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Hand over the oats and no one gets hurrt edition
Old thread: >>2950908
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damn
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QUICK, GUYS, THE GAME IS ON
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>>2960526
those were cool
>>2960527
thats cool and all but i see no point in this, races and obstacles are more fun
>>
>>2960619
Races are probably the most boring thing in sport (includes human running competitions, etc) for me.
>>
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>>2960526
>oats
I wonder what a horse would chose: oats (even the best instantoats for human consumption are an option) or freshly cut, wet from morning condensation grass and herbs from an alpine meadow
>>
Someone knows of some really good quality recorded horse noises like neighing?
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>>2960526
brother..
>>
>>2960701
I think it’d depend on the horse and what it recognized as a treat. I think a handful of oats would be eaten before a handful of foreign grass clippings, but not if those fresh tasty herbs were in the treat bucket instead. Everything is better when it comes out of the treat bucket.
>>
>>2960540
that's a big neck
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>>2960799
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the dark one really has a great time
>>
>>2960799
>>2960800
>>2960801
what psycho would let this go on and not intervene? the white horse clearly needs to be in it's own field.
>>
>>2960804
Isn't it like normal social interactions for them? I remember watching some film a long time ago about feral horses and it was quite brutal sometimes. They don't wear horseshoes in the wild though, so less damaging potential.
>>
>>2960804
can't tell if serious
>>
>>2961091
for those pones, the 80s never ended
>>
it's from at least two years ago and they still haven't trained a horse to lay down yet, why are horses so dumb?
>>
>>2961215
>doesn't actually train
>wonders why the horse doesn't learn anything
>>
>>2961091
very cute
>>
Anon that bought that penthorse magazine, have you received it? How do you like it?
>>
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>>2960552
>>
is carrot stuffing anon currently eating carrots again?
>>
>>2962150
I've ate a few before going to work today, yes. I'll eventually will get bored with them and stop eating them though.
>>
>>2962192
If I was you, I'd just turn it down a notch which would prevent them from getting boring or too much and I could enjoy them way longer.
Maybe go from 1kg to 0.5 and then 0.2
>>
>>2962222
I do things like that with food all the time - eat a lot of one thing, get bored go to next. Repeat. How quick depends on food.
Can horses get bored of food?
>>
What is healthier to give apple or carrot treat?
>>
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haha, time to drink water and look depressed
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>>2962683
it's healthier to give both
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>>2960552
I wish I was that bench
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>>2962713
Is it the weather?
>>
>>2960718
If you ever find out let me know. Been looking for horse noises for my white noise machine.
>>
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>>2961095
They call it the Neighties though.
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>>2961528
Due any time now, I'll post some things soon as it arrives.
>>
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>>2960527
>>
>>2960527

