Let's talk about our struggles with anxiety in a constructive thread.
Does anyone else ever feel like they're being treated differently because you're anxious? I'm very quiet and can be awkward often because I'm trying to regulate my anxiety. Some people overwhelm me by trying to be too helpful or positive. It's almost insulting at times. I just want to be normal.
I don’t know if I’m really anxious or just get in a rut when I haven’t spoke to people in a few days cause of work and study, but I sometimes feel anxious when I hear people laughing in the living room which is just next to my bed room
>>20322914>Be very confident and funny in big groups>Absoutely sperg one on oneAnyone else do this, too? Sometimes I don't even know what I'm doing wrong. I have an immeasurably hard time putting people I'm talking to at ease unless they're super high energy too. Even then, I feel like I look like I'm trying too hard.
>>20322936People are treated differently for reasons other than their anxiety. The anxious person has to find a way out of their own head, first and foremost. Inside your head is where seemingly innocuous things turn into insurmountable obstacles and slights made against you.
>>20323169You have a need to socialise, like most other human beings. You’re drawn towards the laughter because you know you need it, and pushed away from it by your own insecurities. People want to have fun and feel good most of the time; it’s very rare that someone is actively out to get you or draw attention to your shortcomings.
Why do I feel like I should run away from you? I'm a good damn deer in headlights
>>20322914Saw a very autistic guy at the swimming pool today and realized that's how I must've been perceived by others for all my childhood and most teenage years. And I still am, to a certain degree. My god...
I'm 29. I got on meds this year and HOLY SHIT. Absolutely life changing. It turns out all sorts of things I'd been living with for most of my life are because of my anxiety. Procrastination, self loathing, maladaptive perfectionism, replaying embarrassing/bad memories constantly, racing thoughts, and more wiped out in 3 or 4 weeks with a fucking pill. Pretty much everything is going way better.If you met me on the streets you might confuse me for Chad. There is a down side though, my anxiety ruined most of my 20's. I dropped out of college 2 classes shy of my bachelors because I had a nervous breakdown. I struggled to find work and was unemployed for around 4 years, and basically lived as a recluse. I'm way behind everyone in life. My anxiety killed all of my friendships from college, I'm way behind in my career even though it is getting better, and the biggest thing is I just can't get my love life in order. Dating is so brutal now that I'm actually equipped to do it. In college there were cute girls that I knew were into me but I was too consumed with self loathing and anxiety. Now that I'm free of those things I find myself in an extremely difficult environment where instead of being fun its a Sisyphean task and it breaks my heart that I'm finally out of the fire only to find myself in a frying pan.
>>20322917Mean shit like this just makes me laugh my ass off. You really brighten my day, anon.
>>20322914I often fail to work on projects because it makes me so uncomfortable to imagine failure.
>>20323188I feel sorta similar. It’s like I feel so anxious thinking about what if not saying anything is the problem when it’s one on one that I’d rather just hang with big groups instead
Reminder not to listen to your paranoia bros
One time, I was so nervous for a job interview that I stayed up the entire night, too anxious to sleep.That time was today.
I mask my self-esteem with arrogance and attempts to "improve" myself intellectually.
I'm a schizophrenic and I'm going into town soon with a support worker as they try to build up my confidence and reinsert back into society and I'm shook today because I have voices rn
I feel both inferior and cucked by most people. It's like I don't even have any dignity so I have to compensate with a huge amount of effort or I just have to avoid people entirely. Objectively speaking I really do suck, I just wish it didn't matter. I can't even do normal shit without seeming shitty, if I tried to do good shit I would seem even shittier.
>>20322914Look, if you can get it in your country nom-prescription - there is one thing I recommend. Oxytocin 10ui nasal spray.That has changed my life. Unfortunately in my country its prescriotion only so I have to keep going back to the doctor every couple of months to get more suplly.There are a coulle of suppliers on amazon. Oxyluv is the brand i used.
My doctor prescribed me a low dose on an SSRI(paxil 5mg) for anxiety and the thought of taking it gives me anxiety itself.I thought these things were anti-depressants not for anxiety, I keep reading stories about side effects and it's freaking me out
>>20323664What do you take?
