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Only hit me up when it's late night
Then going ghost, disappearing in the daylight.
>>
Fuck people
>>
I'm as attracted to him as I was to you. I never thought that was possible?

Aside from that, there is no other likeness between you two.

He's my age and generation. What a relief that is!!

He's financially set and stable. I'm so not used to a guy with money?

He's consistent and reliable. He doesn't ghost me or flake out on me. He lets me know he's there in my life, interested and actions match his words.

He's so humble and kind, to everyone! He doesn't have this massive ego, trying to compensate for an inferiority complex.

He's funny and genuine. I feel entertained and relaxed with him.

His personal hygiene is perfect. He takes care of himself, workouts regularly and dresses nicely. He's not overly concerned about his appearance though.

I'm terrified of all this. He's too good to be true so I'm taking it slowly. He's patient understanding and supportive.

Thank you for fucking up so badly that I was able to finally move on from you.

I now have an opportunity for happiness with someone. I've worked on being happy with myself this year. It's like, as soon as I mastered that, he appeared.<3
>>
Stop claiming that anger is beneath you when you're short with your child for not knowing any better.

Stop acting like you're indifferent to problems you're accountable for.
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>>20320158
See, anons, if you become rich and successful, you can appreciate the leftovers of a poor Chad who already used all her holes.
>>
Stratocaster>Jaguar>Jazzmaster>Telecaster>Duo Sonic>Mustang>Les Paul>Firebird>SG>Explorer>Flying V>Les Paul jr
>>
I wish people would stop making me out as a hero or some great person because of my wife's disability. I'm not making a huge sacrifice by being with her.
>>
I occasionally realize how bizarre it is that I study so hard to try and get jobs that I don't really want.
But I have never really acted as if I get to decide what happens to me.
And it would be too terrifying to start now
>>
>>20320158
>>20320208
Try again bitter little bitch.

Money is only one facet of the post. This guy is the whole package.

Something you'll never know about.
>>
>>20320208
You don't have to be rich so much as have willpower not to blow your entire paycheck on cigarettes, McDonald's every day and videogame shit every given moment.
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>>20320246
It's not what you make but what you keep.
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>>20320252
and the list mentions a whole bunch of other traits.

Being a misunderstood, insecure, physically unhealthy and smelly guy with shit taste in clothes doesn't outweigh being "nice" deep down inside.
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>>20320233
And why would this "whole package" go for a used up slut like you?
>>
I'm just tired and i don't want to attempt having a stable relationship or any hope for good things to come anymore. should i say, expectations based on nothing concrete, as if i matter in this world enough to expect something. if i want to survive, that's up to me. there's no place for two, or for a spiritual power that pays back all my good deeds. there is no prize for good little girls
>>
>>20320297
Exactly. Unfortunately my ex was only nice to the public. He had a "nice guy" image to uphold. People (except his closest family) knew how insanely abusive he could be.

Looking back on him, I see all those issues that I tried to overlook. He has some very deep seeded issues that manifested themselves in his day to day life. Lack of motivation and commitment to anything including his hygiene.

I'm not saying every poor slob is inherently evil or "bad". But usually these symptoms are a sign of something more at work.

Take care of those deep issues, and it kind of works through your whole life. You end up taking better care of yourself and your surroundings.
>>
>>20320324
You're making this very personal friend.

You don't know me but if you did you'd know I'm a highly intuitive self aware individual with mad skills in many areas of life and a lot to offer at all levels. I'm content and happy in general. I guess that shows outwardly and he's picked up on it. ;)
>>
The guy I like sent me a picture of him
In a reflection on a surface i could see a girl taking the picture
Same hair colour as the girl I saw in another picture with him
I'm just disappointed by people's dishonesty
>>
>>20320338
>I'm a highly intuitive self aware individual with mad skills
Lol, ok.
Still a used up slut.
>>
>>20320369
How you see the world and the people in it, is very sad. I pity you and yet you haven't a clue why. You're very poor and I don't care what your bank account says either.

You will never find genuine lasting happiness or contentment.
Probably need to get high or drunk to deal with your reality. Or escape with viday or porn.
I bet you sit down to pee.
>>
>>20320369

Look we get it. You weren't born into the genetic lottery and a girl rejected you in middle school. Get over it dude.
>>
>>20320393
Noice. Couldn't have said it better.
>>
>>20320216
You simply love her and that's it.
Others don't understand that, they just think of the hassle and don't see how your love for someone makes that so insignificant.
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>>20320393
>>20320402
Truth hurts, I guess.
>>
>have to be on pills for medical reasons
>completely kills my already low libido
wonder if I’ll ever get a bf at this point
>>
>>20320518

What "truth" lol
I'm not even the same person you initially replied to. You just assume because you came here to take out your own personal problems on random people.
>>
just saw or rather am 95% certain i saw my ex at the gas station in her car

>texted her couple of minutes later if she wanted to grab something to eat
>if it isn't her i might've just texted her while that other guy who apparently told her he loves her too, is fucking her

when did i start becoming such a fucking failure in life
>>
>>20320561
I'm the person he originally replied to and yeah it's nice to see random strangers can see this person is just being toxic.
>>
>"Don't think so much about the future, live in the moment instead"
Thinking about the future is the only thing that keeps me going right now. I've got nothing in the moment to enjoy but am still somehow positive that given enough time things will work out and I have so many good things ahead of me.
>>
I have no regrets from the relationship aside from, I should've left it sooner.
>>
I prefer cuddling my gf to fucking her.
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>>20320684
Lucky gf
>>
>>20320579
why did i do that
>>
>>20320695
how?
>>
>>20320705
You prefer intimacy than just getting off
>>
I'm a bit horny but my kids are always around and my husband can't keep hard in a condom (I can't be on bc for medical reasons)
Horniness has this aftertaste of apathy when you get older, or at least in my case. The bio clock is telling me, it's okay bitch, you're done. Take a breather, have some fucking cake. P lame.
>>
>It's the gf dream again
Damn, now to feel like shit for an hour or so
>>
Is the 3rd date too soon to tell the girl you have feelings for her?
>>
i cant stop hurting myself emotionally

how to stop
>>
I want to know why you are being so cold to me so suddenly. I really wanted to be friends. You always happily chat with others but with me you're silent now.
I kinda want to text you and ask what's going on, but it's not like we were that close in the first place and I feel like I'm overstepping boundaries by asking.
>>
I want a qt middle class white normalfag gf
>>
my ex has fucked me over so many times yet i fucking miss her so much, i hate and love her at the same time, we havent been together since march but i still kept seeing her up until september cause she made me believe it could still work, that hoe. only saw her a couple times on the street while i was driving and it made me feel such an apathy and sadness that i can barely think straight when it happens, i keep seeing her face everywhere and i sometimes think im going crazy.
on a different note, i will show every fucker who always doubted me that i can do what i want with my music, it doesnt matter if i dont have the best equipment or loads of followers and shit like that, ill make music for me and only do what i want to do, not what others want to listen to. i will not sell myself for some cash, fuck everyone who doesn't believe in me, im proud of what i do.
>>
I can barely get through the week without drugs now. What happened?
>>
>>20320945
you and me both anon
kept meeting up with her, having sex etc. 2 months after she broke up
everytime i thought there's still hope somewhere inside of her
saw her tonight, pretty certain and i felt awful
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>>20320642
totally what i think too, now is a bad period for me and im only thinking about myself and my future, its the only thing keeping me going. good luck with everything anon
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>>20320951
we broke in march man, i didnt hear from her once during the summer if not one time that she wrote to me saying she went to a club and hoes out that night, i felt like shit for a bit but then i felt better, saw her again in september, she gave such hope that i was sure 100% we'd be together again, then just...nothing, one day out of the blue she tells me she wants nothing to do with me anymore. im usually a really stable guy, emotionally speaking, but this girl literally turned my head around and made me become a little bitch. i hope you feel better anon, really do
>>
>>20320982
i feel you so hard anon...
mine told me, that she fucked with someone else, that theres another guy who told her he loves her
made the mistake of sleeping with her, a fter she told me that
every single damn time we look each other in the eyes for just a split second theres this...firey connection which she choses to ignore for the most part

i hope we both feel better soon anon
im letting it affect work and stuff, not good
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>>20320989
i know what you mean anon, it happens to me too and we can't let it ruin our lives. its so hard not to think about her whilke doing stuff but she just keeps popping into my head... in the morning when i wake up i keep expecting to find her, really i dont even know what to think anymore, ive never felt this way and its killing me... we fucked a lot too back in the days, and i keep remembering details and shit like that.. i cant even work on my music lately, i cant seem to write or produce anything, makes me feel totally worthless

anon im telling you, im a totally different person usually but this period is changing me in a person i dont want to be, i keep smoking j's to stay stoned and not think about shit and im spengind so much i had to ask a loan from a friend who knows im in a bad place... fuck me
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>>20320989
also i started spending money on bets and other drugs other than weed, i havent even bought groceries in over a month, i keep eating kebabs snd sandwiches from a bar in town... fuck writing all of this is making me realize what a fucking failure i have begun
>>
Please come back to me, please. I'm sorry I hurt you over and over again, breaking all the chances you gave me. I love you more than anything and I'm a changed man. I can't do this without you, I need you. I need you more than anything. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't fucking pay attention to anything. All of my previous interests feel hollow, my heart hurts every second of every day. I know I put you through heartache, but please don't forsake me forever.
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>>20321018
*become
>>
Debating whether or not I should tell my friends I am feeling depressed.

