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GUIDELINES:
Before you post, check the FAQ.
Try to keep questions concise. Use paragraph breaks.
edition.

FAQ:
>What do girls/guys think about <any trait, such as: looks, physical or personality traits, virginity, penis traits, or lack of dating experience>?
>Do <most/any> <girls/guys> like <an insecurity over the above>?
There is no one answer. Preferences differ and worrying about some complex only ever makes things worse. In fact, worries like complexes are very often the real problem.

>I'm shy and afraid of <people/rejection>.
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, bit by bit, step by step. You can't rely on some "magic moment" (or activity) to instantly change you.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. "Signs" of attraction are basically meaningless.

>Where do I meet people for <dating/friendship>?
Anywhere outside. Or online. Above all, leave your comfort zone.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me.
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, froyo, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, gallery, park, <activity in your city>.
>>
I will start, should I get my GF a gift for our 1 month anniversary?
I am 9%0 sure she will forget about it, not because she doesn't like me, but because she is suuuuuuper busy
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>>20326227
I'm thinking about earmuffs and something else, because she lost her earmuffs
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>>20326227
>1 month anniversary
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>>20326236
That sounds nice. It's only one month so something big would be crazy, but replacing her earmuffs is the right amount of thoughtful but inexpensive.
Maybe throw in a small box of chocolates.
>>
Where do I find girls who onlu want to stay at home cuddling?
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>>20326238
Hitler, real quick. What's your opinion on Peanut Butter, a known tripfag, samefag, and actual fag who hits dogs and abuses his girlfriends?
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>>20326255
>tripfag
I don't pay much attention, at least not more so than with other posts, save for a decision to take off my trip if he's active in a thread (tripfag overload being a real issue, for which I apologize).
>samefag
Not really provable. I haven't noticed it.
>actual fag
>girlfriends
Doesn't compute.
>hits dogs
Highly degenerate if true.
>>
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>>20326262
Oh boy is it true. How much for a cage fight between you two? He hits dogs so he can't be that tough.
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>>20326275
Well, my original statement stands.
It's a shame to hear that.
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>>20326278
Personally, I don't think it's fair to judge. If you've never eaten dog, you'd never be able to appreciate the silky texture of a properly tenderized hound.
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>>20326285
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>>20326287
It does taste good.
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Why do girls always say they're more socialized to be ashamed of their sexuality than guys? I know this sounds like an incel-bait question, but as far as I can see it's almost the exact the opposite of reality.
Like I can get in trouble just for it looking like I *might* have a boner at my job, so I honestly want to understand how girls could have it worse.
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>>20326362
I don't know, it's awfully strange considering that 90% of their clothing is skin tight, leaves nothing to the imagination, and shows cleavage like it's going out of style. BUT HEY, WE JUST HAVE TO HAVE EVERYTHING, I GUESS! JUST DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT OUR PRACTICALLY NAKED SILHOUETTES GUIZ, OR WE'LL SEND YOU TO PRISON!


fuck.

stupid women and their "oh but it shouldn't matter! you just shouldn't do it!" that's not a fucking argument fuck you fuck the world fuck society, and then fuck you again.
>>
Girls are attracted to me, but this didn't work out for me the way it should have, so I feel I feel a little bit afraid and when I notice it. How do I overcome this in a constructive, healthy way?
>>
My gf broke up with me today.

I said “okay” and nothing else

She got like “just okay?” And “can we still be friends”, and now she begs me to meet her in person and talk it out. I don’t want this. Should I reply why not or just radio silence? I don’t want anything more to do with her desu. Thanks.
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>>20326371
While I don't think I agree with the degree of woman hating in this post, the
>oh but it shouldn't matter! you just shouldn't do it!
mentality is exactly what I'm talking about. Like how the heck do women have it worse when we're actively told that being attracted to women, let alone ones dressed to be sexy, is an inherently bad thing that we shouldn't do?
>>
>>20326394
Then just say no. She is probably pissed that you didn't care.

Also that's pretty shitty thing of her to do it over texts.

Why did you two break up?
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>>20326394

Shut the fuck up
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>>20326394
Radio silence. She wanted to see you mad, upset and sad. Don’t give them the satisfaction. Ghost like you’re hiding from the ghost busters, lol.
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Have you ever dated anyone with a weird fetish?
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We've been together for a month, should I get my GF a $100 boots? or is that too much?
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>>20326509
beta
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>>20326495
Define weird. There's lots of stuff I think is really weird but is apparently super common, and lots of stuff I think is normal but is apparently super weird.
>>
So I asked this girl out today and she said yes enthusiastically. Told me to give her my number and I did.

She still hasn't texted me... should I be concerned or is she just trying to not seem too desperate?

Yeah I'm an idiot for not getting her number but I didn't think about it at the time.
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>>20326512
Get ready for a long ghosting.
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>>20326227
A date and a few flowers would be better. Don't go all out for 1 month. Just somewhere you both like and maybe a single rose or something.
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>>20326512
Some women are too retarded to send "the first" text message (they literally just need to say hi). You're fucked.
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>>20326394
Depends. If you're feeling petty you can just say
>honestly there's nothing to talk about I don't think, I felt like this has been coming and I actually agree that it's a good move to end things
And watch her stew on that.
>>
>>20326512
How long ago was this? Girls freak out about coming across as desperate or needy too so if it's only been a few hours since you asked her don't be alarmed. You might not hear from her until tomorrow.
>>
>>20326439
>>20326489
Should I “read” her messages or just leave it unread?
>>
Girls:

Would you consider a cancer survivor (particularly in my case, a 21 year old male who no longer has a stomach) inferior to a man who isn't? It's taken a toll on my body and now I'm at 6' and 129 lbs.

I don't want any sympathy, just honesty.
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>>20326544
earlier today, I guess by the end of tomorrow is a reasonable expectation
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>>20326583
Not a girl but at least you have a sense of humour.
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>>20326583
I am a cancer survivor. Nearly killed me and I will never be 100% healthy again in my life, barring the advent of new treatments or meds, and it's not a problem for me. I put the weight back on, got into the gym a little bit, and eventually I came to the place I'm at now where you'd never call me healthy if you saw my blood work but you'd never know unless I told you. It might be harder to wear my condition in my 30s and 40s but for now I am young and fit and girls are never concerned by it.
>>
Both genders, assuming I'm a personable, good looking, well groomed, dressed nicely, and nice but not a "niceguy" 19 year old in a university program of mostly girls, what are my odds of not dying a khv if I never ask a girl out? I know they're not great, but does any of that make a difference at all?
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>>20326597
Girls rarely initiate. Just man up and do it yourself.
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>>20326362
>Why do girls always say they're more socialized to be ashamed of their sexuality than guys?

Let's be real here... It's not that hard to figure out. Language tends to be a pretty good way of taking the temperature on approximately where any given society is in terms of what they do and do not think is relevant to them. In general, the more something is relevant to a society, the more words revolving around that concept there will be.

Off the top of my head, words that slam women for their sexuality:

>Whore
>Slut
>skank
>floozy
>tramp
>loose
>minx
>hussy
>hoochie


Meanwhile on the other end, what is there?

>Manslut?
I almost don't know if that counts since that's literally just throwing man at the start of a word that is associated females

>incel?
I guess... But that's in completely the opposite direction and is more about *lack* of sexuality, and on top of that, probably 80% of the population has absolutely idea wtf that word means. It's a 4chan word.

4chan is an echo chamber and the world exist in far grander scope outside of it. But even on 4chan, more words are used to hate on "impure" or "slutty" women than are used to hate on men.
>>
>>20326613
I've only heard like 3 of those words, and one of them is in the title of Disney movie, so I don't know how well that argument holds water.
Honestly though, I wasn't exactly asking for proof that they're shamed, so much as how. If it's literally just words then I find it hard to take that quite as seriously.
Plus there's there's the fact that words formerly used exclusively for men have slowly become gender neutral, or even feminine.
>>
Ladies, have you ever been attracted to someone physically/mentally, but they come off as intimidating in some way? And if so, what way were they intimidating?
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>>20326636
Bruh, chicks are literally attracted to intimidation.
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>>20326607
It hardly seems worth it though.
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>>20326540
Nah, he should just move on and have no reaction to whatever the dumb cunt is doing and saying.
>>20326562
Don't read them at all. She wants validation from you after breaking up with you, respect yourself and move on.
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>>20326636
Ideally, I should be a little intimidated because he seems like a cool, funny, knowledgeable guy and I hope he likes me and he should feel the same way about me and it all evens out. But in terms of type, I'm exclusively interested in sweeter looking men.
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>>20326674
>feeling intimidated by women

Kek
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>>20326653
Why? What's so horrible about rejection that you can't handle it?
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>>20326692
>What's so horrible about rejection that you can't handle it?
Rejection.
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>>20326692
It's not that I can't handle rejection, it's that the cost of rejection isn't offset by the value of the relationship for me. There's a handful of reasons any relationship I get into isn't going to last, so it's not really worth it to go out of my way looking for one when all I'm after is a demo copy to make sure I can't run the full game.
>>
How do I do a date? Do we plan to meet somewhere or do I pick them up? I'm assuming you're supposed meet somewhere for the first one. What kind of activities are you supposed to do? I've heard something like bowling or an escape room is good because you can see each other and talk freely. Our local escape room is inside a mall and I've seen going to malls is a no go, is it okay if it's just to go to the escape room?
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>>20326613
Women are far more liable these days to be called frigid, or will just be outright rejected if they don't whore themselves out.
Which is more likely: a girl saying she wants to wait until marriage, only to have the manwhore bail when he can't use her body; or some sperg shouting "whore" when a girl says "I want you"?
The answer is obvious, and you can arrive at it from many different routes. To use a separate example, there is a reason people complain about "slut-shaming" but it's perfectly acceptable to slam religion and morality as "outdated". And it's not because religion or morality are dominant.