I feel so fucking fragile. When I'm alone, everything is normal and it seems like I can do anything. However the instant I come across someone else it's as if a rock gets thrown into the panes of reality, shattering my logical mind. Every fiber of my being goes into not breaking down completely, but I'm sure those negative emotions leak out. It's why people avoid me, and it's why I avoid myself.Sometimes, though, I can forget the past. Things seem to get better. My relationships and life reflect that. Bright sun breaks through dark clouds and I tell myself that I'll never look back. Then... something traumatic happens. Help isn't there when I need it most. Meanwhile, everyone runs away from me as far as I can push them. I end up at zero point, or even further from goals than before. All I manage to do is isolate myself further to lick the wounds.Fuck it all.
>>20324234I used to be like what you described in the first paragraph. But then I forced myself to get a job where constant social interaction was necessary. It basically caught me up on years of isolating myself and made me way more extroverted. It helped so much that I can no longer stand isolating myself, I seek out social interaction
>>20323929I say just give it a try. If it doesn't work out you can end treatment.
>>20323917for how long have you been using it and what does it do?
>>20323664Your twenty's sound like mind did except I never got better. I tried a lot of anxiety medication but none helped. What were you on?
>>20324501Been using it for at least a month now it's usually used for mothers but recent studies have shown it's also called a bonding chemical so it wants you or it helps you to be more comfortable making connections with other people studies are still ongoing but have been finding lots of positive results there are also a lot of anecdotal evidence for this being effective but the medical community is still out on this and adopting a wait and see approach but personally if anyone was having anxiety issues if they can get this chemical then I would really recommend it.Downside for some is it makes you a bit more emotional, but thars sort of the point. Its bout $40 per bottle, but 1 bottle lasts u about a month and IMO definitely worth.
>>20322914Something that's kind of helped my anxiety lately is trying to reinterpret anxiety as excitement. Whenever you get anxious just say "I'm excited."It seems futile and strange, but does help a lot.
>>20323664Same situation here. I've been slowly realizing how my anxiety has affected my life, and how much I've been missing in the world. I know you're on medication, but what are some good ways to overcome anxiety without it?
>>20323188I’m the opposite. I’m great one on one and feel out of place in large groups.
I got a bit too drunk and high without meaning to. It was a pretty shit party, so my friends stayed sober, but I idiotically spiralled out of control. I lost memory for an hour, then I started vomiting, at which point my memory came right back. I fell on the ground after a couple hours of that and got a ride home. A few months later, out of nowhere, my anxiety is going completely insane over that 1 hour that I couldn't remember. What if a stranger, or even one of my friends sexually violated me? Sure they're not gay, but what if they did it as a power trip? Maybe they were really supportive when I was barfing, but what if they were not so nice beforehand? Maybe they would have mentioned or acted weird if anything bad happened, but what if they agreed to keep a secret? Or what if one of them did it alone and nobody else knew and they'll keep it a secret forever? Maybe I would have noticed and ran away and told my other friends, or remembered a traumatic feeling because I managed to remember vomiting, but what if I was completely stoned and drunk out of my mind to notice? Maybe they never did anything rapey before and seemed nice on the inside, but what if they're more monstrous than I thought? Jesus I am feeling the worst I have ever felt in years.
>>20325584Those things that you're talking about probably didn't happen and even if they did, it was months ago. There's nothing you can do about it now. You're alive and well, please try to focus on that. I understand it's difficult.
>>20325600Thanks man. There's just so many ways it makes me feel like shit, like that fact that it barely affected me for the first few months. At first I was just like "Man I got fucking wasted on the couch, my friends found me half an hour later, we walked a couple blocks and I upchucked, but my friends were nice enough to stay with me". Now it's just a mess of anxiety that could have just never even happened.I will try to focus on the positives but yes it's really hard. Especially for a loner like me, it's hard to cope. On the plus side, all my other worries from before seem really insignificant now after feeling this much anxiety, so if I ever get over this I'll be the happiest person in the world.
