[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Search] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/ck/ - Food & Cooking


Thread archived.
You cannot reply anymore.



File: 12053403.jpg (201 KB, 470x595)
201 KB
201 KB JPG
/kitchen mischief/

me? i use metal utensils in teflon pans
>>
>tabasco says keep refrigerated after opened
>open it and leave on counter
>>
>ground beef must be cooked to 71C
>cook it to 69C
>>
I substitute olive oil with melted butter, every single time.
>>
I mix in a little cum with the rest of my wet ingredients. Every single time, if I'm making anything that has any sort of liquid added to it, you bet your bottom dollar I'm gonna swish some of my seed in there. You may be asking, how would I be able to crank one out so many times in a day, and the answer to that is simple. I don't. I've created what I like to call my own personal cum stash, where whenever I get the excited feelings I just masturbate like normal, and during the cleanup I try to scoop as much into my jar as possible.
>>
>recipe asks for 2 eggs
>use two table spoons of mayo instead
>>
File: 16b.gif (1.51 MB, 425x481)
1.51 MB
1.51 MB GIF
>"employees must wash hands before returning to work."

I take a fat loose shit twice a shift and have never washed my hands after. If you eat at my sonic you can get fucked. Also gloves are out of the picture.
>>
Enjoy your poison, OP.
>>
I steal women's underwear after I bang them. I have a nice stanky collection to sniff when I jack off.
>>
>>11889190
Are you a woman? My wife told me most women don't wash their hands after voiding urine or feces. She claims women are filthier than men.
>>
>>11889006
Nice
>>
>>11889006
>>
File: 711956.jpg (16 KB, 172x231)
16 KB
16 KB JPG
>"salt to to taste"
>add exactly 1 level teaspoon of salt
>>
>>11889764
Im butch as all hell but yes i am a woman.
>>
>>11890749
Imagine the smell
>>
>>11889676

Sniff my girlfriends dirty panties everytime i jack off. Shits nice.
>>
>>11890749

I only eat at home. You're a filthy cow however.
>>
>>11888998
Fuck you. I have 9 non stick pans for breakfast and I swear to god Imma Kill the next nigga I see using anything but a rubber spatula in them
>>
>>11889190
Only soi boi numales wash their hands. I always laugh to myself when I put my freshly piss stained hands on door handles at work.
>>
>>11888998
>recipe says to cook ground beef and drain it
>don't
>let any liquid evaporate
>brown it in its own fat
>>
File: 1549508473948.jpg (216 KB, 819x912)
216 KB
216 KB JPG
>>11888998
>me chinese
>me no joke
>me go pee pee
>in your Coke™
>>
>>11890882
>this old man
>he played one
>he put dick inside my bum
>with a nick knack
>paddy wack
>give the man a Coke™
>>
File: 1523670202951.jpg (94 KB, 645x773)
94 KB
94 KB JPG
>>11890753
>>
>>11890902
>this old man
>he played one
>he put dick inside my bum
>with a nick knack
>paddy wack
>give the man a bump
>this old man came rolling home
>>
i feed my wifes vegan friends beef broth
>>
>>11890867
fat doesn't evaporate though, r-right anon?
>>
>>11890769
>>11889676
>kitchen
>>
>>11890840
>eating 9 non-stick pans in one meal
Do Americans really do this?
>>
File: file.png (307 KB, 470x595)
307 KB
307 KB PNG
>>11888998
>asks for a pinch of salt
>add a dash instead
>>
I sometimes fold when the recipe says stir. Fight me.
>>
I never tighten the lids on anything. Dressing, spices, almonds. My wife says shell divorce me the next time she picks up and Advil bottle by the top and have it spill everywhere. Joke's on her, I stopped feeling love in this marriage after the first kid.
>>
I wash my cast iron pans with soap
>>
>>11892851
What's wrong with this?

"Seasoning" is a disgusting. Wash your cast iron with soap and apply a small amount of fresh oil to prevent rust.

EZPZ
>>
I make hotsauce with pineapples.
>>
>>11892861
>and apply a small amount of fresh oil to prevent rust.
That's fucking gross. Who wants a coating of rancid oil on their pan?

the whole point of seasoning is that you don't have to keep your pan perpetually oily and sticky. seasoning is rock-hard, non greasy, and is not affected by anything short of industrial abrasives or fucking lye. Why would you want to re-oil your pan every time when you could have an inert pan that never rusts or needs oil instead?
>>
>>11892602
I think you have an extractor fan to clean, buddy
>>
>>11892882
It's the same shit that accumulates on a flattop grill at a restaurant, and disgusting.
>>
>>11888998
>extra virgin olive oil
>use it to masturbate
>>
>>11892861
What the fuck does "Eezed peezed "mean?
>>
>>11892896
>>disgusting caked on grease is the same as seasoning
No.
>>
>>11893149
EZPZ refers to "easy peasy". It's a boomer meme for saying "easy".
>>
>>11888998
>go to Goodwill
>every pot and pan is teflon
>harsh gashes in all of them
>plastic cooking utensils are warped and discolored
>guitar hero controllers are missing their wireless dongles
>buy a crt tv
>try it out at home
>internal damages to the screen and high pitch persistent whine from dying capacitors
>bf uses a bike pump on me for wasting his money on /vr/ memes
>>
>>11893263
>>bike pump
You're just lucky you didn't get the fig or the double bardex.
>>
>>11893270
We're not made of money, his bike pump will have to do

At least he doesn't hit me with his tire iron any more
>>
>>11893290
I can send you some ginger and a bardex nozzle if you want. Post address.
>>
>>11893303
I don't think my bf would be happy with me doing that desu...
>>
File: 031.jpg (38 KB, 680x783)
38 KB
38 KB JPG
>box says to microwave for 2 minutes in a 1100w microwave
>use a 700w instead
LIFE SO RECKLESS TRAGEDY ENDLESS
>>11889006
Absolutely based
>>
>>11889764
>She claims women are filthier than men.
In my experience this is true. Just look inside a woman's car.
When I wageslaved at Subway the women's bathroom was always worse than the men's, also my girlfriend and her friends let their dishes pile up for over a week, my buddy's girlfriend does the same.
>>
>>11889190
>taking a shit
do americans really do this? in my country we leave ours
>>
>>11893365
>women claim their bathrooms are filthy
>they're afraid to sit down all the way down and just hover over it and hope they get it in
>this leads to making the stalls filthy
sit your ass down all the way.
>>
>ask a question on ceekay that I already know the answer to do that I can correct retards who answer incorrectly
>>
>>11892843
You're me.
>>
>>11893403
>he doesn't scrapbook the fecal matter of local strangers.
What the actual hell is wrong with euros?
>>
>>11893365
Women also have no concept of action = consequence.
>>
File: 1549752876725.jpg (241 KB, 1795x1795)
241 KB
241 KB JPG
>>11890849
>not pissing directly onto your hands as to leave your scent on whatever you touch
>>
>>11892611
D E V I L I S H
E
V
I
L
I
S
H
>>
>>11889190
based
>>
>>11893149
huh?
>>
>>11894259
honk
honk
>>
>>11894259
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoGnGFIE2as
>>
>>11893403
I'm still holding in my shit from 2018
>>
>>11889676
I have a stash of clothes from girls I've fucked that I use as cumrags



Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.