>more words are used to hate on "impure" or "slutty" women than are used to hate on men.
On 4chan, yes. Not really real life. In the sense of use alone, there is still the legacy of what used to be an insult, although as far as actions go, it doesn't line up.
That said, the lock and key 'analogy' is cancer that should be rooted out and destroyed.
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>>20326221
why do girls go together to the toilet
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>>20326720
Meet somewhere for the first one. Escape room is a so-so idea and depends on the girl and the fact that it's at a mall is kind of low class. Ideally the activity you pick should be fun but take the pressure off having to hold a conversation for hours and hours. Ice skating and mini golf are great sate ideas.

Date ideas are ideally something that you can extend if things are going well. You take a girl ice skating and you're both having a good time? Cool, take her to grab some food afterward. Come. Up with your ideas for a primary activity, then look up what's around those areas that you can transition to if you aren't ready to call it quits yet.
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>>20326275
Last thread he also said he regularly abused his previous girlfriends.

Seems like quite the madman.
>>
>>20326221
made a discord server for ask opposite gender feel free to join:
https://discord.gg/PrHjtD9
>>
Dude here
I am getting intimate with a girl that is in a long distance relationship. She seems into it since I provide the physical affection that he isn't there to provide, but I'm worried shes only doing this to humor me because we had feelings for each other and I still do (pretty sure she does too.) Will she be guilty if things progress? Will she blame me? I initiated this, but I also made it perfectly clear that I wouldn't lay a hand on her unless she was comfortable with it, and she gave me consent.
>>
>>20326583
I'd say it's more impressive to survive cancer, than lifting whatever arbitrary amount of weight that doesn't really mean anything to me anyway.

You'd be far more interesting than the Chad-stereotype. Besides that, it all depends on how you actually are as a person, because how you dealt with it emotionally could be an issue.
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>>20326755
>Women are far more liable these days to be called frigid, or will just be outright rejected if they don't whore themselves out
Wait, so this is why I can get dates, but I always get ghosted a few dates in?

I'm a 26 year old virgin, and I wondered what the hell i was doing wrong, because it seemed like the dates were going well, but the last date always ends with them acting a bit weird, and then I never hear from them again.

Is that... Is that seriously why? Is sex that mandatory? I usually only go about 3 to 5 dates before they suddenly disappear.
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>>20326865
You're doing the right thing.
>>
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>Try talking to shy girl
>Sometimes she's actually engaging but convos are kind of one sided
>Shy to the point of almost lacking personality/opinions
Does she wants nothing to do with me and she's just too nice to express it?
>>
>>20326839
Bit of a story on this one, since I've been that girl before:
>Get boyfriend
>Things are great, can really see spending my life with this guy
>He decides to move far away
>Can't join him
>He tells me "not to worry, it's tempoary!"
>a full year later, still no timeline for when he might be back, only rarely see him on vacations when he can afford to take the flight
>I am told to not visit since he works in a dangerous country (Lithuania, Vilnius)
>A very good friend of mine starts to get more touchy
>Just let it happen for the most part, it's innocent enough, and with how little I see my actual boyfriend, I'm starting to feel like we aren't a couple regardless
>He told me it was just joking around, and that he wouldn't cross any lines
>Fine by me, I had 0 plans on actually cheating
>as we hit the 1,5 year mark, I hadn't seen my bf for half a year, and I was tired of these pointless skype calls.
>Friend slips up once, and goes for a kiss. Apologizes afterwards, and gives me some room.
>I would legit rather be alone than in a situation like this
>End my relationship with my boyfriend, and friendzone my friend who had been trying for more while I was in my LTR.
>We are still not dating, and I've made it very clear we shouldn't, either. He still holds out hope though, or so he says, but I know he sleeps around anyway, so I'm not really keeping him on a string.

The thing is, when you put yourself in your situation, you are taking advantage of a very obvious need she has. Whether she realizes it or not, you are abusing her trust and vulnerability in the situation to get intimate. In my honest opinion, that's an absolutely god awful foundation of a relationship. So really, progress isn't necessary, she could very well be blaming you already, you just don't know about it.

I do want to try later down the line, if he is still available. But you are putting her in a very difficult spot.
>>
>>20326878
...Really? I just feel I am getting closer to the point where people will assume something serious is wrong with me if no one else has wanted to stick around long enough.
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>>20326378
Please
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>>20326919
Sex has become an expectation of sorts that you don't necessarily have to cave into as long as you communicate what it is you want with the other person at some point. If you want to wait a couple of months or until marriage that's okay but you need to say so and yeah maybe that conversation is a little awkward to have but it needs to be done.

If you're going on 3-5 dates and never getting past a few kisses guys are gunna assume that you aren't interested in them or are stringing them along or just that your expectations for the relationship don't align. Expectations can't align if you don't communicate.
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>>20326928
No one answered you because your post doesn't really mean anything. What is your problem and what are you actually asking for advice on?
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>>20326934
I'm afraid of girls finding me attractive and sexuality more generally, which is making me unhappy. I have some ideas about how things might've gotten this way, but if I try to take matters into my own hands to fix it I get nowhere, because I get hit with a wave of fear if a woman shows interest. I don't know how to learn what I need to in order to form intimate relationships, because of this same fear response
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>>20326865
If you aren't telling them you're waiting outright, then either there is something else going on or you are dating some terrible people.

>>20326919
Men generally don't have the same thought process you do--where women will think "this guy hasn't attracted other people, why is that?", men will be more concrete and go with what they know of you.
Granted, certain types of them will be wary (note the hedonists on this board who bemoan "boring and inexperienced" girls), but that's strictly because of your body, and not because of you as a person.

Other women might give you shit for it, but I can assure you that the guy worth dating and marrying won't.

>>20326929
I'll tentatively give support to talking about it--it really does save time, and the men who use women as notches on a bedpost are instantly deterred with that (in particular, they can't have a specific timeframe or a nice-sounding condition like "I have to love you". That gives them an incentive to stay until they get what they want, and it happens more often than one would hope).
However,
>3-5 dates and never getting past a few kisses guys are gunna assume that you aren't interested in them
Is simply wrong unless you're in a very liberal, promiscuous area. Don't feel compelled to do anything to get guys to commit--it doesn't work like that for them. If you try to keep them around with your body where they wouldn't otherwise stay, they'll only stay for your body, not for you.

tl;dr do what the woman in pic related did and find that good guy
>>
>>20326929
Hmm... I just feel like it would be weird to bring it up out of nowhere... No one has really said anything about sex either, but I guess I could be missing some cues when they drop me off after the dates.

It's just weird... the last one we even agreed to meet on the 23. December for a Christmas date, bug then after the 5th time we hung out, he just ghosted me. Didn't get a response the following day, the second text I sent the following day was also left on read, and the third and last one I sent a few days ago (almost 3 weeks after he ghosted me) is now also on read. It just seems so weird. Does that really come off as not interested?

>>20326961
Hmmm. Interesting. I've actually been told I'm "a good date", because not only do I take a lot of initiative, I like more active and weird stuff (laser tag, wall climbing, etc), and I'm usually pretty good at planning out these dates on my own, too. Could be I am too weird for them I suppose, i just thought it was more interesting than just food at a cafe and then nothing else.

I guess I'll just keep at it then. I just feel like I'm doing something wrong when I keep getting ghosted out of nowhere despite putting a lot of effort into it. It kinda sucks if it is just because sex is all they want.
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>>20326983
Where do you find these dates?

Don't say tinder.
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>>20326881
Try to ask her straightly her opinion, "hey what do you think about x? And y?". You will see.
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>>20326986
>Don't say tinder.
...uhm... why not?
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>>20326993
Try literally any other app you can think of.
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>>20326983
None of that seems particularly weird to me, and it doesn't sound like your dates were put off by it, either.

Are you using a dating app? Those are going to be filled with the lowest-quality people of all your options, so it isn't surprising if this is happening to you.

>It kinda sucks if it is just because sex is all they want.
You can break down guys into three broad categories:
-Those who just want sex. The manwhores.
-Those who expect sex as a part of any dating arrangement (the majority of Western men). While they are not necessarily after your body alone, they will leave if they can't use it. So not malicious by definition, but inadvertently predatory,
-Those who solely want you. This isn't to say "sex is bad", and that they will never touch you. It's something to be very careful about--the men in this group will be perfectly happy waiting, and a subset of them would consider the waiting itself a positive.

Dating apps like Tinder are going to have a lot from group 1 and the dregs of group 2.
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>>20326798
To look after each other's bag so no need to bring it in the toilet where usually there's not a fucking place where to hang it, and we also use those 5 minutes to talk privately on how anything outside the restroom is going.
>>
How bad of an idea will calling my ex for her birthday turn out to have been?
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>>20326995
Whelp... I'll look around I guess.

>>20327000
It's not even that I am against sex, I just haven't actually tried it yet, and I feel a bit intimidated throwing myself into it. Even then, people aren't even being explicit about wanting it, so it's a bit odd that it's being glossed over like this. It's a bit crude, but I would just think it would be better to just outright ask if I was up for sex, rather than outright ghost me.

Seems my use of Tinder was my main error though. I'll see what else I can find, might have more luck there.

Thanks Hitler.
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>>20327005
>It's not even that I am against sex
Neither am I. I'm just against treating it carelessly.
But yeah, you'll definitely see more success outside of Tinder.