I don't feel like ending my life or hurting myself physically at all, although I do tend to joke about it a lot (because I've always had a dark sense of humor). Still, the past year I have felt a LOT of anxiety, periods where I just have trouble sleeping and days where I can't focus on my work because I feel tired all the time. Today is one of those days.

I'm debating whether I should say something or not because lately I feel like I can't really hang out with them anymore. Either I don't have the energy for it, feel like I'd just be giving off negative vibes or even feel outright envious at their apparent happiness.

I don't want to lose them as friends but I also don't want to cause undue alarm or frustration on their part.
>>
Just please, send me a message saying you hate me. I just want to know you are alive.
Why must this hurt so god damn much
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why the fuck did I even make food and wait around for you today if it turns out you can't even hang out? wasting my fucking time

>waah anon that's selfish

fuck you. there's a million other things i could've done that would be more productive than waiting around, and now im stuck here bitching about it with a bunch of other losers
>>
>>20320208
WOW!
Thanks anon!
Now I know who to strive for!
When I grow up, I wanna be Boogie2988!
>>
>>20321140
I love you forever
>>
5 years ago my parents called the cops on me and sent them to my dorm room because I smoke weed. They then had me involuntarily commited to a psych ward since I was only 1 month from being 18 and i thought I was the second coming of Jesus Christ. But I also found out my mom is a whore and my dad is a literal cuck who lets her sleep with other men. When I told my dad his wife is a whore he pretended he didnt know, then I went back to my dorm and saw cops waiting outside. That night I was transported to a psych ward. When I got out they kept my car from me for 2 months. I got in a wreck and totaled it 1 week later. They lied and said there was no insurance payment which I naively believed for a year. My mom got herself a new car shortly after. When I found out they lied I flipped out, and they kicked me out and i was homeless for 2 days until sent me to my uncle for 2 weeks, then they let me back in.

Fast forward 5 years, I'm still living with them since they sabotaged my college experience and life. I have not worked in about 2 years because they finally got me another car and I am still trying to finish my degree. I have been seething this whole time over my shit parents. At this point they stopped buying food to starve me. I flip out again and they kick me out again. This time I'm homeless for 3 weeks and have to find a job before I get my own place. Everything seems fine but then last Tuesday I total my car again because I gave some bitch at work a ride home because SHE totaled her car. Now my life is even more fucked up and it's all because of my cunt parents. Fucking assholes. Btw, I only thought I was Jesus because I gained special powers and didn't know how to explain them. I still have the powers but stopped thinking I was Jesus long ago, but much after the psych ward. Totally unnecessary experience, hope my parents die
>>
>>20321224
You are probably just another LARPer, but..
I never ment to hurt you, but I did. I hurt you so bad
>>
>>20321254
you are insane and if I were your parents I'd probably hate you too
>>
I am so glad our son is not around you now.

I think the best of you has past. You've become nothing more than a hedonistic narcissist living off mommy.

I'm embarrassed for you. I'm embarrassed you're his father. You'd rather drink, drug and go to orgies than take care of child support and doing what you need to in order to get visitations.

Crazy. And mommy is totally fine with it because you come home to her most nights so you can take her to work in the morning. Play house on nights you're home.

Your siblings are at least a little healthier and stay away from the emotionally incestual couple that you are.
>>
>>20321254
You are psychotic.
>>
>spend years having nothing much to do, no one calling me
>meet girl I really like
>between her crazy work schedule and all the shit I got going on can hardly spend any time together
>always hanging with her for a few minutes here and there and but haven't had a proper date weeks after having met
>can't bring her over
>can't go to her house
>literally every time we plan something, something more pressing comes up and I or her have to cancel
>in constant contact but can't spend any quality time together
Fuck this shit
>>
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You lied to me 4chan, I have no powers. Oh well. I've long ago lost the hope and decided to just live my life the way it is. I'm not unhappy or anything and my life is actually pretty decent if I do say so myself. Just slipped through the cracks on this one I guess.

Not upset, just disappointed.
>>
>>20320158
>this guy is so great but let me take time to write you a letter about how he's better than you
The one that fucked you over is still occupying a ton of space in your head and this new guy you're seeing is just a placeholder, someone you can look at and feel satisfied because you're doing better than the one who hurt you
>>
>>20321259
Yes, I'm imagining you are my ex gf that I still love with all my heart. I'm pretending you're her to ease the indisputable fact that she doesn't love me anymore.
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>>20320158
I imagine this is what my ex is saying about me. Thanks for fucking me up.
>>
I'm so fucking lonely. I miss my ex so bad. I'm lost and alone and I just want to cry all the time. It feels like it's never going to get better
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>>20321395
Happy birthday anon, I hope it's your best year yet
>>
>>20320158
I imagine you saying this, lovebug, and it makes me feel horrible about hurting you, ashamed of my actions, but it also puts a fire under my ass to change for the better. I've been sober for over a month now.
>>
I put date rape drugs into my female friend's drink.
I couldn't do it. I took her to my place and let her sleep it off in my room while I drank my pain away.
What do, I really love her but she's taken.
>>
Im a bad person
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>>20321456
>What do, I really love her but she's taken.
No you don't. You don't put date rape drugs in someone's drink when you love them.
>>
>>20321456
If someone is happier without you, and you love them, you don't force yourself into their life thinking that you'll make it better. Try simply talking to her next time. Confessing is much more suitable to drugging, you fucking degenerate scumbag.
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>>20320139
Yep
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>>20320131
you people are fucking dead. All of you. It doesn't matter now, you're all dead.
>>
my faith in humanity is fucking dead. They knew why I was there, and they decided to be fucking cunts. You guys had a chance to do the right thing and you didn't.

You're all fucking dead when I get free. You can't do this to people you fucking pricks. The NSA/FBI cunts are fucking dead. The celebrities will burn and you mother fuckers will not die quickly.
>>
>>20321550
and no, it's not "fine in my ear" it FUCKING HURTS YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNT
>>
>>20321466
Me too, anon, me too
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>>20321540
Are you talking to us about the inevitability of one day dying, or just proclaiming you're gonna murder some people? Good luck with your nigger warfare anon.
>>
>>20320131
Im not getting the surgeries at-fucking-all.

And that tranny fucking doctor is fucking dead.
>>
>>20320131
welp, that confirmed it too.

My mother is such a shitty fucking cunt that she has been trying to get me taken away in an "out of sigh, out of mind." kind of way.

God I fucking hate you people so fucking much. You haven o fucking idea how much I fucking hate all of you. You are all such shitty fucking disgusting pieces of shit. You are trying to torture someone to death... because.... why? Tradition? Entertainment? What the fuck is wrong with you fucking cunts.
>>
>>20321436
Sounds like you were already fucked up
>>
>>20321411
Hm, possibly but "a lot of space" I wouldn't necessarily agree with. Its significantly less than what it has been, that's for sure.
And this new guy is just a friend. For now. He's showing gentle and consistent interest. I've been through hell and I'm not ready to get involved again.
He seems to understand this. I'm scared of him because he seems so put together. Not a single red flag. Idk what the fuck to do about that! I'm not used to it but it feels so nice.
I'm giving it time and we'll see where this goes. I'm in no rush and he doesn't seem to be either.
I like him. I enjoy him. I've made a new friend who I can see more with. That is nothing shy of a miracle to me.
>>
>>20321466
Well I guess I'm not alone
>>
>>20321357
Ew
>>
I can't even avoid hurting the people I love. I just want to be one with the void by now
>>
I said all that to you and yet I was still too cowardly to just say "I love you."I am glad to know that you do wear the necklace that I got you though. I honestly thought you were just like giving it away or throwing it out. I wish you would wear it at least one time around me so I could know but that's the truth. But you don't lie so. And that is something I really like about you.
>>
>>20321019
Stop fucking with people's hearts.
>>
I have both a giant ego, and low self worth. I interpret meaningless gestures from other people as them secretly being in love with me, but also think no one actually like/loves or is interested in me in anyway. its very confusing and I dont like it
>>
Fuck you. You treated me so disrespectfully and im not even going to rack my brain to try and figure out why. I should have expected it when I told you bluntly that I'm naive though. What did you think was going to happen? That id just send you nudes to please you? Like I'm some fucking high schooler who hasn't learned the lesson that sex doesn't keep boys around? You tried to take advantage of how I felt for you. You manipulated me and made me jealous on purpose. You're pathetic. I'm done. I told you that I don't just put out for fun, did you think things would be different because you're just so fantastic? I hope you enjoy me never talking to you again. I hope you enjoy the ugly looks you get from my friends and coworkers. I hope you rot, and I feel pride in being clever enough to see through your absolute bullshit. I would have never stood up for myself before. But I've grown so much these past few years. Don't call me your kind, when you're so far behind me.
>>
I've finally found the love of my life but because we're both broke college students with no way to support ourselves I'm too paranoid of getting her pregnant to have sex with her even with the pill and condoms used in tandem.
>>
>>20322246