I don't get how Friesians work.
It's like they are in total control of gravity.
Every move of them looks so sprung and damped as if they can temporarily turn down gravity for each leg that is about to hit the ground.
>>
>>2962859
>Being crushed by a bunch of 500 kg animals
Not so sure about that
>>
>>2962865
JACKOS.
>>
>>2960552
lol
>>
>>2960552
Very cute. Is it normal for horses to sit like that? Or just trained?
>>
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>>2960526
>Hand over the oats and no one gets hurrt
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>>2963367
I've caught them sitting like that. Guess getting them all lined up like that involves something extreme.
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>>2963542
>something extreme.
hope it's not meating horses
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>>2963542
>it's all so tiresome
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I wish I had a console to play this
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People keep posting this clip, but where is it from? Quiero sauce, por favor
>>
>>2963645
here you go, buddy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mFgmHMygh4&feature=youtu.be&t=53
>>
>>2963649
Thanks, friend
grinning at how they walk away casually after the awkward jump
>>
>>2963649
It's good to see the guy is a good sport and they probably weren't taken back and hung upside down by their feet for two weeks.
>>
>>2963768
>hung upside down by their feet for two weeks.
Man, that are some fucked up thoughts you have.
>>
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>>2963800
I meant hooves.
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>>2963826
That is some weird shit.
>>
What is the smallest size horse that does not have health issues because of being bred too small?
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>>2963768
I actually had never heard of that until I started coming to these threads, why is that done? Is it some kind of super fucked disciplinary thing? When I try googling it I just get results about how to hang a horseshoe to catch good luck
>>
>>2963367
Not normal no. Most likely they were trained. Though a horse might sit against something if it's bored (or has an irritation).
>>
>>2963917
next thing he will tell you about horses falling appart like bread in his hands
>>
>>2963915
And he and his log were never seen again
>>
>>2962899
Oh baby!
>>
>>2963915
The shadow in the foreground though..............
>>
>>2963912
Falabella. They outlive full sized horses on average.
>>
>>2963920
Where we're going we won't need foals to see the light
>>
why would you put gaiters only on the front legs and not on all 4 of them?
>>
>>2960527
aww bless him. the trust he must have for that guy.
>>
>>2964371
Load distribution probably.
>>
>>2964371
Can you break this horse jaw with that leverage and fulcrum?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJoIdrLqxLU
>>
>>2963826
EC major does some gud stuff
>>
When I pet horse, she chews on my clothes lightly. I've searched and that is some "mutual grooming" thing, should I prevent that in the future? Horse is not mine, I just pet it.
>>
>>2964527
Some people say you should nip it in the bud, others say it's fine. If she's not some ultimare where any minor flaw would destroy years of work I'd say let her groom you a bit. I enjoy it.
>>
>>2963542
This pony has a pizza on his back
>>
>>2964570
It's actually a growth. The spots that look like pepperoni are infected blood vessels that have grown huge. This pony is not long for this world.
>>
>>2964414
that would be extremely painful
>>
>>2964617
He's a big horse
>>
>>2964635
especially his balls
>>
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>>2964639
Look away, Anon.
>>
>>2964025
And you can even ride them. Very nice small horses.
>>
>>2964764
It looks like it would bite your arm off if you get close enough
>>
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>>2964639
Is that normal? Usually they're not so visible.
>>
>>2965193
Next the horse will be wearing a ball gag
>>
>>2965198
Usually they're gelded
>>
>>2965204
You never tried a little e-stim?
>>
>>2965205
I suppose that makes sense.
>>
>>2965214
I do. Got one of those rods you can put way up your peehole and attach to the machine.
>>
>>2965218
Sweet, I haven't tried sounding yet. I've been using the conductive rubber straps.
>>
>>2965220
Just don't put them on your chest area apparently. They cause you to die.
>>
>>2965222
Yeah, anything above the waistline is no go.
>>
>>2965198
Like with humans, the balls tend to drop a lot when it's very hot outside and they're not running around
>>
>>2965205
Also this, most horses you see are gelds and mares.
>>
>>2965193
Why I keep watching this?
>>
>>2965365
It's neat
>>
>>2960527
a horse that good doesnt jumping haver that it have to be
>>
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>>2965497
>a horse that good doesnt jumping haver that it have to be
>>
>>2965193
that horse has worms
>>
>>2965549
Maybe, but horses do just do that you know. Their asses get itchy.
>>
>>2965511
Source on that pic?
>>
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>Oh anon! You simply have to try this mescaline!
>>
>>2965664
>kisses teats
>>
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>>2965664
>tfw you will never ever be as happy as that filly is to lay on a couch
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>>2965688
>I got to take a little time
>a little time to think things ho ho
>>
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>>2965721
Looks comfy.
>>
>>2965511
artist?
>>
>>2965631
>>2965869
Anhes
>>
>>2965873
Thanks, anon
>>
>>2965193
That fence is probably turned off.
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>>2965950
Something's turned on
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>>2961528
It finally arrived. It's got that whole "shouldn't exist in this universe" vibe.
>>
>>2965987
Looks like it's in a decent condition. What is the content?
>>
>>2965995
Just flicked through it because I have to do something but from what I seen a ton of horse pun ads, horse pun movies, write in things from the POV of a horse, the centerfoal is like an interview with it and some other things. Definitely worth the 4 credits. Might leave it in the forest some time.
>>
>>2965987
>>2965999
GET HYPAH
>>
>>2965999
>centerfoal
kek
>>
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>>2966119
>my angel is a centerfoal
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>>2966238
Interview
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Stable of contents if anyone wants to request a page.
>>
>>2965987
>>2965999
tear out pages and leave them at crime scenes lol
>>
>>2966291
>the mutilator horseman stuck again
>at least we have 10 tips to excite your stallion
>>
>>2966246
Random horse book club, please.
>>
How can I make horse neigh?
>>
>>2966779
Try neighing first
>>
>>2966779
You can use positive reinforcement to make a horse neigh at any target you like with brutal efficiency.
>>
>>2966927
now that is just cruel.
no one should weaponize something powerful like a neigh.
>>
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>>2966931
It's only a matter of time before our enemies do and then where would we be?
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>>2966932
>scratching your butt with the planet
horses really do think big
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>>2966240
Yeah that's pretty fucking bizarre.
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>>2962715
t. A horse
>>
>>2967406
I mean that's pretty much saying she only got the job because he gets to bang her
>>
>>2967545
That's the most obvious bit, but keep in mind that a foal is a sexually immature horse. Also the pic of her peeing. If feels like this magazine came from a different world.
>>
>>2960526
If I take your mask off, will you die?
>>
>>2967600
it would be extremely neighful
>>
>>2967598
It's a long way to go for a pun
>>
>>2967598
How does this actually work with horses? Stallions don't touch mares until they are ready and go into their season, or just try to rape whatever moves?
>>
>>2967738
Stallions are driven mostly by mare heat smells. If you lock him in a pen with a foal, he's unlikely to try to fuck her, but if there's a mare in heat in the next pen over, he'll probably brutalize the poor girl.
>>
>>2967678
You're a big horse
>>
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>>2967769
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>>2967812
>>
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what's your opinion on new horse breeds?
>>
>>2967875
Well can't go any worse than some existing breeds.
>>
>>2967875
deviantart sparkledogs of the equine world
>>
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Well, horsegen? Is she right?
>>
>>2968071
No.