Good luck.
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>>20326221
1/2

I have a female friend who used to be very close to me. We used to work together a lot. She was like my mentor, and in a way was like the older sister I never had.
It was wonderful for the first few years of the friendship: her and I really got to know each other, not just about work but also about our lives.
Then earlier this year I'm pretty sure I hurt her when I had a mental breakdown at work since the environment became downright hostile. But despite this she still stood up for me to the shitheads in management who precipitated it and still blamed it on me. However, since then she's become a lot more distant and it's been hurting me. I thought things would get better after I changed workplaces (though we still have projects together since it's the nature of the industry/academia circlejerk) but she still insists on being "professional" all the time even though months have passed, and I'm still able to perform work, even if it's for other people.
We met last week for yet another meeting which I was not well prepared for since I had been busy with my other job, but I know I tried to do what I could. It didn't help that our supervisor suddenly changed things mid-meeting and I couldn't keep up, and that I had made an honest mistake by accidentally switching the locations of two of the numbers in a table. She asked to see the original data, which I pulled straight off an email she sent me, and she insisted was wrong (it was off the email she sent me to correct the bad data) and that I had disobeyed her directions by keeping the bad set of data. By this time I was pretty much in shock (which the supervisor also noticed) and I ended up overhearing her and the supervisor talk about another meeting whose topic sounded a lot like another project her and I had been working on, which I was not invited to.
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>>20327022
2/2
On my way walking out with her, I asked her if I needed to show up since it sounded a lot like our other project. At this point she's fucking livid, even saying things like I never worked on it (though I distinctly remember being at meetings related to the topic). Thinking back I'm hoping it's just a misunderstanding, the latest one in a long series that I can't seem to interrupt.
We're supposed to meet again one more time before the end of the year without the supervisor, but after what happened I honestly don't have the heart to send out the invitation. I don't even know if it will be responded to. I want to talk to her about everything I've written since quite frankly this loss of affection is killing me but I'm afraid she won't believe me and will just get even more angry with me.
>>
>>20327005
People aren't being explicit about wanting it because it has become a norm that somewhere in that 3-5 date mark you'll end up in bed. Guys will wait longer if they like you but since you aren't communicating they don't know that all they need to do is wait.

The other reason they aren't telling you they want sex is because even though men know we need to be the ones to initiate, we aren't strictly "allowed" to ask for it from a girl who isn't obviously down for it.
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>>20326961
>boring and inexperienced" girls), but that's strictly because

Actually I'm gunna fight you on that. Made friends with a girl a few years back. Nice and pretty and exceedingly naive. She told me eventually that she didn't even have her first kiss until she was 21 and it was like oh honey that explains so much. At least in her case though, her lack of dating experience (which I think we can all admit is a big part of our lives) had led to her being naive about the world and about people for much longer than you'd normally find, and her naivety caused her to be a pretty boring person to be around.
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>>20327045
I covered this--I said that men generally aren't going to look at the lack of dating/sexual experience proper as a flaw. Sure, you might have had an issue with her naivete, but that would have existed no matter how she got it.
>>
Tell her that you'd like to set things straight, clear the air, whatever. Try not to sound pissed when you send the message. Be as genuine as possible, maybe your feelings aren't as obvious as they feel. Unfortunately, if she doesn't reply to you, I don't know what you can do. If she never replies it'll feel pretty fucking horrible, I've been there before. I suppose its better to put your heart on the line and try to fix things though.
>>
>>20327116
Meant for >>20327025
>>
Yo is there much difference in quality between hitachi wands or am I good just getting one from lovehoney? I don't imagine there's much quality you can squeeze out of something that just vibrates.
>>
As a guy I feel the difference when I'm doing it without condom. What about girls ? Do you actually feel a difference too ?
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>>20326221
Why cant I get over my ex? He is clearly over me and I just cant seem to let go. 26 yrs old and this relationship is by far the hardest to get past. I ruined us by not being completely honest about an addiction I had been struggling with prior to meeting & dating him. I guess this is my karma and I deserve the pain I endure each day. Its just so difficult accepting that he doesnt love me anymore and doesn't want any contact with me. I never meant to hurt him. I regret so much shit but I have to muscle up the strength to continue life. Ive never loved anyone the way I do him.....I suppose if I lied, guess I didn't love him that much (according to him) I get hit on so much and I literally tell men "Im sorry Im actually in a complicated relationship" then go about my day. Will my heart ever heal? How can I accept that he's completely done?

What are some of the ways you guys have gotten over an ex?
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Where do I find girls who only want to stay at home cuddling?
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>>20326992
Last time I did that she chose to be neutral
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>>20327153
Stop thinking too much about her (almost impossible), then I found a job, did more sports (went from 6 hours/week to 11), and the few evening I had free I spent it playing video games with friends online or else some friends came home.
I spent 6 months like this before I met a girl that made me realize it was stupid to be sad because of my ex. Later when I started to go out with a girl I completely stopped thinking about my ex and was over her
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>>20327041
>since you aren't communicating they don't know that all they need to do is wait.
Call me an idiot, but I honestly had no idea sex was even a problem. I sorta expected then to tell me if it was something they wanted.

I might have autism.
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>oldest troll on /adv/ and /soc/
>people still reply to it (and ignore new legit questions)
>>20327180
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>>20326362
As far as my perspective goes, it's just the fact that men's sexuality is openly talked about - even if it's often the butt of a joke, it's acknowledged openly. Comedy often comes from taboos, sure, but there's a line, that's why people are often uncomfortable with jokes about rape or diddling etc. And female sexuality was just an untouchable subject. People literally played 'the penis game' where they progressed to shouting the word as loud as they could, but the word 'vagina' was an honorary curse word, grosser than 'cunt'.
I don't think it was an attitude of females themselves being disgusting, moreso that females are (or should be) above that and/or too fragile to handle it. But the impact was the same, because if I should be above it, what does it mean if I'm not? When I was going through puberty and developed a sex drive, I literally thought I was becoming male, because "only boys are supposed to feel this way, right?"
Doesn't help that your body is obviously changing around that age in ways you couldn't hide very well. Especially when your school uniform is sheer enough to warrant bra colour being specified in the dress code, eurgh. I'm amazed I never got heat stroke with how I bundled up 24/7 to hide any sort of shape.

I'm not going to compare my sexual shame to mens' though, because I'd have equally fucking died if I started popping boners when I was 12. I think it's one of those situations where it's just different for the sexes, not necessarily better or worse. I was also a very repressed individual, it's simply due to being female that I absorbed feminine forms of sexual shame, the opposite would be true if I were male. Maybe instead of the unspokenness stressing me out, I'd have instead been horrified that people were constantly blowing up my spot of being a horny little fucker by joking about it so openly. Just one of those things that you either experience or you don't, no one will ever know what it's like for the other side.
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>>20327183
Yeah, saw the photo thinking "haven't I seen this like 4 times before?"

Pretty obvious troll.
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>>20327186
>Doesn't help that your body is obviously changing around that age in ways you couldn't hide very well. Especially when your school uniform is sheer enough to warrant bra colour being specified in the dress code, eurgh. I'm amazed I never got heat stroke with how I bundled up 24/7 to hide any sort of shape.
I'm suddenly very happy that I never developed in that area.
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>>20326394
She was probably preparing herself for a big conflict over it, and doesn't know what to do in this scenario.
It's also kind of a bummer. For most people, breaking up is really sad. Even if you don't want to be in a relationship anymore, it's the end of something that meant something. To just get "okay" as if you don't care has got to be confusing her about what your relationship even meant to you. She probably wants closure on how you feel about all this, and its jarring going from you being someone important in her life to suddenly having nothing to do with you (which is why many people attempt to be friends afterwards to ease into it).

All that said, it's 100% your prerogative whether you engage with her further or not, just a little food for thought.
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>>20327195
You literally get 5 replies every time you post it, and they are all the same
>That is not unattractive
>don't use tinder, people are looking for sex, and don't give a shit about your personality
>work in your personality, maybe work out, you'll be just fine with a face like that
Literally every time. Try actually following the advice instead of continuing to make to stupid excuses.
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>>20327140
>As a guy I feel the difference when I'm doing it without condom. What about girls ? Do you actually feel a difference too ?

From a guy who has had sex with and talked to girls about it.

Most definitely. Even girls prefer it raw (except for, you know, the whole pregnancy thing).

Apparently the friction and heat just feels kind of completely off.

Plus, I know some girls get UTI's from using them.

>>20327175
>Call me an idiot, but I honestly had no idea sex was even a problem. I sorta expected then to tell me if it was something they wanted.

Heads up, Hitler, by his own admission, has no dating experience and furthermore pretty much rejects the idea of ever doing it.

Maybe not the best person to take dating advice from.

I've been on plenty of dates where sex is not the expectation.

Here's the thing though, while that may be true, a lot of the dates I've been on that lasted longer than a certain amount of time (3-5+), there would be a gradual escalation of flirtation and sexual tension that would eventually result in things kind of eventually exploding in a moment of intimacy. It didn't necessarily lead to sex, in fact, I'm someone who tends to be a bit more selective with my partners, so often times it was something as innocuous as holding hands or a kiss

I have a feeling that *that's* what you're missing.

It's not that you're not making it clear you want sex, that's not really what's important. It's that you're probably completely lacking in any kind of physical/sexual tension and it makes them feel like something is just.... missing...

That tension is an important facet of dating. It creates this kind of "push and pull" vortex that permeates through both of your actions. Your teasing/flirting, begets theirs, which feeds in to one another creating a kind of positive feedback loop.

You lack the "buzz" that excites young people in dating.
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>>20327203
>continues to ignore the best advice he could possibly get, and is provided every time he asks
Alright, I think I have a more honest response then:

You are mentally retarded, and even for sex, no one will ever want to touch someone who might potentially be too stupid to even consent to sex. People say you are ugly because it's an easier way to put you down.
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>>20327214
Whatever it is, your best recourse is to kill yourself.
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>>20327204
I have kissed with a few of my dates, though. It just never gets further than hugs and kisses.

>It's that you're probably completely lacking in any kind of physical/sexual tension and it makes them feel like something is just.... missing...
Hmm... I'm not fully sure what it means, but I can definitely try to be more "physical" and flirty, however awkward it might end up becoming the first few times. It's more awkward if people just straight up doesn't know I like them, anyway, so it's definitely an improvement regardless.
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>>20327214
Because the face is the easiest way to take something you cannot fix under any circumstances, and make that the dealbreaker. If they said you weren't for enough, you could work on that, but you cannot fix how severely retarded you are, so they all use your face instead. It's a subjective point, so they can't be harassed for it, and it means they get to somewhat protect your feelings as well.
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>>20327225
>People here would say I’m attractive if I was
They literally do, every time. You've been compared to Keanu Reeves for crying out loud.

But go ahead and keep nitpicking the posts calling you ugly, and continue to think your face is your only issue, and not that you have so obvious personality issues that even the girls rating you like >>20327214 can tell you are super unstable and has a terrible self esteem.

And let me make this clear: your self esteem is directly proportional to the willingness people have to fuck you. If you hate yourself, no one else will like you. That's how it works. You need to have confidence, and that is on you to fix.