Stop being a faggot and smash her. You won't get her pregnant if you take the right precautions.
>>
>>20321540

Please do not kill people. You are better than that.
>>
I'm 29 and feel kinda filthy and creepy for thinking a 19 year old female friend of mine is hot
>>
>>20322292
I don't think that's creepy, anon.
>>
>>20322292
Nah man that's natural. She's around the prime child birth age for women, and you're around the age when men fully mature. It's just birds and bees my dude.
>>
I feel like I've never even participated in life. I'm just here watching shit go on around me. I want to make friends but I feel so detached that I can't bring myself to bother. I need to stop this shit.
>>
>>20320131
Fucking boomers, I swear to god.
My biggest responsibility at my job is babysitting a man who is almost sixty. He's an absolute burden. He's obese, selfish, entitled. I can't get him to do his job.To add insult to injury, because we're in a union we're making the same amount of money.
I pray to god he gets put into my position when I graduate college and he gets fired when it's clear he can't do anything.
>>
Why... Why didn't you invite me? I wanted to go too...
>>
>>20322055
It's a dual between your hormones and your conscious thought.
>>
>>20322378
I'm hurting.
>>
>>20322359
I know the feeling of feeling like I'm phoning it in everywhere, more so as I'm getting older.
I really don't know a way out.
>>
People stop believing in tooth fairy
People don’t think about it
Turns out tooth fairy has two jobs
Collecting teeth and giving wet dreams
>>
IM SO SICK OF HAVING TO WORK AND JUST STAND ON MY FEET SLAVING FOR 10 HOURS A DAY FOR ONLY $600 A WEEK FUCK ITS NOT EVEN GOOD MONEY IM ALWAYS TIRED AND I FEEL LIKE A ROBOT I HAVE NO LIFE AND NO TIME I WASNT MEANT TO WORK FOR SHIT MONEY THAT ONLY GOES TO MAKING ME SURVIVE I DESERVE TO LIVE LIFE AND EXPLORE THE EARTH AND LOVE NATURE FUUUCK
>>
>>20322456
Where do you live?
>>
>>20322464
wisconsin but how come?
>>
>>20322469
Just curious. I feel for you.

Do you live in an urban area? I'm >>20322374
I'm a security guard. It's not high status or anything but it is pretty stress free. I'm making $16.60 an hour to do classwork and post on 4chan. The worst thing I have to do is deal with my retarded boomer underling and walk around the building once in a while.
>>
>>20322488
Not who you're replying to but I'm a semi fit female at five six. Do you think I could be a security guard? tired of this minimum wage shit.
>>
>>20321456
Seek help from a professional. Rape is the furthest thing from "love." It destroys the person you do it to. You should distance yourself from your female friend, for her own good. It sounds like you have a serious obsession with her to go that far.
>>
>>20322499
There's a misconception that you have to be fit or whatever to be a security guard. The answer is definitely not. If you can pass a drug test you can almost certainly qualify. My co-worker is like 5'6 and probably close to 260.
If you don't mind working occasional shit hours it's a great college job.
>>
>>20322499
yes. femanon guard here. a little taller than you but an absolute lanklet, no muscle to speak of. do the same thing as the other anon but less pay, above minwage though.
>>
>>20322516
Okay. Interesting. I looked up public transportation officer positions and it looks p easy to get hired. I just look a little "nice" because I have big eyes. Maybe I could do something like library security.
>>
>>20322527
Good luck!
>>
Parents always say having children is rewarding and worthwhile and yet I never hear any anecdotes that support that argument. The stories are always about how stressful and frustrating, and honestly just downright horrible being a parent is.

Everyone's always telling me I should have kids but not one person has ever given me a single example as to why I wouldn't absolutely despise the experience.
>>
>>20322545
http://slatestarcodex.com/2018/01/16/bundles-of-joy/
>>
Should I back down / backtrack on every decision if I get a bit of a bad feeling about it? The thing is I feel some sort of regret every time I have to make any slightly big decision.
>>
>>20322527
honestly, I have had no problems and I guard an establishment of 99% nogs 1% whites. most security is observe and report unless you're working at like a mall and have to follow around some stealing minorities. I'm white and told I am conventionally attractive at least every 3 times I leave the house by a stranger, and constantly by people I know/classmates, still have never had any problems. to anyone else reading this, please dont apply for security unless you truly are the kind of person that needs a bottom of the barrel easy job and take it from me and the retardeds. most atypical people quit because the boredom drives them insane anyway so FUCK OFF REEE
>>
>>20322556
meant typical not atypical
>>
>>20322556
In highschool I was a lifeguard and it seems like the same gig. Just walking around and watching, and occasionally having to go "hey. I see you." I liked that job a lot then.
I find basically everything boring and don't think I'd mind doing something boring hahaha. I don't have the drive to do anything right now so maybe itd be good for this phase in my life.
>>
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Man, i want to dropout of uni but I don't know what steps to take if I do. God I sometimes wish there was an easy way to gain financial stability.
>>
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my (C)PTSD is fuckin ridiculous. I'm supposed to be helping my roommates interview a new potential resident right now but the doorbell startled me so much I literally ran away and was huddled in my closet shaking and crying before I knew what was up. Now I'm embarrassed in addition to being anxious and forgetful as fuck.

And this is /after/ therapy. These nightmares, frequent immersive flashbacks, feeling like a reanimated corpse, can't handle a grocery store or a pharmacy, flinch every time someone gets too close or drops a fork, this is after I've done what I was supposed to do for it. it'd be funny if it weren't so depressing. I'm gonna be like this forever.
>>
>>20321018
>kebabs

Dead
>>
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>>20322417
neither do i
guess this is what life's all about
>>
Thank you for translating my vision. You are the loves of my life.
>>
>>20320131
Should I bother to make a cheat sheet for my Java final?
>>
As I always said, I don't care if you steal from me, profit off of me but I DO care if you do it right. You did it right. I felt the love. Thank you.
>>
In the grand scheme of things he is sort of a nothingburger. Thank you for showing me his place in all of this.
>>
I'm a muse, that's what I do. That's precisely why you see me everywhere.
>>
It is insane that to know you're still alive I have to google your name and find out your time on that stupid marathon you love to run. I'm so happy to know you're fine and you did a good time this year. Even though you're more fucked than I am, I understand you're going through hard times. "It is complicated" you said once. Well, indeed it is; and I never know when it'll be the last time I see or talk to you.

However one word from you can change everything, and I would follow you to the end of the world.
>>
Dear Dad,
You suck.

Love- your son.
>>
Yeah, she is beautiful, talented, resilient, hilarious, brilliant and everything you people will never be. You'll never turn her because she is of God. You'll all learn eventually.
>>
I'm liberal and proud of it.
>>
I'm definitely from the Capulet tribe.
>>
Conservative views serve the patriarchal system in place.
>>
All I wanted to do was become a hot air balloon pilot. Fly away and above it all, make some money from it, spread some happiness and serenity. This was my desire since I was four and saw one land on accident in my backyard. The giant beautiful balloon with the tiny basket, just enough room for a few friends or lovers, and the endless sky.

Now I'm too old, broke, lost, distracted, and burdened. My country is going to hell and my children will never see me truly at peace, floating above it all with a smile on my face. Now I toil under the weight of the decline of capitalism and my boomer parents' failures to be emotionally and mentally stable enough to raise a child to be the same, I've lost all motivation to pursue my dream and am not sure it would make me happy anyway. With everything going on, it feels selfish. Like I should go back to school for nursing or something instead to help others that way.

No advice please. I'm just revisiting old dreams to figure out my future.
>>
>>20322957
No advice but you put a smile on my face (sorry and that's hard to do). I'd love to fly with you.
>>
Question for the psychfags:

Is it possible for someone (usually a man) with psychosis to rape whilst going through a delusion?

I ask, because my bf has psychosis; one morning he was on top of me trying to fuck me. I pushed him off and asked him about it once he woke up but he said he didn't remember anything. Is this possible, or was he deliberately trying to rape me?
>>
Fuck I quit all social media and stopped talking to this guy who I was romantically involved with because he's a dick and FUCK I'M SO BORED. I'm just waiting for my dinner to stop cooking and then I can do other things that will preoccupy me but fuck fuck fuck I just want to text him or reinstall social media apps. I wont. But fuck.
>>
>>20322378
Because fuck you, that's why.
I invited him because he is a pal.
>>
>>20323032
Get real hobbies. Quit 4chan, too, while you're at it - it's no better than social media.
>>
I feel so alone. I feel like I'm constantly ridiculed for being myself, for speaking my mind, for taking a stand for what I believe in, and I can't even talk about my greatest failure without losing all of my closest friends. I don't know what the fuck to do right now.
>>
I'm so tired of baggage weighing me down from being able to form intimate relationships
>>
>>20322984
That sounds horrible.
>>
Well. At least I tried. I won't chase you anymore...i don't want to lose you as a friend. I'm so sorry if I stressed you out. I'll quit it. I can be a good friend.
>>
>>20323247
You tried?
>>
I didn't understand the meaning of love before I met her, maybe I'm just naive (21) but when she approached me wanting to spend time together after we met playing our favorite game, I thought she might be different from the rest.