>>20323664Dude I definitely have the replaying of bad memories, kind of like flashbacks. Worst part is, whenever I get one I audibly cringe, which sometimes creates more anxious memories. It is a vicious cycle. However I find that whenever I am ready to seek help, it is too bothersome. How did you end up actually seeking help?
I’m now nervous about looking nervous. As I’ve pushed and attempted to break through my social anxiety I’ve come to realize I really only had it (mainly with girls) because I didn’t know how to act or what to do; it was unfamiliar for me. But now that I’ve more or less learned that after pushing myself to do the things I feared (talk to girls, get numbers, hookups, dates) it seems I’ve made backwards progress. Now the issue is worse and it’s because I’m worried of how visibly anxious I am. How ridiculous is that? Plenty of girls take interest in me but because I’m too afraid of them seeing my anxiety (it’s very visible) I have stopped making progress.The biggest thing that’s started in the last 5 months is this staring out the corner of my left eye. I just can’t help it. It doesn’t even matter if I’m attracted to the girl or not, I have to fight my eye to not stare and it creeps people out. I think I’m worried about girls thinking I’m a creep and so it makes me act like and come off as one. In the moment, all I can think of is stuff along the lines of “you’re creeping them out, they think you want to fuck them and you’re rapey, they think you’re creepy” even if I have zero sexual interest in them.
>>20325662Not him but I'll tell you a brief story about myself if you don't mind reading it. Maybe it'll help. I spent years ruminating on my flaws, I knew I needed to get help. One sad day in high school I was fed up. I came home and told my mom that I was constantly anxious. I told her I wanted help. She listened and told me she would set up an appointment. It never happened. I could have continued to pester her about it but of course I was too anxious to really drive home the severity of my problems. So I continued on in my depressed complacency. Then last year I injured myself at work. I had to go to the doctor for the first time in a long time to get stitches removed from my leg. At this point in my life I did nothing but work, eat, and sleep. I would have been completely miserable if it weren't for the fact that I had work to keep me occupied. After the appointment was over she asked if I had any other concerns and in a surprising onset of emotion, I told her I was depressed. She asked me about my social life. I told her I didn't have one. She asked me about relationships. Never had any. I was humiliated. I denied further help and ran. Fast forward to today and I feel awful. I transferred to university and spend my days hiding from people. I developed a drinking problem because the thought of interaction without alcohol terrifies me. I'm failing school because I can't focus and procrastinate on everything. I hate my life. Don't run. That's my point in telling you this. Had I been honest when first disclosing my issues back then, maybe I wouldn't be in this position today. I have wasted years of my life because I didn't want to deal with everything that comes along with treatment. If you think you need help, PLEASE go talk to someone. If they don't help you talk to someone else. Don't give up, this is your only life. It took me hitting the bottom to see just how much I've ruined. I'm making an appointment ASAP. Hopefully you can do the same.
I'm mentally ill. It gets worse all the time. I just got out of the mental hospital. I had to drop my classes because of the mental hospital trip. My cognitive abilities are getting worse. I'm making mistakes I never would've made a couple of years ago. My brain is in a constant fog and if I don't find a way to fix it, I'll never be able to provide for my son. I hallucinate daily. I have panic attacks that render me unable to move for up to twenty minutes at a time. I just want to be a good parent with a career and a house and a happy family. That's all I want.What does a person do when therapy and medication don't seem effective, and when they have someone depending on them?
>>20325737Thank you very much for taking the time to write this down. I will try, and so should you, it is not too late yet. At least I don't think so. Try loving yourself and get out of your comfort zone. I would assume getting help would aid in this as well.Please take care of yourself, and know that you did something great today.
>>20325807Hey man you sound like me about a month ago. Hallucinations, panic, etc. Have you been diagnosed with anything/do you use any substances?
>>20325844Bipolar with psychosis, general anxiety/panic disorder. I don't use anything except what I'm prescribed. It was working in the hospital but it's not working now. I just burned myself a couple of days ago. I burned a word. I don't know why I burned the word.
>>20325827I definitely will. Thanks anon, we're all gonna make it.
I paced around my house for two hours because of an essay I have to write.