Besides, if you just want sex, it's impossible to not get it. I knew a 26 yeah old hkv fatass who wanted to get laid, and it literally took him less than a week on Tinder. He went specifically for the ugly chicks, who clearly has huge self esteem issues. Easy sex.

But you won't do that, you want the 8+/10s, and refuse to go lower because you aren't attracted to anyone who is a 7 or lower. Faggot.
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>>20327234
>your brain is retarded
You've even been told this before, and yet you keep insisting it's your face.

Wew.
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>>20327234
Why have you not gone to therapy for your mental illness?
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>>20327180
are you hapa or something? you've got chink eyes
just make nose a little smaller and you'll be goodlooking
not ugly not hot either
above average
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>>20327238
>because my face is the root of all of my issues!
He is retarded, give the poor guy a break
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how weird is it to suddenly send memes to an acquaintance to initiate a conversation of the opposite sex? will i be mistaken as being interested in her?
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>>20327162
online
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>>20327242
>my doctor lies and says I’m handsome and just need to talk to girls.... she says try online dating. I try and FAIL
That doesn't sound like a doctor. Maybe try an actual therapist, because that's not how a proper therapist would help someone.
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>>20327242
Stop lying. You never tried online dating.
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>>20327214
Dude...

None of that is normal.

Like none of it.

That is not a response one person gives to another unprompted.

That makes it clear that you (knowingly or unknowingly) baited out that situation and response.

By that point, you've done something which made it she no longer gives a shit about what you objectively look like and is so bothered/annoyed by you, that she's looking for some way to get payback and insult/hurt you in some way.

I have a feeling that much of /adv/ and /soc/ react to you the same way.


>>20327218
>I have kissed with a few of my dates, though. It just never gets further than hugs and kisses.

That's good... but I have no idea if

>Hmm... I'm not fully sure what it means,
It's a kind of... mutual anticipation that you both share. It's like that feeling you get when you're waiting for something really good that you know is about to happen, but you don't know exactly what it is yet, mixed up with that exhilaration you get when you're playing a game or something, and the teammate your playing with seems to just be on exactly the same wave length as you, making everything feel effortlessly perfectly timing, without either of you ever having had to have really said anything. On top of that it's also a kind of... mysterious quality to it... where you feel slightly anxious because you don't really know what you're doing, but it's almost in a good way because you can feel yourself being swept away in to the moment.

It's a fairy ineffable phenomena that's seemingly contrary as explained there, but that's about as best I can word it for now.

>but I can definitely try to be more "physical" and flirty, however awkward it might end up becoming the first few times.

Just remember, the flirt precedes the physical. The physical must be warranted and wanted. Don't be a creep. It's the "explosion" that naturally occurs from built up tension.
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>>20327251
some people are born looking differently than others
I also am going to get rhinoplasty
you can get a girl without being hot, i was just answering your question
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To anyone that was ever in a relationship, how do you guys feel about polyamory relationships? I met a guy that talked about how he was in it and how both him and his girlfriend have different partners on different days. It feels weird how he talked about it as if it was nothing. I can't wrap my head around if there's a huge possibility that one of the partners will feel unwanted, jealous, might not have a chance to find a new partner, doesn't spend a lot of time together, various image problems with families, etc.

I know you need to communicate everything with each other if it ever happens, but it sounds pretty weird.
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>working Christmas day, along with cutie girl
>Notice I won't be seeing her again until that day
>approach her
>"Hey, I saw we're working Christmas together. If you aren't too busy, would you like to come to mine after? We can have a few drinks, some food, will be fun"
>"I'd really like that anon. Maybe we should all get ingredients and cook dinner at yours together?"

Am I going to finally have a cute Christmas
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>>20327261
Lol, unless the guy is in the top 1% of attractiveness, it will just be a cuckold relationship where the girl gets every dick she wants.
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>>20327123
I recently got the Mantric one they stock while it was on sale. First one I've ever had so I have no frame of reference, but I fucking LOVE it, highly recommended. Qualities I like in mine are it's very quiet despite being powerful, it's waterproof so easy to clean, it's rechargeable, it's texture is very pleasant to touch, it's handle shape is comfortable and it's not heavy enough to become a bitch to hold. If vibration intensity is the only factor, my guess is you can stab in the dark, you can only go so high before getting diminishing returns (mine's on the small side and I still don't have to hit max speed). Just make sure it has more than one speed, so it's not 0 to 100. You can probably wait for something to go on sale if you have patience and aren't too particular, I've seen various wands as the 'deal of the day' a fair few times before I cracked and got one (they also occasionally have killer email deals if you subscribe).
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>>20327266
Yeah I can see this being a pretty abusive relationship where the guy is just being used.
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>>20327265
that isn't what i said at all
it just doesn't fit the stereotypical standard of "hotness"
someone can still find you attractive or appealing but people that fit the normie standard have better luck
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>>20327180
Bump. Can a femanon answer? I need to state that I’m white, not Asian at all... could this be an issue since I don’t look white at all?
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>>20327275
Hot literally means sexually attractive... it’s abnornal for no females to find me sexually attractive during my best years. Explain what the normal standard is..... I used to think my face was absolutely good looking and appealing
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>>20327261
>To anyone that was ever in a relationship, how do you guys feel about polyamory relationships?

I can actually conceptually understand it.
Definitely not for me though and probably takes a very particular type of person in order to actually pull off (I might even actually know one).
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>>20327255
Stop being so selective then. Aim for someone closer to your level if you have to, build confidence, and move up from there.

You are clearly being too picky. I dont care how many girls you crunched through, if you go for girls too hot, you haven't actually tried.

I used to try Tinder, and I was very selective. At first, I mostly went for the super hot guys, but unsurprisingly got no matches. I'm maybe a 5, no real womanly shapes, and low to no confidence. Same deal. Go for someone below your own perceived level, and you'll do just fine.

It might feel bad at first, but it'll get better.
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>>20327279
>Hot literally means sexually attractive...

Actually it literally means having a high degree of heat or temperature.

kek

Anyway, "hot" and "sexually attractive" are not mutually exclusive. "Hot" is usually specifically associated with a superficial attractiveness, but you can also be things like "handsome" (which is usually associated with maturity), and "cute" (which is associated more with charm or personality), and a few other things, all of which are still sexually attractive, but not necessarily "hot"
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>>20327284
What’s my level??? I literally think I’m good looking. I can’t fucking accept that nobody agrees with me.... I want a girl I find to look good.... I think that’s.... normal...
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>>20327284
Just tell me why any girl that I find physically attractive is out of my league and not my “level” so I can kill Myself


Literally EVERY MALE I KNOW has been capable of mutual attraction and not being with a girl that they don’t find physically attractive at all.... I don’t shoot for 9s.... I want a girl I find cute like 7/10 that isn’t morbidly obese ffs
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Do men have a smaller dating pool than women? If so, does that mean men are prone to settling? I feel that even as a 7/10 non fat female, despite a handful of options, I'm struggling to find a connection. So I wonder whether dating is even more difficult for a man when he is looking for something serious?
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>>20327296
Can you answer my question? I’m >>20327180
And I need girls to tell me why I have no options
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>>20327296
And I’ll answer for you. It is. I make a lot of money and am an interesting guy who could find commonality on a lot of levels with girls... but girls don’t consider me as an option... the best I can do is 3/10 land whales.... and I try and try and my options don’t change. All I want is a girl that’s not fat that’s around 7/10 and I’m 26 now and it’s impossible. My friends who get girls make me so jealous and I feel suicidal and like I’m meant to be alone forever. I HATE living in this time period
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>>20327261
>I can't wrap my head around if there's a huge possibility that one of the partners will feel unwanted, jealous
I feel like people like this would generally avoid poly relationships, and would likewise be avoided by (non-manipulative) poly people.

It's not something I can ever see being interested in, personally. When I'm into someone I'm all in, I don't even find other people attractive anymore. But I understand poly people on a conceptual level, and think it can be perfectly healthy for certain people. I think it mostly comes down to how you're wired, it's not something people should necessarily try for the sake of trying, monogamy suits most people just fine.
That said, I do see the appeal of swinging, which is something I could potentially see being open to. But that's not sharing your partner with other people, it's sharing an experience with your partner. But it's similar enough that maybe I have a leg up in feeling like full on polyamory isn't too crazy.
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How much do I spend on my 1 month gf for Christmas?
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>>20327296
>Do men have a smaller dating pool than women?

If you think of it from a logistics standpoint: No.

In fact, there's an argument to be made that because of social standards, men have a larger dating pool than women.

The average man's potential dating pool is basically every woman he can see. If he can interact with her, he can flirt with/hit on/ask her out.

The average woman's dating pool however, tends to be limited to basically friends of friends or acquaintances. Why? Both because women are taught to take a more passive/submissive role when it comes to romance, and because there's also a safety element that comes in to play (because rape/murder *does* happen).

Stuff like online makes it seem like women have a larger dating pool, but the online dating community is still minuscule compared to the amount of people who meet in real life.
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>>20327261
I'm in one, but an actual stable one. We are 3 people in it, and I love it, because it fixes my main issue with relationships.

I'm a girl, mostly gay, probably 80/20, and I am not so good at social anything. Family hates me for admitting to being gay, and I don't do well under social pressure. I dated a girl, and due to both of our families being STRONGLY against gays, we never told her family. Instead, we found a guy.

So basically, they are officially engaged, not yet married, they go to the birthdays and stuff, I go along to both as the "friend" when I want to (which is not all that often, i don't like social gatherings), and on paper, we are all financially dependant, similar to a marriage. Our country allows it, but it isn't public information, so we mostly go under the radar, and we work out really well. He loves having two girls, the other girl loves having both, they both satisfy their very high demand for attention, and I'm happy about avoiding a lot of the taxing social expectations that comes with a regular relationship. Win-win-win.