We opened up to eachother so much, she chose to spend all of her free time with me for weeks, we texted eachother while she was working, we related so much, talking to eachother was so easy, she told me she cared about me and would be there for me, she would always come right next to me ingame and look right at me, we would stay like that for hours just talking or watching things together.

Of course it was too good to be true, I knew that, because when her beta orbiter friend realized that she would rather spend time with someone who gives a fuck about her, he got jealous and started manipulating her, and when we hanged out he would show up, I decided to tell her how I felt because I was tired of this fucking cuck getting in the way, but it turns out he revealed how he felt an hour before I did, and she broke down in voice with me, saying she cared for both of us and had to make a choice.

That was 3 days ago, and now she says she doesn't want to talk about it more, thanks for proving to me that you're just the same, thanks for lying about how you felt about me just to string me along, and I guess all of the time we spent together was meaningless too? What the FUCK did I ever do to you to deserve this pain? I think about her every hour, I truly care about her, what do I do? I have not messaged her to give her time hoping she will realize she made a mistake, but it hurts so much.
>>
Jess, I'm lost. I don't know what I want things to look like. I don't know what I want to be to you. I just like you, and I wish the reality were as simple as the statement.
-John
>>
I'm going to miss you dearly. All I can say is thank you for exemplifying class, grace, kindness, and love. Losing you so suddenly was horrible. It still doesn't even seem real yet, but the reality will settle in with time. I don't think any of us know what we're going to do without you. This Christmas is going to be brutal, but only because we loved you so much and we know you loved us, too. Thank you for everything you gave us. May you rest in peace. I love you. We all do.
>>
>>20323253
I think I made my feelings clear.
>>
I hate it when the democrats support the far left
>>
>>20323394
t. far right cuck.
>>
>>20323400
Im a dem btw closer to center, but in no way wan to support looneys
>>
I have been drunk and/or stoned almost every single day for the last ten months. I've had an awesome time. I've gamed my ass off. Actually got really good at a few games and grinded my way from the beginning of FF14 all the way to the hardest raid content in the span of about three and a half months, somehow managing to schmooze my way to officer status and main-healer of one of the best FC's on my server. I got to diamond in a ranked matchmaking system for the first time ever (Smite), and I've done a bunch of other cool stuff in a few other games.

The only problem(s)? I've cut at least a couple of years off of my life expectancy with all of this booze, I've alienated the few IRL friends I had at the outset of the year, and I've effectively put my future career on hold for an entire year.

feelsbadman
>>
>>20323400
>>20323394
we live in a society where you're constantly being pushed politically. you cannot stay still. if you try and remain where you are, one side calls you a leftist and the other calls you a fascist.
its sad to see
>>
I love current gf, I really do, but recently started thinking of my female best friend romantically... I hate myself for it
>>
Woke up about an hour ago. And you were the first thing on my mind again.
>>
Hey Sam,
I know there are zero chance you will ever read this. But that's fine, let it go into the void I guess?

First off, I'm writing this slammered off my ass, So spelling and grammar is out the window.
I truly never meant to hurt you, I've never ever done something like this before. You know I've been guarding this peace of coal that I've called my heart. I tried so hard not to fall for you. But man was I weak, and I resent myself so much for it. Because deep down I knew you would get hurt. Even if i tried to warn you. "You make me laugh, I make you cry" You though I was joking? I always seem to make people i care about cry. I am weak i guess.
Weak for your attention, your mind, your personality. I should have cut you off when I knew, and I fucking knew that I would hurt you. And that's rather the opposite of what I wanted for you, I wanted to be so good to you.

But nine years are a lot, a lot of common friends, history, family and feelings to cut off. You are damn right it's scary. And I don't know If i could have done it if I took the chance. Not to talk about the fact that I've never met you in real life, what we had I...
What we had was beautiful, and I loved every part of it. I cherished it so, I... I was walking around with a spring in my step. you truly was my intellectual.. I don't want to say crush because it cheapens it, but my beloved one.

I want you to be happy, and I truly don't want you to live of the crumbs I can provide. Just please, move on... Just please, live.

Love
-I
>>
my therapist thinks im a loser
>>
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I was so close to losing my virginity, but I literally couldn't get it up when push came to shove. Tried jerking off, watching porn, you name it, I tried it.

I feel like a goddamn joke right now. I feel like I'm in hell and god is mocking me.
>>
My fucking foreskin is itchy as fuck and I know it aint an STD.
>>
I wish I hadn’t followed you around like a fucking puppy. I wish I hadn’t been so fucked up that I couldn’t leave you sooner.
>>
>>20321550
>>20321557

I wish this anon would get help
>>
>Every thread until you like it


I want to be a mom so bad
We talked about it today and it made me so happy
I love you and I can't wait to build a family with you
>>
Why do you think I have feelings for you? I was just being nice.
>>
I wish I could stop worrying about social relationships. I think about so many people that probably never have me on their mind and it drives me crazy.
But at the same time I remember all the bad social interactions I had with them and think, that they allways think i'm awkward and talk behind my back about me. It feels like i'm allways the center of negativity and nothing positive comes from me.
I feel like no one's special person.
I don't want to ingage with people because I allways feel like i'm bothering them and everytime I meet with friends it feels like they are only nice to me because they pity me. And that doesn't change no matter how often I meet up with them.
I have trust issues and can't really open up to anyone because I don't want to be made fun of behind my back. (and its not 100% irrational because it happened once to me and I had to leave my friendgroup of 8 people because they did exactly that and I couldn't trust them anymore)
When I fail at something or if something is too much of a task, I often say to myself: "If I really tried I could have done that", and I abandon it completely.
Many people have told me I have bad a 'black-and-white'-thinking and that the world is much more than that and that there are so many grey-areas in between but I can't help myself to allways search the 'black-and-white'-answers to anything.
I hate psychiatrists and don't want to visit one because it feels like they just look through people and look down on them. It makes me feel discusted when I think about beeing analysed and broken down like some exam or poetry-analysis.
I allways try to be nice and helpfull to people I don't know very well or people I know that don't like me, but at the same time I can be repulsive to people that are nice to me.
Sometimes I feel like i'm so much better than others and then feel like i'm one of the worst.

Sorry for the long text anons...
>>
Is it normal to dislike something you do with your girlfriend if she does it with someone else? She did it and my interest is 100% dead in the thing because i dont feel special
>>
I wish this emotional turmoil would stop and That I would just fall down the stairs and break my neck. Anons what do?
>>
>chat with a girl
>she works in some large company
>ask her if she gets benefits like sports and shit there
>"yeah we do :)"
>"so I guess you could say all of you out there are friends with benefits :DD"
No response. I guess she didn't find that joke funny... God I fucking suck at talking to girls.
>>
You don’t love me. You think you do, but you don’t.
>>
>>20323586
oof after seeing your "joke" I understand why.
>>
I have actual autism, but I hate other autistic men because theyre cringe af
>>
I'm tired. I'm fucking tired of becoming what I really am.
>>
>>20323595
Is it really that bad? It's a dadjoke but it's not something anybody would get offended with for fucks sake.
>>
>>20323603
No your joke just fucking sucked. She probably got offended by it being so inoffensive or hacky as fuck.
It just showed the type of person you are with it.

Also you could just be overthinking it and she's just doesn't know how to yes and.

To reiterate I hate u because you're a hack.
>>
>>20323611
Nigga I'm just really into wordplay type of jokes. Sure it wasn't the funniest thing on earth but for fucks sake this isn't a reason to kill a conversation over.

Though I suppose if she's the type of girl who gets offended at something like this, then it's good we're not taking things any further. But still, she actually seemed nice and seemed to have her heart in the right place.
>>
>>20323586
Lame and creepy literal cuck joke. Maybe she doesn't want to be with a cuck.
>>
>>20323618
What the fuck is cuck about it and what's creepy?
>>
>>20323615
She isn't that interested if that "offensive" joke killed the convo.
>>
>>20323629
I guess she isn't. I fucking hate the dating game. Jesus christ I fucking hate this shit so much.