[spoiler]I seriously doubt the horse's gender would stop them if they were so inclind.[/spoiler]
>>
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>>2968071
>Most people can understand how any lonely male, out in the woods with his only mare, looking at her long flowing mane, muscular body, and large dark eyes
I think she should have really capitalized on her writing talents instead of worrying about horse sex or whatever. Maybe she could have even made some horse comics.
>>
wh...what?
>>
>>2968071
She is just mad that men find her less attractive and pretty than horses. Probably tried to approach someone with horse and he paid more attention to horse than her.
>>
>>2968177
More like at 4pm he will become Mr. Teodor of Hands
>>
>>2960526
>Hand over the oats and no one gets hurrt edition
Why are horse generals ALWAYS so unfunny? This shit belongs on Facebook.
>>
>>2968211
And you don't belong in these threads. Your point?
>>
>>2968071
This was clearly written by a stallion.
>>
>>2968071
That's homophobic
>>
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>>2968113
>What's the matter, anon? Is my long flowing mane, muscular body, and large dark eyes getting you easily sexually aroused?
>>
>>2967986
couldn't have said it any better. all the focus is on looks, horses are no longer as practical as they used to be. there is no need for new breeds. they're just a grade mutt.
>>
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>>2966590
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>>2966590
Page 2
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>>2966246
Portrait of a killer?
>>
>>2968536
>>2968537
>>2968538
i refer to this writing style as 'grandpa's Readers Digest stories' humor