>>20325903do it. I had to submit an essay on Friday last week and I STILL haven't finished it. don't mess up.
>>20325935It's due next Friday, familia. I put a lot of pressure on myself to produce quality work.
Fuck guys i got hired at macdonalds waiting for the new college year to begin. Social anxiety is fucking me up. I feel like i am on the brink of going postal. Any tips from ex-workers ?
>>20325584Did your ass felt sore ? If not, they didn't raped you
>>20326051Oh no. In fact there was no indication that anything wrong happened. But it's possible for someone to touch my asshole or dick or some other non-intercourse thing and leave no sign. And of course my anxious brain latches on to these little possibilities.
>>20323929That's such a tiny dose it's almost placebo tier
>>20326119Mate, nothing happened. If you can't convince yourself then just trust me. Nothing happened. You should try meditation, it helped me with similar issues.
>>20324501>today.Not previous poster but I researched oxytocin a lot. It's the neurotransmitter of trust, and it's also involved in forming normal relationships with other people. People with autism are often shown to have low levels of it, so increasing levels can reduce autism symptoms.Oxytocin can't pass through the blood-brain barrier, so eating things or injecting it into your blood wouldn't do anything, but for some reason there is a path through the nose that doesn't need to go through the blood brain barrier. That's also probably why that one weird brain-eating amoeba can kill you if it gets in your nose while you're swimming in a river or something.There are other ways to increase oxytocin naturally. Google it.
>>20322914I fear goatsz
>>20324298Thanks, I understand what I need to do. There's no easy way out. Only, my mind is my own worst enemy.
Does anyone else get more physical symptoms like shaking or twitches? I dont really have social anxiety or anything but whenever i get slightly stressed ill start shaking everywhere from my jaw to my knees depending on how bad it is. Im taking prozac 10mg for it but its not really doing much so i might try something stronger
Sometimes people guess what I've been up to, and I get a paranoid feeling like everyone in the world is watching me but not telling me about it.
>>20327576I get pretty strong physical symptoms with acute anxiety, and I find that exercise helps a lot.
>>20322914hey i went out with a group of my girlfriends friends to an event last night alone even though I haven't socialized by myself for months. I was so fucking nervous about it all day but I did it and feel like a changed man.
>>20322914How do I know If my friend Is teasing me or straight up bullying me? He lives In japan and has a japanese gf. Every time we talk, he brags about It and say's that I should have also come to japan. I could but I'm from a second world shithole and I couldn't afford the tuition. He Is also from my country but his family Is rich. I feel like I'm losing my faith in humanity and In my friend. I am getting extremely sensitive and irritated. Plz help
>>20324110>>20325067>>20325506Zoloft. Here's the fucked up thing though. Just because it works for me doesn't mean it will work for you. There are a lot of different SSRIs and different ones are different fits for different people. I think I got pretty lucky, my doctor found a good fit the first time, I have a good friend who has changed medications like 3 or 4 times in maybe a year.>>20325252Yeah, my anxiety was so normalized for me I had no idea it wasn't normal. I just thought I was a weak pathetic person. I honestly don't know shit about over coming anxiety outside of taking my meds. I don't do anything else for it.>>20325662The short answer is I have health insurance and I made an appointment to see a shrink. The long answer is that my savings were running out and I either have to get it together or I was going to end up homeless and/or killing myself.
>>20328078what exactly does he say to you?
>>20328078Remember that people brag because they're insecure. If he's poking holes in your ego, it's because his is wounded.
>>20328315How can you tell the difference? I have a friend who constantly goes on about how fantastic his life is, how many women he's fucking, and whatever new bullshit he's into. It gets tiresome listening to it but he usually ends off saying I need to come visit him where he stays. Maybe he's just happy an excited? Makes me feel bad for getting tired of hearing it.
