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/adv/ - Advice

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Catholics of /adv/, I am having a sort of spiritual crisis. My dad passed away last November. He was baptized Catholic but fell away from the Church throughout most of his life; in his last couple years, however, he met with a priest where he lived on more than one occasion to my knowledge. Through the course of the past few months after his death and after a lot of soul-searching, I decided to join the Catholic Church and began attending mass and receiving instruction. My path to the Church has left me with concerns about my dad's last few years and the repose of his soul that have left me spiritually disturbed. I try to fully place trust in the grace and infinite mercy of Christ but am haunted by a powerful and discomforting fear that my father's life and beliefs precluded him from salvation. He committed many grave sins without ever attending confession as an adult to my knowledge, and did not receive extreme unction upon his death (although my mother prayed at his bedside). I have been praying for his soul and am hoping to someday have a Mass said for him, but I don't know what else to do, what to think, or whether it's all in vain due to his manifold sins. Am I just retarded about this /adv/?
We can not help the dead, we can not judge or see what good or wrong they did. I often believed that my brother may have ended up in hell because of suicide, but I don't know for sure. Only God can judge, ease your mind.
This has got to be some if the most wholesome christposting i've ever read.

Based catholicposters.
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>Am I just retarded
What about having masses said? Plenary indulgences? What's the deal with the 'heroic act of charity' prayer? I am just 20 and new to this and lost and coming to grips with all this is just jarring.
Catholics like to believe their purifying humanity but their all just lying and shaming each other to feel guilty. Why are you shaming your dead father for not following a religion you just joined? Maybe he left because he figured this out long before and decided to live his life without burdens.
I am not shaming my dead father
Wish I could help you. But I already accepted that my parents are a lost cause. I'm the last Catholic remaining.
>I don't know what else to do
What you're doing is an admirable level of devotion already.
Just keep doing that. It's all we can do as humans - ask God for mercy.
We can do no more for the dead.

>what to think
You are doing all you can in this regard. Don't blame yourself for not doing more.
It's beyond you. It's beyond us all.

Don't obsess over it. I understand that you want the best for his immortal soul.
But in the end the ultimate goal of the teachings is about living a good life, don't forget that.

It's not in vain because God hears your prayers.
You shouldn't look at it through the materialistic view of "if I don't get what I'm asking for then it's in vain" - it's never in vain.

>Am I just retarded about this /adv/?
No. But there's a point where this could turn into an obsession. I don't think you're there yet, but don't let it become one.
Life's for the living. We can ask for mercy, and we should ask for mercy, but the ultimate judgment is His and His alone.
It's pointless to ponder whether our prayers have an effect or not because it's indeterminable. What's important, is to *believe* they do.
In the end, after death, we will learn the Truth.

>his manifold sins
God's forgiveness is infinite. It cannot be comprehended by us puny humans.
There is no "too much" or "too many". We can't even think of it in these categories.

In the end, nothing can damn him but himself, and it's too late to change that.
Only thing that remains is mercy. Pray for mercy. That's all.
One of the basic tenets of your church, assured to your father at his final confession, is that God is all-merciful and will welcome back the repentant sinner who comes to Him. To doubt that is to doubt everything else the Church tells you

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