It probably requires a group of 3 very specific people, but it can definitely work.
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>>20327276
Fucking christ stop posting. You are ANNOYING. This is why no girl likes you. You are the most annoying fuckhead on the planet. Learn to shut up. Nobody wants to her your nonstop whining.
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>>20326221
girls...
is crossdressing cute?
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>>20327321
Being annoying has nothing to do with how you actually look
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>>20327180
stop stealing my ellipsis you stupid fucking halfie faggot
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>>20327326
No.
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>>20327329
I’m not a halfie...
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>>20327303
what time period you want to live in bro? ... you sound like some houellebecq character lol faggot
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>>20327296
Women don't want relationships as much as we do, so our dating pool is effectively smaller.
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>>20327343
Anytime before internet apps like tinder existed... in less superficial times
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>>20327180
Send a side profile pic with a good lighting and no camera distortion if you want a more scientific rating.
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Why does my phone not let me see the red boards? I can only see the blue boards! Help
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>>20327330
do u think it comes down to preference or that it's some pathological thing? I've seen lots of girls act like it's cute, but they tend to be a specific type of girl; the bisexual type who seems to be looking for a non-threatening male possibly out of some fear of masculinity... like theyve rejected the performative perks of being an adult female in a desire to stick to childhood do u think this explanation works?
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>>20327353
>>20327180
And btw you can "fix" your looks a little bit but it will be harder since your bones stopped growing already it's not 100% genes while you still alive.
Check this vid and this channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqlxAdmky10
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>>20327353
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>>20327356
idk what you just said but cross dressing is definitely weird.
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Bump >>20327162

>>20327247
I can't find any. It's always dancing, nightclubs, traveling, smoking weed...
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>>20327373
I'm saying girls liking crossdressing is a corollary to their preferring feminine, boy-like males of who's unrealized secondary sex characteristics they would find threatening had they been more pronounced...
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>>20327363
The sad part is I always assumed my looks were fine and didn’t need “fixing” I literally thought I was good looking and plenty of girls would respond to me... girls won’t even give me a chance tho and life is moving on too fast and I’m missing living my life the way I want to...
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>>20327186
This person sounds very thoughtful
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I have a challenge for you:
Prove the existence of homebody girls. (Pro-tip: you can't)
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>>20327326
Very.

A guy who can actually pull it off, is literally the hottest fantasy I have.
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>>20327345
Blatantly false. Women want relationships way more than men do.

Men want sex more than women do. I think you are mixing up the two.
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>>20326255
I'm not a samefag. I'm not scared of wearing my trip.
>>20326275
You wont, because LH an I are both too mature for that.
But don't equate me to LH. He leads a much better/different life than I do.

>>20326362
It's because men and women are different. We're a sexed species. Women are selectors, men are competitors. Your sexual value as a man is determined by how well you can compete, your sexual value as a woman is determined by how well you can select.

This becomes hard to understand if you deny reality and pretend that men and women are equal.

>>20327261
It's not really a relationship at that point, it's just our base animal desires.
Like at one point in history, we evolved out of being animals, learning to control our impulses. But some people prefer to turn their back to their gift of humanity and give in to these basic impulses.
Nonetheless, I'm really open minded and would be perfectly happy in one of these relationships.
It's most likely this is what relationships will look like in the future, if we reach a point of resource abundance and communism. This will allow women to be the most free and share the finest men, thus evolutionarily advancing our species faster than pair-bonded marriages.
>can't wrap my head around if there's a huge possibility that one of the partners will feel unwanted, jealous, [...]
These people have learned to fight their ego. It's hard for normal people to understand, it's like you're putting up a risk or giving something away for free. That's when the ego normally steps in and gives you all these bad feelings. But if you arrest your ego, then relationships like this are easy.
Most often (from my experience) these people are racially white, super altruistic personality, and killed their ego with LSD.

>>20327296
Great men have more dating options than women, normal men have less.
I'm beautiful and successful and it's hard to fine a woman who wants something serious.
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>>20327408
Can you answer my question too?
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>>20327314
I wish to be this guy.
How?
Mad rich? Tall? 8x6?
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>>20327411
fuck off shes mine
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>>20327408
hey babe what do u think about my lil analysis of the trend >>20327382 do u think it holds any weight
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>>20327412
Liberal.

Hang out wherever hipsters are found.
>Mad rich? Tall? 8x6?
Optional, but wouldn't hurt. The one trait I've observed about these men is exceptionally high intelligence.
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>>20327328
Being the most annoying planet is 100% the reason girls don't like you. Or why no one likes you. Why can you not understand this?
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>>20327412
You will be disappointed when she reveals the answer is none of those, you pathetic excuse-making incel.
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>>20327409
>Date grill
>Fool around
>Like her a lot, dote on her,
> ask to be my gf
>Lol ur great but we should be FWB, isn't that every guys dream?
>Still fool around but I am actively hardening my heart knowing she's just using me as Mr Right now while she looks to upgrade
>No more doting, no more taking her out my treat, no more cuddling. before if she had said she wanted something I'd gladly get it, now it's "cool get me one too"
>Now she's totally into me and wants to be gf bf but that ship has flown
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>>20326362
social customs notwithstanding girls are in a freudian hysteria of sorts lol they're all thirsty bitches deep down inside aint nothing gonna change this it's because they view everything thru a more or less self-aware lens in short they're horny babies lol they've only donned certain socially acceptable appearances for the sake of improving their odds... this perhaps not at the conscious level but basically what I'm saying is that every lil decision of chastity & purity made by a woman is ultimately driven by her perineum.
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>>20327423
Charismatic or several other metrics would explain it too. I'm mostly wondering what set this one above the million others.
Why the projection and vitrol btw?
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If a guy says he feels close to you emotionally it means you are just there to deal with his emotions and that he doesn't like you, right?
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>>20327410
>He leads a much better life than I do.
Yeah most people do. You don't set the bar very high.
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>>20327180

You aren't ugly but maybe you need to move to where people like your look. I'm plain in some countries and hot in others.

You also have zero confidence which is extremely unattractive. If you don't like yourself and believe in yourself no one else will. And you post here so much that you are going to get a reputation and nobody will want that weird dude on 4chan so stop.
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>>20327445
Maybe
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>>20327445
Personally, I wouldn't be dumb enough to say or do that unless I was blinded by how much I like her.
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>>20327457

He would always indicate he liked me but never would officially date me. Needed to know how I feel.

Guys are mean. This is why I can't really trust them.
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>>20326703
The cost of rejection is literally nothing though.
Like nigga just shrug and walk away.
Not exactly sure what kind of advice you are looking for, but sounds to me like you are trying to rationalize your fear of approaching and rejection.
The only way to get over that is to pick up your balls and just do it.
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>>20327459
Did you ask him on a date and he said no?
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>>20327463
I'm just asking what the odds are that I can get at least one relationship in my lifetime if I don't bother asking girls out.
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>>20327474
Zero unless you are Chad or willing to date a landwhale
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>>20327372
>>20327388
You are looking up so I don't think it's that precise but looking from that you have attractive traits like forward facial growth, good chin and jawline, your maxilla bone (marked with red) could be more compact though.
Look the pic of the first guy, here everything connects, other things also makes some difference too like hooded eyes, hollow cheeks, cheek bones and symmetry.
Like you said, you're not in bad position in terms of looks, but you're not good looking enough for girls to have a urge of hitting you up first, on dating sites it's all about selling yourself though, I've seen ugly/average dudes getting matches just because they knew how to sell themselves which is the part I think you are forgetting and is probably also why you not having much success.
With women just having to sit and swipe right or left just to find a 7/10+ makes it harder for average guys to actually be average.
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>>20327309
No one?
Like should I spend around 30 bucks or a hundred bucks?
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>>20327497
How much are the earmuffs?
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>>20327500
Huh??
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>>20327465

No we dated for a little while.
He hasn't said he didn't like me it's just that he wouldn't even try to keep it going out of fear but won't let me go either. Like it's a game to him. He's really emotional. I like him and I said that but I can't handle this mess. I don't know anymore I just want to have a solid answer and way to feel and stability but I can't have that. He has all the control over me in the end. I constanty go between hating him and feeling depressed and loving him and feeling excited and not caring and feeling nothing.
>>
>>20327508
>>20326236 it was just a joke.
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>>20327512
>He's really emotional.
Bail.
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>>20327445
Um, no? You're likely wrong

Why is your impulse to assume malevolent intent?

>>20327452
My life is very good, successful, and moral; and has been the past several years.

>>20327474
Extraordinarily low.

>>20327459
Maybe I missed something, but how is that mean? He was very honest and forward with his feelings afaict

>>20327512
>I just want to have a solid answer
If you want stability from an unstable person, you're looking in the wrong place.
>I constanty go between hating him [...] and loving him
This is a very big deal to men. If you're not giving him any stability in your feelings, then how can you reasonably expect it from him?
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>>20327534
>moral
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>>20327544
Like I said, for the past several years I've been living an excellent life.

My troubled past happened a long time ago. I'm 27 now. A lot can change in 10 years.
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>>20327546
I believe that if you didn't spend an entire thread arguing that it's perfectly fine to punch cats.
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>>20327534

It doesn't matter how I feel or what I do.
He does whatever he wants.
If I write to him he reads it and doesn't reply. He won't talk to me or go away. I don't know how to feel because he is this way. I want everything to work out but have a fear it won't and a lack of confidence in goong through hell again. But if I had someone with me I would try. I don't know what to do. However I explain my problem here people just tell me I can't do anything or feel any way. It doesn't help me.
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>>20327546
You're still an incel who has never kissed a girl.
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>>20327558
You want advice?
Block him on everything and ignore him so you can start to move on.
Of course you will ignore this or worse make excuses, but it's the only way to not stay in the endless loop you are in.
>>
So like, I'm going on a 2nd date with this girl tonight but we've been talking for like a month, with all the stuff going on out there, is it mandatory to ask to kiss now? I'm semi recently out of a 3 year relationship and it wasn't an issue then
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>>20327562
Nah he worse. Incels haven't had the chance to be abusive yet.
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>>20327553
You're misrepresenting me. If you're going to attack my character, at least do it with honesty.