There used to be one girl that laughed at my jokes and actually made ones of her own. I wish things worked out between us because she was literally the only one that had the exact same sense of humour I did.
>>
>>20323629
>>20323618
>>20323611
Nvm, she actually just responded. Seems to have found it funny but confusing a bit.
>>
I-I'm not a slut, just a flirt. I wouldn't know what to with the situation if I persisted enough to get there. I'm actually scared and very awkward.
>>
I've been moved out for 4 years but I still cringe and expect to be treated like I was at home, mostly by my mom/brothers. They would constantly nitpick at me. I laughed too loud? Scolded, told to calm down, "JEEZ". I got up too fast? Startling, what's the rush, jeez!!! I closed a cupboard too loud? GEEZ WHAT ARE YOU MAD ABOUT, DON'T BREAK IT! Mess up a word like "worsh" instead of "wash"? HAHA WORSHWORSHWORSH!I I could also never say anything without being misinterpreted half the time, they'd attribute some "hidden meaning" or attitude to my words and get pissed at me. Just yesterday I was preparing dinner with my bf, went to grab a utensil next to him too quickly and felt that huge familiar rush of shame/anxiety and apologized to him. He was confused and I was embarrassed realizing I still have this eggshell reaction on reflex, I'm always apologizing for myself and feeling like someone is going to get mad at me no matter what. It's a shitty way to live and feels bad man. I know I mostly just need to stop being a pussy since I don't live with my family anymore and just see them at gatherings but I feel Pavlovian trained somewhat, I need therapy unironically :(
>>
>>20323646
You're the putting yourself in that situation and you continue to do it.
>>
>>20323656
And I'll do it when I'm 96 and laying in my own piss. But I'm not fucking anyone. Not sure if that makes me worse than a slut. Maybe.
>>
>>20323594
That's what I said, but she got really bitter because I kept spouting this shit.
Honestly you might as well confront her subtly.

Sure she wanted some fuk, but to her, it's love.
It's fucked up, but you get used to it.
>>
>>20323670
Technically yes you are worse than a slut.
>>
>>20323674
Based
>>
>>20323498
Yeast
>>
Cut your name into my arm Kaylee Ann. Next time I go to the hospital I'm bashing my skull against the wall until I get restrained.
>>
>>20323711
>>20323498
Same here. No reason for it to be yeast. I keep my dick clean and wash it everyday, sometimes more than once a day. I don't fug girls or anyone else unfortunately.
>>
I keep thinking of you and I miss our silly convos and laughters. But you don't want to talk to me. You're avoiding me. You hate me. And I can't do anything about it.
>>
>>20323723
I love you and I hate you. I HaVe you.
>>
I have wanted to fuck every girl in my workplace, married or not (am guy). 2 people in particular i think want to fuck me too, but so not sure.

They are married too..... so want to fuckkkkk them.
>>
I started to crush on someone who reminded me of my ex in small ways -- their laugh, the way they spoke, random small mannerisms they had in common. Otherwise they are totally different. Different hobbies, interests, appearance, and certainly how they treat me and others.

Once I got to know my crush better, yes, they were very different. At least that's how it seemed through a computer screen and the handful of times we were able to fly across the country to see one another.

I risked so much in my life to make our relationship a reality, and now we live together. And now I see that I am an idiot and once again supporting a lazy, spoiled, thirsty, materialistic child. Cool. This relationship was the best thing to ever happen to me when it was virtual, and I can't ever deny that it changed my life and perspective for the better. But maybe we were only meant to love each other from a distance.
>>
>>20323760
just wondering, you male or female?
>>
>>20323764
I'm a woman
>>
>>20323671
It’s for a guy, but you’re right.
>>
>>20323502
He was abusive. It’s not your fault he can’t love properly.
>>
>>20323772
Not him but I've seen this happen once. In a bit different way because I was actually told that I remind her too much of her ex and she can't be with me because apparently because of me she still loves him. Weird way of thinking honestly. Sucks because I loved her so much. I suppose all the nice things she did for me weren't really meant for me. I was just a stand in...
>>
>>20323785
I'm sorry to hear about that. Honestly, I can confidently say that I don't love my ex now, but I am starting to dislike my boyfriend and even feel suspicious of him because I feel like our relationship will go down the same path as my relationship with my ex. I know it isn't fair of me, so I am trying not to let my stupid feelings be anything more than a stupid feeling, but it's hard when I see more (negative) similarities every day.
>>
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>>20320131
I can't be like him, I just wish I remembered how to be like myself.
>>
>>20323716
What about K.A. made you need to do that?
>>
>>20323796
Let go of him if you don't think he's a good partner. Search for someone who will not remind you of anyone at all, be that in a good way or a bad way. For your own sake and for the sake of the other person. There's nothing worse than being with someone just because he's a replacement to someone you truly love.
>>
>>20320131
I feel like my negative emotions have merit so I shouldn't just kill them with positivity. There's some reason I feel this way. Actually in the present moment I feel nothing and going forward I won't feel much either because I've been going so hard there's no time to feel anything but tired.
>>
>>20323818
For some people the negativity stems from their mental health. For others is comes from their shitty life position and no matter how much you try to think good about it, it's impossible without being completely delusional.
>>
I’d been having an on and off again affair with this woman for a little over a year now. It’s been a hell of a roller coaster because of the dynamics of our relationship and her mental illness. I thought it was worth it though, she’s the most loving and wonderful person I’d ever known. But about a month ago she called it off citing how it’s not right and the guilt has been overwhelming her lately. I don’t think she should be considering her husband treats her and the kids like trash (and I’ve seen it) and any pain I’ve dealt with has been well worth having her and all the great times we had.

Said to come back to her once I was over her but I’ve been blocked till now. She only answered an email or two and very short at that. I can tell she still loves me greatly and she’s overwhelmed.

But anytime I try to get her to talk again like how we used to be I get totally ignored. I can’t stand that feeling of losing someone I love deeply. I told her before I’d keep this secret even if she broke it off and that I had thought what would happen if I told her husband. But I’d totally ruin her marriage, relationship with the kids and that she’d hate me. There’s little chance that’d even work in my favor.

But now I’m not so sure of myself. The past few days I’ve really thought about telling her deadbeat husband damned the consequences. Maybe that’ll get me her, maybe that’ll free her from a shit marriage...and out of spite.

Those close to me always say I’m a kind and loving dude. But I don’t know what to make of this evil side of me. Everyone has one, but this is strong as hell. I think that scares me
>>
>>20323723
This is true.
Maybe if you didn't fuck up, I would still smirk at you.
I don't smirk anymore.
You pissed me off.
Sometimes I hope your property burns.
>>
I'm having a great time and hope to spread that to yall.

Hope you're well anons.
Remember its never too late to change.
>>
>>20320131
Well, that’s one long and embarrassing week. I’ve had a decline in mass and strength recently and decided to check my testosterone levels. They’re close to the lowest amount for a male and considering i’m 18, I think this is what keeps me away from improving my self physically. I started working out an year ago to go from skelly to my ideal body but for 1 year I noticed really minor changes. It sucks that God blessed me with a great face but cursed me with an awful physique.
>>
>>20324019
How's your diet and nutrition? Are you eating enough?
>>
>>20324136
A lot of carbs and protein because I’m on a bulk. I eat till my stomach can’t take it anymore. I avoid junk food and vegetables. I eat meat, nuts, eggs and lots of bread mostly
>>
My bf grosses me out. He needs to wash his asshole better and keep himself cleaner. Recently showed me an ingrown hair above his dick the size of a grape and almost puked. Then he told me he popped it later and I saw blood in the fucking sink after, like he didn't wash it all the way out. This morning it was gone but I'm still going to make him scrub it with hot water/soap when he gets home. Fucking gross. Why is he so FUCKING GROSS?
>>
Fuck you and your lying corrupt cheating abusive selfish weak ass bs.

You don't deserve any information on him.

Now everyone knows you have no rights, there's a restraining order against you, PERMANENT bitch! Psycho ass masochistic narcissistic parasitic POS
>>
>>20323603
It was the second D on the smiley face. That was one D too many anon. Better luck next time.
>>
I’m going to kill myself after the holidays but what do I do with my phone and laptop? I won’t speak to you about this, not because you’d try and stop me, I don’t think you would, but for other reasons. You are my best friend and I love you. You pretend to be indifferent or cold but I don’t think you are but even if it all meant nothing to you, it doesn’t matter. I hope all your dreams come true, hold on to them. You’re driven and I admire that about you. I’m sorry I can’t really say these things to you or even send the letter I wrote you. I think maybe you’ll think I blame you but you didn’t do anything wrong. You’ve made me very happy. I love my family, they know how much I love them and I know they’ll be okay. S, will be better off. I hurt him but what you don’t know is how much he hurt me. I don’t talk about that to anyone. I wasn’t ever able to overcome my past the way many others have. I thought I was strong but I was fooling myself. I tried for many years. I did do some things I’m very proud of, though. I don’t feel sorry for myself and I’m not sad. I’m resolute. If anyone reads this can you tell me how to get rid of my laptop and phone, please?
>>
>>20324510
You will regret it
>>
>>20324510
> If anyone reads this can you tell me how to get rid of my laptop and phone, please?

It's always agitating that these suicide posts are always just a bunch of emotional ranting followed by some stupid question they feel would justify a response so they know somebody read it. I'm not answering your stupid rhetorical question, Anon.

Just tell me thing. What's going on. Talking helps, and this is a great place to talk. No reason to be shy.
>>
I love and hate you
>>
>>20324510
hey. it’s actually me. whatever your reasons, i deserve a conversation about this whole fiasco.
>>
I really can't believe this. Why do I care this much, we're not together, never were. Yet, I am honestly so... upset? I know you're busy but if a fucking CEO of a ftse 100 company manages to talk to me more than you I'm not sure you're managing your time right. Or maybe you are, and I'm just really low on the list.. which I guess is fair. I honestly just wish you'd actually communicate with me.
>>
Everyone has a breaking point.