I've been trying to improve my mindset these past two years, but it's an absolute struggle. I struggle with envy, self loathing, social anxiety, and random bouts of sadness. I don't enjoy hobbies nearly as much as I used to be. I have friends, but even going out to have a good time with people I've known for years sends me into a near panic. I'm also extremely jealous my best friend and roommate. He's charming, attractive, intelligent, talented, and has an absolutely wonderful relationship with a girlfriend that I could've had myself if I wasn't such a blind fool those years ago. I love them both like family but watching the two of them together drives me up the wall, especially when I hear them have sex across the house. I want to have intamacy like that, but I have no clue where to meet women I'd like, and I'm too chicken shit to ever try talking to them. I'm able to make due for now and try to ignore my thoughts, but my lack of physical, emotional, and career success is slowly eating me up. I have a good job, but I'm ignoring my dream career, trying to make due with trying improve myself. Being 22 and just starting to try to find self worth is hard when I can't even know what it's like to have a relationship with a woman or feel pride. This has become a rant, but I need to get this out somehow.
>>20328324Remember in GTA4 when Roman was telling Nico all about his mansion and all the girls he's banging? Same thing.
>>20328324Here’s an anecdotal experience for youI have a friend, well call him tiny, he’s 5’ on the dot. Seems to have always overcome this, always been pretty confident and socially adept ever since we were small children. We grew apart after elementary school, linked up in the last couple years as young adults. He’s in the same apartment as when we were kids, but it’s his place now. He’s got a job, paying around $50k a year. We’re 23 year olds. I’m 6’2” but working shitty jobs while I get into training for my career field and living at home. He made it a point, either directed towards me or just in the social circle in general to constantly being up how it’s so great he has his own place and a good paying job. Now I could have at any time called him out because he pays only a fraction of cheap rent to his mom who owns the unit, or that the job is working under his mom because she got him the job. But I didn’t because it was the first time I truly saw insecurity in the guy, I’ve known him for so long. I know so painfully how it feels to be insecure and anxious, so I didn’t even humor the idea of calling him out.Point is as you’ve been told, it’s from a place of insecurity. Sure he could just be happy and wants you to come hang with him. You could always mention that you don’t have the financial funds like he does to travel and see if he offers to help you out with that.
>>20328738I can guarantee you that if I expressed that I'd really like to hang out, my friend would actually cover and pay for me to come through. Honestly, I think he might just be a genuinely sweet guy. I'm sure he struggles with anxiety and other insecurities because he did when we were kids, but maybe he's really just that caring. Of course he could just be doing that so people actually like him.
>>20328807Then try it man. If he offers to cover you have an answer, if he doesn’t then you won’t because he isn’t obligated to do it. I think if anything you should just be happy for him because being happy for someone feels a lot better than being sad Over them
Bump for nausea, hopelessness, the feeling of being trapped, and wanting a drastic escape, through quitting or even suicide
>>20328230He says that he is living the dream. Compared to where I live, he really is. But he also told me some time ago that he didn't like the japs. They always would treat him like a foreigner, talk shit behind his back, give him bad grades. That and also I don't think he will be able to stay there because apparently they don't give jobs to foreigners.
I have issues with touch. I hate being touched without permission, but I feel like all society wants to fucking do is touch me. People think because I am a young female I like having my shoulder patted or hugged and I fucking hate it. I feel like other people have a much smaller idea of personal space than me. Every time I go out in public people are either knocking into me, getting in my way or standing way too fucking close to me. I actually confronted an old lady the other day, it felt like she was humming in my fucking ear in the checkout line, told her to back up please but she didn't move a single muscle. I am 90% sure it's me and my anxiety making me feel this way but I can't fucking help feeling so squirmy and avoidant, I wish everybody would just stay the fuck BACK
one of my roommates told people I talk in my sleep, now I'm very concerned and can't stop thinking about what I may be saying. it's made worse by the fact that he didn't even tell me personally. help.
>>20329926are you an American? I feel like people are super touchy feely in the US but not really in most other countries
>>20330019That's funny because I feel like foreigners are worse with that unless they are nordic. I met my bf's cousin from Spain a few months back and he greeted me with kisses on both cheeks, shocked me. If I lived somewhere where people did that constantly idk what I'd do
>>20330027I feel you though. I don't understand why people have to get so close. even strangers feel like they're walking directly on my ass. I hate when I'm opening the door and someone stands directly behind me so I bump into them when I take a step back.