>>20327558
I see. You really do what this to work.
If he's doing these things, there is likely a reason for it. I feel like he's pretty honest with you, but he's scared to tell you some things. This is because when I read your posts, you focus only on yourself and your needs, your fears and what you want, and how you depend on him (or others) to feel good about yourself. It's almost codependent.
So my advice here, if you want it to work between you guys, is to really listen to him. Try to shutdown your judgment for a while and allow him to tell you everything that's wrong. Some things he says might hurt your feelings, but it's his reality and you must accept it. He might ask for a lot from you, or maybe a little. Be prepared for anything and just listen to him. Try to focus your attention on him instead for a while and push down your needs. I think when you do this, it'll enable you to bond and communication will flow better. With better flow, you have better problem solving.
I know it's hard to put yourself in someone else's shoes, especially when you have many needs of your own, but if you are both only focusing on yourself, then how can you ever help each other? You feel what I'm saying?
I'm not judging you. I really do think your needs and feelings are valid. I'm trying to help you get what you want, just, I don't think it's easy. It'll take some strength for a while.
>>
I'm hanging out with a guy friend tomorrow on what I think is supposed to be a date. His ex-gf sent me a pic of his cock and it's surprisingly small, should I tell him about getting sent it? He's way out of my league physically and I don't wan't to mess up my chance with him.
>>
>>20327580
I'm so glad I don't live in your reality. Nobody would ever be understood or get second chances. I may have a stained past, but I really embrace what it means to be human and see the best in others.
>>
>>20327591
>do it with honesty
>Said the man that used a PragerU video as the foundation of his argument.
Nah I'm good.
>>
>>20327596
>I really embrace what it means to be human and see the best in others.
There's nothing virtuous about refusing to see people as they truly are.
>>
>>20327572

I can't really block. He has secret accounts anyway. I didn't even know it was him for a long time. And it's not a public social media, it's a language site that I cannot make another account so I can't even sign up again. Still an excuse ai guess..
>>
>>20327546
You still advocate animal abuse and excuse violence towards women though
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>>20327595
He'll appreciate knowing, it would only build trust to tell him. But you don't have to say too much and you can use tact of course.
"Your ex-gf messaged me. I think she's jealous that we're going out"
Or you can ask if they had a bad breakup or something. When he says yeah, you can laugh and tell him about the message then compliment him that he's not with the crazy witch anymore.

>>20327597
>>20327600
You guys are real rascals you know? I think I'm going to start ignoring posts like these, unless they're constructive and honest
>>
>>20327608
see:
>>20324516
>I don't advocate hitting animals.

Seriously you guys are rascals
>>
>>20327595
I'd not mention it.
Also what a vindictive bitch that ex is.
Did the pic put you off like she wanted?
Did knowing her and her character?
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>>20327595
>surprisingly small
how small?
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>>20327605
Just ignore then
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>>20327613
I'm thinking that it's worse if she doesn't tell him. Because if she hides it for a while. Then weeks later after they're seriously dating he finds out from someone, he'll feel his trust is violated. She sort of has an obligation to tell him, but she doesn't need to be explicit. Just treat him as you would want to be treated.
I mean wouldn't you want to know? If the situation was reversed?
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>>20327612
Oh sorry, my bad, you encourage animal abuse under a paper-thin pretense
Anyway, do you hit kids too? Or do you draw the line at women and barking dogs?
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>>20327609
I'll tell him she messaged me but only tell him what it was if he asks.
>>20327613
It didn't put me off at all, it looks cute. She does seem crazy or a bit unstable.
>>20327614
About an inch and a half or two inches, but he wasn't hard in the pic so I don't know for sure.
>>
>>20327591

What you say is something I have realized time and time again. I grew up a bit traumatized and battling mental disorders like anxiety and depression.

As well we did have the kinda talks you mention and I think neither of us handled it well. There were legal issues and threats from people in our lives from ex partners, and in addition to my extreme stress and suicidal thoughts, he was also going through that. So while I do understand mostly his situation, I'm just at a loss to right now. I don't know what is happening anymore and how I should process it. I am coping my best.. but I get lost in thinking about it too much. Just knowing that anything I have said and will say he will read and I don't know how he feels about it, makes me feel kinda confused and vulnerable.

I keep coming back here because my other journal was my sanctuary and he's there so I have nowhere else to process my emotions.
>>
>>20327616
You're right.
I was mostly thinking about her saying "hey bro I saw ur piece, it's no big... I mean no big deal" before they even went on a date.
That would throw me off kilter pretty bad
>>
>>20327609
>You guys are real rascals you know?
Man I'm starting to get bored because I can just come back with "at least I don't abuse animals or hit women" to anything you say.
Anywho, I'll stop shitposting if you stop making excuses for behaviour that even Hitler (both the real one and the tripfag) would be revolted by.
>>
>>20327625
>he wasn't hard in the pic so I don't know for sure.
It means nothing then. I'm like 3" soft but more than 7" hard.
I think you should tell him just so he knows.
>>
>>20327595
She could be trolling you.
>>
>>20327580
Why is it that every tripfagging incel on /adv/ is a violent psychopath who is just waiting to pull an Elliot?
>>
>>20327626
Another piece of advice I can offer is changing your approach. Your starting point in all of these problems derives from desperation, rather than power.
Some things are out of your control. Just a fact. Happens to me too. It's normal to feel hurt, but at some point you have to let go of things you can't control and focus on what you can.
So like, in your situation it's very tough. Many things are going wrong and you have little power over most of it. These things don't deserve so much of your headspace. Instead, take the few things you do have power over and make the best of them. Try and catch yourself when you get tangled in a hopeless thought. When you realize there's nothing you can do, start thinking about something you can control, even if it's small.
Once you make this a habit, then your feeling of desperation will start to melt, perhaps you'll fell less depressed and suicidal, and you'll reclaimed control of your life again. Granted not everything, don't expect perfection, but it's a much better approach.

>>20327625
Cool very good.
Btw most men's penis is superrrr tiny when we're flaccid. I mean like Michelangelo level small. But when we're hard it grows a good deal. Fact she chose that picture to send you and not an erect one is a good sign.

>>20327635
I never made excuses. I took full responsibility for my actions years ago, apologized to all affected parties and even took a trip to Sweden to apologize to one girl in-person. Somehow you missed all of this, but it's all done and I've moved on with my life. That's why you don't see me still wallowing about and upset by it. It's really good to be forgiven and to have fought a demon in your head and won.
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>>20327645
Okay. I'll be gentle when I tell him.
>>20327654
There was more than one pic and they had his face in one.
>>
>>20327412
>I wish to be this guy.
You'd be surprised to learn how many guys we approached, who didn't even want to consider it beyond a quick one-time threesome. It's not even like we are unattractive (hell, the other girl is likely a 9/10, even if I'm probably a lot lower than that)
>How?
We wanted a third part, looked around for a long time, and finally found one who fit the bill.
>Mad rich?
Nope.
>Tall?
Nah.
>8x6?
What? He is lithe, but not really "jacked" in the way a usual bodybuilder is.

You focus too much on appearance. Trust me when I say, the kind of guy who fits into this, isn't common enough to have appearance factor in in any significant way. He isn't bad, 7/10 probably (seen through the eyes of a mostly gay girl, mind you), but it takes a very special kind of mentality to be able to do this sort of thing. I know I'm the one people call the "neglected" one, and that's by choice and my own wishes. Don't count on finding a lot of my kind, either.
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>>20327382
Your word salad aside, the main draw is actually to have a man who can fuck me silly, while still looking like a girl. The insane disconnect is just super thrilling to me for some reason.
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>>20327612
>hiss
>perfectly valid to smash it's face in
So if another human sneers or yells at you, you also feel justified in physically assaulting them?
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>>20327658
>I never made excuses.
>So you can say he overreacted all day long. Totally fine, because that's your opinion. However he was well within his rights to do [punch his girlfriend's cat in the face because it made a noise he didn't like].
What would you call this then?
>>
>>20327658

I've been trying. I know this already but maybe need to hear it from others
Maybe it's just a longer process than I thought when things kept going wrong for me and it got harder to keep fighting. Anyway I have great opportunities now and I am happy about them.

I'll do what I can.
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>>20327661
>8x6?
>What?
I think he meant dick size.
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>>20327656
It's just Literally Hitler and Peanut Butter and out of these two PB is far more likely to do some bad shit like snapping and beating up his gf to death
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>>20327661
You're the one with the experience so you know, but I cannot fathom saying no to this, outside of my worry that one party would see themselves getting less attention and be mad about it, or maybe me worrying about who should be in the middle of spooning after
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>>20327680
>I think he meant dick size
Oh lol, I don't know, average I think. Doesn't look or feel too big/small, so I never paid enough attention to it.
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>>20327658
>I never made excuses.
>beating up women in Ukraine is totally normal, people even joke about that and women don't mind

Care to explain?
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>>20327682
>You're the one with the experience so you know, but I cannot fathom saying no to this
I thought it would be super easy at first top. But usually, it's
"HOLYSHIT yes."
Then we talk a bit more, and like a minute or two in, it's
>wait, no, I don't want this
The problem is it isn't just a one time sex thing. It's a permanent relationship, and I think (Not sure) that a lot of guys Instantly think it sounds good, but then start imagining not 1 wife, but two, and then they panic.

>Outside of my worry that one party would see themselves getting less attention and be mad about it, or maybe me worrying about who should be in the middle of spooning after
We had a pretty clear understanding of that before even looking. While we do all pay attention to each other, the other girl is the "main character", so to speak. Im mostly interested in her, and he is also most interested in her, and that's the preferred and ideal situation.
>>
I really love eating my girl out and have only recently started to relax enough around her to enjoy her giving me oral sex (we've had sex like rabbits and are very compatible), I think it's psychological. I don't like the idea of my cum on her face or in her mouth I think because I find it degrading, but she really wants to blow me till orgasm one day. She's all but stated she wants to and I think she feels guilt because I'm so good at making her cum that she wants to do something for me that's more in her hands without my involvement.

What do I do? How do I get over it?
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>>20327671
I made that clear in the thread. See >>20324696

>>20327674
Self-defense.
The animal was unprovoked and aggressive. See >>20325084

>>20327675
I wish you the best anonette

>>20327686
Of course. He said spousal abuse is not normal and he asserted that no normal person would ever do it. I wasn't excusing my own behavior, but defeating his point. Depending on how you define "normal" it's actually quite normal in some nations to hit women, and people don't care.