I've reached mine.
>>
>>20324688
And this is what it's like to go even further beyond!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>>20324567
Thank you but I’m done trying. I won’t respond again, I’m not seeking attention I just needed to get my feelings out.
>>
>>20324619
You’re not him and even if you were there is nothing to talk about.
>>
I don't know where you are and I don't know what you're doing.... I just hope you are okay. I fucking love you with all my heart and I always will. Nothing was your fault and you were right about absolutely everything. There is zero ill will in my heart for you. I sometimes dream about you and maybe we will meet sometime again on the other side, until then just now that I love you.
I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you.
Take care for me
>>
Please stop messaging me. I can’t talk now. I can’t.
>>
>>20324717
Jesus christ
>>
I can't tell if the electric company is mafia-run or *that* incompetent. Over charging, terrible customer service 99% of the time, random $1000+ charge with no description, like - what? Meanwhile my ex who never paid his share when we lived together gets a random, no description $1,000+ credit for no reason, and doesn't have to pay their bill.

Every roommate I've had has been a deadbeat, and when I couldn't pay their share the debt went in my name. I hoped I would be able to have a fresh start and stay on top of my bills once I had an energy efficient, small, place to live solo, but they just keep adding to the insanity in a 'YOU WILL NEVER CATCH UP MUAHAHA' way. It genuinely feels like this city doesn't want to see me succeed in any way.

I have to move.
>>
>>20324709
There's nothing wrong with seeking attention. Humans are social creatures, that's not what agitates me.

My point was that it's an emotional solution to an emotional problem, and thus the whole scenario lacks any sort of logic. You reach out, but your afraid of contact. Your desperate, but you don't want to inconvenience others.

Getting hurt sucks, I get that. Sometimes, you've just got to let others decide if they want to be there for you. Don't try to make that choice for them. It's okay to need help.
>>
I deeply regret dating the guy I married.
>>
I haven't been eating for days and I'm slowly becoming a skeleton. Today I ate A LOT, because I had to eat for social reasons, so my appetite came back and I just ate a big meal and now I'm so afraid. I'm not even enjoying it. My stomach is too full. I'm so scared of being fat and unattractive.
>>
>>20324798
Why?
>>
I did it lads. I asked her out and she said yes. I posted here a couple times about bringing myself to do it, but I finally got an opportunity and I didn't let it go to waste. Thanks everyone. I'll see you on the other side.
>>
>>20324772
Bite me
>>
>>20320131
Someone please read this:

I live In a 2nd world shithole, and my only friend lives In japan. Lately he teases me a lot that I'm still living In my country. He means It In a sarcastic way but I am getting really depressed/stressed because of this. I am getting jealous as well. I don't want to cut him out of my life, but seeing him so happy and him being bragging all the time makes me hate him. So, should I cut him out of my life or not?
>>
>>20325035
Yes, focus on yourself.
>>
You know the image with the skeleton with all the A's? I don't have it but it's mood.
>>
>>20323807
>>20323716
Bump
>>
I asked a girl out. We both really like each other, have a great connection. She was the first to say I love you. When I asked her she told me she needed time to think about it. I brought it up and she said she didn't know what I was talking about. To be fair she just got a new job in a much higher position than she was before. So she has a lot going on. I feel rejected though. I'm holding out that it's just because she's so busy, but now I feel like if I bring it up again she'll definitely say no. Am I just insecure in needing to put a label on what we have? I want to know though. I feel if we were committed it wouldn't be a question.
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>>20325208
Wait she already told you she loved you before you asked her out and then she said no?

If you're are older than like 20 then I wouldn't be with someone who says stuff like that so flippantly. Unless she was saying it in a clearly intentionally flippant and friendly way like "hey you know I love you but..."

What was the context of her saying that?
>>
Will you tell me? - V
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>>20325254
We are both older. Yeah she said I love you before hand. She was talking about what a deep profound connection we have. That we have a special bond that made her feel like we've known each other for a long time now. She was being sincere, and then told me she loved me. It threw me for a loop when I asked and she told me she needed time to think. I feel like she's playing games with me, but I love her too. The whole situation honestly confuses me. She carries on like nothing happened too. We do things that a normal couple does but I guess putting a label on it freaked her out?
>>
I can't tell if I even actually have feelings for her. Even if I do I don't think it's to the same extent at all. I should turn her down but I don't know how.
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I'm going to my ex's house soon to hang out and play instruments. I honestly can't tell if there's some subtext there I should be paying attention to. We're pretty friendly but not really flirty or anything, but then I usually try really really hard not to be, and pretend that I don't do anything out of any residual feelings for her.

Also wondered if I should get her a christmas present. If I get something edible like chocolates then I have the bonus of probably being offered one later, which is another way of spinning it in my head so it's actually a selfish act and not because I think she's nice and want to get her something.

Gotta love denial eh
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>>20320131
Shit man I'm not gonna make it
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How the fuck do you comfort someone that pretty much shoots down every attempt I make to do so? I offer suggestions, I offer kindness, I offer time and still I'm somehow in the wrong for not being able to comfort them?
What the fuck?
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>>20323711
>>20323720
Can't be yeast. I keep my dick clean as fuck.
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>>20325293
Hm ok. Well maybe give it a few weeks and and approach it again, not as in just ask her out again but just bring up last time and ask her concernedly if there's something wrong and whether she wants to talk about it. If you guys are close then you should both benefit from having a good chat about it.
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I'm totally sure they weren't innocent at-fucking-all. Nearly 20 years of running the world and you're telling me they weren't involved at-fucking-all?

Yeaaaaaa you fuckers are all dead. Kill them all.
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>>20321550
I didn't know they had internet access in the loony bin.
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>>20325328
Ok, yeast does not come from poor hygiene necessarily.

Yeast grows in dark moist areas and can be attributed to a sugary diet as well.

If the skin is shiny and red, that is yeast.
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>>20325385
Nope mine isn't shiny and red. It's a little bit dry, but not that much compared to the rest of my dick.
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>>20325338
Thank you for advice, I'll do just that. I really appreciate it.
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my head fucking hurts. It seems like any time I am direct with anybody I come off as aggressive. And it's usually only me. just standing up for myself. As if a condition of me being friends is me being wrong every now and then.
Why does this have to be the case? I keep to myself generally. Is it so wrong that I win sometimes?
>>
Not everyone makes it.
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>>20325439

Oh shit yeah man I get you. My personality comes off as irritating or offensive to a lot of people, and i get accused by a lot of bad shit I didn't do by people who know they can dick me around. This has been the case at school and at more than one paying job I've held. In a good situation I can make up for my personality with confidence.

I really just prefer situations where I can talk in a relaxed way that's actually "me". I miss being in college and exchanging stupid edgy comments with my classmates and professors.
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>>20323394

>AOC and Bernie
>"Far" left

lol
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What's with the multiple personality disorder dude that keeps posting here or the other dude that keeps threatening to murder people?

Very weird and uncomfortable to read.
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>>20325502
Thanks anon, I really feel like I'm going crazy.
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reposting here...
3 weeks ago...
>be in relationship for 1.5 years, first relationship (both 21)
>flame starts to die in last two months, wont go into full detail
>I start the breakup, but it was kind of mutual
>Both admit we still have some feelings for each other but remain semi-friends, peaceful terms

This week
>new girl comes in to work, also 21
>pretty cute, thought I don't know much about her
>seems slightly interested in me, always a bright smile when I see her, laughs at most of my jokes
>thinking about asking her out for coffee or something next week

But
>worried I might not be over my ex. I'm thinking about her less everyday though, but there's still some feelings
>worried I might be using this girl for sexual/emotional distraction from said ex, esp. because I don't know much about her

This is my first breakup so I really don't know what to think. Am I worried over nothing and should try and pursue this new girl? Coffee can't hurt, right? I'm not the kind of guy to want to sleep around, which I think is influencing my worries.
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>>20325514
Don't mind them. We are all a bit crazy here.
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stop fucking with my dreams. They only do it now to make me sleep deprived. They know I don't give a fuck about any of these messages, they are all complete and utter bullshit meant simply to confuse me with information.

every single one of you. The girls especially.
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>>20325583
I don't want to be one of you freaks. I don't want the surgeries. I fucking hate you people.
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>>20325587
im not going to have sex with any of you. I hate you fuckers. All of you.

If there is sex, it isn't with me. It's a look alike, a fake, or mind control. I will never have sex with fucking anyone, ever. I HATE ALL OF YOU SO FUCKING MUCH
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I don’t understand. We have a good connection. And things are getting better, even though you left me a year ago. It’s so hard being friends, I’m not sure that I’m not just kidding myself about this whole thing. All I’m doing is trying to not think about it, I am trying to justify moving on, but I can’t.
I’m not her... and I wish you would stop talking about her. I get it. You loved her. You would do things with her you have no interest in with me. Why do you keep me around? I need to leave but you seem interested and not avoiding me now.

I say I’m confused but I have the answer, I’m just too stupid and too much of a coward to do it.