women drivers huh. 101 things overheard in a courtroom. my wife hates it when i go golfing in the afternoons (full-page ads for car seat covers and heirloom watches).
>>
>>2968538
COW POOP
MAKING
HOLE
NIGGER
>>
>>2968376
Manes are really attractive.
>>
>>2968621
Yeah, it's from a different era. Still a nice thing to have.
>>
>>2968700
are you ok there?
>>
>>2968071
>When you choose a horse, choose one that is the same sex as you, and you'll eliminate most of the sexual temptations
[spoiler]Tell that to Mr. Hands[/spoiler]
>>
>>2968795
Left page, partially in frame text.
>>
>>2968926
OH.
>>
>>2968538
>Pony corporation
>>
???
>>
Hey /hg/ I’m starting a horse farm and want to give horses anime girl names for the meme but I’m not really a weeb pls gimme suggestions
>>
>>2969774
Twilight Sparkle
>>
>>2969774
Just use names from that weird horse manga or whatever it's called (if there are any)
>>
>>2969774
This is an excellent way to confirm to everyone that you're fucking your horses. Just give them normal horse names.
>>
>>2969893
"normal" horse names are just as cringe inducing as that guy's weaboo idea
>>
>>2969903
You can't really go wrong naming horses after flowers.
>>
>>
>>2969774
Well you call the best mare Asuka obviously
>>
>>2969903
They're normal though. It's culturally acceptable to name your horse "Cookie" or "Ruth". It's not culturally acceptable to name your horse Maki or Asu-

>>2969960
I literally wrote Asuka in the above post before reading this. Okay, nevermind. Some weeb names definitely work for horses.
>>
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>Jazz for you foal
>>
>>2970046
I-is this nasogastric tube for horses?
>>
>>2969893
weebs fuck children not horses
>>
>>2970091

Yep, horses can't vomit and have a terrible habit of getting reflux, so we often use nasogastric tubes to aspirate reflux. It could also be an endoscope, but the tube looks way too clear for that.

From someone who has done it, the whole procedure is a pain.
>>
>>2969893
I promise I’m not fucking horses bro it’s just for the meme I will be legitimately breeding some tbqh
>>
>>2969774
>>2970110
Just use Sailor Moon and Gundam names.
>>
>>2970110
Is fucking horses even that wrong to be judged? I mean, its certainly better for a horse than races.
>>
>>2970110
>I promise I’m not fucking horses bro
>I will be "legitimately" breeding some
kek