Doesn't mean I want to do it. But you can't say it's not normal. Like you can't sit on a moral high-horse and talk about how awesome humanity is when it's not.
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>>20327709
Let her give you a hand job with your eyes closed and then have her suck your dick at the last second.
>>
How do I deal with girls who have wild texting habits?
I'm talking to someone right now who will waver between big paragraphs to a single word reply which kills the conversation and I essentially have to bring something else up to keep it going.
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>>20327698
So if she's not around, you and the guy never smash, ur just like roommates? Also how does it work if there's an argument, do 2 ppl team up on the other? Feels like an easy chance for jealousy to pop up
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>>20327713
The animal wasn't unprovoked. A stranger entered cats territory, that is enough to trigger hissing. Punching a cat for being a cat is a needless violence when you can just shove it or even verbally scare it away. But you like to hit dogs and cats and women, so I assume words like needless violence beyond your understanding.
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>>20327732
I would love to have this discussion with you, just do me a favor and keep it in the thread ok?

Also I think you'll find I already responded to that idea from another anon in the thread. give it a look.
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>>20327732
>>20327737
Quit eating up bump limit I'm tryna read about lesbians
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>>20327713
iirc the anon said that good people wouldn't even think about hitting their women or animals and you brought up some 3rd world shithole just to illustrate that abusing women isn't that bad
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>>20327665
got a boner at this post
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>>20326221

At a work party a hot girl dragged me (I am not the greatest dancer) to dance the whole night with her, flirted a lot (both tipsy...) only to tell me at the end that she has a partner and "I have to go, sorry"
...why would she do that?
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>>20327625
I’m like an inch and a half to two inches soft, to around 7 inches hard. lol never judge a book by its cover
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>>20327795
She wants you as a beta orbiter.
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I'm >>20317544
Should I go ahead and text her and ask her if I did something wrong?
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>>20327709
What's degrading about semen but not about using her body for pleasure? What's wrong with choosing to be degraded during sex in an otherwise healthy relationship? Whether it's because you enjoy the particular act, degradation, or pleasing? Do you feel like you'd be treating her wrong, or do you not like the idea of her having done that, or of her wanting it? Maybe you feel selfish, but if she wants it she's probably going to enjoy it.
If it's this big of a deal in your mind maybe that's just how it is, but if you ask me you should loosen up. Relax, lie back, close your eyes, enjoy a top-tier orgasm if she's decent, and if you're lucky she'll like the taste. What's to lose?
>>
Why do (some) women expect me to enjoy calling them sluts/whores and pulling their hair and shit? Like if I wanted that we could just be platonic friends and I'd just go see an actual whore. I'm in a relationship because I want sex with someone you care about.
On second thought a prostitute probably wouldn't ask me to do any weird stuff so that might be better.
Anyway, what's up with that?
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>>20328086
Because some men enjoy this degeneracy
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>>20327729
>So if she's not around, you and the guy never smash, ur just like roommates?
No, we generally just go at it. As I said, I'm about 80% gay if that makes sense, I wouldn't normally go for a guy, but I do really love him. It does happen from time to time, and well, we used toys before he joined the picture, dick isn't much different to a strap on (well, it is, but not to the point where I don't want it if she is out on the rare business trip required by her work.)
>Also how does it work if there's an argument, do 2 ppl team up on the other? Feels like an easy chance for jealousy to pop up
We handle it like adults, and talk it through, with one acting as mediator. It's literally easier to solve this when we are 3 than we are 2.

They hog most of the attention, and if they feel like getting jealous, they grab each other to get what they want.

I don't care enough, to be honest. I'm probably not normal though, but I like some quiet and alone time every once in a while.
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>>20328086
See >>20328018
You can care enormously about someone who likes degradation during sex. That's a big part of why you give it to them. Do you not want her to enjoy it? Explains the desire for a prostitute.
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>>20328088
That doesn't seem like a very good answer.
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>>20327180
Your problem is your obsession with getting a gf
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>>20328117
But it is. Male brainlets consume pornography, they develop unhealthy fetishes and their perception of sex becomes skewed. Women are naturally submissive and want to please men, so they adapt. BDSM and daddy shit is so normalized today, even in mainstream media & popculture, that women think it's a sexual must have. Basically they think YOU like slapping and name calling, and trying to be good gfs, try to give you what they assume will make you happy.
>>
So last week I met someone off of tinder. Things were going well through messages. We then went out for a movie and then a diner and had a good time with each other until I took her home. She expressed that she enjoyed it and was eager to do something else in the coming days. They wanted my arm around them in the film which was nice, and we kissed a bit in the car and when I dropped her off at home.

So after that, the volume of texts went down. She last engaged with my on sunday when, when I texted a further inquiry to that she didn't respond. I then held off texting again until yesterday where I asked what she was doing. So we're here, with still no text since a status on Sunday.

It seems clear they should have texted back with any interest by now. What I'm not understanding is why would they not want to engage more to plan something after being exited to on our date? Is there anything I could possibly text now to re-engage? From an opposite perspective I wouldn't feel motivated to respond to an additional text after not engaging for five days. Would a phone call be appropriate? Could I still just offer plans for this weekend?

So I'm wondering if for sure there's no interest here. Would it be an alright final message to say something like "Hey it seems like you don't want to go out again and that's alright, but I'd like if you'd just told me through silence, anyway take care." It's really hard for me to just leave it at nothing, would something like this or similar be ok?
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>>20328136
Some people are turned on by satisfying their partners. The most degenerate fetish of all. It's the gift that keeps on giving though because you pick up so many new fetishes.
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>>20327928
bump
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>>20328094
Sounds pretty comfy.
I really like some alone time on occasion
You the only one that comes on this site?
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>>20327116
Thanks. I don’t even know how I can make her believe I am being genuine. She always told me that I need to be better at being myself but recently (past few months since we have had problems) every time I have been she thinks I am faking it.
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Pepper spray or a rape alarm as a gift? She isn't afraid of walking her dog at night and I don't want her to get raped. She carries a pocket knife already
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>>20326881
Bump
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>>20328178
Pepper spray is more generally useful because you can use it to fend off things like dog attacks, but it's also more likely to get her in trouble for concealed weaponry. Check out the laws for that in your/her area.
>>
>>20328231
Found the Brit
'Ave ya got a loiscence fer that shitpost then guv?
>>
>been dating this girl for 4 months
>everything seemed to be okay
>last saw her last thursday
>she calls me Tuesday saying shes in a bad emotional place and we shouldnt date anymore and doesnt give any more info

what do you think? she's been pretty honest the whole time we dated but to pull a "its not you its me" line out of the blue seemed odd
>>
>>20327180
honestly it's your attitude what's putting me off even through a fucking 4chan post. you're fine physically
>>
Can a girl tell me if I fucked up?

I lied to a girl I'm dating that I can drive and have a driving license while I'm actually trying to learn right now but I told her out of guilt and now she won't talk to me for the sheer fact that I've been lying to her for months.
>>
>>20328344
Of course you fucked up, but she is fucking up by giving you a silent treatment instead of telling you that she doesn't want to be with a liar because that implies low self esteem issues, dishonesty and being unreliable and untrustworthy. Then she should just block your ass and move on.
>>
>>20328316
Could be that she is in a bad emotional place and you shouldn't date anymore because of that. It's not odd that you don't believe these words straight up and try to look for something hidden behind them, but that's an irrational defense mechanism against loss speaking. Better to resolve to take her at her word than try and fix a problem you have no control over nor information to analyze properly. Chill.
>>
>>20328344 as a girl, that was a dumb lie. but she’ll probably get over it soon. it’s harmless. whatever. just don’t lie about small stuff in the future. it just sets yourself up for situations that suck
>>
>>20328344
i'm a dude and i know you fucked up, that's how you know you really fucked up. we dudes like to say oh it wasn't important it's not like i was unfaithful i just wanted her to be happier/excited/interested/whatever. girls don't fuck with that bullshit.
i hate to say this to you man but you might have fucked up so hard that even if she takes you back it's never going to be quite the same. it might be "small" but the duration and consistency really ups the ante.
>>
>>20328353
I mean it doesnt really matter anymore, we're not dating and unless she calls me up and say "im better lets date again" i dont expect to ever speak to her again. Just trying to figure out what happened.
>>
>>20328359
This anon is right.

Men who tell small lies are worse than the ones who tell big ones because it took less temptation for them to commit evil.
"If *that's* all it took to make him lie, then what else will he lie about? Does he really love me when he says he does?"
You've tapped into one of her female primal fears. It's very deep in women's instincts she can't control it.
>>
>>20328159
>You the only one that comes on this site?
To my knowledge, yeah.

The other girl knows of this site, but her general opinion is that "it takes too much time to watch and participate in a thread", which is pretty on point honestly. She is a bit too social to have enough time to waste here.

I'm the only one who likes to waste time on pointless stuff, and is asocial enough to make it possible.
>>
Is it weird I like watching my boyfriend pee? Like I like seeing him hold his penis, shake the drops off, wash under his foreskin etc.
>>
I’m really good friends with this girl. There’s been some moments of uhh tension between us but we both kinda ignored them. About a week ago she was drunk at a party or something and started texting me apologizing for something.

I asked what about later and she shrugged it off. I figured she didn’t wanna talk about it, sleeping dogs etc.

Thing is before that she was acting odd for a bit. Then after that day she really hasn’t been normal at all. She hasn’t been in touch with me really. It’s finals and I know she’s busy but something is definitely off.