So I’ll just vent here and go back to pretending to be fine. Like I have to be.
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I write gay fics on 4chan from time to time. I'm happy that my gf will never find out. Though I should move my working files to a place she'll never look. The last thing I want is for her to think I want some cock. It's mostly to get it out. Though if a cute enough girl(boy) were to offer, I don't think I would turn it down.
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>>20325299
None of us are going to make it anon, we may get away with it for awhile, but in the end, not one of us is going to make it.
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I'm tired of being sick and feeling shitty and in pain all the time. I have such a limited existence. I wish I'd just die from this already.
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>>20320131
I am such a fucking sub heellppppppp
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i will always love you, thank you for being kind to me, i just can't bear this. I'm too ill for you anyway.
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What's with this phenomenon when you and a girl on the street check each other out at the same time? Out of this sea of people 2 have "linked"? How?
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Why am I not enough for you...

I did everything I could to make you happy. Bought anything you wanted or asked for. Any type of animal you wanted you got...you never had to lift a finger for anything when Im around, I work through constant pains and my depression at my job so YOU can be happy!

But it wasnt enough, why was I not enough?

Since that day the only thing I can think about is putting a gun in my mouth and ending it...

Help.
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IM FUCKING GAY AND I HATE MYSELF SO FUCKING MUCH IM A DISGUSTING DEGENERATE FAGGOT I HATE MY SELF
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Can anyone explain to me why the sides/bottoms of the feet tingle a little when you masturbate? Is there something going on with connected nerves?
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I dont know how to get through to my husband that he's a racist. He goes on pol all the time and thinks that it's normal. He's scarIng away any normie friends I try to make. Idk what to do about this, because even though he says the n word and denies the holocaust he doesn't see this as bad behavior. He has even hinted that he believes other races are inferior, when called out on it he claims that he's not racist because he has never explicitly been mean to black people in person, but he only knows like 3 black people total...
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>>20325905
isn’t that my decision?
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https://youtu.be/sVUjuHvs1OA
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>>20325963
there is probably no way to do it. most white people are allergic to the very idea that they could be racist and if he's a holocaust denier or whatever he's probably too far gone and wouldn't care.

sucks when someone you love has some dumb notions. my condolences lol
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>>20325963
Get a swab of his DNA and submit it to 23&me and watch him cry is little bitch nazi tears.
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>>20325964
you're gonna change your mind and i don't want to go through a breakdown all over again. i swore nobody would let me feel that bad anymore.
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guess there's no opposite gender thread to ask this in

So I asked this girl out today and she said yes fairly enthusiastically. Told me to give her my number and I did.

She still hasn't texted me... should I be concerned or is she just trying to not seem too desperate?

Yeah I'm an idiot for not getting her number but I didn't think about it at the time.
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>>20326027
she is probably trying to appear not to be desperate. hopefully she will text you soon.
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>>20326080
I hope I didn't type my number into her phone wrong since i was simultaneously so hyped and anxious that it all sort of seems like a blur in hindsight lmao
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I was brought up by my dog and cat when I was young and sometimes I swear I behave more like them than by people

I spent more time with my dog and cat growing up than with my parents. My dog growing up was actually more of a parent to me than my actual mom and dad. She actually figured out how to get food from the pantry and bring it to me twice a day especially when my parents were out too late doing their own thing.

Most of my facial expressions were picked up from my dog and most of my body language from my cat. But because of this I seem scary weird and feral to most people I interact with. I know I should probably try to act more "human" but I kind of don't want to seeing how horrible people can be.
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>>20322979

There's only two people right now I'd feel comfortable doing that with and one of them comes here. I doubt he feels the same. It would be lovely, to be struggling and also successful with someone you love who also loves you, no? To be bold and go for it, after all this time. It is hard to be brave.
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>>20326026
Nobody makes you feel anything. You're the one reacting to the world. Maybe it's best to stop repressing all of those emotions for fear of judgement, and face them head on. Makes a lot more sense than using a permanent solution for a temporary problem.
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>>20323247

I don't want to be [just] friends. If I'm not responding the way you wanted then it wasn't really that deep of a desire.
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>>20326118
13 year old larper. Or schizochan.
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>>20326118
Stop, you're making me hungry.
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>>20323959

Please tell him. I'm your girl and I'm so lost and confused, I am overwhelmed, I want to be with you and make things better, I want to make things better where I am because it's the "right" thing to do, I don't want to hurt anyone and I don't want to be hurt. Although I don't agree with the mental illness part, women are too quickly labeled as such when it's anxiety stemming from men in their lives.
Stay blessed anon
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should i go out tonight even though i have work at 9? i will probably go straight there from where ever i sleep tonight
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I’m tired of everyone being better than me but there’s nothing I can do about that
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>>20326218
Don't feel bad about it. Celebrate it. Embrace and learn, and eventually you'll be one of them.
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https://youtu.be/3cFjEtjV3ZM
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I am the happiest and most productive I've ever been after re examining my life and consciously going out of my way to improve myself. and I cannot shake the feeling that the crash and burn segment is right around the corner.
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I really cared about you and all you can do is disappear RIGHT after we started really getting close and seeing each other multiple times a week? You can read my messages but not reply? You can't just tell me to fuck off? So maybe I didn't cause a problem.. Am I the backup? You are making sure you don't ruffle me so you can come back when your current attempt crashes and burns? Cause you know I love you and I'll be waiting for you like nothing happened? Fuck you. I love you but fuck you.
>>
Men are raised to be sexist and that's why they struggle today and end up killing women for not dating them.

Men and women are not inherently like this. Girls still group up being told they cannot achieve as good a lofe as boys, and it is a reality, but boys grow up being told to be masculine and feel their place is being taken over by girls when actually they are just exploring what they want to do without bring shoeboxed into it. Your sex does not determine your personality but people really still can't handle this and say any girl not acting like a stereotype is a tomboy, not a girly girl, as if things are inherently gender oriented. Which it is not.

The reason this bothers me is because men are taught to supress emotions but get angry when women express them, when they are actually angry they can't express theirs. They complain about any shortcomings they have are because schools accommodate how girls learn or dating gives control to women, instead of taking responsibility. They complain that girls and women hate men online when as radical as those people are, what I see far more often no matter where I go are men bitching about women. It's not even comparable. The idea of girl power is patronizing to me, but girls and boys have been raised differently and society as a whole is broken and inherently unfair.

I'm tired of this gender war bullshit.
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>>20326299
>Men are raised to be sexist and that's why they struggle today and end up killing women for not dating them.

I mean, about as sexist as women are raised for more or less being taught to belittle certain aspects of masculinity from a very young age. Sure. Adults tend to drag their own problems into their children's lives.

>Girls still group up being told they cannot achieve as good a life as boys

Sorry, where exactly did you hear this? That's the exact opposite of the message society has been shoehorning into out education system as far back as I can recall, and I'm getting fairly old. Girls are usually praised more than boys for exhibiting the qualities of leadership and independence.

>Boys grow up being told to be masculine and feel their place is being taken over by girls when actually they are just exploring what they want to do without bring shoeboxed into it.

Told to be masculine... yes. That their place is being taken over by girls? Absolutely not. Girls can absolutely do whatever they want. The real problem is that society values girls more than boys. They receive more attention, more encouragement, they're actually educated on their rights, everybody empathizes with them and gives them emotional support, and growing up you basically learn that the entire balance of control between men and women is reliant on this shitty system of trust that women won't abuse their rights. Doesn't work, even for children.

> Your sex does not determine your personality but people really still can't handle this and say any girl not acting like a stereotype is a tomboy, not a girly girl, as if things are inherently gender oriented. Which it is not.

Doesn't really apply to my personal experiences on the matter. There were two twin girls in my class that regularly dressed as boys, and everybody loved them. Nobody cares. You know what is seen as weird though? Men wearing women's clothing. Nobody accepts that. People will physically confront you for that.
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>>20326299
>men are taught to suppress emotions but get angry when women express them

I'm going to need context to understand this one. If you're talking about women crying in public, I can't say I've seen anybody complain. Usually everybody rushes over to see if she's okay. If it's anger, then sure, that's not exactly always appropriate to display in public. It's called decency.

>They complain about any shortcomings they have are because schools accommodate how girls learn or dating gives control to women, instead of taking responsibility.

Responsibility for what? Unfair and ambiguous laws that can and have been abused by women in the past? I don't see how that's something men can take responsibility for.


> They complain that girls and women hate men online when as radical as those people are, what I see far more often no matter where I go are men bitching about women. It's not even comparable.

I can half agree on this one. For a very long time, there were groups of men online that for whatever reason made it their mission to shame women. Not saying that's right. However, now the pendulum is swinging the other direction with the greater popularization and availability of social media networking platforms. It's not surprising to see men taking offense to it when they feel like their freedoms are being infringed because of the popularized radical ideologists of, "feminists". It's a serious threat, not just our feelings being hurt, I don't think anybody actually cares about that bit. The laws, the lobbies, the groups, and the protests are very real though.
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>>20326026
i mean, you’d still be hurting yourself. if i want to be there for you, then why not let me?
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>>20320131
I don't give a shit about my wife anymore. Her attitude is terrible I don't even believe she likes me and after putting in tons of effort and trying counselling and her not giving a shit I'm done trying also. So I'm gonna live out the lease with her and then I'm done.

