. I saw from you running away and then walking to the, 'bus' I believe you called it. I attempted to enter your dream but could only view it until the very end."
>A sigh escapes your lips.
"Probably because it wasn't really a dream, so much as a memory."
>>
>>33293583
>She drapes a wing around your back, resting it on your shoulder.
>"Memories work differently than dreams. A dream can be guided in a direction and possibly even controlled by the dreamer. However, a memory is more akin to a book. No matter how many times you read it or how badly you want something else to happen, it will always end and play out exactly the same way."
>You think back to the first time you dreamed when you got home.
>It was more of a memory of your years away than a dream, which would explain why Aunt Luna couldn't do much to help you.
"I guess that makes sense then."
>You look at your phone on your night stand and see you were only asleep for about an hour.
>Not to mention you feel bad that you dragged her away from whatever official business she was doing to try and stop your nightmare.
"I'm sorry you had to come here to try and help me. I know you're probably busy with night court or watching over other ponies dreams."
>"I would not worry about that if I were you. There are a select few for whom I would drop everything and rush to their aid. And you, my dear nephew, are one of them."
>She looks at you and smiles while lightly touching your nose with a wingtip.
>A smile forms on your face and a chuckle escapes your lips.
"Thanks."
>You really missed this feeling.
>The feeling like you mattered and were loved.
>Without even thinking about it, you lean in and hug her.
>She gladly accepts and wraps her wings around you.
>The two of you hold your embrace for about a minute until you start to pull away.
>"Will you be alright or would you like me to stay until you fall asleep?"
"I should be fine. Thanks though."
>With a nod and a smile she stands up and starts to walk away.
"Oh hey, while you're here, that dream got me thinking. What would you like for Hearthswarming? And any idea what mom wants? I keep asking, but she just says 'anything is fine.' And that really makes it hard to shop for her."
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>>33293587
>She stops and looks like she is deep in thought.
>"Your mother has always been hard to get gifts for."
"Yeah, what do you get the princess who can move the sun? I mean she can have anything she wants. You too for that matter."
>"I personally would be more than satisfied with my nephew being home for Hearthswarming."
>You chuckle again.
"Sorry to ruin the surprise, but you got that. Anything else?"
>She thinks for a moment.
>"What about something you make us?"
>You immediately think of hand made gifts you gave them years ago.
"I'm not some kid. I want to give you something good. You know, something you want."
>"And what if I want something you make me? A drawing, painting, or even a treat from the kitchen."
"Okay, I mean if that's what you really want."
>"It is."
>She strides back to your bedside.
"Anything in particular for a treat?"
>"Some rum balls would be nice and festive. Cake of course for your mother."
>She kisses your cheek.
>"Sleep well my nightsong."
"Night Aunt Luna."
>She walks to your door and turns as she leaves the room.
>"If you really want, you could always make me copies of some of your music."
"I'll include some Boston for you."
>You respond, mentioning one of her favorite bands.
>"Thank you my dear."
>She says with a smile as she continues on her way.
>You lay down in bed and try to get comfortable.
>At least you have some ideas to work with.
>Just hope you have enough time and they like what you can make them.
>But that's for another day, because you really need to get some more sleep.

That's it for now. Might try to get something else out later if the thread is still up. If not, happy holidays all.
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>>33293595
That was sweet.



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