Is there anything to say to her? I feel like she is upset with me or something.
>>
>>20328474
Doesn't seem to be an uncommon fetish on either side, but maybe you get a better view. I'm fairly indifferent about piss but I'm really into being able to see all of someone's body whenever I want, and to watch them do anything I choose. Possessive and voyeuristic.
>>
>>20328474
Do guys wash under foreskin after every pee? I'm confused
>>
>>20328539
No, I only see him do it before we have sex.
>>
>>20328546
Does he know you like it? Would be a sad story if he didn't.
>>
>>20328456
I'm not sure if I just got dunked on.
I don't think ten minutes when I get up and a few times at work during break is too bad, but I do get it.
I guess she doesn't get that dopamine hit from a funny post or from a (you) the same as I don't get it from a like or a post on Facebook.
>>
>>20328627
He does. He's let me hold his penis for him while he'd peed before.
>>
A girl texted me for the first time after asking for my number. She just said "Heyy". What does that mean, and how should I respond?
>>
>tfw no one accepts my challenge
>>20327404
>>
>>20328647
That's cute to be honest, he sounds lucky.
>>
>>20328667
As long as you're in the two or more y's zone, you're still in there. Go with the classic "Hey what's up" and then you're on your own gotta feel it out.
>>
What would be the best way to tell my sister I'd prefer her to eventually marry someone that's our race? FYI she's 19 and has yet to show any interest in men
>>
Tips for amazing sex? Guy btw
>>
>>20328707
Honesty is the best policy.

Her first question will be "why?" just be prepared to answer that. Tell her all the reasons it will benefit her, and her children.
>>
>>20328719
I don't want my nieces/nephews to look like goblins or become school shooters
>>
>>20328724
Ok that's great. You're going to have to tell her this and show how it'll benefit her. If you just talk about how it benefits you , then she won't listen.
>>
>>20328667
It means she said hi, now say hi back but start a conversation. Get to know her and arrange a date if that's what you want.
>>
>>20328743
I would assume that not having children that look like goblins or become school shooters would be a benefit for the parent
>>
>>20328707
Absolutely trippin. I want to see that conversation.
>>
>>20328116
I was just asking why they like it.
>See >>20328018 #
Blowjobs aren't inherently degrading the same way being called a whore is, and the appeal is much easier for me to wrap my head around.
>Do you not want her to enjoy it?
Obviously I do, but I wouldn't let a chick peg me no matter how much she enjoys it. You don't have to be down for everything.
>Explains the desire for a prostitute.
That was a joke you gayboi.

>>20328136
>Basically they think YOU like slapping and name calling, and trying to be good gfs, try to give you what they assume will make you happy.
Then why can't they take "I'm not into that" as an answer instead of acting like I should enjoy it?
>>
When do you know that you love your SO? When should you express it?
I'm a 24yo male in a 6 month relationship with a girl of the same age. I'm pretty inexperienced in relationships (this is only my 2nd LTR ever, while she has a few more under her belt).
I think I'm in love with her, but I don't know if it's actually love or infatuation.
Also, if it actually is love, I don't know if I should be the first to express it.
On one hand I wanna take charge,express confidence, dive in and just say it. On the other hand, I was more into her in the start (I was clearly infatuated and excited for the new relationship but I did my best to take it slow). She's come around in the past couple of months by a huge margin, but I don't wanna ruin it and seem clingy by rushing in to such an extent. Also, I'm a bit weary if she doesn't reciprocate.
Wat do?
>>
>>20328755
I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic right now. But if not , I want to give you some broad advice. Forget your sister for a moment, but when you talk to other people, really start to consider their thoughts, feelings and ego. Put yourself in other's shoes more.
>>
https://youtu.be/vwbKYcBdVyk
how accurate is this?
>>
>>20328805
I'm 100% serious
>>
>>20328775
>I was just asking why they like it.
Who knows, I don't know why I like giving it.
>Blowjobs aren't inherently degrading the same way
Someone seemed to think they were pretty fucking degrading but I was referring to the general sentiment, if hair pulling makes them wet maybe give it a shot you might like the response. I did.
>You don't have to be down for everything.
Absolutely, but...
>Then why can't they take "I'm not into that" as an answer instead of acting like I should enjoy it?
People who like kinky sex can feel unsatisfied being with someone who isn't. Natural to want to push a little. It can absolutely be a legitimate dealbreaker the same way some people can't handle a sexless relationship.
>>
>>20328724
Out of curiosity what race are we keeping to that you think is less likely to become a school shooter?
>>
>>20328806
The thing is, appearance is both physical attributes, but also your act.

You can look like a physical God of beauty, and still be perceived as a 6/10 If you give off a vibe of negativity, insecurity and self esteem issues, you slouch, and generally seem unapproachable for all the wrong reasons.

A 5/10 can come off as an 8/10 if he appears super confident, is social and easily approachable, and gives a strong sense of positivity and certainty.

And guess what, a crazy girl(or guy for that matter) tends to have a far easier time acting as the second part. It is why sociopaths tend to be extremely good at getting girls, because they are unreasonably confident in themselves, and it shows. It is also often evident in women due to how much clothing affects the attractiveness. A regular girl might feel uncomfortable about really sexy clothing, where a crazy one wouldn't, so they would wear something insane, and not seem at all bothered by it, further enhancing their looks.

Remember though: Crazy has a tendency to lead to a girl being more hot, but being hot doesn't mean a girl is crazy. Could just be good genes and proper maintenance of herself.
>>
>>20328851
Statistically speaking, it's likely a European afraid of mixing in white American blood.
>europe has countries with 0 school shootings for 20+ years
Makes sense to me.
>>
>>20328897
Just asked because statistically speaking there are a lot of wrong answers.
>>
Am i frienzoned?

>Girl is my skipper's licence instructor
>Ask her to come out with my friends a few times, she couldn't come
>She tells me she's free for a coffee next day
>We go out, we have good chemistry, nice convos, i make her laugh
>We go out a few times , half i ask her out half she does
>She likes being with me (wouldn't ask me out otherwise i guess) but i can't escalate, she is kinda shy and doesnt touch me, i tried to break the touch barrier today but i just touched her arm a bit

Well she wouldn't want to go out with me just the two of us if i was completely friendzoned, right? Im thinking of asking her out for a movie tommorow and try to make it so we watch a movie at my place or mine and make moves there.
>>
>>20328987
>but i just touched her arm a bit
Please do tell.
Has there been any clear indication that you are going out as anything other than friends hanging out?
>>
I can't date because girls don't let me. :c
>>
>>20329007
Well no. Tbh i had 3 gfs before her and never once did i do the whole 'like a girl ask her out' shit, it just happened without me taking them out. I'm new to this. I don't have female friends that i do stuff with, only girls that are in my social groups.

I really think she is shy though. She just moved here, doesn't have a lot of friends and even though she is very pretty she doesn't dress nicely or even put on makeup, she is the sporty tomboy type.

So yeah i woudn't know about 'clear indication of just friends'.
>>
This girl just started texting me. How do I make the conversation more interesting/flirty? I want to keep things subtle and light, but I was in a ltr for so long, I don't remember how to text girls
>>
Hopefully this doesnt violate the rules however...

>a nerdy looking quiet QT from 2 of my classes strikes up conversation with me
>Adds me on social media 2 hours later

She has a boyfriend (2 years) so I purposely avoid liking photos, watching stories and even looking at her

>6 Weeks later she drops me a DM asking for me to go to an event in 2 weeks with her that her "date" aka now ex, was suppose to take her.
>Ask to hangout before event so its not awkward
>I Agree to both and purposely avoid acting interested in what happened to her date or why she choose to ask me.
>We set up date with less that 8 texts.

We hangout and I would give my performance a 5/10. Nothing extremely bad or good. We talk the whole night but nothing too deep. She makes long eye contact, constantly smirking, doesnt say too much about herself and shows no extreme emotions of moods.

Continue 1/2
>>
>Anon you're only doing this because you love me teehee
Why would she say this? Yes, I love her
>>
>>20327795
>At a work party a hot girl dragged me to dance floor

I’m a dude, but if I’d hazard a guess:
For much the same reason straight girls go to gay bars, she was just looking to get a little tispsy, dance a little (girls like dancing), and have a fun night without randoms hitting on or trying t grind on her.

That or maybe she just thought you looked kinda lonley sitting off to yourself in a corner and wanted to get you to be involved/lives up or something.

>>20328474
>Is it weird I like watching my boyfriend pee?

Sorta? It’s not the norm, but judging by the fact that it has its own, sizably popular sector of porn, it’s not like it’s an uncommon fetish. As long as he’s in to it, who cares.
>>
>After date Neither one us text each other, talk to each other in class or even look at each other for a week
>She texts me day before event to make sure it was good
>Go to event

Once again she was nice, smiley, non neurotic, sociable. I was drinking so It was mutual. We go to party afterward and she starts drinking too. Shes obviously fine with me touching her as I had my arms around her waist multiple times and if I remember correctly I was rubbing her legs on the couch that she had hanging over my lap.

>She post picture of us on SM
>Start to black out
>She goes to bed with her friend.
>Invites me to sleep on floor (kek) since the party was going strong and I was falling asleep.
>Next day she texts asking If i had a good time and some other shit and I tell her if you ever want to hang out again, let me know.
>No response
>Realize I need to avoid acting any more interested as this is a bad sign that shes not.

We have talked twice before class but mostly it has been back to no texting, talking or even looking. Which is mutual.

Give it to me straight, I know I am a faggot for the blog post but Wtf is this shit? I have always sealed the deal at this point. Am I friendzoned? I have purposely avoided acting interested the whole time to feel out the situation. Is she playing hard to get too? Autism? Whore? I tried not to get feelings. But now I am curious as I have never had a girl act like this.

2/2
>>
>>20329086
flirting is just bantz m8. tease her, challenge her, take the piss, create some sexual tension, poke a bit of fun at her etc. lighthearted is key
>>
>>20329135
Depends what you're doing doesn't it?
>>
>>20329143
Helping her with some stuff at work
>>
>>20329135
I'm not a girl, but I believe she's prodding you to ask her out.
>>
>>20329146
Wait what is this situation? Are you dating or just colleagues?
>>
>>20329159
>>20329160
Coworkers, but we are pretty close. We banter, touch, stare, wink, talk, joke, etc. We get along well. I indirectly asked her to hang out this weekend but it was a. Not direct and b. Bad timing because she is quite busy
She said " I don't know/I'll let you know"
>>
bump
>>
To the guys:

What is the appeal of sending random women unsolicited pictures of yoru dick? Do you feel like forcing us to see your junk will make us want to sleep with you? Is it an exhibitionism kink thing?



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