It's sad because I wanted my marriage to work but I don't really want a functional marriage if it's to be with a sociopathic frigid bitch that doesn't like being around me or anything about me.
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im obsessed eith wanting to get laid but i dont want to be a slut either. Every time my mind wanders, it'll go to thinking about dicks or something and its honestly becoming a pain.
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I can’t do this, I can’t be your friend. I wish you’d like me more but you don’t, and I hate myself for wishing that. All I wanted was to get closer, I’m sorry.
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>>20326341
What happun?
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>>20326369
Get a boyfriend to put you at ease.
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I possess information that could potentially ruin a sexually and emotionally abusive piece of shit's life (or at least force her to move out of the area), but she's female and no one knows that side of her except for me and her exes. She constantly plays the victim card, so if something were to leak people would feel sorry for her instead of wondering why the leak happened. I also don't want legal trouble of any sort in my life (though I haven't done anything illegal to get the information I have, so there technically wouldn't be a case), but I do have the chance to right some wrongs on a universal scale...this is bothering me a lot.
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>>20326325

I cut it for character space just fyi.

>I mean, about as sexist as women are raised for more or less being taught to belittle certain aspects of masculinity from a very young age....

First you have to understand that people are raised a number of ways. Everyone has different experiences so what's frustrating is when soneone tries to tell you how you were raised and where you grew up. Girls aren't raised to belitte men. I'm honestly unsure where this even comes from. TV and media doesn't reflect real life and for my generation being raised by parents raised the same way, girls and boys are treated differently. Boys can have fun and make mistakes, but girls cannot. If they like boy things that aren't being good daughters and if they like gir things thise things are inherently dumber. You can still see this now where womens hobbies are mocked and men aren't. Some examples are yoga, coffee, makeup, things that aren't inherently female things but because thatis what society says to do, people mock it for being female things.

>Sorry, where exactly did you hear this? That's the exact opposite of the message society has been....

Like above, schools and media show an equality but that isn't real life, that's the ideal they want society to have. Endless amounts of women have spoken up and said their experiences are otherwise, try to listen to them.

It absolutely is. Society doesn't change overnight, I grew up as a girl and I feel this way, media trying to bring me up and at the same time people in real life blame me and victimize me. Men are only very recently being treated similarly and understanding.

There are tons of crossdressers accepted in society. Maybe not by everyone but it is becoming more acceptable. And this is just my point, girls and boys are raised to be a certain way, and in parts of the world these ideas are still very prominent. Of course your experiences will differ from mine but this was my reality growing up.
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>>20326369
Why not just get a bf?
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>>20326423
How is she sexually abusive?
Look, it will hurt for a while, but trust me once you get some more experience and potentially find a lover you want to work things out with, the pain of this person will be gone and you'll find their sad life funny.
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>>20320552
I'm sure you will anon. Don't worry about it.
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>>20326437

She's a goddamn rapist, that's how. Also, I never dated this person. She's just generally a piece of shit that makes everyone that she comes into contact with unhappy, and if she were to leave things would be easier for me and for my friends.
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>>20326335

>I'm going to need context to understand this one. If you're talking about women crying in public, I can't say I've seen anybody complain. Usually everybody rushes over to see if she's okay. If it's anger, then sure, that's not exactly always appropriate to display in public. It's called decency.

Because that's what I mean. You don't see it because it isn't encouraged. So they express these things online very frequently. This is just one of many examples.. read the comments.

https://youtu.be/312sbdaZVUo

>Responsibility for what?

Not having success in school, work, and relationships/dating.

>I can half agree on this one. For a very long time, there were groups of men online that...

There were not groups. There ARE groups. Not just a club but it is a huge portion of the male population, but loke we both agree on they have supressed these feelings because 1. they cannot express emotions and be manky and 2. it now gets a lot of reaction that they can't handle. I think both sides have radical people but the number of women and men is not comparable, it seems that women are doing more but onky because they are louder, but the reality of how people reslly feel is that men feel slighted. And it is only because people are fibally starting to treat the genders fairly. The unfair laws biased towards women are inherently sexist, and were created by men. Men have done this to themselves using women as a tool. Society is at a place where this needs to change and that's what's happening. I'm just tired of it is all I needed to get off my chest.
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>>20320850
Man up. Grow some balls. The person you're wondering about could literally die tomorrow and you'd be stuck wondering what if. Text "hey, is there something wrong?" to this person and be direct and forceful about it. Press the issue. If they don't wanna reconcile, cut your losses.
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>>20326341
I know that feel... I'm currently living it now.
>>
>have 8 1/2 inch dick
>still gonna die a virgin
What did God mean by this?
>>
I am so torn right now. I want my marriage to work out because sacredness of marriage, and I still find him attractive in some ways, kind of like when we were first banging, because he's so unavilable. He now sees marriage to me as a cage. It's partially my fault for not putting out for so long. However he would constantly make cutting remarks about me personally, complain about me going out looking nice, instead of asking me to dress up nicely for him so we could go out or whatever. Would do nice things for me out of guilt, but still kept up a wall between me and female friends, sisters, I always come second to them. Now he runs away. Tells his therapist he wants a divorce but won't tell his friends or family. I tried giving him a blowjob to shut him up and it... failed. It had been too long, and he's possibly found some other one main woman to lust after, and now he rejects all my advances. So I've been polite, little touches here and there, hugs from behind since he won't hug back, etc. He's still mean as hell. Buys me things I need, but comes home 2-4am every goddamn time he goes out and sleeps anywhere in the house I'm not. I know he's flirting and being a shit husband in general. That's what he does around his guy friends.

I still think fondly of my ex, who wants to talk again. The sex was just better. I'll never tell him that but, he's just so mean and communicates that he hates me, I could never enjoy sex with him without being mindlessly drunk or stoned. He was much hotter as a ONS even though I didn't get off then either, because it was too obvious in the middle of fucking he was only in it for himself. What a place to be in.
>>
You could have had me and still can; just know that it won't happen by me going after you again, because I won't. I don't get you (I hope you get the pun).
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>>20325943
Respond
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>>20326579
You’re right. It will never happen.
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>>20326579
Was that you just standing around staring?
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Well, I did it again. I sperged out, revealed my sad boy power level, the whole 9 yards. It's bad. Oof is it fucking bad. I can only hope she's a saint and keeps it to herself. But bracing for damage control regardless.

Fuck I'm fucked. The whole thing, all the way back when we first met to now, it just keeps replaying in my head. What was I thinking that entire time???? You know /adv, I think I am actually crazy sometimes.

Fuck I'm getting too old for this shit.

I think I'm finally going to go see a therapist.
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>>20326592
I didn't say that.

>>20326593
Care to be more specific?
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>>20326643
Fucking hell.
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>>20326668
Just today I noticed you stuck around to glimpse at me.
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>>20326743
I did actually kind of do that today. She's too cute for her own good.
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>>20326137
It's not too aggressive to keep trying?
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>>20326793
>>20326743
>She's too cute for her own good.
Don't take that as an insult - it's just a bit of a tease. She's too cute that boys (like myself) fall in love with her which gets her into trouble.
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Okay so I have a problem with rds, giving me an addiction prone personality, I've gotten my shit tgthr but I'm struggling to find the motivation to stay alive. No junk food, no money, no booze, and husband has ED so no sex. Exactly why the fuck do I even bother, this is worthless. The next normie asshole who thinks a good book and a glass of water with cucumber is going to cure me is getting shot with a bb gun. How fucking asanine.
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I survived but Mum and Dad are still missing.
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>>20327308
I hope they're OK.
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>>20327308
I'm sorry. What happened?
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What a problem. My first non-drunken hookup coming up tomorrow, trying to decide between nutting today in hopes of lasting a bit longer and holding out one more day to make sure I stay hard, because this ain't something i'm used to. Or maybe I'll drink a few more than her in advance.
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>>20320131
I feel weak but my parents don’t want me to go on TRT.
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I feel alive again with him.
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Bish if you don't start actin right...
>>
I've been hanging out with a girl for the last few weeks. When we first met, she was really clearly into me, asking probing questions about whether I had kids, a gf, what kinda girls I date and we've had a lot of fun together. Lately she has been more... withdrawn and started telling me things like "you're so sweet" and thanking me for friendship. I've never had any friendly intentions so I told her straight up that's not why I'm here. She acted like it's some new revelation and kinda dodges addressing it. I've given her an out to say if she's not interested in me as a more than a friend, but she won't say anything directly but I know she's not as touchy and "in my space" as she was at first. She still texts me every day and wants to hang out but I don't want to hang out with her as friends, and I don't want her trying to accuse me down the line of trying to be friends with her to get in her pants. She knows I want in her pants and have since day 1, so I have a dilemma. Do I just accept that she doesn't return my interest and keep hanging out with her as a friend secretly hoping things change, or do I just count it as a loss and walk away? It just feels like at some point there was a unilateral context change and if I hung around, I'd just be living under false pretenses in some misguided attempt to be a "good guy".



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