>>2970147
Not at all, I was just rustling his jims. Horsefuckery isn't nearly as bad as most of the other shit we do to horses.
>>
>>2970147
Yeah, there's some real interesting mental gymnastics when it comes to dicking an animal. I can legally put a captive bolt gun to it's head, kill it, chop it up with a chainsaw and dance around in it's blood but if I tongue blasted it's brap hole suddenly that's "abuuuuuuse" and you're looking at jail time.
>>
>>2970186
Yeah, like that Goldstud productions guy is "legitimately" making educational videos. He's not just filming his horses blasting loads and charging for the videos.
>>
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>>2970110
quijote, get the cuffs
>>
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>>2970295
Forget the cuffs, grab the lance
>>
>>2967875
For some reason, the statement “new horse breeds” seems odd to me, the first thought that came into my head was “there are new breeds of horses?”. Also, what breed is that one, the coat is very nice
>>
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>>2970337
Forget the lance
>>
>>2970367
Could we have even one thread without degeneracy?
>>
What business do horses have having such soft noses
>>
>>2970367
So sad to see a tired horse
>>
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>>2970380
They hide a powerful secret.
>>
>>2970380
They most probably can't see just in front of them, so they developed there vibrissae and soft noses with muscle and nerves to "see" there.
>>
>>2969912
Comfy pony is comfy
>>
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SGd7VZkNxeg
>>
>>2970383
Chaos all day must take it out of you
>>
>>2970388
that is fantastic. he knows he has to get that flimsy thing to the side first before trying to open the door and does just that. smart horse
>>
two horses deciding who's in charge:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sr-Mzc82_6Y
>>
>>2970367
Is it me or anatomy of legs is weird there?
>>
>>2971020
WHY ISN'T HE STOPPING THIS, CLEARLY A DANGEROUS HORSE, ABUSE!!!
>>
>>2971020
That guy talking to foals is great.
>>
>>2971050
Might be, better check the full pic to be sure.
>>
>>2971147
Don't. It's got nudity.
>>
>>2971050
that happens when you serve chaos
>>
>>2965987
not sure if parody, weird pre-internet zoo forum, or both. history?
>>
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>>2970295
>>
>>2971193
It's a parody. Got a foal peeing in it though.
>>
What's your thoughts on that place trying to induce ossicones on horses through grafting?
>>
>>2971209
If I remember correctly she hit the horse and eventually got charged for it. The horse was fine.
>>
>>2971186
Heretics deserve nothing less.
>>
>>
FEED MINTS 2 HORSE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xs_alR_ltvI
>>
>>2971535
GIVE ME I CANT SEE IT BUT I CAN SMELL IT GIVE ME GIVE ME
>>
Anyone else visisted by that horse skeleton at night that makes you really successful?
>>
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>tfw hoodlums stole the new foal, killed her and then used her blood and organs to spell out "JUDAS" on our mega lawn
>>
>>2963542
Pony express pizza delivery
>>
>>2971352
those horses are obese
>>
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BRAP
>>
>>2972215
>klaus
holy fuck, that guy has been around for literal decades.
>>
>>2972217
Fug, I thought I was the only one that remembered him.
>>
>>2971917
Excuse me what the fuck
>>
I'm only indirectly associated with horses (my sister rides them and is currently doing volunteer work at a barn up in Wisconsin) but I must say, I truly love these threads and the weirdness that goes on in them.
>>
>>2972301
What weirdness?
>>
>>2972303
horses do strange things and these threads are just as strange
>>
>>2972301
Everyone likes horses, associated or not.
>>
>>2971352
Brother, please... Some oats...
>>
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please, my horse ... he's very sick
>>
>>2972403
What causes this?
>>
>>2972445
You see, when a horse and a spider love each other very much...
>>
>>2972403
>modern """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""art"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
>>
>>2972365
sadly, this isn't true
>>
File: soontobeabigguy.webm (1.78 MB, 830x466)
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>freshly hatched and already more than half as tall as you
>>
>>2972612
They are quite attractive, so I think a lot of people like them one way or another.
>>
>>2972632
Horse eggs are neat
>>
>>2972632
Seems to like the guy a lot more
>>
File: 43CAzu7.jpg (170 KB, 640x427)
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>>2972632
>when they shed their first skin
>>
File: eggs.jpg (24 KB, 279x381)
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>>
>>2972612
>>
>>2972632
Very, very cute.
>>
>>2972632
I guess we won't have to care who he is until he puts on the mask
>>
File: o_hi.webm (1.74 MB, 984x714)
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>>2972881
it's a give and take
>>
>>2971917

????
>>
>>2972883
Looks very friendly (those chains are quite retarded though)
>>
>>2968071
She makes it sound like men don't mount Male horses as well.
>>
>>2970368
>do you know where you are.jpeg
>>
>>2973230
It's one of those tiered lawns with the slopes.
>>
>>2972883
Is it a cotton in its ear?
>>
>>2973514
>he didn't know how cotton is farmed
>>
What is the most SMASHED AND SLAMMED horse?
>>
>>2973765
A rabian.
>>
File: DSCN7370.jpg (168 KB, 800x600)
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>white anime eyelashes
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File: horseshow.png (1.32 MB, 1351x831)
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File: 1489684017477.jpg (403 KB, 1024x680)
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File: SPOOP.gif (1.32 MB, 352x343)
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>>2974051
>>
File: gear.webm (922 KB, 804x452)
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now that's some fancy gear



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